# quote

date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906587
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.573109
text:
  <BloodFromStone> XP probably has a button that summons local
  monkeys to brutalize my isp.
  <[Sl]Ashy> no, bfs
  <[Sl]Ashy> I'm afraid that first the monkeys duct tape you to
  a chair and taunt you, then proceed to take off your clothing,
  take pictures for later blackmail, and -then- rip your ISP's
  server to shreds.
  <BloodFromStone> o_o
  <BloodFromStone> XP is dangerous.
  <[Sl]Ashy> Yes.
  <Iepetus> yeah
  <[Sl]Ashy> Handle with care.
  <Iepetus> monkeys seem cute and all
  <Iepetus> but when that happens... it's no fun
  <Iepetus> ...
  <Iepetus> or so I hear


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906589
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.574050
text:
  <shaine> Siege: kansas' best song is dust in the wind. listen
  to it
  <Siege> k ill download it
  <Siege> Haha i accidentally typed in "dst in the wind" in the
  search box
  <Siege>  and child pron came up.
  <shaine> you must have turned on 'my favorites' or something.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906589
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.574109
text:
  <@Aaron> It's really simple to watch a move, just open the
  console, and type "
  <@Aaron> ffmpeg -i "$(find ~/.mozilla -regex '.*Cache.*' -a
  -not -regex \
  <@Aaron>   '.*_CACHE_.*' -printf '%T+ %p\n' | \
  <@Aaron>   sort -n | awk '{ print $2 }' | xargs file | \
  <@Aaron>   grep -i "Video" | tail -1 | awk -F : '{ print $1 }
  ')" \
  <@Aaron>   -vcodec msmpeg4v2 -b 200 -ab 64 -ar 22050 -s
  320x240 \
  <@Aaron>   /tmp/video.avi
  <@Aaron> ANYONE CAN DO IT


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906590
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.574146
text:
  <Affe> god damn black socks
  <Affe> i need to start pairing them together
  <Affe> i pulled some out figuring 'oh if i pull out a few,
  i'll eventually end up with a pair'
  <Affe> i had 8 different kinds of socks in my hand
  <Ouroboros> Wow, Affe.
  <Ouroboros> Your life must be incredibly boring if you thought
  that was interesting enough to tell us.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906590
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.574185
text:
  <sena> baby
  ð sena hugtackles arkenstone
  <sena> arkenstone: i miss you :(
  <arkenstone> ello ness
  <sena> and dave's going home
  <arkenstone> Pfft
  <arkenstone> i haven't been gone long
  <sena> and i have no one here
  <sena> and i'm horney
  ð sena grins
  ð arkenstone is away -( busy for a sec )- at 02:59p -( P:On /
  L:On )-
  -:- arkenstone is now known as ark|away
  <golgy> lol :)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906591
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.574309
text:
  <JtHM> http://members.cox.net/image.server/
  nat-portman-pikey.jpg <- hrmmmm
  <shpongle> jt - shes going commando !
  <JtHM> she's going on an archeological dig!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906591
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.574339
text:
  <|VenoMtv|> my dad called me up to wish me a happy birthday
  <|VenoMtv|> he said, happy 22 birthday, and i replied, dad,
  i'm 23
  <|VenoMtv|> and he said, but i thought u started to drink last
  year
  <|VenoMtv|> i said, no, i started in high school =x


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906591
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.574393
text:
  <z_evil1> does _anyone_ on IRC update the topic field of a
  channel to suit the actual topic of conversation?
  *** Madeleine changes topic to 'fuck all, as usual'
  <Madeleine> set that to keeptopic, forever


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906591
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.574461
text:
  *** treker has joined #ircop
  <treker> what is this channel for?
  <_zenon> sex channel treker
  <treker> AH, I see...
  <treker> well then by all means, go ahead, have fun...i'll
  just go run some errands.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906592
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.574517
text:
  <[werk]chin> i think its wrong for elderly people to be openly
  sexual at all
  <[werk]chin> they need to be these asexual funnels of
  christmas money and bad driving


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906592
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.574601
text:
  <Hell`> russ where do u live ?
  <russ> delaware
  <Hell`> ill come and pick ya up
  <Hell`> if its on the way
  <Hell`> where the fuck it that
  <Hell`> i need a state !
  <Hell`> i need a state !
  <Hell`> i need a state !
  <Hell`> not a city
  <Hell`> lol


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906593
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.574623
text:
  * drdink ponders getting his dad the Magellan Meridian Gold
  GPS
  * drwiii watches irony strike as it gets lost in the mail.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906593
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.574695
text:
  TXTerron: i have of those
  strtoken: me too
  TXTerron: the first girl i ever got intimate says it was
  normal length but very large gerth
  TXTerron: that should have been my first clue she was a
  fucking slut


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906594
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.574751
text:
  +|+ [PIT]Kabar has joined #linux
  < [PIT]Kabar> ok i got a dumb question
  < [PIT]Kabar> <-- linux newb
  (+soroh6) well
  (+soroh6) we don't allow dumb questions
  (+soroh6) sorry.
  < [PIT]Kabar> bah usless
  < [PIT]Kabar> some great community
  +|+ [PIT]Kabar has left #linux []
  (+soroh6) HAHAHA
  (+soroh6) omg


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906594
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.574780
text:
  <reuben> send me a picture of you.
  <{Elmo}> no scanner
  <reuben> get one.
  <{Elmo}> no $$
  <ryano> in other words reub, you probably dont want to see her


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906594
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.574815
text:
  <Kyle|> im making a SHELL for WINDOWS that LOOKS and FEELS
  like the REAL STANDALONE OS THAT WILL BE DONE NOT SOON!
  <Urganite> what you mean to tell me
  <Urganite> is that you're going to create a windows program
  <Urganite> that just looks like what you want your OS to be?
  <Urganite> ...
  <Urganite> that's the stupidest thing I've ever heard in my
  life
  <Peasant> Someone should make a DHTML OS
  <Kyle|> peasant: dont give me ideas


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906595
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.574865
text:
  <dp> theres no games stores near me
  <dp> and by near i mean walking distance
  <dp> and by walking distance i mean within 30 metres


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906595
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.574893
text:
  <NinjaStu> ack! Scotch Irish on my keyboard!
  <NinjaStu> if i start typing funny
  <NinjaStu> my keyboard is intoxicated


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906595
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.574918
text:
  <HotelManager> plz com in avatar
  <Avatar> no
  <HotelManager> fine then youtr baned but when you want to get
  on the channell come and get me and i will unban you


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906596
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.574977
text:
  <DantesMinion> Hey baby, you took a 20 for bus tickets?
  <Esher> No. I got to work on a magical bus pulled by unicorns!
  <DantesMinion> REALLY!?
  <DantesMinion> BARBIE UNICORN ADVENTURES?
  <Esher> They told me I am the chosen child of destiny and my
  mission is to mate with all the women of the world to populate
  it with magical beasts of power
  <connor> lol wtf!?
  <DantesMinion> **growl**
  <Esher> Hey! You can't get mad at me! It's my DESTINY!
  <DantesMinion> every woman so that means the bald fat and ugly
  <Esher> Umm.. Err.. Except those ones?
  <DantesMinion> boy you gotta get it ON with them too
  <Esher> I don't love you anymore.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906596
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.575004
text:
  <Joe> Who invented l33t-speak?
  <Evil_Lawn_Gnome> Joe, I did.
  <milencho880> i invented it
  <Joe> Really? Good. I always wanted to meet the world's
  biggest fucking idiots.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906597
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.575032
text:
  <ryo-ohki> I'm gonna try setting up some Dutch auctions on
  eBay.
  <blazemore> you're supposed to be 18 to use ebay though :|
  <ryo-ohki> Tell that to my 200 pairs of dirty teen boy's
  undies.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906597
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.575059
text:
  <Blixt> I wonder if the Korean army uses starcraft tactics
  <Taerkar> extending the creep and sending hordes of zergs at
  their enemies?
  <Taerkar> "You! Mine those crystals. You two, into the gas
  factory."
  <Blixt> KEKE LA~ OFFICER!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906597
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.575089
text:
  <xcham> as part of my CS experience, I'm going to debug java
  to try and meet geek chicks. :P
  <xcham> then I'll e-mail Sun Microsystems and tell them "JAVA
  GOT ME LAID"
  <jimmiejaz> java and chicks only go together at starbucks.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906597
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.575120
text:
  <Theogony> must not like trick or treaters
  <phr0work> I didn't get ny
  <phr0work> fucking kids
  <Theogony> at least that greatly reduced the possibility of a
  lawsuit
  <phr0work> hehe
  <phr0work> also greatly reduced my chances of getting laid
  <phr0work> kids in shitty costumes can't run worth a fuck


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906598
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.575146
text:
  <Jon-> doing some C coding ;)
  <Anselmo> pfft
  <Anselmo> Learn a real language
  <Anselmo> Like Amiga Basic


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906598
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.575204
text:
  <Krys> I had the funniest phone call last night when I was at
  work
  <Krys> had to tell the guy to buy a new SIM card, because he
  fried his..and he was like "Okay thanks" and we ended the
  call..except he forgot to hang up
  <Krys> so I had my phone on mute and all you hear is "Stupid
  bitch" and he goes on insulting me...so I give him a few
  moments
  <Krys> I go on the line and I'm like "Sir, you may want to
  disconnect the line. I'm still here"
  <Krys> and he's like "OH FUCK" *click*


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906599
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.575236
text:
  <ATAD> I saw a girl that has a pikachu umbrella
  <ATAD> it's all yellow, has pikachu's face on it, and 2
  pikachu ears sticking off the top
  <Wagoo> Was she seckzy?
  <ATAD> iono
  <ATAD> I was looking at the pikachu umbrella more
  <Wagoo> "Hello my dear, that's an awfully attractive pikachu
  umberella you have there, maybe you'd like to come back to my
  dorm room to discuss it's forms, themes, and concept."


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906599
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.575261
text:
  (@watchy): hey io
  (@watchy): i am gonna put up a ebay auction
  (@watchy): i'm gonna auction my sperm
  (@watchy): haha
  *** Quits: watchy (Excess Flood)
  (@[IO]): or not


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906599
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.575291
text:
  <Cosmic_Bard> I've been caught masturbating before, by my mom.
  Dosen't sound quite as bad as that, but it was embarassing
  nontheless. Ysee, it was to those dancing girls in Duke Nukem
  3d. The ones that'll only flash you if you hit the spacebar
  and duke goes "Wanna Dance?"  and "Shake it baby!"  I think
  that's what alerted my mother.
  <Cosmic_Bard> So now I always turn the speakers off when I
  masturbate.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906599
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.575324
text:
  < DGonzo> hmm
  < DGonzo> my gf left her shampoo and shit here
  < DGonzo> next thing you know she's gonna want to plug into my
  hub
  <@[Hobbes]> DGonzo: ... For christ's sake just change your
  name to DWhipped
  <@golem> tell her she can plug into your hub if you can plug
  into hers anytime you like


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906600
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.575352
text:
  <keithandmike-com> Just stop.. okay. Damnit, I hate you so
  much. You probably sit and write these down and just wait for
  me to join. Bastard. Eat corn poop.
  <Fembot> Mike joined the Navy and wanted to become a SEAL...
  there was something appealing about their creed to "never
  leave their buddy's behind"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906600
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.575409
text:
  <Legal18f> yet they insist on a/s/l!
  <smarm> hehe
  <Legal18f> Isn't it obvious by my nick that I'm a 21 year old
  male?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906601
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.575438
text:
  <leoboiko> I wanted to search for that flamewar in which Linus
  called the Gnome guys "fucking idiots"
  <leoboiko> so I googled for "torvalds gnome fucking"
  <leoboiko> luckly, google still doesn't give you exactly what
  you ask for


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906601
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.575463
text:
  ·Serfer· Let's not fight. Let's hug. For forty minutes. Nude.
  ·pHluid· 10 more minutes till I start my lunch break. Go ahead
  and grease up.
  ·Serfer· Not enough time.
  ·pHluid· Must be a lot of you to grease.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906601
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.575492
text:
  <cam[gt]> is it bad if you're driving down the road and see an
  address on a mailbox that's 1394, and the first thing you
  think of is firewire?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906602
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.575543
text:
  <matts> I was on vacation and I saw this casino advertisement
  on the highway: "LOOSEST $1 SLOTS" and they had a picture of a
  woman on it and then I realized that this casino ad could be
  taken the wrong way :P


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906602
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.575575
text:
  <@exit2eden9> my mother just told me the funniest story ever
  <@exit2eden9> she was in the supermarket before, and this
  person in front of her was fighting with her toddler...who
  kept taking candy off the rack and putting it in the cart...
  <@exit2eden9> she was saying "no...you cannot have candy...it
  is almost dinner time and you cant have any"  and this is
  going on for a while
  <@exit2eden9> so the kid yells really loud:
  <@exit2eden9> "if you dont let me have candy im gonna call
  gramma and tell her you had daddy's peepee in your mouth"
  <@exit2eden9> the woman ran out of the store...left all her
  groceries there


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906603
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.575624
text:
  <sceadu> i really need to figure out how to use a debugger in
  emacs
  <iank> pfft, how could you *not* know?
  <iank> It's just ctrl+alt+meta+f7+numlock+c+e+m+<
  <iank> Hell, you could discover that by accident in emacs..


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906603
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.575674
text:
  <zhirinovsky> do you know why old women don't get sex? have
  you ever tried to peel apart grilled cheese sandwich?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906604
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.575699
text:
  < kate> wat r u doin ryt now
  < Patrick`> Trying not to hunt you down and beat you into a
  pulp with a dictionary.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906604
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.575735
text:
  <DTOX> my wife pushed from 2-4 pm and then they said "fuck it"
  and got the foreceps and all that fun stuff
  <DTOX> but they gave her an episiotimy
  <DTOX> the doc took out these scissors with teeth and cut the
  skin between her vagina and anus
  <CoMBo> so when she takes a shit, it can leak into her cunt
  now?
  <DTOX> no, I don't know what it's like in canada, but they
  stiched her up afterwards
  <DTOX> they didn't give her some timbits and say "go back to
  your igloo"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906604
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.575759
text:
  <Avie> the only effect that videogames have had on my morals
  is deciding what weapon I would kill someone with if I did


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906605
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.575789
text:
  <Lucent> there should be a netflix for books
  <Lucent> read 'em, send 'em back
  <antiscout> there is
  <antiscout> it's called 'the library'


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906605
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.575820
text:
  <Deco> Two pakis in a Golf tried to cut in in front of me and
  nearly hit my car. Then they followed me even though it was
  their fault. They stopped next to me at the next set of
  traffic lights and the passenger said "I'll follow you home".
  I replied "Follow me to your mom's". You've never seen me
  drive as fast as I did trying to get away from them.
  <Deco> I loved the look of his face, though.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906605
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.575846
text:
  <pooshda-coloring> http://www.pooshda.com/temp/test_color.jpg
  <supreemball> that sucks poosh
  <supreemball> oh wait, lemme actually look at it


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906606
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.575872
text:
  <@Phil> Hey, not saying your vagina isn't mighty. I mean,
  people LOVE the grand canyon...
  <@Squash> Well guys like it when they can go in deep.
  <@Phil> Yeah, but not when they'll fall in and die.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906606
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.575894
text:
  Davo: i made a carrot cake once.
  Davo: no-one told me you had to grate the carrots i put em in
  whole
  DW: hahahahahahaha
  Davo: they got burnt black sticking outta top
  Davo: looked like a birthday cake holocaust


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906606
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.575919
text:
  < natx> so drawing maps from satelite imagery is a pretty fun
  job..
  < natx> but when i found out you cant zoom in far enough to
  see elephants
  < natx> i was really let down


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906606
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.575941
text:
  (?)     kullen- (~WTF-kulle@as8-1-2.am.g.bonet.se) enters
  #lesbian
  CoulomB:  turn around
  CoulomB:  no lesbians here.
  (?)     kullen- (~WTF-kulle@as8-1-2.am.g.bonet.se) leaves
  #lesbian
  CoulomB:  all gone, big lesbian fire of 96.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906607
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.575973
text:
  <Elise> hey do u have the compu wholesale purchase order at
  all?
  <logik> ?
  <logik> ummm
  <Elise> so?
  <logik> why do u need it
  <Elise> cause im attaching the invoice and entering it in myob
  then i need to do the billing ....
  <Elise> why do u ask?
  <Elise> have u eaten it or something?
  <Elise> ;)
  <logik> nah you see
  <logik> the thing is
  <logik> there was no toilet paper around


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906607
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.576026
text:
  <BTox> wow... oi can see the reflection of my fingers on the
  monitor..
  so i can watch myself type and it looks really weird. "how do
  i do that?!"
  <ShaneBe> it really is amazing
  <ShaneBe> to see peop;e ty[e


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906607
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.576048
text:
  EightyAngryApes : so I was sittin outside the gas station, at
  like 11 30 in the morning.
  EightyAngryApes : and suddenly this car pulls up and im like
  woah that looks like my dads car
  EightyAngryApes : then out steps my dad, rap music blaring
  from his speakers and some lady in his passenger seat (not my
  mom or anyone I know)
  EightyAngryApes : and he looks at me and hes like shouldn t u
  be in school? n im like shouldn t u be at work
  EightyAngryApes : so hes like this meeting never took place
  and im like agreed.
  EightyAngryApes : then he went in and walked out of the gas
  station carryin a box of condoms
  WattoEXTAO : !!HAAHAHAHA!!!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906608
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.576073
text:
  <Deim0s|1980> Argghh. You don't wanna know what I just did.
  And for the sake of my reputation, I ain't gonna tell ya.
  Ever.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906608
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.576110
text:
  <Zip-> hi RedMage
  <Zip-> i want your mother's sister's daughter's cousin's best
  friend's body
  <RedMage> ...
  <RedMage> that's like
  <RedMage> my best friend
  <RedMage> you sick fuck
  <RedMage> i'm my own best friend
  <RedMage> omg
  <RedMage> you WANT ME


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906608
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.576166
text:
  * Mas_Tnega decides to bring a friend in here
  [1718:49] * sibn is now known as Tnegas_Friend
  [1718:51] * Tnegas_Friend is now known as sibn
  <Mas_Tnega> sibn: My friendships are usually shorter than that
  <coolsi> less than 2 seconds?
  <coolsi> you must be a really big social reject
  <sibn> my friendships are usually shorter than my penis
  <Mas_Tnega> sibn: They don't exist?
  <sibn> Mas_Tnega: precisely


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906609
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.576196
text:
  <hiaku> our souls are like dead animals, everyone wants a poke
  at it
  <nerved> is that legal to have sex with dead animals?
  <hiaku> ...
  <hiaku> you're impossible
  <nerved> no i'm serious
  <nerved> don't want to get in trouble or anything...
  * nerved glances around innocently


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906609
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.576223
text:
  <Dr SpaZZo> A Reese's Peanut Butter Puff going directly down
  your throat is a LOT more painful than one might imagine.
  TwilightKnight jots that down
  <TwilightKnight> thanks
  <Dr SpaZZo> No problem.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906609
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.576248
text:
  <Ffieldboy23> dim sim get a life
  <chineseguy4u> why dun u go bak to greasy wogland and shave
  dat monobrow
  <chineseguy4u> and take dat fully sik rear schpoiler of urs
  bak to wogland


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906610
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.576276
text:
  <Liza> but.. plis.. tell to everybody that in argentina we
  live.. with human rigths broken i dont know how to express
  because my english is not so good help us!
  <divdiv> stop complaining, you get adsl, I'd gladly give up
  our human rights for adsl


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906610
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.576308
text:
  <Ransome_LightHawk> You know, I heard "The Passion" I so good
  they are going to make a book about it
  <Jaffar> Yeah. I think they're calling it "The Bible" or
  something
  <Jaffar> I dunno, sounds kind of silly to me.
  * Ransome_LightHawk nods
  <Jaffar> I mean, who'd read a book called "The Bible". Psh.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906611
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.576363
text:
  * ZondrZout has entered
  <Arathorn> hello
  <ZondrZout> Well, how typical...
  <ZondrZout> Only the bot greets me
  <Karyon> lol


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906611
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.576387
text:
  @(DonoftheDead) They say if you play a Microsoft CD backwards
  you hear satanic messages. That's nothing, because if you play
  it forwards it installs Windows.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906611
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.576413
text:
  <Fembot> Apple is co-branding a cpu line w/ Monty Python.
  it'll be called the "iFartinyourgeneraldirection"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906611
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.576439
text:
  <Emmy> When I was in Helsinki, I couldn't stay at the house of
  a friend, because they had - well, crawly things, too
  <Azif> babies?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906612
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.576465
text:
  <_git_> hey folks, what does @ mean in front of someones nick?
  <thorn``> The @ symbol identify's the channel operators..
  Chops have extra commands for control of the room
  <_git_> does it mean that persons is a sad wanker who spends
  his life on irc, has no real friends, and prefers to chat on
  here than in a pub?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906612
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.576490
text:
  <daniel> Scoobi Doo == communist regime funded propaganda used
  to infiltrate capitalist pop-culture to instill a low rate
  change in american ideals, they always said they'd take us
  over without firing one gun


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906612
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.576542
text:
  <NyseriA> i just hit my hand with a hammer
  <NyseriA> and the first thing i said was "SPLENDID"
  <NyseriA> which made me laugh
  <NyseriA> then i dropped the hammer on my foot because i was
  laughing at me saying splendid instead of FUCK


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906613
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.576566
text:
  <Smokey> What are the advantages of Trillina pro?
  <Amadeo> What are the advantages of you shutting the fuck up?
  *Amadeo just got a whole list in the span in 2 seconds there


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906613
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.576593
text:
  <MenTaLguY> You know, the trouble with cocaine is that the
  "...but I didn't inhale" excuse doesn't work


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906614
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.576621
text:
  <big_ernie> roses are red
  <big_ernie> violets are blue
  <big_ernie> my quote got rejected
  <big_ernie> so i say "fuck you"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906614
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.576656
text:
  <Digby> what if the man empirically measure them ? ;)
  <Digby> length, girth, tensile strength, and volume ;)
  <_Matty> volume?? "hey, baby, i've got a loud cock" ??
  <_Matty> wtf?
  <Tig`One> "hey babe wanna hear my cock shout?"
  <^Dozy^> that'd be an impressive chat up line
  <Guede> Brings new meaning to pump up the volume.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906614
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.576685
text:
  <K8> well the theme was aincient history
  <josh_ip_te> oh,
  <josh_ip_te> and you went as a viking?
  <K8> and my friend had some home made costumes
  * josh_ip_te wouldve gone as a black michael jackson


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906615
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.576717
text:
  (MC_SpEcS) huggles...who are you?
  (tiko-out) the blond chick who tried to suck you off @ God Is
  A DJ
  (tiko-out) unless you got multiple blond chicks offering that
  (tiko-out) she's the one who looked like a blonde muppet


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906615
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.576782
text:
  <sword> i have the perfect girlfriend
  <jon334> girlfriends are never perfect, m8
  <sword> well last night while she was giving me a back massage
  she asked me whether i wanted anything to eat or a blowjob or
  both. i said that im a bit tired so she got me a beer from the
  fridge and said that i should make myself comfortable
  <sword> cause she still hadnt finished my home assignment for
  the PHP class and she wanted to check /. too
  <jon334> she good looking?
  <sword> id say so, yea
  <jon334> MARRY HER! NOW


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906615
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.576810
text:
  *** anonimis has joined #kdl
  <anonimis> join #5fm
  <orbit> erm...
  <orbit> what?
  *** anonimis was kicked by orbit (dont advertise in here)
  <Quench> lol
  <Quench> he missed the /
  <Quench> you moron


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906615
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.576838
text:
  <@terminal> dudes i must say
  <@terminal> it's interesting to start your day off with a
  morning BJ
  <@renounced> you should probably tell the police your step
  father is molesting you


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906616
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.576917
text:
  < lithium> btw, i'm selling a CD-RW drive if anyone's looking
  for one
  < atlas> Damn. It's a pity you didn't ask me in 1997, I'd have
  been interested.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906616
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.576949
text:
  <JeighEighm> Tauren, why don't you just sniff the packets and
  find out?
  <Tauren> how do i DO THAT?
  <Tauren> how  do I sniff packets
  <JeighEighm> Tauren, okay. It's easy. Get your network cable.
  <Tauren> How do I sniff?
  <JeighEighm> Hold it to your nose.
  <JeighEighm> Inhale.
  <JeighEighm> Smell those packets.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906616
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.576972
text:
  WiTriDi: hmm so he got even more raged than you
  Searanger: k thnx bye
  WiTriDi: ??
  WiTriDi: lol??
  WiTriDi: your leaving me
  WiTriDi: i will not stand for this
  WiTriDi: how can we keep our relationship alive
  WiTriDi: if you keep ignoring me
  WiTriDi: are you even listening
  WiTriDi: GOD I DONT EVEN KNOW WHY I TRY
  Searanger: i go to the washroom for 1 minute
  Searanger: and u serve me divorce papers


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906617
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.577002
text:
  *** Joins: lick_me_man (sss@202.146.243.202)
  <@splicer|work> lick_me_man: <-- one of the lesser known
  superheroes


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906617
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.577030
text:
  <Yajinden> I like this temperature-based designation system we
  have.
  <Yajinden> it's good to be hot, and it's good to be cool, but
  it's not good to be frigid, and it's not good to be flaming.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906617
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.577055
text:
  <LeXX-> so like one time on 2600 irc, liquidpc shoved a usb
  cable up his mothers ass.
  <Klassh> man, usb really IS universal


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906618
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.577082
text:
  <Moonpie> one time, in middle school, some people let some
  pigs onto the campus. They painted on the pigs "1", "2", and
  "4". The faculty spent weeks looking for the third one.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906618
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.577135
text:
  <Super_Pirate> "Women age like fine wine"
  <Super_Pirate> Show me one woman, one ANYONE for that matter,
  that tastes better with age . . .
  <Super_Pirate> And I'll show you a mental institution for
  tasting people.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906619
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.577164
text:
  <bytraper> I went to a strip club with my buddy.... anyway a
  friend of his chicks see's him there... and phones her up and
  tells her... she fires up and rocks up and grabs him by the
  hair and drags him out... anyway I figure im there so I may as
  well keep drinking... anyway 5 minutes later she's on the
  phone to my chick telling her Im there getting sex and guess
  who rocks up 5 minutes later??


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906621
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.577214
text:
  <y0da> if they took the porn of the internet there would only
  be one website left and that would be
  www.bringbackbacktheporn.com


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906622
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.577267
text:
  <papasui> i bought a box of crab ragoons
  <papasui> and i looked to see how many calories are in each
  one
  <papasui> and its freaking 400 and 250 fat calories
  <Marcus-> "WARNING: May cause manboobs!"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906622
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.577293
text:
  i am RAWK: you know, I don't think I ever really realized how
  much boys jack off before I started reading bash.org
  i am RAWK: i mean, I kinna figured it was a frequent thing,
  but it seems astronomical now
  QuakeZop: haha, I've done it fifteen times since you left here


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906622
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.577319
text:
  <knobboy> I hate physics
  <knobboy> Having to learn all this crap about wave and
  frequency is killing me
  <knobboy> Some might even say it Mhz


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906623
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.577348
text:
  <Ich> I have passed the transitional stage of internet
  geekhood
  <Ich> I was cashiering at work today, and was punching in the
  code for plums, which is 4040.
  <Ich> and the 0 key doesn't work this well, so I punched it in
  wrong.
  <Ich> and the machine flashed up "Item Not Found: 404"
  <Ich> and I actually laughed out loud


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906623
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.577376
text:
  <iFx|shade> this guy aidan was aruging with this chick emma at
  tea
  <iFx|shade> and shes like saying it wouldnt hurt that much
  getting kicked in the balls
  <iFx|shade> and he goes spread your legs then and ill kick you
  in the balls
  <iFx|shade> and shes like i dont have balls
  <iFx|shade> and he goes who are you trying to kid with a
  mostache like that
  <iFx|shade> and she got up and left


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906624
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.577425
text:
  <Xenophon> I was talking to this really cute girl, when I was
  on a walk with my parents. I hadn't seen her in years. After
  exchanging university experiences, I asked for her ph # and my
  dad jumped out of the woodwork and said "I'll memorize half of
  it for ya!"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906624
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.577452
text:
  Milamber: hopefully that will get him outa trouble
  Mick: yeah because that was in the top 20 of worst wiring jobs
  Mick: nothign will beat number 1
  Milamber: no. 1?
  Mick: ooh that was amazing
  Mick: it was a corolla
  Mick: painted blue and red with housepaint outside
  Mick: with green wheels
  Mick: inside was painted blue with rattlecans including the
  seats
  Mick: there was rubbish and rotten food on the ground as high
  as the bottom of the seat
  Mick: the radio was a tape player that he wanted replaced with
  a clarion cd tuner
  Mick: tape player was held in with winnie blue cig packets,
  some bandaids and chewing gum
  Mick: to get the old one out they had smashed the dash
  Mick: it was wired up with bits of house wire and extension
  cords
  Mick: they had hacked a hole in the firewall to run the power
  for the radio straight off the start motor
  Mick: which the wiries were sticky taped onto the starter
  motor
  Mick: the speakers in the back were sitting on the shelf being
  held in by just the force of their own magnets as it had no
  parcelshelf
  Milamber: woooooow did you just tell him where to stick it?
  Mick: I threw up from the smell in the car on the workshop
  floor
  Mick: gene had to help me up
  Mick: he called the customer who was told to go home and burn
  the car
  Milamber: ROFL


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906624
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.577474
text:
  [WaRe-WoLf] you know i gotta find a girl, get her pregnant so
  i can have a kid to dig around with those cables behind the tv


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906624
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.577495
text:
  Chibinaeko: OH OH!!! Tell me what a boygasm feels like!!!!
  azurerenraku: Too hard to explain
  Chibinaeko: would you try for a scooby snack?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906625
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.577521
text:
  <Mr_Joshua> no, they take those silicone bags & put them in
  boxes with electronic equipment after writing "do not eat" all
  over them.
  <juvenile> ...
  <juvenile> Is that really a problem?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906625
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.577543
text:
  * krazy (~krazy@cD9088C66.sdsl.catch.no) Quit (Quit: A good
  discussion is like a miniskirt; Short enough to pertain
  interest and long enough to cover the subject.)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906626
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.577592
text:
  Blood Reaper:  on a scale of 1 to 10
  Blood Reaper:  how old do you think michael jackson's
  boyfriend is?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906626
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.577621
text:
  <Villager> haven't you heard the phrase 'big is beautiful'?
  <Alexander> i've heard the phrase 'fat is repulsive'


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906626
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.577670
text:
  {RainmakeR}: fuck I'm a retard
  {RainmakeR}: I was trying to use windows magnifier to enlarge
  the dead pixel area to look at it better
  {RainmakeR}: i had it open for like 5 seconds, then like "wait
  a minute... "


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906627
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.577696
text:
  <MikeG520> Hey how do I ban an ip from my computer
  <MikeG520> actually, a whole subnet
  <MikeG520> er isp


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906627
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.577722
text:
  <Cyrix_> everytime you take a crap, you design the unique
  cracks and lines in your terds, and sometimes decorate them
  with peanuts or corn
  <Cyrix_> and occasionally, you tint the shade. thats all
  designing


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906628
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.577769
text:
  <FuManChu> And now, FuManChu presents another segment of
  "Things I Learned In College:
  <FuManChu> I learned today that if you have sex with your
  girlfriend's younger sister, you will have a fight in the
  middle of the campus center, regardless of what you try to
  say.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906628
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.577796
text:
  <SVJ-FuNiOnZ> man this sucks
  <SVJ-FuNiOnZ> i got new deoderant and it smells like my
  grandpas cologne
  <SVJ-FuNiOnZ> so i cant jackoff without seeing a mental image
  of my grandpa


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906628
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.577822
text:
  taz10021: sleeeeep
  VindicateD: Writing Paaaaaper
  taz100: lol
  taz100: you're still awake?
  taz100: heh
  VindicateD: No...this is the world's smartest away message
  talking.
  VindicateD: ;)
  taz100: not if you couldn't figure out that was rhetorical
  taz100: ;-)
  VindicateD: touche


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906628
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.577845
text:
  <[CKS]Red_Robot> i know i should be working on my paper, but
  id rather be playing warcraft, so to compromise im doing
  almost nothing


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906629
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.577874
text:
  <Silellak> Do you remember the good old days, when bottle caps
  said "YOU WIN" or "YOU LOSE", rather than giving you some lame
  code you redeem at their ad-filled website?
  <Silellak> I miss being told I'm a loser by a corporate
  product :(


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906629
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.577903
text:
  <Caspian777> Once I get my picture on the net, you'll see. :P
  <Suvorov> ooh can i have your picture?
  <Suvorov> no baby ones though - i can't masturbate to those


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906629
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.577931
text:
  <[pxd]Dan> is it me or does every boy / girl online in the use
  or canada have parents who are divorced or separated or close
  to
  <I_AM_AVRIL> most of them just do it for the sympathy
  <I_AM_AVRIL> and while we're on the subject, my mums dead
  <I_AM_AVRIL> and i slit my wrists


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906630
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.577959
text:
  <dr_dna> no, i love animals - ive been a vulcan for 12 years
  <jdk> don't you mean a vegan?
  <dr_dna> what, with these ears?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906630
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.578039
text:
  (lawngrl): im gonna insert my ipod in my vagina tonight and go
  to sleep i love it so much
  (Fire_on_High): I'm quite sure that'll void your warranty


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906631
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.578063
text:
  <BOB_LOE> If you dog shits on the pavement you get a fine of
  $500, indecent exposure is $300, so if your dog shits on the
  pavement and the police come, drop your pants and say its
  yours.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906631
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.578125
text:
  <Demonhunter> so.. i may be losing my cable modem soon.. who
  knows
  <Idle_Timmy> man, that sucks.
  <Idle_Timmy> maybe you need a mike's hard lemonade.
  <Demonhunter> i need a liter of jaggermeister
  <Demonhunter> and alzadie
  <Idle_Timmy> tell me a hooker couldn't help.
  <Demonhunter> depends on the hooker
  <Idle Timmy> a hooker with dsl in her hotel room
  <Demonhunter> ohh...
  <Demonhunter> now i could use that
  <Demonhunter> i would be downloading so much porn with her dsl
  connection...
  <Idle_Timmy> "What kind of 'bandwidth' do you get, if you know
  what i mean"
  <Demonhunter> hehe
  <Idle_Timmy> "Depends on your 'hardware', sugar" ;o
  <Idle_Timmy> "So where can i 'plug it in'?"
  <Idle_Timmy> "oooohh, you bring the 'modem', big boy, and i'll
  give you an 'outlet'"
  <Idle_Timmy> "oh yeah, baby, I got your modem RIGHT HERE"
  <Idle_Timmy> *pulls a laptop out of his trenchcoat*
  <Demonhunter> lmao...
  <Idle_Timmy> "now let's see if my 'router' is compatible with
  your 'hub' and we can get some 'peer to peer' action going"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906632
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.578150
text:
  <MadHatter> what you know about people and the way things work
  I could comfortably pass through the hole in my penis


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906632
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.578181
text:
  blondieCA67865: man i'm soo bored!
  RunAFreakingWay: I'm dying because of these people are so
  hilarious. Lemme show you.
  blondieCA67865: mk
  RunAFreakingWay: <reptile-> The first time hypr opened a box
  of Cheerios and looked inside he yelled, "OH WOW! DONUT SEEDS!
  "
  <hypr> wtf are donut seeds
  blondieCA67865: donuts dont even have seeds?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906632
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.578209
text:
  <evad> speaking of fucking sheep..
  <Vod> what would you know about fucking sheep? I bet you don't
  even know about the making the right slits in your wellington
  boots to put their back legs down so they can't get away?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906632
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.578238
text:
  <DTOX> I just got an e-mail about setting up a 3some
  <DTOX> MSN WHORES
  <vermifuge> DO IT DOUG
  <DTOX> they might wonder where "Steve" is when a 30 year old
  web developer shows up and says "Let's fuck"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906633
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.578266
text:
  <missing> a chick walks by, u wish u could sex her
  <missing> but ya standin on the wall like u was poindexter!
  <akaIDIOT> since when is sex a verb?
  <corngrits> i had sex
  <corngrits> isnt that a verb ?
  <ceraph> no, thats a miracle


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906633
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.578294
text:
  docsigma2000: jesus christ man
  docsigma2000: my son is sooooooo dead
  c8info: Why?
  docsigma2000: hes been looking at internet web sites in
  fucking EUROPE
  docsigma2000: HE IS SURFING LONG DISTANCE
  docsigma2000: our fucking phone bill is gonna be nuts
  c8info: Ooh, this is bad. Surfing long distance adds an extra
  $69.99 to your bill per hour.
  docsigma2000: ...!!!!!! FUCK FUCK FUCK
  docsigma2000: is there some plan we can sign up for???
  docsigma2000: cuz theres some cool stuff in europe, but i dun
  wanna pauy that much
  c8info: Sorry, no. There is no plan. you'll have to live with
  it.
  docsigma2000: o well, i ccan live without europe intenet
  sites.
  docsigma2000: but till i figure out how to block it hes sooooo
  dead
  c8info: By the way, I'm from Europe, your chatting long
  distance.
  ** docsigma2000 has quit (Connection reset by peer)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906633
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.578332
text:
  <slope_xb> American one = The Rung
  <slope_xb> er
  <slope_xb> Ring
  <Jeff`> the rung
  <slope_xb> woo i kan type f00
  <Jeff`> rofl
  <Jeff`> that would be an interesting movie
  <SwizzleStick> the ladder or death
  <slope_xb> the Ring, the Rang, the Rung
  <slope_xb> :D
  <SwizzleStick> the top rung kills you
  <Jeff`> "SOMEDAY, I WILL CLIMB THIS LADDER"
  <Jeff`> "ONE RUNG AT A TIME"
  <slope_xb> Ring Rang Rung... almost as bad as Ching Chang
  Chong
  <Jeff`> the movie about a boy who climbs a ladder


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906634
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.578358
text:
  <Nalah> My mother marks the English national exams.  She was
  marking one creative writing paper today, and she got to the
  bottom of the page of one that read "the doctor knelt down
  beside her and raped her" - she turned the page and it
  finished "leg in a bandage".  Hehe.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906634
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.578384
text:
  <Sword_Saint> God, I hate conspiracy theorists
  <Sword_Saint> I almost wish they were right
  <Sword_Saint> so the government would abduct and kill them
  <Sword_Saint> and shut them the fuck up


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906634
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.578411
text:
  <Taco> I fear for my little cousin
  <Taco> he's going to be a loser in school...
  <Taco> you know how I know?
  <Taco> Because he's very much like how I was at that age...
  <Taco> :/


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906634
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.578438
text:
  <@Twitch`> i wish there was a special room in our building
  where guys could go and jerk off on their coffee breaks
  <@Twitch`> that'd be a fuckin stress buster if there ever was
  one
  <@Path> hahahah


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906635
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.578464
text:
  -=- BetaBugz
  [~BetaBugz@cpe-24-197-113-011.spart.sc.charter.com] has joined
  #slashdot
  -=- BetaBugz
  [~BetaBugz@cpe-24-197-113-011.spart.sc.charter.com] has quit #
  slashdot [Quit: Client exiting]
  -=- BetaBugz
  [~BetaBugz@cpe-24-197-113-011.spart.sc.charter.com] has joined
  #slashdot
  -=- BetaBugz
  [~BetaBugz@cpe-24-197-113-011.spart.sc.charter.com] has quit #
  slashdot [Quit: Client exiting]
  -=- BetaBugz
  [~BetaBugz@cpe-24-197-113-011.spart.sc.charter.com] has joined
  #slashdot
  < Chage> revolving door.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906635
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.578490
text:
  (|Chris) CNN (Las Vegas, NV) New York has NOT been bombed.
  David Copperfield has come forward and stated that, "It was
  all just mirrors. I'm sorry that it got out of hand. This was
  just a publicity stunt that went horribly wrong."


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906636
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.578544
text:
  <seekm> this was a call someone had that i was helping them
  with
  <seekm> "is you caps lock key on?"
  <seekm> "i think so, the keyboard is in all capital letters"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906636
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.578567
text:
  <@rs> i just told someone to not hide the ichat-av vu meter
  under another window as it would muffle his voice


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906636
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.578602
text:
  <linnie> Whats wrong Duncie?
  <duncan> not much
  <duncan> im reading is all
  <linnie> Oh!!!! okay leave you to it!
  <duncan> lol
  <duncan> "I'm living in a country i hate with people i dont
  care about in a job im depressed about where the only thing
  that gives me pleasure is practising giving death to others in
  the most painful way possible"
  <linnie> LMAO
  <linnie> where is that from?
  <linnie> I like that
  <duncan> ...
  <duncan> i just made that up
  <duncan> its MY LIFE


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906637
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.578632
text:
  <Mark_Ryan> those of you using mIRC, for a neat trick, hold
  down shift and click the "#wikipedia" button up the top
  <Slowking_Man> I'm betting that closes it.
  <Mark_Ryan> nah it does a 3D animation
  * Parts: neilc (~neilc@61.88.101.19)
  * Parts: squash- (~squash-@051.b.005.mel.iprimus.net.au)
  ("Leaving")
  * Joins: squash- (~squash-@051.b.005.mel.iprimus.net.au)
  <squash-> it works on xchat too


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906637
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.578659
text:
  <@Methical> did anyone else hear about the new dual-proc board
  for low-end AMD processors? it's optimized for playing 80's
  mp3's.
  <@Methical> They call it the Duron-Duron.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906637
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.578687
text:
  <MadScribe> it's called working for a growing company
  <Soopa> work on my growing cock!
  * Soopa has a way with words
  <toNe> and a way with cocks
  <Soopa> yeah that too


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906637
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.578714
text:
  [@Sekt]: "They say that when you play a Microsoft CD backwards
  you can hear demonic voices...
  [@Sekt]: But that's nothing - When you play it forwards it
  installs Windows."


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906638
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.578767
text:
  <GameFang11> He says, and he pulls out sword from the wall
  <GameFang11> he loses 3 HP
  <GameFang11> The Thief attacks Christ
  <Chris-Hotwire-Ashtear> hehehe
  <GameFang11> DAMN! *Chris
  <Drakkor> man
  <Drakkor> you are going to hell


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906639
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.578824
text:
  <goferdude> What's "hockey"?
  <zamros> REALLY YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT HOCKEY IS?
  <Funk> It's like boxing, except it's on ice and there are
  teams


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906639
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.578854
text:
  <@Lathiat> mmm http://www.news.com.au/common/story_page/
  0,4057,6714208%255E15306,00.html
  <evilgoat> who cares?
  <evilgoat> http://www.news.com.au/common/story_page/
  0,4057,6710527%255E1702,00.html
  <evilgoat> now thats news
  <BenZor> rofl, this in an IT/ISP Geek channel
  <BenZor> ipV6 vs Monkeys go on rampage.... and monkeys win.
  <evilgoat> hell yeah


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906639
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.578880
text:
  <zephir> hm
  <zephir> think my moms up
  <Hesh> tell her i want peppers and eggs for breakfast
  <zephir> should i dcc that to you?
  <zephir> ./dcc send hesh peppersandeggs.food


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906640
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.578918
text:
  <spd-dmn> lee: hows the baybee
  <Virtualee> spd-dmn She's great!  Growing so fast!
  <spd-dmn> aw
  <spd-dmn> got any pics?
  <spazzer> has she sprouted appendages yet?
  <KK-> lol
  <spazzer> don't babies grow like potatos?
  <spd-dmn> ahaha
  <spd-dmn> spazzer you're on crack, buddy
  <spazzer> you mean they DON'T?
  <spazzer> they come out with arms and legs?
  <spazzer> shit
  <spazzer> i have a whole new respect for women


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906640
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.578954
text:
  <StarFreeze2> Cyber blackmail artists are shaking down office
  workers, threatening to delete computer files or install
  pornographic images on their work PCs unless they pay a
  ransom, police and security experts said.
  <Duffman> lol
  <Duffman> first, i'd tell em to trash all the fucking files
  they want. it's costing my boss money, not me
  <Duffman> then i'd tell em to put on all the porn they wanted.
  i can always use more
  <Duffman> gotta have something to do at work
  <StarFreeze2> yea lol
  <StarFreeze2> "we will put porn on your computer if you don't
  give us 2k"
  <StarFreeze2> response: hurry and send the porn, i am so
  fucking bored
  <StarFreeze2> second response: lesbian plz, if possible


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906640
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.579004
text:
  [bytraper ] dammit where can I grab porn movies :(
  [OpsuPup  ] umm, try the internet
  [OpsuPup  ] i hear there's lots of porn on there
  [Nemesite ] really?
  [OpsuPup  ] apparently
  [Nemesite ] shit i would never have thought of that


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906641
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.579030
text:
  (%neeley_09) chain letters aren't even trying anymore
  (%neeley_09) "You are definately going to die tonight."
  (%neeley_09) "So repost this before you do!"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906641
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.579064
text:
  <MurderMachine> So did I ever tell you the story of how my
  parents met?
  <DryBones> Nope.
  <MurderMachine> Well, there are two versions I guess.
  <DryBones> How?
  <MurderMachine> The story my Mum tells is: A group of idiots
  pushed her over while ice skating and my Dad heroically went
  over and helped her up.
  <MurderMachine> The story my Dad tells is: He paid a group of
  idiots to go push her over so he could go heroically help her
  up.
  <DryBones> ROFL
  <MurderMachine> I have been paid not to tell her.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906641
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.579094
text:
  <Skipp-XP> ok, I don't have a lot of time but I want to ask a
  quick question
  <Skipp-XP> I have a style writer II printer, and I want to
  connect it to my mac
  <barry> use the included cable
  <Skipp-XP> barry: go fuck yourself
  <Lint> good way to get help retard.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906642
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.579118
text:
  <SPEEDing|VoNK> you cant use knoppix as a server can you?
  <bob> why not? people use windows as one.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906642
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.579148
text:
  <qbpsawk> but try saying
  <qbpsawk> "ID LIKE TO BUY A FAG" in a bar in america
  <qbpsawk> and you see what happens
  <qbpsawk> :D
  <St-Knight> Well if I was the bartender I'd know to give the
  guy a cigarette.
  * slow wants to buy a pack of fags
  <Rivers> i'd like to burn a pack of fags


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906642
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.579179
text:
  <Murr> DrForr, presumably the tank crew *knew* how to swim,
  but not how to escape from a tank with open hatch that had
  turned on its roof before sinking.
  <DrForr> The tank flipped over -then- sank? Now that's rich.
  <arkuat> what is this about?  cisco is building tanks now?
  <Winkola> arkuat: If they do, you can count on a lot of
  drowned newbie net admins.
  <Winkola> "To report a drowning emergency, press 1, and hold
  for 27 minutes."


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906642
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.579203
text:
  <Tikola> i still dont understand how that <3 can mean great or
  better or fabulous or what ever.. greater than


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906643
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.579228
text:
  <GreenJeanz> Go gnaw on your delicious genitals, Squink.
  <Squinky> If I could touch my mouth to my genitals, do you
  think I'd be HERE?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906643
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.579253
text:
  <shadok> CNN: Germany seals Nazi slave labor compensation deal
  <shadok> i think they should just invite all the remaining
  survivors to free
  "compensation camps"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906643
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.579297
text:
  taebaeg: Owen Wilson tried to commit suicide?
  TheZedWord: apparently
  lemonlimeskull: Someone let him watch one of his own films.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906644
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.579327
text:
  <FQ|Dawg> ok so i was messing with one of my schools video
  cameras
  <FQ|Dawg> and i recorded my dick, and i cant erase it off the
  tape
  <FQ|Dawg> what should i do
  <%CLV> tell them you were doing a study on the effects of
  amateur porn on modern society


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906644
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.579369
text:
  * Vesper is now known as CodyB
  <Teku> why the nick change?
  <CodyB> I'm teaching this hot chick how to use IRC
  <xanatos> ...why
  <CodyB> I got grounded for two weeks and I can't call anyone.
  I figured I could talk to her here, at least.
  <CodyB> be cool, I'm teaching her about channels and she might
  come in here
  <xanatos> how did you get grounded
  <CodyB> I locked my sister outside for three hours.
  <xanatos> i bet she didnt like that
  * StacyF has joined #randomshit
  <CodyB> yeah I thought my parents were going to kill me
  <CodyB> oh hey, there you are
  <Teku> So you had sex with your sister on your parents bed and
  they walked in on you? Wow Cody, you're lucky you only got
  grounded for two weeks.
  <StacyF> eeew you sick fuck
  * StacyF has left #randomshit
  <Teku> I know you're going to kill me later, but it was so
  worth it
  <CodyB> you motherfucker


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906644
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.579423
text:
  <Lisa_W> ah, vevery woman's fantasy, 1,000,000s of mindless
  drones doing what she says....and they call her queen
  <Lisa_W> but we'll only want the one that acts like a jerk lol


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906645
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.579448
text:
  (+AeroBob): Ooh! New saying. "A Werthers Original is like anal
  sex..."
  (@Pixie|3554Y): They're both given by grandad? :O
  (+AeroBob): And, of course, both are best served hard.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906645
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.579470
text:
  yuseisays: I got one! I got one!
  BlackDragon412: WHAT?
  yuseisays: What do you call children that are born in whore
  houses?
  yuseisays: BROTHEL SPROUTS
  BlackDragon412: ...
  yuseisays: oh crap, wrong persoin


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906645
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.579495
text:
  *** @pHaT|B33R is now known as @pHaT|ZzZz
  <@JumperXL> later
  <@JumperXL> nite drunkard
  <@ismell> l8
  <@JumperXL> thats irc dedication. smashed off his gord but
  still changes his nick to ZzZz before he passes out.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906647
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.579522
text:
  <@redfox> fuk
  <@redfox> just found out my sisters been in labour for 7 hours
  <@bovineaux> omg ur gonna be a daddy!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906647
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.579553
text:
  * }Phoenix{ has joined #haxxors
  <}Phoenix{> Hey, everybody type in /beep 31337 if you wanna be
  super-leet
  <@Tyreal> Dont do it
  <jackle> /beep 31337
  <redwing> /beep 31337
  <GangstaUO> /beep 31337
  <jackle> gah!!!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906647
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.579594
text:
  <Blackmail> I should get a realdoll
  <Blackmail> imagine me applying for a loan for that from my
  bank "yeah, I need a love doll"
  <tobdude> LOL
  <zerox> I'm sure you could get a realdoll on ebay for half the
  price
  <Blackmail> ew, a used one
  <Blackmail> and not made the way I want it either
  <zerox> is this the one you want Blackmail
  <zerox> http://www.realdoll.com/maledoll1.html
  <aNuBiS-> hahah
  <Blackmail> I want a she-he-doll
  <tobdude>  thats so wrong
  <CanOfSpam> We're long overdue for an Oprah doll
  <Blackmail> UPS won't take anything that heavy
  <CanOfSpam> oh


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906648
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.579624
text:
  <@brosie    > you know what sucks
  <@brosie    > when you shave your ballsack
  <@brosie    > and then get diarrhea
  <@brosie    > and some of the poo gets in a cut you didn't
  know was there
  <@brosie    > and you get gangrene
  <@brosie    > in your nuts


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906648
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.579649
text:
  (phibor) im writing a windows based system called NegrOS
  (evulanjal) lol
  (qdial) that sounds ghetto
  (qdial) what will it do?
  (phibor) nothing, just like true niggers.
  (nexxai) HAHAHAHAHAHA
  (phibor) you give it a job and it will fuck it up..then it
  will smoke your weed and fuck your girlfriend too


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906649
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.579699
text:
  <BorD> What If Saddam Hussein survived the bombing last week,
  but lost a leg... How pissed-off do you think his doubles are?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906649
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.579750
text:
  <xIHaveRicketsx> I almost got killed by some Asian woman
  today.
  <xIHaveRicketsx> Asians should learn how to fucking drive.
  <slamyouinthebutt> But...you're Asian...
  <xIHaveRicketsx> I'm more like a banana: yellow on the
  outside, white on the inside.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906649
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.579776
text:
  <StorDuff> meatball, we should start a channel for n00bs like
  us
  <Meatball> htf do u make a channel


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906650
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.579804
text:
  <DarthFoamy> Ah, unstable connections
  <DarthFoamy> How do I despise thee?
  <DarthFoamy> Let me count the ways!
  <DarthFoamy> 1
  <DarthFoamy> 2
  * DarthFoamy has quit IRC (Quit: Ping timeout)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906650
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.579827
text:
  <Gryphon> any ideas what this error is when i try to ping a pc
  on my LAN: connect: Netowork is unreachable


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906650
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.579853
text:
  <dn> if i cloned myself, changed the y chromosome to an x
  chromosome, and then had sex with her, would it be
  masturbation, or incest?
  <Dareon> I think itd be illegal in 13 states, is what it would
  be.
  <Fentom> -{dn}- I think it would mean you seriously need a
  girlfriend
  <dn> i get the feeling i just earned a new wb


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906651
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.579903
text:
  <Spudsta> my my.....is it just me or does banana always taste
  and feel a bit weird as it's going thru ur digestive system?
  <@`2L> wrong end jess....
  <@`2L> put it in your mouth.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906651
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.579931
text:
  <Fryboy> stormos sister aint that bad
  <stormo> please don't talk about my sister like that
  <ambrness> go back to insulting me and my taste, Fryboy ..
  safer ground
  <stormo> she has more integrity than to go out with some loser
  who spends all his life on IRC
  <Fryboy> ahahahah
  -ambrness- thats why incest is out of the question for him


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906652
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.579957
text:
  fukapuka: im gonna go to my other pc for a bit
  idolcrash: ooh your other PC?
  idolcrash: where you talk dirty to me and act like your dad?
  idolcrash: and I act like some kid in michigan?
  idolcrash: and if that is your dad please don't tell me


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906652
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.579991
text:
  <Helios> Guess what I've got in my hand RIGHT NOW
  <niff|n> "his penis"
  * anavrinny blinks
  <anavrinny> tetris? :P
  <Helios> and my penis
  <Helios> I am rubbing it against the tetris
  <niff|n> lucky you rin!
  <curious> He won't say whether he's a four-square long man or
  a _|_ shaped one.
  <Helios> ____|


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906652
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.580018
text:
  snachodog: should i be able to see that I timed out?
  jestuh: yeah normally you do
  jestuh: efnet tries to hold on to you baby
  jestuh: keep you warm
  jestuh: comfort you
  jestuh: hoping you won't leave it's grasp
  jestuh: ever.
  snachodog: damn clingy girlfriends
  snachodog: er
  snachodog: servers


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906652
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.580045
text:
  <lan_rover> i hate reruns.
  <DAL9000> as do i
  <lan_rover> i wish the tv stations would just say: "We're
  sorry.. we have nothing new to show you.. so please go do
  something productive."


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906653
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.580074
text:
  <Emilia> i didn't think i was going to do better than the 100
  gallons of bean dip for the prison
  <Skiltron> man, you never get good bean dip when you buy by
  the gallon
  <darker> I bet it makes good spackle though
  <Skiltron> it spackles your intestines closed


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906653
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.580097
text:
  Moonli3756 :  my butt looks 100 times better than your face
  Shaboobooboo :  and gets fucked over 10 million times more


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906654
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.580147
text:
  <Farrod> One Saturday afternoon, I was sitting in my lawn
  chair, drinking beer and watching my wife mow the lawn. The
  neighbor lady from across the street was so outraged at this
  that she came over and shouted at me, "You should be hung."
  <Farrod> I calmly replied, "I am. That's why she cuts the
  grass.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906654
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.580172
text:
  * IllIIIllI (yujnfr@24.66.112.129) has joined #suicide
  <IllIIIllI> any slut attention whores here need a man to make
  themselves feel important let me know i can be that guy if you
  aren't ugly/fat
  * IllIIIllI (yujnfr@24.66.112.129) has left #suicide


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906654
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.580197
text:
  * Trust is back from "" (Away for 32330secs (08:58:50))
  <elDiablo> O_O
  * Trust is away "Upgrading Away Script" at Monday September
  15th 2003 05:07:44pm GMT


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906655
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.580278
text:
  <[SoI]{X}CloudsnBunnies{X}> is 1942 a patch of dod or a
  completely sepereate mod?
  <[SoI]{X}CloudsnBunnies{X}> is 1942 a patch of dod or a
  completely sepereate mod?
  <J-0-K-e-R`secksi> .........1942 = different game


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906655
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.580305
text:
  <+MrCuban-> File Server Online Trigger:« @ILOVETHECOCK »
  Sends:«0» Queues:«0/15» MOTD: -= over 75gig of gay porn !!! =-
  I-n-v-i-s-i-o-n
  <@Ostritch-> @ILOVETHECOCK
  <scissors> Hahaha your a gay lover
  « Ostritch- » ?
  « Ostritch- » no i wanted to erm
  « Ostritch- » download porn
  « Ostritch- » for a friend of a friend
  « Ostritch- » who has a gay
  « Ostritch- » cousin
  <scissors> LOL


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906656
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.580334
text:
  * Feren considers quitting his job and starting a small ISP in
  the yukon by strapping wireless access points to grizzly
  bears.
  <JenWolf> That seems only slightly less dangerous than you
  current job.
  <Feren> I suppose.
  * JenWolf can imagine the help desk calls you'd get. "Help, my
  access point ate my little brother."


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906656
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.580368
text:
  <luminosity> No wait... I can do better than that. they should
  develop a
  neural connection so I can sit here and not even
  have to move.
  <martinb> sure. Can it write this requirements spec I'm
  working on, too?
  <luminosity> Why the hell not?
  <luminosity> While it's at it it can do my homework so I can
  concentrate on
  fun stuff.
  <martinb> so get working on it!
  <martinb> no, wait, recusion
  <martinb> damn


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906657
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.580445
text:
  <FHL> oh shit
  <FHL> i was just jacking off and my dad was walking on the
  deck <FHL> i hope he didn't look down through the window :(
  <FHL> the bad part was, after i saw him in the corner of my
  eye on the deck, he came back in and asked if i wanted
  kielbasa for dinner


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906657
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.580473
text:
  <NuttO> I feel bad whenever I run a search on my nick.
  <NuttO> The fact that I feel bad that I'm not on a database of
  IRC quotes makes me feel worse.
  <NuttO> It's a downward spiral.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906657
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.580501
text:
  <reo4k> just type /quit whoever, and it'll quit them from irc
  * luckyb1tch has quit IRC (r`heaven)
  * r3devl has quit IRC (r`heaven)
  * sasopi has quit IRC (r`heaven)
  * phhhfft has quit IRC (r`heaven)
  * blackersnake has quit IRC (r`heaven)
  <ibaN`reo4k[ex]> that's gotta hurt
  <r`heaven> :(


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906657
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.580534
text:
  <Thero> WHAT THE FUCK
  <Thero> i just got yelled at for eating ham
  <Thero> WHY ARE MY PARENTS PISSED ABOUT ME EATING HAM
  <Thero> i didn't eat the ham to begin with
  <Neon-azi> did you eat it on a plane?
  <Thero> no?
  <Neon-azi> did you eat it on a train?
  <Thero> ....
  <|silicon> did you eat it on a bar?
  <wind> did you eat it in a car?
  <hydro> did you eat it in a box?
  <hydro> OR WITH A FOX?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906658
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.580565
text:
  <DmDragon> all my cars are haunted
  <DmDragon> i had one car where the glove compartment would
  keep opening at random times
  <DmDragon> so it opened once and i just finally said "fuck you
  stay open" well the car stalled out the radio turned on and
  off and the flashlights started flashing while the windshield
  wipers started
  <DmDragon> so i slowly reached over and closed it.. then the
  car just went back to normal


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906658
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.580616
text:
  I Concordia I: would you kiss a dude for your life?
  paintballa265: I for one choose death
  I Concordia I: you wouldn't kiss a guy over dying?
  paintballa265: Like what are we talking here
  paintballa265: How you kiss your mom
  paintballa265: or how i do?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906659
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.580645
text:
  mojo: oh my god that was the greatest ever
  mojo: UPS guy was at my door delivering some stuff to me
  mojo: and this guy from across the street was on the sidewalk
  talking to him about a cell phone delivery or some nonsense
  mojo: and the UPS guy says "crazy foreigner from across the
  street keeps bothering me, i don't even think he has a house"
  mojo: "he probably drives a taxi because he can't get a real
  job"
  mojo: and i smiled at him and said "yea. nothing at all like
  driving a UPS truck." *SLAM*


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906659
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.580676
text:
  <GamInTheCity> ...why are lyrics to Komm Susser Tod in the
  topic?
  <skyknyt> to be as depressing as possible for when Shel comes
  in, of course
  <GamInTheCity> Oh, of course
  <skyknyt> torturing people when they're down is a sign of
  respect and friendship
  <skyknyt> much like gouging expletives on the side of
  another's vehicle with your key.
  <GamInTheCity> You mean Friendship Marks?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906659
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.580717
text:
  <Rosipam> (is glad she has AOL now)
  <Rosipam> ^_^
  ...
  <Zack`> Rosipam?
  <Rosipam> Hello.
  <Zack`> When did you get AOL?
  <Rosipam> A few weeks ago.
  <Zack`> What did you have before that?
  <Rosipam> Microsoft Internet Explorer.
  <Zack`> Ah
  <Zack`> What do you like about AOL?
  <Rosipam> It's faster.
  <Zack`> Wow.
  <Zack`> What was your old Internet connection?
  *** Rosipam (quickchat@=RWNRPD119P.ipt.aol.com) Quit
  (Connection reset by peer)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906660
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.580743
text:
  <Black> Half-Life II!
  * Black falls to his knees.
  * enderak unzips
  * Black worships
  <WizzoMaFizzo> :S


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906660
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.580770
text:
  <Giuslaien> hi!!
  <Giuslaien> I am dj of the brasil I have you vary music with
  Latin interferences.
  <Giuslaien> do I like to change music, some kindred dj of
  changing music?
  <Giuslaien> are you of where?
  <Giuslaien> which your name?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906660
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.580796
text:
  twinturbo: hmm, why is my name green on the right?
  Swinny0: coz it's teelin you that's YOU
  barnz: to show which one is you
  twinturbo: like i don't know?
  barnz: indeed
  Swinny0: some don't!!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906661
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.580820
text:
  <Ron> Just for the hell of it the other day, I went into Word
  and typed out the alphabet with a whole bunch of fonts...then
  practiced copying them so I could handwrite in like, seven
  different fonts.
  <Fire3n3rgy> ...
  <Fite3n3rgy> go masturbate or something


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906661
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.580846
text:
  <bus> what can I help you with, xorg?
  <xorg> well
  <xorg> when uncle daddy touches my bathing suit
  <xorg> i get all tingly
  <xorg> but the bible says NO


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906661
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.580871
text:
  <badelia> oops, i did ctrl+n instead of shift+n
  <tt> wow, what does shift+n do
  <badelia> uh, makes a capital n...
  <tt> O...


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906662
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.580969
text:
  <ShadiZar> get your happy ass over here then
  <ShadiZar> i could use a good hard... well, anything
  <`KArmA> oh sure. . . its always karma come do this for me. .
  come out to texas karma, fuck me like a beast karma, oh harder
  karma
  <`KArmA> what about *MY* needs goddamnit!?!?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906662
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.580995
text:
  <epmo> now can u please unban me so i can ask a real question?
  :)
  <DAL9000> To remove your ban, please submit the request for
  ban removal form(FRM-4391B-R5) with all neccessary materials,
  including passport photograph and notorized statement of
  intent to abide by rules, and your ban will be reviewed for
  removal within 4 to 8 business days. In the meantime all
  inquiries may be directed to www.google.com.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906663
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.581016
text:
  (pedxing) it takes twenty-five muscles to frown, and only
  twelve to punch some wiseass in the mouth.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906663
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.581045
text:
  <Molson> Yeah...Good idea
  <Jouka> Hell bitch the wieght would drop like hell
  <Molson> I see it now:   Ultra-Diet, lose over 50 pounds in a
  month
  <Molson> Course no where on the bottle tell them they are
  ingesting tape worm eggs.
  <Jouka> Bwahahaha
  <Cindy728> um.....ew....


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906664
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.581102
text:
  <waffle> <+SKubber> as if I'd remember all my one night
  stands. <+SKubber> hehehe maybe I COULD remember them by smell
  <waffle> #bearcave
  <Proz512> He remembers by the smell of one's colon


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906664
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.581143
text:
  <lrvick> whoa
  <lrvick> i just found a usb magstrip reader
  <lrvick> i never knew i had
  <lrvick> i wonder if it works like a keyboard...
  <lrvick> %B4744740232448132^VICK/LANCE R^
  1506101000000000087800878000000?;4744740232258132=
  15061010000000000878?
  <lrvick> well
  <lrvick> damn
  <lrvick> apparently it does
  <Science> What did we just read?
  <lrvick> no comment
  <Science> CC info, gotcha
  <ThantiK> lrvick...
  <ThantiK> you swiped a VISA...
  <ThantiK> 4744 is VISA start code for credit cards.
  <ThantiK> A bank of america one, specifically.
  <ThantiK> Might wanna change that now, lol - all of us
  probably have IRC logging turned on.  You just threw your
  debit card info into all of our machines.
  <Science> WELL NO ONE WOULD HAVE KNOWN IF YOU HADN'T SAID IT
  MAN


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906664
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.581195
text:
  RobLuckettX: i wonder if the world took some massive vote, if
  we could exile Bush from America
  Masqueradeuk: some people like him
  RobLuckettX : like a sort of giant UN Weakest Link
  RobLuckettX : hosted by Thatcher
  Masqueradeuk : "George Bush you are the Weakest Link -
  Goodbye!"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906665
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.581224
text:
  <ChafedNut> I just downloaded the internet
  <ChafedNut> it's pretty fly
  <Batt0usai> Chafednut: can you burn it on a cd for me please
  <ChafedNut> I will try...it may have some copyright
  protections
  <Batt0usai> if you could fit it in a floppy it would be better
  actually
  <Batt0usai> try zipping it
  <ChafedNut> ok


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906665
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.581250
text:
  ClonaZjeveni5: It isn't a biased opinion
  ClonaZjeveni5: its true
  xenotwuz: I'm thinking your opinion on biased opinions is
  biased.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906665
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.581272
text:
  Scarface8393: i was just looking at the bottle of cooking oil
  because im making spaghetti and i was wondering. what is extra
  virgin? is that like never ever gonna get laid?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906666
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.581370
text:
  <Mad|Mungkee> I was playing everquest once and this guy killed
  himself with a shotgun and broadcasted it in East Commons
  <Mad|Mungkee> pretty sad
  <brasshorse> did his elf die


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906667
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.581397
text:
  <SSJ3_Goku> you fucking nerds should really get a fucking life
  god like really go and get laid cuz you nerds really need it
  to let you know what reality is!!!!
  <Hsu> this coming from a guy calling himself ssj3_goku
  <Chimpbot> point, match, set


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906667
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.581449
text:
  <LittleBunny32> this girl on okcupid.com has six things she
  could never do without as: Sex, love, music, movies, dildo,
  water and air
  <LittleBunny32> notice air is last
  <RenaissanceGamer> i never did like people on this that took
  it THAT literatly
  <RenaissanceGamer> because food would have to be up there too
  <RenaissanceGamer> and shelter
  <LittleBunny32> haha I'd put like oxygen, carbon, hydrogen,
  phosphorus, sodium, potassium
  <RenaissanceGamer> i have always been partial to those six
  myself


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906668
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.581533
text:
  <H|G> wo da hells dat
  <MoonHawk> whats balls?
  <Marcus`> you don't know what balls are?
  <H|G> no
  <MoonHawk> Marcus`  no i dont
  <H|G> we dont have it here
  <Marcus`> you guys don't have balls in france?
  <H|G> i guess not
  <_PhAnTaSm> I think they only have bawls in north america.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906669
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.581564
text:
  <PigsCantFly> SO MY MUM WAS LIKE "CLEAN YOUR ROOM" AND IM LIKE
  "NO WAY FACIST" IM THE PUNKEST
  <@K0ffing> THEN I SAID I'M 12 NOW MUM I CAN STAY OUT AS LONG
  AS I LIKE AND SHE SAID GO TO YOUR ROOM SO I STABBED HER WITH
  MY LINKIN PARK PEN
  <PigsCantFly> D00D MY MUM SAID SHE DOESNT WANT ME SKATING IN
  THE HOUSE BUT I WAS LIKE NO WAY HITLER AND I KICK-FLIPPED TO
  INDY GRIND ON THE CAT


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906669
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.581593
text:
  <philtwo> mmm... smoked clams in a can
  <philtwo> only get to feast upon this delicacy when the wife's
  not around
  <PhrkOnLsh> women, eh?
  <philtwo> indeed
  <philtwo> some men cheat on their wives in their absense... I
  eat clams in a can


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906669
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.581644
text:
  <strangeintp> anyone know what version ships with latest free
  Mangina distro?
  <mpyne> bwahahaha
  <pahli_bar> lol
  <mpyne> s/Mangina/Mandriva/ maybe?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906670
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.581689
text:
  *** panda sets mode: +vvv ecs Kitsune Warskull
  *** Goonigoogoo sets mode: +vvv Beersplurgleywurgelywoo chris
  [sleep] JonesSoda
  <afropik> I don't liek where this is going
  *** panda sets mode: +m
  *** afropik is now known as WTFTurnItOff


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906670
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.581717
text:
  <archaios> I WAS A VIRGIN TIL 21
  <poonTheta> archaios i thought you are 20 :|
  <archaios> poonTheta: I am still a virgin
  <archaios> I expect to get laid next year


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906671
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.581750
text:
  <brently> i want a girl
  <enigmiac> me too
  <brently> a good girl
  <enigmiac> we'll see
  <brently> a partner
  <enigmiac> good girls are hard to fuck
  <enigmiac> er,
  <enigmiac> find FIND!
  <enigmiac> I MEANT TO SAY FIND
  <brently> mmhmm


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906671
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.581777
text:
  <+phlange> i said 'dhcp' and the tech support guy started to
  cry and go 'i hate my job i hate my job i hate my job'


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906671
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.581804
text:
  <Sohcahtoa> When I first saw that image, I said "This is so
  obviously photoshopped.  NOBODY has a nutsack that hangs THAT
  low."
  <Yosh|Surf> wait
  <Yosh|Surf> how did my girlfriends picture get back into
  discussion?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906673
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.581878
text:
  <h0ward> it began with the forging of the great servers
  <h0ward> three were given to the geeks, immortal, wisest, and
  fairest of all beings
  <h0ward> seven to teh jock-lords, great football players and
  craftsmen of the locker halls
  <h0ward> and nine, nine servers were given to the race of men
  whom above all else desired PRON
  <h0ward> within the servers was a power that could govern each
  class
  <h0ward> but they were all of them deceived
  <h0ward> for another server was made
  <h0ward> stile, the deceiver, forged in secret a master server
  to control all others
  <h0ward> one server to rule them all
  <h0ward> one by one the people of the servers fell to the
  great power of the master server
  <h0ward> but there were some
  <h0ward> who resisted
  <h0ward> a great alliance of geeks and jocks marched against
  the fanboys of stile
  <h0ward> and on the slopes of blogwars
  <h0ward> they fought for the freedom of good, and only good
  pron
  <h0ward> AAAHHH
  <h0ward> FAPFAPFAPFAPFAPFAPFAP
  <h0ward> victory was near
  <h0ward> but the master server could not be stopped
  <h0ward> the dark lord stile killed brunot son of brunob
  <h0ward> and as luck should so have it
  <h0ward> brunob cut the wiring of the master server
  <h0ward> stile the enemy of good, decent pron of the earth
  <h0ward> was wanked out of existence


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906673
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.581905
text:
  <spider> sigh, i gotta go find my alcholic truck again, bbl
  <FRiZzO> oh yeah she didn't come home with you last night?
  <spider> negative


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906673
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.581931
text:
  <SuperKing> 90% of men kiss their wife goodbye when they leave
  the house.
  <SuperKing> The rest kiss their house goodbye when they leave
  the wife.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906674
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.581978
text:
  <JayNiN> So yeah, guys, my dad and I had a big arguement last
  night...It's actually pretty fucking awkward.
  <SimCard> Yeah? Tell us about.
  <JayNiN> Heh, you guys aren't going to believe this...but
  anyways.
  <JayNiN> So last night, my sister was trying to get her AOL
  connection shut off (yes, I know...who the fuck still uses
  AOL?)
  <JayNiN> and I decide to go to the regional chatrooms
  <JayNiN> 10 minutes in the chatroom, some random guy IMs me
  and is like "ASL"
  <JayNiN> so I fuck around with the guy saying "19/F/WY"
  <JayNiN> The guy starts tripping out and is like "omg, I'm
  from Wyoming!"
  <JayNiN> and so I'm like "Oh, really? What part?"
  <JayNiN> the guy goes "Cheyenne"...I shit myself. I'm from
  Cheyenne!
  <JayNiN> Out of nowhere, the guy asks for my phone number...so
  I was feeling a bit mischievious and I wanted to have my
  sister talk to him and then we would just prank the guy.
  <JayNiN> Well, I give the guy my number and out of nowhere he
  goes..."JAKE!? What the fuck!?"
  <JayNiN> I trip out and I'm like "Who the hell are you? And
  how do you know my name/number!?"
  <JayNiN> and he goes "GET THE FUCK HOME RIGHT NOW!"
  <JayNiN> It was my dad...


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906674
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.582008
text:
  <Apollo-> ok, now this is messed up...I work on the 8th floor,
  I got on the elevator on 1, I was the only person on.  I
  farted, the elevator stops at 2 and someone gets on and rides
  all the way up to 6
  <TenBaseT> I hate that.
  <TenBaseT> did you try to cover?
  <Apollo-> No, but I thought about it
  <Apollo-> he had a bag of burger king food, I almost said
  "Man, your food reeks"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906674
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.582034
text:
  <Jingoro`> I dont wana see pictures of brazilian santaclause
  <Jingoro`> he probably has roms in his sack


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906675
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.582064
text:
  <Chobes> You there, Mr. Mercman2000?
  <Mercman2000> I'm talking with a chick.  Piss off.
  <Chobes> Text recognition AI has gotten so advanced.
  <Mercman2000> This is ME.  Mercman2000 you little Chobesey
  fuck.  I am talking with a chick, this is the first non-postal
  related female contact I have gotten in for fucking never, so
  I don't care if your pubes are on fire and you need tech spit
  to douse the flames, whatever it is, IT CAN FUCKING WAIT.
  <Trunks> o.o
  <Chobes> omj poynt taken


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906675
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.582093
text:
  <trccccc> virus: go fuck a leprocohn
  <brucel33t> I bet they give good head
  <trccccc> maybe he will give you his bag of gold
  <Reul> or what's in his sack


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906675
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.582118
text:
  (Mobb-Deep) still using AO hell?
  (tori_anus) no, shabbo.. it's just one of those aol shell
  accounts so i can be ereet


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906675
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.582142
text:
  <EiNHanDeR MK II> does anyone find it peculiar that the winner
  of the running olympics is black, and the white guys always
  win rifle and accuracy competitions?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906676
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.582167
text:
  <@Trouble`> what sport could see six chinamen in a maiden and
  a nightwatchman with a duck?
  <@Trouble`> Hint: _ _ _ _ _ _ _
  <cheeks`> japscat


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906676
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.582222
text:
  <@cs_weasel> my latest viagra spam subject line: "adolph"
  < ponds`zombie> ein reich, ein volk, ein schlongpill


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906677
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.582285
text:
  Rann XXV: Geez. Story on "Ripley's Believe It Or Not" about
  two guys that tried to invent a sport called "parabungee", a
  combination of skydiving and bungee jumping. And, gee, one of
  them got hurt when it all fucked up. Right now, God is STILL
  thinking, "Why the hell isn't that fucker dead?", while Darwin
  spins in his grave.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906677
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.582321
text:
  #slackware on efnet 4-22-04 12:57 am EST -5.00
  <mfbian_> how will you compare slackware and freebsd
  <Cheethoe> apples and oranges
  <mfbian_> fair enough
  <`justin`> slackware = for people that have been molested
  freebsd = people that want to molest their mothers
  <`justin`> openbsd = for people that probably wont ever get
  molested
  <`justin`> netbsd = molesting of all minorities, and cock
  asians
  <mfbian_> how about gentoo
  <`justin`> I dont know ask khai
  --> biggy (something@1Cust26.tnt1.columbus.in.da.uu.net) has
  joined #slackware
  <`justin`> oh wait I do know
  <mfbian_> you don't know anything
  --> supergoad
  (~supergoad@pcp08611785pcs.waldrf01.md.comcast.net) has joined
  #slackware
  <`justin`> mfbian_: gentoo = people that want to molest their
  mothers, fathers, uncles, aunts, sisters, brothers, dogs, but
  can't get it up


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906677
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.582405
text:
  <OneiWilly> i hate games that are always go get the red key
  <OneiWilly> open the red door then get the blue key
  <delay> yea
  <Auger> yeah, i mean, what the fuck
  <delay> thats why i didnt play resident evil
  <delay> it was horrible like that
  <OneiWilly> yea but there were zombies
  <delay> I was like "damn i'd hate to live here and have to go
  to the bathroom"
  * delay runs down the hall, grabs the blue gem, opens door
  one, runs back to get SHIELD EMBLEM makes it to the bathroom
  door... wets himself
  <Auger> no you pee inside the emblem and it opens up a secret
  passage


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906678
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.582511
text:
  <Domsey> Woah, I got the weirdest moment of my entire life
  this morning
  <bender> what happened?
  <Domsey> you know, there was a party at my neighbours' last
  night
  <bender> yeah, you've been fucking drunk..
  <Domsey> you've been there, too?
  <bender> sure...
  <Domsey> well, you see i can't remember anything
  <Domsey> but this morning I woke up in my bed, and there was
  my mom lying next to me.
  <bender> wtf...?
  <Domsey> That's exactly what i thought
  <Domsey> So, my mom got up instantly when i woke up, smiled at
  me and said "U're so much better than your dad is." then she
  left the room
  <bender> OMFG!!!
  <bender> you didnt do that! TELL ME IT WASNT LIKE THAT!!! TELL
  ME YOU'RE A DUMBASS LIAR!!!
  <Domsey> no, i'm not lying
  <bender> OMG!!!
  <Domsey> but it turned out she was playing a trick on me.
  Paycheck for coming home late, all drunk.
  <bender> ...
  <bender> your mom's such a freak. o.O


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906678
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.582557
text:
  <DooD> and for the record i worship kim -_-
  <``Erik> kim? one of my playtoys is named kim
  <DooD> you name your blowup dolls?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906679
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.582643
text:
  ·Kersus· ... - ..- .--. .. -.. ..-. ..- -.-. -.- .. -. --. .--
  .... --- .-. . ...
  ·cronO· morse code?
  ·Sudhra· .. / -.- -. --- .-- / .-- .... .- - / -.-- --- ..-
  .----. .-. . / ... .- -.-- .. -. --. / -.. --- -. - / ..- -.
  -.. . .-. . ... - .. -- .- - . / .. -
  ·Kersus· .- -. -.. .. .-- --- ..- .-.. -.. .-- .- .-.. -.-
  ..-. .. ...- . .... ..- -. -.. .-. . -.. -- .. .-.. . ...
  --..-- .- -. -.. .. .-- --- ..- .-.. -.. .-- .- .-.. -.- ..-.
  .. ...- . .... ..- -. -.. .-. . -.. -- --- .-. .
  ·iggz· I can't believe you two are ACTUALLY talking in morse
  code


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906679
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.582687
text:
  [@Eric^^] win [Eminem - Rap Attack - 16 - Eminem - Forget
  About Dre (Live From SNL Feat. Eminem).mp3] - (3m55s/192kbps)
  amp
  [@nacitar] Rap Attack! OmG
  @nacitar gets rapped on by a crow


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906680
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.582780
text:
  (tobyl) It's damn hard to schedule these things, and we're
  hitting major plot.
  (tobyl) Not to mention my character just went up two levels.
  (Fetch) wow
  (Fetch) what'd you kill?
  (Sancho) the DM


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906680
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.582882
text:
  <Bandit-> you guys are idiots >_< - what i said is true
  <Bandit-> the difference in modems now is negligable
  <Arcuivie> negligable? is that even a word?
  <Bandit-> actually yes


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906681
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.582979
text:
  <entropy> goin to get my tatt touched up here in about 10 min
  <j0shua> what kind of tatt?
  <entropy> 'entropy' on my back in apple ][e chars


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906681
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.583027
text:
  <SaberRider> Yoss, you might be an IRC Adict if you sneak to
  the computer in the middle of the night to get in more IRC
  time.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906681
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.583078
text:
  <Knuckleskin> i know someone here who was sent to prison cos
  he had nunchucks in the boot of his car
  <Swiss_Cheese> holy shit, over there ur cars have boots?!
  <Swiss_Cheese> ours have wheels


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906682
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.583182
text:
  <Mr_Vain> I'd rather have an admirer than a stalker any day
  <Phrim> what's the difference, Bonz? :-)
  <Mr_Vain> a stalker doesn't blink when they look at you
  <Mr_Vain> it's very unnerving


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906682
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.583244
text:
  <Nanako> The only uniforms they had were too big
  <Nanako> So I have like a 3xl jacket
  <Nanako> it goes almost down to my knees.
  <Nanako> and the pants kept falling down my hips and I had to
  keep pulling them up.
  * Nanako CLEARLY ISN'T FAT ENOUGH
  <Tails> So you've got the gangsta UPS look going on
  <Nanako> fo sho
  <Nanako> all up in yo grill with mah package


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906682
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.583292
text:
  <ItBurn|mw> yay tescd cerazeyhes
  <ItBurn|mw> crashed
  <Celestar|xchat> ItBurn|mw: dude how did you mistype like
  THAT?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906683
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.583351
text:
  <dudeforev> hehe
  <dudeforev> my mom said what r u wathing
  <dudeforev> i said pohrn
  <dudeforev> she said well dont make a mess
  <dudeforev> hehe
  <[0sec]Hero_Man> hahahahaa
  <[0sec]Hero_Man> your mom sounds cool


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906683
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.583410
text:
  <Sugadon> sup
  <Sugadon> i'm in houston
  <GaBe-33> houston !?
  <GaBe-33> what you doing in texas !?
  <Sugadon> honeymoon
  <drunkers> you came on mirc on your honeymoon?
  <drunkers> the sex that bad?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906683
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.583467
text:
  <idlerakefighter> What's the deal with Ovaltine
  <Sarah> the cup's round :(
  <Sarah> the container's round :(
  <Sarah> why isn't it roundtine?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906684
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.583531
text:
  <DiamonDie> dutch people can't be named ben.
  <bool> DiamonDie, why not?
  <DiamonDie> because they can't!
  <bool> they did!
  <bool> even a mobile phone company is called Ben
  <DiamonDie> so you're a mobile phone, too?
  <DiamonDie> it would be quite odd to be a mobile phone. you'd
  get fingered all the time.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906684
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.583620
text:
  * TPEGrunge is away: -(be back in 12 years)- since -(01:54)-
  pager -(off)-
  * TPEGrunge is back: from -(be back in 12 years)- gone -
  (626wks 1day 6secs)-


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906684
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.583668
text:
  <xenophile> ugh plane has a flat fire, we're going to be very
  very late
  <@jwz> make sure they check the heat tiles too


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906685
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.583717
text:
  <EssKay> i don't want to have fucking poles in my underwear,
  man.
  <Rjx> that joke went so far over your head it got hijacked and
  flown into a major landmark


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906685
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.583808
text:
  <@J^raxis> Some people have some weird fetishes. Which is
  fine. Then they take photos of them, which is not.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906685
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.583868
text:
  <b1u3> i know the movie was written by a guy who knew nothing
  about computers, who wanted to make a movie about computers
  <b1u3> but it has its points
  <daenonok> should have frat brothers over and watch hackers
  the movie, and every time they make shit up, you drink a shot
  <daenonok> you'd be passed out in twenty mins
  <b1u3> yea but they got that worldwide virus on one floppy
  disk, and it had a fucking sidekick virus to distract people
  <b1u3> you got people these days like 'yo i just pulled these
  leet kiddie sploits together into one bad mutha, the fifth cd
  is half burned!'


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906686
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.583919
text:
  <@apexthief> Okay we have taco tuesday I need other food day
  of the week ideas
  <@AltRhombu> taco wednesday
  <@AltRhombu> taco thursday


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906686
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.584017
text:
  <Jimmy> lisa, i'm having a bad day. wanna get naked on cam?
  <Lisa> hahaha
  <Jimmy> i hope hahaha is spanish for yes


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906687
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.584064
text:
  <Veen> if someone said they were 50% gay, would that probably
  insinuate that they are bi?
  <quatoria> It would insinuate they want you to blow them.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906687
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.584108
text:
  (Mac01) kodEblak: I wanna see your naked ass
  (kodEblak) mac: the closest thing you'll get to my ass..is me
  farting in your direction.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906687
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.584156
text:
  <Cl0ckwork> i hate it when explorer crashes, losing my system
  tray, and irc is minized to it
  <slick> I hate when I kick a dog and then the owner see's me
  and I have to kill him


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906687
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.584205
text:
  <czth> cue jokes about dyslexic agonostic insomniac that
  stayed up all night wondering if there was a dog


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906688
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.584289
text:
  <|Wolf|> So I meet this chick, right
  <|Wolf|> And she's like "what do you want?"
  <|Wolf|> So I say, "I wanna stick my little wood elf in your
  forest!"
  <|Wolf|> And she's like "Die Fetcher!"
  <|Wolf|> and I'm like "woah, bitch! calm yo' ho ass down!"
  <|Wolf|> and i stab her in the face
  <|Wolf|> and she dies
  <|Wolf|> Then I'm like "told ya slut, don't mess with dis"
  <|Wolf|> and i take her clothes and her money and leave her
  ass in a gutter
  <|Wolf|> but instead of pawning the shit, i end up trying it
  on
  <|Wolf|> and thats the story of how i got this cool green
  skirt in Morrowind


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906688
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.584358
text:
  <@kmad> its fun as hell
  <@kmad> you know what, thats a bad simile
  <@kmad> because i would assume hell isn't very fun


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906689
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.584461
text:
  <Graeme> yeah, don't be nasty. my grandad died in a
  concentration camp......!
  <Graeme> he fell out a guard tower. broke his neck


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906689
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.584556
text:
  <EFX> is it strange to peel pieces of skin off your cock?
  <EFX> am I shedding so my cock will grow bigger?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906689
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.584609
text:
  |MallBrat[essay]| :"I remember the first time I jacked off. I
  thought I invented it. I looked down at my handful of junk and
  thought, 'I'm gonna be rich.''


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906690
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.584735
text:
  <JohnDough> man being an athiest is so awesome, as long as you
  don't tell anybody
  <JohnDough> i testified against my stepmom (whom i hate) in a
  trial today
  <Forlorn> what did she do?
  <JohnDough> nothing
  <JohnDough> but the jury sure as hell thinks she did


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906690
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.584801
text:
  <Whammo> I lost my virginity to a ham sandwich
  <WeblionX> That's not losing your virginity.
  <Whammo> baloney


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906691
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.584857
text:
  <Altoid> patience, young skywalker
  <DeX`> but that leia bitch wont put out!
  <DeX`> shes got those huge danishes on her ears to hang
  onto....
  <Altoid> mmmm
  <Altoid> danish
  <Altoid> you fuck her, I'll eat the ears


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906691
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.584904
text:
  Sean: Yeah I thought of it while I was getting a snack.
  Jay: Snacks, is there anything they can't do?
  Sean: Umm... I was going to say provide sexual pleasure, but
  I've heard you can have sex with banana peels.
  Jay: brb


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906691
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.585010
text:
  <Fustard> i dont understand this commercial
  <Fustard> "SOBE YOURSELF"
  <Fustard> WHY WONT THE GOD DAMN DOOR OPEN
  <orion> because that guy was in sandlot
  <orion> and his career sucks so much even cold storage doors
  won't open for him


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906692
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.585067
text:
  <Mithandir> it's interesting how much you can tell about the
  designers of a product by looking at the end result
  <Mithandir> for instance I can clearly tell that whomever
  thought it was a good idea to have "exit program" and "suspend
  computer" buttons on a keyboard didn't have cats


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906692
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.585114
text:
  <Jackal>: So I went over to my hippie neighbor's house and
  asked for a pot holder, he went inside and came out with a
  sandwich bag...... note to self new best friend.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906693
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.585217
text:
  <felix> that raid card is gonna saturate that machine
  <felix> that's like giving a chihuahua a fire hydrant enema.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906693
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.585384
text:
  <LicknDrgn> I dunno, I haven't used a stock HSF in one of my
  machines since P200 days
  <LicknDrgn> Which probably accounts for the fact I've got a
  cold CPU most days and fuck all else to my name :)
  <LicknDrgn> Then again, the drug addict and alcoholic phases
  probably don't help either.
  <LicknDrgn> Still, at least I can play video games drunk and
  stoned with the heater on :P
  <LicknDrgn> And really, isn't that what's important in life?
  <LicknDrgn> ...
  <LicknDrgn> I wish I had a heater :(


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906694
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.585467
text:
  <ori0n> why did you name yourself after a video file?
  <zorack> hehe
  <avi-> because i'm long hardcore and take forever to download


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906694
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.585524
text:
  <Offline> i still cant bleave people dont know what a
  fudgepacker is
  <Log> I do, Zack
  <Log> my friend's fiancee is a fudgepacker :o
  <`Zerp> they work at candy factoryies right log
  <Log> HE PACKS FUDGE AT THE COLORADO FUDGE THINGY
  * Offline pounds his head on his desk


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906694
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.585569
text:
  *** WD_40 is now known as Memory_Leak
  <Memory_Leak> hmm... I could become a faulty breast
  augmentation and change to Mamory_Leak


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906695
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.585650
text:
  <Trippin^Chick> it wouldnt hurt to talk u know
  <Trippin^Chick> i know coz i talk all the time
  <Hash_Pipe> i want to ask you a bunch of questions and i want
  to have them answered immediately
  <Trippin^Chick> really?
  <Hash_Pipe> who is your daddy and what does he do?
  * Trippin^Chick shrugs
  <Trippin^Chick> can i lie?
  <Hash_Pipe> im a cop you idiot
  <Trippin^Chick> cool
  <Trippin^Chick> really?
  <Hash_Pipe> stop it!
  <Hash_Pipe> who is your daddy and what does he do?
  <Hash_Pipe> i want to ask you a bunch of questions and i want
  to have them answered immediately
  <Trippin^Chick> Hash_Pipe...has any1 ever had the heart to
  tell u that ur boring?
  <Hash_Pipe> stop whining......
  <Trippin^Chick> who was whining?
  <Hash_Pipe> stop it!
  <Hash_Pipe> stop whining......
  <Hash_Pipe> i hope you leave enough room for my fist because
  im going to ram it into your stomach
  <Trippin^Chick> ur not a very nice person r u Hash?
  <Hash_Pipe> stop whining......


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906695
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.585716
text:
  <OreoTZA> ./ignore #k-rad
  <OreoTZA> whoa, i wonder if you can actually do that
  <OreoTZA> holdon, I'm gonna try
  <OreoTZA> ok, hello?
  <OreoTZA> HELLo????
  <OreoTZA> anyone seen this?
  <OreoTZA> LOL!!!!!! IT FUCKING WORKED
  <OreoTZA> holy shit
  <Dawgyman> josh
  <OreoTZA> SHIT I SEE DAWG, it didn't work


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906695
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.585779
text:
  <Jesus> a black baby died and went to heaven
  <Jesus> and god looked at him and said, "you've earned your
  wings"
  <Jesus> and gave the black baby wings
  <Jesus> the black baby look up and said, "am i really an angel
  now"
  <Jesus> and God looked down and said,
  <Jesus> "HELL NAW, NIGGA, YOU A BAT"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906695
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.585842
text:
  * byra bounces like a retard
  <Argent-> Are you listening to something bouncy?
  <byra> nope.
  <byra> im listening to the hum of computers
  <Argent-> Well, that always perks me up.
  <Argent-> The comforting whirr of fans, the faint ozone
  smell.. ah, I love that new computer smell you get when you
  buy a new case.
  <Argent-> The slick texture of anti-static bags..
  <Argent-> the clink of mounting hardware
  <countzero> -stop- you're turning me on!
  <countzero> ooh la la.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906696
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.586071
text:
  <somebodyelse> The original message was received at Wed, 20
  Nov 2002 21:07:42 -0600
  <somebodyelse> from miaqfl-as-2-ip-6.atlantic.net
  [209.208.60.37]
  <somebodyelse>    ----- The following addresses had permanent
  fatal errors -----
  <somebodyelse> <email@domain.com>
  <somebodyelse>     (reason: 550 5.7.1 <email@domain.com>...
  relay attempt failed)
  <somebodyelse>    ----- Transcript of session follows -----
  <somebodyelse> ... while talking to mail.seekeywest.com.:
  <somebodyelse> >>> RCPT To:<email@domain.com>
  <somebodyelse> <<< 550 5.7.1 <email@domain.com>... relay
  attempt failed
  <somebodyelse> 550 5.1.1 <email@domain.com>... User unknown
  <somebodyelse> why do i get that?
  <dnky> because, no one would bother to email
  "email@domain.com"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906696
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.586126
text:
  <BORGTriv> [BORGTriv] - Zmannnn Got the last one...
  <BORGTriv> [BORGTriv] - 224. what is soccer star pele's real
  name?
  <BORGTriv> [BORGTriv] - Here's a hint: --s-n ------- --
  --s---e---
  <daSinga> DAAAAAAAAAAAAAMN!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906699
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.586205
text:
  <sd> I was once trying to explain to an exec why his account
  would never be absolutely secure.
  <sd> Me: "If somebody wants your account information badly
  enough, he's going to get it. He doesn't have to hack the
  system, he can just get it from you."
  <sd> Exec: "That's crazy, I'd never give anyone my password."
  <sd> Me: "Imagine you come home and find someone's broken in.
  He's got a gun to your daughter's head, and he tells you he's
  going to shoot in ten seconds if you don't give him your
  password. What would you do?"
  <sd> Exec: [long pause] ... Which daughter?
  <sd> To this day I still don't know if he was joking. But I no
  longer use that example.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906699
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.586258
text:
  <Raiden> I've been seeing a lot more quotes on bash that are
  ones that have been up on the site for a long time. It's like
  the mods don't even bother and just click random quotes to
  add. HEAR THAT MODS, RANDOMLY CLICK ON THE BIG HUGE TEXT YOU
  SEE HERE


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906699
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.586307
text:
  * deVoca wonders how many American here know on what date the
  Civil War started and ended.
  <Bell_of_Ygg> deV, I can't remember when-I can only remember
  how, why and what.
  <The_Freakazoid> That means bell can remember it in the ass,
  for love, with a phone. But not who did it or when it
  happened.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906700
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.586360
text:
  (pantherqs) isnt there some gradeschool playground you should
  be stalking or something?
  <Gusto> oh buddy
  <Gusto> there are TWO, count em, TWO grade schools right
  beside my apartment
  <Gusto> little jewish preschoolers running around
  <Gusto> one day i'm going to snap a load on one of their
  beanies


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906700
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.586421
text:
  <mirv> I sincerely hope this France -> Freedom thing doesn't
  go on for long.
  <Palpz> And in the news today, the United States Congress
  passed legislation renaming the Country of France to
  "Freedom".
  <DyRE> i'm so glad the people running my country are actually
  12-years old. i'm sure it won't be long now before some noted
  US politician calls Iraq "gay."


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906701
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.586566
text:
  <omglolbah> our official template database had a digital test
  logic page called "DIGITEST" (from the times when we used 8.3
  filenames)
  <omglolbah> so my coworker needed to create one for analog
  test logic <.<
  <omglolbah> I got to write the docs for "Template: ANALTEST"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906701
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.586618
text:
  <sKratch> you know what?  if we could choose our nationality
  at birth, there would be no canada
  <sKratch> or it would just be a country full of morons
  <sKratch> oh wait...


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906701
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.586671
text:
  <Goemon> There is no good mp3 trading programs now.
  <maff> sure there are
  <maff> ftp.
  <Goemon> I tried that.\
  <Goemon> In order to get name/password I had to sign up for
  porn.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906702
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.586778
text:
  * DrZaius sets mode: +b *.*!*@*
  <DrZaius> lmao
  <sneve> haha
  <Air|THPS2> doc
  <Air|THPS2> why *.*!?
  <DrZaius> i've been using dos a lot lately
  <DrZaius> and wasn't thinking
  * DrZaius sets mode: -b *.*!*@*


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906702
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.586834
text:
  <orion> i HATE
  <orion> the beastie boys.
  <Amanda_> Their talent is INTERGALACTIC
  <Amanda_> Saying you hate them is a form of SABOTAGE
  <Amanda_> GIRLS are always huge fans
  <orion> ....................................................
  <Amanda_> Looks like you need some BRASS MONKEY


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906702
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.586878
text:
  Jmack- i was dreaming of eating a marshmallow
  B-dawg- and what happened?
  Jmack- when i woke up
  b-dawg- then what
  Jmack- my pillow was gone......
  b-dawg- ........wtf......


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906703
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.586928
text:
  <@David> All of these kernel panics make this computer more
  secure.
  <@David> The machine can't be hacked when it's down.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906703
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.587031
text:
  <rushfan> im getting out of shape
  <rushfan> I only did 25 pushups and the room is already
  spinning'
  <qupada> drink some booze
  <qupada> maybe it will make the room spin the other way and
  they will cancel out


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906704
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.587079
text:
  <emufreak> I HATE CHANNEL TOPICS
  <emufreak> WHY MUST THEY EXIST
  <emufreak> AND WHY DO I STILL CLICK THEM WHEN THEY END IN .JPG


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906704
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.587137
text:
  <DigDug> i have gay fantasies about every guy i meet
  <DigDug> i try to take his picture
  <DigDug> and then i masturbate to it
  <DigDug> i have a whole archive of it on my hard drive
  <DigDug> that's why i'm running out of space
  <DigDug> not because i download warez


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906705
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.587376
text:
  <D1> ugh
  <D1> they put me on lithium!
  <sorbix> did they perscribe you batteries
  <D1> not yet.
  <D1> but who knows what they'll give me next time.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906706
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.587484
text:
  <jeff> A man goes into a pharmacy. He says to the druggist: "I
  need
  <jeff> some birth control for my eleven-year-old daughter."
  <jeff> "Is your little girl sexually active?" asks the
  druggist.
  <jeff> "Nah, she just lays there like her mother."
  <Wintermute> bring your family problems somewhere else


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906706
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.587531
text:
  <shockf00> anyone know where the fuck i can DL a bot for irc?
  <shockf00> isnt it like named Poloris or some shit?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906706
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.587586
text:
  > Okay life is good.
  > Some girl I know IRL.
  > Just im'ed me and said she masturbated thinking of me last
  night.
  > Yep, life is good.
  <Seryu> lol
  > Aww fuck.. she said it was the wrong window.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906707
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.587637
text:
  <Bearsy> hehehe... you dont really NEED pants.. they're just a
  nice to have
  <rik0> i only have them for the pockets


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906707
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.587692
text:
  <Raspberry> i think seisures are like the unique and beautiful
  snowflakes of the dance world
  <snipe> Raspberry: you're obviusly not epileptic then
  <snipe> What do you call an epileptic on a bed of lettuce?
  <Raspberry> *shrug*
  <snipe> Seizure salad
  * Raspberry groans


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906707
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.587752
text:
  *** Locke1` (~greens15@206.170.3.42) has joined #square
  <Locke1`> am i still banned?
  <Deadcounter> Locke: yes
  <Locke1`> shit
  <Locke1`> i'll leave now
  <Locke1`> sorry
  *** Locke1` (~greens15@206.170.3.42) has left #square
  <Deadcounter> eheheh
  <ift> amazing


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906708
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.587802
text:
  <Masta_D``> zophar was a trend
  <Masta_D``> it was hip to be with zophar
  <Masta_D``> till we all realized how gay he is


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906708
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.587856
text:
  <Haru> Shinji! Do you like Black Cock?
  <Solacido> Kyou: Three words for you: Oven - fresh - pizzas
  <Solacido > That's right kids, that peperoni, isn't what you
  thought it was
  <Spank > i thought it tasted like soul food


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906708
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.587906
text:
  <hawkman> my friend had a huge bloody nose in 11th grade, and
  he just shoved toilet paper up his nose until it stopped.
  then my friend grabbed a coat hanger out of his car (i'm not
  really sure why he had one), then we went into the girls
  bathroom and spread blood _ALL_ over one of the stalls, left
  the coat hanger there, and put up a sign that said "please
  dont flush my baby"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906709
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.588010
text:
  <hazza-> there was a young vampire named mable
  <hazza-> who's periods where really quite stable
  <hazza-> and every full moon
  <hazza-> she'd get out a spoon
  <hazza-> and drink herself under the table
  <|iCARUS> sick bastard
  <|iCARUS> i like it tho :0


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906709
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.588068
text:
  <Hidden_7> MOTHERFUCKING COMPUTER
  <Hidden_7> it is an expensive piece of hardware
  <Hidden_7> I've poured my heart, my soul, my LIFE into this
  bitch
  <Hidden_7> and it won't fucking give up the goods
  <Hidden_7> so fucking like a chick it's not EVEN funny


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906709
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.588120
text:
  DasKrav: We were playing a review game in history class, on
  the topic of the roman empire
  DasKrav: The game was like this: The class divides into 8
  groups, and one person rotates with the rest of the group in
  jeapordy-style questions,
  DasKrav: and the question was "What was the name of the
  emperor who built a wall in britain?"
  DasKrav: and nobody knew it, so he said "Here's a hint: Its
  named after him."
  DasKrav: and so this one jock guy in my class goes,
  DasKrav: "Berlin?"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906710
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.588171
text:
  * Suzzie just learned the term "donkey punch"
  <Suzzie> the question is, why is it listed in the "sports"
  category


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906710
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.588267
text:
  <Sirea> I want a daughter who has a tentacle fetish
  <Sirea> I also want to be able to download new fetishes to her
  brain on the fly


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906710
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.588323
text:
  * MogKnight fires suicide bombers at acpo
  <MogKnight> FOR ALLAH.
  <Cassie> don't mock allah :(
  <Cassie> he is my god
  <rikku> SO YOUR ARBIAN!!!!
  <Cassie> yes, i'm from Arbia


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906711
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.588372
text:
  (timmo) id fucking stab someone if i was in a dorm room
  (timmo) and woke up
  (timmo) and they were fucking whacking
  [Gimdb] i'd finish them off


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906712
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.588527
text:
  <a> i wish i had some vr goggles or something
  <Loc-Dog> a: for porn?
  <a> so nobody could tell i was playing games
  <a> games being interactive porn
  <Loc-Dog> a: they'd be able to tell when you pulled out the
  "joystick" to manuever your "character" in the "first person
  shooter"
  <a> Loc-Dog: i use the keyboard.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906712
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.588580
text:
  <Dekan-> WHAT THE FUCK... My Right nut is folded down under
  and then backaround ontop of my left nut
  <%Eizneckam> Umm
  <souletr> did you know that jesus smoked three packs a day?
  <@mootlif3> what the fuck is wrong with this chat..


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906712
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.588640
text:
  <Swish> the C5 military cargo plane?
  <iban> that's what my mom's boyfriend used to pilot
  <iban> yea the C5
  <Swish> cooool :D
  <iban> he said that when it loads it lowers the body down and
  opens the front and back
  <iban> its' the only plane that gets down on all fours to take
  it from both ends


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906712
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.588683
text:
  PaladinPrince555: today at highschool therewere these little
  punk ass 3 year old skater kids and they were trying to do
  these tricks and shit and sammi sadi LAND IT! and the little
  kid said SHUT UP! and i said shut up you little punk! i could
  kick your little ass! and he said SHUT UP then i said watch
  this and grinded the whole bench and they watched then the
  little punk said.... oh yeah? WATCH THIS! and he tried to do
  the same thing and he fell on his little punk ass
  BentlyCadillac: ahh
  BentlyCadillac: LMAO
  BentlyCadillac: HAHAHAHAHA
  BentlyCadillac: wait....he was 3?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906713
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.588778
text:
  <Konsole> I believe we both know the english language
  equally.. I may not use it very well in day to day
  conversations but I know much big words.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906713
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.588827
text:
  <aleisha_van> all of the puppets in the thunderbirds look
  vaguely like ernest borgnine. even the women. it's unnerving.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906714
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.588876
text:
  <Richie> What fanbois don't realise is that when they speak
  japanese they sound like the 12 year old girl they learnt it
  from


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906714
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.588921
text:
  * +bulitpruf is AFK, playing horseshoes wit my blind uncle and
  his midget son
  * +sab0t is AFK, playing horseshoes with my midget son & my
  gay nephew


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906714
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.589012
text:
  <Seldon> We will be holding a meeting tomorrow to discuss
  ChanServ/SRVX. We're looking forward to hear what users think
  of the service we work very hard to provide to you.
  *** Quits: ChanServ (Suarez.Hub.US.GamesNET.net
  Services.GamesNET.net).


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906715
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.589066
text:
  <HotStuff> FUCK YOU AND YOUR SEX HAVING WAYS!
  <Genepoolshark> Wug is, Roger!
  <HotStuff> FUCK OFF MOTHERFUCKERS!
  <Bullywug> Hey!
  <Genepoolshark> You and Wug are both virgins!
  <Genepoolshark> So, you can get together and fix it. :)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906715
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.589125
text:
  <loucura> She just accused me of having an affair with my
  router.
  <loucura> Route me baby Route me!  Oh!  Oh yah!  Oh!
  <ivan> damnit my packets aren't going through
  <loucura> ivan: That's because you're using the CONDOM flag


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906715
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.589179
text:
  <SithAdmin> * Now talking in #rape.support
  <SithAdmin> * Retrieving #rape info...
  <SithAdmin> * SithAdmin changes topic to 'You were all begging
  for it!'
  <SithAdmin> * You were kicked from #rape.support by RSBot
  (banned!)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906716
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.589226
text:
  <wip3out|isthekeymaster>fuck, i knew it... the one time I
  wanted pizza and it happens to be super bowl sunday, and now
  PapaJohns.com is getting DOSed by fat football fans.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906716
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.589272
text:
  tom: guys
  tom: youb willb neverb elieveb this
  tom: butb myb spaceb keyb keeps bputtingb ab spaceb andb then
  bab
  tom: ab b
  tom: whatb theb fuck
  Cube: rofl
  Cube: thta's really funny
  tom: MAKEB ITB FUCKINGB STOP
  tom: ohb heyb I bfoundb theb problem
  tom: there bisb something bbetweenb theb  bandb spaceb keys


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906716
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.589330
text:
  <Nubbers> Is there any listing of the criteria for a bash
  quote, anyway? Or should I just make a joke combining
  masturbation, child pornography, racism, and dungeons and
  dragons...
  <Edible> If it has "bash.org" or "nigger" in it, it'll get
  in.  Watch.
  <Edible> Hey, so nigger I nigger with nigger to nigger
  bash.org nigger bash.org bash.org nigger nigger nigger.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906716
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.589377
text:
  * sipr has joined #winprog
  <sipr> Where can I find information on dynamic data exchange?
  <drano> 1994


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906717
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.589431
text:
  <maff> yoga fire!
  <timmo> yoga flame!
  <maff> if you were dhalism right now, I bet you'd get stopped
  in the airport.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906717
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.589534
text:
  <Hagane> I can squeeze through 5 foot gaps in Crimson Skies.
  <Michael> Trouble is you can't do that in real life...
  <Hagane> Yeah, but it isn't that hard in the game... So it
  can't be that hard in real life...
  <Michael> It's exactly that type of mentality that drives this
  country forward.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906717
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.589588
text:
  <@Meshugga> vegai: be nice to them
  <@Meshugga> i know they're from poland, but those are the rare
  ones
  <@Meshugga> with brains and stuff
  <@vegai> I think I saw that, yeah
  <@vegai> I could see their oversized brains from my bedroom
  window


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906718
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.589630
text:
  (@MpTaNk) one time, I wanted to call someone and their number
  was on my computer, and my first reaction was to cut and paste
  it to the phone


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906718
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.589733
text:
  <Linguica> it would be funny if i got a serious death threat
  <Linguica> wtf
  <Linguica> wait a minute
  <Linguica> <Linguica> it would be funny if i got a serious
  death threat
  <Linguica> no it wouldnt


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906719
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.589791
text:
  <Slime> I think in ten years time I will look back on days
  like this and cry.
  <Slime> The times I spent at 2am talking about girls who have
  dicks and legs made of slugs eating each other whilst melting.
  <Slime> My future wife will be all "Tell me what you did as a
  teenager" and I will say " NOW IS TIME FOR SLEEP "
  <MechaMrEd> And then you'll notice she has an erection


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906719
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.589848
text:
  <caleb> "you're only running from yourself"
  <caleb> i yelled that after a pair of joggers once in the
  early 90s.
  <caleb> i thought it was hilarious.
  <caleb> i think there might have been some mescaline involved.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906719
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.589903
text:
  <ZeroHour> that NYLUG looked decent
  <ZeroHour> if we did a Mississippi LUG
  <ZeroHour> it would be a buncha grungy ass rednecks
  <ZeroHour> with ghetoo laptops and paintless rides
  <ZeroHour> rides where the paint peeled off
  <ZeroHour> rides with different colors on each panel of the
  body of the vehicle


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906720
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.590036
text:
  <Spacer> just heard a funny story from my mom just now
  <Spacer> she works as a teacher
  <Spacer> and in one of her classes, it started to smell like
  dog poo
  <Spacer> so she made everyone check their shoes, but they were
  all clean
  <Spacer> so she went to the head of year
  <Spacer> and got her to check everyones shoes
  <Spacer> but they were all clean still
  <Spacer> the smell was coming from the radiator area, so she
  asked the caretaker to check it out
  <Spacer> while he was doing that, she sent everyone outside
  <Spacer> but it still smelt in the corridor
  <Spacer> and she traced the smell to some girl
  <Spacer> and she checked her shoes, but they were clean
  <Spacer> she goes "you smell a little whiffy today, go to the
  toilets and check yourself out"
  <Spacer> so she walks off
  <Spacer> and the smell goes
  <Spacer> when she gets back, she goes to my mom
  <Spacer> with a big smile on her face, and says "sorry miss, i
  poo'd my panties"
  <Spacer> this is a year 11 girl, like 17 years old :P


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906720
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.590092
text:
  Nikki_afe > Russian biscuits are nice :)
  Snaar_afe > Nikki: hm, i can't remember anything special about
  them
  Snaar_afe > Nikki: i'm not sure if there is such thing as
  russian buscuits :-)
  Snaar_afe > maybe it's just a rebranded dry dogfood :-,
  oPless_afe > "russian biscuits" = potatos


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906721
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.590202
text:
  <AlieN__> hello...
  <AlieN__> I'm damn bored
  <AlieN__> be funny
  <AlieN__> please
  <Gato> *FART*
  <AlieN__> yay canadian jokes


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906721
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.590305
text:
  <Sn1p3r> Transferred 75 files totaling 3.41 GB in 01:20:20
  (751.53 KBps)
  <Sn1p3r> man, thats a lot of shit
  <[Piratez]> be sure to flush
  <[Piratez]> get a plunger while ur at it, i doubt 3.41gb will
  go down in one flush


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906722
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.590445
text:
  customer24601: what's that sound?
  macholyoke: me banging my head against my desk.
  customer24601: why are you banging your head against the desk.
  macholyoke: so I can speak to you in terms you'll understand,
  you retard.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906722
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.590796
text:
  <kylev> BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
  <kylev> hahahahaha
  <kylev> some girl just came onto our floor
  <kylev> and was yelling "sexual favors for anyone who does my
  sociology paper"
  <kylev> i just asked her what the paper was about
  <kylev> and she said the accomplishments and growth of
  feminism
  <`Neo> bahahahaha


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906723
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.590864
text:
  <ThaDragon> =) (=
  <ThaDragon> =* *=
  <ThaDragon> =**=
  <ThaDragon> *ziiiip*
  <ThaDragon> =) o=u=8 O=<
  <ThaDragon> *SLAP*
  <ThaDragon> =/ `o=u=8
  <ThaDragon> Thats the story of a man and a woman on the first
  date.
  <ThaDragon> =P


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906723
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.590928
text:
  <JibberJim> Your bios doesn't like your 5 1/4" drive roded?
  <roded> vmware doesn't actaully
  <Jumper_> yeah, downgrade to the 8" again
  * Jumper_ had a dual 8" drive - rocked
  <JibberJim> 8" is a downgrade? - man you must be liked by the
  ladies.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906727
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.590985
text:
  <Razor_EQ> god damn I just embarresed myself with a girtl I
  lik
  <Razor_EQ> like
  <Razor_EQ> look at this shit
  <Razor_EQ> rangers4life03: im glad i didnt ask for one now
  <Razor_EQ> dazed_n_confused_1983: i have cokes and dr peppers
  tea
  <Razor_EQ> rangers4life03: cool dr pepper
  <Razor_EQ> rangers4life03: but I dont drink cocks anymore


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906728
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.591091
text:
  <Zug> Veronika: come give me head, plz
  <Zug> I'm cute and single.
  <Veronika9> Zug: go to hell
  <Veronika9> I only give head if there is something in it for
  me!
  <Zug> I'll talk dirty to you while you're doing it.
  <Zug> how's that.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906729
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.591236
text:
  mac: LOL the vending machine at school hate blacks!
  mac: I was waiting in line behind three black guys
  mac: they each put in their money press the same button and
  nothing happens
  mac: I walk up put in my money press the same button and four
  Dr.Peppers fall out!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906729
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.591292
text:
  <DrNick668> i was clever enough to flush a condom in a toilet
  and now if i look down the drain in my bathroom there is a
  condom snagged on something hanging halfway down the hole
  <DrNick668> i can't move it
  <Livewireo> drain the toilet and dig it out
  <c-rOCK> fuck that
  <c-rOCK> eat some burritos
  <c-rOCK> attack with force.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906729
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.591346
text:
  <+Rustblade> I'm so angry!!
  <+Rustblade> fucking computer
  <+Rustblade> I'm gonna kick it
  * +Rustblade kicks his computer *
  Quits: Rustblade (rustblade@northface.intercarve.net) (Remote
  host closed the connection)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906730
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.591397
text:
  <mcdaza> though i still maintain that its virtual bullshit
  <Robzy> virtual bullshit??? Does that mean my virtual shoe can
  step in it?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906730
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.591509
text:
  <darkdragon18> yeah i live in England too
  <Crystal> Damnit, the strap on my bra broke.. >_<
  <darkdragon18> you shoudl buy a new brassyeah
  <Primigenus> "brassyeah"?
  <IceDelta> I think he meant brassière ;-)
  <Primigenus> ...
  <darkdragon18> fuck you, i thnk Id know how to spell words tat
  orignate in my own language


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906730
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.591555
text:
  <jaydogg14!#devart> is anyone here from europe and hate
  americans, please msg me for this damn homework i gotta do


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906731
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.591609
text:
  <Tenkz> GG and Riot sitting in a tree
  <Tenkz> virtually undressing...ly.
  <MrPants> first comes asl
  <Tenkz> then comes cyber
  <Girl_Gamer_152> then comes meet in real life and IT'S A 60YO
  TRANSFESTITE!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906731
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.591650
text:
  (bec)jess is DA bomb
  (larry)what her fathers a terrist :( ?????
  (bec)shes da bomb not a bomb u idiot


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906731
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.591700
text:
  <meeb> what the fuck
  <meeb> highly religious client just rang up
  <meeb> wants us to automatically take their website down at
  sunset on a friday until sunrise on a monday
  <meeb> as using an online shop is bad and evil over the
  sabbath


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906732
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.591748
text:
  <Saty> man
  <Saty> active directory is to system resources
  <Saty> what joseph stalin was to human rights


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906732
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.591816
text:
  <Chris H> I'm going to marry someone with no eyes and no
  teeth.
  <CharlEnie> haha
  <Zilv3r> LmAo LoL!
  <Chris H> It isn't THAT funny... do u even know why she
  <Zilv3r> yeah!! so she doesn't bite you...
  <CharlEnie> Does that mean u dont know why she shouldn't have
  eyes?
  <Zilv3r> no.. wait.. i know i know!!! so she cant see you?
  <CharlEnie> LoL!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906732
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.591870
text:
  <D-BOY> MK, you shouldn't assume so much
  <chockoman> YEAH
  <chockoman> YOU KNOW WHAT ASSUMING DOES
  <chockoman> IT MAKES AN ASS OUT OF YOU
  <chockoman> AND SOME GUY NAMED MING


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906733
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.591918
text:
  ILOVEKAZAA (java@81.109.64.QK00=) has joined. «25 people»
  <@Infinik> ILOVEKAZAA: Hello, I work for the RIAA. Your
  computer address has been logged.
  <ILOVEKAZAA> FUCK
  ILOVEKAZAA «java@81.109.64.QK00=» has Quit iRC (User exited)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906733
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.591965
text:
  * Carson_Marl continues to sing loudly as he showers, "Yoda!
  Yo, Yo, Yo, Yo, Yooooodaaaaaaaa!"
  * Carson_Marl continues to shower and sing, "Music and
  blasters and old Jedi Masters at the..."


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906733
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.592066
text:
  <[Hobbes]> -rw-------    1 hobbes  hobbes  7802880 Aug 20
  07:03 metaballs.core
  <[Hobbes]> wtf is THAT
  <@dk> your metaballs dumped thier core? ;)
  <[Hobbes]> heh I read it as meatballs the first time
  <@ky_druid> damn Hobbes, do you have to use your metaballs so
  hard that they coredump? sheesh.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906734
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.592125
text:
  <@pr3x3l> my sister goes to emory
  <@Blaxthos> is she hot ?
  <@pr3x3l> we think she's a lesbian dude
  <@Blaxthos> what's her number ?
  <@Blaxthos> i'll finalize the decision for her


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906734
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.592178
text:
  Finque: at least that young black fellow will live
  Finque: black people can't die virgins
  Finque: it's physically and sexually impossible
  Finque: god is still apologizing for burning them
  Finque: so he gave them horse cocks
  Finque: and now they always get laid
  tom: except DE
  Finque: true
  Finque: but DE is canadian
  Finque: that's god's "oops" pile


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906734
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.592233
text:
  <robotobon> i am a bastard operator from hell
  <robotobon> i used to sneek into the server room and unplug
  ethernet at random and run
  <robotobon> then 5 minutes later i'd get a call at my desk
  <robotobon> and i'd fix it really fast and be a hero


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906735
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.592286
text:
  <Volt9000> .. WHY THE FUCK DOES MY FLOPPY DISK DRIVE NOT WORK
  <Volt9000> oh wait nm
  <Volt9000> there's no disk in it


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906735
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.592337
text:
  <nolamerbro> i m god in cs
  <nolamerbro> my shots are perfectly timed and geometrically
  placed right into peoples skulls
  <Jtal> thats a fancy way of saying "AIMBOT"...


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906735
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.592390
text:
  <homerj> womyn butch dykes always bothered me
  <homerj> if they hate men so much, why do they go to such
  great lengths to be exactly like them?
  <issuez> the only reason why they bother you is because they
  get more pussy than you


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906736
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.592441
text:
  <Doodleheimer> To all the girls here: What's it like having
  boobs?
  <Doodleheimer> I just have some questions about them.
  <Peter_Griffin> Doodle wants to know if he scans his hand and
  sends to you and you rub it on your chest if it still counts
  as getting to second base.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906736
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.592505
text:
  <@cloudchild> if i wanted to drink the blood from a horned
  creature, i would've went after bob dole
  <@DarkDread> I just thought those were really large ears.
  <@cloudchild> nope horns.  and he hides his tail well...but
  you can see his hoofed feet if the camera angle is right
  <@cloudchild> "I'm bob dole!  i kill virgins and drink the
  blood of the pope!"
  <@DarkDread> what's so bad about that?
  <@cloudchild> nothin.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906736
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.592599
text:
  <boii> i used to name a box after each girl i nailed
  <boii> that way, whenever i nailed a new girl, id treat myself
  to a new box


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906737
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.592673
text:
  <lunacrow> nobody makes porn for women
  <lunacrow> ever
  <lunacrow> when have you ever seen any
  <Destruya> Actually, one woman did.
  <lunacrow> one woman
  <Destruya> I can't remember the name.
  <lunacrow> exactly
  <lunacrow> yet women look at porn
  <Destruya> http://www.royalle.com/
  <lunacrow> "As you peruse my various pages, you'll not only
  find my catalog of couples movies with a woman's touch, you'll
  also read about my thoughts on sex, romance, eroticism and
  life in general."
  <lunacrow> i already know these movies will suck
  <Destruya> hahahah


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906737
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.592750
text:
  <Dave123> So I there s this virgin girl  I know, she is
  Inconceivable
  <Turtleman> no she's unbearable
  <NINJAmes> no you idiots, she's Impregnable


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906737
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.592813
text:
  {ava}> A WORM
  <{ava}> JUST
  <{ava}> CRAWLED OUT OF MY DOGS ASS AND LANDED ON ME
  <_enzo> o m f g
  * {ava} dies.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906737
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.592871
text:
  <AGodlyHeretic> and i installed enough security equipment on
  my computer, that even i think i might have gone overboard
  <smokedbrown> lol
  <AGodlyHeretic> no seriously, it records every keystroke i
  make and is totally hidden. can only be DETECTED with my
  password, and requires a second password to open it. it also
  is designed to take screenshots everyso often when a specific
  strings is typed
  <smokedbrown> Dude.
  <smokedbrown> um.
  <smokedbrown> the white people of waco called. they want thier
  paranoia back


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906738
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.592927
text:
  <Shounen> The expression "smooth as a baby's bottom" is
  socially acceptable.
  <Shounen> But saying something is "tight as a baby's bottom"
  gets you all kind of weird looks.
  <ssai> you shoulda seen the looks i got when i said i had a
  breast feeding fetish


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906738
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.592988
text:
  <@Kaelic> my arm hurts from bowling
  <@Kaelic> you would think it is use to this kind of stress
  <@Orca> ...no comment
  * @Orca isn't going to take as obvious a shot as that one ;p
  <@Kaelic> I'll leave that to be interpreted as each sees fit
  :)
  <@OWK> It's probably used to handling smaller balls.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906738
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.593036
text:
  blade|uk: oh no
  blade|uk: another AOLer
  DONTGIVEU: uh yes
  DONTGIVEU: who cares im not a bad aoler
  DONTGIVEU: i do good for this room
  blade|uk: room
  blade|uk: haha
  blade|uk: typical AOLer
  blade|uk: it's called a channel


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906739
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.593089
text:
  (CitizenC): Hey, here's a question for ya.. what if Jesus was
  gay?
  (CitizenC): You know what? I bet he was.
  (CitizenC): Walking around in that desert with his apostles
  forever?
  (CitizenC): They didn't have porn back then, which left only
  two options:
  (CitizenC): * Beat off behind a mountain somewhere to memories
  of Mary, or
  (CitizenC): * Say "Yo!  Deciples!  Suck my cock!  I'm the son
  of God!"
  (CitizenC): Personally, I think that second one is much more
  likely.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906739
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.593133
text:
  Entsuropi: uhm, im out to see tomb raider 2 at 6:30
  Pete: and WHY would you want to do a thing like that?
  Entsuropi: tomb raider one was a highly entertaining piece of
  trash
  Entsuropi: and jolie looks hot in the trailers
  Entsuropi: its like porn with gunfire


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906739
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.593188
text:
  <Heather> penises are scary =/
  <Kevyn> how so?
  <Heather> they feel weird.
  <Kevyn> how do they feel?
  <Heather> like the rubber lizard in spencer's.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906740
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.593250
text:
  <pulse__> HAHA!!
  <pulse__> HAHA!!
  <pulse__> HAHA!!
  <pulse__> HAHA!!
  <pulse__> I JUST GOT A PAYRISE!!!
  <pulse__> HAHAHAHAHAHA
  <pulse__> could this company be any more stupid?
  <pulse__> I DON'T DO ANYTHING!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906740
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.593303
text:
  <Rafa> A Pirate walks into a bar.
  <Rafa>The bartender says "Hey youve got a steering wheel in
  your crotch."
  <Malkatov> The pirate says "Arrrr its driving me nuts"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906740
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.593349
text:
  [TA]-1 Ozzy0: any CSS clans in here?
  Hambocho: you must really be into web programming if you're
  after a CSS clan.
  Lord Traith: I'm after an RSS clan.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906741
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.593446
text:
  <CardboardArmor> The Great Unclean One will get around to your
  sheet when he isn't busy.  Or masturbating.  Whatever comes
  first.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906741
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.593494
text:
  <TheMaxx> "A Tomahawk cruise missile might have missed its
  target in Iraq and landed in southwest Iran"
  <TheMaxx> those things are bitch to steer


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906742
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.593636
text:
  <lice> i swear
  <lice> i hate ppl that promise work done without asking me
  first
  <Killeroy> that's called "managing"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906742
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.593692
text:
  <Skilless15> what's rtfm
  <Skilless15> i forgot
  <@avaxx> read the fucking manual.
  <Skilless15> why
  <Skilless15> you could just tell me


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906742
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.593739
text:
  <Don> scyth, I come here for the loving people and atmosphere
  happy.gif
  <scyth> I come here because I forgot to remove it from my
  auto-connect list


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906743
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.593819
text:
  <Rufus>  Damn, a job at blizzard would certainly be cool
  <Shinji>  nah
  <Shinji>  you'd get your paycheck 7 months after you are
  supposed to
  <Rufus>  So true
  <Rufus>  And it would be "patched" and "downgraded" by that
  time
  <Rufus>  Your net result would be a check for 5 bucks with
  "gogogogogogoggogogo" written all over it
  <Shinji>  But don't forget
  <Shinji>  There'd be a dupe bug, so you could get double your
  pay as much as you want
  <Rufus>  You'd have to throw the check on the ground, then
  pick it up and your pocketbook at the same time
  <Shinji>  ... but then you'd lag trying to cross the street to
  get to the bank, get hit by a bicyclist repeatedly, and die :)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906743
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.593888
text:
  <davester> alright, in a month when i'm building this
  computer, everything will have changed, so i'm not going to
  bother now
  <davester> they'll have gforce9's and p5's and terrabit hdd's
  <davester> all for cheap
  <Deathblend> and 256bit athlons
  <davester> word
  <davester> WORD
  <Deathblend> you mean dword


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906743
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.593939
text:
  <iggypop> if i dont get on tomorrow, i'm probably burnt up
  <iggypop> i took the battery out of my smoke alarm for my
  digicam


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906744
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.594035
text:
  <mosey> for some reason porn never shows up in my "my recent
  documents" quick launch
  <mosey> i hate having to wait for explorer to come up


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906744
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.594093
text:
  <sal> how to best explain the need for distributed systems to
  management? redundancy?
  <Morbus> bodies.
  <Morbus> think about it: if you bury a single body in one
  place, when the police find it, you're screwed.
  <Morbus> but cut a body up and bury it all over the place, and
  you're maximizing your potential.
  <sal> yeah im sure that'll hit close enough to home


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906744
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.594153
text:
  <Pascal> Aieee!  On a company's resume submission form:  What
  level of education do you possess?  yes  no
  * Pascal answers 'yes'
  <fEk> Who would answer 'no' to that? :)
  <Pascal> The person who designed this form?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906745
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.594241
text:
  <brokengolfclub> you would agree, as all westerners do, that
  rape is wrong correct ?
  <PlexisKarma> yes, unless filmed correctly


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906745
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.594291
text:
  <sweet_chick> hey peeps wuts happen
  <SiZZuRp> sweet love by a fire
  <SiZZuRp> with goats and other various wildlife
  <sweet_chick> awwwwwwwww hot sweet


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906746
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.594333
text:
  [Amanda_] No way, Chris, I had real food for dinner
  [`michael] squirrels
  [Amanda_] dude
  [Amanda_] Squirrel is good


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906746
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.594394
text:
  <Numi> hey, can you guys just check a site out and tell me if
  it's up?
  <Haddock> depends, what is it?
  <Numi> just my apache server, it works for me but seems to be
  down for anyone else
  <Haddock> alright, what's the address?
  <Numi> http://127.0.0.1
  <Haddock> ......
  <Haddock> ...Yeah, it's up.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906746
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.594441
text:
  [ace_kevi] heh, i didn't know there was a programming language
  called
  brainfuck.
  [buz-] goes by "MIPS assembler" also


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906747
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.594502
text:
  <Miz> why does windows messager not close? :E
  <Miz> there isnt anything using it!
  <Cheez> hotmail?
  <Miz> not visible anyway
  <Miz> nope
  <Miz> no windows open 'cept this
  <Cheez> try killing the process
  * Miz has quit IRC (Connection reset by peer)
  <Cheez> wrong process...


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906747
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.594642
text:
  <doctorb> goth clubs should serve coffee. ice cold coffee.
  with nails and broken glass. and call then 'depresso's


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906748
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.594693
text:
  <[Piratez]> so what kinda job you got?
  <drunkers> i wash dishes
  <[Piratez]> at a resturaunt?
  <drunkers> no, at home


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906748
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.594735
text:
  rated U for ugly: Maybe they should put the IRS at the border
  instead...
  rated U for ugly: cause illegals
  rated U for ugly: seem to be afraid of paying taxes


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906748
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.594790
text:
  <enid> laz. sounds like you just need to get sex.
  <enid> hold on, i'll scan my tits for you.
  <^Laz> yeah... theres been a serious lack of that lately for
  me
  <^Laz> lately being the last 20 years


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906749
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.594856
text:
  <Nazgul> my grandma got some pictures developed, and she was
  showing them to me, and said that they must have accidently
  one of someone else's pictures in with hers
  <Nazgul> because there was a pic of a woman and man standing
  beside each other with their dog
  <Nazgul> and I was looking at it, and thinking weird..then
  looked in the upper right hand corner and saw a flying saucer
  in the sky
  <Nazgul> and was like "SHIT!"
  <BloodFromStone> o_o
  <BloodFromStone> Don't send them back.
  <Nazgul> then flipped it over and it was a promotional
  advertisement thing for "Taken" on the scifi channel
  * Nazgul chuckles.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906749
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.594961
text:
  <BluECliQ> My uncle from South Carolina is visiting for the
  week.
  <BluECliQ> I haven't seen this guy in 10 years and we have
  nothing in common, but I have to make small talk for another 5
  hours until my mom gets home.
  <champlor> what kinda stuff is he into?
  <BluECliQ> He hunts, fishes, drinks and works for a cable
  company.
  <champlor> your uncle is larry the cable guy?
  <BluECliQ> If he says 'git er done', I'm leaving my house.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906749
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.595013
text:
  <Disco`Stu> fat girls need loving too
  <kodos> someone has to take one for the team
  <kodos> i vote its luke
  <lukeiyo-e> damn you fuckers
  <lukeiyo-e> alright.. someone pass me a torch


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906750
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.595061
text:
  <L-dawg> lol, I was 10 years old and figured out how sex works
  from the electronic coupling naming convention
  <L-dawg> damn electrical engineers


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906750
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.595115
text:
  * Joins: Thogart
  (~Womper85@44.31.171.66.subscriber.vzavenue.net)
  <Thogart> Tampa is the lightning capital of the world..
  <Thogart> and its storming..
  <Apsy|Laundry> And you think its smart to be online Thogart?
  <Thogart> Well... yea.
  <Thogart> I mean, my house has been hit twice before so whats
  the chance of it happening 3 times...
  <Cuda> Thogart, quite good :p
  *** Quits: Thogart (Read error: Connection reset by peer)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906750
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.595165
text:
  <JD> I, or one of my teammates, shall cause you to become
  electroencephalographically challenged.
  Mr Brown> ill kill you
  <JD> No, I like the way I say it better


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906751
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.595212
text:
  <Happy_Dot> So my dad and I were reading readers digest, and
  there was this ad for some apocalypse book. It said "The end
  is near! Dont delay! This book will tell you everything you
  need to know! Hurry!" Then, at the bottom of the page, it says
  : please allow 6 to 8 weeks for delivery.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906751
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.595256
text:
  <UnKn|ilc|n1rv> If i was a really good artist, i would just
  draw pictures of naked women and beat off to them


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906751
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.595310
text:
  <tinks> besides, the more i have in savings, the more i can
  put into my 401k every month
  <tinks> yeayyyyy 401k
  <brat> Doesn't 401k come out of your paycheck, not savings?
  <grue> heh, they should havae called the savings accounts at
  Enron the 404k
  <grue> savings not found


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906752
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.595362
text:
  <rixon> I remember calling BBS's on my party line.
  <rixon> my neighbors house burned down, and they couldnt call
  the FD cause we were online.
  <rixon> 3 ppl died.
  <rixon> that sucked.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906753
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.595488
text:
  ***  mrBlond changes topic to "Open party at Minko's, All
  welcome. Place for 500"
  <Minko> grrrr
  <Minko> You can all come, but I'm not gonna be there
  *** mrBlond changes topic to "Open party at Minko's  <Minko>
  You can all come"
  <Minko> Stop it guys, I'm busy this weekend
  <Minko> I've got big things planned
  *** mrBlond changes topic to "Open party at Minko's  <Minko>
  You can all come <Minko> I've got big things planned"
  <Minko> Aaargh


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906753
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.595542
text:
  <DigDug> i'm so tired of reformatting quotes :/
  <c-rOCK> THEN DONT
  <c-rOCK> KILL THAT QDB
  <c-rOCK> LIKE YOU WERE ABRAHAM
  <c-rOCK> AND THAT SHIT IS YOUR SON


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906754
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.595591
text:
  < Izazael > Why did they never make romantic warheads?
  < Izazael > I guess no one likes the taste of semen.
  < Izazael > What could be more romantic than the girls who gag
  on cum club at yahoo?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906754
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.595652
text:
  <+Camus> im palazed!
  <+Fleebis> Palazed?
  <+Fleebis> Paralyzed?
  <+Camus> yea
  <+Camus> close
  <+Camus> kinda
  <+Camus> i just type in the first letter
  <+Camus> and hit a couple keys
  <+Fleebis> oh, i underktnjd


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906754
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.595712
text:
  <Diamond> But what's truly awesome is my new Radeon 9500 Pro.
  <tidalblaze> OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
  <Diamond> That I will treat as if it were my first-born child.
  <tidalblaze> AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
  <Diamond> ...Apparently when I have kids I'm going to stick
  them inside a small aluminum box.
  <Diamond> And have them process numbers for me all day.
  <Diamond> So I can watch porn.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906754
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.595762
text:
  <homerj> a robot on Futurama
  <homerj> "You know why they are using WIndows 3000 as a prison
  guard?"
  <homerj> because it always locks up


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906755
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.595811
text:
  <Rottingbeef> i live in "yawn" america
  <Rottingbeef> but im only 11, so dont think im some serial
  killer


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906755
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.595870
text:
  <Raymondo> I'm a lot funnier in real life.
  <Megatron5000> that doesn't matter here
  <Raymondo> I'm just pointing out I don't suck 24/7
  <PrzeCM03|04> who cares what's your sucking timetable


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906756
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.596028
text:
  <Sabdo> So I went into my school's band room for the first
  time today
  <Sabdo> Biggest bunch of nerds I've ever met.
  <Sabdo> and this one girl walks in, really hot,
  <Sabdo> and I swear to fucking god,
  <Sabdo> three kids pulled out inhalers


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906757
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.596133
text:
  <cryt> germans can't speak straight.
  <tyree> cryt, ever been over here?
  <cryt> unfortunately.
  <cryt> found meself shitting on the park benches. no public
  toilets.
  <cryt> "YOU THERE, STOP! I NEED TO USE YOUR SHIRT TO WIPE ME
  BUM!"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906757
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.596184
text:
  <i8b4uUnderground> d-_-b
  <BonyNoMore> how u make that inverted b?
  <BonyNoMore> wait
  <BonyNoMore> never mind


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906757
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.596236
text:
  <pritch> jeez
  <pritch> sauron couldve got the one ring on ebay for £4.99
  <pritch> oh wait
  <pritch> excludes delivery to mordor
  <fragglet> one does not simply deliver to mordor


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906757
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.596281
text:
  <terra> time to slay the dragon!
  * Dezy-chan gts some random asian girl to do crazy action
  poses while playing!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906758
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.596374
text:
  <@Iceman> OW i just stabbed myself in the eye with a
  mechanical pencil
  <@Iceman> was trying to get it to stick in my ceiling, it fell
  in my eye


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906758
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.596420
text:
  <Lemming> one thing i dislike about broad band
  <Lemming> porn popups load before you can close them, lol


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906758
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.596467
text:
  *** Now talking in #tZrhj26trDS4yurgrCNR4eyd
  *** Topic is 'The Only Channel With A Name Created By
  Head-Butting The Keyboard'


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906759
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.596517
text:
  <Tharivol> once I had to write something on the computer on
  paper..
  <Tharivol> i hit ctrl-c then...
  <Tharivol> my brain sorta got jammed in neutral


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906759
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.596580
text:
  <Mr`K> When people find out you play video games, they think..
  like..
  <Mr`K> You play EVERY video game
  <nzc> dont you?
  <Mr`K> "Oh, I got this game, I can't get past this part, what
  do I do?"
  <Mr`K> And it's like Barbie's Fashion Designer


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906759
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.596628
text:
  Rangsk: I'm watching a movie and I hit some key by accident...
  dunno which
  Mmytacism: haha
  Rangsk: and all the sudden something seems... not right
  Rangsk: after about a minute I realize that the sound is going
  2x as fast but the video is still going 1x
  Mmytacism: hahahahaha
  Rangsk: and I'm like... wtf... why would someone program that
  as a FEATURE?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906760
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.596678
text:
  <|Chris> there's one bitch in the world
  <|Chris> one bitch with many different faces
  <|Chris> find a new face.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906760
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.596778
text:
  <[0FXTCJ|U> are you excited now?!?!?!
  <[0FX|nw> yeah
  <[0FXTCJ|U> do you have an erection?!
  <[0FX|nw> no
  <[0FX|nw> hmm
  <[0FX|nw> ¨cant say this in english
  <[0FX|nw> i tooked my hand on my cock and drew forwards and
  backwards
  <[0FX|nw> what do u call it?
  <[0FXTCJ|U> jacking off?
  <[0FX|nw> oh
  <[0FX|nw> in sweden we call it runka


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906760
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.596839
text:
  <Kiko> I love you guys
  <@mjau> we love you too kiko
  <@mjau> dude, kiko... isnt that a type of soy sauce
  <@mjau> KIKOMAN
  <@mjau> hehehe
  <@mjau> salty yet delicious
  <Kiko> Thats what SHE said
  <Kiko> :)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906761
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.596930
text:
  *** Hiretsukan has left #verge
  *** Hiretsukan has joined #verge
  <andy> do the first half of that trick again.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906761
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.596981
text:
  <damocles> osama bin laden is hiding in my shed.  I feed him
  boiled cabbage once a week, and when he sleeps I read the
  bible to him


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906761
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.597029
text:
  <Mp3Boy-> I told him grep pulls out the shit u want
  <Mp3Boy-> like cat girl | grep pussy
  <Mp3Boy-> then he understood


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906762
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.597074
text:
  <Berzerker> we had a blackout in our neighborhood the other
  day, until the cops came and took him away


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906762
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.597124
text:
  <@MajorKong> man, it is quiet in here....
  <@MajorKong> either you are all asleep in anticipation of
  tomorrow's feasting.....
  <@MajorKong> or I seriously need to buy stock in kleenex.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906762
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.597182
text:
  <fahd> stop making fun of my religion.  islam isn't funyn,
  it's serious
  <fahd> now shutup, i have to study for calculus
  <Hat> Fahd, is Allah good at calculus?
  <fahd> >:(
  <Hat> Yeah, I guess not.  He's only good at bomb mak.... I
  mean chemistry.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906762
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.597231
text:
  <Borgus> How does one go about becoming an op?
  <Fembot> kneepads, a dark room, and a strong stomach


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906763
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.597285
text:
  <dragman> Did you know the legal age of consent in Canadia is
  14?
  <lockdown!> Interesting...all i need now is a cheap flight and
  some deodorant
  <lockdown!> I think Hollands has a low consent age as well
  <dragman> Hehe.  You go that way, I go this way and we meet in
  the middle.  Highest kiddy total wins £20
  <lockdown!> The game is on


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906763
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.597375
text:
  <JtotheB> There is a certain brand of coolness that one can
  achieve only by being fully CSS and HTML standards compliant.
  * JtotheB flashes a shit-eating grin and cracks a beer.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906764
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.597422
text:
  Dervish: I want boxer shorts that have text " Geek inside" in
  the front =)
  plan-9: why? noone will ever see that


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906764
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.597477
text:
  <etoilet> i went into the D&D store cuz they had old capcom
  arcade booths for sale,  and my girlfriend followed me in.
  All the guys were sitting at a table playing D&D,  and this
  one long haired dude got up out of his seat, strode up to my
  gf, bowed and said "May I help you my lady?"
  <crunchyfish> I don't know, man. That's pretty smooth. What
  was his charisma? 17? 18?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906764
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.597538
text:
  *** Meeko has joined #Animorphs
  <Meeko> ennnik!
  <Meeko> I've been pantsed while commando!
  <Meeko> "What an interesting turn of events."  "THEY'RE FLESH
  COLORED UNDERWEAR."  "God, I wish."
  <Meeko> So now I'm holed up inside for the rest of today,
  nurturing my wounded pride.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906765
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.597643
text:
  <uZi`> i got a photographic memory
  <uZi`> :/
  <Grimmeehh> cool
  <Grimmeehh> porn on demand
  <uZi`> mainly for numbers tho
  <Grimmeehh> o
  <uZi`> only ascii porn
  <uZi`> :(


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906765
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.597690
text:
  <Tonberry> MPs do the same thing on a military base as regular
  cops do in a city
  <metaldark> harass blacks and skaters?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906765
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.597736
text:
  <fluffy> also, you drastically reduce your chances of getting
  prostate cancer through frequent masturbation
  <fluffy> so I think everyone in this channel is safe


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906766
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.597788
text:
  <mrfrosty> your'e a faggot short of a raging fire
  <mrfrosty> if you know what i mean
  <mrfrosty> and if you do, let me know


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906766
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.597844
text:
  <evilada> is it right to cheat on a paper for ethics class?
  <evilada> i mean im just saying
  <evilada> things would get done a whole lot quicker
  <evilada> and it would be a wonderful practice in irony
  <mike310> what if you get caught?
  <evilada> just say it was some ass backwards experiment about
  ethics and shit. You'll probably get an A.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906766
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.597894
text:
  <`Iago> how much is a million yen in canadian?
  <teklord^> like one dollar
  <`Iago> yeah... cause i figured that the japanese version of
  who wants to be a millioniare must really suck


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906767
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.597943
text:
  Alcedes53: I've got everything on my computer from Bach to Bad
  Religion.
  Tsukemono5: Clearly, you have a wide variety of music.
  Tsukemono5: Seriously. What fits in that range? Backstreet
  Boys?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906767
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.598033
text:
  (Matt^^^) I got an A+ in home ec, cuz I helped marinate the
  teacher's fish, if you know what I mean


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906768
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.598081
text:
  <magpie> why am I watching spice girls behind the music
  <magpie> am I that bored
  <jeff> you obviously need to spice up your life


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906768
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.598190
text:
  <miv>   http://www.tdcj.state.tx.us/stat/finalmeals.htm
  <miv>   final meals of people who are on death row
  <miv>   "Justice, Equality, World Peace"
  <miv>   what kind of request is that
  <miv>   U CANT EAT THAT! moron
  <miv>   if it was me i would have asked for a 6 year old
  japanese girl
  <miv>   i'd eat her out


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906768
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.598264
text:
  <cameltoe> Best resignation letter ever:
  <cameltoe> Dear Mr X,
  As a graduate of an institution of higher education, I have a
  few very basic expectations. Chief among these is that my
  direct superiors have an intellect that ranges above the
  common ground squirrel. After your consistent and annoying
  harassment of my co-workers and me during the commission of
  our duties, I can only surmise that you are one of the few
  true genetic wastes of our time.
  Asking me, a network administrator, to explain every little
  nuance of everything I do each time you happen to stroll into
  my office is not only a waste of time, but also a waste of
  precious oxygen. I was hired because I  know how to network
  computer systems, and you were apparently hired to provide
  amusement to myself and other employees, who watch you vainly
  attempt to understand the concept of "cut and paste" for the
  hundredth time.
  You will never understand computers. Something as incredibly
  simple as binary still gives you too many options. You will
  also never understand why people hate you, but I am going to
  try and explain it to you.........
  You walk around the building all day, shiftlessly looking for
  fault in others. You have a sharp dressed useless look about
  you that may have worked for your interview, but now that you
  actually have responsibility, you pawn it off on overworked
  staff, hoping their talent will cover for your glaring
  ineptitude. In a world of managerial evolution, you are the
  blue-green algae that everyone else eats and laughs at.
  Managers like you are a sad proof of the Dilbert principle.
  Since this situation is unlikely to change without you getting
  a full frontal lobotomy reversal, I am forced to tender my
  resignation.
  However, I have a few parting thoughts.
  1. When someone calls you in reference to employment, it is
  illegal for you to give me a bad reference. The most you can
  say to hurt me is "I prefer not to comment." I will have
  friends randomly call you over the next couple of years to
  keep you honest, because I know you would be unable to do it
  on your own.
  2. I have all the passwords to every account on the system,
  and I know every password you have used for the last five
  years. If you decide to get cute, I am going to publish your
  "favorites list", which I conveniently saved when you made me
  "back up" your useless files. I do believe that terms like
  "Lolita" are not usually viewed favorably by the company.
  3. When you borrowed the digital camera to "take pictures of
  your Mother's birthday," you neglected to mention that you
  were going to take pictures of yourself in the mirror n.de.
  Then you forgot to erase them like the techno-moron you really
  are. Suffice it to say I have never seen such odd acts with a
  sauce bottle, but I assure you that those have been copied and
  kept in safe places pending the authoring of a glowing letter
  of reference. (Try to use a spell check please; I hate having
  to correct your mistakes.)
  Thank you for your time, and I expect the reference on my desk
  by 8:00 am tomorrow. One word of this to anybody, and all of
  your little twisted repugnant obsessions will be open to the
  public. Never f*** with your systems administrator. Why?
  Because they know what you do with all that free time!
  Wishing you a grand and glorious day'.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906769
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.598333
text:
  <etiolate> high:one post, a girl proclaiming she has leopard
  print underwear
  <etiolate> low:next post, girl proclaiming fred durst turns
  her on
  <Wala> high; girl that lives in your city and then comes over
  and plays wc3 with you and then you have sex with her and then
  she brings friends and you have sex with them every day and
  then you win the lottery for 500million
  <Staquaft> What's the low against that?
  <Wala> low; girls have aids
  <Wala> but
  <Wala> that's not very low
  <Wala> considering how you have 500 million
  <Wala> to pay for treatment
  <Kevyn> high; you stop talking.
  <Kevyn> low; you keep talking.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906769
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.598379
text:
  Vortosis: The best line is something my friend Brandon yelled
  at a chick across the street while we were skating
  Vortosis: "Hey wanna go half and half on a baby!?"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906769
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.598428
text:
  <VOmitOry> I have a problem, every file i download gets
  corrupted, anyone know why? :o
  <kn1ves> is your computer republican?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906770
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.598535
text:
  <Mr_CAD> let's try a different encoding..
  <Mr_CAD> hehe ANSI
  <Mr_CAD> !translate en_zh test
  <CCU-Bot> TRANSLATING... ONE MOMENT, PLEASE
  <CCU-Bot>  BABEL&nbsp;FISH&nbsp;&nbsp; The Web is full of
  suprises. Questions? Check out our FAQs.
  <Mr_CAD> lol
  <Mr_CAD> well, obviously it doesn't take ANSI :)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906770
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.598592
text:
  <rhraz_w3rk> recession? pshh, i haven't seen one hobo yet!
  <ESD-Wyrk> that's cause you need to go outside to see one
  <ESD-Wyrk> most of them aren't 'online'


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906770
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.598646
text:
  <denshuu> I just spent the better part of four fuck hours
  trying to get on IRC from campus
  <denshuu> just to talk to you artards
  <Desu|Away> rawsome
  <whereisJ> What would you do without us?
  <denshuu> graduate


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906771
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.598717
text:
  <BombScare> i need to get my eyes lasered
  <eldee> ditto.. 2k per eye though
  <eldee> i'm saving my money for something i wont take for
  granted though :)
  <enos> i don't trust that eye laser surgery yet
  <enos> it'd be sweet tho to not need glasses or contacts
  <BombScare> i have an aunt that had it done, she loves it
  <BombScare> like 20 seconds and you can see
  <eldee> BombScare: damn.. i dont even think jesus was that
  fast
  <eldee> god bless america!
  <eldee> or something
  <BombScare> hah


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906771
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.598802
text:
  <raiden> Hey dude I think I left my gamecube there.
  <Khaniber> You didn't.
  <raiden> No I really think I did.  I've unpacked, searched my
  room a few times, and I can't find it.  I have my games and
  controllers, but not the cube.
  <Khaniber> You've been gone for a week.  I'm quite sure I
  would have noticed a large purple cube sitting in my own room!
  <raiden> Well I don't have it here, which means it has to be
  there.
  <Khaniber> I can tell you it's not.  I spend at least 4 hours
  awake in my room every day, I'm in and out of here throughout
  the day.  I eat here.  I sleep here.  If it were here, I would
  have seen it, and I'd be having nightmares of this purple
  Borg-ish cube foating above my entertainment center saying "We
  are Nintendo.  Your console features and game originality will
  added to our own.  Resistance is futile"
  <raiden> Just check your damn room for it!
  <Khaniber> Fine!  If it'll get you to quit whining.
  <raiden> yeah thanks
  <Khaniber> ...
  <Khaniber> Um...so when did you want to come by and pick it
  up?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906772
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.599032
text:
  <Dark_Fox> Kami: if you changed your name to Kame, you would
  have a much more interesting name :)
  <Kami> Dark_Fox: And if you changed yours to Dark_Fax, you'd
  have a more communicative name. :)
  * Dark_Fox is now known as Dark_Fax
  <Kami> It'd be... 'telecommunicative.'
  * Dark_Fax makes noises and bitches because he's out of paper
  ant toner *
  <Kami> Oh god, that happened at work today.
  <Dark_Fax> FEED MEE!!!
  <SailorV> Nuuuuuuuu
  * Dark_Fax displays wrong time *
  * Dark_Fax rings for no reason *
  * Kami is now known as VCR-clock
  * Dark_Fax gets a paper jam *
  * VCR-clock blinks
  * VCR-clock blinks
  * VCR-clock blinks
  * VCR-clock blinks
  * VCR-clock blinks
  * VCR-clock blinks
  <Dark_Fax> PAPPPERRRRR
  * VCR-clock blinks
  <Dark_Fax> TOOOOOONEEERRRR
  * VCR-clock blinks
  <VCR-clock> :)
  * Dark_Fax breaks a bearing and bounces around on the counter
  *
  <Dark_Fax> FEEEED ERROORRR!!!! NEED PAPER!!
  * Dark_Fax rings again for no reason *
  * VCR-clock blinks some more
  * SailorV runs and hides becuz there are weirdo's in here
  * Dark_Fax chases SailorV *  MY PAPER!!! MY PREEESCIOUUUS!!
  * VCR-clock blinks
  * VCR-clock blinks
  <SailorV> EEEE!
  * SailorV unplugs the VCR
  * VCR-clock has quit IRC
  * Dark_Fax is now known as Dark_Fox
  <Dark_Fox> ok i think ive peaked the humor of that


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906772
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.599099
text:
  <Coyote> ok I'm bored
  <Coyote> noir, can I telnet you?
  <Noir> why not
  <Coyote> Can i get you rroot and play in your filesystem?
  <Noir> why not
  <Coyote> wewt
  <Noir> just dont break anything
  <Coyote> oh don't worry
  <Coyote> I'll be gentle
  <Noir> k
  <Coyote> I'll slowly input keystrokes to your cli until you
  come to emacs


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906772
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.599179
text:
  <OO7MIKE> superconducting is how you turn a 3ghz processor
  into a 30ghz processor
  <OO7MIKE> which is my main research subject
  <Rukee> how do you get it that cold and keep it that cold?
  Liquid nitrogen?
  <pocketMidget> use a woman's heart as the heatsink
  * pocketMidget rimshot


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906773
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.599276
text:
  <astaroth> the other minor annoyance with this laptop is that
  the IRDa port keep changing the channel on the TV


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906773
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.599320
text:
  <involution> yeah, my code is so fucking clean, and looks
  wicked good
  <involution> but usually never works
  <archimedes> same here


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906774
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.599475
text:
  <phx> 230-Welcome to Leadtek Research Inc.
  <phx> 230-=^.^=
  <phx> 230 Anonymous user logged in.
  <phx> motherfucking anime smileys
  <phx> theyre everywhere
  <phx> i mean what is that?
  <phx> a dogs head with a iron rod shoved thru its head?
  <phx> i guess that explains it, its probably an asian delicacy


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906774
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.599528
text:
  <]S[John> why is cum white
  <]S[John> wonder if nigger cum is black
  <DARK-Lancelot> AFTER THAT
  <DARK-Lancelot> cum is white because its perfect, like the
  white race :-)
  <]S[Arkfear> HAHAHA john its not, ive sucked numerous black
  cocks in my time


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906775
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.599576
text:
  <zamros> WHEN I SAW IT I WANTED TO SHIT MY PANTS
  <zamros> THEN I REALIZED I WAS ON THE TOILET
  <zamros> SO I JUST SHIT RIGHT THERE


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906775
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.599631
text:
  <Ninja>  What if on the next smash there was online gameplay
  and for every bodies colors they could have different moves
  <TestRider>  What if a op barged in here and banned your ass?
  <Ninja>  oh really and who are you?
  <@McFox>  Apparently he's a psychic.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906776
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.599724
text:
  <NokiaFace> how would YOU like it if you got a nokia stuck on
  your face from a freak factory accident ?
  <NokiaFace> Everytime i get a phone call, my face vibrates do
  you know how painful that is ?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906776
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.599819
text:
  <DumbBitch> AND
  <DumbBitch> wtf am i not quoted on the quotes?
  <DumbBitch> i have to be one of the most funniest ppl in this
  channel :/


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906776
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.599879
text:
  <quintessential> HOLY SHIT! SOMEONE JUST FIRED A FIRECRACKER
  ONTO MY BALCNONY
  <kuntraver> heh
  <quintessential> i should close teh door, but its not a noisy
  one, its just a sparkler on steroids i tink
  <kuntraver> anyhoo, how are the submissions going?
  <quintessential> ok, i just uploaded a batch yesterday
  <quintessential> wtf
  <kuntraver> ?
  <quintessential> CRAP MY CAT IS ON FIRE!!!!!!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906777
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.599928
text:
  <seaster> this kid once said to me he was 10% gay and that he
  thought it was normal.
  <seaster> i said to him "it would suck if that 10% was your
  cock"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906777
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.600030
text:
  <Sca_li> I wouldn't really know what to do with a lot of money
  either...
  <Sca_li> I don't need much... a house, a car, a maid, a pool,
  a golf course, a tennis court, soccer stadium (indoor)...


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906779
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.600080
text:
  <mash> these fuckin contractors
  <chad> again, I know you are trying to be politically correct,
  but just call them hookers


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906779
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.600215
text:
  <Yellah> Celebrate the decrimalisation of Pot
  <[Piratez]> lets make this national
  * [Piratez] replaces the maple leaf on the Canadian flag with
  a weed leaf.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906780
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.600362
text:
  <Guest56750> Hi how do you change your name?
  <Guest56750> iam new to mirc
  <Guest69> type "/nick nickname"
  *** Guest56750 is now known as nickname


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906780
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.600411
text:
  <lyfe> i just don't keep a fucking book with the names of all
  the girls who've had their dick in my mouth


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906781
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.600458
text:
  <joesboxd3b> it is just ironic.... you can't get the cvs
  version of cvs unless you get the older version of cvs then
  cvs to the cvs server to get the latest cvs version of cvs


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906781
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.600520
text:
  <Hurricane_Hasney> fuck... that was not good
  <Hurricane_Hasney> I put on winamp and added my MP3 directory
  <ragnarok2040> O_O, winamp3
  <Hurricane_Hasney> Forgetting that it has porn videos in it
  <ragnarok2040> heh
  <Hurricane_Hasney> I had ePSXe running as well full screen so
  there I am chatting away to my mum and playing Tekken
  <Hurricane_Hasney> One of my songs finish and all you hear is
  "Uh, uh, mmm, right there"
  <ragnarok2040> LMAO
  <Hurricane_Hasney> so a quick stab of the reset button was
  inorder


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906781
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.600571
text:
  <Tobywrk> i want that internet fridge!!!!!!!
  <Tobywrk> you set up a chair
  <Tobywrk> beat off while watching porn
  <Tobywrk> open it up and get a beer


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906782
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.600619
text:
  <MikeSweetser> FWIW, 1/1/2003 is essentially the 20th
  anniversary of the Internet.
  <MikeSweetser> Basically, the day that ARPANET switched its
  protocol to TCP/IP.
  <kuribo> MikeSweetser: in unrelated news, 1/2/2003 is the 20th
  anniversary of warez :)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906782
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.600688
text:
  <EvILEyE{GF}> I tried getting my scanner to work
  <EvILEyE{GF}> stupid prick machine doesn't work with win2k
  <EvILEyE{GF}> only works with linux, OSX, and pre-winME OS's
  (drivers)
  <EvILEyE{GF}> so I tried it on my laptop and linux broke
  <EvILEyE{GF}> so I tried installing win98 on it
  <EvILEyE{GF}> win98 broke
  <EvILEyE{GF}> it's outside on the front lawn now
  <EvILEyE{GF}> I figured I could format the hard drive by
  throwing it out the window
  <Kaown> It'd leave a footprint on the ground, but that's about
  all.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906782
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.600779
text:
  <Ken|JLime> Jtag_me If you want a challenge, learn the emacs
  short commands
  <Ken|JLime> I'll stick to medical school myself
  <Jtag_me> haha
  <Ken|JLime> Its like CTRL-XYWZQFGUJ-F1 (while pressing F2)..
  and it walks your dog


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906783
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.600879
text:
  <WoobiE> hey.. i see me in that pic!
  <WoobiE> hooray for me
  <jimiw> your mum must be proud
  <WoobiE> yep
  <WoobiE> doesnt explain why she beats me and tells me i
  destroyed the family though


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906783
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.600932
text:
  <RunningRed> Actually, I'd love a tattoo over my belly and
  groin that looks like Uncle Sam from the Army's old "We want
  you" campaign, with my dick replacing his index finger
  <RunningRed> Sort of a 3-D version


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906783
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.600982
text:
  <h3123t1c> we at IRC protection use AOL often
  <h3123t1c> it more organized
  <_Godless_> Of course, because .5k/s, constant drop-offs and
  and $24 for a sub$10 service is "organized"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906784
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.601123
text:
  <TripleRach> But really I could never find abortion acceptable
  because I don't know I have all this maternally love stuff and
  I want to have lots of kids someday
  <ksennin> TripleRach, I can help you.
  <ksennin> I happen to be producing upwards of 1,000 sperms per
  second.
  <TripleRach> ...
  <ksennin> Hypothetically, I could double the world's
  population in a couple of weeks.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906785
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.601185
text:
  * FlipTopBx crosses his fingers
  <FlipTopBx> pleeeease snow.  ;-)
  <mightyflo> people have stuff to do tomorrow. stuff they've
  been looking forward to for a long time. snow would be bad.
  <FlipTopBx> oh, that party is tomorrow, isn't it.
  <FlipTopBx> where's he live?
  <mightyflo> the land of kirk
  <FlipTopBx> i'll make arrangements for it not to snow in that
  area then


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906785
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.601231
text:
  <Vikki> everyone send me more pics of you all :)
  <Vikki> lag lag lag lag lag lag lag lag lag lag
  * Vikki was kicked by Vikki (stop flooding)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906785
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.601323
text:
  <BlueStar> my dad used to leave the dish on the porn channels
  <BlueStar> so i'd turn it on and there'd be porn
  <BlueStar> i was always like "augh!!"
  <hotdogcore> eww
  <BlueStar> then i discovered the internet... haha.
  <hotdogcore> ta da
  <hotdogcore> !
  <BlueStar> my mom walks in as I've got like 10 windows of BME
  hard open
  <BlueStar> I'm usin win 98 at that time
  <hotdogcore> ahahahaha
  <BlueStar> so i try to click the desktop icon
  <BlueStar> and its too slow
  <BlueStar> so i turn my computer off
  <BlueStar> she yelled at me: "you're going to get bad sectors!
  if you're looking at porn you dont' want me to see, turn off
  your monitor!"
  <BlueStar> ....I got bad sectors.
  <mal> HAHAHAHAHA
  <hotdogcore> bahaha


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906785
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.601365
text:
  * Sunblade slowly turns insane.
  * Tron is already quite mad.
  * Lion-O starts to feel quite at home :-)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906786
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.601429
text:
  <CanyonMan> should it disturb me that the can of campbell's
  baked beans
  is labeled: "Now with more beans!"  ?
  <CanyonMan> It's still a 12 ounce can
  <CanyonMan> So they must have REMOVED something to have the
  same weight and volume, but more beans?
  <waltman> maybe they're using smaller beans


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906787
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.601590
text:
  <DooD> what's your BMI assnugget?
  <synthetiq> 25
  <DooD> fatass
  <synthetiq> i have a large upper body
  <DooD> so you have manboobs?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906787
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.601767
text:
  <Kuiper> Well, it rained today, but as a whole it's been
  warmer than it was last week.
  <kikuichimonji> Why does it seem like every time you join this
  channel, you end up talking about the weather?
  <kikuichimonji> Is your life so unimaginably dull that you
  can't think of any events in your life to describe that might
  be more interesting than the weather?
  <kikuichimonji> Let's think of something for you to talk about
  other than the weather.
  <kikuichimonji> I mean, we barely even know anything about
  you, other than where you live.
  <kikuichimonji> Let's start there.  What do you do for a
  living?
  <Kuiper> I'm a meteorologist.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906788
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.601850
text:
  <Mank> I missed about half of the movie
  <Mank> If you catch my drift
  <waffle> Mank: stop with the public masterbastion


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906788
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.601923
text:
  TriPod11: bush ain't THAT bad...he kinda knows what he's doin
  idaredbeet08: Please, Monica Lewenski had more President in
  her than George Bush ever will.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906788
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.602003
text:
  <+perl> nerve trauma to the arm is nice
  <+sm4k[X-D]> sounds like it
  <+perl> im just happy i can still use my hand
  <+[TC]Quicksilver> Yeah, I bet your penis is too


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906788
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.602095
text:
  <Jugernaut> CLICK CLICK BOOM
  <Jugernaut> today is pop metal day
  <kaleido> haha
  <kaleido> i like to refer to it as 'aluminum music'
  <kaleido> since its not as strong as metal
  <kaleido> and it will eventually fold up and be thrown out


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906789
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.602147
text:
  <MeTh|pizzza> ack! i think some1 is tryin 2 break into my
  house! i just saw a kladder go by the window...
  <ddrfreak> really?
  <MeTh|pizzza> in other chan...
  <ddrfreak> somoene is trying to break into your house in the
  other channel?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906789
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.602198
text:
  <mrlogic> you know, for a moment I misread this headline:
  "Bush and Kerry Hit Road, Trade Blows on Jobs"
  <lordandrei> And yet, they still oppose Gay Marriage
  <mrlogic> imagine


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906789
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.602248
text:
  <Noname_MiB> well im outta here, gotta go play RL, theres an
  event called turkey day ahppening, later
  <Crembo> RL? I think I downloaded that once but it has bad
  reviews and a shitty community.
  <Murph> but RL has sex
  <Crembo> so do hentai games.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906790
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.602295
text:
  SquallBane: True gamers don't need controllers/keyboards/mice.
  SquallBane: They memorize the game and play it in their head.
  blindpyro: wtf.
  blindpyro: then how do you play mulplayer.
  SquallBane: You get three friends to sit in the same room and
  rattle off verbose descriptions of what's happening.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906790
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.602353
text:
  <robbie> :D\-<
  * robbie was kicked by c-rOCK (punch.)
  * robbie has joined #geekissues
  <@c-rOCK> wheres your precious -user now? muahahahahahahaha
  <robbie> hey im not +fag anymore
  <robbie> whats that?
  <The_Llama> something is awry
  <robbie> what does awry mean?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906790
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.602402
text:
  * jitspoe attempts to go back to his paper
  <DaveMan> BWAHAHAHA
  <DaveMan> ALL YOUR CONCENTRATION ARE BELONG TO IRC
  <DaveMan> YOU HAVE NO CHANCE TO PASS MAKE YOUR BURGER FLIPPING


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906790
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.602455
text:
  <theclubhousebarandgrillgod> i have a ????? who is the admin
  here
  <Kyle> You have a horse?
  <jeff> I'd like to buy a vowel.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906791
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.602519
text:
  <Onizuka> ^captain_planet
  * UB3R-B0T is now known as Kwame
  <Kwame> EARTH
  * Kwame is now known as Wheeler
  <Wheeler> FIRE
  * Wheeler is now known as Linka
  <Linka> WIND
  * Linka is now known as Gi
  <Gi> WATER
  * Gi was kicked by Xeiliex (Xeiliex)
  * Gi has joined #jasio
  * Gi is now known as Ma-ti
  <Ma-ti> HEART
  * Ma-ti is now known as Everyone
  <Everyone> GO PLANET
  * Everyone is now known as anonymous
  <anonymous> BY YOUR POWERS COMBINED...
  * anonymous is now known as Captain_Planet
  <Captain_Planet> I AM CAPTAIN PLANET
  <Moiph> YAAAAAY
  <Xeiliex> Moiph, NEVER AGAIN


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906791
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.602570
text:
  <st|ng-x> sammy try this, you have a 50/50 chance at getting
  very ahead...walk into boss' office and yell at him "you SICK
  FUCK...gimme a promotion and a serious raise now or I'll tell
  your wife everything I saw" then walk out not leaving him a
  chance to retort


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906791
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.602618
text:
  <Nanobot> I wish I had a girlfriend...
  <Nanobot> My only friend is a sock puppet
  <Nanobot> Lucky for me though, it has a hole in it


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906792
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.602669
text:
  <Cole> you totally blew me off for beards!
  <@Pugh> i'd never blow a guy with a beard!
  <@Pugh> erm...i mean a guy...full stop


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906792
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.602715
text:
  <clay> i heard joey submitted the first rfc for irc
  <clay> something along the lines of D00D WE NEED WAREZ TRADING
  2 ORGANIZE N SHIT


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906792
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.602765
text:
  <loo> every fucking bj should be two-handed
  <mit3> actually it pretty much depends.
  <mit3> like what if you ask the girl to choke herself.
  <mit3> you gotta pick your poison


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906793
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.602914
text:
  Govind: once I saw a sign that said "Parking for Drive-Thru
  customers only". that was the stupidest thing I'd ever read
  until I read Harry Potter and the Cursed Child


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906793
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.602977
text:
  <Geno> What Brandon needs, is BATTLEFIELD 1942.
  <Brandon64> Geno, I GOT IT!
  <Geno> hooray!
  <Brandon64> I bought it Thursday!  You wanna play?  Give me a
  server
  <Geno> 159.234.141.275 14567
  <Brandon64> I'm just kidding, I didn't buy it.  And I probably
  never will.  Hahahaha
  <Geno> Once again you tear my heart in two.
  <Brandon64> It's fun


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906793
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.603025
text:
  <Vampirate> Wow, I maxxed out the mem card in my camera for
  the first time today
  <Vampirate> My daughters dance team was performing in the
  state/national dance championships today.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906794
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.603133
text:
  <thinkmad> your face sucks
  <thinkmad> watch my movie
  <thinkmad> http://www.thinkmad.com/tvp/tvp/Media/
  Meetyou_lo_320x240.mov
  <Hummer> thats good advertising
  <Hummer> start off with an insult. always works
  <Drakken> FUCK YOU ALL - Buy Crest toothpaste!
  <Hummer> hahah
  <golic3> He got your attention though
  <Hummer> true
  <Hummer> EAT SHIT! go to mcdonalds!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906794
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.603185
text:
  <K-sPecial> i'm trying to fork a server connection for every
  client that connects
  <K-sPecial> although i dont want to writ 200 forks down my
  main perl script
  <fxn> K-sPecial: you can limit your childs if you want
  <rastakid> fxn: By using protection you mean?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906795
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.603233
text:
  <gilm0re> I wanna make a movie called "I Rock Your Mom" and
  make it a story about a child who has to triumph over
  constipation and an erectile disfunction.
  <TJ32> ahh.. an autobiography


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906795
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.603289
text:
  miLKm4n2kj: there's a police scanner in my room at work
  miLKm4n2kj: it's fun to listen to
  miLKm4n2kj: it would be more fun if i could memorize this
  police code
  IcEmanhAxx0r: lol
  IcEmanhAxx0r: look at this one
  IcEmanhAxx0r: 11-25X Female motorist needs assistance
  miLKm4n2kj: that seems rather specific doesn't it?
  miLKm4n2kj: 11-25Y = male?
  IcEmanhAxx0r: it doesn't have it
  miLKm4n2kj: of course
  miLKm4n2kj: male motorists don't need assistance


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906795
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.603332
text:
  diggertrocknroll: Graham, my girlfriend just listed bukkake as
  one of the top five ways to kill a man
  diggertrocknroll: I blame you
  Grahamenstein: why me?
  Grahamenstein: there were four other guys


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906795
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.603391
text:
  *** CitizenC changes topic to 'Slippers, all of you <-- But
  aren't slippers comfy? <=- no <-- You must have beta slippers
  then.'
  (@d-_-b): CitizenC: yeah, Slippers v0.05b is full of bugs
  (@CitizenC): Stupid beta slippers. When is the sole not going
  to have these huge holes in them?
  (@CitizenC): I reported that bug when I first got this build.
  (@frOsty-): CitizenC: i just got Slippers v0.07a, cvs from
  last night.
  (@frOsty-): CitizenC: they're fucking hot man, seriously.
  (@frOsty-): CitizenC: new silk insole, fluffy toes.
  (@d-_-b): frOsty-: did they fix the backdoor?
  (@frOsty-): CitizenC: and i don't fall down on the hardwood
  anymore. Crash constantly on the concrete, unfortunatly.
  (@frOsty-): d-_-b: yeah, it's all fixed. they have a velcro
  flap now.
  (@frOsty-): d-_-b: but it's only the hook side right now, not
  the soft side.
  (@frOsty-): d-_-b: so i had to hand-compile some tape for it.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906796
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.603443
text:
  <Blackmail> I didn't learn to masturbate until I was 17... up
  until then I always thought 'masturbation' was a type of pasta
  dish they served in fancy restaurants


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906796
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.603490
text:
  <Bobman> Im gonna take the catalytic converter off my car,
  bend the muffler to the side and rig a spark plug on the
  inside
  <Bobman> Drive-by flamethrower


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906796
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.603532
text:
  --- noddy has changed the topic to: #Troll, troll, troll your
  post, Gently down the feed. Merrily, merrily troll along, A
  life is what you need!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906797
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.603585
text:
  <Huge_Spatula> I wanted to submit a mistake from "The Man in
  the Iron Mask" to www.moviemistakes.com that said, "Watch the
  scenes that feature Leanardo Dicapprio carefully. He can't
  act."


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906797
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.603637
text:
  <+Tre> how do I get girls to have sex with me?
  <+sp00n> show them software you have written..woman go wild
  for that kind of stuff
  <+Tre> for real? how should i show them? do I carry my laptop
  around and show random woman??


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906797
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.603691
text:
  <+timmo> i uploaded 146mb yesterday
  <+RushMore> i have downloaded 1,174.19mb in 1day 4hours
  <+Kuro_> that's 1.68kbps, timmo
  <+Kuro_> for 24 hours
  <+Kuro_> not too fast, but persistent like a nigger trying to
  get out of a well


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906797
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.603742
text:
  <Red_Sky> It must have been a slow newsday. The headline for
  today's paper is 'Suicide Bomber Killed'.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906798
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.603788
text:
  <ineffable> i hear semen is an acquired taste too
  <Hunter> speaking of which, i havent had a drink in more than
  a month


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906798
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.603831
text:
  SherbyCool: not tuesday
  exeblah: ok
  exeblah: um
  SherbyCool: tuesday the world ends
  exeblah: wednesday?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906798
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.603873
text:
  DraZ: Well, except Elmo
  DraZ: They even made a toy so that when you touched him, he
  had convulstions.
  NeoNess: I thought it was Orgasms
  NeoNess: THAT TICKLES


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906799
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.603975
text:
  <aqela> YES!
  ùíù mode/#mandrake [+v nomercy] by level
  <aqela> my linux came
  <aqela> yes!
  <[Mosher]> did yah get any on you ?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906799
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.604037
text:
  <panacea_> im going to the doctor tomorrow morning regarding
  my thumb
  <Lordaerom> panacea_, so much fucking wanking


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906800
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.604180
text:
  <doogul> he can kline but he can't kill? wtf? lol
  <doogul> that's like being able to jack off but you can't take
  your pants off


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906800
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.604236
text:
  <Trendarth> wb
  <Yamatto> ta
  <Trendarth> np
  <@antix> why does everyone talk in two letters these days...
  <Trendarth> dk
  <Trendarth> because our society promotes slothenly behaviour
  <@antix> ok


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906801
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.604299
text:
  <Casper> Thursday I think I may steal the camaro and go get my
  haircut.
  <Phucker> Is it a mullet?
  <Casper> My brother's camaro is awesome.
  <Phucker> For a second there I thought 'camaro' said 'mullet'
  <Phucker> I don't think the two terms can be seperated


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906801
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.604341
text:
  (@ThinG|webbing) how do I zoom in with internet explorer?
  (+|Sonic) move your face closer to the screen


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906801
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.604386
text:
  (rusty): You know....
  (rusty): Those police officers must have had this happen to
  them....
  (rusty): Cop: We have a red blur going pass us at -ERR MPH on
  the speed radar... please advise


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906802
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.604510
text:
  <pantsme> guys, give me ways the govt influences your life
  daily
  <pantsme> i need 3 more
  <Novasol> what do you have already?
  <grendy> increased taxes due to multiple simultaneous wars,
  and slightly lower gas price3s thanks to stolen oil?
  <grendy> or should i just shut up? my head hurts
  <pantsme> i got the basics i just need a few others
  <pantsme> make stuff up
  <grendy> predator
  <GoatLord> how about: They make laws that say I can't beat
  that stupid fucker with a tire iron.
  <redsleep> reading my thoughts through major league baseball
  <grendy> uh, the illuminati, the skull & crossbones, the
  magestic twelve?
  <pantsme> nice
  <pantsme> askin this on irc was dumb
  <pantsme> :D
  <GoatLord> you think?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906802
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.604573
text:
  <Nemo> whoa
  <Nemo> i was like downstars
  <Nemo> making a sandwich
  <Nemo> and i started singing subconsciously
  <Nemo> and when i realized that i was making noises
  <Nemo> it turned out i was like screaming the theme song to
  crank yankers
  <Nemo> and like
  <Nemo> the lady next door called the cops and shit
  <Nemo> oh man
  <Nemo> :(


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906803
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.604661
text:
  {+GhETToHooLIgAn|CM} soemtime
  {+GhETToHooLIgAn|CM} or get huge ass fan
  {+GhETToHooLIgAn|CM} :D
  {@III-wiz} quiet*
  {@III-wiz} wiz*
  {+GhETToHooLIgAn|CM} wel ima putt a courq in yer moth
  {+GhETToHooLIgAn|CM} :D
  {@III-wiz} cork*
  {@III-wiz} mouth*
  {@III-wiz} pu...fuckit
  {+GhETToHooLIgAn|CM} put*
  {+GhETToHooLIgAn|CM} gedez
  {@Stoner-EH} yer ferkin nutz whiz
  {+GhETToHooLIgAn|CM} where idd u take eglsh?
  {@Stoner-EH} engish?
  {@Stoner-EH} err
  {@Stoner-EH} engrish
  {+GhETToHooLIgAn|CM} i tink dis es besh.org materl


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906803
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.604734
text:
  <wilywampa> dazey said i'm almost out of money and said i need
  to get a job
  <wilywampa> i said i could steal money instead
  <wilywampa> and she asked from whom
  <wilywampa> i said "from old ladies, i can steal their money
  and beat them to death"
  <wilywampa> and she said "that's awful, why would you do
  something like that?"
  <wilywampa> i said "because babies don't have money"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906804
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.604781
text:
  * gjinn[a] points to his atheist side
  * EmersonOw points to his love for underaged boys
  <EmersonOw> i mean my catholic side


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906805
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.604919
text:
  <mranostay> I have this dream of hiring a hooker, and when she
  asks what I want done, one word "Cronjob".


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906805
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.605017
text:
  <Santa> all these chocolate bullets
  <Biscram> isnt there something you're forgetting to do tonight
  santa
  <Santa> THE PRESENTS!?
  * Santa is away, (brb delivering presents)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906806
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.605109
text:
  <Nookadum> I need to learn html can anyone help?
  <Blar> Sure. Just put this on your webpage and when you go
  there a cool editor for it will come up - N<br>o<BR>o<BR>k<BR>
  a<BR>d<BR>u<BR>m<BR><BR>S<BR>u<BR>c<BR>k<BR>s<BR><BR>C<BR>o
  <BR>c<BR>k.
  <Nookadum> Thanks.
  * Nookadum has quit IRC (Quit: Off to work on my webpage. ^-^)

  Some time later.

  * Nookadum has joined #Megatokyo
  <Nookadum> Hey! Fuck you!
  <Blar> Alright. I forgot to tell you, you have to press F4 for
  it to work. That message is just protecting the secret of the
  editor.
  <Nookadum> Oh.. Alright.
  * Nookadum has quit IRC (Connection reset by client)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906806
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.605162
text:
  Dudespunk7: 90% of domestic abuse happens due to shitty compaq
  products.
  Dudespunk7: They don't want to ruin their expensive shit so
  they take it out on the wife, or kids.
  Famethrow1: and because that bitch doesn't vacuum.
  Dudespunk7: Exactly.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906806
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.605230
text:
  <Alex> Mosser!
  <Alex> heh
  <Alex> I've been there
  <Alex> always the private bath though
  <MrSmartass> Sounds like the Hotel Edison in NYC.
  <grue> how did I read that as "pirate bath"?
  <Alex> is there a fetish you're trying to repress?
  <grue> Could be
  <grue> I think the mental idea of Keira Knightley in a bathtub
  is what did it
  <grue> "Avast, lass! Prepare to be boarded!"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906807
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.605276
text:
  <lostmx89> ok i like this torrent thing but when you turn off
  your computer how do you make sure it is still downlowding


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906807
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.605327
text:
  <Orian> Due to typing classes when I was six I have the
  keyboard memorized for the most part :P
  <RedComet> Ori: somebody ever told you you need a life?
  <Orian> Yes quite often
  <BlackMage> did you ever ask what the url was?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906807
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.605372
text:
  <Aurican> i remember when GavJCD tried to nuke me...word nuke
  in a private msg....he eventually flooded himself off


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906807
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.605422
text:
  <Anonymous> Last night, Helen and I were sitting in the living
  room, and I said to her, "I never want to live in a vegetative
  state, dependent on some machine and fluids from a bottle. If
  that ever happens, just pull the plug." She got up, unplugged
  the TV, and threw out my beer.
  <Anonymous> She's such a bitch.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906808
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.605475
text:
  <@Sadist> http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/e/ef/
  Age_of_Consent.png
  <@Sadist> data for age of consent all around the world.
  <Dano> Is that in your bookmarks?
  <@Sadist> its my home page


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906808
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.605527
text:
  <Kanako> That's right kids. Unlike most of the Linux solutions
  out there, Cinelerra requires no emulation of proprietary
  operating systems, no commercial add-ons, no banner
  advertizements, no corporate dependancies, no terrorists, just
  pure, raw, hot blooded Linux boxes.
  <Kanako> ^--- It does, however, require walking through hell,
  fighting Satan himself, and saving the princess in the other
  room.
  <Neo1337> Just to find out the princess is in another
  castle...


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906809
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.605713
text:
  <mnsnsan> fourteen is legal in canada <chrizto> with the
  exchange rate, that makes the legal limit like, 5 in the us


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906810
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.605770
text:
  <|404notfound> when you play DDR, you're dancing with SATAN
  <|404notfound> unless, you know, you're doing two player
  <|404notfound> because then Satan doesn't have room to play


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906810
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.605830
text:
  <redwyre> kez said you you are a whiney bitch
  <TraumaPony> Haha
  <redwyre> and that you smell
  <TraumaPony> Heh
  <redwyre> and that you're gay
  <TraumaPony> Lol
  <redwyre> and that you like visual basic
  <TraumaPony> THAT CUNT


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906810
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.605885
text:
  <Bell> It's amazing how many kinds of crumbs you find when
  cleaning your keyboard, I've found
  <Bell> I even found a couple of dead ants.
  <Bell> I'm assuming they perished while trying to retrieve
  said crumbs.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906810
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.605937
text:
  * Luigi30 sets mode -mirc.lameness #gamecube
  * You were kicked by Xenobyte (colors/gay script)
  * Attempting to rejoin channel #gamecube
  * Rejoined channel #gamecube
  <Luigi30> How can a script be gay?
  <Luigi30> Scripts are asexual
  <Luigi30> :P
  * You were kicked by Xenobyte (General Lameness)
  * Attempting to rejoin channel #gamecube
  * Rejoined channel #gamecube
  <Luigi30> That's better.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906811
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.605984
text:
  truthug17: so u have a man
  Cassandra: Oh yes.
  truthug17: do u love him
  Cassandra: I do.
  truthug17: could u love me
  Cassandra: I might. But I'd never sleep with you, so I guess
  it doesn't matter.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906811
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.606032
text:
  <greg> You know what's wrong with this channel, Nathan buys
  laptops and scotch, and you people ask him what kind of
  laptops.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906811
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.606082
text:
  <chintss> how do i configure ftp http and telnet  in RH 8.0
  <chintss> plzzzzz
  <tictac> chintss: rtfm
  <chintss> tictac : rtfm: command not found


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906812
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.606130
text:
  <vergil> you know you have issues when you almost tell your
  mom to delete something rather than throw it away


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906812
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.606224
text:
  <Megumi> hahaha ASL nate :P
  <NtG> yourage + 1/if you = female { me = male } else { me =
  female }/surrey


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906812
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.606298
text:
  *** Joins: KillerClo (forder@wlc141.cablelan.net) has joined #
  EFnet
  <KillerClo> oh my god I'm on Efnet
  <KillerClo> thank you god
  <KillerClo> finally
  <KillerClo> I thought they banned me from the network
  <KillerClo> but I just had a problem with my ISP's dealing
  with the reverse DNS
  <KillerClo> holey crap
  <KillerClo> I haven't been on Efnet in a year
  <KillerClo> this is a big night
  <KillerClo> THANK YOU GOD
  <KillerClo> YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
  <KillerClo> WOOOOOOOOOOOHOOOOOOOOOOOOO
  *** Parts: KillerClo (forder@wlc141.cablelan.net) has left #
  EFnet


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906813
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.606353
text:
  Topic is 'Your mom has sex with sharks.' *** <Drewtig> oh
  SHIT, that's fucked up =D * Drewtig 's mom read that, and
  said: "Yeah, but he was more like a weasel that thought he was
  a shark."


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906813
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.606396
text:
  ( dvast8 ) so if a tattoo gets you friends, what gets you
  laid?
  ( jesusprime ) military outfits
  ( jesusprime ) or a loud car
  ( dvast8 ) i think your getting laid by the wrong sex


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906813
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.606473
text:
  <Abstruse> Bush: Iraq, you'd better get rid of your nuclear
  weapons or we'll bomb you!  Iraq: We don't have any nuclear
  weapons.  N Korea: We do.  Bush: Well then get rid of your
  chemical weapons!  Iraq: We don't have those either!  N Korea:
  Ummm...we have nukes now.  Bush: We KNOW you've got chemical
  and nuclear weapons!  Get rid of them!  Iraq: Even if we did,
  which we don't, we can't even hit the USA!  N Korea: We can
  nuke California all we want.
  <Abstruse> Bush: Shuddup North Korea, no one cares!  Iraq,
  you'd BETTER disarm!  Iraq: But we don't HAVE anything!  N
  Korea: Oh fuck it, blow up Los Angelas...  Bush: Iraq, I'm
  warning you...  *BOOM*
  <doppelganger> bush: "we are sick and tired of your missiles
  hitting us, iraq...but we cant understand why they are flying
  in from the pacific ocean!"  north korea: "he CAN'T be that
  stupid."  saddam: apparently he is.  i myself havent even made
  any missile that goes beyond walking distance."


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906814
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.606515
text:
  [2:22p] quits.. YT[Ping timeout]
  [2:24p] joins.. YT
  [2:24p] (Orion) wb
  [2:24p] (Phae) wb
  [2:24p] (YT) you know when you get real excited and
  accidentally pull out a plug?
  [2:24p] (Phae) haha
  [2:24p] (YT) with your toe
  [2:24p] (Phae) yeah


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906814
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.606560
text:
  <CompuMan> The tragedy of Canada is they could have had
  British culture, French cooking, and American technology, but
  instead they got American culture, British cooking, and French
  technology.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906814
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.606624
text:
  <chrysOUT> bye =D peace and love!!!
  <Sarutobi> peace & cookies, tyne
  <Sarutobi> be safe :]
  <chrysOUT> ***poOf***
  <djglitch> she's not gone
  <djglitch> she's addicted
  <djglitch> ;)
  <chrysOUT> die
  <djglitch> hahahahaha


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906814
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.606673
text:
  <@k1ck-Paulh4x> ROFL MY GRANDMA HAS BEEN OUT AND BOUGHT
  HERSELF COD4!!!!
  <@k1ck-Paulh4x> cant wait to own her on a server =p
  <@k1ck-Paulh4x> and call her a silly bitch


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906815
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.606772
text:
  <ue-Soul_Chaser> yeah sniper, normally, you can't stick your
  penis all the way unless you would want to rip her cervix
  apart
  <ue-Soul_Chaser> or, in your case, his rectum


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906815
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.606829
text:
  <Razhal> The internet is a beautiful place....
  <Razhal> Because no matter what kind of twisted freak you are,
  you've got a friend out there :D
  <Razhal> You could ask the internet "Find people who have sex
  with goats on fire."
  <Razhal> And internet will ask you, "What kind of goats?"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906816
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.606883
text:
  <dreamer> Gargamale: a girl that posts on the local goth forum
  used to think lol meant lots of love, and got a rather rude
  awakening after someone's mother died - "how was the funeral?
  lol"
  <Jesterace> haha
  <Gargamale> LOL


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906816
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.606934
text:
  <Sundancer> DE: "The truth is out there" :)
  <DarkElf> sunny: yeah, thank god it's out there and not in
  here with us


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906816
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.606993
text:
  <MightyBlueJustice> I need to jack a hole in this floor so I
  can get the internet hooked up to the comp in the basement.
  <MightyBlueJustice> I need more power tools
  <MKDemon> You don't have a drill?
  <MightyBlueJustice> We do somewhere.
  <MightyBlueJustice> All I can find is a power sander and I
  just don't have that kind of time.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906816
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.607044
text:
  <Azemilcar> What do you Brits say when you stereotype American
  speech?
  <Starblaydia> anything lacking irony or sarcasm usually
  qualifies, Azemilcar
  <Gala|drunk> *nod*
  <Yamatto> or we just hoot like gibbons and invade sandy
  countries.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906817
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.607100
text:
  <Rossell1> weird thing happened last night
  <Rossell1> I had a dream where I was on IRC
  <Rossell1> and everybody kept saying potatoes
  <ASk> potatoes
  <Winquman> potatoes
  <Rossell1> :/
  <Phobius> Tomato


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906817
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.607156
text:
  <MoonlightShadow> I'm exhausted and as a result of that, sick
  <BlueTicona> pms moon
  <MoonlightShadow> I do not have pms!
  <BlueTicona> no
  <BlueTicona> i mean pm's


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906817
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.607208
text:
  <#seattle/weezel> This End-User License is an agreement
  between Microsoft Corporation (hereafter referred to as
  "Microsoft") and you, the end-user (hereafter referred to as
  "our bitch").


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906817
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.607265
text:
  <enrol> pure fucking godfather of IDM
  <jj_> whats IDM
  <jj_> is it
  <jj_> INTENSIVE DICK MAINTENANCE
  <enrol> intelligent dance music
  <jj_> oh
  <jj_> close enough


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906818
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.607333
text:
  <RichiH> talking of netBSD - someone has a spare toaster to
  test 1.6?
  <mirabile> lol toaster
  <mirabile> you know them :)
  <RichiH> you just wait...
  <RichiH> some day they will support toasters and washing
  machines
  <Tschechow> "a toaster can be on or off, so it has at least
  one bit, so netbsd should boot on it."
  * RichiH 's mental eye sees a toaster's heating elements glow
  morse code
  <mirabile> lol
  <zinx> they already do, you just need the right brand
  <RichiH> or it could punch the toast


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906818
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.607385
text:
  <Blue^_> xach
  <Blue^_> wanna bw later?><
  <Ershin> OK
  <Date`Kyosuke> That almost sounds indecent. :o


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906819
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.607494
text:
  *** BlackDeth (xxdethxx@res135a-026.rh.rit.edu) has joined #
  snogs
  <tyne> uh
  <tyne> who are u?
  <matts> BlackDeth on #snogs @#songs
  <BlackDeth> hypr told me to do it
  <BlackDeth> i dont know how well you guys know him
  <BlackDeth> but you probably realize he isn't the greatest
  typer/speller!
  <matts> HAHAHA
  <hypr> shut up flamer
  <BlackDeth> so i joined #songs first when he said #snogs


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906819
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.607541
text:
  duckstab: Oh and as if i'm the only guy that'd ask God for a
  handjob. He INVENTED the penis, guys.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906820
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.607641
text:
  <DigDug> <nowakow> does anyone want to teach a horny female to
  masturbate to orgasm?
  <DigDug> Approve Kill Nothing
  <orion> kill;
  <jestuh> kill
  <jestuh> if she's horny she knows what to do


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906820
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.607683
text:
  expyro: I loved setting those things that came in the packages
  on fire. THey would ignite, then explode. Then on exploded in
  my hair. It wasnt funny anymore


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906820
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.607754
text:
  <myhero> I think this is what I wanted to say, or something
  like this
  <myhero> how about making a holiday the opposite of
  thanksgiving
  <myhero> where your a bitch and hate everything in the world
  for one day
  <myhero> that's what I did today
  <myhero> it felt great
  <Tik-Tok> that doesn't need to be a holiday
  <Tik-Tok> most people are like that day to day
  <myhero> yeah maybe
  <myhero> well on this holiday, how about people try just a
  little bit harder to hate people
  <myhero> ya know, in the spirit of the holiday
  <myhero> hate people a little bit more


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906820
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.607797
text:
  tavilach: i could just block you now
  tavilach: and never
  tavilach: talk to u again
  tavilach: but no
  tavilach: i need help with samba
  CzarDerivative: you asshole


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906821
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.607896
text:
  <@shp> you think when we are older we will all sit in irc and
  say stuff like "remember when we were young and drinks were
  cheap and priests could molest young boys?"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906821
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.607952
text:
  <jgannon> Quicktime 0wnz... if you have a Mac. :-)
  <PatrickD> so where can I go to download a Mac? ;-)
  <jgannon> PatrickD: www.goatse.cx
  <jgannon> Wow... I haven't said THAT in a long time.
  <PatrickD> somehow that version of the Mac never worked well
  for me
  <jgannon> Yeah... too many wide open ports.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906822
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.607996
text:
  kydruid: actually Laura Bush is working undercover for the
  DEA... every gram she snorts is another off the street.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906822
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.608054
text:
  <imsuxok> Maybe there'll be some breakthrough in internet
  technology
  <imsuxok> I hear the powerline stuff is close to being
  released commercially
  <imsuxok> I'm just worried that it'll overload the outlets in
  my old house. I don't feel like burning to death just so I can
  download porn faster.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906822
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.608110
text:
  <Ecob16> so this hobo asks me for spare change right
  <Ecob16> and i ignore her cause im chatting with a mate
  <Ecob16> so shes like "manners dont cost anything"
  <Ecob16> so i turn to her and say "yeah, but if they did I
  could afford them" :D
  <Ecob16> you shud have seen her expression...


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906822
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.608157
text:
  * Jbond64 yawns
  * darkcloud stuffs a sock in Jbond's mouth
  <waffle> darkcloud: you misspelled cock


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906823
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.608234
text:
  <arry75> hi
  <Aethelwulf> ?
  <arry75> asl pls
  <Aethelwulf> Speak english
  <arry75> age sex location please
  <Aethelwulf> Why does it matter?
  <Aethelwulf> 53 male Lituhuania
  <arry75> just wannaknow k
  <arry75> ok
  <arry75> i m looking for a girl
  <arry75> i hope u wont mind
  <Aethelwulf> Try a place called "outside"
  <Aethelwulf> I heard there is quite a few
  <arry75> k
  <arry75> thanks
  <arry75> no body is there
  <arry75> any way thanks


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906823
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.608279
text:
  Mmytacism: you know what's fucking pointless?
  Mmytacism: a broken pencil
  C Spatula: oooh, good point
  C Spatula: or lack thereof


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906824
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.608377
text:
  <Asuna|Sola_and_Sleep> Heh, I just plugged in a printer for
  the first time in a year
  <Asuna|Sola_and_Sleep> and a homework assignment that I needed
  3 months ago immediately printed out
  <me[dot]> hahaha
  <Asuna|Sola_and_Sleep> Yeah
  <Asuna|Sola_and_Sleep> Isn't that great?
  <me[dot]> Modern technology, always expediting our needs


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906824
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.608432
text:
  <Enygma> ?Ú?× s?Ú
  <Enygma> I love japanese text without the support for it. I
  feel like Im reading a bunch of cheat codes.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906825
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.608585
text:
  <PacMan85> fresh fl strawberries
  <jedrek> strawberries aren't in season here yet
  <PacMan85> well that sucks
  <jedrek> not really
  <jedrek> i prefer waiting a bit to living in america's hospice


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906825
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.608627
text:
  (moimau) my net would make your net reverse compile itself,
  tar.gz itself
  (moimau) and upload it back to the server it came from.
  (moimau) so sit down.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906826
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.608728
text:
  <cinco`de`mayo> Are Mexicans really baptized in bean dip?
  <cinco`de`mayo> Yes, but only because Jesus once said, Blessed
  are the refried, for they shall inherit the southwest United
  States.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906826
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.608784
text:
  <anti-hero> how do u do the quote things?
  <@renetiq> anti-hero you have to write a script :P
  <anti-hero> like a play?
  <@Oz> rofl
  <@renetiq> lol
  <anti-hero> how do u do it then?
  <anti-hero> i dont have time to write a play


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906826
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.608840
text:
  <FlatFace> Put it in C:winoot
  <SLing> I already have a /winoot/ directory
  <FlatFace> !
  <FlatFace> SLING USING *NIX!?!?!?!?!
  <SLing> Nah
  <SLing> It's just so much easier to reach the / than the  :P


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906826
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.608892
text:
  !¡ Join: (Kiwi) (nama@AC866DE5.ipt.aol.com)
  (Kiwi): so wet...
  (Kiwi): so juicy....
  (Kiwi): so moist...
  (Kiwi): mmm...Kiwi
  ! @S73pH4n|3|Domestic_Warrior poops on kiwi
  (@S73pH4n|3|Domestic_Warrior): oh pardon me
  (@S73pH4n|3|Domestic_Warrior): was that an aol user?
  (Kiwi): yes, yes it was
  (@S73pH4n|3|Domestic_Warrior): oopsie
  (Kiwi): AOL is the #1 ISP provider
  (Kiwi): respect
  (@S73pH4n|3|Domestic_Warrior): you should be very proud of
  yourself
  (@S73pH4n|3|Domestic_Warrior): "so easy, no wonder it's #1
  among the people who can't tie their own shoe laces"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906827
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.608968
text:
  <@Ixnorp> LEGOS!!!
  <@Ixnorp> you better not even be THINKING talking trash about
  legos =P
  <@Ixnorp> Kj mentioned Duplos which are like Legos for
  retarded children
  <HermyCZ> nope. Legos are cool- you screaming out 'Legos' in
  ecstasy caught me off guard.  ;P
  <@Ixnorp> ohhh~~~  legos~~  oh oh OOOOH LEGOS!!!!! *spurt*
  <Kjorteo> Hmm.  If you think about it, you could make an
  interesting sex toy out of legos.  You'd need to do something
  about the sharp jagged corners of the rectangular design, of
  course, but if you can take care of that, the bump things they
  have on the surface to put more legos on...hee, yeah.  It's
  like the next step up from being ribbed. :-b
  <@Ixnorp> Kj: but "dotted for her pleasure" doesnt exactly
  have the same ring
  <Kjorteo> WHat's more important, the jingle or how the thing
  feels when it's stuffed inside you? ;b


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906827
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.609018
text:
  <Tristan> I have a very bad headache, I need about 20 or so
  asprin.
  <Ari> awww....
  * Ari huggles Tris
  <Kryptonite> I LITERALLY BROKE MY ARM all i got was a HEH


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906827
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.609095
text:
  <egypt> bejeweled is hypnotic.
  <zebra> omg bejeweled is like crack.
  <egypt> i'm convinced this is an attempt at world domination.
  <egypt> i can't stop playing this.
  <egypt> MUST.. GET... JEWELS... INTO LINES OF THREEEEEEE.
  <egypt> NO MOVES LEFT? BASTARDS!
  <Allan> What's bejeweled?
  <egypt> its like, tetris for the mentally challenged.
  <zebra> omg I HATE that noise it makes when you lose.
  <egypt> omg i KNOW
  <egypt> it makes me feel like such a FAILURE
  <zebra> it makes the baby jesus cry.
  <egypt> "you have no friends. please find a disease and crawl
  into bed with it, thanks."
  <zebra> That *GAME* makes me feel like a failure.
  * zebra falls over laughing


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906828
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.609165
text:
  <Kitty> h1 u wnat 2 d8?
  <tavaryn> no nall, you're too l8
  <Kitty> :(
  <Kitty> but it is r f8
  <tavaryn> maybe you should w8
  <tavaryn> because we just can't rel8
  <Kitty> but we r old enuf 2 m8
  <tavaryn> you can't put food on my pl8
  <Kitty> but when im with u i feel gr8
  <Kitty> i thought we were going fishing i already bought the
  b8
  <tavaryn> maybe i should give you another chance with a clean
  sl8


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906828
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.609263
text:
  Mr Brown> ill snip ur ass
  <JD> I'll carry that flag so good, you won't know what hit ya
  <JD> Wait, that didn't sound very threatening...


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906828
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.609307
text:
  andrewy: linux exploits are like IF THE MOON IS IN FRONT OF
  VENUS AND YOU ARE LEFT HANDED AND SOMEONE ALREADY HAS LOCAL
  ACCESS AND YOU HAVE YAEWS (YET ANOTHER EMACS WEB SERVER)
  INSTALLED IT MIGHT BE POSSIBLE UNDER CERTAIN CONDITIONS TO
  BECOME ROOT


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906829
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.609358
text:
  <Freman> I just asked my boss why he's doing all the new
  gigabit runs in cat5 (not even cat5e) instead of cat6e... the
  fool replies and says "cat6e has bugs in it"....


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906830
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.609407
text:
  <DAL9000> i was kicking ass at scrabble
  <DAL9000> and got dropped
  <DAL9000> i really should spend my time much more
  constructively than pummeling lonely housewives and unemployed
  fatguys in scrabble


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906830
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.609449
text:
  (Pete767ca) @find futurama
  (Pete767ca) !help
  (Pete767ca) !helpserve
  (Pete767ca) anybody know were I can get episodes online?
  (iamhurtin) yeah type /quit accept futurama ep 01
  quit: (Pete767ca) (Pete767ca@rn-rercrcXXX.uwaterloo.ca)
  (accept futurama ep 01)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906831
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.609544
text:
  <Mrod> i earned 1 point of gay for reading a guy's blog btw
  <BL> omg you have the high score!
  <BL> please enter your initials


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906831
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.609604
text:
  <Jumper> there's an old saying in this part of ze world:
  you're not a real geek until you've scored sex through IRC
  <Jumper> irl sex, that is
  <smiler> Jumper: We figured =)
  <smiler> Jumper: can you even say you scored if you get
  cybersex?
  <smiler> Jumper: That would be a REAL geek.
  <Jumper> smiler: that would just be a looser


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906832
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.609704
text:
  <Kurt> Who would win in a fight, Batman or Jesus?
  <jre> Batman
  <egg> Batman
  <jre> Does Jesus have a Christ-mobile or a utility belt?  NO.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906832
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.609769
text:
  <Nacho> So, you have several types of tourist: You have the
  "I'm on vacation, so I'm just gonna relax" types, that just
  wear comfy clothes.
  <Nacho> You then have the "I'm in some place special, so I'm
  going to dress nice" types.
  <Nacho> And then you have the "What happens in $location stays
  in $location, so I'm going to dress like an exhibitionist
  slut" types.  I like those... ;-)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906832
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.609829
text:
  <Rokkr> humor's a good thing
  <Rokkr> i always said if you're an ugly guy and you want to
  get laid you have 2 choices..play an instrument or make women
  laugh
  <tack> or rape them
  <Rokkr> that's not laid tack, that's assault =p
  <tack> hey, you do things your way, i do things mine


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906833
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.609943
text:
  <geck`> anyone like vegtable lasagna?
  <_ace> i do
  <geck`> good stuff huh ace
  <_ace> cept for the kind with spinach,
  <geck`> unfortunately mine is frozen pr-made but its still
  excellent
  <geck`> esad it actually is like reg lasagna but it has a
  cheese sause and may veggies
  <kisama> pr made?
  <kisama> hahah
  <geck`> pre made snow
  <geck`> like frozen
  <kisama> i thought you meant
  <kisama> puerto rican made


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906833
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.609990
text:
  mdvb: Matt, you not watching the State of the Union?
  strestout1: ill tell u the state of the union
  strestout1: we're losing jobs, the economy is going to shyt,
  the whole world hates us
  strestout1: god bless america
  strestout1: the end


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906833
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.610043
text:
  * Lemming hands out glasses full of an unidentifiable liquid.
  <Lemming> beba la sandwich!
  <red_cactus> you blended a sammich?
  <red_cactus> *blenderd
  <red_cactus> *blendered
  <red_cactus> *put a sammich in a blender


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906834
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.610115
text:
  Spoon35: http://www.oddworldz.com/fmweekly/kellypinup.jpg
  SenorWeird: who?
  Momog: hehe
  SenorWeird: who is that?
  Momog: kelly hu = the wolverine chick from xmen
  SenorWeird: Kelly who?
  Spoon35: exactly!
  SenorWeird: Kelly Exactly?
  Momog: heh
  Momog: it's a trap!
  SenorWeird: Just tell me the chick's name. It's Kelly what?
  Spoon35: Hu.
  SenorWeird: ?!
  SenorWeird: The chick you just posted a picture of!
  Spoon35: Hu
  SenorWeird: That's what I wanna know! Kelly who!
  Spoon35: exactly!
  SenorWeird: So it's Kelly Exactly!
  * Marty11 Laughs in the strange confusion
  Spoon35: Hu.
  SenorWeird: The girl in the picture you posted is Kelly
  Exactly
  Momog: Hu, Kelly.
  Momog: HA!
  SenorWeird: Yes, Kelly, Momog.
  Spoon35: Kelly Momog??
  SenorWeird: Kelly Exactly
  Momog: doh
  SenorWeird: Okay, you know what? Forget this.
  SenorWeird: Let's talk about that hot chick in Mulholland
  Drive and The Ring.
  SenorWeird: What's her name?
  Momog: who?
  SenorWeird: her name
  Spoon35: Watts.
  SenorWeird: yes, I think my question was quite clear.
  Spoon35: Watts.
  * Momog covers his ears and screams
  SenorWeird: are you not understanding me?
  SenorWeird: Who is the chick from The Ring?
  Spoon35: I think I understand. you want to know Watts.
  SenorWeird: Not What, who. Who is the chick from The Ring.
  Spoon35: no, Watts is the chick from the Ring
  SenorWeird: Who is?
  Spoon35: no, she was in X2
  SenorWeird: What?!
  Spoon35: exactly.
  SenorWeird: Exactly was in X2. okay.
  SenorWeird: so then Who was in the ring?
  Spoon35: Hu was.
  SenorWeird: Who was in the ring?
  Spoon35: no. Watts was in the Ring. Hu was in X2.
  SenorWeird: Exactly. Now, let's get back to the Ring. What's
  that chick's name?
  Spoon35: watts.
  SenorWeird: okay, I'm lost.
  SenorWeird: What's the name of the chick from X2?
  Spoon35: no, Watts is the name of the chick from the Ring
  SenorWeird: Forget about the ring. I don't want to hear about
  Who was in the ring.
  Spoon35: watts
  SenorWeird: Am I not clear? Who was in X2?
  Spoon35: yes.
  SenorWeird: Yes?
  SenorWeird: Yes what?
  Spoon35: Yes Hu! No Watts.
  SenorWeird: ....
  SenorWeird: What?!
  Momog: i am logging this and using it as blackmail against you
  both
  SenorWeird: oh, this is either genius or stupidity.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906834
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.610160
text:
  <rancid> if i made my drive NTFS and it is going slow, does my
  computer just need to get use to it?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906834
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.610231
text:
  <Sumez> Q3 arena test
  <Aximili> What is it?
  <Sumez> don't you know what Quake is?!?
  <Aximili> YES, I know what Quake is
  <Aximili> But 'Q3' could have stood for 'Quicktime 3' as far
  as I know
  <Sumez> Quicktime 3 arena :P
  <SpyFrog> but isn't quicktime up in version 4?
  <Sumez> Spy: not the multiplayer version :)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906834
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.610276
text:
  [Kris] friggen brazilians are still going nuts, even second
  defacement is by some group which hangs on brasnet
  [jimmiejaz] they just got electricity, they've got to catch
  up.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906835
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.610340
text:
  <rick_rizzy> dude how's this for a horror story
  <rick_rizzy> i just ate a hershey's kiss
  <rick_rizzy> but sort of half choked on it
  <rick_rizzy> some of it got caught in my throat
  <rick_rizzy> so i was all snorting and trying to cough it up
  <rick_rizzy> and now it's all up in my upper throat and nasal
  passage
  <rick_rizzy> I'M IN HELL


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906835
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.610385
text:
  <Angel> Not all chemicals are bad. Without chemicals such as
  hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to
  make water, a vital ingredient in beer


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906835
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.610437
text:
  < anakin > bayls: no, i want to know WHAT IT DOES so i know
  WHETHER OR NOT to remove it
  < anakin > there's nothing more useful than to have an address
  bar on the bottom of ur screen at all times :)
  < Bayls > anakin - Ah right. Well, use the Force or something.
  :)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906836
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.610496
text:
  <Angelic> the best ones are the people who call up claiming to
  be network admins
  <Angelic> and you can tell its a total lie
  <Angelic> I had a "network admin" call once stating that he
  had the house wired with cat5 when it was built
  <Angelic> so he should be able to connect all 6 computers to
  the internet without a router ot hub
  <Angelic> wanted to know why the tech insisted it couldnt be
  done
  <Angelic> I asked him what was going to assign the dynamic
  addresses and he said the house


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906836
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.610551
text:
  <+GeoFrey> CINCINNATI - A court official in the U.S. says a
  13-year-old boy charged with raping a 5-year-old girl at a
  McDonald's play area is denying the accusation.
  <+GeoFrey> lol wtf?
  <+farted> I'm lovin' it


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906836
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.610599
text:
  <|Spanky|> peeing your pants it like happiness
  <|Spanky|> everyone can see it, but only you can feel its
  warmth


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906836
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.610670
text:
  (talking about a guy that worked at the world trade center)
  <@PowrSlave> this poor fuck is getting divorced cuz of 9/11
  <@PowrSlave> lol
  <@PowrSlave> his wife filed
  <@PowrSlave> he didnt go into work that morning and went to
  his mistresses' house instead
  <@PowrSlave> had his phone off
  <nonzeRo> haha
  <nonzeRo> lucky guy
  <@PowrSlave> he turned it on at around 11:00 and his wife was
  like "OMFG ARE YOU OKAY WHERE ARE YOUR?"
  <@PowrSlave> hes like "im at the office honey. whats the
  matter?"
  <@PowrSlave> lol


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906837
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.610768
text:
  <The`Artful`Dodger> My fucking physics teacher has a spongebob
  squarepants poster in his class :|
  <The`Artful`Dodger> It says "E = MC Squaredpants"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906838
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.610884
text:
  <RazorX> tired of hearing my 200 pound upstairs neighbor walk
  <chemdog> hey, I'm 200 lbs!
  <RazorX> so is she
  <chemdog> doh!
  <FS_Falcon_GA> Raxoz you haven't tried to hit it yet?
  <RazorX> no ive heard it getting hit.... i think it hits back
  <FS_Falcon_GA> Man we didn't get you drunk enough yet. I'll
  have to work on that
  <RazorX> not enough beer in the world my man


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906838
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.610943
text:
  [uid48:#humblefxp SEX]
  [uid48:#humblefxp SEX]
  <dj|black> [N] uid48 has requested a channel SEX on #humbleFXP
  at 3:11pm.
  <dj|black> :)
  <Zoogle> chanel sex, eh?
  <Zoogle> with 40 males and 15 bots
  <Zoogle> [sarcasm] as tempting as that may sound [/sarcasm]
  I'll pass on that opportunity


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906838
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.610985
text:
  [NissanKin] I have my skyline for sale...
  [NissanKin] $20k
  [NissanKin] R30
  [NissanKin] fastest in Oz
  [Bayls] Actually the 1994 Holden Apollo is the fastest
  production car ever produced in the unierse.
  [NissanKin] i have 323kw at the whels
  [Bayls] Yeah? I have a digital thermometer.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906839
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.611133
text:
  <nJess> God that stings like a motherfuck
  <nJess> I just picked up my airsoft
  *** Kederaji has joined channel #C&T
  <nJess> And it discharged, into my face.
  <nJess> At a range of about a foot and a half.
  <Kederaji> O_o
  <Kederaji> I always walk in at bad times.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906839
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.611174
text:
  (@Normandy) anyway, yes this girl has a nice arse, so maybe on
  the next staff night out I might slip her one
  (@Kazimierz) who says romance is dead


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906840
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.611219
text:
  <Deviant> Never argue with an idiot. They drag you down to
  their level, then beat you with experience.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906840
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.611282
text:
  <Curufin> You know, I think there's a point in your life when
  you realize that life's just not worth it anymore. When you're
  giving more than you're taking, and there's just no joy left
  in life.
  <Eldamehomework> Curufin; that's what ice cream is for :-D
  <Curufin> I'm lactose intolerant.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906840
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.611339
text:
  <Alcaron> You should set yourself up a webcam. I don't know
  why, but I get this feeling we'll catch you doing something
  stupid. :)
  <Longi> Alcaron: thats exactly the reason i wont set one up,
  the high probablity of me doing someone extremely embarassing
  <Longi> err?
  <Longi> THING
  <Longi> someTHING!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906840
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.611387
text:
  <@Longcat> Could a blue screen of death constitute being
  defenestrated?
  <Edible> Thrown out of Windo-
  <Edible> ...
  * Edible goes to cry.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906841
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.611435
text:
  * Synoptica bangs OutLore and Lord-Data
  [Synoptica] fuck
  [Synoptica] no i dont
  * Synoptica bangs OutLore and Lord-Data's heads together


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906841
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.611481
text:
  <Angelz> ha
  <Angelz> I did not get flooded off!
  * Angelz (Angel@213.137.25.G9182=) Quit (Excess flood)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906841
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.611534
text:
  <dietz> Computers, the internet, it's just a large scale
  version of Knott's Berry Farm.
  <dietz> Oh, and instead of Snoopy, there's porn. Yeah.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906841
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.611597
text:
  <glome> Who stole the cookie from the cookie jar?!
  <content> glome stole the cookie from the cookie jar!
  <glome> Who me?!
  <content> Yes you!
  <glome> Couldn't be!
  <content> Then WHO?!!
  <glome> Woody stole the cookie from the cookie jar!
  *** glome has been kicked by DrWoody (fuck you i didn't touch
  the motherfucking cookie, bitch)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906842
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.611657
text:
  <neo-fs> does anyone have aim
  <neo-fs> for the life of me i cant change my fucking password
  <neo-fs> and its about to fucking piss me the fuck off
  <gilma> my aim is good
  <kryonik> my aim is good
  <kryonik> when im whackin it
  <kryonik> into some chicks mouth
  <neo-fs> @_@
  <neo-fs> your aim is weird


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906842
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.611717
text:
  <McMoo> it smells like sex upstairs
  <`michael> haha
  <Kenn> I just smelled like sex. I didn't want to shower.
  <Kenn> But I did...
  <Kenn> :
  <kisama> sex and masturbation smell like the same thing, kenn.
  <Kenn> kisama, that wasn't nice.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906843
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.611822
text:
  <Inoshiro> Wth
  <Inoshiro> "Don't iron, don't put in a triangle, don't put in
  an oval"
  <harb> Er?
  <Inoshiro> Is there a translation table for the washing tag on
  clothing?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906843
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.611868
text:
  (CitizenC): I spilled my ashtray all over my computer earlier
  today.
  (CitizenC): Son of a bitch.
  (CitizenC): Took forever to clean up.
  (CitizenC): At least I don't have to empty my ashtray now.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906843
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.611967
text:
  <lildaemon> every girl i meet and talk to ..so far ..(about
  mental
  disabilities).. like personality ones
  <lildaemon> they all seem to have one
  <lildaemon> my brief analysis concludes that all girls have
  issues because of me
  <lildaemon> men*


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906844
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.612016
text:
  <LeanaAnne> Oooh, I guess lacrosse builds up the ol' ass
  muscles ^___^
  <Seiya> Ha, so does being gay. :x


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906844
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.612065
text:
  <jabowah> When I jerk off I feel good for about twenty seconds
  and then WHAM it's right back into suicidal depression.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906844
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.612119
text:
  <downer> who is you?
  <Sarpedon> yo mama
  <Sarpedon> oh wait... i'm sorry
  <Sarpedon> i often confuse myself WITH PEOPLE I FUCK


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906845
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.612209
text:
  Hawkins030: Why are people in 90 degree weather so white?
  Hawkins030: Because the tan of 90 degrees doesn't exist.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906845
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.612254
text:
  ThatIsDamnGood: Stupidity is an inexhaustible natural resource
  ThatIsDamnGood: Someday we'll learn to generate electrical
  power from it
  ThatIsDamnGood: And it will change the world


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906845
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.612307
text:
  <gmaxwell> 1960: "I have a great idea! lets have every person
  in the country carry a radio tracking beacon!" "That'll never
  fly!"  2012: "I can has TWO iphones??"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906846
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.612362
text:
  <Averox> and I'm about to shove my fist through someone's
  head. Begins with an "L" and ends with a "ordship"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906846
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.612412
text:
  <YumCimil> I'd really hate someone to have a website
  containing all the stupid things I'd said.
  <Beagl> bash.org ?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906846
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.612464
text:
  <@Terror> "It's easy to forget what a sin is in the middle of
  a battlefield."
  <@cky> opposite over hypotenuse
  <@cky> dipshit


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906847
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.612603
text:
  onuap: good morning
  bochip: morning onuap
  Blitzsama: good? why does everyone assume the other guy is
  having a good morning?
  onuap: bad morning for you then
  bochip: he was wishing you a good one
  bochip: for some reason
  Blitzsama: i know
  Blitzsama: i was wishing he would stop, as it 10 pm here
  bochip: but, you would like to have a good morning tomorrow,
  yes?
  Blitzsama: maybe...
  Blitzsama: let me sleep on it.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906847
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.612649
text:
  <@Vexer`> I just got a new pen, it says "IPMORTANT: WHEN
  TRAVELING ON A PLANE, UNCAP THE PEN WITH THE TIP FACING UPWARD
  TO REDUCE ANY RISK OF INK LEAKAGE


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906848
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.612703
text:
  <cbf> oh that reminds me, I might've given your number out in
  a irc channel last night
  <Mr_E> are you fucking serious?
  <Mr_E> if you're the reason some cunt called me at 4 in the
  fucking morning I'ma throw bricks through your window


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906848
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.612818
text:
  <[Binary]> How do I block pornsites and stuff in Windows? My
  aunt just got a huge bill after her kids had been surfing.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906849
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.612913
text:
  <Codi> Windows is unprotected sex. Linux is using a condom,
  the pill, a vasectomy, and the Berlin wall.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906849
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.612996
text:
  <ignatios> synchronised swimming mang
  <Schatten> ok
  <ignatios> _o>
  <Schatten> _o>
  <ignatios> <o_
  <paranoid> <o_
  <Schatten> <o_
  <ignatios> o/
  <paranoid> o/
  <Schatten> o/
  <ignatios> <o>
  <paranoid> <o>
  <paranoid> ~~~~~~~~~~~<o/~~~~~~~~ HOLY SHIT I CAN'T SWIM
  <ignatios> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~/~~~~~~~~~
  <ignatios> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906850
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.613094
text:
  <ChuffyCow> I'm having a bagel with nutella
  <chrish> gnutella?!  it'll take you all day to download that
  bagel!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906850
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.613141
text:
  <beefstain> i wish faggots would stop putting my deoderant on
  me with their tongues while i slumber
  <beefstain> i mean
  <beefstain> YARR, MANLY THINGS


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906850
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.613194
text:
  <delta> *.na is only 2.500 $USD
  <goat> WTF
  <goat> they charge 2500 for a fuckin namibia tld?
  <goat> no wonder they're all starving


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906851
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.613246
text:
  <@Phil21> juniper calls back saying they have m7i for "only"
  $15k
  <@Phil21> fuckers
  <*comstud> *looks in his wallet*
  <*comstud> damn, $10 short.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906851
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.613298
text:
  <Tippytoes> i have kids in the room
  <Tippytoes> is it safe to look at?
  <bark> i don't think they mention any words like CUNT on that
  page, no
  <tm> just hide it behind your anal porn


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906851
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.613354
text:
  <two-c00l> i met eminem yesterday
  <rick^MD> eminem is gay, and i hate gays
  <two-c00l> eminem is not gay!
  <rick^MD> yes he is
  <two-c00l> prove it
  <rick^MD> ok... i had anal sex with him last week
  <two-c00l> um i thought you said you hate gays?
  <rick^MD> oh umm... i was just making sure he was gay so i
  could prove it to you


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906851
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.613404
text:
  <Guillotine>: The problem with being Democrat is that if you
  vote for Obama, you're sexist. And if you vote for Hilary,
  you're racist. Its easy being a Republican. No matter what
  you're retarded.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906852
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.613467
text:
  <air0day> im not fucking burning crosses in the lawns of
  gender benders
  <air0day> im talking about who i want to and don't want to
  have sex with
  <air0day> i think i should be allowed to have pretty specific
  opinions on where i'd like to put my penis
  <devnulled> like in a bowl of m&m's for instance
  <air0day> right
  <air0day> a bowl of m&ms is just fine


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906852
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.613521
text:
  * nick > Stalkaout is now known as Stalkachu
  <@Miz> and where have you been?
  <@Cheez> considering hes at university hes probably been out
  drinking / getting stoned / getting laid
  <@Miz> considering its Stalkeh i'd wager not
  <@Cheez> LOL


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906852
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.613576
text:
  <Chis> anyone experienced with shavers?
  <Chis> i need to get one on ebay)
  <Chis> http://search.ebay.com/search/search.dll?
  MfcISAPICommand=GetResult&ht=1&SortProperty=MetaEndSort&query=
  electric+shaver
  <Spidey> dude
  <Spidey> just go to the damn store


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906853
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.613681
text:
  <danhon> So, I'm eating a banana
  <danhon> And I can't stop thinking "You haven't had sex in
  10,000 years"
  <Cringer> A quick google search will show that that's not
  true.
  <Cringer> Bananas just haven't had sex with any other bananas
  in 10,000 years.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906853
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.613783
text:
  <faustwork> she looks good
  <chaommm> is she hot?
  <faustwork> id bang her
  <chaommm> that doesnt mean shit
  <faustwork> id bang her with no beer
  <chaommm> WOAH


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906854
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.613838
text:
  <saxxonpike> What a dumbass.
  <saxxonpike> some guy asked me for help, and I told him to
  call for tech support.
  <mrmojo> how stupid
  <saxxonpike> that's not the best part... he was on dial-up.
  <saxxonpike> then he complains to me that there's line noise.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906856
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.613941
text:
  <haole-writing> did you ever read my story, vampress?
  <Vampress> I'm sorry I didn't get a chance yet
  <Vampress> it's sitting on my nightstand
  <Vampress> staring at me everyday
  <Ragnarok> haole must have put a lot of himself in that story


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906856
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.614007
text:
  <Cat`Bored> Would you say it's foolish to make licking one's
  elbow a life goal?
  <Tumbleweed> you've been trying to do for the last ten
  minutes, haven't you?
  <Despot> ...
  <Despot> don't answer that.
  <Despot> please.
  <Cat`Bored> I'm making progress.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906856
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.614095
text:
  impOrted megAmi: life does suck, ya know. i mean, at the bad
  parts, naturally.
  JimBob4554: words of wisdom
  JimBob4554: "life sucks when its bad"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906857
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.614138
text:
  lprocks: can you link me to a place that i can download roms?
  Kow: www.google.com
  lprocks: der i tried and it kept taking me to different sites


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906857
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.614188
text:
  <@nik0li> SANTA MONICA, Calif. (Wireless Flash) -- A woman in
  Santa Monica, California, is attempting to lose weight in a
  manner others may not be able to stomach -- an all-semen diet.
  <@nik0li> Starting December 1, a plump porn star named Kim
  Kelly hopes to lose between 10 and 20 pounds by spending 30
  days on a diet consisting largely of semen -- or as she
  prefers, "man juice."
  <@prence_> shit, ill eat my own man-juice if it will help me
  lose 30 pounds!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906857
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.614232
text:
  <LAWN|batman[sAs]> the department of homeland security is
  making a mockery of the starfleet alert system.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906857
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.614324
text:
  <ChAoS_zZz> FTP UP @ XX.XX.XX.XX port XXXX xxxx/xxxx 60k Cap
  If u dont get in its full. Hammer me and Ill fuckin Whack ya.
  Dont try and leech the whole site. Ill rape your mom, then
  your sister. WIth your mom's torn off arm. Think thats harsh?
  U should see some of the assholes logging on.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906858
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.614369
text:
  <SSmith> Wow, I was just watching this porno, and the people
  in it had the same monitor as I used to


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906858
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.614440
text:
  <AlmtyBob> god my ball-sweat smells good
  <AlmtyBob> too bad I have a cold 8(
  <AlmtyBob> can hardly smell it
  <skmt> yeah.
  <skmt> ball sweat has a weird smell.
  <SD-Washu> mine fucking stinks
  <AlmtyBob> it's like coffee though
  <AlmtyBob> doesn't taste as good as it smells
  <mdl> AlmtyBob: dude
  <mdl> you taste your nutsaq sweat?
  <skmt> you only need to sniff your hand after you beat it,
  fool.
  <AlmtyBob> lets just say it's a good thing my cum smells bad


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906858
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.614518
text:
  <verb`> baby blue pumas are guy shoes?
  <Twilo`> yes
  <molesto> i might not know how to dress, but i know how not to
  invite a serial assfucking by the entire crew of an aircraft
  carrier
  <Twilo`> baby blue isnt a girls color
  <molesto> <Twilo`> baby blue isnt a girls color
  <verb`> any color preceded by baby is a girl color
  <molesto> i'll pretend you didn't say that
  <Twilo`> dude u serious?
  <molesto> any colour preceded by baby gets you on the
  paedophile register
  <Twilo`> u stuck in the 90's?
  <molesto> no i'm stuck back in the days when people that wore
  shoes like that didn't have anuses like exit wounds


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906859
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.614566
text:
  <Trivia>  011.1753. What is measured on the Cephalic Index?
  <Trivia>  1st Hint: ***** ****   Question Value : 12 Points
  <Olmec> penis size


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906859
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.614690
text:
  <Zenji> My brother who hasnt talked to my Dad in like a year
  or so got a chick pregnant.
  <Zenji> He notified my Dad by sending him a "Worlds Number 1
  Grandfather" card.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906859
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.614765
text:
  specul8tor: I have no girlfriend....she dumped me
  specul8tor: dummy
  sprightlygirl: thats sucks, im sorry to hear it...
  specul8tor: she will regret it one day....when she realizes
  that no one could possibly put down the love like me
  sprightlygirl: lol
  sprightlygirl: at least your ego's not bruised


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906860
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.614846
text:
  <SixFeet-> rejected by a computer script, new low in my life
  <NTT> well, at least u didnt have cybersex with one of those
  bots that pm's you here on mirc
  <SixFeet-> well i tried, but it replied with "lets just be
  friends..."
  <SixFeet-> =(


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906860
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.614911
text:
  <BlackDeth> i like stalked this girl sorta :D
  <BlackDeth> like once she asked me for a ride home from work
  <BlackDeth> and i took her home... i dropped her off at her
  house
  <BlackDeth> and shes like... wait a minute..how did you know
  where i lived?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906860
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.614959
text:
  <Edge_> and i am like tearing my thumb apart
  <[cut]> can you still masturbate edge?
  <Edge_> i think i will be ok


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906861
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.615052
text:
  <makeworld> ICQ scared the shit outta me
  <makeworld> walked into my pitch dark room and hear a knocking
  noise, sounded
  like someone knocking on my window
  <makeworld> shit


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906861
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.615098
text:
  <HellmasteR> another rather amusing thing is that lol in h4x0r
  is 101, and 101 in binary is 5
  <HellmasteR> so when i say FIVE from now on i mean lol


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906862
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.615216
text:
  <@Headlor> when i live somewhre less gay
  <@Headlor> im getting a cat
  <@Headlor> and calling it "Hitler Stalin Mao"
  <@Headlor> or just stalin
  <@Headlor> "whats your cat called?"
  <@Headlor> "stalin."
  <@Headlor> "."
  <@Headlor> ill write on its littertray "human rights"
  <@Headlor> and on its bowl "flesh of the capitalist pig dogs"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906862
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.615276
text:
  <Daki> thanks i know
  <Azalyn> aww
  <Azalyn> *smack*
  <Azalyn> your so cute when you get smacked
  <Azalyn> *smack*smack*
  <Azalyn> awwwww!!!!
  <Azalyn> *smack*smack*smack!*smack!!-crack* err, oh shit.. o.o
  i think i killed him >.<
  *** Daki (gg@sc-66-74-86-145.socal.rr.com) Quit (Read error:
  Connection reset by peer)
  <Azalyn> O_O


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906862
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.615334
text:
  <Cthon98> so I waited until my friend bought a box of timbits
  and got back in the car
  <Cthon98> (timbits being "donut holes" or whatever you yanks
  call them)
  <Cthon98> and just as he was about to bit into one, I say
  <Cthon98> "you ever notice how those look just like creamy
  shaved nuts?"
  <Cthon98> so I now have a free box of timbits.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906863
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.615391
text:
  <SJ> I'm playing "Raising Baby".... I got to the 3rd level ...
  <SJ> Teething
  <mtngrrl> lol, whered you find that game?
  <SJ> it was on backorder - took 9 months to come in


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906863
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.615441
text:
  <[Piratez]> www. g( . )( . )gle.com
  <[Piratez]> now if google would celebrate the same holidays as
  I do


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906863
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.615494
text:
  <guest1101> YEAH I MEAN.. HEY... HOW MANY PPL HAVE A TAN AND
  USE IRC.. I MEAN CHRIST..
  <Selfloathing> I used to have a tan, but then I lost it.
  <Boogaleeboo> I always get a tan before winter
  <anna_jpg> Tan is not the color cheetos leaves on your
  fingers.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906863
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.615546
text:
  <Sober|wrk> heh
  <Sober|wrk> lol
  <Sober|wrk> my co-worker is throwing a ball
  <Sober|wrk> up in the air to relieve some stress
  <Sober|wrk> she just smashed it into a ceiling panel and
  knocked it down on her head


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906864
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.615587
text:
  (@Bird2002): wana know how to get free ms keyboards and mice?
  (@suicide6x): how?
  (@Bird2002): do you have a keyboard or mouse now?
  (@suicide6x): um
  (@suicide6x): yeah


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906864
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.615701
text:
  <Ownage|Josh[Owner]> Here's your 1st hint: audre_ _______
  <jaGuar> !next
  <san`> audrey hepbourn
  <Ownage|Josh[Owner]> Winner: san` Answer: audrey hepburn Time:
  12.219 Streak: 1 Points: 12 WPM: 13 Rank: 7th
  <aenima> !
  <jaGuar> wtf
  <Ownage|Josh[Owner]> 48.  Category:
  Trivia : What is the square root of -1?
  <aenima> googled >.<
  <san`> close enough i suppose
  <Ownage|Josh[Owner]> Winner: san` Answer: i Time: 1.532
  Streak: 2 Points: 13 WPM: 7 Rank: 7th
  <san`> WHAT


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906865
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.615748
text:
  * dregan kicks Yamucha in the nuts
  * dregan stamps on Yamucha's neck
  *** ChanServ sets mode: +o Yamucha
  <dregan> Oh shit.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906865
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.615843
text:
  <ibrahim> is there alive experts?
  <ozzmosis> I've been alive since I was born, you could say I'm
  an expert at it


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906865
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.615892
text:
  <DeX`> i could eat a 4lb london broil and have room left for a
  small chinese woman
  <Damaceles> after you ate her you'd have to eat again in an
  hour


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906866
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.615945
text:
  <Motaro > Live Journal would've been so much better if it were
  called Jive Journal.
  <cylinder > shoudl've been called STICK YOUR FUCKING LIFE IN
  HERE AND THEN WHINE WHEN PEOPLE MAKE CRUDE COMMENTS Journal


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906866
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.616045
text:
  <kisama> amanda is the opposite of a normal computer user
  <Amanda`> KISAMA IS THE OPPOSITE OF HETEROSEXUAL


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906867
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.616097
text:
  <dirtYbird> I am looking for a ecommerce package or someone to
  make one up, mulitlingual etc. Found one in Jamaica but I find
  it hard to take anything from there too serious, I can picture
  them sitting back in front of their PC's with joints the size
  of rolled newspapers on the phone telling me "it'll be coool
  mon"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906867
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.616141
text:
  (cyber1|t0) anyone know how i can open up pm's without a mouse
  pm me now
  (cyber1|t0) actually dont pm


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906867
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.616195
text:
  <DJTodd> Which is gayer? Pokemon or Pro Wrestling?
  <LarsC> wrestling.
  <Amoeba> Wrestling.
  <jt`> wrestling.
  <[prone]> wrestling.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906867
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.616245
text:
  <#C++:Luggage_> guy in the #vb channel thinks vb is too hard..
  so wants to learn assembly..  i advised him against it, but he
  thinks it looks easy "nice small words"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906868
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.616290
text:
  [atrkid] could somebody help me setup a forum ? a friend of
  ours died yesterday, we'd like to make a little site for his
  friends
  [+CoLt-[45]] atrkid .. no
  [+CoLt-[45]] atrkid .. RTFM


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906868
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.616339
text:
  <Nago> i wonder what the chemical formula for warez is
  <n[a]naki> Nago: W Ar Es
  <n[a]naki> Tungsten, Argon, Einsteinium


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906868
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.616440
text:
  [GOD]Smithereens> Condoms are VERY good if you don't have any
  water balloons near you
  [GOD]Smithereens> Don't EVER try the other way around though.
  Xyranius> It's not fun>_<


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906869
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.616536
text:
  <scott> you know I wish there was a -violent flag, so you
  could have some spectacular way of erasing a package you
  really hate
  <Munger> scott: fdisk
  <scott> because Id install nano every day just so I could do a
  : emergeu nmerge -violent nano
  <scott> you know, something with explosions


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906870
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.616628
text:
  <soul|FL> the whole time i am having a boner over the voice of
  some over weight 30+ yr old fat chic


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906870
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.616687
text:
  <port-> well peace out fuckers
  <port-> im done with soa
  <port-> email me if u want to talk, odoyle has the address.
  * port- sets mode: -o port-
  * port- (port-@c-66-229-187-206.we.client2.attbi.com) has left
  #soangels
  <ap0c> heh
  <ap0c> he'll be back
  * port- (port-@c-66-229-187-206.we.client2.attbi.com) has
  joined #soangels
  <port-> god damn autojoin
  * port- (port-@c-66-229-187-206.we.client2.attbi.com) has left
  #soangels


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906870
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.616772
text:
  <Arrgh> futhermore, the DMV shall be refered to from this
  point on as "the dank troll pit"
  <Arkangel> agreed
  <Arkangel> There are many interesting specimens of the lower
  caste of the human race residing there.
  <Arrgh> the last time i was there, i overheard this: "no,
  thats not a saxaphone, its a fire extinguisher"
  <Arkangel> lol
  <Arkangel> I was there three weeks ago and I saw a women who
  looked straight out of "Killer Klowns from Outer Space"
  <Arrgh> !
  <Arrgh> you should have asked for her autograph
  <Arkangel> pink hair
  <Arkangel> reverse mohawk
  <Arkangel> pig tails
  <Arkangel> horrid make-up
  <Arkangel> at least she looked happy!
  <Arrgh> "i loved you in killer klowns! can you sign this for
  me?!"
  <Arkangel> *women proceeds to eat me*


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906870
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.616826
text:
  <DopefishJustin> I just downloaded "Microsoft Visual C++ 6.0
  Standard Edition.exe" off WinMX and it's actually a country
  music MP3 :/
  <DopefishJustin> -=[JustinBot]=- Now playing: [EXE] [Microsoft
  Visual C++ 6] [3:31]
  <DopefishJustin> I should have realized when I noticed it was
  5MB


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906871
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.616926
text:
  <SAV2880> Ok, my point ... who the hell cares about the ZD
  bank account (as long as it's not -$5 million or something!)
  <SwampGas> SAV2880: the 10 people who support emuchrist
  <SwampGas> and it's my duty as owner of ztnet, owner of
  retrogames, owner of cps2 decryption tables to alert them


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906871
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.616979
text:
  * cj_ installs svgalib.
  <cj_> gonna test quake2 on linux
  <nwinter> nice.
  <cj_> then i can play with myself
  <nwinter> GRODEY.
  <cj_> no seriously. my monitors face inwards at me, and both
  the mice are
  within an arms reach. i can chase myself around.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906872
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.617025
text:
  <BusyChild> im witnessing the building of a porn site as we
  speak
  <BusyChild> i cant wait to tell my grandkids what i did when i
  was 21 the night before thansgiving


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906872
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.617080
text:
  <neurotik> huhuhu i think steamed chicken is disgusting but i
  wouldn't consider myself steamedchicken-o-phobic
  <neurotik> therefore i wouldn't consider myself homophobic
  either


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906873
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.617184
text:
  CDSBIGSBY: at work, on the like, 'keyboard' for the cash
  registers, there are two buttons that don't do anything
  CDSBIGSBY: and it's like, the button, a little slip of paper
  that says what the button does, and a plastic cover that holds
  the paper in
  CDSBIGSBY: and this dude at work figured that out, 'cause he
  popped the plastic cover off
  CDSBIGSBY: and so we made labels for the two 'empty' buttons
  on the registers we were on that day
  CDSBIGSBY: he didn't utilize the full potential of the
  opportunity though, as one of his buttons is a happy face and
  the other a sad face
  CDSBIGSBY: but i feel i did mine justice.
  CDSBIGSBY: Lane 14 at Meijer's has a Self-Destruct button and
  a Bat Signal button.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906873
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.617233
text:
  <@RuneCaster> hitting a 9 year old on a crosswalk is probably
  bad for your driving record though
  <@RuneCaster> all I remember was I was on my way to the arcade
  to play TMNT
  <@RuneCaster> and suddenly it was sky ground sky ground sky
  ground sky ground sky ground pain


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906873
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.617339
text:
  (+sok|puppet): i loves my cereal
  (+Harri): i'm hungry
  (@Zaphod): Yeah, cherios should be just about the right size
  for you to 'love' as much as you want
  (+Harri): now i'm not


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906874
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.617406
text:
  <n> hi...okay, i know exactly what i want!...you should be
  older than myself...larger in stature than me...preferably
  Well~Hung..intelligent..cool..funloving..easy going..gentle
  with a firm touch..you should just relish the the role of Top
  Daddy who takes what he wants!...me: i am Totally shaved and
  smooth all over(everywhere!)..soft smooth tanned complexion..i
  LOVE wearing sexy little panties and being
  playfully~submissive to your advances in an almost femme
  manner
  <n> lol
  <booger> i wonder how she shaves around her own asshole
  <booger> thats gotta hurt
  <pat> nair?
  <booger> what if she gets nair up her ass?
  <pat> e-mail her and find out
  <n> uhm
  <n> thats a he
  <booger> OMG


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906874
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.617463
text:
  <BlackNovember> Yesterday when I woke up I found my missing
  Borknagar CD under my pillow.
  <WinterDemon> Yeah, that's the "Cum residue on your hand
  fairy"s way of repaying you for the left over man juice on
  your hand after you finished beating off and passed out with
  your hand under the pillow.
  <BlackNovember> Whoa, so if i jerk off tonight and put my hand
  under my pillow, I'll wake up with a Rotting Christ album
  under it?
  <WinterDemon> Yes, but not the album with a bonus disc, that
  would be too greedy


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906874
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.617512
text:
  * Matataki hhahwhawhawhawhawhawhawhwh
  <Matataki> whenever i wanna laugh i read 'the emulation dream'


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906875
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.617559
text:
  <Ghrens> Halo had a story?  I thought it was about 13 year old
  boys with prepubescent voices calling me a homosexual.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906875
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.617606
text:
  <shigelojoe>I played poker with tarot cards once
  <shigelojoe>I got a full house and three people died.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906875
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.617675
text:
  <Daedalus> But you cannot, however, suck human excrement out
  of spaghetti, no matter how hard you try.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906875
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.617730
text:
  <watashi-x> Oh my God! Are you attemping to DoS me?
  <Polymer> WTF are you talking about dumb ass
  <Polymer> I can't get into your MS-DOS


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906876
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.617779
text:
  <XenThra> I locked my keys in my car in front of planned
  parenthood. I'm terrified of going inside to ask to borrow a
  clothes hangar.
  <DevXen> Just tell them you need to fix a mistake real quick.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906876
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.617843
text:
  <Spazz> I want to find a girl who is not afraid of dating a
  geek guy.
  <Spazz> You know... one that says "Oh, I don't care if I can't
  bring him out in public...   he's got big junk!"
  <StalkerofurSoul> "I dont care if hes ugly and has pimples,
  did you see that quake win loss ratio?"
  <StalkerofurSoul> he's got the finest c++ ive ever set my eyes
  on
  <StalkerofurSoul> omfg, and we was sitting there... and he
  pulled it out, and i asked if i could see it.... and he let me
  hold it....a wireless mouse! what will they think of next!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906876
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.617893
text:
  <Fury> dude! The power just went out in the house and all over
  the city.
  <Fury> everything is off =X
  <Fury> fuck its so dark. this fucking sucks.
  <Angelic[X]> Why are you still here?
  quit: (Fury) (siren@2c4e124f.19108886.cable.ntl.com)
  (Read error: Connection reset by peer)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906876
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.617939
text:
  * fuzzy-lumpkinz was kicked by Soul|Reaver (Soul|Reaver)
  <eX|remix-> soul why u ban fuzzy?
  <eX|remix-> he has a hot sister


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906877
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.617991
text:
  <n3wt> FFS, I am not reading anything with 'The Naughty Goat'
  in the title
  <n3wt> Not unless it has pictures, anyway


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906877
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.618043
text:
  <slot|processor> I thought today was the day I would meet a
  hot chick reading an oracle book in books-a-million.... but i
  was once again wrong.
  <sdodson> It turned out to be a dude?
  <slot|processor> Worse.
  <sdodson> He was reading a MySQL book?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906877
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.618092
text:
  <mandrill> if minnie driver had a mini cooper and multiple
  midget chauffeurs...
  <mandrill> many mini drivers drive minnie driver's mini


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906878
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.618143
text:
  liz: you know if love was measured in kb's ...it would take
  HOURS for me to upload my love for you.
  mikey: *taps your forehead* that's because of your small
  upstream bandwidth dear.
  mikey: <3
  liz: hahahhahahhahahhaha
  liz: god i love it when you talk dorky to me
  mikey: also, i seem to be dropping syn packets.
  mikey: i suspect a collision somewhere on your train of
  thought.
  liz: ping www.loveformikey.com
  mikey: host not found :-(


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906878
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.618210
text:
  <Mister> I was at The Bronx,was quite... strange
  <Mister> and then I saw 2 girls who I know
  <Mister> and they were like :O... Jason? I never knew you were
  gay?!
  <Mister> I told them I was there for the music,don't think
  they believed me
  <Jesus> That's like the worst excuse
  <Mister> I don't care,all these guys buying me drinks
  <Mister> openly checking out my arse
  <Mister> it was like being a girl,was nice getting free stuff
  <Jesus> I'd rather not be a mans eye candy.You were like a
  visual gay prostitute


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906878
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.618305
text:
  <McMoo> My computer's maximum uptime: 4w 2d 15h 39m 3s, set on
  Tue, Feb 19 2002 at 5:53:00p
  <McMoo> LOOK AT HOW BIG MY DICK IS
  <McMoo> 4 WEEKS BIG!!!!!!!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906879
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.618354
text:
  <helminthes> and the little basket at the counter says tips,
  so you hock a big loogie in it and then you realize what you
  did and say, "oh shit i'm dyslexic"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906879
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.618412
text:
  <skippy> Plastic Jesus he's my fellow,comes in red and
  sometimes yellow....ridin' on the dashboard of my car.
  <skippy> I don't care if it rains or freezes,I still got my
  plastic Jesus.....
  <skippy> He don't slip and he don't slide...mainly cuase he's
  magnetized.....


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906881
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.618456
text:
  (fub) I walked into a police station once to pick up some
  court papers, and I smoked a joint about 5 blocks away and I
  was was sitting in there for awhile and I looked down at my
  shoes and the roach was on the front tounge of my shoe ;/


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906881
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.618593
text:
  <PhD> i got woken up by a freakin woodpecker today
  <PhD> i thought someone was knocking :-(
  <Katlizy> doesnt every guy get one of those in the morning?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906882
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.618734
text:
  <Moik> Jesus would drive a Jesus Bus from GTA.
  <KatR> As God, I can say that Jesus would drive a BattleMech.
  <Moik> Jesus would drive K@R's mom like a Shriner's Mini-Car.
  <KatR> Moik, I have no mother. +Creator of all [including me]
  <Moik> Sorry, that was a typo. It should say: "Jesus would
  drive K@R like a japanese schoolgirl on rollerskate heading to
  bukakke class."
  <Moik> The keys are like, right next to each other.
  <KatR> Of course they are. You're still wrong. K@R > Jesus.
  <Moik> Doesn't mean you wouldn't like it.
  <KatR> Moik: Methinks you're projecting again.
  <Moik> In essence, yes, that's what a man must do when
  participating in bukakke.
  <Dark Shadow> that's one of the best 'come'backs I've ever
  seen.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906882
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.618801
text:
  <@playstation201> check the device manager silly
  <[TSE]SPaZED> where's that at?
  <@playstation201> right click on My Computer, click
  properties, then click hardware, then click device manager
  .....
  <[TSE]SPaZED> im still looking for my computer
  <@playstation201> ok, then press and hold the windows key, and
  press the pause break key
  <@PSX_Cheatster> Oooo... ain't that fancy
  <@playstation201> impress at my hotkey skillz PSX_Cheatster?
  :-p
  <@PSX_Cheatster> Not really playstation201, I don't need to
  memorize silly hotkeys like that cause I'm smart enough to
  find My Computer...


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906883
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.618897
text:
  <Scruffypoo> BaLLeriNNa: dunno about best friends.  me and the
  kernel aren't even on speaking terms at the moment.  i have to
  tell bash a message for the kernel, and it tells the kernel.
  then, hopefully, the kernel doesn't get massively depressed
  and run away or anything.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906884
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.619087
text:
  <M3rlin-> what is the legal age to buy alcoholic in england ?
  <p5Ds13a06> you cant buy alcoholics
  <p5Ds13a06> but if you wink the right way, some of them will
  follow you home for free


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906884
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.619134
text:
  CascadeOrca: HAPPY FATHERS DAY!
  Lerxs: indeed
  CascadeOrca: I don't have a real father
  CascadeOrca: so you're all my dad today
  CascadeOrca: Congratulations.
  Sixteen Bit Hero has left the room.
  CascadeOrca: damnit, just like my real father
  clash103 has left the room.
  CascadeOrca: DADDIES! NOOOES!
  Wiggidiba has left the room.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906885
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.619277
text:
  <neia_doll> Im 5 foot 11 and 116 lbs..i lost 3 on accident..
  <k-rad-bob> accident?
  <neia_doll> so Im pretty skinny
  <k-rad-bob> you got an abortion?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906885
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.619339
text:
  <PeppyTheHamster> me and my friends went to a local gas
  station on lunch at school to buy some snacks and shit.
  <PeppyTheHamster> we got inside, and the guy behind the
  counter was like
  <PeppyTheHamster> "Why arent you in school?"
  <PeppyTheHamster> We told him we were on lunch and he was like
  "Good. stay in school, its good for you."
  <PeppyTheHamster> I turned to him and said "Yeah! So we can
  work in a gas station!"
  <PeppyTheHamster> He looked at me like I was the anti-christ.
  As we were leaving he went on the intercom and spoke into his
  microphone "Please ignore the homosexuals leaving the store."


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906885
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.619392
text:
  <rb> eminem vs a terrorist organization
  <rb> weird
  <JtHM> heh
  <JtHM> Eminem_Vs_Al_Qaeda-BattleRap_12"-2002-RNS
  <rb> hahahaha


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906886
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.619485
text:
  <Kashan> Ive been playing jetgrindradio too much
  <Kashan> I just tried to grind a stairwell in halflife


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906886
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.619534
text:
  <Alanna> Saying that Java is nice because it works on all OS's
  is like saying that anal sex is nice because it works on all
  genders


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906887
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.619627
text:
  [Join] n0t_4cc3pt4bl3
  (hurry-now@ip121.cleveland4.oh.pub-ip.psi.net)
  <WD_40> your nick is not acceptable.
  <n0t_4cc3pt4bl3> indeed


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906887
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.619685
text:
  <Paine> "What body parts would you be willing to give away to
  play AO normally?"
  <Paine> I mean, are you really using that little toe for
  anything important?
  <Rattran> Depends on how many are in the freezer, doesn't it?
  <Burimpu> I'd give my left vaginal wall to play AO properly!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906887
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.619730
text:
  Brian Laptop: myspace is like the vegas of the internet.... a
  lot of people want to go but no one wants to admit what
  happens when they're there


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906888
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.619777
text:
  <+FHC_> why is it guns are legal in america but a school
  shooter will miss most of his targets, but guns illegal in
  germany and the fuckers hit everything they aim at
  <@Sauce> american kids know how to strafe


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906888
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.619824
text:
  <Podex> AHOY! I SEE THAT THE FAG FLEET IS IN PORT.  MY INSULTS
  AND DISSING SHALL DECIMATE YOU LIKE A VERBAL PEARL HARBOR!
  *** Podex was kicked by Chipko (autokick for CAPS LOCK)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906888
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.619883
text:
  <Berrik> my goddamned school has fat cheerleaders
  <Berrik> let me tell you something
  <Berrik> there's only one half of a girl's chest I want to see
  jiggle when she jumps
  <Berrik> and it ain't the bottom half


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906888
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.619938
text:
  <Abit667> I am gonna try to get goldfish
  <Abit667> without getting busted
  <Bryan> k
  <Abit667> back
  <Abit667> only satan would put the huge goldfish box behind a
  bag of chips


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906889
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.619996
text:
  <BigBadGangsta> Not right now, trying to seduce a girl right
  now
  <BigBadGangsta> Mwhahahaha
  <BigBadGangsta> Damn, her dad came home, she had to sign off
  <IMJack> by that 'she' means "we don't have enough to convict
  you and my shift is over"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906889
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.620043
text:
  <Argent-> Call a few adoption agencies asking for a hot 17
  year-old girl with a birthday coming up, and they start with
  the suppoenas.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906890
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.620164
text:
  <Blade> what's for supper my beautiful wife?
  <Blade> you on a silver platter?
  <Blade> CPU: AMD Athlon Thunderbird clocked at 1453.26 MHz
  <Blade> OS: Microsoft Windows 98 Second Edition [4.10.2222]
  <Blade> RAM: 257MB / 512MB <29% load>
  <Blade> Video: NVIDIA GeForce2 MX/MX 400 (1024x768x16 bits)
  <63MB/64MB video RAM>
  <Blade> Sound: SB Live! Wave Device (Driver Version: 5.0)
  [Stereo]
  <Blade> Network Interfaces: NDIS 5.0 driver (Ethernet)
  <10000000 bps> [5.4 MB received / 0.3 MB sent]
  <Blade> Disk: a: ()[]: 0.0GB/0.0GB....c: (WINDOZE)[FAT32]:
  4.4GB/4.9GB....d: (BUZINESS)[FAT32]: 12.4GB/12.6GB....e:
  (PLEAZURE)[FAT32]: 22.0GB/23.7GB....f: ()[]: 0.0GB/0.0GB
  <Blade> Uptime: 0 days, 1 hrs, 2 mins, 3 secs
  <SK> what a great prelude to sex.
  <SK> system information.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906890
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.620315
text:
  <helminthes> hey i had a vision today of some fat old man with
  a dog sitting on campus and he goes, "hey, pet my dog" and i
  say, "heh no thanks i gotta go to class." "but the dog's cute,
  look at him." "no man, see ya" "DOG HATER!!! DOG HATER!! HE
  JUST HIT MY DOG IN THE FACE" {i run away}


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906891
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.620363
text:
  <psIRE> I had sex once, very tiring
  <Mulder> lol
  <Snipe> yeh me too.... oh wait no that was the time i
  installed linux


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906891
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.620434
text:
  <[cut]> fuckin russians made my ftp server crash last night.
  somebody from 212.46.194.123 -> ip-583.dialup.cl.spb.ru
  <hypr> hahhahwhaw
  <[cut]> what the fuck
  <[cut]> somebody from romainia tried to steal my leapFTP
  bookmark file
  <[cut]> (005570) 6/3/2001 12:04:28 AM - 56k (217.13.97.62) >
  asked to change directory : 'C:ftpmp3 -> C:ftpmp3C:PROGRAM
  FILESLEAPFTP' --> Access denied (No Such Directory).
  <[cut]> Resolved 217.13.97.62 to mflorin.soft.forte.ro
  <hypr> hahahahahaha
  <SysError> cut the foreigners want war with you
  <[cut]> i added to my welcome message.. IF ALL OFF YOU
  EUROPEAN/ASIAN FOREIGN FUCKS KEEP TRYING TO "HACK" ME. THE
  SERVER WILL GO PRIVATE.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906891
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.620488
text:
  <Trigger> anyone here know what kind of virus would create
  about 100 directories that don't exist?
  <Rakoth> windows
  <Adam9> or a corrupted filesystem
  <Rakoth> that's what I said ;)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906892
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.620539
text:
  <Deth[EHC]> Chromium: stop masturbating imma be home any
  minute :P
  *** Deth[EHC] has quit IRC (Leaving)
  <reptile-> Actually, that's a secret code for Chromium to get
  ready for the ass reaming of his life.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906892
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.620595
text:
  <Moeser> you don't chase whiskey
  <Moeser> you run away from it
  <Moeser> very swiftly
  <Moeser> and you don't make sudden moves


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906892
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.620664
text:
  <Snowman> How come I can't hack anything that I try to?
  <Snowman> I even used su... I just dont know what do do after
  that...
  <Snowman> Even when I have root...
  <TheFat> *sigh* you idiot...
  <TheFat> Dont you know, you need uber root not su...
  <Snowman> How do I get that
  <TheFat> run "halt" then "ur"
  <Snowman> Sweet, so i will hack things with ur?
  *** Signoff: Snowman (Disconnected)
  *** Snowman(poopie@host-209-111-188-107.clt.bellsouth.net) has
  joined channel #hackr
  <Snowman> Man... hacking is sooooo gay


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906892
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.620720
text:
  <Shandz> i just got an electric shock off the phone
  <Quicksilver> static or live?
  <Shandz> I dunno, think live
  <Shandz> cos when i stuck my hand in again it shocked me again
  *** Shandz is now known as Shandz|phone


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906893
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.620783
text:
  <marcc> What kind of company includes a program called "pimp
  ass newsreader" with a server OS
  <Ver> uhmm.. the company that makes "pimp ass newsreader"?
  <Kaeto> dude... your server has to have SOME way to get warez
  <marcc> But pimp ass newsreader? With a fucking OS that's
  supposedly made by people with jobs and stuff?
  <marcc> Why not include a Bitching Media Player, or
  Muthafuckin' Desktop
  <Dritzen> marcc:  What distro is that?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906893
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.620838
text:
  <Allen> what about Hall?
  <CactusJac> he died
  <Mikey316> he was arrested
  <Allen> make up your mind..
  <CactusJac> He was arrested for dying.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906893
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.620905
text:
  #natfans on GamesNET, 01 December 2002

  <dzee> want to try again sara
  <sara_sig> no
  <sara_sig> gay thing
  <sara_sig> too pissed off with it
  <dzee> why does it crash?
  <sara_sig> .
  <sara_sig> ^ see that?
  <sara_sig> That is a concentrated ball of rage
  <sara_sig> Refined hatred poured into one small dot
  <sara_sig> "why does it crash" is possibly the only question
  that can merit an outpouring like that
  <sara_sig> I simply cannot even be sarcastic about it
  <sara_sig> It goes way beyond that


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906894
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.620965
text:
  <electr0n> shitty, house broken into yesterday
  <electr0n> second time in under a year. hell under 6 months
  <electr0n> took my ps2 and laptop
  <electr0n> bastards.
  <electr0n> I am glad I hadn't bought a 360 because then i
  would be really pissed
  <pluis> nah, they'd never be able to escape while carrying the
  360's power adapter


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906894
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.621025
text:
  <TheThree> your special?
  <Mj> you're
  <TheThree> sorry my grammer sucks
  <Mj> grammar
  <TheThree> as dose my spelling
  <Mj> does
  <TheThree> i give up
  <Mj> I


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906894
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.621076
text:
  ***Welcome to MSN Support***
  <MSN Assistant> Hello how can I help?
  <Divination> I recently downloaded msn 6.2 and it has been
  giving me problems
  <MSN Assistant> Yes, please continue.
  <Divination> I can t stop drinking I think I ve turned into an
  alcoholic
  *MSN Assistant has left the conversation.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906894
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.621133
text:
  <smarti> hi
  <smarti> im 18m from sydney
  <smarti> australia
  <smarti> any one to chat
  <smarti> msg me
  <Beerman> as opposed to sydney new zealand


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906895
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.621183
text:
  <Luigi30> someone ping flood 127.0.0.1
  <Luigi30> he keeps trying to hack me
  <Luigi30> nm
  <Floach> This, folks, is why Mario always gets the Princess.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906895
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.621241
text:
  <Kanush> it's funny, when I tell someone I'm an insomniac they
  almost always say "that's odd, I fall asleep as soon as my
  head hits the pillow" which is odd becuase I don't go around
  telling blind people "that's odd because I can see perfectly"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906896
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.621342
text:
  <Daleks|> guys i'm seeking for mid 90's hip hop song
  <Daleks|> that going like this "na, na na na na, na na na na
  na..."
  <asterax> ...


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906896
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.621393
text:
  <niles> when it comes to women
  <niles> only one thing should be in latex
  <niles> my prosthetic leg


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906896
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.621438
text:
  Zipalooie: i'd rather walk home from boston on train tracks
  drunk
  Zipalooie: and blindfolded
  Zipalooie: with headphones on blasting slayer at full volume
  Zipalooie: than get in a car with your sister again


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906896
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.621494
text:
  <Otakutard> Dude... if you put the words "I want to have sex
  with you until the sun goes down." into a translator, and
  translate it into Dutch, then back to english
  <Otakutard> it comes out
  <Otakutard> I want slaughtered with you have to the sun
  decrease.
  <Otakutard> Kinky dutchlanders


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906897
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.621544
text:
  <LDopa^^^> People are dancing around a burning baby? Where?
  Where? I hope they are playing some kickin' music....


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906897
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.621593
text:
  * ProdigalGenius (~cicilianr@resnet65-241.ucr.edu) Quit (Read
  error: Connection reset by peer)
  <Namen> Who is peer and why is he running around the net
  resetting connections?
  <Inquisitor> Peer is a drunkard who beats his kids and resets
  connections because his inability to retain fluids, more
  specifically of an urinal nature, prevents him from remaining
  dry for more than 20 minutes, causing him much ridicule and
  disdain.  This is a frustration which has scarred him, and
  some accounts inform that he has been seen wading on his own
  pool of piss screaming "I AM NO BEDWETTER I AM NO BEDWETTER".


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906897
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.621658
text:
  <FLB> once sex tv showed a room full of women masturbating
  <FLB> it was an "orgasm class"
  <FLB> and they all go there
  <Kamikaze_Watermelon> did you tape it?
  <FLB> and in a group
  <FLB> finger themselves.
  <FLB> Umm
  <FLB> No.
  <Kamikaze_Watermelon> bastard
  <FLB> I was uhh....
  <FLB> taking notes?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906898
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.621716
text:
  <FairWtns> You know what I love about 'Law & Order'?
  <Badtz> nope
  <Badtz> do tell
  <FairWtns> It's hard to find a channel which isn't playing it
  some time during the day.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906898
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.621774
text:
  <error[dw]> you are a SICK SICK MAN
  <GuyIncognito> It's delicious.  Can only find it in
  Philadelphia/Delaware area.
  <GuyIncognito> About two years back, they ACTUALLY HAD ON THE
  LABEL of Hormel Scrapple "No pig anus!"
  <AvatarADV> Man, how poor do you have to be to voluntarily eat
  something that has "no pig anus!" on the label and consider it
  a selling point?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906898
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.621823
text:
  <Powerslave> haha love this ticket pushed to me from our help
  desk:  "modem making squeeking sound when connecting, needs
  replaced"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906898
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.621869
text:
  <abdooooooooo> there is deffeclt ststes we have to talk about
  it whan the you face it (speaciel when you are strenger in
  other land).(ÇøÍ íÇ Òãä ÇáÚÌÇíÈ ÇáÐí ÇÐÇ ÝÊÍÊ Ýãß ÞÇáæÇ ãÏÑí
  ãÇáß)i want to talk about man that was in his way with peasce
  and with succece and suddnly people(who isnt know who are them
  untel now)want to (may be)made defamation or not .(he doesnt
  know ).the important thing he is trying to uncover them.he
  doesnt know what is round to him and they d


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906899
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.622065
text:
  <Volt9000> My friend asked me to be in his movie
  <Volt9000> I think Im gonna do it
  <Volt9000> I must admit my acting skills aren't the greatest
  <Volt9000> But I do have SOME acting experience
  <tsingtao> <Volt9000> I've managed to convince my whole school
  that I'm straight!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906900
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.622121
text:
  <darkrift> 10 bucks I'm gonna be the only one wearing hobbit
  ears and strapped with my ork sword at lord of the rings 2.
  <Cano> and u'll get beat down
  <darkrift> uhm no
  <darkrift> hello
  <darkrift> ork detecing sword.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906900
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.622183
text:
  <iNoah> "hi, I'm a lisp virus.  please read me with an emacs
  mail reader and eval me."
  <moof> (defun email-virus-hook 'my-virus)
  <iNoah> s/defun /add-hook '/
  <kermit> Noah takes defun out of everything.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906900
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.622235
text:
  <Lestat> I can't just turn on the funny like some fountain of
  funny.
  <ally> ...
  <ally> why the fuck not?
  <Lestat> I have to milk it from the special cows.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906901
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.622348
text:
  <MGS05> vegans are the most enviromentally unsound people
  <MGS05> they totally take advantage of "survival of the
  fittest"
  <MGS05> the plants can't move
  <MGS05> they can


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906901
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.622391
text:
  ( PuffinFreshWog ) I gOT a NeW wINAmP Vis, it MAKEs my
  KeYbOaRd liGHTS FLaSH IN bEAt WIth tHe MUsIc... TOo Bad IT
  ActUAllY effecTs tHe CapS LoCk :O(


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906902
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.622441
text:
  <ater> how bout a tamigotchi game with a chinktwat
  <ater> your only options would be "Do Math" "Practice Violin"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906902
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.622495
text:
  <+div0> hm... if an infinite number of monkeys typed like wild
  on typewriters... how many would be arrested for copyright
  violations?
  <@CCFreak2K> Exactly half of them.
  <@CCFreak2K> Even if that means half of a monkey is arrestred.
  <@CCFreak2K> So be it.
  <@CCFreak2K> This world's an asshole.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906902
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.622545
text:
  <CrdStang> Oh dear
  <CrdStang> Oh fuck dear no
  <CrdStang> My stupid ass dad just drove the ride-on lawn mower
  here from his place 3/4 of a mile away


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906903
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.622604
text:
  <|-|LoD|-|> What website?
  <danno> one of my side employments
  <danno> redesigning the website for a dance studio
  <danno> my girlfriend is a teacher there
  <|-|LoD|-|> ooh
  <|-|LoD|-|> Dancers are flexible ^_^
  <danno> ya
  <danno> but they can also kick hard >_<


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906903
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.622657
text:
  <Eukanuba> what time is it in the usa atm ?
  <BludClot> 8:40 - 12:40
  <FireFox12> wrong
  <FireFox12> its 5:45 in california
  <BludClot> oh, I wasn't sure which way the timezones went :P


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906903
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.622708
text:
  * Curt stabs Stinger in the face with a generic object
  <Curt> whee.
  <The_Stinger> hey why do you find it neccesary to stab me in
  the face with a generic object
  <The_Stinger> o_O
  <Curt> because I didn't have a specific object at hand.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906903
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.622767
text:
  <LordHelmet> FYI, The Last Jedi is up on the Corsair Cove.
  <FailBetter> The what?
  <LordHelmet> The Buccaneer Marina.
  <PewLaser> you mean The Swashbuckler Lagoon?
  <PewLaser> The Arrrrrbour?
  <PewLaser> The Privateer Basin?
  <PewLaser> Marauder Gulf?
  <LordHelmet> Pirate Bay.
  <PewLaser> aww, you ruined it. #ComboBreaker


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906904
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.622817
text:
  <blazemore> my chair is starting to smell bad from me farting
  in it so much
  <blazemore> either that or it's the underwear i've been
  wearing for 4 days


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906904
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.622862
text:
  DarkLerner: My Away Msg Is Creative Check It Ouy
  My Own God 13 13: ...

  Auto response from DarkLerner: Sleepz.

  My Own God 13 13: o god
  My Own God 13 13: thats awsome


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906904
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.622965
text:
  <zimalicious> size doesnt matter. as long as you know how to
  use it.
  <Ralp> But size does matter if you have no idea what you're
  doing?
  <Mattress> hmm, I didn't really have any idea what I was doing
  and it was apparently awesome, does that mean I have a big
  penis?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906906
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.623097
text:
  <Nirvana000> So I went to Wal-Mart today to try and buy a copy
  of San Andreas.
  <Nirvana000> I couldn't see any copies on the shelves so I
  went to the counter to ask. The girl didn't speak a word of
  English. I tried asking her "Do you have San Andreas for sale?
  " in a REALLY slow and clear tone, but she just shrugged her
  shoulders. Then she said something in Spanish over the
  speakers.
  <Nirvana000> I was REALLY getting pissed at this point.
  <Nirvana000> She must have called the manager, cos he came up
  to the counter and started asking me in poor English what I
  wanted.
  <Nirvana000> Me: "Do you have San Andreas? SAN ANDREAS!"
  <Nirvana000> Him: "SAN FERNANDO!?!?!"
  <Nirvana000> Me: "WTF? SAN ANDREAS!"
  <Nirvana000> Him: "AAH, SAN FERNANDO!"
  <Nirvana000> He went into the back muttering something about
  San Fernando. WTF?
  <Nirvana000> Couple minutes later he came out with a copy of
  Madden NFL 2004. He was waving it around, and he wouldn't stop
  saying "SAN FERNANDO! SAN FERNANDO!"
  <Nirvana000> And then I just left.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906907
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.623167
text:
  <weebl> i might have a meet saturday morning
  <weebl> cuz of that fucker
  <weebl> who took a shit in wakefield's pool
  <weebl> the remeet might be like, 8 in the fuckin' morning
  <DoubleHelix> LOL!
  <DoubleHelix> someone drop'd a deuce in the pool!
  <DoubleHelix> lol
  <DoubleHelix> wtf is that shit
  <weebl> yeah
  <weebl> and they didn't notice till after the divers had gone
  <DoubleHelix> HAHAH!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906907
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.623296
text:
  Rabidplaybunny87: It is better to be pissed off than pissed
  on.
  DAGREATONE951: Tell that to r. kelly.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906908
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.623350
text:
  * Lexica-chan watches an ep of Yugioh. :)
  <[chibi]> how come they can't tell when he magically doubles
  in size
  <[chibi]> "there's something a bit different about
  him..more...confidence?"
  <[chibi]> NO YOU FUCKWITS, HE JUST HIT PUBERTY IN THE BLINK OF
  AN EYE


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906908
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.623403
text:
  <Supe> <Beelzebub> www.xxxxxxxxx.com/gulfgirls2004 SeX SeX SeX
  !!
  <Supe> beelze are you trying to harbour viruses?
  <Beelzebub> nothing wrong with viruses
  <Beelzebub> they are part of the natural selection process on
  the internet


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906910
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.623731
text:
  <Kemikal> ImMzee: I think I am haveing a heart attack
  <Kemikal> ImMzee: hands are numb legs are numb eyes are blurry
  and heart is raceing
  <Kemikal> Kemikal: nah, jess your left arm goes numb when its
  a heart attack
  <Kemikal> Kemikal: your having a stroke
  <Kemikal> havent gotten a response from him in 30min now...
  <Kemikal> wonder if I should call someone
  <DiLATED> lol


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906910
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.623848
text:
  <Raven> Come, boy wonder! We shall rid the world of crime!
  <monkeymilk> yes! together we will thwart evil-doers and
  criminals alike!
  <Raven> To the batcave!
  <monkeymilk> wait, my download just finished
  <monkeymilk> 20 minutes of gun point rape
  <monkeymilk> or so the description says
  * monkeymilk is away - away
  <Raven> ...Maybe he's trying to think up ways to save the
  girl. =/
  <Robocop> he never said girl, could be two guys
  <Raven> ...
  <Raven> So, Robocop, are you prepared to clense the world of
  evil in the name of justice, as my trusty sidekick?
  <Robocop> no i'm busy trying to find a good site for making a
  pipe-bomb
  * Raven is starting to think IRC isn't the best place to start
  his superhero campaign.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906911
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.623890
text:
  bp: how did my collar get popped
  bp: srsly my neck felt weird so i felt it and my collar was
  popped without any physical intervention from me
  esch: you have a douchebag poltergeist


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906911
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.623934
text:
  Benjyman: man everyone knows there's a black superman though,
  whatsisface....steel
  Benjyman: by day hes mild mannered shaquille oneal


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906911
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.623977
text:
  castuslumen: whats the name of those hats that Green Berets
  wear?
  foranzan: are you being stupid on purpose?
  castuslumen: what?
  foranzan: you are officially the Rolls Royce of stupid.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906911
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.624026
text:
  <l0g1c> Does giving handjobs make you go blind??
  <ApOkAliPs> HAHA
  <ApOkAliPs> well...
  <ApOkAliPs> depends where you aim it...


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906912
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.624079
text:
  ( Tranks ) when i try to go on my webcam it says 'Sorry you
  have no video capture hardware' << whats that o.0 /q
  ( Voltage ) I thought the police told you to stop using webcam
  after you got caught flashing to 13 year old  bisexual boys
  ( Tranks ) I havnt bin caught
  ( Voltage ) so you do flash to 13 year old boys
  Tranks has left #Cyber
  ( Fr0r3 ) Voltage you prick i didnt get his msn


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906912
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.624127
text:
  <D`Kay> Hmm.. what would it be called where you take someone's
  phone number and get the address from it?
  <Rail> Stalking.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906912
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.624175
text:
  <whit> regardless that i like my womens to have badonkadonk
  asses
  <whit> and drink 40s before i slam my big meat pole up there
  <whit> nothing like the feeling that you are fucking one of
  those Big Arbys roast beef sandwiches with extra sauce.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906912
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.624224
text:
  [03:11] (twistedps) i believe im highly antisocial.
  [03:11] <aqualyricist> ha
  [03:11] <nightbreed420> me to tps
  [03:12] <aqualyricist> i am so antisocial that i write down my
  orders at fast food carryouts
  [03:12] <aqualyricist> drive throughs are a bitch tho
  [03:12] (twistedps) haha yeah thats damn antisocial.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906913
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.624274
text:
  *** Now talking in #cars
  *** Topic is 'No gay sex talk please thanks'
  <spazzer> no gay sex talk eh?
  <spazzer> this channel is going to be quiet then


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906913
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.624318
text:
  chaseaskew9642: I'm going to get a restaurant to compete with
  crackerbarrell and I will call it niggerbucket.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906913
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.624369
text:
  <dnc> yesterday ivana had some friends over, and they were
  flicking through the tv channels, and accidentally hit the
  input selector - and got the pc tv out input... and spent like
  30 minutes watching me play halo thinking it was a tv show
  <dnc> glad i wasnt looking at hardcore pr0n


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906914
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.624461
text:
  ruide: hey chris, stop fuckin cybering and let me show you
  something
  cyph33r: what
  cyph33r: i dont cyber cockbite, i have a gf
  ruide: haha
  cyph33r: what did you want to show me
  ruide: i made an account on that scrabble website you go to
  ruide: bubblegal_14
  cyph33r: wtf
  cyph33r: omg fuck you you fucking prick
  ruide: chrisharker: i slide two fingers into your tight
  asshole
  cyph33r: YOU ARE A FUCKING FAGGOT YOU KNOW THAT
  cyph33r: I FUCKING HATE YOU
  ruide: chrisharker: i've never done this before, am i doing it
  right?
  cyph33r: FUCK OFF YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906914
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.624509
text:
  <SaintAlvus> I wrote a book on an object that lets you
  accelerate the passage of time.
  <Bean> What was it called?
  <SaintAlvus> Bong Mechanics


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906915
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.624648
text:
  <@amoeba> hey, what's the keyboard shortcut to discard the
  current buffer in emacs?
  <@thatguy> do you have 12 fingers


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906915
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.624704
text:
  <mojo>parents are weird
  <mojo>So there I am playing my drums just now
  <mojo>first im "skating on thin ice"
  <mojo>and I keep going
  <mojo>now aparently im "in hot water"
  <mojo>go figure


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906916
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.624764
text:
  <jimiw> billy put on channel 10
  <jimiw> too late
  <Evil_One> w00t!
  <Evil_One> I don't have to get up!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906916
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.624834
text:
  <caspah> I woke up
  <caspah> half on the couch
  <caspah> half off
  <caspah> with no clothes on
  <caspah> and a condom next to ther couch
  <djcrom> used?
  <caspah> yeah
  <caspah> BUT
  <caspah> my gf left last night
  <caspah> she went to a friends
  <caspah> my gf wasn't here
  <Vapno> was your ass sore?
  <caspah> actually yeash


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906916
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.624886
text:
  <Kraide> Wow, that line you used was repetitive and redundant.
  <Jer1400> That's was ironically ironical!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906916
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.624932
text:
  <Amanda> USER             TTY      FROM              LOGIN@
  IDLE WHAT
  <Amanda> amanda           p0       ppp152.acelink.n  2:46AM
  - pico vi-tutorial


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906917
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.624987
text:
  <Dreaded_Fist[using_AOL]> I've had the internet since I was 9
  <Dreaded_Fist[using_AOL]> course back then, when I looked for
  porn, I'd type "pictures of men and woman having sex"
  <rpliving> now u just type in "pictures of men"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906917
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.625033
text:
  <r0y_g3rb1l> police stations are clubs for thick-skulled short
  dicked racist gun-nuts that took every civil-ass test they
  could because no one else hires people that put "former nigger
  beater" on their resume.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906918
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.625152
text:
  <DuTcHiN> U know how you get all lazy and wash your clothes at
  the last minute?
  <EVILeye04> Um, yeah
  <DuTcHiN> Well i was ready to go out to this party right, so
  there i was irc'ing in my shirt and boxers waiting for the
  load of washing to finish..... and i hear my ride beep from
  out the front, so i log off, grab my phoe, wallet and half-wet
  pants from the wash and throw them on and as i am bout to get
  out the door mum yells 'Wait' so i go 'no time mum' and hop in
  the car. By the time we get to the city and get out there is
  this weird smell.....
  <EVILeye04> and????
  <DuTcHiN> And then i turn on my mobile phone and see '1
  message received' from 'mum' ---> Sorry i tried to get you to
  come back, the cat puked in the washing machine.           So
  i had to spend the rest of the night in my stinky pants and
  all the chicks looked at me funny. :(


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906918
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.625243
text:
  <@skold> is this going to be a 'my penis is bigger than yours'
  conversation? cuz i have a ruler and a camera.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906919
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.625341
text:
  <Kokanshu> does anyone else have the urge to call the
  operators up and say 'I NEED AN EXIT, FAST!'


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906919
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.625393
text:
  <dcsteve> is there a way to easily convert a mac game to pc
  <SinisterTengu> yeah...I don't think you can just "convert" it
  <dcsteve> why not
  <dcsteve> mac and pc keyboards are virtually the same


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906919
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.625448
text:
  *** Now talking in #athlon
  *** Topic is '<pitz_> just good ol fashioned diesel talk
  <---I  thought this was Taxi Cab Confessions?'
  *** Set by Richter!
  ~richter@pontiacil-240.illinois.prairieinet.net on Tue Nov 26
  23:37:20
  <Weng> Diesel talk: What goes on in truck stop diners when
  teenage prostitutes are absent
  <Weng> Suddenly, pitz appears out of nowhere and refutes the
  idea that semis use true diesel because there is no
  "Freightliner FL70 TDI"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906920
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.625522
text:
  <Sh0t> i'll be honest
  <Sh0t> I'd fuck Calista Flockhart
  <tjommi> is that possible?
  <tjommi> my dick is fatter than her
  <Phalanx`> you might break her
  <Phalanx`> be careful there
  <xylol> who cares
  <Sh0t> she gained weight
  <Sh0t> if you've seen her recently
  <DeathVipr> after you blow your load in her, her weight
  doubles
  <tjommi> id like to see that
  <tuffguy> lol dv
  <tjommi> LOL


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906920
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.625574
text:
  <randomnine> i bet the internal age variable is protected
  <randomnine> it's always accessible to anything that inherits
  <Entrope> i can understand making getAge() protected or
  private, but there should definitely be a public isLegal()
  function


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906920
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.625629
text:
  <ateteen> somery: I'm a professional Common Lisp developer and
  faraday-cage technician.
  <sklib> if you mention common lisp again
  <sklib> I will fucking put a knife up your butt
  <sklib> and carve myself a hamburger


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906920
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.625681
text:
  <guest> u kno what rules
  <guest> introducing girls to pot
  <yesue> no lie
  <guest> u smoke pot alone with a girl for the first time
  <guest> there is a 250% chance of getting laid


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906921
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.625732
text:
  <OwnerDemon> It kind of sucks now that there are so many
  computer jokes and innuendos on bash.org that people like me
  can't understand them.
  <TheOne> 7|-|47z (|_|z j0012 4 f|_||<1n9 DUMB4SS!
  <OwnerDemon> Exactly.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906921
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.625779
text:
  <zamros> when i was seven i saw a car get run over by another
  car
  <zamros> my first accident witnessing
  <zamros> and/or moster truck rally


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906921
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.625830
text:
  <schnorks> One time I used a sock as a glove.
  <Rivorus> One time i used a glove for a condom.
  <schnorks> ...
  <Rivorus> okay... five times


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906922
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.625879
text:
  <mage> it will be nice to be back in america
  <sparks> I feel the same way
  <sparks> having come from alabama


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906922
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.625977
text:
  <the_Speed_Bump> I have a severe, irrational phobia against
  midgets with red hair who wear black trenchcoats and sell
  kitchen cleaners in back alleys behind hotels whose names
  start with the letter 'U'.
  <the_Speed_Bump> Every day is a struggle.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906922
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.626027
text:
  iHeartDonKnotts: I just got a prank call from http://
  whitepages.com/search/Reverse_Phone?npa=313&phone=3430570
  iHeartDonKnotts: Showed up on caller ID
  iHeartDonKnotts: And then internet saved the day
  iHeartDonKnotts: I'm gonna letterbomb the place
  Verl Is BOSS: what did they say
  iHeartDonKnotts: I called back and said "Hi, I just got a call
  from this number... Who the fuck are you and why are you
  calling Southern California for a prank call?"
  Verl Is BOSS: owned?
  iHeartDonKnotts: Probably!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906923
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.626078
text:
  < passagero> i'm romanian man,i have 18yers old and try to
  found some one who want to have a relation sheep with me
  < passagero> is someone amateur?
  < BSDgeek> passagero: the amater sheep are in your back yard,
  go mount one


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906923
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.626123
text:
  <EK> What if the war in Afghanistan was fought with midgets!
  <Jei> With midgets as infantry, or as ammunition?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906923
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.626170
text:
  <sab0tage> who thinks an Imperial Star Destroyer could take a
  borg cube?
  *** sab0tage was kicked by Q (You are BANNED from this
  channel.)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906924
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.626220
text:
  <meatpie> Cuz I'm a mean nasty cruel asshole who wants to make
  the entire world eat a loaf of his shit while he stands on
  high and has his schlong adored by a bunch of really hot red
  heads with bald snatch!!!!!!!!!!!
  <dorqus> meatpie: you sound like marilyn manson


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906924
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.626266
text:
  Andy: when I finish a song, I automaticly hate it.
  Nielzor: that's quite a healthy attitude, though, I think,
  hating what you've created
  Andy: like punching babies!
  Nielzor: EXACTLY


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906924
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.626328
text:
  <wenko> today in java the prof asked the class for a simple
  iterator where we can  use some math
  <wenko> so this one guy pipes up and says "Make it an address
  book, and It will calcuate the percentage of girls that slept
  with you"
  <wenko> the prof looks up and says "I can't do that", meaning
  its not appropriate
  <wenko> so the guy yells back "why not?"
  <wenko> and the first thing that came to mind i said "You get
  an error when you divide by zero"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906924
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.626379
text:
  <ckx> i used to drink
  <ckx> now i just inject it straight into my arm
  <ckx> i think i'm in the upper epsilion of alcoholism


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906925
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.626468
text:
  <Kel> [kel@purgatory~]% sudo cp ~rick/newshots ~kel/.
  <Kel> cp: cannot stat `/home/rick/newshots': No such file or
  directory
  <Kel> [kel@purgatory~]% oh wait
  <Rick_Hunter> newshot, not newshots :P
  <Kel> typo
  <Rick_Hunter> lol.
  <Rick_Hunter> [kel@purgatory~]% oh wait
  <Rick_Hunter> ^_^
  <Kel> huh?
  <Kel> you punk, you screen'd my terminal didn'cha? :P
  <Rick_Hunter> I what?
  <Kel> how'd you know I did that?
  <Rick_Hunter> You pasted it. :P
  <Kel> I did?
  <Kel> oh
  <Kel> ha ha ha
  <Rick_Hunter> bash.org
  <Rick_Hunter> ^_^
  <Kel> no!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906925
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.626521
text:
  <madwoota> rice rockets are for fags and shrivel dicks
  <madwoota> 'hey baby, lets hump in the wrx..' 'sorry, cant
  even get my panties off in here'


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906925
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.626568
text:
  Reject: My best friend crashed on the sofa last night, so I
  left her a note saying come up whenever you wake up.
  Reject: At about 5 in the morning, i'm woken up by laugher.
  Reject: Apparently, I was spooning with my dog.
  Reject: I will *never* live that down


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906926
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.626623
text:
  <Phaze> SOME HOT CHICK
  <Phaze> JUST MAILED ME
  <Phaze> HER NEW PICS
  <Phaze> WOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
  <N1k1tA> me too
  <N1k1tA> she also offered penis enlargement
  <N1k1tA> and home loans


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906926
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.626718
text:
  queenren24: i need your advice
  queenren24: cause you're a guy and all
  MrFluffyPants26: that I am
  queenren24: what would you, as a guy, rather have for your
  birthday or christmas: a video game or that axe stuff that
  smells SOOO good?
  MrFluffyPants26: Axe DOES smell good...
  MrFluffyPants26: what video game?
  queenren24: rome: total war
  MrFluffyPants26: hm...
  MrFluffyPants26: probably the game
  MrFluffyPants26: but give him sexual favors too
  MrFluffyPants26: can't go wrong with that
  queenren24: :O
  MrFluffyPants26: precisely


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906927
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.626858
text:
  <Black_Mage> i need the program that enables you to make
  flash; damned if i remember what it's called
  <Assgoblin> ...flash.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906927
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.626907
text:
  <atila> my pc just shocked me
  <atila> I touched my cd-r and it went "bzzzzzzzzzzzzzt"
  <ivilgrue> must be an anti-piracy system


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906928
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.626959
text:
  <tokumei> green tea incense yo
  <tokumei> and no pot for me today
  <PFunk> Trying to quit?
  <JeffreyAtW> Ooh, Toku's turning Republican and lying about
  his heavy drug use instead of admitting it


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906928
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.627050
text:
  <aversion> i was takin a dump today in the stalls
  <aversion> and someone stuck their dick through a hole
  <aversion> i didnt even get to finish


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906928
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.627095
text:
  Be1ial: remember the old arcade games that had a message from
  the president about saying no to drugs?
  Krizkor: haha yeah.
  Krizkor: because of that blue screen before mortal kombat, i
  stayed off drugs.
  Krizkor: but unfortunately, i began pulling people's spines
  out.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906929
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.627151
text:
  <zophar>I think you're taking their feelings in the wrong way.
  Some people just happen to like the game. Obviosuly you don't
  care that much, and thats cool. But it's your opinion, and
  some people would like to really play this game the way its
  meant to be played, full final product, without all the insane
  amount of cheating in it. O_o;
  <Galigmus_Ruune> who cares
  <Galigmus_Ruune> cheaters make the game more lifelike
  * com4 goes back to warcraft 3 so he can cheat and kill faster
  than those stupid orcs


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906929
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.627248
text:
  <VFR8> My band teacher let me try to learn tuba yesterday in
  the music room when there was nobody else there
  <VFR8> I tried blowing too hard and I passed out X|
  <VFR8> He came in at the end of the period and found me
  unconscious on the floor with the tuba lying next to me
  <VFR8> I wish I could have seen the look on his face...


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906930
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.627307
text:
  <Jumper> which one are you reading ?
  <snot> security experts ( news.com.com )
  <Jumper> ah, news.com that redirects to news.com.com for
  unfatomable reasons
  <Jumper> I guess they weren't commy enough
  <Jumper> haw haw, get it ?? RED BASTARDS
  <snot> they where news.com.com.com before the .com bust, guess
  they just playing it safe
  <Jumper> yeah, they must've hyped down now


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906930
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.627355
text:
  <@GeNOc|DE> damn i wanna bone the lead singer of evanescence
  <@eught> what does she looks like?
  <@GeNOc|DE> sex


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906932
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.627447
text:
  [talking about kuwait]
  everbong: i almost got blowed up back in the day.. thats how i
  got the name everbong
  MaxGripper: really?
  MaxGripper: what happened?
  everbong: this lady came up to a small group of us, saying
  something, and i was like "everbong?? wtf??" we started to
  walk away and she exploded
  everbong: apparantly she was saying "i have a bomb" in fail
  english


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906932
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.627526
text:
  <@Miss_Morgan> heh
  <@Miss_Morgan> ok get this
  <@Miss_Morgan> I came up with a marketing campaign for a new
  cereal
  <@Miss_Morgan> I was staring at some fruit loops I poured
  myself
  <@Miss_Morgan> and after about 5 minutes of staring and
  munching, I realized something
  <@Miss_Morgan> red... orange... yellow... green... blue...
  violet
  <@Miss_Morgan> it's the 6-color rainbow!
  <@Miss_Morgan> so get this
  <@Miss_Morgan> in an approaching perspective and going up,
  stars and glitter-things coming off of the name
  <@Miss_Morgan> Hom-O's
  <@Miss_Morgan> and have three gay guys in the corner of the
  box
  <@Miss_Morgan> on the bottom of the front pane, there'll be
  the slogan
  <@Miss_Morgan> "They're fruity, they're colorful, they're
  fabulous!"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906932
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.627574
text:
  <bytraper> its because your gay syn
  <Synoptica> and you are illiterate
  <bytraper> maybe but it sure beats the hell out of being gay


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906933
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.627632
text:
  <@Toys> i got allways with wings in the mail today
  <@Toys> it comes with dry weave, and wings, and optional
  fuckign sunroof <@Toys> i tried one on and i didn't feel
  CONFIDENT
  <@Toys> i felt WORRIED as fuck
  <@Toys> i'm using them for coffee filters now


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906933
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.627681
text:
  <marduk> why do all the 14-year old girls at my school have
  completely impossible crushes, like orlando bloom?
  <marduk> why don't they go for someone more realistic?
  <marduk> like r. kelly.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906933
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.627732
text:
  (dariball_) n8 all
  (jason-) i think it means night.
  (jason-) but i'm not leet enough like that.
  (Xentac) hehehe
  (Xentac) but night ends in ite... and 8 ends in ate...
  (Xentac) so he's saying nate
  (jason-) i can understand like "i 8 your chicken because it
  looked at my prost8."
  (jason-) that makes more sense
  (jason-) well kinda.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906934
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.627842
text:
  <deadpewl> dude
  <Darn> hmmm I'm wondoring about these ranchos
  <deadpewl> this dumb slut is at my house
  <deadpewl> she wont leave
  <deadpewl> but she wont fuck me
  <deadpewl> wtf
  <deadpewl> but she buys me beer and food
  <deadpewl> so I guess she can stay
  <TheDrip> just shove your cock in her mouth, and if she done
  like it, throw her out
  <deadpewl> brb


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906934
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.627895
text:
  <Keitaro`> i just watched this tech tv interview with a
  software pirate that got caught
  <Keitaro`> he had a server at work, with 1.5 TERABYTES of
  warez
  <Jerec> TB.. wow
  <Jerec> to even see a TB on a computer
  <Jerec> thats like seeing bigfoot
  <Jerec> or Jesus


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906935
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.627991
text:
  <JBB> I'm looking for a laptop that I can just use on the net.
  Something below $300.
  <BondOO7> You'd have better luck shoving your cock into a
  telephone jack for the internet.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906935
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.628042
text:
  <bumr> maybe he makes mad love to the penguin
  <dys> Perhaps Cathy wears a Tux the Penguin suit for him.
  <dys> And then he "debugs her code" all night long.
  <bumr> cunnilinux


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906935
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.628189
text:
  <w3nis> people with down syndrome are all "Hey check us out we
  have an extra chromosome, weeee, wipe our ass"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906936
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.628261
text:
  Trauma Kittten: OMG
  MY CAT JUST JIZZED ON ME
  Trauma Kittten:
  EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW
  lordviram: hahahahahahahahahahahahahahah
  lordviram: wtf didi you do to it?
  lordviram: i didnt know you were into all that
  lordviram: lol
  lordviram: wow
  Trauma Kittten: well he's a longhair cat
  Trauma Kittten: and sometimes his pants get matted
  Trauma Kittten: so i was holding him on my lap
  Trauma Kittten: and he was purring with his eyes closed and i'm like
  trying to untangle them
  Trauma Kittten: then i realized one of the bunches wasn't a tangle, it was
  his nuts
  Trauma Kittten: they both kinda feel the same
  Trauma Kittten: then my hand gets a glob of clear stuff on it
  lordviram: wow
  Trauma Kittten: i'm gonna kill myself
  lordviram: that's just
  lordviram: hahahahaha
  Trauma Kittten: i just jerked my cat off
  lordviram: i'd say something but nothing can really add to the effect of
  admitting you just jerked off your cat
  Trauma Kittten: heh....
  Trauma Kittten: i'm surprised that one didn't make it to your profile heh
  lordviram: that's cuz i'm gonna post that to bash.org
  lordviram: LOL
  Trauma Kittten: !
  lordviram: ....wow
  Trauma Kittten: OH NO
  Trauma Kittten: the cat is back
  Trauma Kittten: heh
  lordviram: maybe it wants to return the favor
  lordviram: heh
  Trauma Kittten: well there was one site i saw where it recommended putting
  whipped cream on your clit and letting em lick it off
  Trauma Kittten: but i wouldn' go that far, i don't think
  lordviram: you dont think?
  lordviram: o.0
  lordviram: well. you did just jack off your cat.
  Trauma Kittten: BUT I DIDN'T MEAN TO FOR THE LOVE OF GOD
  Trauma Kittten: i was just trying to make him have nice pants
  lordviram: you are one freaky chick


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906936
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.628319
text:
  <Rice_Boy> look at the sys requirements for interdev:
  www.free-trial-sex.com
  <Rice_Boy> er... http://msdn.microsoft.com/vinterdev/prodinfo/
  sysreq.asp
  <iheartsql> HAHAHAHAHA
  <iheartsql> HAHAHAHAHA
  <iheartsql> PRON HEAD
  <Rice_Boy> my bad
  <Rice_Boy> damn


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906936
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.628361
text:
  RaceTM: yeah its really weird
  it seems like every time i re-install, something goes wrong
  RaceTM: i have yet to get a flawless ghost image
  RaceTM: its pissing me off
  lol
  RaceTM: and im sure its probably one dumb program i always
  install that messes things up
  Veritech Ferret: hehe
  Veritech Ferret: Windows


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906937
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.628452
text:
  <KaMeN> I just realized the only reason I would go to
  narcotics anonymous would be to get hookups for drugs


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906937
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.628500
text:
  <TeNcHi420> i went to this store to buy a pipe, and there was
  only one left, and hes all "its unbreakable" so i was like
  thats pretty cool, but then he starts bangin it on the tble,
  and im like ok stop, but he says, "no look, you can hit it how
  ever many times and it wont break.." on about the 7th or 8th
  smack on the table the thing shatters....i almost knoked his
  dumbass out


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906937
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.628547
text:
  <PuyoDead> gahaha, I'm watching some porn live cam, and the
  girl is just sitting there eating doughnuts


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906938
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.628592
text:
  <kuhbaert> Yoda: The other side is dark.. very dark.
  <kuhbaert> Obiwan: Quit whining and eat your toast already


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906938
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.628643
text:
  toonces344: <ooze> take a hot swedish chick from behind, bend
  over to her ear. and whisper "i have aids", then try to keep
  your penis inside of her.
  <ooze> thats swedish rodeo.
  toonces344: i sent that quote to my girlfriend over AIM, and
  then she was silent for about 10 mins.
  toonces344: i asked her what was up, and she blocked me, so i
  im'ed one of her friends, and she told me that she was
  swedish.
  toonces344: bash.org ruined my life :(


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906938
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.628693
text:
  <rmalink> are you feeling any better?
  <dep01> no... not really..
  <rmalink> you know what it is?  allergies...
  <dep01> no, you know what it is?  the crippling depression..


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906938
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.628757
text:
  <Road> { private: long member; }
  <Road> but for me, that would be a long long
  <DAL9000> Road: you'd have to cast it to a char though.
  <Road> DAL9000: Hmm, that would cause an overflow
  <DAL9000> hah.
  <DAL9000> no big deal, i hear you always prematurely core dump
  anyway
  <Road> hahah, ouch
  <DAL9000> I COUNTER YOUR GEEK COUNTER WITH AN EVEN GEEKIER
  COUNTER.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906939
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.628856
text:
  <FreakingNeo> 20.  Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia is a
  fear of ____?
  <Qualjyn> long words
  <FreakingNeo> Winner: Qualjyn Answer: long words Time: 4.265
  Streak: 1 Points: 114 WPM: 28 Rank: 2nd
  <FreakingNeo> O_O


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906940
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.629051
text:
  <zilla1126> When I woke up this morning I had semen in my
  underwear.
  <nadervader22> ....
  <zilla1126> I'm concerned because it did not taste like mine.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906940
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.629106
text:
  <Dregneck> i dont find sperm perverted
  <Dregneck> at least my girlfriend doesnt
  <Dregneck> :)
  <Boro> :P
  <Dregneck> boro knows exactly what i mean lol
  <Dregneck> look at that tongue of him
  <Dregneck> :)
  * Boro looks aorund innocently


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906941
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.629166
text:
  <c0rnflake> what the fuck
  <c0rnflake> lol
  <c0rnflake> dude
  <c0rnflake> whats that one site to get your own ip?
  <c0rnflake> www.whatsmyip.com ?
  <madlib> www.dunno.com
  <travolta> c0rnflake: aol keyword: ip
  <c0rnflake> Im not on aol
  <c0rnflake> lol
  <travolta> you sure?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906941
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.629214
text:
  <FrAuStY|wirk> why is it.. condom only cover your dong? I
  mean.. your balls are steadily slapping some wet dripping
  poontang
  <Thordic> Your balls dont have a dirty juice entry point
  <C_Mayhem> if she bites they do....


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906941
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.629268
text:
  <Blowjob-Queen> Is she still internet dating him?
  <Fizzly> They were in the middle of a "harsh break up" last I
  remember.
  <Fizzly> Text was flying so fast.
  <Fizzly> Emoticons ran wild.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906942
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.629317
text:
  <Uber_DM> you know your bad when you are juggling with one
  hand, and typing with the other!
  <Vang> ...
  <Ming> heh
  <Vang> Please tell me that you are not juggling two balls...


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906942
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.629367
text:
  <Face> I worked at a compusa
  <Face> People go in their knowing nothing about computers, and
  get had.
  <AngryLlama> Face: any electronics store does this; I was in
  Best Buy yesterday and the guy actually felt the need to tell
  me "A megabyte is like a kilobyte, except really big"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906942
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.629424
text:
  David> Mexicans are some hardworking motherfuckers.
  David> This area LOVES mexicans.
  David> Because of all the farms and such around here.
  David> Particularly the mushroom farms.
  David> It's hard to find workers for such places
  David> But those fuckers could put together a house in a few
  hours if they'd never picked up a hammer before
  David> As opposed to white people
  David> Who would think about it for a few seconds
  David> Then call the contractor
  David> Who would assign a foreman
  David> Who would hire mexicans to do it


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906943
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.629482
text:
  <s_> well
  <s_> i have button and string shorts
  <troop> I'll bet
  <s_> and its hell to go to the bathroom
  <s_> so i just lift my short leg up
  <s_> and pee out the side
  <troop> lol


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906943
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.629535
text:
  <^10acious^> u live in germany and as such have an endless
  supply of porn
  <bvark> I actually bought a DVD called 'Granny cunts'
  yesterday
  <bvark> I give the best leaving presents
  <^10acious^> u have issues


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906943
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.629594
text:
  <rush> anyone ever notice that klingons speak unix?
  <rush> "Grep ls awk chmod"
  <rush> "Mknod ksh tar imap"
  <rush> "Wall fsck yacc"
  <assassin> dude. you even give geeks a bad name.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906943
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.629644
text:
  * inkedmn is BORED
  < jbm> inkedmn: drink beers. fuck wife.
  < inkedmn> jbm: no beer/money, wife's at work
  < jbm> uh. got any pets?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906944
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.629715
text:
  <zoweee> i'm holding out til the next election
  <zoweee> if it goes against us, i'll seriously begin looking
  for my cultural fire exits
  <zoweee> "There are exts at the front and the rear of american
  democracy. Please take this opportunity to familiarize
  yourself with the nearest exit. In the event of a theocratic
  american hegemony, lights will appear on either end of the
  aisle, marking the way to your exit for you."
  <zoweee> in the unlikely event of the repeal of Ammendments
  1-5, your seat cushion may be used to purchase carriage across
  one of our more porous borders
  <zoweee> should there be a  depressurization of america's
  historical tolerance for diversity, bibles will drop from the
  overhead compartment. please read your own copy before
  assisting small children
  <zoweee> please do not read pirated versions of the bible, as
  this may give aid and comfort to terrorist organizations
  <qBaz> zow: marry me immediately
  <zoweee> we thank you for flying Knee Jerk Republican Contract
  with America, and hope you'll enjoy your stay in 2003. Or
  wherever your final destination may be.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906944
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.629766
text:
  <@Twitch`> i should get "caution: filling is hot" tatooed on
  my ass
  <@Twitch`> i'd be just like a mcdonalds pie


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906944
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.629815
text:
  --> Kelle has joined #vendetta
  <StarFreeze> What goes up must come down. You're gonna run out
  of Viagra soon enough.
  <Kelle> I came in here at the WRONG time..


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906944
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.629869
text:
  <MerryXmouse> My mum and dad were just yelling at each other
  and I walked up and said "Can you two stop being wankers?" and
  my mum hit me on the head and goes "I'll wank you!...... No I
  won't..."


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906945
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.629919
text:
  <Turranius> Hate it when I wanna watch a movie, but dont wanna
  start it cause I need to pee and I'm too lazy to get up.
  <Turranius> Im thirsty too
  <Turranius> Hmm, I might be able to solve this after all.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906945
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.629978
text:
  <iTM> you can blame that on Power Archiver >:(
  <viro|umm> oh and I do
  <iTM> i started it up
  <iTM> and my comp froze
  <viro|umm> that's what it is supposed to do
  <iTM> oh yea?
  <viro|umm> yeah, set autocrash=0 in the ini file
  <viro|umm> by default it is 1


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906945
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.630032
text:
  <Infe> damn, i hate buying a computer part, you always see a
  better deal the next day
  <AlmtyBob> not me
  <ryo-ohki> Just steal stuff, and you won't have that problem.
  <Infe> but then they buy something newer and better to replace
  what you stole
  <Infe> and you have to steal again!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906946
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.630085
text:
  <b1u3> i hate those fat/ugly girls who go around wo bras like
  theyre playboy bunnies
  <b1u3> them: 'im secure with my body!' me: 'im not'


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906946
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.630134
text:
  <-yptosis> But Kazaa is telling me freecondoms.com is having a
  blow-out extravaganza...
  <-yptosis> That doesn't seem like it'd sell condoms very
  well... blow-outs are the last things I need...


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906946
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.630180
text:
  <Celery533> I have single handedly programmed applications
  which corporations have purchased from me.
  * LS * Maur prefers to type double-handedly :)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906946
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.630230
text:
  <gromky> I used to like to go to #deaf and ask if anyone was
  trading MP3's.
  <gromky> Still do, once in a while, for old times' sake.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906947
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.630277
text:
  Phil: dude
  Daryl: wut?
  Phil: I just found a pic of me when I was like 6, wearing a
  red mcdonalds hat with canadian ear flaps that says "mc kids"
  Phil: I want to punch myself in the face


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906947
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.630393
text:
  yetiamchosen: So the only part about this curse of recruiting
  potentials for the marine corps that isn't utterly miserable
  is fucking with the people that have already signed up. Now,
  we don't want to scare them off entirely, so we can't just sit
  there and be like, "You're going to die in bootcamp!" But we
  can be completely insane with each other in front of them, and
  let them draw that conclusion on their own. So we're told to
  take the poolees on a 1.5 mile run today. No staff nco's
  there, so we're like, "Fuckit. There's two recruits, there's
  eight of us ... four mile run." So we start running and I had
  just had a monster energy drink, the lo ball kind, which is
  red. That's a dumbass's recipe for disaster, but I really
  wanted one so I had one anyway. It dehydrates you, gives you
  cramps, and makes you puke. So we've been running like half a
  mile and without breaking pace I casually puke onto the side
  of the road, and keep running. Among marines this is normal
  behavior, so no one even says anything, but the recuruit is
  looking like, "Wtf, did that guy just puke without stopping?"
  geekryan: lol
  yetiamchosen: And he's like, "Dude! Are you alright!" I'm
  like, "KEEP RUNNING!" and I speed up a little bit, chuckling
  inside. And then it really hits me and I'm like, going full
  speed, just hurling all over the side of the road, wiping my
  mouth, running, hurling and he looks at the puke and he goes,
  "OH MY GOD ARE YOU PUKING BLOOD!"
  geekryan: HAHAHAHA
  yetiamchosen: And I go, "THAT'S NOT BLOOD IT'S CONFIDENCE
  AAAAGGGHHHHH!!!" And I just blast off like a little red
  streaming rocket ship. I look behind me and this kid seriously
  look like he's just about to piss his pants, like, "Oh my god,
  what the fuck have I gotten myself into?" I got up to the
  front and this marine looks at me and goes, "Were you really
  puking up blood?" I'm like, "No devil, it's monster," and he
  just laughs, he's like, "You're going to hell."
  yetiamchosen: That's it. I was chuckling inside all the way
  home.
  geekryan: that really is awesome
  geekryan: I can't imagine how freaked out that recruit was
  yetiamchosen: I hope he doesn't sleep well again until he gets
  to boot camp.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906947
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.630439
text:
  <just_shoot_me> you kno what the worst skool subject in the
  world is???
  <Star_Princess> just_shoot_me english?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906948
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.630495
text:
  <BobDole> i'm not the real bob dole
  <BobDole> but.. i'm just on this nick
  <T`karthon> ohh
  <Nija_work> had me fooled
  <T`karthon> thanks for clearing that up for us


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906948
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.630541
text:
  <Shuzin> Stupid junk e-mail.
  <Shuzin> Why would I want to get the porn OFF my PC when I
  bought all that film and went to all the trouble of hiding in
  the bushes?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906948
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.630644
text:
  * Calylinde straps on strap-on-dildo, dry humps up to chanserv
  <Calylinde> hahah
  <Calylinde> come on, channy
  <Calylinde> bend over!
  <Calylinde> gimmme the O!
  <Calylinde> Chanserv
  <Calylinde> you whore
  * ChanServ sets mode: +o Calylinde
  <@Calylinde> Hahahahahahah


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906949
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.630696
text:
  <LoneWolf_> Sexpo sucked ....
  <Gibbon> cool, I thought you'd only be able to look at stuff!
  <LoneWolf_> (in a bad way)
  <Gibbon> oh


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906949
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.630749
text:
  <rogers> hahah
  <guyen> roger: i love you man
  <guyen> and by "love" i mean that special "stab you in the
  face and shit down your throat" love
  <rogers> i love you too man


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906949
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.630805
text:
  * slippy drags you upstairs
  <ginge> !
  <slippy> to bed..
  <ginge> !!
  <slippy> to sleep!
  <ginge> :(
  <slippy> after a bit
  <ginge> ;)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906950
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.630863
text:
  <Supachikn> This transfer speed sucks man, what connection are
  you on? taken an hour and a half to transfer 1mb
  <ToadLicka> DSL, What Transfer?
  <Supachikn> This file I'm sending you.
  <Supachikn> FUCK, This file I'm sending THE WRONG PERSON
  <Heysoose> HAHAHAHAH, wasted an hour and half, fewl


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906950
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.630918
text:
  <refugee> Robbin: you think this is just a 'rag the dog'
  scenario?
  <vermifuge> refugee - you need to put this in terms she can
  understand
  <vermifuge> Robbin - do you think they are having a sale on
  fried fish, just to draw attention away from the fact that
  they ran out of chicken at popeyes?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906950
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.630976
text:
  <cagan> heh, my little sister bought vice city :)
  <spanky> such a cool game
  <cagan> i don't think my sister has any intention of
  completing it
  <cagan> she just likes driving around, and occasionally
  killing people
  <spanky> lol, dont we all?
  <cagan> she has cars in her garage ... and if they get damage,
  she carefully drives to a paint place, then keeps going in and
  out till its a colour she approves off
  <spanky> hehe


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906950
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.631030
text:
  <Moogboy> That Quotes page is retarted
  <Moogboy> Do you know how much of them are most likely
  completely fake?
  <WeslyC> I hear ya man
  <WeslyC> This is one of 'em.
  <Moogboy> O_o


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906951
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.631124
text:
  <Sys> What's *really* not funny is the nasty
  metal-on-oh-so-sensitive-metal sound my hard drive makes when
  I try and access anything in the last 2 gig.... oh dear....


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906951
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.631212
text:
  [scratchme] Cris, you ever smell moth balls before?
  [scratchme] ;)
  [PaC] scratchme: Smell is understatement. I've had them put in
  my mouth when I was younger.
  [scratchme] PaC, how did you get their little legs apart?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906952
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.631283
text:
  <Dane> i picked ryk up one night when he was completely
  trashed
  <Dane> and he was looking like spewing
  <Dane> so i reminded him of my car spew rule
  <Tippytoes> which is?
  <Dane> "if you hurl you pay me $150 and you have to clean it
  up"
  <KKKBitch> heh
  <Dane> and he looked in his pocket
  <Dane> and goes
  <Dane> "I can cover that"
  <Dane> "lets go get curry"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906952
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.631337
text:
  <RollOver> so whats the difference between dating and going
  out then?
  <Vindexus> Dating comes before going out, it isn't as serious.
  <Vindexus> THink of dating as Beta and going out as Release.
  <Vindexus> ....and that statement shows why I've never got to
  play the Alpha build.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906953
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.631434
text:
  <MooFoo> Fuse, get yourself a shock rifle, that shoots instant
  blue shit and slow moving blue shit
  <MooFoo> Also, if you manage to hit the slow moving blue shit
  with the instant blue shit, you will get an explosion of blue
  shit, that will turn the enemies into red shit
  <Fuse> That's a lot fo shit
  <MooFoo> fo real


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906953
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.631582
text:
  <Tetsuro> You have a blog?
  <Kat> dude
  <Kat> I'm an angsty suburbian teenager
  <Kat> and you're asking me if I have a WEBLOG?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906954
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.631644
text:
  <Eternal_S> Is this the irc-channel about the windows shell
  Litestep?
  <DeVante`> No...
  <DeVante`> This is where we, the homosexual IRC community, can
  come together without persecution from others.
  * Floach- slaps DeVante` around a bit with a large trout
  <DeVante`> Er..
  <DeVante`> I mean..
  <DeVante`> Yes...
  <DeVante`> Litestep shell.
  <DeVante`> That's us!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906954
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.631695
text:
  <dx-trin> i just want to go to CPL to make a movie of all the
  uglyest people ever
  <Rival|Inq> "gamers gone ugly"
  <Rival|Inq< "uncensored"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906954
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.631736
text:
  CreeDi: I made a joke to this chick about how she was grumpy
  because she was
  beaten a lot as a child, and it turns out she really was.
  CreeDi: I felt about as big as a keebler elf testicle.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906955
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.631789
text:
  <Queued> It must be late -- "perl5" is looking like "penis"
  <Boinger69> Stay up until "VB" looks like "a good idea"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906955
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.631882
text:
  <oliciv> Roses are red,
  <oliciv> violets are blue,
  <oliciv> badger badger badger,
  <oliciv> badger badger mushroom


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906957
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.631934
text:
  <DF> Does anybody here live in a dorm ? That would be so cool
  living right near your mates 24/7
  <Cav> i boarded for year 12
  <Cav> it was interesting but a pain in the arse
  <Cav> err
  <Cav> i better change that reply :)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906957
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.632002
text:
  <vaguepant> Woooooooow.
  <vaguepant> This woman is immensely full of shit.
  <vaguepant> "The damage that can be done to children by seeing
  a woman's breast in public is not that far off from the damage
  that can be done ...
  <vaguepant> "to children who engage in sexual activities with
  adults."
  <Wikidan829> oh no!! not titties!!
  <Wikidan829> that's absolutely insane
  <EdBoy> vaguepant: what the FUCK?
  <vaguepant> If the damage is that minor, I'm gonna start
  fucking kids right now


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906957
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.632059
text:
  <Slyder> I think i found what i am going to buy
  <Slyder> http://www.futureshop.ca/catalog/proddetail.asp?sku_id=
  0665000FS10006972&
  catid=10220&logon=&langid=EN&dept=1&WLBS=fsweb6&MSCSProfile=
  04F5E73718534B93F3C511
  B6289DBD5550C54405B2BE30A52CB53ABFF8716E7FE52D9C5C57B21A5894C6A6E05467561C22530DBF

  981DF35CB5F364A5C835B6B7135EA94E78B9705B401CC5D977D837F3C134AC33E90B98115492CDA152

  3C33E076FB2030322CB217386F89CB622647687BDD9F8FE7C5E5FF
  <Slyder> thoughts?
  <Hadaken> Get a shorter URL


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906957
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.632112
text:
  « Mo0ze » ye u better not be sucking on your own penis again
  «@ young_einstein» i tried but im not flexible enough
  <CrashMan79> Mwa ha ha ha ha ha.....
  «@ Octalus» I wish i could suck my own penis
  <CrashMan79> I don't
  <CrashMan79> who knows where it's been


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906958
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.632174
text:
  <Astrakhan> What determines the silica content?
  <J>The silicon content in the sand/soil/rocks around it XP
  <Astrakhan>Ah. XD
  <J> technically silica is silicon. only smaller pieces
  <Astrakhan> So, if I steal Pamela's implants, put sand in
  them, and expose them to fire, I can get breast shaped glass?
  <J>no no no. SILICON. not silicone
  <J> Difference
  <Astrakhan> Oh.
  <J>XP


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906958
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.632223
text:
  <AAA> Singapore is believed to have the highest prevalence of
  myopia in the world; up to 80% of people there have myopia
  <AAA> yikes
  <BBB> i bet they never seen it coming


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906958
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.632281
text:
  <BustaNutt> I was working in a movie theatre one time and a
  mother just threw her crying baby on the hard ground, i was
  like WTF!! the other ushers had to calm me down coz i was
  fuckin pissed the rest of the day
  <Abstruse> Busta: I almost had to call the cops on this one
  woman when I was working in the bookstore because her child
  calmly walked up and quietly asked 'Momma, can I have this
  book?" and she smacked the SHIT out of him.  I told her to get
  out, and she threw a fit.
  <BustaNutt> ABstruse, she beat the kid just for asking for a
  book?
  <Abstruse> That's not even the most fucked up part.  The most
  fucked up part is that she worked for a shelter for battered
  women and children.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906959
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.632359
text:
  <ThisIsASentenceInANick> Saber, just imagine yourself being
  gangbanged by moths.  This is what will happen to you if you
  don't behave.
  <Saber> what
  <Saber> I didn't do anything
  <Saber> and I have a bat
  <Saber> I'll fight them off
  <ThisIsASentenceInANick> That's not going to help a lot.
  <ThisIsASentenceInANick> Can't you just feel their tiny cocks
  writhing against your skin, Saber?
  <ThisIsASentenceInANick> Just straining to reach an orifice?
  <ThisIsASentenceInANick> Do you like it?
  <ThisIsASentenceInANick> Does it feel good?
  <Saber> That's bizarre to the point that it doesn't affect me


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906959
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.632452
text:
  * Finn apologises for her rabbit like activity
  <Finn> that could be read a few ways..I mean jumping about


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906959
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.632503
text:
  <The_Slog> you know how a sink trap works?
  <Einer> No.
  <Einer> I'm a rocket scientist, not a plumber.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906960
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.632550
text:
  <Dabz> I'm currently sat outside in the garden on a laptop, in
  85 degree heat, in the shade, with a cold beer.   If I lost
  the laptop I could almost pass as a normal person


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906960
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.632610
text:
  < terminus> I'm not the "i am 37173, give me warez!" type
  though lathiat
  <@Lathiat> anyway bbl
  < terminus> Oops I spelt elite wrong, I don't know leet-speak
  well enough
  < terminus> 37337 I meant
  <@Lathiat> u mean 31337
  < terminus> Sorry I blew my cover now you know I'm not really
  elite


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906960
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.632661
text:
  <@sxh> anyone got links to the nick berg vid?
  <@D1> nick berg is hilarious.
  <@D1> whats the video about?
  <@D1> oh wait, thats nick cannon


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906960
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.632706
text:
  TTim2627: i try to restrain from illegal activities on sundays
  igcatastrophe:really? I don't. i figure, gods resting, get him
  in his blindspot
  TTim2627: africa?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906961
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.632761
text:
  <Uday_Williams> Know what'd be messed up?  If one of Saddam's
  doubles turned good, and then was appointed to run the
  country.  Bet that'd confuse alot of people.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906961
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.632855
text:
  (trich): man, I'm bored
  (slippy^): this is accepted already by the fact you're on irc
  (slippy^): mind when i do something interesting i tend to come
  on irc to tell everybody


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906962
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.632951
text:
  <USMarine> if someone +v's me, how do I talk?
  <USMarine> i have the mic plugged in obviously
  <USMarine> do i have to push a button or something


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906962
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.632997
text:
  <#seattle/ThisGirl> SONOFABITCH
  <#seattle/ThisGirl> i hate it when ppl ask me if im male or
  female


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906963
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.633096
text:
  <SWM> i hate your fucking pancakes
  <SWM> i never eat them
  <SWM> "FUCK YOU EAT MY FUCKING PANCAKES"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906963
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.633159
text:
  <Threeboy> don't use it ever when i'm in here please.
  <_3D_Mike|work> use what?
  <_3D_Mike|work> whigger?
  <Threeboy> "nigger" it's fucking rascist.
  <JonM> I am not racisct
  <JonM> it was easier to type then african american


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906963
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.633218
text:
  <Blazen> racism is not tolerated on this network. you have
  been warned. further actions will include kill/gline.
  <gigfood> who is that
  <gigfood> everybody says that word
  <gigfood> fuck you nigger
  <Zt|ReEn^Ni> hes an ircop
  <gigfood> shit he is?
  <Blazen> is that a challenge?
  <gigfood> listen here mr tuff irc cop
  <gigfood> fuck you nigger
  *** gigfood has quit IRC (G-lined (Multiple harassment/racism
  issues))


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906963
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.633277
text:
  <Duck> Gullible isn't in the dictionary
  <Fred> Yeah it is dumbass.
  <Fred> gul li ble - adj. ( P )  Pronunciation Key  (gl-bl)
  <Fred> Easily deceived or duped.
  <Fred> ...
  <Fred> god dammit...
  <Duck> lol


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906964
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.633318
text:
  (Proalpha): SOMEONE BEEN HACKING MY FUCKING COMP WHO IS IT!, I
  WILL FIND YOU I GOT YOU ADDRESS FUCKER. [AMSG]
  (Proalpha): HELP ME OUT, HIS IP IS 216.226.129.209
  *** Looking up 216.226.129.209
  *** Resolved 216.226.129.209 to
  security-scanner.progameplayer.com


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906964
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.633423
text:
  <TMH_> does anyone else find that they are in a fuckton of
  channels
  <TMH_> and they only actually care about two or three
  <jmx> define a fuckton?
  <Thuryn> ten times a buttload
  <LPF> that's a metric fuckton


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906965
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.633515
text:
  <Apollo-> I would pay for one of you guys to come slob my knob
  though ;)
  * Uncouth perks.
  <Uncouth> Apollo-: how much?
  <Apollo-> Uncouth: $1 per minute, $1 penalty per minute after
  the first minute ;)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906965
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.633574
text:
  <enex> MadHatter: eat shit!
  <MadHatter> what
  <MadHatter> fuck you
  <enex> oh
  <enex> hi
  <MadHatter> yeah hey
  <enex> what's up
  <MadHatter> nothing man


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906965
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.633626
text:
  <FGDH> holy fuck, i was talking to this girl i like and we
  were flirting ..
  <ToG> And...
  <FGDH> then she said.."Tell your trousers to stop pointing at
  me".. FUCK


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906966
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.633681
text:
  <kow> anyone know where active desktop info is stored in
  win2k?
  <kow> like the HTML files
  <APE_> same place bill gates hides the porn in win2k
  <kow> fuck
  <kow> I'm not gonna find it right?
  <APE_> theres 200mb worth of porn built into windows, i mean
  how do u think it got that large?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906966
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.633732
text:
  <AndrewB> I've played the Expansion Pack for about an hour and
  a half, and I'm already boAGH GET AWAY FROM ME YOU MOTH


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906966
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.633787
text:
  <pagan> dude youll be talking about that still when were 60
  years old
  <jstepka-w> i know
  <jstepka-w> because it's the triumph of my life
  <jstepka-w> two bitches at once
  <jstepka-w> and i didn't pay


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906966
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.633840
text:
  <mark_007> i was peeing before and i hear this shuffling
  outside the door, so i lift my leg and kick the door as hard
  as i can
  <mark_007> and like i hear this bump, and an "OWW", so i
  really quickly finish up and open the door
  <mark_007> my little brother's lying on the ground holding his
  head and writhing in pain
  <mark_007> HE WAS LISTENING TO ME PEEING


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906967
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.633891
text:
  <tmb^work> even c64 can connect to the internet
  <tmb^work> irc + web
  <tmb^work> what do you need more?
  <garg^work> porn :D
  <triple> Porn.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906967
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.633946
text:
  <Jeffrey> So I started work today at Cox Communications.
  <Jeffrey> Direct quote from Cox Communications, mission
  statement.
  <Jeffrey> "For Cox, it's not about being the biggest; it's
  about being the best."
  <Vann> ...I feel a t-shirt coming on.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906967
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.633999
text:
  <vocalizedWHORE> mmm, c++
  <vocalizedWHORE> do.this();
  <vocalizedWHORE> do.that();
  <vocalizedWHORE> if (error)
  <vocalizedWHORE> blame(microsoft);


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906968
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.634052
text:
  <PuchikoChan> it's like the least spoken strand of jewish
  language
  <PuchikoChan> like some kinda porno movie
  <PuchikoChan> eerrr, disregard that last comment
  <SkyLancer> err
  * js8|finals wonders how tera went from linguistics to porn in
  one sentence


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906968
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.634163
text:
  <NeonMorning> I'm so bored I've resorted to entering a general
  teen chat channel.
  <NeonMorning> [02:22:48] <viju> hi girls i am a young male boy
  who loves to have a peep under the dresses of girls like you
  or ladies or even housewives. i want to go under the skirts
  dresses or sarees of all u young n beautiful ladies. i just
  like  to play there and lick all that is avilable down under.
  Will u allow me under?  i Know u want me under   ;)
  <NeonMorning> English isn't his thing, apparrently.
  <Urban_Hermit> he seems to be facinated with Australia...
  <NeonMorning> He loves "all that is available in the down
  under."
  <Urban_Hermit> kangaroos... wombats... koalas....


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906968
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.634211
text:
  <Merlin> Good news, in case you were worried that Rodney King
  was done entertaining us, he got drunk and plowed his SUV into
  a house at 100 mph
  <sComps> christ.. dead?
  <Merlin> yes, Christ is dead, but thats 2,000 year old news.
  King just has a broken pelvis


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906969
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.634261
text:
  <FooMashoo> i wear my pants backwards <Bryan> is that so the
  zipper is easier for your lover? <FooMashoo> yes


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906969
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.634315
text:
  <bonch> You should write some Full House fan fiction
  <Nastard> "...but little did Uncle Jesse expect to find Joey
  standing alone in his room, surrounded by candles, pleasuring
  himself.  He stood aghast for a moment, watching the tears
  stream from Joey's closed eyes.  The soft music started to get
  to him, and he found his hand rubbing against the crotch of
  his pants, bringing 'little Elvis' alive for a rousing
  crescendo of his own..."


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906969
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.634369
text:
  <duckman> do you say gash?
  <A|exander> not in polite company
  <IonSurge> haha
  <IonSurge> who here is polite company?
  <A|exander> oops typo
  <A|exander> meant police custody


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906970
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.634411
text:
  Kid1: What are you, illiterate?
  Teacher: Hey, we dont talk about illiterate people.
  Kid2: Yea, we write about them.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906970
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.634470
text:
  <indecisive> I WISH I WAS LIKE 5
  <indecisive> I COULD START ALL OVER
  <indecisive> LIKE HEY, I COULD PRETEND TO NOT BE ABLE TO MOVE
  MY LEGS
  <indecisive> AND WENT AROUND IN A WHEELCHAIR LIKE ALL MY LIFE
  BUT EXERCISED MY LEGS SECRETLY AND THEN JUMPED OUT AND STARTED
  BREAK-DANCING
  <Fishfood> YOU COULD GO TO A CRIPPLE CONVENTION AND GET UP IN
  THE MIDDLE AND SHOUT 'GET WITH THE FUNK' AND JUMP ON THE TABLE
  <indecisive> WHILE I'M WISHING, I WISH I HAD FIVE THOUSAND
  DOLLARS


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906970
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.634521
text:
  <FlipTopBox> Concatenate?
  <mightyflo> its something sexual
  <FlipTopBox> Concatenate can be sexual, baby.
  <mightyflo> its something sexual to someone who hasn't taken a
  programming class


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906970
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.634562
text:
  OriginalEmoo: haha someone lost her bronze medal for cyling
  cuz she failed doping test
  OriginalEmoo: god damn if i end up taking drugs to perform
  better i am not getting my ass kicked by 2 people who didnt


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906971
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.634651
text:
  * terra melts JDigital
  * JDigital melts
  * JDigital respawns, and is quickly telefragged by a newbie


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906971
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.634694
text:
  (@nd): i should find a hobby
  (@nd): other than drinking
  (@rawby): put your beer in the freezer
  (@rawby): then take up licking


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906972
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.634802
text:
  [9:43:pm] <beau> man, i have so much respect for anyone that
  designs adult web sites
  [9:43:pm] <GodTheMod> its harder than it looks
  [9:43:pm] <xie> Hahahahaha
  [9:43:pm] <beau> i've been sorting through material for my
  site, and i can't help but get a hard on, and that means much
  less blood in my head.. i JUST CANT WORK LIKE THAT!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906972
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.634849
text:
  <FrostyNerv> when building a pc whats the name of that anti
  static wrist band thing?
  <Darkcyde> an anti-static wristband?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906972
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.634912
text:
  <Poyzin> So, something amusing happened to me.
  <Kilts> ?
  <Poyzin> I clocked out of work today, and the ticket tells me
  I've worked 13 hours and 37 minutes.
  <Poyzin> Of course, presented as 13.37.
  <Poyzin> Know what that makes me? :D
  <Kilts> lol really leet?
  <Poyzin> ...
  <Poyzin> I worked 13 and a half fucking hours, and TIRED isn't
  your first guess? God dammit.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906973
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.634965
text:
  <Pinkel> http://www.google.nl/search?q=%22go+to+hell%22&ie=
  UTF-8&oe=UTF-8
  <Pinkel> Check the first hit, it fits so good...
  <deTwisj> So true...

  -- first hit: Microsoft Corporation -- Where Do You Want to Go
  Today? --


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906973
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.635013
text:
  <-MIKE-> fuck i downloaded the movie but no sound or picture
  <Patrick> that sucks.. so what the fuck did u download??
  internet air?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906973
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.635066
text:
  <MrMonkey> an aura is the spirit that surrounds all of bodies
  <MrMonkey> healers use it
  <MrMonkey> they claim they can see how strong or weak one's
  aura is
  <BlurNM> thought it was something like that (if it wasn't the
  northern lights)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906974
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.635116
text:
  <Trak3r> hmm, qdb has new rules
  <Trak3r> SUBMISSION RULES:
  <Trak3r> 3) PLEASE THINK ABOUT THE QUOTE YOU ARE SUBMITTING,
  IS IT FUNNY? PLEASE DO NOT SUBMIT QUOTES WITHOUT ANY MEANING
  OR HUMOR
  <Trak3r> that third one pretty much eliminates their database
  thus far


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906974
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.635176
text:
  Chargon[HorsebackArchery] is now known as Sir_Chargon
  <Eric> Horseback Archery.
  <Eric> D00d, drive-by shooting. It's a sign of the times.
  <Kataclysm> Yes, but  a ride-by shooting just doesn't have the
  same effect as a drive-by.
  <Eric> Good point. ANYONE can kill a horse, but a car doesn't
  stagger when it's down.
  <Kataclysm> That, and horses don't have tinted power windows
  either.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906974
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.635233
text:
  <fireslide> i turned the windows narrator on
  <fireslide> it funny as hell :)
  <Tolkien`> what does it do?
  <fireslide> it narrates stuff man
  <Tolkien`> like the text on the screen?
  <fireslide> yes
  <Tolkien`> is it for deaf people
  <Tolkien`> or something?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906974
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.635281
text:
  [+BaByGiRL]: A woman enroled in nursing school is attending an
  anatomy class. The subject of the day is involuntary muscles.
  The instructor, hoping to perk up the students a bit, asks the
  woman if she knows what her asshole does when she has an
  orgasm.
  [+BaByGiRL]: "Sure!" she says, "He's at home taking care of
  the kids..."


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906975
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.635338
text:
  * @Pretsel wants a little robot which will clean floors and
  vacumn rooms :/
  <Mad-Cow> You can get them
  <@Pretsel> Yeah but I'd imagine they'd be expensive :D
  <Mad-Cow> It'll cost you a few million but you can get em
  <@Pretsel> Woah Woah... I don't want a wife...


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906975
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.635383
text:
  <CoryS> You know it's a bad sign when you call ISP support to
  change some dns servers around and they ask if the ip address
  you just gave them was a phone number or IP address.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906975
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.635489
text:
  <rdragon> command.com was the filename of the shell in dos
  <ih8uungr8> oh i see its on the internet
  <@PMP> What does the internet have to do with any of this?
  <ih8uungr8> for www.command.com
  <rdragon> *slaps his forehead*
  <@PMP> Oh god
  <ih8uungr8> how do you type
  <ih8uungr8> i tried making it fullscreen but that doesnt work


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906976
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.635543
text:
  tom: why do girls get grossed out when you say you've tried to
  suck your own dick?
  Kanddak: lol
  Kanddak: are you saying you've tried to suck your own dick
  tom: today in journalism these girls tied my shoelaces
  together
  tom: so I bend down to untie them
  tom: and she pushes my head down
  tom: and I'm like "believe me, I've tried about a million
  times, it's not going to work"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906976
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.635594
text:
  <Cuban Atlas> See, Zeir, FD is smart..He ops himself the
  moment he enters
  <FD> This way I can abuse the power faster
  <Polo> That's the American way
  <FD> Damn right


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906977
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.635696
text:
  <Mithrandir> http://www.geekissues.org/quotes/?12572
  - did you know that it is anatomically impossible to lick your
  elbow...and 75% of the people who hear that actually try to
  lick their elbow?
  <SirPrux> already read that
  <SirPrux> it's not funny
  <Mithrandir> did you try?
  <SirPrux> Yeah


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906977
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.635743
text:
  <fo0bar> why the hell is tivo recording cnn?  I told it I
  wanted first-run wars ONLY
  <fo0bar> this is obviously a repeat


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906977
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.635787
text:
  <MetalWyrm> every 2 minutes I wil post random quotes from
  bash.org because I am a complete and total asshole


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906978
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.635883
text:
  Jigglyjuff: that's worse then that peanut, butter and jelly
  sandwich i hear all americans like
  <CHAT MattDavis>  no
  <CHAT MattDavis>  peanut butter
  Jigglyjuff: oh! that makes much more sense


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906978
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.635979
text:
  <cainispissyill> YES YES YES YES YES YES YES
  <cainispissyill> GOOOOO MATH!
  <cainispissyill> GOOOOO STATISTICS!
  <badtz-maru> GOOOOOOOOOOO AWAY


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906979
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.636068
text:
  -ChanServ- Welcome to #Dynasty. Please note that these
  services have full help files and a quick /msg *Serv HELP (IE.
  /msg ChanServ HELP) will give you a complete listing. Please
  do not use any scripts in this channel. This includes but is
  not limited to, mp3 and system status scripts.
  * Nice_Ghuy (~_________@202.155.106.DynastyNet-64857) has
  joined #Dynasty
  <Nice_Ghuy> /msg *Serv HELP
  * Nice_Ghuy (~_________@202.155.106.DynastyNet-64857) has left
  #Dynasty


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906980
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.636163
text:
  [illz] i could maybe play it off him like 'im just taking my
  autistic friend out he's never had a drink before'


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906980
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.636218
text:
  <Loc-Dog> which is probably a good indication that he likes
  gaynal sex
  <SantaClaws> i'll stick with the bitches part, thanks
  <Loc-Dog> SantaClaws: sweet! ahmed's ass was getting loose
  anyway
  <Loc-Dog> a: you no longer have to play the bitches part....
  SantaClaws volunteered
  *** SantaClaws curses not thinking before he speaks


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906980
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.636270
text:
  <prower> check out what i put on e-bay
  <tom_> oh god
  <tom_> are you trying to sell your sister again
  <tom_> i keep telling you its illegal


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906980
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.636316
text:
  *** Keyser is now known as Keyser|driveby
  <Keyser|driveby> brb
  <Keyser|driveby> crawling on floor for a while :\


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906982
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.636393
text:
  <@Social> mathcore is DEP
  <@Social> and mr gayngle
  <@Phil> "AHHHHHH ONE PLUS TWO EQUALS THREE I HATE YOUR MOM
  AHHHHHHHH ::fast guitars::"
  <@Phil> oh
  <@Phil> i thought it was hardcore with mathematical lyrics
  <@Social> lol
  <@Social> LOL
  <@Social> oh man
  <@Social> that made me laugh
  <@Social> AHAHA
  <@Social> that would be great
  <@Phil> i was being serious
  <@Social> like
  <@Phil> i would be a pioneer of that genre
  <@Social> "AH 2 TIMES FUCKING 3 EQUALS 6 DIVIDED BY THE SQUARE
  ROOT OF YOUR MOTHER'S LOVE!!!!! FUCK!!!!"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906982
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.636443
text:
  <tokage> i have emotional states: apathy and irritation, which
  would you like me to direct at you?
  ? tokage/#kuro5hin smirks
  <ragabr> tokage: irritation if it leads to spankings and
  nipple clamps
  <vsync> which one comes with a free beer?
  <tokage> hmm..both probably


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906982
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.636487
text:
  <Vada> is it bad when you are at work and someone that is
  being rude says something to you and you all of a sudden see
  YOU FRAGGED SOANDSO about their head?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906983
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.636531
text:
  (oxie) i want a dog
  (+AlsoMike) why do you want a dog?
  (oxie) dogs are cool
  (+AlsoMike) but do you want a hairy, sometimes smelly friend
  who bums all his food and accomodation off you and defecates
  on your bedroom floor?
  (oxie) yes ;)
  (+AlsoMike) i'll move in tomorrow.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906983
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.636572
text:
  * Quasar` waves a fist at irc.concentric.net
  *** Quasar` has quit IRC (irc.exodus.net *.concentric.net)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906983
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.636613
text:
  [Cask] |
  [Cask] |= - - - - - - - - - - - - *|
  [Cask] |= - - - - - - - - - - - - */
  [Cask] |= - - - - - - - - - - - - *__
  [Cask] I= ^|^
  [Cask] erp
  [Cask] I find it difficult to express myself accurately in irc


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906984
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.636670
text:
  <cirrhosis> GODDAMN IT TO FUCKING HELL
  <cirrhosis> WTF....MAN, I OUGHTTA JUST GO FUCKING SHOOT MYSELF
  <cirrhosis> jesus fucking christ
  <dolph72> ?
  <cirrhosis> wife just told me she's prego
  <dolph72> Dont shoot yourself
  <dolph72> Shoot the asshole that did it


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906984
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.636741
text:
  <@Daedalus> I think any "how to" thing that starts "so you've"
  is solid gold
  <@Daedalus> "So you've decided open a hockey rink"
  <@Synergistic> Thats weird
  <@Daedalus> "So you've decided to mail a kitten"
  <@Daedalus> "So you've got cancer"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906985
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.636898
text:
  <Ancalag0n> yes i just used residents as a verb
  <dragonbyt> i hate fskcing dialup
  <Ancalag0n> dialups gay
  <Akki> how about "resides on"
  <Ancalag0n> u should get aol
  <Ancalag0n> akki:nope
  <mikephoen> what the hell, did they install irc at the retard
  house :/


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906985
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.636945
text:
  Eli:  Today this black kid who acts pretty white was trying to
  convince me that hes asian cus hes a ninja
  Eli: I said
  Eli: "ninja please"
  Eli: It was awesome.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906986
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.637038
text:
  <Jedi-Ohki> yah, and im a newbie because i've been a. using
  mirc since...1998 b. been using the internet since...1995, or
  c. all of the above.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906986
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.637085
text:
  Wardave: My girlfriend tells me I'm lazy and have no ambition.
  CancersDan: Dump her ass
  Wardave: I should but that's just way too much work


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906987
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.637224
text:
  <Amira_nu> hey nothing wrong with loving G-d both ways
  <Melech> loving god both ways sounds rather kinky


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906987
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.637324
text:
  <Jessica6> I may not be good at languages but I'm a lot better
  at maths than you two! :P
  <Jessica6> Er....I mean 'you three'


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906987
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.637380
text:
  <astynax> i'm gonna install icq and look for some hoez
  <deformated> hoez dont even know what irc is
  <deformated> only in other countries do females use it
  <astynax> ICQ, not IRC
  <deformated> ahh it might help if i read things
  <astynax> i heard it helps


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906988
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.637436
text:
  * Wang feasts on elbow macaroni and baby carrots
  <slm> good for you, you have the diet of a 3 year old
  <Wang> woo
  <Wang> and i'm hung like one too
  <Wang> ...
  <slm> uhhhh... congrats?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906988
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.637482
text:
  ::: .signoff@2.59p> Townshend
  (wang@cb31185-c.rmdws1.il.home.com); Geek used to be a
  4-letter word; now it's a 6-figure one.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906988
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.637595
text:
  Impure Mathematics
  ------ -----------
  To prove once and for all that math can be fun, we
  present: Wherein it is related how that paragon of womanly
  virtue, young Polly Nomial (our heroine) is accosted by that
  notorious villain Curly Pi, and factored (oh horror!!!)
  Once upon a time (1/t) pretty little Polly Nomial was
  strolling across a field of vectors when she came to the
  boundary
  of a singularly large matrix. Now Polly was convergent, and
  her
  mother had made it an absolute condition that she must never
  enter such an array without her brackets on. Polly, however,
  who had changed her variables that morning and was feeling
  particularly badly behaved, ignored this condition on the
  basis
  that it was insufficient and made her way in amongst the
  complex
  elements. Rows and columns closed in on her from all sides.
  Tangents approached her surface. She became tensor and tensor.
  Quite suddendly two branches of a hyperbola touched her at a
  single point. She oscillated violently, lost all sense of
  directrix, and went completely divergent. As she tripped over
  a
  square root that was protruding from the erf and plunged
  headlong down a steep gradient. When she rounded off once
  more,
  she found herself inverted, apparently alone, in a
  non-Euclidean
  space.
  She was being watched, however. That smooth operator,
  Curly Pi, was lurking inner product. As his eyes devoured her
  curvilinear coordinates, a singular expression crossed his
  face.
  He wondered, "Was she still convergent?" He decided to
  integrate properly at once.
  Hearing a common fraction behind her, Polly rotated and
  saw Curly Pi approaching with his power series extrapolated.
  She could see at once by his degenerate conic and dissipative
  that he was bent on no good.
  "Arcsinh," she gasped.
  "Ho, ho," he said, "What a symmetric little asymptote
  you have I can see you angles have lots of secs."
  "Oh sir," she protested, "keep away from me I haven't
  got my brackets on."
  "Calm yourself, my dear," said our suave operator, "your
  fears are purely imaginary."
  "I, I," she thought, "perhaps he's not normal but
  homologous."
  "What order are you?" the brute demanded.
  "Seventeen," replied Polly.
  Curly leered "I suppose you've never been operated on."
  "Of course not," Polly replied quite properly, "I'm
  absolutely convergent."
  "Come, come," said Curly, "let's off to a decimal place
  I know and I'll take you to the limit."
  "Never," gasped Polly.
  "Abscissa," he swore, using the vilest oath he knew.
  His patience was gone. Coshing her over the coefficient with a
  log until she was powerless, Curly removed her
  discontinuities.
  He stared at her significant places, and began smoothing out
  her
  points of inflection. Poor Polly. The algorithmic method was
  now her only hope. She felt his digits tending to her
  asymptotic
  limit. Her convergence would soon be gone forever.
  There was no mercy, for Curly was a heavyside operator.
  Curly's radius squared itself; Polly's loci quivered. He
  integrated by parts. He integrated by partial fractions. After
  he cofactored, he performed runge - kutta on her. The complex
  beast even went all the way around and did a contour
  integration. What an indignity - to be multiply connected on
  her first integration. Curly went on operating until he
  completely satisfied her hypothesis, then he exponentiated and
  became completely orthogonal.
  When Polly got home that night, her mother noticed that
  she was no longer piecewise continuous, but had been truncated
  in several places But it was to late to differentiate now. As
  the months went by, Polly's denominator increased
  monotonically.
  Finally she went to L'Hopital and generated a small but
  pathological function which left surds all over the place and
  drove Polly to deviation.
  The moral of our sad story is this: "If you want to
  keep your expressions convergent, never allow them a single
  degree of freedom."


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906988
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.637642
text:
  <chin> i got a solution, lets shoot homeless at the missles
  <chin> that way the system pays for itself


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906989
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.637704
text:
  <PA_stoned> for once i wasn't thinking about sex
  <PA_stoned> lookit that, i guess being stoned does not
  necessarily make me horny!
  <DS_lonely> *gasp* and i bet your not stoned.
  <PA_stoned> yes i am!
  <DS_lonely> WHAT!
  <PA_stoned> why else would i be eating pussy with my finger?

  <PA_stoned> oops!
  <DS_lonely> noice!
  <PA_stoned> i meant puddding


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906989
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.637761
text:
  <Embercide> lol i just tried to RP for the first time
  <Embercide> some guy was like "greetings" so i said "hail"
  <Embercide> he asked "how art thee"
  <Embercide> and i didnt know wtf to say so i made it look like
  i logged out


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906989
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.637809
text:
  (@Sin-away): have to ask Night about Trigger^
  (@Sin-away): he doesn't talk
  (@Archon`): how come he doesnt say anything?
  (@fragge): dunno he's never told me


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906990
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.637866
text:
  <digdug> i think i've come up with a solution to my problem
  <digdug> i'll just put each [previously misconfigured NT] box
  into its own domain
  <digdug> mwuahahahah
  <h2odragon> digdug: you are in Hell; all you can do is push
  the rock up a different wall for a while
  <h2odragon> it's still going to roll back down


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906990
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.637907
text:
  harm|work: there was a fucking insect on my monitor
  harm|work: and i saw it and i was like fuck im gonna squelch
  it
  harm|work: and i pointed
  harm|work: and double clicked
  harm|work: i mustve missed cause it flew away :(


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906990
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.637996
text:
  <RandalCalrissian> Who wrote an essay entitled 'Advice to a
  Young Man on choosing a Mistress'?
  <Jeegoo> Cassanova
  <RandalCalrissian> Here's your 1st hint, B___am__ ____k___
  <Jeegoo> no idea
  <Randal> dr seus
  <Jeegoo> hee
  <Zwuh> Al Gore
  <RandalCalrissian> Here's your 2nd hint, _en_a_in _r_n__i_
  <RandalCalrissian> Here's your 3rd hint, B_njami_ Fra__lin
  <Zwuh> Benjamin Frankin
  <Jeegoo> Benjamn franklin
  <Randal> benjamin frankls
  <Randal> oop
  <Randal> s
  <Zwuh> haha
  <RandalCalrissian> Time's up! The answer was: Benjamin
  Franklin
  <Zwuh> way to spell, team!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906990
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.638046
text:
  <RogueFoxx> I'm going to go outside
  <RogueFoxx> where no nerd has gone before
  <RogueFoxx> pray for me


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906991
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.638102
text:
  <Owyn> I can't double click on a folder to open it.
  <Owyn> THat's not a good thing.
  <Phuser> keep the chat running man JUST KEEP THE CHAT RUNNING!
  *** Owyn has quit IRC (Read error: Connection reset by peer)
  <Phuser> damn
  * Phuser throws his hands in the air
  <Phuser> WHY GOD, WHY?!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906991
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.638149
text:
  <tom_> i heard that if you walk into a fridge and close the
  door you cant get out again
  <tom_> im sure if i got stuck in a fridge i could get out
  <tom_> im gonna fuckin try it


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906991
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.638203
text:
  <torrez> it's always weird when i meet racist geeks
  <torrez> we had a sysadmin who used to let his anti-black
  feelings pop out all the time.
  <Gopher> perhaps it's a natural outgrowth of coping with years
  of anti-geek abuse
  <Ryland> nah, I think he was probably just a run-of-the-mill
  asshole.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906992
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.638255
text:
  <PetTeacher> If you could fight any celebrity who would it be?
  <C0pp4F33l> michael flatly
  <Protegemoi> ugh... Paris Hilton definitely
  <Exostetic> Stephen Hawking.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906992
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.638301
text:
  <[VsE]GaZ> Oh fucken somethign smeels good Brb
  <[VsE]GaZ> Oh dammn it was my cat did a shit under the couch


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906992
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.638401
text:
  <tweekie> omglife!
  * tweekie promptly dies
  <Davidious> Oooooo
  <Davidious> Hey babes
  <tweekie> no necrophilia play tonight, i'm too tired
  * Davidious sighs
  * Davidious Quit (Connection reset by peer)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906993
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.638449
text:
  <l0wkey> i am in a jam...it is my old roommates 21st birthday
  tonight, no school tomorrow, a few movies i want to see,
  Simpsons and X-Files...what to do?
  <l0wkey> I KNOW...STAY ON IRC


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906993
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.638498
text:
  * bitch has joined #lobby
  <bitch> hey
  <son_of_evil> hi *****
  <Nehaal> hi *****
  <Falkner|AWAY> hi *****


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906993
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.638548
text:
  <BoltBait> My wife saw my 7756 post count on the MOTL board
  and said, "you've never said that many things to me since
  we've been married."


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906994
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.638645
text:
  <Floach> It's pretty well known that your brain continues to
  function for quite a bit after decapitation
  <Bitstorm> the mame board is proof of that


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906994
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.638697
text:
  <apdn_angel> hey, what's the difference between michael
  jackson and neil armstrong?
  <Beerman> neil armstrong was the first man to walk on the moon
  <apdn_angel> and...
  <Beerman> and michael jackson fucks little kids in the ass


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906994
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.638738
text:
  Amy_Lynne.: Oh you hate your job? Theres a support group for
  that, its called EVERYBODY and they meet at the bar.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906995
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.638797
text:
  <yogurt1> dude, the saddest thing happend today. My mom woke
  me up at fucking 9 in the morning, cause our garbage can blew
  open and spread it all around the street. So I throw on
  clothes and go out to clean. It takes me fucking 2 hours to
  finish it. Then some punk kid comes by and kicks it over, and
  it all blows away again. I go up to this kid and I say "You
  stupud fuck clean it" this punk ass kid says to me "haha fuck
  that".
  <yogurt1> I couldn't hear him because I had earmuffs but I
  knew thats what the kid says. So after mouthing off I punch
  the kid in the face and walk home. like an hour later the kids
  mom comes to the door and says shes going to sue me for
  punching...her 13 year old daughter.
  <benji443> HAHA LMAO!
  <jiirco> ROFL YOU PUNCHED A GIRL!!!!!!!!!
  <yogurt1> She was wearing a hat and a hood for fuck sakes!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906995
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.638844
text:
  <Q-Ball> Average Ejaculatory Speed
  <Q-Ball> 28 miles per hour (45 km/hr).
  <Q-Ball> you could kill a small mammal with that


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906995
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.638888
text:
  <Vangalisk> Gawd, if that american idle twat got any heavier
  rotation her makeup is going to fly off her face in large
  cakes


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906996
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.638936
text:
  <@LukeB> I haven't even bothered downloading Second Life
  <@LukeB> I figure I should get a first one before starting a
  second


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906996
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.639012
text:
  <Gryvix[FoN]> any computerexperts around  ?
  <Gryvix[FoN]> I have a  little problem
  <Gryvix[FoN]> my mouse won't work
  <Caedar[SOT]> And I assume you unplugged it and plugged it
  back in. :)
  <Gryvix[FoN]> then I have to shut off the comp right
  <Gryvix[FoN]> I can do it without shutting it
  <Gryvix[FoN]> ???
  <Caedar[SOT]> If it's USB.
  <Caedar[SOT]> Is the port rectangleish?
  <Caedar[SOT]> Or is it a circle?
  <Gryvix[FoN]> Ohhhhhhhhhhhhh.
  <Gryvix[FoN]> Someone unplugged it.
  <Caedar[SOT]> Oh. My. God.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906996
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.639061
text:
  <@WSBN-MeBaD> Why doesn't Osama bin Laden have sex with his
  five wives?
  <@WSBN-MeBaD> Because every time he spreads their legs he sees
  Bush.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906996
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.639128
text:
  <GameOver> I hate the drop off services
  <GameOver> "$0.60 a pound! (minimum $5)
  <GameOver> So you'd have to have bags full of heavy clothes
  <Jorenko> damn
  <GameOver> It'd be nice to just take the bus to work, drop off
  at Spin Cycle, then grab them when I go home
  <GameOver> It's a Wash 'n' Fold service, so they seperate and
  whatnot, too.
  <GameOver> ... but then comes the question -
  <GameOver> - Do I really want a strange Mexican touching my
  panties?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906997
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.639174
text:
  <theSpear> I am NOT gonna donate sperm for money. What would I
  do if, in 18 years, the kid looked me up? I'd have to tell him
  that he was beer money.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906997
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.639237
text:
  <ad_man> ya so me and mitch were sittin in english
  <ad_man> and we always had a habit of writing dumb stuff in
  each other's books
  <ad_man> so he writes in my book "adam is a fagget"
  <ad_man> what we didn't know was that the teacher was standing
  behind us
  <ad_man> so she says
  <ad_man> "it's spelled -ot", and just walked on


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906997
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.639288
text:
  <clay> prostitution is illegal in the united states of america
  <ryano> not in nevada
  <clay> were you conceived in nevada


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906998
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.639345
text:
  <bloodmaster> this guy keeps sending me notices, how do i send
  them back?????
  <`Trust`> ./notice <nick> <message>
  <bloodmaster> ty!
  <bloodmaster> ./notice <Tommyboy872> <hello tommy, my name is
  john i am from michigan im 16! Im 5 foot 11 inch tall, you
  sound cute n we should talk more often ok??>


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906998
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.639417
text:
  <DAMNIT> My god I hate being new clerk at the pharmacy where I
  work...
  <DAMNIT> Today some 80 year old guy comes in with a giant
  syringe, asking if we had it.
  <DAMNIT> The guy handed me it, I took it in my hand, and I
  looked in every part of the store possible cause I had no clue
  in hell what it was.
  <DAMNIT> So, I go in back and ask the owner if we have it or
  can order it, still holding it in my hand.
  <DAMNIT> The owner then bursts out laughing and point at me,
  so I go "What's so funny? The guy just wants to order it?"
  <DAMNIT> So the owner goes "That's a enema syringe. It's
  probally been up his ass plenty of times by the color of it!"
  <DAMNIT> I then procede to calmly walk back to the front, give
  the guy his anal sucker back, and the owner then deals with
  him about ordering it.
  <DAMNIT> Meenwhile I put every soap we have on my hands and
  rub like hell for 20 minutes till my skin is completely raw.
  <DAMNIT> And I'm the laughing stock of the store now, and 2 of
  my relatives work there, so soon my whole family will be
  laughing at me......


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906998
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.639484
text:
  <Snoogans> oh man...I forwarded the goatse.cx site to a
  shitload of people at work
  <Snoogans> heeh
  <Snoogans> all I heard was OH FUCK
  <Catcher80> lmao
  <Snoogans> it was gold
  <Catcher80> where do you work?
  <Snoogans> a large internet security company
  <Catcher80> haha
  <Catcher80> "do your security holes look like this?"
  <Snoogans> I sure hope not
  <Snoogans> then any homo can get in
  <Snoogans> HAHAHAHAH


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906998
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.639540
text:
  <Vile> I saw the most hilarious billboard today. All white,
  with black letters. '"Invite me back to school." - God.'
  <Vile> A being that can create a sunset must communicate with
  us by way of our BILLBOARDS! <Vile> *Driving, glances up at
  one such board* "Jerry. Don't sleep with your neighbors wife.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906999
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.639649
text:
  <gb> BlackDeth: have you ever tasted your own jizz?
  <BlackDeth> no
  <BlackDeth> or anybody elses jizz for that matter
  <BlackDeth> i've shot jizz in my eye
  <BlackDeth> but i wasn't aiming
  <BlackDeth> so i dont feel as bad
  <gb> sure you werent
  <BlackDeth> no i mean there was somebody else at the controls
  <blazemore> did he apologize


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.906999
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.639697
text:
  <suffocate> i wanna know if thewre are any Visual Basic
  packets
  <suffocate> under linux
  <suffocate> ???


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907000
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.639750
text:
  «Kenty» I got a chick customer's number today. :) I'm so proud
  of myself!
  «fiend`» Saying "Ma'am, I need your home telephone number for
  acount verification." is not something to be proud of


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907000
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.639803
text:
  <+[aa]Ho_O> i would fuck any chick i see on the internet
  <+sm4k[X-D]> www.tubgirl.com
  <+[aa]Ho_O> fuck.
  <+[aa]Ho_O> wouldnt WOULDNT WOULDNT WOULDNT WOULDNT


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907000
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.639850
text:
  <StarlightShine> I have a sore stiff hand and a sore mouth :(
  <InvalidUser> *snicker*
  <StarlightShine> I got my trombone yesterday,


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907000
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.639910
text:
  <Chocoboko> I wonder what things would have been like had
  Square stuck with Nintendo.
  <DragonFogel> I doubt we'd see FFT. =P
  <Soulcleaver> Imagine FF7- with all the "objectionable" and
  "offensive" material removed.
  <Indogutsu> <Barret> You Shinra are the vermin, robbing the
  Planet of its dreams! And that makes you King Vermin! So hush
  your mouth, you... you... jackaninny!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907001
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.640009
text:
  <SpaceMonkey> welp, I'll have to give it a shot after I'm
  through downloading concentrated satan
  <norse> realplayer?
  <SpaceMonkey> quicktime


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907001
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.640057
text:
  <WargasM> i like chocolate
  <WargasM> it makes me think of boobies
  <WargasM> i wonder if you could make a woman lactate chocolate
  milk, if the DNA was just right


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907002
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.640100
text:
  [][ceman] I get mine from the fact that for the first 2 weeks
  of playing CS I didnt; know you could buy rifles
  [][ceman] I thought they were scattered on the ground and that
  people kept picking them up before me


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907002
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.640152
text:
  <psyk0mantis> ick . . . gotta reload windows ME on a comp i'm
  fixing
  <psyk0mantis> i'd rather jump into a bowl of tacks from a
  diving board


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907002
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.640200
text:
  <LB|homework> holy fuck, this log in my ass is no longer just
  a pieceful log floating in assjuices, its somehow become a
  battaring ram of "holy fuck i got to go"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907002
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.640247
text:
  <Phix> 70lbs of plutonium fell into san francisco bay off some
  ship or something
  <Phix> did it cause any freak deformities?
  <Phix> well it is San Francisco


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907003
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.640394
text:
  * <r0b3r> sighs and ponders what to do now....
  * <Lynda> ponders, "draw something?"
  <r0b3r> Tried that already. Can't think of anything to draw,
  really.
  <Lynda> draw... a couple, resting in bed together.
  * <r0b3r> blinks at what Lynda says....
  <r0b3r>  No. I don't draw that, thank you ery much.
  <Lynda> I wasn't suggesting anything ecchi.
  <Lynda> I take it you've never had a really serious
  relationship.
  <r0b3r> I have one with someone right now, actually.
  <r0b3r> Just it's an odd relationship considering my character
  is human
  and she is an alien...


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907003
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.640443
text:
  <Toxygene> wow... i feel like shit
  <Toxygene> I think I finally caught the flu going around my
  office
  <Toxygene> nothing quite like a small toilet, an erection and
  explosive diahria


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907003
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.640502
text:
  <WinTek> whats a good efnet server?
  <Julie2> thats an oxymoron
  <ToidyMan> WinTek, good and efnet don't belong in the same
  sentence
  <F`Nar> they don't belong on the same internet


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907004
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.640546
text:
  (idea) i just spent 10 mins troubleshooting my cdr because it
  said that my blank cd "was not ready
  (idea) turns out i accidently put in one of those clear cd
  things at the bottom of the cake box


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907004
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.640603
text:
  <pdd> we like hydraulics because
  <pdd> we like to pretend we're matadors riding a rampaging
  bull
  <pdd> even though matadors don't ride bulls
  <pdd> i had to relate it somehow
  <pdd> you understand
  <pdd> SILENCIO


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907004
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.640659
text:
  <@|KFG|Candle[DDD]> im from uganda
  <@cylyk> interesting
  <@cylyk> i'm canadian!
  <@|KFG|Candle[DDD]> actually im not from uganda
  <@|KFG|Candle[DDD]> where is canada?
  <@swolf> its an american expansion pack


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907005
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.640717
text:
  * ^haksor^ has joined #pipari
  <^haksor^> anyone have a serial for Soldier of Fortune 2???
  <tiltti> Y34H-R1GH-TYOU-N3RD-4SS
  <^haksor^> thanks

  <^haksor^> not enough letters in that???
  <tiltti> try adding -H0L3 to the end of it
  <^haksor^> ok


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907005
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.640774
text:
  <The_Great_Bob> stupid tv shows, stereotyping asian guys as
  horney bastards
  <The_Great_Bob> we are not that horny!!!
  <Chucklez> .....
  <Chucklez> this coming from you, bob?
  <The_Great_Bob> yeah, i lost it for a minute there
  <The_Great_Bob> back to thinking about sex


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907005
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.640826
text:
  <Korru> Quite friendly hacker/account thief
  <Korru> Returned my account, got a message in email with the
  password.
  <Korru> "Thanks for the loan"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907005
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.640876
text:
  <@ITV|VimAtWk> oops
  <@ITV|VimAtWk> just heard a kid fell off our local
  multi-storey car park today
  <+chrisss> how high?
  <@ITV|VimAtWk> high enough for some natural selection


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907006
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.640929
text:
  <dream> five girls.
  <dream> and he's fucking all of them behind all of their
  backs.
  <@reflexive> that's a lot of poon.
  <@plutonium> and herpes.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907007
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.641031
text:
  <@Seth> *** How to Create a Religion in 4 easy steps ***
  <@Seth> Step 1: Create "god", "evil" and "theories"
  <@Seth> Step 2: Write book (should take about a page)
  <@Seth> Step 3: Layer on the bullshit (should now be ~1000
  pages)
  <@Seth> Step 4: Publish and wait for the suckers


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907008
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.641079
text:
  <FoxBot> {MoxQuizz} The question no. 32 is:
  <FoxBot>            (Things) What is the fear of darkness
  known as
  <Stonetree> africaphobia


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907008
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.641128
text:
  * FarmerJoe is the resident pro-war/anti-canada guy
  <soopadeop> <--- canadian
  <FarmerJoe> aww, sorry...I hate you :P


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907008
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.641174
text:
  <kisama> my playlist is full of essential mixes
  <var> essential to what?   your pursuit of perfected queendom?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907009
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.641229
text:
  <pq> i had the funniest complaint from a client this morning
  <pq> <client> when i turn on that machine it tells me my hymen
  is missing
  <pq> <me> do u mean HIMEM.SYS?
  <pq> <client> Yes, thats the one!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907009
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.641322
text:
  < dadexter> I stopped using reiserfs because some of my data
  went missing and my HDD died... ironic, isn't it?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907009
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.641370
text:
  <pixadel> Fine, Java MIGHT be a good example of what a
  programming language should be like. But Java applications are
  good examples of what applications SHOULDN'T be like.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907010
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.641416
text:
  <noodle> the more i remember school, the more it seems now
  like a 7 hour a day job that i didnt get paid for
  <Wwv> no taxes either tho


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907010
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.641480
text:
  <a_passerby> and although she has never given me written
  consent to check her legs, i most certainly have
  <flatface> lol
  <Saotome_Ranma> testosterone alert
  <Saotome_Ranma> woo woo
  <Saotome_Ranma> passerb is becoming horny :o
  <a_passerby> testosterone makes the world go round
  <a_passerby> estrogen makes the world mad and unfriendly
  <Everdraed> Says the person who just went through twenty plus
  pages of Winnie the Pooh hentai
  <Saotome_Ranma> IT WASN'T ALL WINNIE I SWEAR


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907010
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.641526
text:
  <kritical> the doctor made me piss in a cup and i had wacked
  off like an hour earlier...he then walks in and tells me i
  need to cut back a bit on masturbating..im like, "WTF"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907011
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.641586
text:
  <mac5> my mom threw away all the computers i've taken apart
  <mac5> but
  <mac5> i saved the processors
  <Neomonkey57> ...
  <mac5> a pentium 2 and..what i think is a pentium 3
  <mac5> it's got all those little spikey things on the bottom


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907011
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.641637
text:
  <MeatEating> why in the name of fuck are we talking about Star
  Trek?
  <MeatEating> I think I'll leave again temporarily
  <Uncle_Matt> Or you could leave temporally, in a way pleasing
  to us Trekkies.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907011
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.641685
text:
  <TrutHurts> o____o: Christ died for all and one day you will
  acknowledge this fact
  <wired> ORRRR you will die and be dead and you'll wish you
  didnt spend all your time in an IRC channel preaching


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907011
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.641741
text:
  <lemmonza> OK, So I was watching some gangster film on BET
  last night
  <lemmonza> And they showed this commercial obviously for kids
  <lemmonza> Just as i was wondering why they would show a
  commercial for kids this late at night during such a violent
  movie
  <lemmonza> I realized two things
  <lemmonza> One: It was a commercial for kool-aid
  <lemmonza> Two: I was watchin BET


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907012
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.641835
text:
  <DrkNrg`> i once knew a man who took some acid and he thort he
  was a fire engine, it was kinda funny until he pissed on my
  lighter


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907012
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.641894
text:
  <Dynamo> [Destiny's Child - Say My Name.mp3]-[4.34mb/4m 30s]
  <Dynamo> [Pet Music - 04 - Warm Hugs.mp3]-[5.23mb/5m 26s]
  <Dynamo> No one saw Destiny's Child, or Pet Music, aight?
  <Dynamo> [Destiny's Child - Independent Woman Part 1.mp3]-
  [3.6mb/3m 44s]
  <Dynamo> [Pet Music - 08 - Chasing Clouds.mp3]-[4.4mb/4m 35s]
  <Dynamo> This PC must hate me.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907013
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.642040
text:
  <|_Hyper_|> bush on tv :S
  <|_Hyper_|> oh wait
  <|_Hyper_|> it'a documentary
  <|_Hyper_|> something about monkeys :D


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907013
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.642091
text:
  *** Sickenen
  (~hectarcam@vlan401-086-153.maconline.McMaster.CA) has joined
  #cnn
  <Sickenen> is the war in Iraq over yet?
  <Sickenen> din't pay cable bill and phone was cut off awhile
  ago
  <DooD> yet he still has broadband


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907013
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.642227
text:
  <Moe_Rahn> Hey, I actually got mail at 1:40!
  <Moe_Rahn> Spam mail, but still.
  <MagFire> i didn't even get that
  <Moe_Rahn> Haha.
  <Moe_Rahn> I'm more specialer.
  <Moe_Rahn> All the recently legal 18-year-olds are after my
  wang, apparently.
  <Moe_Rahn> If this many teens were after me in high school,
  I'd still be there.
  <MagFire> I'm still pretty excited about the potential for
  getting a larger fckstck and bigger boobs
  <MagFire>:D
  <Moe_Rahn> If everyone responded to those ads, we'd all be
  walking about with 8-mile-long cocks and like size 88ZZZ
  breasts.
  <Moe_Rahn> Those inches would add up...
  <Moe_Rahn> Three inches here, five there, and all of a sudden,
  WHAM! Mr. Happy's a frickin' behemoth!
  <MagFire> I don't think I would want like a 14 inch cock,
  personally.
  <Moe_Rahn> It's odd, though... you always get mail about
  increasing penis length, but never penis girth.
  <Moe_Rahn> What good is 14 inches or 3 feet or whatever if
  it's got no girth to back it up...?
  <MagFire> what good is 14 inches or 3 feet if you don't have a
  warm place to put it?
  <MagFire> =)
  <Moe_Rahn> Point made.
  <Moe_Rahn> You could like put it through a person.
  <Moe_Rahn> Or you could be a dancer, I guess.
  <Moe_Rahn> Some people might pay money to see a 3 foot cock.
  <MagFire> You'd probably be pretty popular in porn
  <MagFire> but seriously...how would you even WALK with a 3
  foot penis?
  <Moe_Rahn> Yeah.
  <Moe_Rahn> You'd have to get like a sheath for it.
  <MagFire> rofl
  <Moe_Rahn> But, would it be 3 feet up or down?
  <Moe_Rahn> That could make a difference.
  <MagFire> Okay, this conversation is finished.
  <Moe_Rahn> Okay... boy, the shit you think of at 2 AM.
  <Moe_Rahn> So... um...
  <Moe_Rahn> How 'bout them Rams?
  <MagFire> I dunno. How 'bout them?
  <Moe_Rahn> I dunno either... I was trying to make
  non-penis-related conversation.


