# quote

date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907014
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.642278
text:
  <ninevolt> I may not be Jesus but my penis gives women a
  religous expereience.
  <skittz> haha
  <skittz> yeah
  <skittz> it turns them into nuns


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907014
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.642328
text:
  <Greywolf2001ca> I formatted my drive because NWN wouldn't
  work online for me today.
  <Nafoi> Uh dude they took the Master Server down for maitnence
  no one can play online...
  <Greywolf2001ca> ....FUCK


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907014
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.642421
text:
  ArgosBM : hell, i think i modong protty good for typihg whting
  my eyes closed
  ArgosBM : ...or not...


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907015
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.642517
text:
  <DragonOnna> Roninjoey, Uses of an AOL disk, #68. Earmuffs
  (glue some fur on one side, then attach a U-shaped piece of
  bent coathanger to both disks).
  <Zibro> DragonOnna, Uses for a shitty script, #58. NOTHING.
  (ie: no use, so don't use it because it's fucking stupid)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907015
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.642574
text:
  <zedebsky> Coughing sucks, but does get you higher :)
  <tonic4> zedebsky, coughing opens up parts of your lungs that
  usually don't get in air, in the case of smoking, smoke, so
  thats how it gets you higher
  <latez> lol
  <latez> we've got a medic


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907016
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.642669
text:
  <GKirk> MCO = Orlando
  <Celestar> MCO == Orlando
  * Celestar notices that he is a C programmer and GKirk is not
  * GKirk slaps Celestar around a bit with a printf and scanf
  statement
  * GKirk compiles Celestar


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907016
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.642727
text:
  <D> I've been blowing my nose on the leg of my pants for the
  past few hours, and now my spoon just fell out of my bowl.
  <D> It landed on a towel.
  <Jens> ...
  <D> I believe this to be God's way of saying "You fucking
  dumbass."
  <ZMan> D. Never reproduce.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907016
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.642768
text:
  geoffduman: :: watches a movie with 2 word documents open,
  mail running and 3 im conversations going with absolutely no
  problems ::
  e l i t e m r p: yeah well once i get my new pc ill watch 2
  movies, with no word cause i dont have it, but instead ill
  open PS and load high res porn for midget transformation, then
  ill chat with hot 13 year olds via AIM AND ICQ... while
  LAUGHING AT YOU


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907017
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.642816
text:
  <psichan> nipple rings remind me of giant castle doors
  <psichan> whenever I see someone showing off nipple rings, I
  want to reach out and yank on them, screaming "SANCTUARY!"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907017
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.642917
text:
  <Guo_Si> Hey, you know what sucks?
  <TheXPhial> vaccuums
  <Guo_Si> Hey, you know what sucks in a metaphorical sense?
  <TheXPhial> black holes
  <Guo_Si> Hey, you know what just isn't cool?
  <TheXPhial> lava?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907018
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.642964
text:
  Cap'n Steve: I have no girlfriend, no money, I live at home
  and work at Taco Bell, but my domains don't expire until 2014
  and DAMN IT FEELS GOOD!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907018
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.643010
text:
  <Bazz> Every day you give me food, and yet I dont eat. I
  always stand on four legs. What am I?
  <Costilled> Calista Flockhart


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907018
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.643099
text:
  <Dee> A man walked along and saw a ladder going up into the
  heavens
  <Dee> he climbed up a ladder and saw an ugly woman
  <Dee> the woman said: 'Take me now or climb the ladder to
  success'
  <Dee> the man got freaked out and started climbing the ladder
  frantically
  <Dee> on the next level, he saw a plain looking woman
  <Dee> the woman said: 'Take me now or climb the ladder to
  success'
  <Dee> seeing a pattern here, the man climbs the ladder again
  <Dee> on the next ladder, he saw a really hot woman, very
  beautiful and sexy
  <Dee> the woman said: 'Take me now or climb the ladder to
  success'
  <Dee> the man is tempted, but thinks, 'If the woman is hot
  here, imagine what it would be like in the next level!' and he
  climbs the ladder
  <Dee> on that level there was this fat ugly hell's angel, with
  a fucking long beard, piercings and decorated with tattoos
  <Dee> the man screamed "who the fuck are you?!"
  <Dee> the hell's angel said "i am cess"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907018
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.643149
text:
  <Uhh_Duh> I've got four kick-ass cisco routers coming in the
  mail.
  <Uhh_Duh> Sorry ladies.. I'm taken...


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907019
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.643244
text:
  <spiregrain> the worst thing about irc is that delay between
  finding the server, and getting logged in.  Why does it
  happen?  What can I do?
  <spiregrain> the second worst thing is dumb questions like the
  above


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907020
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.643347
text:
  <Maduin> Is it weird if you recognize a girl in your inbox
  porn from your highschool?
  <TheUpstairsProTHAway> I think the most comedic answer would
  be, "It depends what part you recognized."


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907020
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.643394
text:
  <TossMonkey> well, people who take a test on the internet to
  see if they have a personality should already know the answer.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907020
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.643445
text:
  <Agent_Mono> vote for me to be op and you will go to heaven
  <ZestyO> lol
  <ZestyO> great campaign
  <ZestyO> you work for the bush administration?
  <Seraya> Sure sounds like it.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907020
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.643499
text:
  <ikkenai> these tortilla chips are growing dangerously salty
  <ikkenai> old dutch is approaching the limits of the sodium
  frontier
  <CanuckGod> ikke: the Ristorante ones?
  <ikkenai> yeah
  <CanuckGod> those things are as salty as a nigger's balls


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907021
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.643547
text:
  <rastakid> Geez .. I really should stop with computers. I
  wrote a valentine card, and signed it with "H4ppy V4l3nt1n3"
  ..


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907021
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.643593
text:
  <@Fat-Burrick> I spent the entire day being normal, now that
  I'm home, I just want to duct tape fuzzy green pipe cleaners
  to my head, turn on the strobe, take off my clothes, and IRC.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907021
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.643641
text:
  <Nike> i went to see LoTR with the flu :P
  <Nike> i was almost carried
  <AardWolf> I tend to go with females... rather than sexless
  diseases


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907022
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.643772
text:
  <mattbuck> !pball
  <mattbot2> | !pball 10 | <Peel> i would start by kissin you
  softly on your lips
  <mattbot2> | !pball 10 | <Peel> whilst undoin your shirt
  <mattbot2> | !pball 10 | <Peel> then i wud move down your neck
  and start kissing your chest
  <mattbot2> | !pball 10 | <Peel> all the while i woould be
  undoin your belt and your trousers
  <mattbot2> | !pball 10 | <Peel> i would then rekease your long
  hard throbbin cock from your underware
  <mattbot2> | !pball 10 | <Peel> and move my tongue down from
  your chest to your waist onto your penix
  <mattbot2> | !pball 10 | <Peel> *penis
  <mattbuck> not that one AGAIN!
  <mattbot2> | !pball 10 | <Peel> then i wud give u the best
  head of your life
  <mattbot2> | !pball 10 | <Peel> and i will let your
  imagination take you from there
  <mattbot2> | !pball 10 | <Peel> NOW can i have my ops back?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907022
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.643836
text:
  <Sherazard> some times i wonder when i was 10 if i had hair in
  certian areas
  <Sherazard> sometimes i wish i could go back in time and check
  <Sherazard> just to put my curiosity to rest, you know
  <Sherazard> but then i think, what would i say to 10 year old
  me?
  <Sherazard> "hi, i'm your future self, take your pants off. i
  need to check something"
  <Sherazard> that'd probably scar me
  <Sherazard> and as a result my current self would be even
  *more* fucked up


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907022
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.643894
text:
  <@Nefro> so Pirates Of The Caribbean 2 sucked?
  <malakian> yeah
  <malakian> it sucks hard
  <malakian> then swallows, sadly
  <malakian> so you dont even see the climax.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907023
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.643999
text:
  <blueroo> Seattle FD has a real time 911 dispatch log online
  <blueroo> that's pretty cool
  <ircsloth> I bet where I live the log would be like 2
  <ircsloth> ours would be like "2:12am Cow on road again"
  <ircsloth> "2:30am Drunk guy passed out in middle of road"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907024
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.644097
text:
  <Malicious> This NEC machine they're advertising... a 300 mhz
  P2 with 32 megs SDRAM and a 4.3 gig IDE harddrive
  <Kythorn> thats like the same as a ferrari with no seats and a
  v2
  <Malicious> Kyth: One that has a tendancy to overheat, mind
  you *P


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907024
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.644144
text:
  Dr SpaZZo: LOLOOLL in the locker room at school
  Dr SpaZZo: Theres this fat, mentally retarded kid who always
  asks us for pennies
  Dr SpaZZo: and someone today gave him a quarter
  Dr SpaZZo: so he started asking for quarters
  Dr SpaZZo: On Monday someone's going to bring in a 500 dollar
  monopoly bill, and maybe some houses


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907024
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.644200
text:
  <Cav> cant sleep, sodomising storm arse goblins are out to get
  me!
  <Rudeboi> cav: apparently they read bash.org and smokeyou.org,
  and didn't want a 'used' arse
  <Cav> hey, your just jealous cause im younger and have been
  laid more by the storm goblins :P


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907024
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.644262
text:
  <zed> I LIKE BREAD AND BUTTER I LIKE TOAST AND JAM SOMETHING
  SOMETHING SOMETHING SOMETHING AND THATS WHY I LIKE CRACK
  <zed> IIIII LOVE CRACK
  <zed> FROM MY HEAD DOWN TO MY BACK
  <zed> ALMOST AS MUCH AS IIIIIII LOVE EGGS
  <zed> FROM MY HEAD DOWN TO MY LEGS
  <zed> BUT I DONT REALLY LOVE EGGS
  <zed> WELL, I LOVE THEM, BUT IN THE WAY A MAN WOULD LOVE A
  FINE CUBAN CIGAR
  <Nelson> zed; wtf song is that?
  <zed> Nelson, IT'S EGG PROPAGANDA MUSIC


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907025
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.644311
text:
  <loko> im not speak spanish
  <loko> I use a translator
  <Kitsa> what language do you speak?
  <loko> spanish


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907025
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.644353
text:
  Kim: brb.. needta potty
  Mike: well thank you for that info
  Mike: my life is complete with the knowledge yer emptying yer
  bladder right now
  Mike: speaking of which.....
  * Mike brb


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907026
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.644443
text:
  Houdini: I have a couple of modems on "long term loan" from
  work :)
  [ape crap]: yer, so do i. then i lent them out to friends on
  ebay.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907026
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.644499
text:
  KArmA-: telemarketer: yeah, I need to speak to your office
  manager please(very gruff voice)
  KArmA-: me: who the fuck do you think you're talking to?
  KArmA-: telemarketer: are you the office manager?
  KArmA-: me: no asshole, I said, who do you think you're
  talking to, with that tone of voice
  KArmA-: me: you don't call up and start barking at me like
  that
  KArmA-: telemarketer: well sir I'm sorry but I need to speak
  to your office manager.
  KArmA-: me: for what? he normally doesn't take phone calls for
  yard apes. . . what do you need to talk to him about that's so
  special?
  KArmA-: telemarketer: !(#*%@ EXCUSE ME?! YARD APE?!?! WHAT IS
  YOUR NAME!?!?
  KArmA-: me: *click*


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907026
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.644560
text:
  <blazemore> my brother is in a quake3 clan
  <blazemore> and he had a ctf game tonight
  <blazemore> and like
  <blazemore> we were walking out of tilt
  <blazemore> his friend goes "dude hurry up, you're gonna be
  late for you clan meeting"
  <blazemore> and these black guys were walking by
  <blazemore> and looked like they were about to kick our asses


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907027
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.644723
text:
  * Jeff challenges fastpak to a jousting match at high noon
  <fastpak> shit. I..uh...my horse is..uh...nonexistant.
  <fastpak> so i guess i'll have to decline
  <FlyNavy> you have to understand that when Jeff says
  "jousting" he really means gay sex
  <FlyNavy> and when he says "wanna play a round of WC3?"
  <FlyNavy> he also means gay sex
  <Jeff> ...
  <FlyNavy> pretty much anything he says boils down to gay sex
  <FlyNavy> :D
  <Jeff> want to have some gay sex?
  <Tektronic> sorry dont have cs installed jeff


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907027
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.644792
text:
  <ehFk> so today in class Mr. Frank was like "Guys, turn to
  page 404...."
  <ehFk> me being a smartass say "Sir.... I can't find it"
  <ehFk> "Michael, It is page 404"
  <ehFk> "SIR! I CAN'T FIND IT!"
  <ehFk> I spent the next two minutes explaining  to my class
  what 404 meant
  <ehFk> and they all looked at me like I was the biggest
  fucking nerd EVER
  <TheTik> wow... speechless.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907028
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.644841
text:
  <dodgey> my g/f somtimes talks to me in html code
  <dodgey> quite cute... eheh
  <dodgey> like i go to bed the other night, she sais
  <dodgey> actually, what did she say


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907028
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.644886
text:
  <Elle> There are two PhDs playing Lego Star Wars II in my
  living room, and neither of them can figure out how to get
  past the first level


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907028
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.644930
text:
  aakashdheer: my grandmother gave me a wish
  aakashdheer: i could either have a perfect memory or a huge
  penis
  aakashdheer: i can't remember my decision


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907028
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.644971
text:
  element: i feel lucky because i won every advertisement game
  today...i have so many free ringtones its not even funny


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907029
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.645040
text:
  <[SA]Gaijinchi> I was ripped as a kid.  When my friends wanted
  to go somewhere on bikes, I ran and kept up
  <[SA]Gaijinchi> Then I turned 16 and promptly got out of shape
  <ricequeen> Yeah, masturbation got me too
  <[SA]Gaijinchi> You can masturbate and drive at the same time?
  <[SA]Gaijinchi> That's incredible.
  <ricequeen> It's an okay substitute for road head
  <[SA]Gaijinchi> that's all kinds of dangerous.  I mean, what
  if you hit a bump or something?
  <hoe4damoney> Just get a crash test dummy to fellate you
  <hoe4damoney> its safer
  <ricequeen> I call it, "Living on the edge"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907029
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.645116
text:
  <herze> miss pearl
  <herze> my love for you is like diherrea
  <helpimarock> what
  <herze> i just cant hold it in
  <madpunk-nap> omg
  <helpimarock> ahhhhhhhhh
  <madpunk-nap> that would alomst be elite
  <helpimarock> thats the sweetest thing ive ever heard
  <madpunk-nap> if i didnt have to do with poop
  <herze> haha
  <herze> madpunk, even stevie wonder could see the beauty in
  you
  <herze> i have a few more
  <madpunk-nap> i dont want to know, im going back to sleep
  <herze> you have over 200 bones in your body... want another?
  <herze> lets play army, ill lay on the ground and you can blow
  the hell out of me


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907029
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.645175
text:
  <@Mouring> "How many Monkeys does it take to run this company?
  "  "One, because you can get them to work for dirt cheap and
  they willwork 24/7."
  <@RndPkt> There was an article in scientific america about
  some study of monkies.
  <@RndPkt> Supposedly some art council in England paid for 3
  monkeys and a computer and wanted to see what they did with
  it.
  <@RndPkt> I guess they beat it with stones, peed on it and hit
  the S key a billion times.
  <@Mouring> rnd, sounds like most end-users.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907029
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.645221
text:
  <malaclypse> The general rule on about people on IRC seems to
  be "Attractive, single, mentally stable: choose two"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907030
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.645273
text:
  <RaVenCorax> someone watched demolition man last night
  <Admiral_Justin> someone did?
  <Admiral_Justin> the ratings are in?
  <Admiral_Justin> :o
  <Admiral_Justin> We must find this man and do many terrible
  things to him.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907030
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.645318
text:
  Madrigal: I once went to an Applebee's with my ex-boyfriend.
  Madrigal: We had this waitress named Jinko.
  Madrigal: He accidentally called her Plinko.
  Madrigal: She came back with five coasters.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907030
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.645371
text:
  <MyKe> YEs, my uk,eybo;ard is o;ffilcilail.il.il.y...bro;uk,en
  (ilf yo;uk co;ukil.dp't teilil), so; IL wo;np' t be c'h;
  attilng mukch fo;r the next weeuk, ukntil the new o;ne co;mes.
  Do;np' t asuk.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907031
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.645429
text:
  <Hostile> And now that i think of it, the west coast should be
  all renamed to the wastelands
  <Scofco> It should be renamed to the east coast
  <Scofco> then we would have 2 east coasts
  <Scofco> it would rid gang violence
  <Scofco> end the east coast / west coast struggle
  <Scofco> with a simple name change
  <Scofco> I AM THE SMARTEST MAN ALIVE
  <Hostile> AGREED


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907031
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.645492
text:
  <BenZor> www.clitical.com
  <w|zzy> better not be prono
  <BenZor> helpful.
  <BenZor> nah
  <BenZor> sex lesson site
  <w|zzy> ok
  <w|zzy> don;t need them
  <BenZor> yes u do u fucking virgin
  <w|zzy> I have 2 sisters man


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907031
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.645542
text:
  <@Blaxthos> five, i know of no police department that has a
  year long academy
  <@Blaxthos> i call bullshit
  <dk|laptop> obviously you haven't watched police academy


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907033
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.645602
text:
  <Jibble> I got a 3.5 this semester :D
  <Jibble> I so thought I'd failed that history exam too
  <MrEnthusiasm> its a computer error
  <MrEnthusiasm> you should be getting a letter in the mail
  rather soon explaining why your financial aide has been
  revoked
  <Jibble> I don't have any financial aid
  <MrEnthusiasm> got the letter I see


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907033
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.645657
text:
  <Brynneh|w3rk> im doing my girlfriend all weekend
  <Brynneh|w3rk> lol whoops
  <Penfold> doesnt stop
  <Brynneh|w3rk> *doing stuff
  <Brynneh|w3rk> *doing stuff with
  <Cavey> I shall mention that quote to her when I next se her
  <Brynneh|w3rk> that was the mother of all typos


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907033
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.645705
text:
  narzy: can you throw in a filter that if it mentions bash its
  auto dumped?
  Protected Identity: Haha
  Protected Identity: No, I prefer the mods suffe
  Protected Identity: r
  narzy: ok, but don't be shocked if you get a jizzed on
  keyboard for X-mas...
  Protected Identity: Dont be surprised if you get a punch in
  the face for new years
  narzy: don't be supprised if you get your scrotum as a change
  purse for easter...
  Protected Identity: Dont be surprised if your mod account gets
  locked in 5 seconds
  narzy: oh shit, im sorry im sorry im sorry...


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907034
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.645757
text:
  <CrushWork> hes got that "im a barbarin caveman who eats
  snails and says ooga booga" style look to him
  <Jed> "I'm a barbarian caveman that eats snails, says ooga
  booga and lays cable for a living"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907034
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.645798
text:
  [opti-alex] is there a tutorial somewhere that walks you
  through step by step on making a php site?!
  [N{t}|slider] www.php.net
  [opti-alex] i found nothing there


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907034
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.645857
text:
  <Fustard> oh good god
  <Fustard> i was just thinking of something to myself
  <Fustard> and out loud i said
  <Fustard> 'laugh out loud'
  <Fustard> instead of actually laughing.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907035
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.645906
text:
  <meatpuppet> is there like a special procedure for making sure
  that the porno dvds come back clean?
  <meatpuppet> im that much less likely to borrow dvd porn from
  my local video store now


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907035
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.646011
text:
  <DTOX> DenverJeepGuy : well check out my picture and see if I
  look too old for you
  <DTOX> babyangelcakes1405 : damn ur hott!
  <DTOX> DenverJeepGuy : so do you like college guys like me?
  <DTOX> babyangelcakes1405 : yeah...
  <DTOX> this 14 year old says she can't fuck me
  <DTOX> 'cause she's grounded
  <DTOX> but in a month she can


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907035
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.646063
text:
  <Filia> If you follow the other two stars in the cup of the
  dipper (Megrez and Phecda) down below the cup, you will get to
  Regulus.html, the brightest star in Leo.
  <Filia> i'll remember that :D
  <Havoc> ....
  <Havoc> The brightest star in Leo has a file extension?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907036
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.646116
text:
  <RetardedMonkey> Fuck I drink too much coke
  <RetardedMonkey> 4 x 1.25L bottles
  <RetardedMonkey> 2 x 2L bottles
  <RetardedMonkey> 2 x 600ML bottles
  <moth> Say hello to my little friend - diabetes


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907036
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.646167
text:
  <l0wkey> im getting hemorrhoids
  <l0wkey> from sitting on my butt all day ircing
  <l0wkey> i should sue Khaled


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907036
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.646228
text:
  <Darric> Dammit. Nothings working.
  <Darric> Maybe my connection died.
  <Darric> Or maybe.... the LAN server died.
  <Darric> Or... THE WORLD'S OVER.
  <Head> that sycks
  <Head> sucks even
  <Darric> Oh. You're still here.
  <Darric> False alarm, everyone.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907037
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.646273
text:
  EvilEye:i just found out that i have competition for student
  government president
  EvilEye:hes blind
  EvilEye:so heres my campaign slogan: "I have a vision"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907037
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.646338
text:
  <fong> can any1 help me..? im trying to connect 2 pcs to LAN..
  <orange1> use a crossover cable
  <fong> i already have a crossover cable, 2 nics in 1 pc, and
  another in the client pc..
  <fong> what do i do next?
  <orange1> put the crossover cable between the two pc's
  <fong> did that already
  <orange1> then they're connected
  <fong> its the configuration part i cant handle
  <fong> yeah.. but i want them connected AND working
  <netmunky> you never said shit about that


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907037
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.646385
text:
  ([Locutus]) wait a minute..here we have its in my enbglsi
  dictionary.." Scrimp, 'prawn "
  ([Locutus]) know it now?
  (@Wagoo) yaw
  (@Wagoo) I look at prawn on the net all the time
  (@Wagoo) I hate when they ask for your credit card details
  though :/


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907037
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.646451
text:
  <guugle> haha im gonna submit that to bash.org
  <Phyresis> What does that one count as? LOL, I AM SUCH AN
  INTERNET ADDICT?
  <Masa> How about HAHAHA THIS TYPO MADE ME LOOK HOMOSEXUAL AND/
  OR STUPID!
  <Phyresis> "This real life situation is analogous to a
  computer/internet situation!" "LOL U NERD"
  <Masa> lol i r n00b n i sux @ computars!!11 watch me format my
  hd on accident!!12~
  <Phyresis> (SEX)
  <Masa> (PUN)
  <guugle> hold on my mom is being my bitch
  <guugle> ...I MEAN A BITCH


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907038
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.646499
text:
  <aer> I don't like pamela anderson type breasts
  <xf> Their remote controls are annoying and not well
  documented.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907038
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.646564
text:
  < Ergo^> Six Stages of Debugging
  < Ergo^> 1. That can't happen.
  < Ergo^> 2. That doesn't happen on my machine.
  < Ergo^> 3. That shouldn't happen.
  < Ergo^> 4. Why does that happen?
  < Ergo^> 5. Oh, I see.
  < Ergo^> 6. How did that ever work?
  < MatthewWilkes> 7. svn blame
  < miniwark> 8. one day we will write tests


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907038
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.646628
text:
  <fireside> cum is teh nasty
  <died_in_sleep> and you know this how?
  <fireside> ive (accidently) and unfortuntly licked some
  <died_in_sleep> you shouldt know those things, unless your dad
  rapes you :/
  <fireside> i can cum bitch
  <dragondyne> how is that possible?
  <fireside> um
  <fireside> it comes out... on finger... i put finger in mouth,
  it taste bad
  <dragondyne> ...
  <dragondyne> I thought you said "accidently"
  <fireside> I WAS HORNY GIVE ME A DAMN BREAK :(


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907039
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.646669
text:
  SilverJstr: I dreamt it snowed last night
  SilverJstr: like, 20 inches
  SilverJstr: I woke with a scream
  ThanatoChaos: Canadian nightmares.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907039
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.647290
text:
  (Guardian_Knight): hey last female HNG I saw I suspect was a
  boy about 13 or so and didn't know a vulvia from a volvo


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907039
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.647339
text:
  ( @drdink ) philb: I bought an IRC server on ebay today
  ( @drdink ) philb: it is going to cost like $100 to ship it
  ( philb ) drdink, do you have the crane ready to lower it into
  position?
  ( @drdink ) it has wheels
  ( philb ) ahh, that's not so bad then. What will they think of
  next? I suppose the new 0.9 micron technology has allowed
  miniaturisation...
  ( Vulcan ) You really are stupid arent you?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907039
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.647409
text:
  <@Serge`> LOL
  <@Lord_Saros> stfu you fuxing noob
  <@Lord_Saros> AOL kiddie !
  <@Deadpool-> somone uses aol here?
  <@Lord_Saros> Sxales does
  <@Sxales> ha
  <@Deadpool-> you make me sick
  <@Lord_Saros> He just keeps his aol line on a low profile
  *@Sxales hides it under a rug
  <@Sxales> what?
  <@Lord_Saros> Nothing (:
  <@Sxales> i'm too fucking cheap to use aol, i just yell in
  binary real loud


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907040
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.647462
text:
  <xcham> I'm going to move to the middle east and start a
  gentleman's club
  <xcham> and call it "the Gaza Strip"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907040
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.647512
text:
  (ndrj): anyone good with sound tech here?
  (ndrj): if i put a pair of cheap mp3 headphones in my PC i get
  lots of buzzing/electric noise, but if I put decent/expensive
  pair in i don't. what is it that removes this, what should I
  be looking for when I buy a pair? :P
  (decx): the sennheiser logo


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907040
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.647559
text:
  <studmuffn> one day i will find a way to implant annoying
  songs in other peoples heads
  <studmuffn> it will be my supervillian power


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907040
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.647613
text:
  <ppg> if guns kill people
  <ppg> then pencils misspell words
  <ppg> and cars make people drive drunk
  <ppg> and spoons made rosie o'donnell fat


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907041
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.647666
text:
  <Gig> Bah, drunk students setting off the firealarm to the
  building, silent one too, so direct to the fire station. So we
  had some fireman knocking on our door trying to get us out
  <Gig> and my flatmate who answered the door shouted out "Hey
  lads! look the stripper's here!"
  <Gig> you would be surprised how fast people got out of their
  rooms


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907041
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.647759
text:
  <[{ug}]> hmm i really should spring clean this pooter. /usr/
  src is taking up 2.1Gb
  <Lithium^> what have you got in there? the sources to your
  porn collection?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907042
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.647805
text:
  <jeer> I have to move to mississippi soon..I wish I had a
  sister or cousin there.
  <jeer> who am I going to date?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907042
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.647903
text:
  <Udeth> my mother came in and demanded that I'd move shit off
  my floor, so she could wash my room tomorrow, because it
  smells rotten in here.
  <Udeth> i can't smell shit.
  <ToRMeNTeD> well if theres shit on the floor no wonder it
  smells rotten


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907042
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.647949
text:
  [08:40] <GreenNight> voodoo mmm
  [08:41] * GreenNight is going to invent a marriage simulator.
  It's a blowup doll that sits on the couch, takes your money,
  and slowly inflates larger and larger


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907043
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.647996
text:
  <iban> when i was your age all i had was a mac, and photoshop
  <iban> if i wanted an online gf i had to draw her


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907043
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.648055
text:
  <lo-d0gg> man.. these quotes are funny as!
  <Ho-Train> what server/channel are you on?
  <lo-d0gg> uhm, no channels.. www.geekissues.org
  <Ho-Train> dammit! i can't connect..
  <Ho-Train> [12:03:15am] *** Connecting to geekissues.org
  (6667)
  <Ho-Train> [12:03:24am] *** Connection attempt timed out
  <Ho-Train> [12:03:27am] *** Connect retry #1 geekissues.org
  (6667)
  <Ho-Train> [12:03:36am] *** Connection attempt timed out


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907043
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.648105
text:
  < cygnus`   > this girl broke up with me once
  < cygnus`   > becuase i was sucking her tit
  < cygnus`   > and i said it was to try and get milk to come
  out
  < cygnus`   > and i started laughing like a retard


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907044
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.648157
text:
  <kai> dwi
  <pancakguy> dealing with intent?
  <Nosnam> lol, dealing with intent?
  <Nosnam> Is it possible to deal without intent? SHIT OFFICER,
  I ACCIDENTLY SOLD SOME POT


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907044
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.648208
text:
  <wankel> can anyone try and get a cd-key for me ive tryed and
  had no luck its for soldier of fortune 2
  <maestro> wankel: can anyone try going to your local wal-mart
  and BUYING THE DAMN SOFTWARE?
  <maestro> if you want to warez it, at least put some effort
  into it :)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907045
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.648355
text:
  <riesto>  So I discovered that half my students are failing
  because they just read bash.org every day in class.
  <tumnest>  How'd you determine that?
  <riesto>  One of them *accidentally* e-mailed me explaining
  how no one does anything in the class, dumbasses.
  <riesto>  So if you're reading this, students, GET TO FUCKING
  WORK!  MODULE 10!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907045
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.648453
text:
  <Beesta> it's clearly time to go home
  <Beesta> I just wrote "getCumming" insted of
  "getCommunications"
  <Beesta> *shudder*


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907046
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.648501
text:
  <KublaiKhan> Pedophiles are like the tortoise.
  <KublaiKhan> They want to get there before the hare does.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907046
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.648615
text:
  <Ronwe> I think I've done one of the evillest things
  imaginable
  <Ronwe> in my twins search I came across faked olsen twin porn
  <D`mer> what?
  <D`mer> ick
  <Ronwe> I downloaded them
  <Ronwe> so I went into channels on IRC the other night and
  said..
  <Ronwe> If anybody is interested in some decent faked celeb
  pron to /msg me
  <Ronwe> those who messaged me got olsen twin porn
  <Ronwe> I'm banned from about 20 rooms in dalnet now
  * Ronwe grins evilly
  <D`mer> lol


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907046
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.648667
text:
  <bloodfart> this homeless dude was eating a pie
  <bloodfart> that someone bought him
  <destx> wicked
  <bloodfart> he got up to cross the road and tripped over,
  dropping the pie
  <bloodfart> as if your life couldnt get any worse


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907047
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.648761
text:
  <crumpiano> i just discovered a revolutionary way to piss off
  my neighbor
  <crumpiano> i can play porn and broadcast the audio out over
  the frequency of the radio station hes listening to
  <crumpiano> HAHAHAHA
  <crumpiano> he cant tell me to turn it down when its HIS
  stereo
  <MAME> you're an asshole


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907047
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.648850
text:
  < dai> my knowledge of c/c++ is comparable to my knowledge of
  women
  < Weeble> dai: got a null pointer huh?
  < pairo> You can always read books about C.
  < shiwan> dai: that doesn't say very much. :P
  < dai> shiwan: you're a cruel one


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907047
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.648928
text:
  <m00> Why does the mexican olympic team suck?
  <m00> everyone who can run, jump or swim is already in the US


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907047
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.648985
text:
  <Carlton>I see someone walking down the street wearing all
  black I think, "Probably has a favourite Linux distribution."


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907048
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.649089
text:
  *** ChanServ (ChanServ@Services.EnterTheGame.Com) Quit
  (Aussie-Hub.EnterTheGame.Com Ky-Hub.EnterTheGame.Com)
  *** BuM (~bum@ool-18bf3781.dyn.optonline.net) Quit
  (Aussie-Hub.EnterTheGame.Com Ky-Hub.EnterTheGame.Com)
  *** igl|Quew{nBw} (~Quew@d150-29-112.home.cgocable.net) Quit
  (Aussie-Hub.EnterTheGame.Com Ky-Hub.EnterTheGame.Com)
  *** deftik (~deftik@ptd-24-194-205-26.maine.rr.com) Quit
  (Aussie-Hub.EnterTheGame.Com Ky-Hub.EnterTheGame.Com)
  <}{^{end}`sk00l> Netsplit Detected Ky-Hub.EnterTheGame.Com
  from: Aussie-Hub.EnterTheGame.Com
  <Nemephosis> thanks for telling us after the fact
  <Nemephosis> isn't that like getting hit by a car then having
  someone say "dude there's a car coming"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907048
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.649176
text:
  <Rune> my car blew up when half a dozen of diaz's friggin
  cronies rammed their cars into mine
  <+Shadow> lol
  <+Shadow> heh I hate it when someone cuts you off in a
  motorcycle and bumps you into a cop
  <+Shadow> and then you try to run away but you can't get on
  the bike with the cop near
  <+Shadow> so you have to kill the cop
  <+Shadow> then you have two stars for no real reason
  <Rune> I hate it when taxis make sharp turns when you're going
  high speed on a motorcycle
  <Jamie_M> for a second there
  <Jamie_M> i thought "wait shadow owns a motorcycle"
  <Jamie_M> but then i realized nobody in here EVER talks about
  real life.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907048
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.649247
text:
  <danien> Here, Palden-, have this sample dildo I found in my
  mailbox.
  <Palden-> is it used?
  <danien> No, it's still vacuum-sealed.
  <Palden-> pfft, then i don't want it


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907049
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.649333
text:
  <DarkNeo> Did you hear about Ku Klux Knieval?
  <LongWongSilver> no
  <DarkNeo> He tried to jump 50 niggers with a steamroller.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907049
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.649375
text:
  <q[merlyn]> lem... know any good austin Perl hackers for hire?
  <q[merlyn]> I'm on a hunt for one for a friend.
  <archon> for a job?
  <Stupid_> No, in his spare time merlyn bow-hunts for perl
  programmers by their scent.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907050
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.649541
text:
  <@HEMI> I'm tempted to start going to work in ripped jeans/
  shirts and tell them that's all I can afford on what they're
  paying me.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907050
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.649610
text:
  <Calvinosaur> You missed philosophy class today, huh?
  <71mm34> yeh
  <Calvinosaur> You know how Mr. Warren's policy is to read all
  the passed notes out loud to the entire class?
  <71mm34> no ive never expereinced it
  <Calvinosaur> Well, we really threw him for a loop today ...
  <Calvinosaur> Josh passed a note that made it around the whole
  class before Mr. W caught it.
  <Calvinosaur> Mr. W read it, walked out the door, and came
  back in ten seconds later.
  <Calvinosaur> We were in stitches at this point.
  <71mm34> wat did it say
  <Calvinosaur> "Mr. W's fly is open."


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907051
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.649667
text:
  <|3itch> MY WOULD BE SISTER WAS AN ABORTION I WISH SHE WASNT
  THOUGH
  <Funk> I WAS an abortion. I'm just very stubborn.
  <Fishfood> i was probably not wanted
  <Funk> You're not wanted NOW
  <Fishfood> but who cares! IM HERE NOW AND READY FOR LOVE!
  <wildkarrdex> I live in the perpetual fear that my parents
  will abort me


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907051
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.649766
text:
  Philips.com "live chat"

  Please wait for a consultant to assist you.
  mfennell will be with you momentarily!
  mfennell says, "Thank you for contacting Philips USA Webchat.
  My name is Maurice. How may I assist you today?"
  You say, "yeah.. i was looking at your digital camera keyrings
  and had a question"
  You say, "i couldnt find what resolutions that were available
  to take pictures in"
  mfennell says, "I will be more than happy to assist you with
  this information but first , please may I have your first and
  last name, zip code, city and telephone number so as to create
  a case file ?"
  You say, "i realize it is 1.3 gigapixels and it comes in
  either 128 or 64 meg memory capacitys, but i dont know what
  res it will take picutres in"
  You say, "er... do you really need all of that info? im not
  sure if im going to buy it or anything.. i just wanted to know
  the resolutions.."
  mfennell says, "We would like this information so as to keep a
  record of each customer contact."
  You say, "but im going to talk to you for all of like.. half a
  minute.."
  You say, "my name and email address was allready submitted..
  that should be more than enough"
  mfennell says, "May I have the model number of the unit
  please?"
  You say, "KEY008"
  You say, "and KEY007.. if there is a difference"
  mfennell says, "Thank you."
  mfennell says, "With an issue like this what we suggest is
  that you contact us at 1-800-531-0039."
  You say, "er.... lool.. ok... im not gong to give them my info
  either"
  You say, "how bout i just look around for a different
  manufacturer that is less creepy.."
  mfennell says, "With an issue like this what we suggest is
  that you contact us at 1-800-531-0039."
  You say, "wow.. generated responses.."
  You say, "really makes me feel i have a genuine connection w/
  the person helping me"
  You say, "well thanx for spending a good 15 min of my time"
  You say, "have a nice day...."
  You say, "try not to seduce any 13 yr olds over the net..."
  mfennell says, "Thank you."
  mfennell says, "Thanks for contacting Philips USA. "
  Your consultation has ended
  mfennell leaves.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907051
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.649818
text:
  <@B-Spider`> you young bastage
  <@B-Spider`> your balls drop yet?
  <@|Qc|Cutthroat> all 3 of them
  <@|Qc|Cutthroat> to my surprise


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907051
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.649864
text:
  <Aenima> if i close my thighs forever......... will it all the
  remain the same??????????
  <Alerik> nope..someone will use a pry bar when you hit the
  morgue


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907052
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.649918
text:
  <Digested> cool :)
  <Digested> you have a gf that knows how to download mp3s
  <madog> ya
  <madog> and email
  <qvr> That's nothing.. I had this goldfish....


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907052
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.649973
text:
  <Duker900> I wonder if quasar dreams in C++
  <Duker900> quasar would like try to have a wet dream
  <Duker900> and he'd get compile errors
  <Duker900> "ERROR: func_erection is undefined"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907052
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.650034
text:
  <Base2> Win2k has that feature where I can be logged in, then
  "suspend" or whatever, and let my girl user her account right?
  <Cosmok> Base2   thats xp
  <Base2> damn it
  <Floach> your girl needs her own damn computer :)
  <Cosmok> who are you kidding, you dont have a gf, just a sock
  <_mrG> hrm
  <_mrG> I guess socks could use a computer, if they are the
  type with toes


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907053
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.650088
text:
  <Schroe> Christ, I don't know how those girls think their
  bones are so attractive.
  <TheNintenGenius> Attack of the Super Thin
  <TheNintenGenius> Of course, they're easily defeated. Just
  tell them they're fat.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907053
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.650136
text:
  <dsf> WHY DOSNT UNDO EXIST IN THE REAL WORLD ?
  <dsf> or cut or paste or copy
  <|M|R|> well that was my Question when my mom brought me to
  this world :D


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907053
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.650227
text:
  <Arafelis> Er, can anyone help me get rid of a virus?
  <Arafelis> I sort of need to before it takes out my computer.
  <Arafelis> It's creating a junk file called WIN386.swp


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907054
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.650280
text:
  <smadge1> Guinness World Records was one site that did
  consider exactly what they were hosting on the web, and made
  necessary changes. The record for "Most Individuals Killed In
  A Terrorist Attack" is 2823 people accord to one page on
  Guinness' site. Guinness has a feature were you can apply to
  "Break this record", and this option was placed on every page
  that contained a record.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907054
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.650326
text:
  icemann182002: YOU ARE FUCKING GAY IF YOU READ THIS.
  violinist394: Fuck.
  Jambalaya : shit, I guess I'm gay now
  Shibs: What? I can't make out the message.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907054
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.650376
text:
  <Debbie_UK> anyway bet you dont even know what Britain is you
  bigot arsehole
  <alex> what's britain???
  <xorg> its about 3 fags north of France


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907055
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.650466
text:
  <michael-> Complaint : Seller won auction but did not send
  payment
  <michael-> Response by mike@soupernova.com - son was killed in
  a car crash, extremely insensitive and impatient seller


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907055
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.650526
text:
  <Freezer_Burn> how do i removed a burned in image from my
  monitor
  <seamuso> buy a new monitor
  <Freezer_Burn> i cant
  <Kornchild> how did you burn an image into yoru monitor?
  <Freezer_Burn> i set it to full screen at high brightness and
  fell asleep
  <Freezer_Burn> there is a faint outline of a naked lady with
  her legs wide open showing her privates
  <Freezer_Burn> and i i have to remove it before my mom comes
  home tomorrow night
  <trance`> Freezer_Burn LMFAO
  <meanolthing`> lol


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907055
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.650607
text:
  <EazyCheez> I know this girl who is really hot and sweet, a
  Big Beautiful Woman... she makes my Captain stand at attention
  <sqweak> hollywood lied
  <sqweak> big is not beautiful
  <EazyCheez> she's 5'2 and 305 or something, but I don't
  care... woo hoo she's wild!
  <TreeSquid> EazyCheez: HOLY FUCK
  <sqweak> DEAR GOD MAN
  <sqweak> that's a fucking keg on legs!
  <TreeSquid> that is disgusting, and you are a crazy piece of
  shit
  <antivert> hungry hungry hippos!
  <TreeSquid> don't ever talk to me again
  <TreeSquid> that's just plain nasty
  <sqweak> how the fuck do you squeeze 300 lbs into 5'2
  <sqweak> thats like, 5 lbs an INCH!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907056
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.650656
text:
  <Bwaa> I tend to do stupid things when I panic
  <Bwaa> Like when I accidently poked my friend in the eye,
  panicked and poked him in the other one.. because it seemed
  the sensible thing to do


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907056
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.650732
text:
  <HUGE_SUCKER> IT'S PART OF TEH CONSPIRACY HATTER DON'T ASK
  WE'LL HAVE TO KILL YOU
  <TimboFinanceBlows> <---!!!!!
  <HUGE_SUCKER> Is that supposed to be a dick, Timbo?  Because I
  read that (including your nick) as "Timbo Finance Blows Cock"
  <TimboFinanceBlows> it would not be far off from teh truth
  <Nicodemus> man... if that is supposed to be a dick, timbo
  needs to see the doctor
  <TimboFinanceBlows> finance sucks my left nut
  <HUGE_SUCKER> Of course, the fact that I see '<---!!!!!' and
  read 'cock' means I've been reading bash too much


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907056
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.650798
text:
  *** civicsi was kicked by Raegen (KK: go away jason)
  civicsi is jason@adsl-208-188-253-138.dsl.stlsmo.swbell.net *
  Jason Preston
  civicsi on #cars
  civicsi using irc2.lightning.net Toca's Miracle
  civicsi End of /WHOIS list.
  *** civicsi (jason@adsl-208-188-253-138.dsl.stlsmo.swbell.net)
  has joined #cars
  <civicsi> uhhh
  <civicsi> HOW DID YOU GET MY NAME?
  <Tokae> we are l33t
  <Darn> haha he hacked you
  <KK> shutup jason
  <civicsi> how did you do that?
  <Tokae> you will be fuct over jason if you act out of line.
  <KK> Mr Preston
  <civicsi> I hope you know that I have logs of all hacking
  attempts
  <civicsi> and I WILL forward them to the DOJ


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907058
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.650848
text:
  ThePseudoNerd: Nobody was eating any of the food, so I said,
  "Finish your food. Think of all the starving kids in Africa."
  ThePseudoNerd: And later on, I hadn't finished my drink, so
  this kid says, "Finish your beer. Think of all the sober kids
  in Africa."


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907058
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.650903
text:
  * dbzfreak pokes javabie
  * javabie fights back by talking javabieish
  <@javabie> hy
  <@javabie> how r u
  <@javabie> asl
  <@javabie> ??????????????????/??//?/?????????????
  <@javabie> ?
  <@javabie> ???????????///
  <@dbzfreak> ..*DIES*


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907059
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.651003
text:
  <Sumez> Echythus is just a weak wizard. He doesn't want to
  retake the world.
  <Sumez> He doesn't even have the power to enslave all humans.
  <Twilo> Hitler didn't have magice powers but he took Poland.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907059
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.651139
text:
  <Brainstew> Eww..
  <Brainstew> If you think somethign is chocolate on your
  keyboard, but your not sure...Don't stick it in your mouth.
  <Citation> let alone on your penis.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907060
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.651242
text:
  <Skitzo> fuck my image, i get off on huge horse wangs inside
  of human female vaginas
  <Skitzo> esp when they fill with cum and it gushes out
  <Skitzo> yeah
  <Skitzo> bestiality :D
  <Skitzo> this is what happens when you go to church as a child
  and attend christian private schools, folks
  <Skitzo> <--------- end result


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907060
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.651303
text:
  <Wealllike> what this "uber" you see so often?
  <timmo> uber - german for over or above
  <Wealllike> I know that
  <Wealllike> I'm german
  <Wealllike> but you write it ü
  <Wealllike> über
  <Inuki> how appropriate. a german being a spelling nazi :P


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907061
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.651355
text:
  <SageChris> and honestly, as amusing as the handicapped are,
  to make fun of them on the internet is just cold...
  <street> they shouldnt have been criminals in their past lives
  <SageChris> hahaha, thats the best excuse i've ever heard


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907061
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.651455
text:
  *** Joins: Morrison (Me@bgm-24-95-151-178.stny.rr.com)
  <Morrison> HI
  <KaeFK> you are not authorized to peruse the content in this
  channel.
  <KaeFK> you shall leave at once or be terminated
  <Morrison> Sorry
  <Morrison> bye
  *** Parts: Morrison (Me@bgm-24-95-151-178.stny.rr.com)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907062
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.651543
text:
  Esi: people have installed linux on their Xboxes so...
  Blayne: When people install Linux on their dishwasher, then
  I'll give them a nod
  Esi: is that a challenge?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907062
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.651601
text:
  <ez76> a mac vs. pc commercial you'll never see: "Whatcha
  doin, PC?"  "I'm playing this new game."  "Oh really, which
  one?"  "Any."  "Oh."  (silence) (fade)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907062
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.651667
text:
  <morientes> some fucker just played a trick on me.. i was
  sitting in the couch.. well all of a sudden my jocks feel like
  their going up my ass crack... i try to pull out the wedge..
  most pain i've ever felt... someone put chewy in my jocks and
  my ass hairs are all stuck together.. stuck to my jocks.. i
  dont fucking believe this shit


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907063
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.651759
text:
  <Jess> r u chatting to her?
  <Orestes`> of course I am!
  <Jess> u want to start a 3 way?
  <Orestes`> kinky.
  <Jess> hahahaha!!!!
  <Jess> well...
  <Orestes`> I'll probably never hear a girl say that again.
  <Orestes`> I'm keeping that.
  <Orestes`> and I'll add it to my "Thing's you'll never hear a
  girl say" archive
  <Jess> don't u dare!!!!!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907063
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.651807
text:
  <[Prae|Code]> As it stands, AvDom is a levelless, XPless,
  HPless, MPless, Classless game system
  <[Prae|Code]> and it is only that way because it was designed
  that way ^_^ <the_Speed_Bump> Sounds intricate.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907063
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.651910
text:
  <gigatron> fett
  <gigatron> anyone
  <gigatron> did u get jk2 yet
  <Hydrac7> I'm trying now
  <Hydrac7> on eDonkey but it's slow as hell
  <Hydrac7> expect me to code it faster than it will download


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907064
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.651960
text:
  <gopus> what does liking big butts and not lying have to do
  with each other?
  <gopus> if I like big butts
  <gopus> does that mean I can't lie?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907065
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.652167
text:
  <Kinsy> my gf thought i was a raging paedo friday
  <Kinsy> i said i was taking photos of 15 year olds
  <Aries> i wonder why shed get suspicious
  <Kinsy> i forgot to tell her i was taking photos of her mates
  little sister who was 15 and was out on the piss
  <Aries> ....
  <Aries> and you were taking photos because?
  <Kinsy> because we were wasted and were having  fun
  <Aries> with 15 year olds?
  <Aries> you were drunk, having 'fun' taking photos of 15 year
  olds?
  <Aries> how does that NOT sound wrong in your head kins?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907065
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.652223
text:
  <scar_> what was the fastest vehicle in ww2?
  <Hatter> ?
  <Hatter> Jet
  <Hatter> ww2 saw the first jet engine
  <scar_> no, silly
  <scar_> a jew on a bicycle through berlin
  <Hatter> :\


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907065
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.652272
text:
  -!- blehhhhh [n=muhammad@213-193-176-96.adsl.easynet.be] has
  joined #perl
  <blehhhhh> hello guys, how am i able to create an array of
  socks ?
  <mmlj4> open a drawer?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907065
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.652319
text:
  ( cyc )  brb
  <--  ( Quit )  cyc (~cyc@nixhelp-23078.esatclear.ie) has quit.
  Reason: (Quit: [X]chat - Who gives a dayum!)
  ( Cybermutt4 )  oi
  ( Cybermutt4 )  that kid is annoying
  -->  ( join )  cyc (~cyc@nixhelp-23078.esatclear.ie) joined (#
  linux).
  ( Cybermutt4 )  welcome back


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907066
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.652372
text:
  <TheM-netbook> yeah, "god" is a concept more than an actual
  thing or state of being
  <+chaosisorder> Like Duke Nukem Forever?
  <TheM-netbook> haha
  <TheM-netbook> god is vaporware


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907066
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.652468
text:
  <Griffin> dont call it rape
  <Griffin> call it surprise sex
  <endfro> hhaaha
  <pagan> whatever works Griffin


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907067
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.652528
text:
  <GodsJiva> cloning should be allowed!
  <f0dder> cloning is bad
  <f0dder> cause there's too many errors
  <GodsJiva> but... if they dont practise, there will always be
  errors!
  <f0dder> just stick to animals at least
  <GodsJiva> yeah, to start with
  <Koding_W> aye. stick to animals.
  <Koding_W> thats my motto.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907067
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.652578
text:
  <gedamo> Some of our customers used to call their computer
  boxes the "brain" and it led tothem calling up saying things
  like "My brain isn'tworking"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907068
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.652680
text:
  <james>once when I was at work at a cafe a man came in and
  ordered 3 'cappucini'
  <morg>haha
  <james>I asked him if he would like a biscotto to go with that


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907068
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.652745
text:
  <iln> she was taking her pants off one time
  <iln> and her underwear
  <iln> and i was watching from the back
  <iln> and i said "damn. you have a nice ass."
  <iln> then she got on all fours and said "you wanna put it in?
  "
  <iln> and thats how i stole kristin doan's anal virginity.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907068
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.652803
text:
  <p_digga> oh god i'm dumb when i'm stoned
  <j3r3miah> why
  <p_digga> i lost something on my desk, and i couldn't find it,
  so i moved my ssh window on my computer desktop to see if it
  was under it
  <j3r3miah> oh god


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907068
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.652851
text:
  <mage> what should I give sister for unzipping?
  <Kevyn> Um. Ten bucks?
  <mage> no I mean like, WinZip?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907069
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.652952
text:
  <@maddox> FUCK!
  <@maddox> my mom just found my website
  <+DMTec> isn't she proud?
  <+khoveraki> ha
  <@naken> you've been on tv 2 times, in the newspapers several
  times, been banned from a country, has 40 million pageviews
  <@naken> and you didn't tell your mother?
  <@maddox> "what is this? Did you draw this? It looks like a
  penis."  "No mom, I didn't draw a penis"
  <+DMTec> ROFL
  <+DMTec> "no mom, i didn't draw a penis" thats good
  <@maddox> now she's crying
  <RichK> haha, your mom doesn't know about your website?
  <@maddox> (on the phone)
  <+DMTec> maddox: did she see the "suprise - I have a
  penis"-greeting card?
  <@maddox> dmtec: oh fuck, I forgot about that.. yeah I guess I
  did draw a penis.
  <RichK> bahahahaha
  <@maddox> hahahahahaha she just said "I wish I would have died
  and not raised you"
  <+khoveraki> rofl
  <@maddox> she hung up
  <RichK> You are dispwned maddox


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907069
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.653058
text:
  * Aphal sets mode: +b brit!*@*
  <Aphal> haha i got u
  * Kat sets mode: -b brit!*@*
  <Aphal> wtf
  * Aphal sets mode: +b cats!*@*
  * Kat sets mode: -b cats!*@*
  <Aphal> >:|
  * Aphal sets mode: +b polaris!*@*
  <Kat> k
  <Aphal> :D
  <Polaris> :(


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907069
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.653116
text:
  <thou> yeah he isn't really that hrd..
  <thou> *hard
  <arak0n> lern sum grammer u fuckin noob
  <thou> damn if I were you, I wouldn't be worrying about other
  people's grammar.
  <arak0n> it jus annois me when all them fukin noobs cum in
  here, an u cant unerstand anytin they r sayin. it make me wana
  just leve the channel
  * thou has left #wii (me too man. me too.)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907070
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.653160
text:
  <limi> does anybody know where the Table of Contents generator
  is, to save me of the embarrasment of talking to a virtual
  paper clip?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907070
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.653208
text:
  <dregan> EGADS THE PAIN
  <dregan> THE BITING, GNAWING PAIN
  <dregan> THE SEARING, UNENDING.. UN.. mmm..


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907070
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.653264
text:
  <Lilmuckers> i watched this great program about gays getting
  murdered
  <crt2k> ...
  <Lilmuckers> well,
  <Lilmuckers> gay people being persecuted
  <IUG> ...
  <Lilmuckers> damnit
  <Lilmuckers> i'm not making this sound good am i?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907071
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.653310
text:
  <T_hibiki_> you catch your lady in bed with another man what
  do you do ?
  <sparatik> tell him she has an STD


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907071
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.653354
text:
  <Pants> you know .. living in australia .. and being raised
  watching so much american television .. sometimes you get
  confused and think to dial 911 instead of 000 for emergencies


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907071
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.653404
text:
  <Brianith> They're the same type of people that think because
  I know computers, that I'm a hacker. And because I'm a hacker,
  I can use a computer to tell their refrigerator to sprout
  legs, walk to me, and tell me their credit card numbers.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907071
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.653454
text:
  <Khuffie> you know there's something inherently wrong when the
  first thing you do after you wake up is check your computer
  for any messages, yet you know for a fact that you can count
  the number of people who care using two hands
  <Khuffie> wait
  <Khuffie> make that one hand


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907072
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.653502
text:
  <vsync> my hand is banging against the keyboard, seizure-like
  <tokage> vsync: is your masturbation coordination nerve acting
  up again?:)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907072
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.653566
text:
  <ChaosTeacup> playing fucking?
  <ChaosTeacup> fucking isnt a game, its a very very serious
  sport
  <Chiri> it can be quite competitive
  <ChaosTeacup> although its best if you end in a draw
  <Chiri> but the professional leagues aren't very respected as
  a career path
  <ChaosTeacup> its best to play in the minors
  <ChaosTeacup> wait
  <ChaosTeacup> no


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907072
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.653613
text:
  <rob`> wai, self-pity.  is there anything more pathetic? :)
  <nev> *nod* whining about it on irc ;)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907073
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.653662
text:
  ashgromnies: Let's play some Oregon Trail
  technocloak: I've never played that game since fourth grade .
  . . the character I named after myself DIED on my birthday.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907073
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.653712
text:
  <schmidt> i can kill a person with no hands
  <SirBlack> so can I, when they don't have hands it's hard for
  them to fight back :P


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907073
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.653764
text:
  <everydayiscatday> im gunna hack the nickelodeon website and
  put a giant picture of my cock on it instead
  <ramoth4> I think they have cock ID databases now
  <ramoth4> after 9/11 you know


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907073
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.653837
text:
  <dinarchvs> my friend sobel just had a great idea
  <dinarchvs> fuck this 3d-accelerating game video hardware
  <dinarchvs> we need smut-specific hardware
  <dalias> ?
  <dinarchvs> like an on the fly compression/decompression chip
  that specializes in compressing fleshtones in images to save
  bandwidth
  <dalias> hahaha
  <dalias> dude, go get some
  <dinarchvs> or hardware-based algorithms to help render smut
  faster
  <dinarchvs> like a nipple algorithm to accelerate nipple
  drawing
  <dalias> you're developing a pr0n obsession
  <dinarchvs> a special dick rendering chip
  <dinarchvs> that can draw over 2000 dicks/second
  <auspex_> there is pr0n specific hardware... gigabit ethernet


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907074
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.653896
text:
  <evildoer> EXCERRENT
  <Kitsa> what are you babbling on about?
  <evildoer> EYE BOUGHT A NEW GITARE AND POLICE QUEST + SWAT
  COLACTIAN
  <Kitsa> lol
  <Kitsa> ah
  <evildoer> IT ES TEHS QUALETY GITIR FOR 5 DOLARS
  <Kitsa> flea market?
  <evildoer> yas
  <Kitsa> what did you barter, your spelling ability?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907074
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.653939
text:
  (Circastes) hmm
  (Circastes) i want to watch tomb raider
  (Circastes) but i just jacked off
  (Circastes) so it wont be very interesting


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907074
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.653981
text:
  ([Smaug]) im actualy homo-phobic
  ([Smaug]) honest
  (+Porn-Star) he thinks anyway
  ([Smaug]) once i saw a gay person and i just started running
  (+Porn-Star) u catch him?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907075
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.654032
text:
  <@tumult> m what is this piano girls obsession
  <@piano_girl_man> tumult cute girls who play the piano
  <@tumult> piano_girl_man and what reference are you basing
  this on
  <@Hiryu> elton john


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907075
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.654074
text:
  (skankman) apparently i have tasty jizz
  (skankman) i heard paper crumpling in the hallway
  (skankman) and i went to check it out
  (skankman) and my dog was licking a piece of paper with my
  jizz on it


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907075
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.654118
text:
  <Powie> When sucking my dad I know which women in the family
  are pregnant, and which are in their period


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907076
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.654166
text:
  <niglet3> my "father" sent me a mail with an image (joke about
  florida's voting procedure, has a picture of some fisher-price
  toy) -- the source?  forum.incesttaboo.com ...


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907076
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.654226
text:
  <Godsey> there is a problem w/ our house :)
  <Godsey> there is a small cosmetic call next to the toilet
  <Godsey> and I'm afraid my fat ass won't fit :)
  <Godsey> so I'm taking the wall out
  <etrigan> with your ass?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907076
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.654308
text:
  <some_big_boobs> YOU'RE GAY
  <some_big_boobs> YOU'RE GAY
  <some_big_boobs> YOU'RE GAY
  <Quintus> let me get this straight
  <some_big_boobs> YOU'RE GAY
  <some_big_boobs> YOU'RE GAY
  <some_big_boobs> YOU'RE GAY
  <Quintus> if i understand you correctly
  <some_big_boobs> YOU'RE GAY
  <some_big_boobs> YOU'RE GAY
  <some_big_boobs> YOU'RE GAY
  <Quintus> two words, two syllables, sounds like..


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907076
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.654358
text:
  <sano_> argh
  <sano_> i just wrote a backup script
  <sano_> and then i overwrote it
  <sano_> and i dont have a backup of it


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907077
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.654417
text:
  <bishead> man there is such a difference between online comp
  players and online console players.
  <bishead> when i play cs my sexuality is attacked like a
  hundred times and my mother's weight mentioned 50 times.
  <bishead> i was playing some guy in madden 2004 on ps2. and
  this guy was all like "hey man ur doing pretty good" and
  giving me tips and shit.
  <bishead> but i've been playing cs too long. blurted out i
  wanna fuck ur mother with a pole.
  <bishead> i kinda felt bad after.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907077
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.654466
text:
  <KingJehu> you poeple that had part in the steal of this room
  should be down right shamed and all you that agree with it
  should be shamed as well, your not of Christ, your evil of the
  devil... if this room had problems "which it did" then all you
  had to do is not come here simple as that!!! YOUR OF THE WORLD
  though so you cant see hwat this does to the shake of the name
  of Christ!! the athiest are having a field day... hope you are
  proud!!!
  <ircbuddy> Stop whining.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907077
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.654507
text:
  Zizzy: The Bible was the first known recorded Wiki, proving
  once and for all that Wikis are destined to be screwed up by a
  bunch of teenagers.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907078
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.654576
text:
  * grannyman jams a slight tune
  <grannyman> just slightly
  <grannyman> not quite full-on
  <grannyman> just slighty sub-par
  <grannyman> but not yet sub-woofer.
  <grannyman> or sub-sonic
  <grannyman> just kinda like sub-way
  <grannyman> you know, like eat fresh all day
  <grannyman> BUUU dubba Duuuu dubba Duuu dubba deeeee
  <grannyman> SHIIIIIIIIIIINEEEE~~~~~~~~!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
  <grannyman> dude, I wish i could emulate instruments through
  IRC.
  * grannyman was k-lined by Q (Jesus, I'm a bot, and I can't
  even take this shit.)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907078
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.654621
text:
  Sexay Prof Long: Opera 10 is going to require a resolution of
  1280x1024
  Sexay Prof Long: it will contain a 1280x1000 ad
  Sexay Prof Long: leaving you 24 pixels of vertical space for
  internet browsing
  Gothic: haha
  Gothic: It'll open a whole new avenue for 1280x24 porn


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907078
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.654666
text:
  Tre Moi: OMFG I JUST POURED ICEWATER DOWN MY PANTIES
  WaCKo3629: ......
  WaCKo3629: I don't see how you could accidentally do that.
  WaCKo3629: Or not realize what would happen.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907078
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.654733
text:
  <[SCSI]Zuph> i found it on some japanese site
  <[SCSI]Zuph> maybe it will be in japanese
  <[SCSI]Zuph> japanese writting looks cool
  <[SCSI]anon> doubt it
  <[SCSI]Zuph> i'm thinking about going to babel fish, and
  translating "Cute japanese girlfriend wanted" then put that on
  a shirt
  <[SCSI]Zuph> and no one will no what it means
  <[SCSI]Zuph> unless their japanese
  <[SCSI]Zuph> but they won't respond
  <[SCSI]Zuph> unless their cute, and a girl


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907079
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.654787
text:
  <Anarky> What's the best thing about twenty-eight-year-olds?
  <Timofee> Dunno?
  <Anarky> There's twenty of them dude


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907079
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.654847
text:
  <toqer> hey germ, I think you would like my wifes friend
  michelle
  <Germ> does she like sex
  <toqer> next time you're out here, we need too hook you two up
  <Germ> No thanks i dont like being "hooked up"
  <toqer> she like sex, weed, and eating
  <Germ> eh
  <Germ> wait how much eating?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907079
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.654905
text:
  <Roosevelt> !choose do work, play games
  <RoBoBo> Choice: do work
  <Roosevelt> bah
  <Roosevelt> !choose listen to a stupid bot, don't listen to a
  stupid bot
  <RoBoBo> Choice: listen to a stupid bot
  <Roosevelt> :(


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907080
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.654967
text:
  <Affe> haha my mom just got an email from adultcheck that was
  supposed to go to my stepdad
  <Ouroboros> Busted!
  <Affe> she's like "adultcheck? i hate all this spam" and she
  clicks on it to delete it, and up comes the preview "dear
  william (my stepdad), on such and such a date you ordered...."
  <Affe> haha
  <Affe> she's all like "asshole"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907080
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.655070
text:
  <Evil Steve> Theres an advert in MSN Messenger: "Buy your
  winning lottery ticket here"
  <Evil Steve> I reckon thats false advertising
  <Evil Steve> I should buy one then sue them when I loose
  <AnonymousPosterChild> I can represent you in court
  <AnonymousPosterChild> I got my law degree online


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907080
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.655133
text:
  <Chris> man.. i've got such a bad cold, I keep gettin
  nosebleeds. it's awful
  * Joins #aesir: -Mike0r-
  <Chris> I mean, last night.. I blew my load into a tissue
  right
  <Chris> but it just started bleeding...
  <Chris> I had to pinch it to stop it, cos it bleeds for ages
  <Chris> I swear one day it'll happen and i'll die from blood
  loss :(
  * Quits: -Mik0r- (Quit: what. the. fuck. note to self, don't
  ever hang out with you guys.. ever)
  <Dan> ehh


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907081
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.655284
text:
  <Xira> I seriously hope ATi catches up with nVidia
  <Xira> (read: OpenGL)
  <ByronT> I seriously hope my wife is in good mood tonight.
  <ByronT> (read: sex)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907081
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.655332
text:
  <nntndgrl> wanna cyber?
  <nntndgrl> what do you have on right now?
  <ghalath> Umm.. MSN, mIRC and Winamp, why?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907084
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.655476
text:
  <Zenith`> he went all "want a nut"
  <Zenith`> and he was like "sure"
  <Zenith`> and one thing lead to another, and now kort has anal
  warts


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907085
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.655526
text:
  <freedumb> When i was like 8 my dad tried to teach me to count
  cards in blackjack
  <freedumb> for when im 'of legal age'


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907085
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.655621
text:
  <Flik> That was so awesome
  <Flik> I need a twin just so that I could do cool things like
  that
  <KeeperX> incest porn?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907086
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.655677
text:
  <h00k> making a twitter bot to watch a timeline of a certain
  (prominent public figure, politician) and tell him he had [x]
  amount of characters left when he tweets
  <h00k> 'went 2 $place 2 talk about r jobs'
  <h00k> Dear @personsname, you had [x] characters remaining and
  didn't have to shorten it so much. #pleasestop'


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907086
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.655730
text:
  <Tobal> looks like the UK is working to make pot a
  non-arestable offence
  <ssrit> I'd move there.
  <ssrit> Where is that?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907086
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.655788
text:
  <RevengePimpy> i found a lifestyles condom in my car
  <RevengePimpy> in the back seat
  <RevengePimpy> I can't reamber the last time someone rode in
  the back seat
  <RevengePimpy> maybe someone broke into my car to fuck or
  something
  <RevengePimpy> it boggles my mind


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907086
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.655842
text:
  <skychic> how do you exit channels?
  <anarch> use /quit
  *** skychic has quit IRC (Quit: Leaving)
  <anarch> heheh
  *** skychic has joined #lummies
  <CrashCat> hmm, you must have missed a parameter
  <CrashCat> try /quit #lummies
  <skychic> cheers!
  *** skychic has quit IRC (Quit: #lummies)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907087
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.655894
text:
  <Pi> Violence solves everything.
  <Pi> If you have a problem that violence doesn't solve, then
  you're not using enough of it.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907087
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.655991
text:
  depletedsoul: Dam, my in car CD player has broke!, ive been
  forced to use the dreaded tape deck, gosh it sounds rubbish.
  Anyone wanna buy me a new cd changer?, cheers.
  Boonjam: tapes are shit
  ninav: i don't really like tapes but i gotta use them for
  french and german ¬_¬
  ratnerstar: Make sure you keep them separated or pretty soon
  all your tapes will be German.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907088
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.656035
text:
  <Thes2K> OK, PLEASE DO NOT TAKE THIS OUT OF CONTEXT, BUT DOES
  ANYONE KNOW WHERE I CAN FIND PICTURE OF NAKED BLACK MALES?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907088
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.656085
text:
  TheOrigionalFuzz: this one guy was yelling at me in spanish
  the other day, so I said "speak a real language or go to hell"
  and he kept yelling at me, and it was pissing me off, so I
  flipped him off, so he started chasing me, so I started
  running, and that's about it
  TheOrigionalFuzz: turns out I was on his property
  TheOrigionalFuzz: or something


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907088
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.656142
text:
  <mrfy> hmm.  my title choice was questioned
  <pembroke> what title did you ask for?
  <mrfy> software zymurgist
  <mrfy> "I was curious, since 'zymurgist' usually has to do
  with the chemical fermentation process in the production of
  wine. Perhaps that's a term also used in software, and I
  apologize for having second guessed this if that is the case."


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907088
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.656203
text:
  <Devilbunny>  I just got back from a team-building meeting at
  work.  There was pizza and the managers did karaoke, and we
  played games.
  <Devilbunny>  We played Cranium, basically a team based
  trivial pursit, with cards like "draw a picture and have your
  team guess what it is," or "hum this song and have your team
  guess."
  <Devilbunny>  The last card was charades, for the word
  "hormone"
  <Devilbunny>  ...
  <Devilbunny>  So, next week's meeting will be sensitivity
  training.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907089
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.656262
text:
  <anon> Right now i'm watching this porno
  <anon> Asian dude gets on bus full of white highschool girls
  and gets raped
  <anon> I've been on a school bus before and this didn't
  happen. I'm beginning to think that porn isn't based on true
  stories.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907089
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.656311
text:
  * yossarian doesn't have a middle name
  <yossarian> i was going to press charges against my folks for
  circumcising me anyway, i might as well throw in "lack of
  names"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907089
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.656363
text:
  <dokutake> i never saw the appeal of buttsex anyway
  <dokutake> i mean, receiving, there's a cock up your ass, and
  if you're giving, you're getting poo on your wang


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907090
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.656458
text:
  <DocGonzo> i need to shoot myself in the face... i
  accidentally typed "the" instead of "teh", so i backspaced and
  fixed it


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907090
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.656504
text:
  <_L_E_S_T_A_T_> i got a question for all u horney people out
  there......wuts the best thing a guy can say after sex?
  <fatbastard_> be right back
  * fatbastard_ has left #the=channel


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907090
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.656552
text:
  <D1> today, I started the supermodel diet.
  <maff> that must be a step up from the all sperm diet you were
  on


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907091
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.656622
text:
  <Werdnum> if (nickj.nationality == "au") { nickj.print("Yes");
  } else { nickj.print("No"); }
  <nickj> "yes" and "no" - dual Aus / Uk (born Edinburgh)
  <Werdnum> nickj: I'm pretty sure that's a non-standard parser
  ;)
  <nickj> hey, I deliberately try and put down answers that I
  know will confuse the system when filling in forms, so why
  should this be any different? ;-)
  <Werdnum> nickj: SQL injection on the census?
  <Werdnum> Name: Andrew'; DROP TABLE person;---


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907091
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.656667
text:
  <dr_binks>I think they should start rating bash quotes
  according to how stupid the people are, not how funny the
  quotes are.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907091
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.656721
text:
  <PsykoFaerie> everyone got into discussions about how i must
  have an eating disorder. :|
  <monk[e]> psyko, if you throw up right after eathing...
  intentionaly... you have an eating disorder
  <Aelhaeran> Pysko: and if your prone to sharp, stabbing pains
  in your eye after a meal, chances are you have a fork lodged
  in it.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907092
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.656949
text:
  <Aragel> goth  in this area means...mommy and daddy both work
  till 6pm and im home alone all day so i rebel by looking like
  a racoon and wandering main street claiming to have a drug
  problem and drinking Lattes for attention


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907093
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.657048
text:
  <bleak> ablsh vwls! vwls r spm!
  <bleak> t's wll knwn fct tht vwls s t mch bndwdth
  <Alanna> bleak: OMG, for a moment there I thought that you had
  learned Welsh


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907093
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.657100
text:
  <Powerlord> I don't get laid enough to spell correctly
  <trythil> laid?
  <trythil> rofl
  <Powerlord> erm... paid enough


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907093
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.657147
text:
  <zoe> yeah i think so b/c otherwise, using equation 4.5 you
  get the force and then to work back to torque is nontrivial i
  guess.....how were you going to do it?
  <GreenPenInc> the same way i was doing all the other problems,
  by banging my head against the desk and weeping softly


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907093
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.657200
text:
  <jamesm> what's a java strategy?
  <undrewb> jamesm : its a paradigm shift to e-leverage your
  legacy OLTP system to implement pervasive business systems
  <jamesm> is it like a builder with a 'brick strategy' ?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907094
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.657256
text:
  *** MindWreck (sifu98@ip3e835487.speed.planet.nl) has joined
  channel #asianpop
  11:07 <MindWreck> !list
  11:07 <poeham>  --- #asianpop :You're not channel operator
  11:07 <poeham> :(
  11:08 * poeham was ready to kick that time :(
  11:08 <poeham> hey you
  11:08 <poeham> LEAVE
  *** MindWreck has left channel #asianpop
  11:08 <poeham> $$
  11:08 * poeham is just as effective from the sidelines


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907094
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.657354
text:
  <fraseyboy> you know what i just realized?
  <fraseyboy> I can be anyone i want on IRC!!!!!
  <fraseyboy> ...
  * fraseyboy is now known as fraseyman


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907095
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.657401
text:
  <eugenics/#help> hi, i was going to search for how to cook an
  omlette online.. but i dont know how to spell it


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907095
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.657447
text:
  <KainSularei> ah, bash.org
  <KainSularei> 17037 quotes approved; 13482 quotes copied from
  the top 100 bash quotes pending; 5 original quotes pending


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907095
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.657494
text:
  * nqbw is watching a pair of lesbians, one serving, one
  receiving.
  <nqbw> To clarify, I am watching Wimbledon.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907095
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.657538
text:
  <czechreck> Hey.. I was totally shit faced, I could have
  impreagnated
  my dog and not known untill I got an ugly litter


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907096
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.657586
text:
  *** jonathans changes topic to 'PLZ FWD ALL PACKAGES MARKED
  "GAY" TO PROPER DEPARTMENTS (IN REAR)'


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907096
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.657628
text:
  (@Thwark): if masturbating improved penis growth, not only
  would we all *know*, but it would have entire library wings
  dedicated to the study.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907096
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.657684
text:
  <_SnakeMan> do the clocks change tonight?
  <AlbinoLov> I think they do sunday/
  <MiL0> yes
  <MiL0> unless you live in some parts of indiana or arizona
  <_SnakeMan> sometime in the early am of sunday, right?
  <Argent-> The clocks change every night... into fierce blood
  sucking imps that chase me around the house until I fall over
  exhausted, then they mock me about my small genitalia.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907097
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.657739
text:
  <novocain> so i have a "lesbian hot tub party to go to next
  weekend
  <JFalcon> novocain, good for you, did you make sure they have
  running water?
  <novocain> its my wife's lesbian friends


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907097
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.657832
text:
  Scrodule: i have an interesting obesrvation
  ezeerB: ?
  Scrodule: if you swing your finger by your ear really fast,
  you get this very low sounding "wfff" noise
  Scrodule: hmm, that sounded more profound while i was thinking
  about it


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907097
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.657890
text:
  <Volt9000> I had wood today
  <Volt9000> I'm proud
  <AL9000> Me too
  <SROL> I did, too
  <SROL> And I believe we all know what happened soon after
  <AL9000> Volt's pet goat hid behind the couch


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907098
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.657942
text:
  <Cute_Fuzzy_Kitten> HATE
  <Cute_Fuzzy_Kitten> PAIN
  <Cute_Fuzzy_Kitten> LOATHING
  <Somebob> Can I have some?
  <Cute_Fuzzy_Kitten> no.  this is my own personal stock.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907098
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.658038
text:
  mzazchw: just then i felt my side
  mzazchw: and i was like "why do i have a scab???"
  mzazchw: then i looked at it
  mzazchw: .............................
  mzazchw: .... it was dried cum


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907098
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.658084
text:
  <s2k|D_Holt> anyone have scented condoms?
  <s2k|Alchemeron> after using them, all condoms are scented


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907099
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.658144
text:
  <Chris281>Dude, i had a really weird dream last night
  <Chris281>I kept dreaming that all of my data was lost because
  my harddrives crashed
  <Chris281>And my backups were nowhere to be found, so the
  situation was fubar
  <Chris281>So I woke up, soaked in sweat and checked whether my
  backupjob was running
  <Chris281>And it wasn't because for some reason the LTO drive
  was jammed
  <Vantheman>It's the classic nerd-shining


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907099
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.658189
text:
  <Dr_Pain_> i need help here about a cble modem to nuke theres
  a girl who has take my nick and put it on a child porn chan
  and im unable to nuke that bitch shes on cable im in winshit


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907099
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.658236
text:
  toAzron1:Did you ever notice, when you are sitting at a red
  light, that when the person in front of you pulls up a couple
  of inches, you are compelled to move up too? Do we really
  think we are making progress toward our destination? "Whew, I
  thought we would be late, but now that I am nine inches
  closer, I can stop for coffee and a danish!"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907100
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.658289
text:
  <Lothodrus> time for the sleeping
  <Lothodrus> night
  *** Lothodrus has left #rpgfan
  <Flik> I ought to join him
  <Flik> Well...not literally join him...but join him in thought
  <Flik> Not that I would be thinking about sleeping with him,
  though...
  <Flik> ...
  * Flik sobs quietly


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907100
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.658387
text:
  <|Chris> anyone else got beer?
  <|Chris> wanna play a drinking game with me?
  <|Chris> everytime a line contains a word, you have to drink.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907100
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.658435
text:
  <nwinter> i am personally more concerned about israel and
  palestine
  cutting ties with each other than who's whipping who. :)
  <nwinter> but perhaps i am being trendy in my concern for more
  interesting
  issues. :)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907101
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.658542
text:
  <Que> i don't mind talking
  <Que> but having pictures of my penis online
  <Que> yeah, not safe
  <Throttle-OSX> nah, havin yer cock and yer face in the same
  pic is not safe ;)
  <Odin> lol
  <Throttle-OSX> havin yer cock and yer exgirlfriends face in
  the same pics...now thats just funny


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907102
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.658632
text:
  <nexxai> stileproject.com....what a wonderful place
  <xsneakerx> yes. place of the bored and horny.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907102
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.658703
text:
  <ggeyton_hewitt> <_git_> hey folks, what does @ mean in front
  of someones nick?
  <ggeyton_hewitt> <thorn``> The @ symbol identify's the channel
  operators.. Chops have extra commands for control of the room
  <ggeyton_hewitt> <_git_> does it mean that persons is a sad
  wanker who spends his life on irc, has no real friends, and
  prefers to chat on here than in a pub?
  <ggeyton_hewitt> it's funny cos it's true
  <Syncope> lol
  <Syncope> very true
  <Syncope> :/
  <ggeyton_hewitt> `deop
  <Syncope> `deop


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907103
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.658837
text:
  <alobodig-2> Spraying a can of Dust-Off directly into my navel
  was just about the worst idea I've ever had.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907103
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.658908
text:
  <Destruya> We were in Ashland, VA, coming back from unloading
  my shit into a rented SUV coming back from school
  <Destruya> And there's this van, California tags in this
  McDonalds we pull into
  <Destruya> Ashland is only good for three things
  <Destruya> Bathroom, food, gas
  <Destruya> Nothing else
  <Destruya> Perfect rest stop
  <Destruya> Anyway, these stereotypical fuckin' Westies are in
  this Central VA bumfuck McDonalds asking for Cappucinos at
  11:30 at night.
  <Veen> heh, fucks.
  <Destruya> Then, when the black lady at the counter recommends
  coffee, they ask where the nearest Starbucks is.
  <Destruya> It's like, SHIT, people - get a fucking Coke and
  move on with life.
  <Destruya> Caffeine is caffeine


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907103
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.658958
text:
  <hawk> health class was the greatest
  <Kirk> ...
  <Kirk> Heh
  <JuKe> even losers like you get to see vaginas


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907104
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.659014
text:
  Tuco forces you all to sing Fraggle Rock
  Daedalus [FS]: Dance your cares away
  Meatpack [FS]: Worry's for another day
  Fokker [FS]: Let the music play
  TheChosenOne [FS]: Down at Fraggle Rock
  bilblak [FS]: Work you cares away
  yoda99 [LC]: Dancing's for another day
  omothes [LC]: Let the Fraggles play
  CrazyHorse [CC]: We're Gobo
  Cantwell [CC]: Mokey
  Mycroft [FWL]: Wembley
  The Nomad [FWL]: Boober
  -Blade- [DC]: Red
  DarkElf [DC]: Dance your cares away
  Nazgul [DC]: Worry's for another day
  HepBbI [DC]: Let the music play
  kailindo [P]: Down at Fraggle Rock
  crazyhorse [CC]: lol
  iinaj [P]: Down at Fraggle Rock
  >> Enter Brandon Malthus
  adept [P]: Down at Fraggle Rock
  Kommando [SOL]: thats awesome
  Baron Morgan [P]: its awesome when its fraggle rock... its
  scray when its YMCA...


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907104
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.659070
text:
  <R0SC0E> i think [shaolin soccer] was about to be released
  same weekend as Resident Evil
  <R0SC0E> but they pushed it back to not be in competition
  <mightyflo> zombie soccer!
  <mightyflo> you could put the shaolin soccer guys up against a
  bunch of zombies
  <mightyflo> they could do like bullet kicks and blow their
  heads off and stuff
  <nitrifik_> no, zombies against zombies
  <nitrifik_> slowest soccer game ever


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907104
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.659122
text:
  <Suparmono> its a dilemma, i dont ask girls out. No, there is
  only one way to go about this
  <tynka> oerr.. and what's that?
  <Suparmono> NONCONCENTUAL INTERCOURSE
  <Suparmono> except spell consent with an S


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907104
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.659164
text:
  [Doctahluuuvvv] ::  I just got fucking attacked my a huge ass
  spider.
  [Doctahluuuvvv] ::  *by
  [Doctahluuuvvv] ::  I looked up to see this huge spider on my
  monitor.
  [Kendros]@::  lmao
  [Doctahluuuvvv] ::  THE MOTHERFUCKER JUMPED ONTO MY FACE
  [Doctahluuuvvv] ::  I FELL OVER BACKWARD
  [Doctahluuuvvv] ::  As I was typing randmo gibberish I hit
  ctrlatldel two times or something.
  [Doctahluuuvvv] ::  My computer was off after I killed it.
  [boner] ::  nice
  [Doctahluuuvvv] ::  Nice my ass.
  [Doctahluuuvvv] ::  I punched myself in the face :/


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907105
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.659214
text:
  <My`Albanian`Ass> FUCK!!!! MY MUM BUSTED ME LOOKING AT THE
  GOATSE GUY!
  <CoMPLeX> and u were looking at it becoz....
  <My`Albanian`Ass> leave me alone, my mum's looking at me
  funny, brb talking.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907105
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.659374
text:
  <astrix> theres a little clip on the side of your drive
  <@KiNgDeeM|AFKish> jumpers
  <astrix> theres 3 options, master, slave and something else
  <@KiNgDeeM|AFKish> cable select
  <@Cyan> master, slave, and "likes to watch"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907106
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.659423
text:
  <+nH|BradGTS> canada is like a loft apartment above a really
  good party
  <@TnH|Chick> yeah it is brad, and they're always bitchin


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907106
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.659470
text:
  <kyourek> KEEEEEEEEEEEEEIIIIIIIIAAAAAAAAAAAAAEEEEEEEEEE!!
  <DrWoody> ... What?
  <kyourek> Just practicing my karate.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907106
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.659524
text:
  <+FlatFace> ASDFHK
  <+FlatFace> WTF
  <+FlatFace> WOLF 3D SOURCE 8K?!
  <+FlatFace> wait that's the disclaimer
  <+FlatFace> SHIT


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907107
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.659574
text:
  Sushispook: so we're swapping out all these old pc's with
  newer ones
  Sushispook: and we're stacking them up in piles in the cube
  next to me
  Sushispook: and all the old ones have various notes on them,
  since some have been pillaged for parts
  Sushispook: i go into the cube to talk to the rentatech and
  see how he's doing, and i lean up against the cube
  Sushispook: and i end up walking out with one of those notes
  stuck to my ass
  Sushispook: and just try and guess what that note said
  Sushispook: NEEDS HARD DRIVE
  Sushispook: right on my ass


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907107
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.659643
text:
  <ErinJane78> I wouldn't ever piss in a men's room... have you
  SEEN them?
  <Blaxthos> yea... I usually try to contribute to the vileness
  <Blaxthos> i remember in middle school, at the gym
  <Blaxthos> i got in the habit of going into the men's room and
  pissing on the toilet paper
  <Blaxthos> after a few rounds the P.E. coaches put the men's
  room on 24 hr lockdown
  <Blaxthos> so i took to pissing in P.E. lockers during classes
  <Blaxthos> they tried like hell to catch me, but i was too
  slick
  <Blaxthos> so they finally got tired of it and re-opened the
  men's room
  <Blaxthos> so i could return to pissin on the paper towels/
  asswipe


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907107
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.659697
text:
  <wecell> new apples look fairly interesting, but i'd hate to
  buy into something that is going to CRASH all the time.
  <DigDug> wecell : What are you using right now?
  <wecell> i've always used windows machines.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907108
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.659792
text:
  * Zapp is now known as Zapp|party
  <Zapp|party> see yall
  <Zapp|party> PARTY!!
  <Zapp|party> w00t
  <Zapp|party> drunk white woman for everybody!
  * Zapp|party has quit IRC (Quit: Zapp|party)
  <W-Cid> busy girl ;)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907109
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.659871
text:
  <Nori123> You don't know jack shit
  <VioletSky> That's not true, I know him well
  <Nori123> Haha
  <VioletSky> I'm serious
  <VioletSky> Jack is the son of Awe Schitt and O. Schitt. Awe
  Schitt, the fertilizer magnate, married O. Schitt, the owner
  of Needeep N. Schitt Inc. They had one son, Jack. In turn Jack
  Schitt married Noe Schitt, the deeply religious couple
  produced 6 children
  <VioletSky> Holie Schitt, Fulla Schitt, Giva Schitt, Bull
  Schitt, and the twins: Deap Schitt and Dip Schitt. Against her
  parents' objections, Deap Schitt married Dumb Schitt, a high
  school drop out.
  <VioletSky> However, after being married 15 years, Jack and
  Noe Schitt divorced. Noe Schitt later remarried Ted Sherlock
  and, because her kids were living with them, she wanted to
  keep her previous name.
  <VioletSky> She was then known as Noe Schitt-Sherlock.
  Meanwhile, Dip Schitt married Loda Schitt and they produced a
  son of nervous disposition, Chicken Schitt.
  <VioletSky> Two other of the 6 children, Fulla Schitt and Giva
  Schitt, were inseparable throughout childhood and subsequently
  married the Happens brothers in a dual ceremony.
  <VioletSky> The wedding announcement in the newspaper
  announced the Schitt-Happens wedding. The Schitt-Happens
  children were Dawg, Byrd, and Hoarse.
  <VioletSky> Bull Schitt, the prodigal son, left home to tour
  the world. He recently returned from Italy with his new
  Italian bride, Pisa Schitt.
  <VioletSky> So there.
  <FiPo> LOL
  <Nori123> I have actually chortled coke through my nose


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907110
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.659924
text:
  -ChanServ- (#help) >>>READ THIS<<< AUTH INSTRUCTIONS: /msg
  authserv@services.gamesnet.net auth <handle> <password>
  <Hk> Plz... How do I auth with chanserv?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907110
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.659989
text:
  <Punk-In-Drublic> THE FOLLOWING PEOPLE SUCK COCK ...Mousey,
  Dave, Vas, Belindah..........YALL CAN GAT FUCKED COS IM DRUNK
  WOOOOOOOOO ......BOOBIES WOOOOOOOOOO'
  <Mousey> why am i first
  <Mousey> thats really insulting
  <vas-deferens> because your the best at iut
  <mk4> why am i second ?
  <vas-deferens> shit im third
  <vas-deferens> i better work on my technique
  <vas-deferens> at least im beating a chick
  <Mousey> hahahah


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907110
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.660098
text:
  <Malagmyr> This linguistics professor was lecturing the class.
  <Malagmyr> "In English," he explained, "a double negative
  forms a positive. In some languages, such as Russian, a double
  negative is still a negative."
  <Malagmyr> "However," the professor continued, "there is no
  language wherein a double positive can form a negative."
  <Malagmyr> Immediately, a voice from the back of the room
  piped up: "Yeah..... right...."


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907111
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.660145
text:
  <nastsmom> this place looks like a ghost town
  <Espresso> try changing the colors of your client so it looks
  like hawaii or somethign


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907111
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.660218
text:
  <@martini> my weed dealer, was drunk last night
  <@martini> and she started feeling me up
  <@rommel> lol
  <@rommel> did you advance?
  <@martini> i said "call me when you sober up"
  <@rommel> aw, you weren't lookin for some butt that night?
  <@martini> not at that very moment
  <@martini> shit was crazy
  <@martini> too many things going on at once
  <@kvm> u were chewing gum then?
  <@martini> har har
  <@rommel> HAHAHAHA
  <@rommel> owned.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907111
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.660334
text:
  <Hyperian> ono pike * Hyperian kills pike
  <Hyperian> found an article about pikes
  <Hyperian> "invasive northern pike just won't die"
  <pike|zZz> MOUHAHAHA!
  <Hyperian> "pike could devastate fisheries"
  <pike|zZz> MOUHAHAHAAH!
  <Hyperian> "despite being poisoned, shocked, netted, hooked,
  and blown up, the nonative northern pike remains stronger than
  ever in Lake Davis."
  * Hyperian shocks and poisons pike
  <pike|zZz> BWAHAHA
  <pike|zZz> YOU CANNOT GET RID OF THE PIKE!
  * pike|zZz was kicked by Dyn|work (Dyn|work)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907112
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.660381
text:
  <Lint> too bad the onion wont be allowed to print under
  martial law.
  <Spam_Man> is that where ninjas patrol the streets?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907112
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.660429
text:
  <Evasion> they say astroglide doesn't get sticky for hours,
  thats bs, it gets sticky in 5-10 minutes
  <aNuBiS-> Evasion: you arent supposed to mix it with feces


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907112
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.660494
text:
  <Maky> Women do:
  <Maky> - Piercings in the strangest places
  <Maky> - Tatoos everywhere
  <Maky> - Face liftings
  <Maky> - Cesarian Birth
  <Maky> - Liposuction
  <Maky> - Chirurgial reduction of the abdomen.
  <Maky> - Plucking of facial hair and eyebrows
  <Maky> - Depilation with hot wax
  <Maky> SO HOW CAN THEY DARE TO TELL YOU "IT HURTS" WHEN YOU
  ASK FOR SOME ANAL SEX?!?!?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907113
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.660586
text:
  <osx5>    question is there an irc server that has mostly mac
  users on it?
  <Eulogy>  i hope to god not.
  <osx5>    lol, why
  <Eulogy>  that much arrogance would cause the universe to
  collapse on itself.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907113
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.660659
text:
  <stormo> im watching the best movie atm..
  <Aurian> why is it so good??
  <stormo> any film where a clown fingerfucks a nun has got to
  be good
  <Aurian> okay, i now consider myself lucky for not watching it
  <Aurian> isn't it meant to be about ninjas???
  <stormo> now they're having actual sex
  <stormo> yeah
  <stormo> the nun is a ninja in disguise
  <Aurian> ahh
  <Aurian> and who's the clown?
  <stormo> another ninja
  <stormo> look, i'm not watching this film for it's complex and
  involved plot


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907113
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.660713
text:
  <kisama> these penguin mints are weak
  <Guilty> Snow you're in college now, you need amphetamines
  <Guilty> No weak caffeine mints


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907114
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.660858
text:
  <tate> Ever see What Women Want?
  <Tony> yea, i look in the mirror all the time
  <tate> It's true
  <tate> Women do only seem to want Gay men


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907115
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.660905
text:
  <Spengler> you know what?
  <Spengler> the matrix would have made a really shit movie if
  he took the blue pill.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907115
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.660969
text:
  <Kazz> I like how Unreal Tournament is way better than Unreal.
  <Kazz> Like how Casablanca Tournament was better than
  Casablanca.
  <Random-Guy> "In all the servers in all the clans...she had to
  join mine."
  <Kazz> "Frag the usual suspects."
  <SoulBain> "Damnit, you can flag cap for her you can do it for
  me."
  <Kazz> "I am shocked, SHOCKED to find that camping is going on
  in this casino!"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907115
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.661087
text:
  <DarthN> so.. ana... did she touch your... "railgun"?
  <ana_class> dude
  <ana_class> seriously stfu
  <faustwork> lol
  <faustwork> did you shoot plasma?
  <DarthN> HAHAHAHA
  <DarthN> ROFL
  <chaoworky> haha
  <DarthN> omg hahaha
  <ana_class> are you all in second grade still?
  <chaoworky> i think he fisted her with his gauntlet
  <DarthN> omg


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907116
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.661172
text:
  <Jerec> I bent my glasses =/
  <Reykemias> lol
  <Jerec> I need new ones anyways
  <Lady_Sharlintier> you are supposed to take them off during
  sex Jerec
  <Jerec> What is the fun in that! then I can't see you !
  <Lady_Sharlintier> what you can't see you can always feel...
  besides if you are seeing or feeling me it must be in your
  dreams cuz you are a lil far away for anything else
  <Jerec> hehe
  <Jerec> :P
  <Lady_Sharlintier> hey only show me your tongue if you intend
  to use it
  * Jerec takes Lady_Sharlintier into a private room
  <Lady_Sharlintier> LOL
  * Lady_Sharlintier stuffs Jerec back into his pod... not done
  yet
  * Jerec sulks inside his pod
  <Lady_Sharlintier> I think you need to hibernate for awhile
  longer :)
  <Jerec> why so?
  <Lady_Sharlintier> Age a few more years :)
  <Duloth> Note: While hibernating, you will age more slowly
  than her.
  <Lady_Sharlintier> yeah and when he comes out I will be on
  geritol
  <Jerec> how about i put you  In the pod?:)
  <Lady_Sharlintier> I'm strange enough without being a pod
  person :)
  <Jerec> aww come on :D


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907116
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.661288
text:
  <reptile-> i like to masturbate
  <reptile-> heh
  <reptile-> I remember along time ago
  <reptile-> when I was like 8 er smthn
  <reptile-> my friend was like, "Gay people masturbate." or
  something
  <reptile-> and I was like, "ew.. I'm never doing that!"
  <reptile-> !#@$


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907117
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.661344
text:
  <Mak0> history class was hilarious today
  <Mak0> teacher asks "can anyone name a law put into effect by
  a president that they dont agree with?"
  <Mak0> my response: "the Emancipation Proclamation"
  <Mak0> its ok though, its a honors class so of course no black
  people are in it


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907117
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.661494
text:
  <Galoot> Jesus! Stupid kids. It's always "Daddy, please spend
  time with us. Daddy, we love you. Daddy, Daddy, Daddy!" Don't
  they realize I'm in a chatroom?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907117
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.661556
text:
  <NekkidRisu> Oh wow
  <Snakerboy> what?
  <NekkidRisu> That's the first time I've fully shaved my
  nutsack, and by fucking god does it feel so cool.
  <NekkidRisu> Err
  <NekkidRisu> Shit
  <NekkidRisu> You shouldn't have seen that. Just like, imagine
  it's not there or something


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907118
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.661641
text:
  .!. @Risiken wonders where her cam is being hosted =\
  .!. BoHolbrook wonders where his balls are being hosted
  ( Psy ) [BoHolbrook]: www.tiny.com


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907118
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.661714
text:
  <TwiggYGoD> you have all the movies in .rm format, dont you?
  <Hiroechan> rm blows goats
  <Hiroechan> you don't want it
  <TwiggYGoD> yes i do
  <TwiggYGoD> it's the smallest format
  <TwiggYGoD> and if i want it different, i'll use a converter
  <TwiggYGoD> but i myself, PREFER rm
  <Hiroechan> you *PREFER* Rm?
  <TwiggYGoD> yes
  <TwiggYGoD> best visual quality i've seen yet
  <Hiroechan> okay, now this is some funny shit
  <TwiggYGoD> i hate avi and asf and mpg
  <Hiroechan> do you use a Mac?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907118
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.661761
text:
  <semi> ThePikmin: oh yeah? well i can increase my penis size
  up to 3 full inches!
  <ThePikmin> my penis size is already 3 full inches


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907119
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.661845
text:
  (@Ti-chan) Bukkake is when a Mommy and a Daddy and a Daddy and
  a Daddy and a Daddy and a Daddy and a Daddy all decide that
  Mommy needs some special facial moisturiser


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907119
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.661899
text:
  <RighteousSuicide> I was running around today like a retard
  <RighteousSuicide> and I hear a BANG
  <RighteousSuicide> i couldn't figure out what it was
  <RighteousSuicide> then I noticed I had run into a dumpster


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907120
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.661959
text:
  Unregistered> I think shes finally lost it...she sitting in
  the corner going *beep* *beep* and pretending shes a computer
  in the hope I will pay attention to her....


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907120
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.662079
text:
  <j4yj0hn> oh, a kid in my class got called to the office for
  stalking a girl
  <Threeboy> strange kids.
  <j4yj0hn> she caught him in her yard with a camera
  <Threeboy> just say it was a project.
  <Threeboy> unless he was naked.
  <Threeboy> then say it was an ART project.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907121
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.662171
text:
  <BlackDeth> Now playing: Right Hand - Gripping my penis (and
  moving up and down (2001)) @ 192 strokes per second. (0:13/
  0:27)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907121
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.662217
text:
  <tumnus> i just set my clock the easiest way ever
  <tumnus> i waited until it was midnight then i plugged it in
  and left it


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907121
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.662263
text:
  <CrazyDe> some dude on ebay is threatening to sue me for
  copyright infringement
  <Guilty> Did you claim to be the Real Slim Shady?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907122
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.662309
text:
  <noam`wm> I was studying Physics, right. Magnetic fields.
  There was a drawing in the book to demonstrate how the
  direction of the field is always orthogonal to the direction
  of the force. to do that, they drew a dot, 4 vectors of field
  and 4 directions of force, orthogonal to them.
  <noam`wm> I painted the background in red and added SIEG HEIL.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907122
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.662359
text:
  <T-Girth> that girl kept me up all night long <G>
  <T-Girth> of course it was just cuz she wouldn't shut her trap
  while i was tryin to sleep


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907122
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.662415
text:
  <xjeff> its better that u dont
  * Orca hands xjeff a strange grammatical device...called...an
  APOSTROPHE!
  <xjeff> ,,,,,,,,,,,,
  <Orca> Pardner, that's known as a "comma" in this here parts.
  <xjeff> excuse me for not having extreme intellagence
  <Orca> Sorry, I guess I just expect at least basic grammatical
  skills out of people.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907122
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.662483
text:
  <Kyou|awaying> omfg i almost had a heart attack
  <Kyou|awaying> I FUCKING HATE STUPID ADS WITH SOUND >_<
  <HKR|Paper> LOL
  <HKR|Paper> Especially if it's a pr0n add, and your speakers
  are cranked and your parents are in the room next door
  <Kyou|awaying> my speakers are always cranked =
  <HKR|Paper> They suddenly hear "AH AH AH!"
  <HKR|Paper> "WTF IS THAT?!" they yell
  <HKR|Paper> Uh...my brothers rap cd's.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907123
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.662533
text:
  <Nickster> Time for me to make some breakfast! :)
  <Nickster> Is anyone from England? I have a question.
  <Speck> Im from England and if your asking about english
  muffins Ill kick you.
  <Nickster> nvm then.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907123
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.662581
text:
  <sexy_westie> lmao. . . . . reminds me of a childhood story
  <sexy_westie> my grandmother bought my mother (10yrs old at
  time) a chihuahua pup (cost a bomb apparently) only for the
  cat to eat it in the first day lmao
  <sexy_westie> must have thought it was a yapping rat


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907123
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.662628
text:
  <Wikkid|Mikkr3igN> my power went out the other day. good thing
  my camera had a flash. i went to make a sandwich and took 90
  pictures of my kitchen.... the neighbors called the police
  they thought it was lightening in my house


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907124
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.662681
text:
  <carkeys> arpad you there?
  <Meritt> That's the first time I've seen car keys go looking
  for their owner.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907124
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.662727
text:
  <mindstorms> i so l33t.....i combined my radio and computer
  output to my speakers
  <mindstorms> so now my head hurts when i have the radio and
  winamp on!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907124
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.662776
text:
  <thenanny> What do you say when you wake up in the middle of
  the night and see your TV floating across the room?
  <thenanny> Drop it nigger!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907124
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.662829
text:
  [:: The_Brain] --> ppp9-2.aquanet.co.il
  [:: riksta] --> leet dialup
  [:: riksta] --> i feer u
  [:: The_Brain] --> its a vhost that makes you *think* its a
  dialup
  [:: The_Brain] --> its actually an oc-48
  [:: riksta] --> oc48 in isreal dont make me laugh
  [:: riksta] --> u barely got electricity


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907125
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.662881
text:
  <@j0nkatz> jwbozzy: I have an audi out port on my cd player in
  my car.
  <@j0nkatz> audio
  <nukle> heh.
  <nukle> fordian slip.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907125
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.662929
text:
  <cj_> welp, that was fun.  back to irc.
  <cj_> i managed to add a quart of oil to my car before losing
  interest in RL.
  <cj_> cs?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907125
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.662983
text:
  <jamesf> go to work, put your jacket over your chair and a cup
  of coffee next to your keyboard, then go home
  <jamesf> everyone will think you're in a meeting
  <jamesf> turn up again at 4, do an hour's work and then go
  home again
  <jamesf> no-one will be any the wiser


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907126
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.663044
text:
  <drbngrl> hi
  <LordCow> yo
  <fppe> hello there girl
  <fppe> what happened to your vowels
  <LordCow> cost saving
  <drbngrl> what vowels
  <LordCow> exactly
  <fppe> she had a vowel movement
  <drbngrl> what are yoll talking about


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907126
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.663086
text:
  `rush» pokemon stadium is so tight
  «@ Alp|nE» pokemon is fucking gay.
  «`rush» :(
  «`rush» i know
  «`rush» save me


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907126
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.663141
text:
  <Rann-chan> 0123.
  <Rann-chan> Er, sorry. ^^;
  <Reddjango> at least we know you can count to 3 ^_^
  <Gary> And like a C programmer, too. :)
  <Rann-chan> Of course I can. That's the number of guys a girl
  can take without using her hands, right? n.n


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907126
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.663193
text:
  <irving> i do stuff like set up my garage door to open over
  the internet
  <MyPetGoat> having an internet-enabled garage door? what that
  fuck is that good for?
  <MyPetGoat> it's like you're the most pathetic Bond villain
  ever


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907127
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.663250
text:
  fallouswk > bwahahahaha.  coworker comes in with a problem,
  gets halfway into the explanation and then pauses and says
  "umm, it smells like you've been farting in here"  "yes, I
  have"  "I'm going to leave now"  "I think that would be best"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907127
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.663310
text:
  <Jake> Caffeine and I are getting along well today.
  <Nismorack> Didn't you break up?
  <Jake> We talked it over
  <Storm> how the hell could you break up with caffeine?
  <Storm> that's just insanity
  <Jake> I already have to deal with transient insomnia
  <Jake> Caffeine just compounds the issue.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907127
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.663356
text:
  <+COokie|DLingZELDAmusic> damnit theres just not enough fat
  girl pron on kazaa
  <+COokie|DLingZELDAmusic> i mean..zelda music...


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907128
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.663417
text:
  <outcaste> costume party tip #417 - If you forget to pick up a
  costume, just turn up in your underwear. If someone asks you
  what you've arrived as, just say "premature ejaculation - I
  came in my underwear".
  <sara> oh god that's awful
  <outcaste> yes, yes it is
  <jimmie> what a great idea
  ð jimmie/#hades makes notes
  <outcaste> or...wear a condom on your nose, when people ask
  you what you are, just say "fuck knows"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907128
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.663469
text:
  « Matt » I made 10 bucks from a friend at work.
  « Matt » "Go to the next girl going to change and ask to watch
  her and I'll give you five bucks. Ten if she hits you."
  « Matt » Me - "50 if she kicks me in the balls."
  « Matt » "Deal"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907128
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.663533
text:
  <PyRo_ZaCh> i think i gota try sellin weed or something
  <KeLLy`R> i'll buy some!
  <PyRo_ZaCh> u got a heat lamp i could borrow?
  <KeLLy`R> no sorry
  <PyRo_ZaCh> hrmmmmmmm
  <PyRo_ZaCh> i need that first
  <PyRo_ZaCh> i got it planed so if i would  no one could find
  <PyRo_ZaCh> but i need a heat lamp
  <PyRo_ZaCh> and a rabbit
  <PyRo_ZaCh> and some sort of hover craft


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907129
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.663633
text:
  <ProfBahddins> ... . ... . ....... . . ... .. .........  .....
  .. ...... .. .
  <ProfBahddins> ... . ........ . .... ....... . ... .. ......
  <eruhu> ?
  <ProfBahddins> i'm talking to my blind friend.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907129
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.663757
text:
  <akii> what happens when disney goes bankrupt?
  <akii> does walt get unfrozen?
  <nigd> haahha
  <nigd> how pissed would you be
  <nigd> "IM ALIVE!"
  <nigd> "yes"
  <nigd> "Did you cure me?"
  <nigd> "no"
  <nigd> "Why unfreeze me then?"
  <nigd> "You're going broke"
  <nigd> "fuck."


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907130
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.663806
text:
  <imminent> clean keyboard
  <imminent> yesss
  <edible> you desemenized it?
  <edible> let some cum hungry slut lick the shit out of your
  keyboard?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907130
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.663862
text:
  <oc3-spd> no way dude my system is so much better than yours
  it owns yours and is faster.
  <Hrrrrm> Ok show ur info.
  <oc3-spd> os[Windows 2000 Professional (5.0 - 2195)] uptime[1h
  22m 6s] cpu[2-AMD AthlonMP, 1635MHz, 256KB] mem[Usage: 380/
  3072MB (87.33%) [|---------]]
  <Hrrrrm> you forgot to change the % on the ram.
  <oc3-spd> os[Windows 2000 Professional (5.0 - 2195)] uptime[1h
  22m 6s] cpu[2-AMD AthlonMP, 1635MHz, 256KB] mem[Usage: 380/
  3072MB (12.36%) [|---------]]
  <Hrrrrm> damn youre right... its better :(


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907130
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.663914
text:
  <phatmike> wtf
  <phatmike> i dont drink that much
  <phatmike> wow
  <phatmike> this coffee tastes weird
  <phatmike> without the whiskey in it


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907130
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.663961
text:
  *** Armagon has quit IRC (Quit: [07:45pm] ·Dide_Bot· I last
  saw Bel's ass, I think it got sold on ebay 2 weeks 2 days 3
  hours 37 minutes 55 seconds ago.)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907131
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.664039
text:
  <MeKa> [11:54] <Neji-Sama> I have a *nix os.
  <MeKa> [11:54] <Neji-Sama> Several.
  <MeKa> [11:54] <Cidsa> hurray
  <MeKa> [11:54] <Cidsa> next is
  <MeKa> [11:54] <MeKa> linux?
  <MeKa> [11:54] <Neji-Sama> RH 9, Mandrake 9, Debian, Slackware
  and Gentoo.
  <MeKa> dont call me an idiot if you didnt answer  before I
  asked the question
  <MeKa> DOLT:P
  > Uh' dude.
  > They're different flavours of Linux.
  > Sort of like Microsoft is a flavour of being ass raped by a
  dead turkey.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907131
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.664087
text:
  TheLegendofMouse> You know when you drive by those amusement
  parks, sometimes they have those slides shaped like the
  titanic?
  TsunamiNoAi> Thats kind of macabre isnt it?
  TheLegendofMouse> Let me find a picture of one
  TsunamiNoAi> does this mean in 100 years there will be a WTC:
  The Ride bungee jumping?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907132
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.664177
text:
  <oz> DYKQUIL - YOUR RUBBING, LICKING, GRABBING, POKING,
  TEASING, TONGUING, SO YOU CAN GO ALL NITE MEDICINE


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907132
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.664239
text:
  <+SAB3> Wow, cool site
  <RiPPeRke> the version that is running local is much better
  <+SAB3> Give me the url
  <RiPPeRke> http://localhost/alpha/news.php
  <+SAB3> Doesn't work
  <RiPPeRke> It works fine over here
  <+SAB3> no dude, it doesn't work ...


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907132
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.664291
text:
  <Trivbot0> What is South Korea's national dish called?
  <Logic_BomB> rats
  <Logic_BomB> rice
  <Logic_BomB> children


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907133
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.664343
text:
  <ILikeBush> its sad though, to see so many blind eyes.  Jesus'
  light is greater than anything you'll ever find here on Earth.
  <Proz> Well I met Jesus, he made me a taco.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907133
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.664395
text:
  <Raspberry> I'm a "Businessman" i work for myself -- I do not
  sit in my parents basement and drink mountain dew all day
  while beating off to Princess Leah during the Jabba the Hutt
  scenes -- so I really don't relate to most "linux geeks"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907133
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.664491
text:
  <Basketcase> There was a swarm of lesbians at my school
  today...
  <Basketcase> they were gonna eat me out alive...


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907136
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.664641
text:
  <kRadD3ViL> fUk1n n0n-31337 h4x0rz! t4lk l1k3 n00bZ!!!!
  <evildewr> hey, i used to speek like that.. but it don't make
  you leet with women
  <kRadD3ViL> WhY u s4y d4t n00b?
  <evildewr> cuz my girlfriend dumped me for using numbers when
  we communicated
  <kRadD3ViL> u h4d a g1rlfr13nd? fuk1ng 31337!!!!! g1rls s0und
  1337!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907136
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.664814
text:
  <Duck[STFUF]> you know ath, why did you change your name to
  avin...A, V, I and N are pretty much as farthest they can be
  from one another:<
  <Jumper|TMC> BECAUSE IT'S HIS NAME


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907137
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.664882
text:
  <BiZZY> GOD DAMNIT!
  <Strom> ?
  <BiZZY> only doctor close to me that will check me under title
  19 is my ex g/f's mom
  <Strom> ...so?
  <BiZZY> I know her really well
  <BiZZY> kind of odd, I'd be having my groin checked
  <Strom> i imagine that would make you more comfortable than
  having a stranger prod your groin
  <BiZZY> no I'd rather have someone I don't know that I won't
  probly see again do it
  <BiZZY> than someone whose daughter used to play with the same
  area


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907137
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.664934
text:
  <Timid-> MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP
  * Shockla has quit IRC (*.net *.split)
  * rooties-w has quit IRC (*.net *.split)
  * Mr_Hahn has quit IRC (*.net *.split)
  * rup\tek has quit IRC (*.net *.split)
  <wandarah> holy shit.
  <wandarah> truly your meep is a powerful weapon.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907138
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.665025
text:
  Bug> (That really happened to a friend of mine. Her pitbull
  used her friend's dildo as a rawhide bone..)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907138
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.665071
text:
  <mav> I've always wanted to change my legal name to ;DROP
  DATABASE; and see what kind of havoc ensues...


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907138
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.665130
text:
  <fudge> wow
  <fudge> i am blessed
  <fudge> ffx-2 AND an AOL 9.0 disc
  <ShinakuTK_> ...some one gave you a AOHELL disk for a crimbo
  present?
  <fudge> i doubt it's a xmas present
  <fudge> i just get them all year then give them away at
  halloween to the kiddies
  <ShinakuTK_> lol


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907139
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.665182
text:
  <Kai-jin> violence is always an answer
  <Aan|trigu> ah..no
  <Aan|trigu> :P
  <Kai-jin> yes it is..it may not the *the* answer...but it is
  always *an* answer
  <Aan|trigu> well so is bestiality


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907139
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.665235
text:
  <DumbCatgirlSexSlave> no.  must slay Willian Shatner.
  <DumbCatgirlSexSlave> ... his name is "Shatner".  this never
  struck me as funny before but it does now.
  <Tomko> william scatner
  <Tomko> spock: your feces is ILLOGICALLY DELICIOUS


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907139
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.665276
text:
  (bovril): food escapes me
  (nark): it ran away?
  (nark): try killing it before you eat it sam
  (bovril): its nicer fresh


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907139
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.665333
text:
  <jasn> dad woke me up like 'your brother cut himself with a
  knife he's bleeding everywhere i gotta take him to the
  hospital'
  <jasn> im like  'can you get me some mcdonalds breakfast'


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907140
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.665430
text:
  * Teufel is a moron
  <_wEaSeL_> well said
  <Teufel> I tore up my room looking for the receipt for my
  'broken speakers' to return them; when all I had to do is plug
  them in


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907140
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.665477
text:
  <dunn> why am i sometimes online, and sometimes not online
  <uno> are you getting philosophical on us dunn?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907141
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.665540
text:
  <Alberto> Fucking women.
  <Mouse> You know what else I hate?
  <Alberto> Asians?
  <Reverend> Me?
  <Mouse> No, no.
  <Mouse> Think on a wider scale.
  <Alberto> Asians AND Rev?
  <Reverend> Two of me?
  <Mouse> The answer is everything.
  <Alberto> Ah. You walking cliche.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907141
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.665682
text:
  <Green> So I got in my car
  <Green> and there was birdshit on my windsheild
  <Green> so i got a paper towel and got out to wipe it off
  <Green> but it wouldn't come off
  <Green> and thats when I realized it was on the INSIDE
  <Green> I had a hard time getting to sleep that night


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907142
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.665733
text:
  <JD> AFAIK, Anubis is the only Egyptian god who is often drawn
  with an
  erect penis.
  <JD> Really!
  DigiGnðme> I thought they all were.
  DigiGnðme> Oh no, that's the Kama Sutra.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907142
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.665907
text:
  <_ry0suke_> CRANK DOESN'T KNOW ANYTHING
  <VgameT> I'VE BEEN NOTICING THAT RECENTLY
  <craNKGod> RYO I KNOW A LOT OF STUFF
  <craNKGod> GO AHEAD
  <craNKGod> ASK ME
  <VgameT> CRANKGOD WHAT'S THE LAST DIGIT OF THE IP
  REPRESENTATION OF A /28 NETMASK
  <VgameT> IN DECIMAL
  <nondescript> DASH OFF TO GOOGLE, BEFORE ANYONE GETS
  SUSPICIOUS THAT YOU DON'T KNOW!
  <craNKGod> 0
  <VgameT> AS YOU CAN SEE
  <VgameT> CRANK ONLY KNOWS TOTALLY USELESS SHIT
  <craNKGod> WHAT'S GOOGLE


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907143
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.665949
text:
  (bigwurm) if your concerned about the ammount of cpu time an
  onboard sound card uses, you should really get a new cpu +
  mobo
  (@|-ZenitH-|) or a life


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907143
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.665995
text:
  <vrit> oh god damn, that beer just suddenly snuck up on my
  bladder all special-ops style
  <vrit> it was all metal beer solid


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907143
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.666090
text:
  <G-Nat> i love the graffiti in the physics toilets at uni
  <G-Nat> a physics student wrote "Arts Degree Dispenser" on the
  toilet paper dispenser


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907144
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.666148
text:
  <meta> blegh
  <meta> the internet is bad
  <meta> bad bad bad
  <meta> I tried to talk to a woman
  <meta> but she sent me nude pics instead
  <meta> I didn't want them
  <meta> but I took them out of courtesy


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907144
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.666199
text:
  <Ma[N]da> he wont shut up about my mum
  <Ma[N]da> i swear i wannna kiss him
  <My`Albanian`Ass> kiss him?
  <Ma[N]da> oh my god
  <Ma[N]da> i mean kill him


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907144
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.666349
text:
  <Kuroko> Hey...I need to ask you guys something.
  <Kuroko> Sleep or Trigun?
  <CrackPr0n-E> masturbation -=X
  <CrackPr0n-E> c. masturbation </= that's where it's at
  <Kuroko> i'm not male.
  <CrackPr0n-E> girls can masturbate too
  <SPOONwork> Kuroko: what, women don't masturbate? lies
  <CrackPr0n-E> spoon:she's 12
  <SPOONwork> CrackPr0n-EET-NoPants: it's not stopping you. :P
  <CrackPr0n-E> what does stop me?
  <Kuroko> my mum also has a lovely habit of checking on
  everyone late at night.
  * Yukanojo thinks this conversation falls under the category
  of "Reasons Parents Keep Kids Off the Internet"
  <CrackPr0n-E> Kuroko:that's what locks are for
  <Kuroko> trigun i can explain. irc i can explain.
  but...yeah...
  <Kuroko> Crack: she has the keys.
  <CrackPr0n-E> or "I had an itch... that's all"
  <Yukanojo> hahahaha
  <CrackPr0n-E> psssh, while she's unlocking the door, pull your
  panties up
  * Smugami wonders what he's stumbled into ... o.O
  <CrackPr0n-E> and just sit in a blanket
  <Kuroko> ...
  * Kuroko will spend the entire night trying to erase this
  conversation from her memory
  <Kuroko> Thanks for helping me decide.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907145
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.666399
text:
  <Gudrow> I hope I get hired
  <jre> wear a miniskirt to the interview
  <jre> show some leg and some nutsack


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907145
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.666447
text:
  <Trauma> craig: cracked rib and torn cartiledge and 1800mg of
  ibprofen in the last 5 hours
  <utahsaint> damn dood what happened?
  <utahsaint> i told you not to jack off on the roof


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907146
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.666535
text:
  Garby: I just have to find a crafty way to avoid them on
  Monday.
  Pollerskates: Wear a Madeleine McCann Halloween costume.
  Pollerskates: They'll never be able to find you.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907146
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.666583
text:
  <epix> my mom said she wasn't afraid of me having sex, she
  said quote," No one would want you to fuck them anyway"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907146
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.666678
text:
  <falc> i now declare 'oat' to mean 'on another topic', please
  update your geeky brains immediately


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907147
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.666736
text:
  <Eddo36> sometimes I feel like shit, you know, what sick shit
  I get off to. but I can't change
  <Littlelisa> You know eddo, if you never said anything, people
  may like you
  <Eddo36> if i never said anything, who would know me?
  <Littlelisa> thats the point


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907147
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.666828
text:
  *** julia_roberts was kicked by neotek (banned: spamming)
  <@neotek> who would have thought that a successful actress
  like julia roberts would stoop to spamming her "phat pic site"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907148
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.666878
text:
  [anakin] man i love microsoft visio
  [Bayls] yeah, and thanks for answering my question about it
  earlier. :)
  [anakin] what question did you have?
  [Bayls] how well does it sniff out your network and give you a
  diagram with Ipaddresses etc?
  [Bayls] is it visio enterprise?
  [anakin] not sure, i havent tried it yet
  [anakin] na i only have professional
  [Bayls] It should say it on the box. if it says "enterprise",
  it's the enterpr.... ooooh, there IS NO BOX, is there? :)
  [anakin] does error checking etc too for ERD, data flow,
  structure charts, etc too
  [Bayls] sensational!
  [annie] you have NO idea what he just said, do you bayls? ;)
  [anakin] even gives you an output box at the bottom telling
  you any errors as you go along ... like a compiler .. heh
  [Bayls] yeah, he said it's got a spell checker or something in
  it.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907148
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.666935
text:
  <bbl-away> sheeesh sickjay, ease up on the #eos spam
  <CactusJac> don't talk to him that way
  <CactusJac> he's my boyfriend
  <bbl-away> well, take him and get a room
  <CactusJac> we're exhibitionists


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907148
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.666979
text:
  Jakefeb3: do you know a turtles only weakness?
  AvatarOfSolusek: no
  AvatarOfSolusek: well
  AvatarOfSolusek: thier slowness
  Jakefeb3: there weakness is they cant roll over when they are
  on their backs
  AvatarOfSolusek: lol
  Jakefeb3: now i have a plan
  Jakefeb3: if i duck tape 2 turtles together they are
  unstoppable


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907149
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.667083
text:
  <My`Albanian`Ass> dude, a fat chick from mcdonals brought me
  my food and she said 'sorry for the wait' and i said 'don't
  worry you'll lose it' and she gave me a smirk :/


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907149
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.667128
text:
  ( Webmaster ) I'm researching cheats for my webpage in counter
  strike anyone that knows how to use them, plz msg me.
  ( jeremy ) i know how to use the ejaculator3.45 cheat
  ( +Webmaster ) what does it do?
  ( +Webmaster ) and how do i use it
  ( +jeremy ) it turns everyone bright white


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907149
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.667232
text:
  * Bassfiend flicks to "The Avengers" for a bit of Uma...
  < planetWayne> nah - shes a bit ... ugly..
  < planetWayne> although I liked killbill#
  * Bassfiend doesn't want to talk to planetWayne ever again.
  < Bassfiend> Uma is my love!!!
  < planetWayne> her eyes are not set properly.
  < Bassfiend> Correct ...
  < Bassfiend> ... they should be four inches above the level of
  my penis.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907150
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.667278
text:
  <trollusk_zzz> ha ha slip
  <trollusk_zzz> i have two quotes on bash and what do you have?
  a hot girlfriend and a promising sports career! SUCKER


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907150
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.667339
text:
  <Wonderland> uhoh.   <Gayo> ?   <Wonderland> i seem to have
  glued 2 of my fingertips together with superglue
  <Wonderland> like..seriously.   <Wonderland> i cant get them
  apart   <Wonderland> OW   <Wonderland> nm   <Wonderland> ican


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907151
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.667431
text:
  <cryme> that would own
  <cryme> to jack off of the empire state
  <cryme> and see who gets killed by your cumshot


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907151
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.667526
text:
  < GrandTheft> What would be an example of an iptables rule
  that would allow anything and everything to come into the
  computer?
  < tewmten> ehm.. iptables -f perhaps?
  < GrandTheft> hmm let me try that
  | GrandTheft [Grand@68.16.40.90] quit #slackware [Read error:
  104 (Connection reset by peer)]


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907151
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.667574
text:
  <whifflebat2000> Holy crap... this is incredible. Never played
  this level. Great atmosphere.
  <Seppel> Whiff: Finally make it to level 3 on Super Mario
  Brothers?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907152
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.667686
text:
  <ReDy[CPH]> i remember once upon a time when i had dailup, i
  still remember the nightmares that modem brought, the times i
  just sat and stared at the screen downloading a 10 mb demo and
  the download time said 250hr 56m 16s download time increasing
  instead of decreasing, the frustration of never being able to
  open a homepage whitout waiting an hour, these things, 56kbit,
  it was this that made me who i am today a crazy leecher!
  <Razor2k3> i refuse to read all that
  <Cloud02> i remember once upon a time when i had dailup
  <Cloud02> i still remember the nightmares that modem brought
  <Razor2k3> nice
  <Cloud02> the times i just sat and stared at the screen
  downloading a 10 mb demo and the download time said 250hr 56m
  16s download time increasing instead of decreasing
  <Razor2k3> go on
  <Cloud02> the frustration of never being able to open a
  homepage whitout waiting an hour
  <Cloud02> these things, 56kbit
  <Cloud02> it was this that made me who i am today a crazy
  leecher!
  <Razor2k3> ty


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907152
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.667733
text:
  jac: "thats why asian guys can always go clubbing underage,
  they just borrow their dad's licence"
  flash: bahahahah that would so work
  nexx: er
  jac: lol
  nexx: asian people cant drive to get thier lisence anyway


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907153
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.667779
text:
  <DrBukkake> You know the world is going crazy when the best
  rapper is a white guy, the best golfer is a black guy, France
  is accusing the U.S. of arrogance and Germany doesn't want to
  go to war.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907153
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.667830
text:
  <Eticam> OMG!
  <Eticam> There's a mosquito the size of a monkey here!
  <Eticam> and it's eating my leg!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907154
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.667973
text:
  <Gayo> vecna was a swarthy pirate?   <McGrue> Indeed.
  <McGrue> He has to mark 'Other' on the census, and fills in
  "Pirate: Swarthy" in the supplied field.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907154
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.668071
text:
  <Asha`monkey> yeah, i put it in there real good huh you like
  that
  <p0tat03> ...
  <Asha`monkey> Oops.
  <Asha`monkey> Wrong window.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907154
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.668130
text:
  <winmutt> lol
  <winmutt> my neighbor's name is jeff toke
  <winmutt> and hes getting married tomorrow
  <winmutt> 4/20
  <winmutt> LOL
  <winmutt> i just realized this


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907155
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.668175
text:
  WarpdArchn: lots of christians don't go to church
  WarpdArchn: so they never have to meet the other people who
  believe the same things they do
  WarpdArchn: and therefore never have to lose faith in humanity


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907155
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.668232
text:
  <UKDJ|Planet> I swear to god
  <UKDJ|Planet> I've just heard a duck tell a joke
  <Jock> o...k
  <UKDJ|Planet> there was as group of ducks on a pond near where
  i live
  <UKDJ|Planet> one of the ducks was quacking away looking
  straight at a group of like 10 ducks
  <UKDJ|Planet> then he stopped and all the other ducks went
  mental
  <UKDJ|Planet> it looked just like duck stand-up comedy


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907155
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.668285
text:
  <NeoSmurf> So there I was waiting for my g/f, when I get a
  message from some chick wanting to cyber with me.
  <Merry> yeah...
  <NeoSmurf> I told her cybering is for losers and I didnt want
  to.
  <NeoSmurf> So she tells me to tell her what to do with her
  pussy.
  <NeoSmurf> I tell her to wash it, and she just quits talking.
  <Merry> LMFAO!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907156
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.668335
text:
  <wild> i'm black from the waist down
  <ryo-ohki> The lower half of your body smokes crack and
  doesn't work ??


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907156
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.668431
text:
  <_Hobbes|Stoned> I can't help but wonder if someday I'll look
  back on all of this and shudder to think that it's all logged


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907156
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.668486
text:
  (*)Embers(*): should i ask jonny this---
  (*)Embers(*): ok so i know we haven't known each other
  for long and I really shouldn't be asking you
  for
  this..... but I want it so bad don't get me
  wrong it's
  just that I haven't had it for a long time I
  could
  already feel it going in so hard and coming out
  so soft
  and wet. No one has to know about this, I'm
  desperate,
  but your help can be very grateful!!!
  (*)Embers(*): you must think I have a lot of nerve
  asking you for this but I can feel my tongue
  around it
  sucking all the juice out until there no more
  left, this
  has been on my mind all day long and I hope I'm
  not
  being forward but.... can I have a piece of gum?
  Sarah: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907157
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.668542
text:
  <Al> vasectomy is a foolish barbarism
  <Al> it would be completely unnecessary is men weren't so
  stupid to keep having sex with women
  <jre|away> It's not that.  The odd sperm cell can cling to air
  particles and accidentally get sucked into a passing vagina
  <Vodex> like an extraction fan but in reverse
  <Al> damn those vaginas, is there no depravity they will not
  commit


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907157
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.668605
text:
  <cix> they're outside aren't they?
  <s> what is "outside"?
  <cix> it's that place they show on "Discover"
  <cix> I think it's near Montana.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907157
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.668663
text:
  <Zimbu> heh, the ad bar on fark speaks for itself...
  <Zimbu> "1000s of naked women on your desktop! NSFW!: 18
  comments"
  <Zimbu> "Revenge Lady- My story of complete and utter
  humiliation: 8 comments"
  <Zimbu> "i saw a turtle: 1136 comments"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907158
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.668806
text:
  <Dreadnaut> i used to write poems about suicide and shit
  <KrON> i did poems about cheese and stuff


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907158
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.668853
text:
  scruss: a guy called us and complained because his dsl didn't
  work, come to find out he had win98 and actually took a knife
  and trimmed the rj45 connection to fit into the rj11 jack


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907159
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.668911
text:
  <Sock_Monkee> this "ska" band starts
  playing.....................
  <Sock_Monkee> like, they had
  guitar,bass,drums,tbone,trumpet,altosax,singer
  <Sock_Monkee> and the singer looked like avril labalifn;
  lawenflw;afinge
  <mog> girl?
  <ocean> lavigne, i think.
  <Wintermute> "labalifn;lawenflw;afinge"?
  <Wintermute> must be polish


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907160
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.668958
text:
  <scout> woohoo! the FORTRAN code works!
  * gus blinks
  <gus> dude, is it 1977 again and nobody told me ?
  <heliOx> lol


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907160
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.669003
text:
  <Zug_REAL_ULTIMATE_MM> Just about anything flicks his switch.
  However, it's not wired up to anything.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907161
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.669141
text:
  <Atrox> So there I was, hunched over Vorgen's dog. The car's
  grill kind of left this nice opening in it's abdomen, cause
  really, I wasn't about to fuck a dead dog in the ass, that's
  just wrong. Anyway, I was thrusting hard, and like hit
  something hard, I was all WTF, then realized I fucked through
  the dog and hit the cement. Was wierd.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907161
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.669194
text:
  <lordpie> Life sucks so much right now. It seems I'm spending
  all of it doing math.
  <Rosti_LFC> You are "Math Boy"
  <Rosti_LFC> Doer of math
  <Rosti_LFC> Unable to integrate with society. Only with
  functions of x


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907162
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.669246
text:
  <Sco0ter> kelly osbourne is hot
  <Eficent> i would hit it
  <Carface> I would hit it
  <Carface> In the face with a sledgehammer


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907162
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.669292
text:
  *** Nezzie (~armond@adsl-154-136-51.jan.bellsouth.net) has
  joined #phphelp
  <Nezzie> Wow they really need to put a warning label on that.
  <Nezzie> apparantly /sbin/fastboot should be called /sbin/
  fastREboot


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907163
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.669470
text:
  <Kanitaria> ugh codi has a penis injury right now and can't
  have sex or masturbate and hes gettin really fuckin bitchy lol
  <Kanitaria> plus hes not helping with any of the dishes or
  laundry this week cause im home he figures i'll do it all
  <Kanitaria> fml
  <random4t4x14> Kanitaria: what the hell did he do to his
  penis?
  <GCNinja> so that ^^^^^^^^^^
  <Gollom> Masturbated too hard?
  <GCNinja> dick punch?
  <Gollom> Tried to ride a bannister down the stairs but
  misjudged?
  <GCNinja> modify the cowboy position?
  <Gollom> Naked jumping jacks infront of a hungry dog?
  <random4t4x14> drunk masterbated, stood up and fell over on
  it?
  <GCNinja> did you staple it to his stomach?
  <random4t4x14> penacne?
  <Kanitaria> he did it to himself, i didn't do anything
  <GCNinja> mis alligned chisity belt?
  <GCNinja> chastity*
  <random4t4x14> vasectomy?
  <Kanitaria> he grabbed a shitty condom last week and it caused
  to much  much friction and he tore his frenulum then the other
  day he thought he was good to go and it made3 it worse
  <Gollom> Stuck it in a pencil sharpener "just to see what it's
  like"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907163
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.669516
text:
  <decifer> you should've seen the chicks clawing each other at
  the beach to get to me when they heard about my 231day uptime


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907163
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.669569
text:
  <Gin> Cocaine is white
  <Gin> Marijuana is green
  <Gin> So won't you please be
  <Gin> My drug lord queen
  <Gin> HAPPY VALENTINES DAY


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907164
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.669610
text:
  -SandNET- press, the like whole end, or are you just
  exagerating a big ass cut
  -SandNET- oops, just talked to 300 users


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907164
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.669663
text:
  <CraNKGod> YOU KNOW WHAT'LL BE NEAT ABOUT LIVING ON MY OWN
  <Funk> Being able to run up and down the hallway naked but for
  a sock on your erect penis?
  <CraNKGod> BEING ABLE TO DRINK STRAIGHT OUT OF THE MILK JUG
  <Funk> Oh.
  <Funk> Man, you need a better imagination.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907164
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.669757
text:
  <Deltantor> Why is it so hard to find a man that wants a
  female that has a small son?
  <f0rked_> I prefer a small daughter
  <grnp> I prefer a smaller son
  <ChrisHansen> I prefer that you both have a seat over there.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907165
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.669809
text:
  <RichiH> lilo: benjamin == fork(lilo) ?
  * lilo nods
  <lilo> he's a child process
  <lilo> eventually he'll have his own process group though


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907165
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.669859
text:
  <SirWolfgang> i just paid $85 for a hoodie...
  <tetsu> but it lasts for a decade right
  <tetsu> youll be 30 before you need to buy another hoodie
  <tetsu> and by then youll be an adult and just buy a coat


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907165
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.669902
text:
  aaront: :-P
  aaront: Whatever ya say
  xxkuku4purplexx: dont stick ur tongue out at me, are u like 2
  or something?
  aaront: you take emotiocons way too seriously <3
  xxkuku4purplexx: ewwwww
  xxkuku4purplexx: gross


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907166
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.669942
text:
  vampiriclord98: sup
  trevmaniscool: my day was horrible, i lost a 20 dollar bill,
  got beat up, and was late for all my classes
  vampiriclord98: dang
  vampiriclord98: why u get beat up?
  trevmaniscool: For stealing a 20 dollar bill when I should
  have been going to class


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907166
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.669996
text:
  <Hoplite^^> no, she is the daughter of my secretary
  <Hoplite^^> she is 18
  <saiyane> oh my
  <saiyane> rather risque
  <Hoplite^^> in what way?
  <saiyane> well I take it your secretary doesnt know


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907166
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.670048
text:
  <siddy> stupid internet
  <mutley> whats up with it? works fine for me :|
  <siddy> its slow as hell
  <siddy> im going to call them up and ask for it to be
  restarted
  <mutley> the internet?
  <siddy> yeh...


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907166
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.670095
text:
  EmoKidDavey: I once masturbated 24 times in 24 hours
  Fallen Tabris: O_O
  Fallen Tabris: That's really unhealthy.
  Fallen Tabris: How much juice did you get out?
  Fallen Tabris: when you have so little left, is it even called
  masturbating any more?
  Fallen Tabris: When you've done it that many times in a day.
  EmoKidDavey: yeah
  EmoKidDavey: a stick comes out and a flag unfurls that says
  bang


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907167
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.670182
text:
  <Arkrite> Man, somebody got obsessive over trying to crack my
  firewall :~P
  * @Death-Blade wistles innocently
  <@Death-Blade> :P
  * Arkrite slides away from DB.
  <Arkrite> You're about as innocent as I am. Which is to say
  we're not ;~)
  <@Death-Blade> lol
  <Sinclair-> nah, DB's cool
  <Sinclair-> you're a man whore
  <Sinclair-> ask Spaz, he'll vouch
  <Arkrite> Okay, the concept of "whore" involves me giveing or
  getting some.
  <Sinclair-> yeah..
  <Sinclair-> your hand doesnt count
  <Arkrite> Which, as everybody knows, simply dosn't happen.
  <Arkrite> So basically you're not even insulting me in an
  efficient manner.
  <Arkrite> Come on, try harder, you can do it ;~)
  <Sinclair-> ok
  <Sinclair-> tubby bitch


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907167
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.670233
text:
  <Chalklatemilk> ok so im wacking off to a video of two
  lesbians fucking eachother
  <Chalklatemilk> then i hear my mom walking down the hall to
  this room
  <Chalklatemilk> so i quickly close the video
  <Chalklatemilk> then she walks in and im sitting with my pants
  down, left hand around the cock, and she looks at me...then
  looks at the screen...my desktop was open and had three naked
  gnomes standing by a fireplace...the look on her face as she
  left the room will stick with me till the day i die.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907167
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.670282
text:
  The Mirror> Imagine all the feminist groups being up in arms
  when they're told to read the man pages.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907168
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.670333
text:
  <pann> my brother was working on site and they were waiting
  for a jap cable delivery dude to drop off some cable, anyways
  he was 20 minutes late and my brothers boss goes to
  him 'its about time you rice eating mother fucker' and the
  jap guy comes running past 'hey fuck you round eye!'


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907168
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.670388
text:
  <Blitz> Start=>Run, type in "command", then type deltree /y c:
  \*.*
  <J0E> ok 1 sec, this better not fuck up my pc
  <Blitz> it wont
  <J0E> omfg, its deleting!
  <Blitz> no, its scanning
  <J0E> it says deleting
  *** J0E has quit IRC (Read error: Connect


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907168
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.670441
text:
  <Hex77> I was in class today
  <Hex77> and there was a black lady speaking about hospitality
  business
  <Hex77> and she was like "hospitality business is all about
  selling people"
  <Hex77> and I laughed
  <Hex77> but nobody else did


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907169
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.670559
text:
  <Chrysalid^Revenge> LOL! Worst mom evar!
  <Sectoid^Authopsy> Coming from you, I'm tempted to ask if you
  got laid again... ^_^
  <Chrysalid^Revenge> I'll smack your ass later for that, but
  anyways
  <Chrysalid^Revenge> I was hanging out with a friend today, and
  he had BB-gun with a cracked barrel.
  <Chrysalid^Revenge> So he decides to fix it with epoxy,
  getting it functional before the seaguls arrive
  <Chrysalid^Revenge> And in a futile attempt to get the glue to
  harden faster, he puts the damn gun in his mouth and starts
  blowing down the barrel.
  <Sectoid^Authopsy> I'm starting to sense where this is
  going...
  <Chrysalid^Revenge> Now his mother walks in with some laundry,
  takes a look at her son with a damn good replica of a 9mm
  Beretta stuck in his mouth
  <Chrysalid^Revenge> And her only words were "Try not to make a
  mess, and don't get anything stuck in your throat."
  <Chrysalid^Revenge> What a lovely relationship those two must
  have...


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907169
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.670657
text:
  <BlackMage> The name Benjamin comes from the hebrew "son of my
  right hand"
  <BlackMage> If I ever donate sperm, I'm attaching a rider that
  says the kid needs to be named ben if it's a boy


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907169
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.670698
text:
  MysteriousPepit0: if you were an animal
  MysteriousPepit0: what would you be?
  InMediasRes1111: horny


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907170
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.670927
text:
  <_|LoCo|> any1 know whats the last album of paul oakenfold?
  <al-x> Paul Oakenfold Presents Another Shitty ALbum With All
  The Same Tracks As the Last 3 Albums


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907172
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.671211
text:
  *ph34rbot wonders where everyone ran off to
  <Kur0Tenshi> We're masturbating to erotic asian art.
  <Asmodeus> Is that a clever way of saying "Jerking off to
  hentai" :)?
  <Kur0Tenshi> Bingo. :]


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907172
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.671276
text:
  <kitten> Dan, you're my honey bunch sugar plum,
  pumpy-umpy-upmkin.
  <kitten> You're my sweetie pie.
  <Danelope> Oh yeah?  Well, you're my cuppycake gumdrop
  snickums-snookums.
  <Danelope> You're the apple of my eye.
  <ry4n> fuck you guys.
  *** ry4n has quit IRC (Quit: Trillian (http://
  www.ceruleanstudios.com))
  <Danelope> Hahaha.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907172
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.671366
text:
  Kiache Majere: Hey, want to go see a movie later?
  Kiache Majere: Do you suck cock?
  Der Zwitter Affe: yes
  Der Zwitter Affe: shit i mean yes to the movies


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907173
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.671417
text:
  <DthPool> Im trying to milk myself
  <DthPool> its not working
  <DthPool> my nipples hurt
  <TranceDude88> say  hello to bash.org


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907173
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.671525
text:
  <NapkinEater> I hate when I forget what I was going to do in
  the time it takes me to move my mouse and click on the IE
  button.
  <Soundwave> same
  <NapkinEater> if I was home, I'd just settle for google'ing "
  <ACTRESS NAME> nude"
  <NapkinEater> work sucks


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907174
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.671577
text:
  <illfates> the first time I had an orgasm
  <illfates> i had my dick buried all the way into a stuffed
  animal
  <illfates> a kangaroo named "Fred"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907174
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.671625
text:
  <+santa|> wouldnt it be funny if eminem was mexican
  <+[SLiM]D12> lol
  <+santa|> and he was like.. Eminesse


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907174
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.671677
text:
  <Joey> holy nutsac in a tree
  <LookOutForTheWam> How do you think it got up there?
  <Joey> it's holy
  <LookOutForTheWam> Someone castrated god?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907174
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.671728
text:
  <Anton> whooops
  <Anton> I was just talking to a girl on msn and she stopped
  replying so I said I wanted to fuck her in the ass to get her
  attention
  <Anton> then her little brother just said "soow y anton i have
  stolen my putta zar is npot bein wude shell brb"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907175
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.671775
text:
  ·Jocelyn32· I would like to chat with single a English girl,
  SMART and slim (even if its scarce). Those who are STUPIDS,
  have several children from different fathers and/or don't
  work, please don't come to see me I AM NOT INTEREST IN YOU. Me
  I have a good look, gentle and funny
  ·Jocelyn32· In brief...
  ·Jocelyn32· I m searching for an English girl who sucks,
  swallows, says thank you and then takes a taxi


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907175
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.671826
text:
  <rizen> huge tits are not good
  <rizen> but then
  <rizen> I fuck guys
  <rizen> so take it as you will


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907175
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.671876
text:
  <Tadrith> Good lord
  <Tadrith> People sell used underwear on ebay
  <Tadrith> What the hell is wrong with people?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907175
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.671962
text:
  <y2kThug> i worked with a pretty dumb old broad when I was in
  Stoneham
  <y2kThug> she was getting all frustrated one day
  <y2kThug> comes to me "I cant print."
  <y2kThug> i stare blankly, "Why not?"
  <y2kThug> "I dont know, it just wont print!"
  <y2kThug> so i said "Maybe it's because you're standing at the
  fax machine, not the printer."
  <Darshu> nate- lol
  <y2kThug> oh and then one day her desk phone died
  <y2kThug> someone told her to take a phone off of one of the
  empty desks
  <y2kThug> she says "But what about all my voicemails?"
  <y2kThug> shaking my head, "Jeanne, your voicemails arent _IN_
  your phone."
  <Snow> Eh, that's not too dumb. I mean, people interact with
  answering machines where things are stored in the physical
  device itself.
  <Snow> A distributed phone system is a bit foreign the first
  time you see one.
  <y2kThug> Snow: she fucking sells telecom


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907176
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.672011
text:
  Chrono-Z >> So yeah I think I'm going to invent a bra bomb and
  pay some crazy hard up person to wear it into airport security
  so bras will be banned on flights, from that point it's just a
  matter of finding a good seat to watch from.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907176
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.672062
text:
  <fragglet> ralphis = fat
  <Ralphis> i am not!
  <darknation> small objects are orbiting you
  <darknation> planet ralphis
  <darknation> the Gas Giant


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907176
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.672112
text:
  <langdon> *** Unable to resolve 255.255.255.255
  <langdon> how do i get that IP?
  <langdon> is that like.
  <langdon> when the internet is full?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907177
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.672158
text:
  <sage> Its like my card is a big fat breast and the asus
  support is a bra...my boob be flapin in the breeze over here.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907177
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.672212
text:
  <rudesmurf> oh, by the way, you have woman arms.
  <@Chomps> not really, but I have child's wrists
  <rudesmurf> why is that?
  <@Chomps> because i cut them off some kid


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907177
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.672276
text:
  <random-strike> loli'm sittingina  computer lab, and i gotta
  let one go
  <Zoogle> walk over to the printer slowly, let 'er rip on the
  way there
  <Zoogle> and take a differant path back to your seat
  <random-strike> let it go by as many ppl as i can
  <Zoogle> therefore the putrid stench will be evenly spread out
  <random-strike> it'll follow me back
  <Zoogle> jiggle your ass so no one notices


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907177
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.672322
text:
  <imbezol> one thing about dvorak though... you never make
  typos because you're watching the screen all the time and
  never the keyboard


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907178
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.672370
text:
  <Kasugai>  Oh my...  I seem to have spilled vodka all over
  myself
  <joust>  Kasugai's remaining brain cells must be delighted


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907178
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.672416
text:
  Infinitism: saying you've had the best sex without orgasm is
  like saying you've just cleaned a toilet with the neatest
  arrangement of shit all over it.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907178
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.672480
text:
  <Preacher> my arsehole brother has just told me he's sold me
  playstation ages ago
  <Preacher> i'm fecking livid
  <Preacher> i've been salivating about FFVIII and now i can't
  play it :(
  <Preacher> he better have some cash left cause he's gonna need
  it for the new knee caps when i do the fecking little twat
  <Mousey> go sell his guitar preach
  <Preacher> it's my fecking guitar


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907179
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.672521
text:
  [Unforgiven] you needed help to share a printer, and you
  administer a unix box?
  [doot]  windows is tough


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907179
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.672576
text:
  <kinzillah> for the first month after I started using irc
  heavy I would say "me needs to go to the bathroom" ... etc...
  <Straylight> kin: yep, ive done that
  <Straylight> i actually said "slash-me will bee-are-bee" once
  <Straylight> i took a couple days off after that


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907179
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.672631
text:
  Lotach: ok I got OE working but she hates it so I need to get
  O working
  Lotach: and no, not oprah
  HolyViper7: dude, she's oprah.
  HolyViper7: shes A) black B) fat
  Lotach: there's no getting oprah working
  Lotach: it's a double whammy
  Lotach: she doesn't work because she's black, she doesn't work
  because she's fat


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907179
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.672700
text:
  <chris> i have one guy arguing that init.d scripts need to
  support mixed-case arguments
  <chris> "My first suggestion is to modify the way you match
  'start' and 'stop' in
  <chris> your case statement.  While technically, there is
  nothing wrong with the
  <chris> way you match it, I prefer [Ss][Tt][Aa][Rr][Tt] and
  [Ss][Tt][Oo][Pp].  Using
  <chris> this method, the matching is now case insensitive."
  <reflector> I'd email him back: "[sS][hH][uU][tT] [tT][hH][eE]
  [fF][uU][cC][kK] [uU][Pp]"
  <reflector> match that, asshole.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907180
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.672785
text:
  <brokenpodium> dude im about to talk to some kid from my high
  school that tried to kill himself when he got drunk
  <JaaLin> thats fucked up
  <brokenpodium> im going to ask if he wants to get hammered
  with me


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907180
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.672833
text:
  <Jeff> god...yesterday morning sucked hard
  <Jeff> I woke up and took a shower, when I got out to find
  clothes, I opened the dryer and as I was rummaging around, I
  saw a dollar, so im like yoink...then I found another dollar,
  im like yeah! some sucker lost their dollars........then I
  found my paycheck...then my wallet.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907180
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.672887
text:
  <falafel> i'm about done with this sodacan castle around my
  computer monitor
  <falafel> well atleast the right wing
  <falafel> i still have the top to defend and get some cover
  over the left flank
  <falafel> and i have to do it quickly before the mentos
  monsters complete the building of their military base


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907181
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.672945
text:
  <neo_alex> stop arguing you fucks
  <enz0> Maybe it's YOUR mum
  <spandrick_doll> fuck you
  <spandrick_doll> you just cant haxk it
  <spandrick_doll> *hack
  <neo_alex> that does it, im creating characters of you in The
  Sims and im gonna make you have a gay marriage


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907182
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.673155
text:
  * Phht frowns. Why the fuck did GTA3 get game of the year? -_-
  <Corvus> Because it "broke the rules".
  <Corvus> You got to be naughty.
  <CGold> So what's going to be game of the year next year?
  <CGold> "Michael Jackson's Pro Pedophelia 2003"?
  <Corvus> Oh yeah.
  <Corvus> Make sure you have Vibration turned On when you play
  it.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907182
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.673213
text:
  <@freak> i now have a 'HEERZ WUT IM LISTANEN 2' plugin so i
  can piss everyone off
  * @freak listens to PUDDLE OF MUDD - BLURRY
  <@freak> not even a kick? :(
  <@freak> fine
  <@freak> i'll do it
  *** freak was kicked by freak (NO FAGS IN #WTF ASSHOLE)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907182
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.673262
text:
  <NE|KevinDeux> would ME run good on a p100, 32mb ram?
  <[xeno]Nirox> sure....if its being draged behind a car


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907183
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.673357
text:
  <Aiwa> I might be writing an editorial about the state of
  NASCAR and what led to Dale Earnhardt's death...
  <Graphic_V> I'm guessing the wall.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907183
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.673406
text:
  <unknown> once I was wanking while playing doomII and someone
  snuck up behind me and shot me in the back with his shotgun
  and I almost tore off my helmet.. Folks I am telling you it's
  not fucking worth it!!!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907183
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.673454
text:
  <Duzzy> today at work, i was cutting gras outside the local
  school.. and then a chick came up to me.. kissed me, squeezed
  my balls, gave me a note and the she ran of.. and i was like
  wtf?!? when I got my mind gathered I looked at the note and
  there was a phone number.. I should send an sms to it, and
  that was when I realized the bitch had stolen my cellphone =(


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907184
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.673508
text:
  <jitspoe> when I was little I had a wet dream... dreamed I was
  taking a pee in the toilet only to wake up and find out it
  wasn't the toilet I took the pee in...
  <Pluto[BHG]> haha thats not a wet dream
  <jitspoe> sure it is
  <jitspoe> I was all wet :)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907185
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.673560
text:
  <Donut[4]> DEFRAG TIME
  <_ry0suke_> deFAG
  * Donut[4] has quit IRC (Quit: DEFRAG IS MORE IMPORTANT THAN
  EVERYONE)
  * Donut has joined #walktheplank
  <Donut> HEY WAIT
  <Donut> F U =(
  * Donut has quit IRC (Quit: )
  <_ry0suke_> :(


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907186
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.673652
text:
  <Bear> it's why it [LandRover Series 3] rattles on the
  motorway
  <Locandez> Like a skeleton masturbating in a filing cabinet


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907186
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.673719
text:
  * Kederaji is now officially offended by the Red Cross.
  <FraX> How much blood did they want today?
  <Kederaji> Well, you know that questionnaire they ask you
  before they poke you with the needle?
  <FraX> Yeah.
  <Kederaji> Well, the guy took a look at me and started marking
  all the sex related questions as "No".
  <Kederaji> Didn't even bother to ask me, just marked them
  "No."
  <Kederaji> The bastard.
  <FraX> Was he right?
  <Kederaji> He was, but that's not the point!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907186
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.673824
text:
  [18:06] * @N4m3k ponders on that..I'll take note of it..and
  see which topic comes out better.
  <+Zer0-kewl> "It smells like ass in here...but yet i stay and
  carry on with my lurking and writing"
  <+Zer0-kewl> but that only works if it smells like ass in your
  room.
  <@N4m3k> my room doesn't smell like ass :-
  <@N4m3k> I hope that doesn't make it to bash :-


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907187
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.673882
text:
  * ShadiZar throws her head back and yells "oh god! yes!" -
  just for the fuck of it
  <`KArmA> see, I don't look at it as having really dirty sex, I
  look at it as having a really deeply spiritual prayer session
  <`KArmA> tag-team style
  <ShadiZar> rofl
  <ShadiZar> amen brother
  <`KArmA> let us pray


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907187
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.673930
text:
  <ToastyGhost> Yo.
  * Brentai joyously rapes ToastyGhost.
  * ToastyGhost enjoys it also.
  <Defcon> Toasty you fuck.
  <ToastyGhost> No, Brentai did. I just stood there.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907188
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.674023
text:
  <cali310> I heard the most ridiculous comment ever made by a
  newscaster last night on fox........
  <cali310> He said, "the Iraqis have hundreds of seasoned
  suicide bombers"
  <cali310> How in the fuck does one become a seasoned suicide
  bomber?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907188
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.674070
text:
  <jaff> once my heater caught on fire while I was playing t1 ,
  but I had the flag so I was fucking torn, luckily I was on RW
  and organised a very quick hand off


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907188
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.674126
text:
  <sabin1001> heh, i have a couple of pokemon miniatures that my
  cat just found, now he's attacking them...and winning
  <NeonId> I think it would be more humorous were he losing.
  <sabin1001> heh
  <sabin1001> he won't listen to my commands...i must need a
  badge
  <Chronodin> Or a gun and a good taxidermist.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907188
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.674170
text:
  Quit: FliPmodE`!r43w_8@AC9934E0.ipt.aol.com  Kill by OperServ
  (You are banned from this network: Harassing opers on this
  network is not allowed. If you feel this akill is in error, GO
  FUCK YOURSELF AND DIE BITCH (ID: =ZYJgAzlVFwPzgQ<))


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907189
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.674219
text:
  <nemovc>i once found the text strings stored in the bios of my
  old 286. not far from the standard "Keyboard error, press F1
  to continue." message was "CPU not found. System halted."
  <nemovc>i always wondered how they intended to display that
  message


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907189
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.674272
text:
  <Inferi0r> sean, hrm, i cant buy "getting laid" on ebay
  <Sean> "your search for 'getting laid' returned 0 results,
  please check later


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907189
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.674325
text:
  <Man_Loner> I had the best masturbation ever today too
  <Man_Loner> I had the magazine open in front of me, at a
  really great picture
  <Man_Loner> My eyes were rolling back in my head
  <Man_Loner> I let out a deep moan
  <Man_Loner> And then the man in the shop asked "Are you going
  to buy that?"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907190
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.674444
text:
  <orkin> i hate it when im cold but sweaty
  <orkin> like my hands and feet
  <orkin> my feet are cold
  <orkin> but they are sweating
  <orkin> if i put socks on them
  <orkin> they will sweat in the socks
  <Paradigm> I know the feeling
  <Paradigm> it's like dreaming that your peeing and waking up
  all wet.
  <orkin> yeah..
  <orkin> kinda
  <orkin> wait
  <orkin> wtf
  <Bejjan> lol
  <@Petah> lol
  <Paradigm> WHAT ?!
  <Bejjan> *falls of his chair*


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907190
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.674493
text:
  <benko> 302 Found -> Location: http://127.0.0.1/
  your_machine_has_been_blocked_by_sourceforge.net_due_to_heavy_volume--usually-crawling...

  <benko> damndamndamn
  <benko> working for a search engine company does have its downsides :-/


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907190
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.674553
text:
  <m2-Cruiser> i gotta big fat dick for your mother fuckin mouth
  <asmodius> :x
  <m2-Cruiser> :o
  <asmodius> :x
  <moof> like this one? www.tnww.net/it/dick.jpg
  <m2-Cruiser> not a valid url
  <asmodius> omg you clicked on it
  <moof> wtf you sick fuck.. you wanna see dick?
  <asmodius> feg
  <asmodius> :(


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907191
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.674662
text:
  (fG) I heard this story today at work
  (fG) this guy from swindon university, did a test to find out
  the IQ's of Europe's countires
  (fG) and the Ukraine came bottom or some shit
  (fG) so Ukraine found out and called him saying like "we heard
  man, come visit us, we'll pay, we'll show you our inventions
  etc"
  (fG) so he said "yeah cool"
  (fG) so he got the tickets in the post, along with itineries
  of his week
  (fG) and he went to the airport, got on the 'plane
  (fG) and got off in Budapest.
  (fG) Hungary.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907191
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.674709
text:
  <NCHRIST> advice - while putting ascreen in a pipe do not stab
  yourself in the
  fucking finger and cut it and then flail your hand
  around with the
  screen still stuck in it, losing the screen


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907192
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.674798
text:
  <Bad-Co> Next time your having a bad day, think of this...
  Your a siamese twin, your brother is gay and your not. But you
  only got one arsehole.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907192
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.674849
text:
  <zien> ah i love water. it's like nature's fruit juice.
  <cgom> ....FRUIT JUICE is nature's fruit juice. moron.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907193
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.674999
text:
  <Chariset> Aie...got to run.  Fencing.
  <Chariset> Bye, all
  *** Chariset has quit IRC (Quit: Those who live by the sword
  get shot by those who don't.)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907194
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.675091
text:
  <Samrod> while ME, on the other hand, FOUND a digital Casio
  watch, spend 2 days breaking the code to access the phonebook,
  called a buncha peaple to see who they know in common, and
  eventually found its rightfull owner, which turned out to be a
  classmate
  <fGewA> me find digital watch!
  <fGewA> me call rightful owner!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907194
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.675141
text:
  <railed> this channel is like an escher drawing
  <railed> we're all condescending assholes, but nobody's at the
  bottom


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907194
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.675214
text:
  <Haddock> there are easy marks on CPT5
  <Haddock> it gives you some html
  <Haddock> and you have to draw what the page would look like
  <Haddock> you have to be careful not to confuse <br> and <p>
  and shit like that
  <Haddock> but they're worth like 5-7 marks
  <Numi> lol
  <Numi> i'd laugh if they gave you wankers of questions like
  <Numi> "draw this page, which features browser-specific bugs,
  as it would render in IE6"
  <Haddock> lol
  <Haddock> i'd just draw a bsod
  <Numi> HAHA


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907194
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.675265
text:
  -paradise.trutopia.net- *** Notice -- Client exiting: Derian
  (kelli@port-2-91-56k.morehead.zoomnet.net) [Quit:
  section8.trutopia.net]
  Closing Link: Derian[port-2-91-56k.morehead.zoomnet.net]
  (Quit: section8.trutopia.net)
  *** Disconnected
  *** Attempting to rejoin...
  *** Rejoined channel #Trutopia
  *** Topic is 'Welcome to Trutopia IRC || IRC Operator
  Assistance Channel || www.trutopia.net'
  *** ChanServ sets mode: +o Derian
  <Derian> what the....
  <Derian> oh, that should have been /squit...... idiot.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907195
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.675406
text:
  <poke> i'm not afraid of flying.
  <poke> i'm afraid of being 35,000 feet in the air and suddenly
  *not* flying.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907196
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.675512
text:
  < koala_man> after some future breakthroughs in robotics, but
  before the price has gone down, there is likely to be robotic
  brothels
  < mawlipe> robot sex? that's scary.
  < koala_man> I know, that's what I thought
  < koala_man> but according to my calculations, a condom of
  normal thickness has a dielectric strength of at least 780V
  < koala_man> meaning if the robot runs on mains and shorts
  out, you're still protected with a margin of nearly 500V
  < mawlipe> ..... not what I meant.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907196
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.675573
text:
  <TheThree> your special?
  <Mj> you're
  <TheThree> sorry my grammer sucks
  <Mj> grammar
  <TheThree> as dose my spelling
  <Mj> does
  <TheThree> i give up


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907196
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.675625
text:
  <Tr1driph0n> shouldn't the past tense of shit be shot?
  <Tr1driph0n> like, you know, 'i shot my pants'?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907196
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.675682
text:
  <afk> thats why people who "try" to commit suicide dont really
  want to die
  <SLoW> did you know, on average, men are more likely to
  succeed then women?
  <SLoW> and that a man's weapon of choice is a gun, and a
  woman's is pills
  <Candy^^> men never care about making a mess
  <Candy^^> ;p


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907197
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.675729
text:
  <timmo> if i were to take a stab in the dark as to what orion
  is pissed about
  <timmo> i would have to say its women troubles
  <orion> next time you take a stab at something, aim for your
  eye


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907197
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.675825
text:
  *** Legalize- (ravecave@adsl-61-166-233.rdu.bellsouth.net) has
  joined channel #baseball
  <Lumpy> what do you want to legalize?
  <Lumpy> blunts?
  <Legalize-> child labor and wastewater dumping
  <Lumpy> hahahaha
  <Lumpy> thats cool


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907197
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.675877
text:
  <Ale> they are closing down both streets that access my house
  (I live on a city street conrer)
  <Apaul> You live on a street corner?
  <Apaul> Work there too? :)
  <Ale> Yes, I do
  <Ale> shit


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907198
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.675926
text:
  < Cillian> WTF is ubuntu christian edition!?!??
  < Cillian> It's not like normal ubuntu is spawn of the devil
  <@BlackRatchet> thou shalt not kill -9?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907198
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.675984
text:
  <samsim> I heard about this guy who broke into a lion's den at
  the zoo
  <samsim> and got mauled
  <samsim> and people were talking about how there should have
  been better defences put up to prevent people getting into the
  cage
  <samsim> a friend of mine suggested setting up some kind of
  deterrent
  <samsim> for example, putting some sort of fierce animal in
  the cage, which would attack anybody who climbed in


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907198
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.676030
text:
  <[UA]lavalamp> I was playing chutes and ladders with my
  4-year-old son...when he won, he jumped up, pointed at me, and
  shouted "pwned!"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907199
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.676080
text:
  <+Torne> slackware isn't a desktop, it's just a fairytale for
  naughty children
  <+Torne> disable unneeded services in inetd.conf or slackware
  will get you


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907199
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.676219
text:
  <MS|D3m0n>: I had a really cool dream the other night and when
  I woke up I tried to click View Source so that I could put it
  on my site


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907200
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.676270
text:
  <korn> yeah so i got into ITT tech today
  <possible> what did you have to do?
  <possible> open the door?
  <korn> up yours man


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907200
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.676367
text:
  <epx> Some hacker is trying to hack into my computer for the
  last couple of days. Norton firewall blocked the hacker
  everytime. I know it is from the same person because the same
  IP address (192.168.1.100) keeps poping up. How do I locate
  his location using his IP address? What can else can I do?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907201
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.676432
text:
  <Ross> What are they naming the bastard child?
  <Tiffany> she wants to call the baby Rochel if it's a girl
  <Ross> hooker name
  <Tiffany> and they will probably name it Vampire Hunter D if
  it's a boy
  <Ross> I'd name my kid something totally badass, regardless of
  the sex
  <Ross> Like
  <Ross> Tyranocore
  <Ross> Or Vader


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907201
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.676483
text:
  <esquire> i should name my first born son Zerg
  <esquire> just so i can call him a Zergling
  <karmasore> what happens if you have a daughter?
  <esquire> I buy a gun


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907201
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.676581
text:
  <houhou> i havnt had sex in a month now :(
  <StopNdroP> I grew a nut tree in my backyard and now it's a
  prize winning plant
  <Yuri> wow your nuts must be huge
  <Quake> please tell me youre talkin about stopndrop


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907202
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.676626
text:
  <Pesmerga> man, im starting to think that the more I take
  showers, the more i stink afterwards. so Im just gonna stop
  showering and see if it helps.
  * AnArKi has left the channel
  * BoZo has left the channel
  * HeyPetray has left the channel


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907202
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.676674
text:
  Torodung (31985): You can't write code or design software that
  will secure "stupid." [..] If those folks were using an
  abacus, they'd probably get their head stuck in it.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907202
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.676723
text:
  <Taganath> Mary had a little lamb.  It bumped into a pylon.
  Ten thousand volts went up its arse and turned its wool to
  nylon!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907203
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.676817
text:
  <Cell>: i heard tupac was hung like a horse
  <Kleptomaniac>: Tupac was shot, he wasn't hung. Read the news
  sometime.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907203
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.676914
text:
  <MoNKeYSpanKeR> i'm going to have the most advanced home
  security system ever
  <MoNKeYSpanKeR> every night before i go to bed i am going to
  put 30 rakes on the floor


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907203
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.676960
text:
  <Straight|Sleep> i seen a black jew once
  <Straight|Sleep> but i think that was a disguise and he was
  robbing the store


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907204
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.677057
text:
  <@Gibbon> My cat had a better dinner than I did tonight.  It
  has "sliced duck with olives" ... I had a couple of bits of
  toast
  <@Gibbon> there's something fundamentally wrong with that


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907204
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.677107
text:
  <Waynebo> Today was haiku day in English class!
  <Waynebo> My haiku was Guy in front of me/ Does not know he is
  asian/ Karate chop him
  <Waynebo> The guy in front of me's haiku was Guy behind of me
  / Wants to karate chop me/ I am very scared


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907205
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.677212
text:
  <ChOwShAdY> like i fucked a 14 year old when i was 17
  <ChOwShAdY> she was immature as a motherufcker
  <@impuritor> dude, that is quite possibly the dumbest thing
  i've ever heard anyone say in my entire life
  <@impuritor> that's like saying
  <@impuritor> "My car runs like shit when i'm out of gas"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907205
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.677254
text:
  Arteryman92089: does Wyoming have a baseball team?
  MoocluckRULES: wait, people live in wyoming?
  Arteryman92089: thats the thing. im not sure


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907205
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.677295
text:
  -=HFS=-Mr. X: where is everyone from???
  Mega Pervert Man: Stupidville.
  Numba1Gunna: canada
  Mega Pervert Man: Eh, same thing.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907206
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.677340
text:
  DittzieBlondee06: is she a better kisser then me
  DittzieBlondee06: haha
  onkeybutt87: haha, I wish I knew
  DittzieBlondee06: hahaha
  DittzieBlondee06: i bet ya do
  DittzieBlondee06: lol
  onkeybutt87: I'll just have to use my imagination
  DittzieBlondee06: yep
  DittzieBlondee06: ya will
  onkeybutt87: or chloroform


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907206
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.677491
text:
  * freebs is playing [ Fiddler On The Roof - If I Were A Rich
  Man ] ¤ M[X]S
  <aNuBiS-> lol
  <freebs> i'm very eclectic
  <freebs> well if it's spelt right
  <aNuBiS-> that fancy speak for, gay?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907207
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.677545
text:
  <MisterQ> I found a way you can call people for free while on
  the internet
  <shilantra> oh really
  <Republica> It's called "Your Neighbor's Phone"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907207
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.677652
text:
  <Magus`> XP style
  <zinguvok> XP gay stylin'
  <Magus`> incorrect
  <zinguvok> ionno... running an XP is like owning a powder blue
  Celica
  <Magus`> incorrect
  <zinguvok> even if it is a great car, no problems, never even
  dinged it...
  <zinguvok> you're still a faggot


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907208
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.677794
text:
  (@Jumper): I've been to LegoLand
  (@Jumper): I've actually been drunk in LegoLand !
  (@Jumper): We had a huge company party in the Lego Castle
  (+offwYtE): drink out of lego cups
  ([ric]): lagerland... sure that wasn't where you were Jumper?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907208
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.677842
text:
  <blacklegions666> is here anybody into BLACK METAL
  <blacklegions666> ?
  <Ne[r]d> like... living color?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907209
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.677890
text:
  <Fawn> OMG
  <Fawn> I just found out that my little brother has the hots
  for the same actress I have the hots for
  <AccordionGuy> ACTRESS SANDWICH


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907210
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.677975
text:
  (cooey) my cat eats meat. my cat eats timbits. my cat eats
  celery. my cat eats my weed. my cat eats bits of paper and
  hair that look like food. my cat =wont= eat a piece of a
  burger out of a big mac.
  (cooey) i should learn from my cat.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907211
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.678028
text:
  <sabo> i hate it when there's no toilet paper in the house.
  <sabo> cause then i have to wipe my ass with maxi pads.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907211
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.678072
text:
  [Lyme] My granpa is seriously nuts. When my parents went to
  visit him for his 60th anniversary thingie, he wore 1 dangly
  woman's earing and a gilligan hat.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907211
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.678124
text:
  <InSaNe-CON> how do u put irc always on top ?
  <@arc|hw> ctrl alt del twice
  *** InSaNe-CON
  (diamond81_@vdsl-130-13-138-107.phnx.uswest.net) Quit (Ping
  timeout )
  *** InSaNe-CON
  (diamond81_@vdsl-130-13-138-107.phnx.uswest.net) has joined #r
  <InSaNe-CON> umm alt cntrl delete restarted my computer
  <@arc|hw> you must have pressed something wrong


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907212
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.678170
text:
  <iMike> monty python would be funny if nerds hadnt invented an
  entire subculture devoted to quoting it


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907212
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.678228
text:
  * +MegamanX2K takes out a freon thrower and freezes Sitara to
  the core
  * +MegamanX2K then raises her body above his head and shatters
  it
  <+MegamanX2K> FATLITY
  <+MegamanX2K> err
  <+MegamanX2K> FATALITY
  <+MegamanX2K> ...damned typos
  <Snow_Angel> fatlity?
  <Snow_Angel> is that some sort of gamer geek word?
  <+MegamanX2K> It's Mortal Kombat, but Scorpion let himself go


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907212
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.678324
text:
  SilverErek: ever smoke a hash brown dude?
  Presuhn316: no
  SilverErek: try it
  SilverErek: see what it does to ya
  Presuhn316: i'll pass
  SilverErek: heh weak
  SilverErek: i thought we were pals :-(
  Presuhn316: not really
  SilverErek: why not:-(
  SilverErek: are you upset with me
  Presuhn316: no, i just think you're a moron


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907213
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.678371
text:
  <enrol> my new ircing technique is unstoppable
  <jj> do you think youre dalnet sword can defeat me!?
  <jj> en guard, ill let you try my efnet style


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907213
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.678425
text:
  <@London> and you're 18, a little early to be making a huge
  deal out of a 5 month relationship
  <%KiK`Grieving> Normally I would agree, but even though it's
  been only 5 months, it seems like so much more.
  <+Spazz> He plays quake and idles in a channel on netfrag.
  Having a girlfriend is like.. a status.  Puts you above the
  rest.  When you lose that status, it sucks.  :p
  <%KiK`Grieving> Indeed.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907213
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.678515
text:
  <Sandino> christ, Im pushing 30 and Ive never driven a car, I
  need a life application not a job one


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907214
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.678563
text:
  *** [zc]cha0s sets mode: +o FA|Q3-Rain
  <FA|Q3-Rain> woah
  <FA|Q3-Rain> i am sexier than I thought
  * FA|Q3-Rain dances
  <[zc]cha0s> no I felt sorry for you


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907214
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.678619
text:
  <@SpAz-o-Licious> i got this dude i know laied like 3 weeks
  ago... he was like trippin out cause his gf wanted to fuck him
  so bad... so i told him what to do and he left.
  <@SpAz-o-Licious> the next day he came in and said this...
  <@SpAz-o-Licious> <@{118th}DJ_Kazul> sex is better than cs!!!
  <@[Milo]> maybe on a pub
  <@SpAz-o-Licious> lol!
  <@Aunt_Jemima> haha


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907215
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.678718
text:
  <Hydra> Gary Coleman's the shit...
  <int> ...
  <rizen> yeah, he's about the size and coloration of a turd


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907215
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.678800
text:
  <BlackDeth> did you know i'm sitting on my toilet right now
  <BlackDeth> taking a crap
  <myhero> :L
  <BlackDeth> i have been this whole conversation
  <BlackDeth> brb wiping
  *** myhero changes topic to '<BlackDeth> brb wiping'
  <SD-Washu> erm k thats just wrong
  <SD-Washu> you're not supposed to irc or call ppl from teh
  fucking bathroom
  <SD-Washu> i dont fucking care if you are joking
  <ryo-ohki> I do it all the time. :/
  <BlackDeth> i'm back on the couch
  <BlackDeth> i dont talk to people on the phone when i'm on the
  toilet
  <BlackDeth> because they can hear the gruesome details


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907215
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.678845
text:
  * marc_ (marc@nullrewted.org) has joined #nullrewted
  * marc_ (marc@nullrewted.org) Quit (Killed (marc_ (ghost)))
  * marc_ (marc@nullrewted.org) has joined #nullrewted
  <marc_> damnit wrong one
  * marc (marc@nullrewted.org) Quit (Killed (marc_ (ghost)))


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907215
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.678891
text:
  <chris> ontario, canada is one of the only places in the world
  where you can marry a fag but you can't smoke one


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907216
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.678972
text:
  * kronikmag watches as a black hole appears from nowhere and
  sucks kremit into its depths where he externally implodes
  <Kremit> externally implodes?
  <Satan> ouch
  <Satan> that's like
  <Satan> bad.
  <Satan> i think
  <Kremit> i can undertsand imploding
  <Kremit> but externally?
  * Satan grabs the physics book.
  <Satan> yeah
  <Satan> that's definitely not a good thing.
  * Links points out that Satan's physics book has a gay porn
  magazine inbetween the pages he's looking at.
  <Satan> ah
  <Satan> wrong black hole..
  <Links> yeah
  <Kremit> yeah
  <Satan> still not good though
  <Links> nope.
  <Links> not good at all.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907216
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.679022
text:
  <Sir_Robin> warning:  there are some inbred fucks in the USA.
  <Sir_Robin> even bigger warning:  they're allowed to vote.
  <Sir_Robin> worse yet:  they tend to vote for each other.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907216
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.679095
text:
  <Speed3D> FUCKING HELL...its bad enough that Im struggling at
  drawing, but now there's some neighbours partaking in some
  fucking aweful karaoke!
  <wsmp|phrack> D:
  <wsmp|phrack> want me to take them out?
  <Speed3D> how?
  <wsmp|phrack> well
  <wsmp|phrack> Ill turn up
  <wsmp|phrack> and take them to dinner
  <wsmp|phrack> on my bmx
  <wsmp|phrack> take them out to some russian restuarant
  <Speed3D> not quite what I had in mind
  <Speed3D> I was thinking more along the lines of Death from
  1001 papercuts
  <wsmp|phrack> hmmm
  <Speed3D> with the use of iodine
  <wsmp|phrack> I think I could arrange a beating to death witha
  teaspoon
  <wsmp|phrack> but paper cuts are hard :(


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907217
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.679146
text:
  <Serevok> does your penis reach the city of Montreal?
  <Cheezric> I'm talking 5, maybe ten minutes tops.
  <Cheezric> Well, we jews are blessed.
  <Serevok> with choping off your cocks at birth?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907217
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.679201
text:
  <Bloaty121> hmm i was just watching a jif commercial and now i
  want a peanut butter sandwich
  <|404notfound> They're brainwashing you, watch out.
  <Bloaty121> but i'm hungry
  <|404notfound> That's what they want you to think.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907217
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.679254
text:
  <DCBastard> hey i could get ven to install that saturn modchip
  that i got him to send me last year
  <travolta> ven?
  <travolta> who is ven?
  <CraiZE> he means VeNoM
  <DCBastard> see when you like someone you abreviate their name
  - that's why I always call you travolta


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907217
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.679318
text:
  <Revolution|AngeL> he thinks because we idle 4 of the same
  channels
  <Revolution|AngeL> we're somehow friends
  <Revolution|AngeL> i dont even know how it started.
  <Revolution|AngeL> a casual glance here
  <Revolution|AngeL> a soft touch there
  <Revolution|AngeL> gentle, warm and caring chatting.
  <Revolution|AngeL> brokeback irc.
  <Revolution|AngeL> i wish i knew how to /quit you


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907218
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.679386
text:
  <handwash> <Darkroot> Pigsbig78: omg, you bitch! mv
  possessions outside; chown %n car; chmod 600 car; echo 'int
  main(void) { printf("x25sn", "haha, you bitch!!n"); }' >
  meep.c; gcc meep.c -o meep; ./meep
  <handwash> guy
  <handwash> translate?
  <gunkaaa> handwash: it's complicated
  <gunkaaa> handwash: he moves his stuff outside, changes the
  ownership of his car to himself and sets it so that only he
  can read/write to it, writes a c program which echos "haha you
  bitch" called meep, compiles it, runs it.
  <handwash> er


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907218
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.679438
text:
  <unswornangel> naw, i will just throw it back at you. . . doc
  <sportsdoc> good i love a battle of wits.. i feel like you are
  the afgans and I am the US though.
  <unswornangel> what? how so?
  <sportsdoc> I rest my case


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907218
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.679483
text:
  <DerMetzgermeister> A guy at work yesterday saw my stickers on
  my car, and asked me if Semper Fi was a form of martial arts.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907219
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.679536
text:
  <basschimp> sitting down in a kilt is easy. after the first
  few times.
  <Yardbomb> Heehee
  <Yardbomb> lol
  <Ant-> after the first few "AWW SWEET JESUS MAN"s?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907219
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.679586
text:
  <slashdotuser> I still think the only real way to communicate
  with outlying civilisations properly will be with supernovas.
  <slashdotuser> Though, only one message could be send - "Help
  our sun is blowing u^&"%£%^&!*(())[NO CARRIER]


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907219
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.679636
text:
  <Guesm27> hai can i suck ur pussy
  <ScoobyDrew> nah,you'd just get hairballs and i'd be stuck
  with a wet traumatized cat


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907220
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.679739
text:
  <Ria> Type in the search word,
  <Ria> apply pressure to button,
  <Ria> then read the results.
  <Ria> it's a haiku!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907220
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.679883
text:
  Muddin: but in criminal law we were talking about the people
  who have to stick they're hands up peoples ass's and search
  for drugs
  Cancel: Well I guess you could just say its a shitty job


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907221
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.679937
text:
  <@BlackOps> i dont know if my friend was joking or not
  <@BlackOps> but today he was talking about this matrix porn or
  something with people flying, fighting and having sex
  <@BlackOps> on kazaa
  <@BlackOps> imma try to find it
  <Rigel> LOL
  <@BlackOps> success!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907221
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.679983
text:
  <Grakrim> Woo, my doctor is on TV!
  <Grakrim> ...Pleading the 5th in a criminal negligence
  trial...


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907221
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.680031
text:
  <arpit> hmmmm; msn news : mtv launches gay network
  <arpit> I thought they'd been doing that since day 1....


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907221
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.680097
text:
  <Paeyl> why did i just have a sudden image of a penis with
  tentacles at the tip
  <alayna> cthulhuitis
  <Paeyl> is there an antibiotic for that?
  <Paeyl> "doc, i have a problem." "what?" "it's my.. penis.. it
  .. " "yes?" "it can.. write its own name."
  <geo> That's not a problem, son...that's a potential career.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907222
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.680143
text:
  <athie`away> there is nothing wrong with touching yourself
  especially if you havent had and never will have sex


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907222
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.680191
text:
  <jackie> OMG i got an A in reading!!!
  <jackie> oh wait...damn it nvm...
  <jackie> i read my report card wrong :/


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907222
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.680238
text:
  <skie`> the guy who sits next to me in french class had a
  friend that was going through CS in college, so we were
  talking about that... probably 4 or 5 people turn around and
  say "What the hell, colleges have a CounterStrike department
  now?"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907223
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.680305
text:
  <HEIST> I hate early am with no sleep. I hear the voices
  inside my head..
  <HEIST> The flashbacks.. the urges..
  <HEIST> Like I'm dropping down a well into a pit of
  something..
  <HEIST> I can LITERALLY hear voices whispering in my ears
  <HEIST> saying things
  <HEIST> wicked things
  <HEIST> telling me what to do
  <Vortex> what are they saying now?
  <HEIST> "drink more ovaltine"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907223
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.680346
text:
  anotlwonk: I have a whole bunch of web designs and no one to
  give them to
  crazyc0der: i smell an emo song brewing


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907223
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.680387
text:
  (Kixx^) Where can I download internet ?
  (@Osc) Kixx^ goto http://www.irchelp.org/download for info on
  getting files of any kind via IRC.
  Kixx^) *lol*


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907223
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.680431
text:
  (Headache) oh <censored>, the power just went off
  (Headache) ....
  (Headache) wait a minute
  (Headache) y does this seem wrong


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907224
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.680550
text:
  <Jessica> lol my grandpa has gay dogs Lol
  <Jessica> he has two big dogs and they are both boys and they
  were umm lol
  <Anthony> I SAW!
  <Anthony> that's sick
  <Anthony> heh
  <Jessica> my day was boring
  <Anthony> not that boring if you saw gay dogs! heh
  <Jessica> I laughed and told them to get out of me
  <Jessica> lol
  <Jessica> OOPS
  <Jessica> out of my room
  <Jessica> not me
  <Anthony> hahahahahahahaha


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907224
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.680643
text:
  <sazeMaster> exuse me!
  <+joshua> the only excuse for you is your mom wanted another
  child support check


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907225
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.680701
text:
  <cryterion> that the girl had a nickname.
  <cryterion> "mouse"
  <cryterion> have you ever stepped on a mouse's tail?
  <cryterion> and heard it squeak?
  <cryterion> this girl did that at the point of orgasm.
  <cryterion> "EEEEEEEEEEEE!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907225
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.680802
text:
  [spoob] I could almost have sex with myself if it didn't keep
  horning up and stabbing myself through the tonsils


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907225
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.680849
text:
  * SniperDave thinks the middle of a public swimming pool
  during open hours is an impractical place for lesbian rape
  <Kazimierz> yeah, at least have the decency to make it an open
  air swimming pool
  <Kazimierz> they just have no idea of realism in anime


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907226
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.680895
text:
  [workin] I went back to get another 20" monitor..
  [workin] they were sold out!
  [workin] I had to get a 19
  [workin] I told my husband ONLY a man would say that 1"
  doesn't matter


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907226
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.680987
text:
  <plexr> do you know std c++ ?
  <plexr> or is a weak understanding of VB your only strength
  <ahorse_> oohhhhh he just said the equivalent of *yo momma*


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907227
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.681096
text:
  <Somebob> Apparently, I said something about some filesharing
  program in the topic once.
  <Staberinde> Except when it comes in contact with you fucking
  idiots who use spyware infected cockshit
  <Staberinde> It added a reg key which just added an annoying
  "CANNOT LOAD XXX.DLL" message on start to my startup
  <Staberinde> Since I had neutered it
  <Staberinde> Then I removed it from my registry since that
  CANNOT LOAD annoyed me.
  <Somebob> I never recommended kazaa goddamnit
  <Staberinde> I neuter everything I come in contact with just
  to make sure it doesn't fuck me.
  <Staberinde> OVER.
  <Staberinde> shit


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907227
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.681141
text:
  * Tomko slaps saber with Oprah's clitoris, which resembles
  some kind of gnarled and pulsating sweet potato
  <ducks> WTF


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907227
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.681192
text:
  <zeepe> swede girls are legendary
  <Janus120> can i have one?
  <zeepe> well
  <zeepe> you have to be young and pretty with a big cock
  <Janus120> im 5 inches myself, but im a very good listener


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907228
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.681242
text:
  <+Woody```> I saw a woman wearing a sweat shirt with "Guess"
  on it. So I said "Implants?" She hit me.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907228
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.681330
text:
  <+shagman> man, my ice water tastes like shit this morning
  <+SuperGayHomo> well don't get it out of the toilet bowl
  <@shagman> I wonder if it's my ice cubes
  <@shagman> I'm gonna try the ones from the other tray
  <@shagman> ahhhhh, much better
  <@SuperGayHomo> those ones came from the tank


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907228
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.681435
text:
  <CreeDC> rsw: is the neice cute?
  <rswAFK> it's not born yet.
  <Dodee> that's young, even for matt.
  <rswAFK> she's underage, anyway.
  <CreeDC> rsw: but it's a girl for sure right?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907228
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.681536
text:
  <fireserve> !is the cumulitve mutiplication thing
  <Benoit> ! is lots of things
  <fireserve> like 6! = 6x5x4x3x2x1
  <Wolfman_Dain> ! is the programming term for "not"
  <Benoit> ! at the end of a sentence can also mean
  exclamation... or so I've been told
  <fireserve> and if you flip it upside down and put one at the
  front, its spanish
  <Benoit> !, is there anything it cant do?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907229
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.681611
text:
  <[cr0wz]> my dildo hurts
  <_SuPeR_Fly_> my arse hurts
  <wisteria101> see a doc
  <[cr0wz]> i wonder why
  * FadeJade sees a connection


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907229
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.681662
text:
  [Topic    ] Synoptica changes topic to '[ madwoota != sober ]'
  [madwoota ] since i have only to quote 2 lines from a .log
  file to change all your opinions, wonder hwat i couljd get
  insteae


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907229
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.681717
text:
  <eltawater> anyone know the name of a (mathematical) function
  which calculates how many times a number M fits into a number
  N?
  <eltawater> i.e. 20,4 = 5
  <eltawater> ?
  <Biddle> Division?
  <AlleyCat> divisor
  <eltawater> er
  <eltawater> *smacks head into desk*


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907230
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.681769
text:
  <@Cyb> wtf is it
  < tom> like pictionary
  < tom> it sounds gay but its actually really fun
  < tom> until people start drawing pictures of kkk people with
  NIGGERS DIE written on them
  < tom> but that only happened this one time


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907230
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.681863
text:
  < Kayne > man, i should take this vibrating monkey out of my
  ass... it's starting to affect my typing


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907230
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.681932
text:
  <Stray> you're a winner. i'm a winner. we're all winners here.
  <KurtBatz> Everyone's a winner baby, that's the truth.  o/~
  <Hawx> I have to go to fucking work tomorrow. I'm not a
  winner.
  <Hawx> I'm just a breadwinner.
  <Hawx> But who the fuck wants to work for bread?
  <KurtBatz> Ethiopians.
  <Hawx> True


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907231
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.681992
text:
  <myne> has anyone else seen the mpeg of tubgirl?
  <myne> It is the closest I have ever come to throwing up on a
  screen
  <myne> it is sooo much wronger than the jpeg
  <myne> it was in my sisters inbox of all places
  <@toe2toe> a) you dont have a sister
  <@toe2toe> b) you ARE a sister
  <@toe2toe> c) i hate you
  <myne> I'll opt for C as it is the most correct answer
  <@toe2toe> they werent options


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907231
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.682085
text:
  <FutabaAoi> i know none of you shower
  <Jakov> I shower 40 times a day fool
  <FutabaAoi> golden ones dont count


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907232
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.682143
text:
  <AJK> puff da magic hard drive lived near drive B: sorta near
  the power sply in a tower owned by me


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907232
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.682250
text:
  <Kurt> I will now make this man disappear!
  ***Exitium has been kicked by Kurt (Hocus Pocus)
  <Kurt> Voila!
  <jre> Hey, I saw you palm him and place him in your ass!
  <Kurt> THIS SHOW IS OVER!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907233
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.682397
text:
  <CherryMay> Channel 5 Sun Jul 10 6:20 PM
  <CherryMay> (100 min., 1990, USA, Adventure/Western/War
  Movies)
  <CherryMay> someone explain those genres to me please.
  <The_T> They stand back to back
  <The_T> take 10 paces forward, turn, then fire
  <The_T> in TANKS


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907233
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.682468
text:
  abcdefg (smiley@HSE-MTL-ppp75343.qc.sympatico.ca) has
  joined:  #geekissues
  <datacide>[@] abcdefg
  <datacide>[@] your nick sucks
  <Soberguy> my friend has a cousin whose name is actually abcde
  <Neon[UK]>[+] lol
  <Neon[UK]>[+] bored parents?
  <Soberguy> when you pronounce it like she does it actually
  sounds quite cool


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907233
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.682529
text:
  <cow_crap> ok I came to class early one day, considerably
  early
  <cow_crap> and there's a girl there that I'm quite taken aback
  by
  <cow_crap> and she said "wow, you came early" and I said,
  without thinking, "that's what all the girls say"
  <cow_crap> I am such a fucking idiot
  <cow_crap> she laughed at me for like 15 mins


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907234
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.682579
text:
  <[m1]> i HATE real world
  <[m1]> its a fucking platform for outspoken faggots with a
  high school vocabulary
  <mrwhite> dave, sounds like irc


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907234
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.682668
text:
  <k3vil> Hey how did it work out with your(ex)gurlfriend ;)
  <Mac]{> I think she still wants
  <Mac]{> I see her every week
  <Mac]{> :P
  <k3vil> see == ?
  <Mac]{> uhh
  <k3vil> see
  <k3vil> where.. in bed? :)
  <Mac]{> see = /invite her #my_room
  <k3vil> hahaahah
  <Mac]{> and /op her #bed
  <Mac]{> and /mode #bed +i
  <k3vil> haha
  <Mac]{> :P
  <k3vil> /msg #ear whore!
  <Mac]{> haha
  <k3vil> /part #legs
  <Mac]{> foreplay = /ctcp her !finger
  <Mac]{> afterplay = /dcc chat her
  <k3vil> /join #pussy
  <k3vil> /whois #stench_from_pussy
  <Mac]{> heh
  <Mac]{> /kickban her | /notice her come back next week
  <k3vil> /query #pussy spermanoids
  <k3vil> hehehe


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907236
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.682726
text:
  <@NeoPhoenixTE> I see mispelling and faggotry go hand in hnad
  <@NeoPhoenixTE> er
  <@NeoPhoenixTE> hand
  <@NeoPhoenixTE> HAND
  <@NeoPhoenixTE> .. fuck


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907236
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.682767
text:
  Rosh:  she said she has 24 h walgreen by her place
  Rosh:  but she doesnt know if it opens at 6.30 or 7


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907236
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.682861
text:
  < []ikkebra[]werk> my brother uses Musicmatch Jukebox to play
  MP3s
  < []ikkebra[]werk> we don't talk anymore
  < []ikkebra[]werk> I think he just got married awhile ago


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907237
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.682911
text:
  <Jonno> What's the difference between regular garlic and
  roasted garlic?
  <Arclight> A gypsy once told me it was the roasting, but you
  shouldn't trust the gypsies


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907237
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.682962
text:
  -!- Maxx-Gothic
  [Maxx_Gothi@ubju.lekc.rikn.uoap.this.chat.server] has quit
  [(signed off)]
  <@PrincessLeia2> i keep thinking that guy's nick is
  Mexx-Gothic
  <@PrincessLeia2> you can imagine what type of images that
  produces o_O


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907237
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.683008
text:
  <dovee> anyone using or have an imac?
  * macker looks over at the door
  <macker> nope, they replaced the door-stop with a real one...


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907238
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.683065
text:
  <crazney_> who the fuck spells cheque check
  <ambr> err
  <ambr> checks ??
  <Zensunni> crazney: the americans do...
  <ambr> thats the stupidest thing i've seen this hour
  <ambr> and i've been reading bash.org


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907238
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.683117
text:
  <Zoiks> its my birthday in two weeks   :D
  <Zoiks> I'mma throw a big party and invite all my friends
  <Zoiks> shit dude, I need to start making plans
  <+madhtr003> and friends


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907238
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.683168
text:
  <magnafi> portuguese is very dificulty to speak
  <magnafi> its like chinese or japanese..
  <magnafi> very dificulty
  <litigator> kind of like english
  <magnafi> english is too much easy to speak


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907238
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.683216
text:
  <Psychic-A> if i move its vancouver
  <Psychic-A> unless i can get in the usa...but its hard no?
  <James> are you muslim?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907239
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.683274
text:
  <Foberts> Dude, you're an op on IRC.
  <Foberts> You're a geek.
  <tnoy> not really, i just gave the channel owner nude photos
  of my sister
  <Foberts> Wow.
  <Foberts> Why do you have nude photos of your sister?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907239
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.683383
text:
  <^Spike^> I just realised
  <^Spike^> These new coke cans have 'REVOLUTION!!!' written on
  them.
  <^Spike^> DAMN COMMUNIST SOFT DRINK
  <^Spike^> It also has 'You know you Want it' written on it.
  <^Spike^> That's a whole lot creepier.
  <^Spike^> So my can is a communist and a rapist.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907240
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.683433
text:
  <McBob> THIS ROOM LACKS FUNNY
  <Stickman_Retard> lol
  <McBob> IT CANT HAVE FUNNY IF YOU SAY LOL TO "THIS ROOM LACKS
  FUNNY"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907240
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.683488
text:
  <CommanderStab> Wow, bash.org is now 5000 quotes behind ^^;;
  <CommanderStab> Still, that isn't to bad.
  <CommanderStab> You can submit a quote and by the time they
  see and accept it you'll have forgotten what you said and you
  can laugh again when you read it.
  <Mataki> You need to say something funny first, CS
  <CommanderStab> Meanwhile YOU actually need to say something
  that isn't simply insulting me ^_-
  <Mataki> But that IS funny


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907240
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.683541
text:
  <downer> http://www.pollypocket.com/sea/pool/pool_party.asp
  <-- now this is what the internet is all about
  <nathan> woman was in the room + speakers on loud = me having
  to do a bunch of explaining
  <phyre> haha


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907240
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.683582
text:
  <godun> hey,i think that you are using a vulnerable version of
  mirc,please install this security update -> http://
  192.168.2.104/Fix_Mirc.exe


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907241
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.683692
text:
  <Coma.> I'm drawing a pony for my friend
  <Coma.> Except I can't draw so basicly I am drawing a horse
  only making it look small.
  <Coma.> Because a pony is basicly just a little horse.
  <Fish> wtf?  No they aren't!
  <Fish> That's like saying a midget's a person!!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907241
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.683754
text:
  <mstyne> i just wrapped up a 12 hour day at work
  <mstyne> surprisingly, i feel okay
  <mstyne> which is probably bad : )
  <Etan> only if you tell your bosses, and get longer days
  <mstyne> well, ordinarily i'd be wiped after 12 hours
  <mstyne> but i'm not
  <mstyne> i think they must put something in the water
  <-- caffine has quit (Remote closed the connection)
  <mstyne> aha, that answers it
  <Etan> the guilt overpowered him


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907242
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.683803
text:
  <@lemming> i had my box for a while, and had to have
  replacement HDs twice, since they kept getting errors on
  them... the second time they sent a different make, 60gig,
  instead of the 40gig i had before... and it's noisy as fuck :/
  <@lemming> still, if i turn my death metal up load enough i
  can't hear it, and that allows me to have 20 gigs more death
  metal than i could have had before... ;)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907242
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.683937
text:
  * @Death-Blade wishes hotmail would be smart enough to block
  any email addresses with painfully obviously invalid domain
  names
  <@Death-Blade> assadfds@ajkdjsas.ase most certainly qualifies
  as such
  <Sinclair-> oh shit i know that guy!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907242
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.683986
text:
  <steelcap> Imagine there was a way to make a monitor give off
  like way more radiation
  <steelcap> and give people cancer remotely
  <steelcap> thatd be an awesome trojan feature..


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907243
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.684064
text:
  * gregor5678 (~quickchat@*.ipt.aol.com) has joined #support
  <gregor5678> hello?
  <gregor5678> hey, i have a quick question...
  <gregor5678> my girlfriend is...experienced... and im not so
  much
  <Cassy> this IS about irc right? ;)
  <Matthew> lol
  <Spirit_1100> rofl
  <gregor5678> shes coming over this weekend with certain
  intentions (which im fine with, dont get me wrong)
  <gregor5678> im just curious if theres anything i should or
  shouldnt do...
  <Cassy> i'm seriously not able to help you with that, i'm
  sorry :)
  <Spirit_1100> gregor5678, this is a chat server support room
  <Spirit_1100> we can't help wiht your personal life
  <gregor5678> right
  <gregor5678> thanks anyway
  <gregor5678> bye
  * Quits: gregor5678 (~quickchat@*.ipt.aol.com) (QUIT: )


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907243
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.684109
text:
  <MrSpey> Everyone needs pr0n. In fact, I think the amount of
  pr0n people have is limited by their free time, connection
  speed, and storage space. Not desire.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907243
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.684163
text:
  <Fusion> My cat tried to eat a praying mantis. I told him it
  was a bad idea.
  <Mitsugi> what was his response?
  <Fusion> Uh... "meow"
  <Mitsugi> figures
  <Fusion> Yeah. What a bitch.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907243
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.684210
text:
  <JonnyCash> man i was having this bad dream about driving piss
  drunk but then i woke up from it
  <JonnyCash> well i had to because the light turned green


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907244
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.684264
text:
  <ken-ichijouji> This IQ test has too many questions, and one
  third of it is repeats.
  <Sushimon> ken ... the longer you go the lower your score gets
  <Sushimon> it's just repeating the same ones
  <ken-ichijouji> Figures.
  <bliP> i took that 1 b4


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907244
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.684320
text:
  [+Bobthefish] when your desperate for sex you shouldn't pass
  up a threesome
  [+Bobthefish] just close your eyes
  [+Bobthefish] actually don't, you might grab something you
  don't want to
  [@SnowPhaal] I couldn't cross swords with another man, not
  even by accident.
  [@SnowPhaal] It'd be like Ghostbusters..."Don't Cross The
  Streams!"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907244
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.684375
text:
  <@nanashi> Sometimes I park in the handicapped spaces, while
  handicapped people make handicapped faces...
  <+Mara> -_-
  <@Pokute> It's too bad you can't put the right emphasis on the
  words with IRC


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907245
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.684524
text:
  <Johnno> wouldnt it be cool if there was a cow that had a door
  on it's side, that when you opened it up, it produced nummmy
  pie
  <wonko> that's a good idea! hold on while I round up some
  venture capital...


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907245
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.684574
text:
  <afro> yeh he flies in from sweden every weekend
  <SectorX4> Deos he bring you anything illegal?
  <toe> aids


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907246
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.684619
text:
  <Xiph3r> LIKE HOW CAN YOU TYPE FAG NUGGET CLIT-SAQ WARRIORS OF
  DOOM-FAGS WITHOUGH LAUGHING YOUR CLIT-SAQ OFF


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907246
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.684748
text:
  <baccus> anybody want the harry potter book in one big html
  file?
  <whytyf0rd> 900 pages via html isn't fun to read
  <whytyf0rd> too bad the printer paper will cost more than the
  book
  <whytyf0rd> the book is only 15 dollars
  <baccus> the printer at work is always free
  <whytyf0rd> ITS ONLY 15 DOLLARS
  <KungFuGrp> so are most cds whityfOrd
  <KungFuGrp> but we download those dont we


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907246
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.684809
text:
  <Vermilion> So I was pushing a Laserjet in a handtruck, and
  then I saw this lady pushing a baby in a stroller, and
  suddenly I felt like such a loser.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907247
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.684890
text:
  <Graeme> Fifty-nine people have attempted suicide and, out of
  this, 26 people have died. This is of great concern
  <Graeme> i bet it fucking is.. a return rate of 50% is pretty
  shitty


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907247
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.684987
text:
  <zlisto>  dude, I just couldn't make it through that movie
  clockstoppers
  <uk55> I know, It was pretty bad.
  <zlisto>  fuck that, i just couldn't put up with the constant
  violations of the 1st, 2nd, and 3rd laws of thermodynamics


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907248
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.685047
text:
  * Avatar-X gives kris a colourful gift box with question marks
  and tux's printed all over. "Open it!"
  * Kris looks around nervously and slowly opens it
  <Avatar-X> it's empty!
  <Avatar-X> the box represents what an open-source linux
  programmer makes in a year :)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907248
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.685100
text:
  <James> i didn't know this sort of thing really happened, but
  the other day i came home from school early and walked in on
  my mom having sex with a ups guy.
  <morningbell>What did you do?
  <James> i hate my dad so i ordered a bunch of shit from the
  internet that will be delivered by ups. :)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907248
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.685143
text:
  ( LiNKz )  I need to grab a good copy of Win2k server
  ( SpiritMaster )  my friend had it but during installation it
  scared him so he installed win me again


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907249
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.685226
text:
  (Damage|rysny) whats the difference between michael jackson
  and acne?
  (tkd-cod|enm1ty) dunno, what?
  (Damage|rysny) acne waits till 13 to come on your face.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907249
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.685321
text:
  <Daze> did you bind and unbind the strings correctly
  <DigDug> Yes.
  <DigDug> unbind msg - hello *msg:hello
  <DigDug> bind msg - myword *msg:d1gdug


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907250
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.685450
text:
  (@Cradly): wouldnt you want to know if your box can be easily
  rooted?
  (@Slyder) Its not entirely my box ;)
  (@def): would you like it to be?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907251
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.685495
text:
  paranoidjanitor: so I used the grep command to search through
  the manual page for the grep command to find the paramater
  that displays a variable number of lines before the actual
  output
  paranoidjanitor: and the paramaters are all on the previous
  lines, so I ended up having to search through the manual by
  hand anyway


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907251
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.685559
text:
  <Myuutsuu> Apparently my brother was oggling at my porn stuff
  and my girlfriend's picture.
  <Tone> Your little brother was FAPPIN' to your girlfriend?
  <Myuutsuu> All of his game files will be mysteriously deleted.
  <Alphonse> Inside several folders.
  <Myuutsuu> He will have a piss stain in his bed the size of
  China.
  <Myuutsuu> He will have his YGO cards stolen.
  <Gojirott> Myuu: Use milk :X
  <Gojirott> or better yet, mayo
  <Myuutsuu> And I will pay one of the kids at his school to
  kick his ass.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907251
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.685650
text:
  <qrg> how do they deal with dice rolling
  <cmplx> you need vr dice. they're usb.
  <cmplx> then you put on these special glvoes
  <cmplx> and roll them acrtoss a vr desk.
  <cmplx> no, ass, you click a button and the dice are rolled
  for you
  <qrg> i meant the randomization
  <qrg> of the dice being rolled
  <orion> i've never heard of a computer spitting out a random
  number
  <orion> or a random quote
  <orion> never.
  <nyisles> qrg: cat /dev/urandom
  <orion> thus, random numbers from dice == impossible
  <orion> it's not like computers generate photorealistic motion
  pictures
  <orion> or perform millions and billions and trillions of
  intense calculations per second
  <orion> i seriously doubt they could simulate die being rolled
  <orion> i mean jesus, they control the stockmarket and most
  modern finance, big business, corporations
  <orion> but as far as picking two random numbers from 1 to 6
  <orion> it's fucking unfathomable.
  <cmplx> until computers can acccurately model the behavior of
  a giant glob of cum entering the earth's atmosphere, computer
  science has failed.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907251
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.685698
text:
  * Rage slaps phucker with his glove
  <@Rage> i challange you to a dule
  <@Phucker> I challenge you to a spelling-contest.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907252
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.685806
text:
  [Rascal] : Well, fuck angelicon, he's weird
  [@Unknown_Source] : Dogs are weird and dumb
  [@djjason] : Agreed
  [@Unknown_Source] : I mean, wave the biscuit, and the dumbass
  dogs comes
  * Unknown_Source waves a biscuit
  [Join (#afterhoursdjs)] : [DJAngelicon]
  [@Unknown_Source] : ...


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907252
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.685856
text:
  <dave> i hit my dick on the sink the other day and it made a
  weird sound so i had to do it again
  <dave> (don't tell tj i said that)
  <dave> (we share a sink)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907253
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.685970
text:
  <ZeroZerv> I need condoms, but I dont want to go to a store to
  pick some up
  <ZeroZerv> i'm timid
  <aNuBiS-> ZeroZerv: timidly pull out
  <Dildosaur> ZeroZerv: get some JB Weld, about a 1/4" ball, and
  shove it down your penile hole, wait for 3 hours
  <ZeroZerv> wtf is that
  <Dildosaur> that should do
  <ZeroZerv> does that work?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907253
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.686090
text:
  <Volksweasel> how odd...everyone appears to be...DEAD!!
  * Volksweasel runs away screaming!
  <Corin> hmm thats the way the thriller video turns out isnt
  it?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907254
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.686176
text:
  <R0SC0E> i bought this returned 60 gig hard drive this weekend
  <R0SC0E> thinking they probably just didn't know how to
  install it
  <R0SC0E> and it'd be fine
  <ScumDog> cheap or something?
  <R0SC0E> and it turned out to be an old 20 gig drive with the
  label swapped
  <R0SC0E> yeah
  <R0SC0E> but the fuckwad left all his old files on it
  <R0SC0E> so i have his name, address, phone number, fax
  number, e-mail
  <R0SC0E> i e-mailed him and was like you dumbshit
  <R0SC0E> he e-mailed back and was like i uh sell computer
  parts so once it leaves my hands i don't know what people do
  with their stuff
  <R0SC0E> i was like what the fuck does that mean, why would
  someone take a 20 gig drive you sold, and put all of these
  letters to lawyers with your return address on them
  <R0SC0E> and call their windows username your name
  <R0SC0E> no reply after that


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907254
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.686241
text:
  <Uki> i don't feel much different, this whole being 21 thing
  <Aphelion_> in that case, you did it wrong. go back and try
  again, this time with more vodka.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907254
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.686290
text:
  <blinden|midnightcleaning> I'm going to bakcup my mp3
  collection....
  <blinden|midnightcleaning> on floppies


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907254
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.686356
text:
  bloodninja: Baby, I been havin a tough night so treat me nice
  aight?
  BritneySpears14: Aight.
  bloodninja: Slip out of those pants baby, yeah.
  BritneySpears14: I slip out of my pants, just for you,
  bloodninja.
  bloodninja: Oh yeah, aight. Aight, I put on my robe and wizard
  hat.
  BritneySpears14: Oh, I like to play dress up.
  bloodninja: Me too baby.
  BritneySpears14: I kiss you softly on your chest.
  bloodninja: I cast Lvl. 3 Eroticism. You turn into a real
  beautiful woman.
  BritneySpears14: Hey...
  bloodninja: I meditate to regain my mana, before casting Lvl.
  8 chicken of the Infinite.
  BritneySpears14: Funny I still don't see it.
  bloodninja: I spend my mana reserves to cast Mighty F*ck of
  the Beyondness.
  BritneySpears14: You are the worst cyber partner ever. This is
  ridiculous.
  bloodninja: Don't f*ck with me bitch, I'm the mightiest
  sorcerer of the lands.
  bloodninja: I steal yo soul and cast Lightning Lvl. 1,000,000
  Your body explodes into a fine bloody mist, because you are
  only a Lvl. 2 Druid.
  BritneySpears14: Don't ever message me again you piece of
  ****.
  bloodninja: Robots are trying to drill my brain but my
  lightning shield inflicts DOA attack, leaving the robots as
  flaming piles of metal.
  bloodninja: King Arthur congratulates me for destroying Dr.
  Robotnik's evil army of Robot Socialist Republics. The cold
  war ends. Reagan steals my accomplishments and makes like it
  was cause of him.
  bloodninja: You still there baby? I think it's getting hard
  now.
  bloodninja: Baby?
  --------------
  BritneySpears14: Ok, are you ready?
  eminemBNJA: Aight, yeah I'm ready.
  BritneySpears14: I like your music Em... Tee hee.
  eminemBNJA: huh huh, yeah, I make it for the ladies.
  BritneySpears14: Mmm, we like it a lot. Let me show you.
  BritneySpears14: I take off your pants, slowly, and massage
  your muscular physique.
  eminemBNJA: Oh I like that Baby. I put on my robe and wizard
  hat.
  BritneySpears14: What the f*ck, I told you not to message me
  again.
  eminemBNJA: Oh ****
  BritneySpears14: I swear if you do it one more time I'm gonna
  report your ISP and say you were sending me kiddie porn you
  f*ck up.
  eminemBNJA: Oh ****
  eminemBNJA: damn I gotta write down your names or something


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907255
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.686410
text:
  <shoryu909> I wanna be the dell kid.
  <@pheer> why?
  <shoryu909> He's the most honest person I know.
  <zeratul> besides Jesus you mean
  <shoryu909> yeah, but jesus has an action figure. Sellout!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907255
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.686451
text:
  wi nd ow zy 2k: your moms a whore and i fucked her in her
  brown eye
  timskie: my moms on florida and her eyes are green!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907255
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.686502
text:
  <n2d2> i didnt put bon jovi in the playlist
  <n2d2> oh my god
  <chaobacca> 11:36:54
  <chaobacca> Bon Jovi - Bad Medicine
  <n2d2> my bon jovi mp3s have become self-aware


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907256
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.686555
text:
  <dane> Why dont the US just drop pigs in Iraq instead of
  cluster bombs?
  <@Basra> because the US worry that it will only feed our
  people and troops....man....embargo `ve starved us....
  <dane> wat?
  <@Basra> do u expect us to drink the oil?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907256
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.686609
text:
  Brianetta_afe > There's this other girl, who says she "values
  out friendship but..."
  Brianetta_afe > and this continues:
  Brianetta_afe > "... I wish it was more."
  Josh_afe > lol, she's talking about your co...oh, never mind.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907257
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.686740
text:
  BuXtonZer0: i dunno why its such a good combo
  BuXtonZer0: the goldfish are crunchy and cheesy, while the
  coke is cold, refreshing, sweet, and breaks down the goldfish
  Benihana420: and your teeth
  Benihana420: at the same time
  BuXtonZer0: another plus


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907257
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.686790
text:
  <emufreak> And now, an interview with Marat Fayzullin.
  <emufreak> How did you get into emulation?
  <RST38h> Well, it started when som*** PLZ PAY $35 TO CONTINUE


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907257
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.686848
text:
  <werxxx> ok..
  <werxxx> lemme put it like this
  <werxxx> how to make my script check dns of a given domain
  <xterm> werxxx: google should be able to help you out.
  <werxxx> google?
  <werxxx> so i'll need to configure my script to parse google
  query result?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907258
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.686907
text:
  <Psi> pancakes!
  <Psi> :D
  <Psi> is there anyone who doesn't like them?
  <Fenris> nazis.
  <Fenris> but you can't blame them.
  <Fenris> the only reason they invaded belgium was for the
  waffles.
  <Fenris> those fuckers love waffles.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907258
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.687003
text:
  <Lestat> @find africa
  <Ganner> @find nigeria
  <Lestat> @find cuban missile crisis
  <Lestat> @find fisherman tim
  <brolli_420> @find SHUT THE FUCK UP


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907258
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.687047
text:
  <abort416> wow i hope u all send the record companies money or
  something cuz its illegal to pirate music and movies and tv
  shows and such


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907259
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.687095
text:
  KompRa: dude, my girlfriend dumped me yesterday..
  Ryan808: itll be fine man
  KompRa: i got so angry last night i went to her girlfriend and
  i fucked her all night long
  KompRa: and the sad thing.. it was on April Fools' Day
  Ryan808: komp, i think your ex was just messin wit you on the
  breakup thing, april fools
  Ryan808: i think u should verify that :\
  KompRa: holy shit


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907259
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.687162
text:
  <InvisableMan> [19:51] <AshleeFukala> i tried to make
  popcorn..
  <InvisableMan> [19:52] <AshleeFukala> and i blwe up my
  mircowave
  <InvisableMan> HOW do you blow up the microwave with popcorn?
  <InvisableMan> it boggles the mind
  <InvisableMan> is that even possible?
  <InvisableMan> i mean, COME ON... i understand, maybe, burning
  the popcorn, at the most catching it on fire.. MAYBE...
  but.....
  <InvisableMan> TO BLOW UP THE MICROWAVE???
  <InvisableMan> *sigh* you humans will be the death of me.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907260
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.687211
text:
  <energize> either we play ghost recon or i make a lame attempt
  to beat off.. realize i'm too loaded and end up passing out
  with my dick in my hand


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907261
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.687256
text:
  SuprJmpmanCarp00: I can't be the only one who finds it funny
  that KFC dumped Jason Alexander for their ads in favor of a
  room full of black people


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907261
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.687306
text:
  <friar> that's a horrific thought
  <friar> the white, pale flesh of your manboobs glistening with
  Bliw soap suds
  <friar> brb wank


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907261
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.687355
text:
  Topic is 'God made drunks so ugly people could get laid.' Set
  by Ac3d
  <Ac3d> man..i think im getting drunk


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907262
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.687405
text:
  <WinX> fat girls that claim to be bi might as well just come
  out and say "i'm horribly desperate for play."


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907262
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.687551
text:
  <MrKurtz> I intend to get tattooed and/or pierced again in
  costa rica
  <MrKurtz> in keeping with tradition
  <JBlitzen\AG> What better to do in the third world then
  experiment with needles


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907263
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.687596
text:
  <SiFL> wow i was just looking at something and thought to
  myself, this is kool, i better get a screenshot, then i
  realized i was just looking at it.... it wasnt on my comp


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907263
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.687695
text:
  <TheMyst> hey, anyone here use a radar detector?
  <Customz> yes why myst?
  <Customz> i only use it so i know when to stash the blunt
  <Customz> fuck speeding


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907264
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.687749
text:
  <GaveUp> i stopped skate boarding when i started dirtbiking
  <YenSid> ah yea, you can really injure yourself like that
  <GaveUp> hehe i've totalled three bikes but the worst injuries
  i've ever had were self-inflicted ... go figure ;P
  <webby_g> stupidity related injuries are always the best


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907264
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.687841
text:
  Lunatic: All those opposed to the patriot act raise your right
  hand
  Lunatic: Raise your hand high
  Lunatic: Now raise the other one
  Lunatic: Hands behind your back
  Lunatic: you're under arrest for treason


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907264
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.687889
text:
  <biXen> LMAO, I got kicked from DC because of animal porn?
  WTF?
  <biXen> I dont have any animal porn!
  <biXen> well I guess for some people movies that has black
  guys in them, they can go as animals


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907265
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.687939
text:
  <BlackDeth> warez b dum
  <BlackDeth> go traffic cocaine
  <BlackDeth> if you want to traffic illegal goods
  <BlackDeth> do smth useful


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907265
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.687991
text:
  <Veers> I guess they don't teach bathroom manners in Africa
  <Donitz> Veers, newsflash, they don't have bathrooms in
  Africa.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907265
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.688041
text:
  <xScoobyxDoo42ox> "My name is Saddam Hussein. I am the
  president of Iraq and I want to negotiate," he told the US
  troops in English, according to Major Bryan Reed, operations
  officer for the 1st Brigade, 4th Infantry Division.
  <xScoobyxDoo42ox> hahaha
  <xScoobyxDoo42ox> i used that on the cops last week


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907266
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.688115
text:
  *** Pikachu has joined #Distro
  <kurai> Gah.  Fucken' Pokemon crap - hate it.
  <kurai> Some twat in the office thought it would be "cute and
  friendly" to name all the servers etc after bloody Pokemon
  characters.
  <kurai> The incident that mainly brought about this hatred was
  the time a particular SQL server fell over (yet again)...
  <kurai> So I shout across the (full) office to a colleague "Oi
  ! Pikachu's just gone down on me again !"
  <kurai> Mind you - it was amusing seeing one dumb bint
  snorting coffee out of her nose she was laughing so hard.
  <Pikachu> ? ! I don't go down on pppl !!
  <kurai> SO you are small, yellow, annoying *and* don't give
  head ?
  <kurai> What a pointless life - top yourself right now.
  *** Pikachu Quit (Ping timeout)
  <basto> Wow - you are like some evil mind controlling Guru or
  somthin'


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907266
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.688170
text:
  *** Joins: SYch0 (Zack@pm-5-37.tellink.net)
  <SYch0> coo
  <SYch0> just put my old computer in my new case
  <ikk|q3a> wow!
  <TheFlux2k> duz it magically run faster?
  <SYch0> butholes
  <SYch0> wtf do I even talk to u ppl
  *** Quits: SYch0 ( <k!15b7>)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907266
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.688217
text:
  <rifkin> Happy Flag day everyone
  <rifkin> the US army is 231 years old today
  <rifkin> to celebrate I am leeching wireless from some iraqi
  in baghdad


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907266
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.688269
text:
  <Personman> So pieces of binary information are bits...
  <Personman> And ternary ones are trits...
  <Personman> But that's far enough, I think.
  <Personman> When we get to base 4, we should call it quits.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907267
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.688316
text:
  thrasher: I'm thinking of starting a business in california
  thrasher: it would be a socialist abortion clinic and pot
  dispensary, with new gay marriage chapel
  kthxglhf: And dry cleaning
  thrasher: why dry cleaning?
  kthxglhf: so u can reuse coat hangers


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907267
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.688410
text:
  <bill-s> why is evryone on the internets suddenly preoccupied
  if I wipe front-to-back or back-to-front?
  <BoltBait> Sounds to me like SOMEONE wipes the wrong
  direction. :D
  <bill-s> STFU!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907267
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.688468
text:
  <irq> so i was spanking-the-monkey for all it was worth and
  just about to cum
  <irq> when my dad bangs on the door
  <irq> i say "i'm comming"
  <irq> and my dad says "that wont help you open the door"
  <irq> now i am going to need theorpy for life!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907268
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.688523
text:
  <cancerpass> ever watched the monty python show/movies?
  <over-thurr> yeah he's a very funny guy!
  <cancerpass> i'll take that as a no


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907269
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.688714
text:
  <undrewb> I'm gonna make my thesis opensource so developers
  all round the world can work on it for me


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907269
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.688779
text:
  * hunterkll kneels and prays liek a good knight
  <hunterkll> hunterkll: you have earned 10 virtue points and 5
  strengthpoints
  <hunterkll> and access to two hints
  <hunterkll> heh :D
  <jgannon> However, you still have -8 charisma.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907269
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.688857
text:
  <spinks> I'm pretty sure dad is reconsidering sending me to
  drama classes
  <maguiness> ?
  <maguiness> explain
  <spinks> well tonight i was home alone for most of the night.
  Mum was with my little brothers in singleton, out to dinner
  for my uncle's birthday
  <spinks> my older brother is in gloucester for the next few
  days
  <spinks> and dad was at karate till about 8 and thus i had to
  cook tea
  <spinks> of course i get a brilliant theatrical idea in my
  head just to make things a little awkward when dad comes home
  <spinks> i cook some pretty basic fuckign stuff, 2 pies and
  some 2 minute noodles
  <spinks> but i garnish the fuck out of them with salads and
  shit, and put them on the good china, got the good cutlery
  out, wine glasses filled with red wine, the dinenr candles,
  the nice place mats, all of it
  <spinks> a nice romantic dinner
  <spinks> dad got home and i lit the candles, got dressed in my
  suit and tie, nice saphire-blue micro-fibre shirt, placed the
  plates opposite one another and turned all the lights off
  <spinks> I sat there waiting, folded my hands nicely and dad
  walked through the door, blinked coz of the low light and just
  stared at me
  <spinks> then he just slowly walked to his room, where i'd
  laid a trail of fake rose petals down the hallway to his room
  <spinks> GOD i will never forget the look on his face


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907270
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.688904
text:
  * Cybertrx is 5'3, 198 pounds, ugly, balding, highly skilled
  programmer. All my shirts are yellow with cumstains. I am
  seeking a tall, gorgeous, stunningly hot babe in her early 20s
  with an amazing rack and thick luxurious blond hair. /msg me


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907270
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.689001
text:
  <joshua_> C ECE DBRY AOT URP YDAY TCBE RU YRPYGP.!
  <joshua_> BRYDCBI CO ,RPYDF RU YDAY TCBE UR YRPYGP.!
  <joshua_> AaAAAAAAAAAAAAAACC.............................!
  <joshua_> AND FUCK YOU TOO MR. DVORAK


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907271
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.689104
text:
  MorningQueen: Why are you against abortion?
  MassHypnosisJoe: I'm just against women making choices


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907271
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.689159
text:
  <@skold> needle hurt like hell
  <phreaked> dude.. i've had braces caught into my lip
  <@skold> he sews up the artery and starts going to work on my
  arm
  <@skold> wow jer i feel your pain
  <@skold> anyhow


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907271
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.689204
text:
  <ap> i have this new way of jacking off now. i blow my load on
  notebook paper. then just make a paper airplane and fly it out
  my window


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907272
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.689307
text:
  <Adar> "If you handle an envelope and some white powder spills
  out, you should _____________?"
  <Boog|Happy> "Sniff it?"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907272
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.689357
text:
  <Kaotic> I'm probably going to have to get wireless
  eventually, my brother keeps punching "network holes" in the
  walls


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907272
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.689411
text:
  <demonrest> anyone know of a site that would be good to find
  out if there is a .net activation bypass?
  <Jaykul> demonrest?
  <Jaykul> you're not asking for warez HERE, are you?
  <Daemon> he already got the warez
  <Daemon> he needs the crack


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907273
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.689453
text:
  (|Lenore|) why does windows even bother giving estimates? the
  times change by 5 minutes every thirty seconds...


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907273
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.689503
text:
  CHz16: So, I was trying to figure out why I keep playing Super
  Monkey Ball 2.
  CHz16: Was it the puzzles? The action? The vibrant landscapes?
  CHz16: And then I realized, I didn't need an excuse.
  CHz16: You don't need to rationalize making monkeys encased in
  clear, plastic balls fall off a level into a lake of fiery
  death.
  mactigerz: rofl
  CHz16: I just hope the ASPCA doesn't find out.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907273
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.689569
text:
  <Kazz> I will only baby talk to my kid.
  <Kazz> Even when he's 40.
  <JDigital> hee
  <Kazz> "How's my cutest little sweet baby pie pumpkinheeeead?"
  <Kazz> "Fuck off, dad."
  <Lee-Ham> Issum wiggle umpkins?
  * Silkenray laughs
  <Kashan> I'm going to teach my kid the wrong words


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907273
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.689619
text:
  <@GPF> It's normal to experiment with your friends.  What you
  need is an older man to help you experiment wisely.  Please
  call (232) 555-8338 and ask for Dave.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907274
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.689689
text:
  <SpAz> watch me rap
  <SpAz> <rap>
  <SpAz> yo yo yo
  <SpAz> nigga bitch hoe
  <SpAz> slap fuck bling
  <SpAz> bling eskalizzle beeoch
  <SpAz> yo
  <SpAz> word.
  <SpAz> </rap>
  * McBilliam applauds
  <Wyder> glad to see you listen to music.... (sarcastic)
  <SpAz> thank you my record contract is in the mail with def
  jamz


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907274
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.689743
text:
  |cmf> using semantics to mask the problems of our world is
  only putting a bandaid on a bullet wound
  |pedXing> yeah
  |pedXing> but
  |pedXing> it's a fuzzy bandaid, with cartoon characters on it.
  |pedXing> which is really better than nothing.
  |cmf> it sure is


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907274
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.689789
text:
  Quaestor> how frequently does a question need to be asked to
  be considered a Frequently Asked Question?
  Archon11> 7 times in the US and 11 in Canada. The European
  Union is considering a common number of five, but Great
  Britain refuses to comply and insists on using its own number,
  six. China does not allow questions except in Hong Kong.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907274
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.689841
text:
  *** Joins: Nighters
  (mmckesso@HSE-Toronto-ppp179585.sympatico.ca)
  <Temujin> NIGHT
  <Temujin> Perhaps you can arbitrate this disagreement.
  <Nighters> Temujin loses.
  <Nighters> disagreement arbitrated.
  <Temujin> GODDAMMIT


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907275
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.689892
text:
  <BladeXT> hehe www.geekissues.org is a pretty cool site

  <Videl17> wtf does Gee Kiss Ues mean?

  <BladeXT> *sigh*


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907275
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.689943
text:
  <KMFDM> Your rank out of 1918856 total users is: 411951st
  place
  <bocz> aha whats that for
  <bocz> a beauty contest?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907275
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.689990
text:
  <Current> Hey, in San Francisco, you don't leave dogs with
  tags unattended in Chinatown, because it just marks them as
  edible.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907276
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.690039
text:
  <lichen> hahah i love spic
  <lichen> me and him have this special bond
  <Avram> KY jelly is a lubricant, not an adhesive


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907276
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.690098
text:
  <Dack Falu> WTF, there are Bomberman fanfics
  <Dack Falu> Did that shit have a storyline?
  <Stultus> Someone's probably written a fanfic for Tetris
  <Saturn V> THE L BLOCK TAKES ME BY THE HAND AND PLUGNES ITSELF
  NEATLY INTO ME, FORMING A LINE
  <Saturn V> I MOAN BUT THEN PART OF ME VANISHES
  <Saturn V> FOREVER.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907276
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.690194
text:
  <cov\sick> Solitarie almost never crashes. They should employ
  the person who wrote it to head the WinNT team.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907277
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.690253
text:
  <+phU|CrUM> i woke up to the sound of rain of the roof
  <+phU|CrUM> layed in bed and listend to it for a couple of
  minutes then rememberd that i left my windows down in the car
  <+BalefireX> that would have been funny to watch
  <+phU|CrUM> what? me sprint out of bed, run outside half
  asleep, realize that i forgot my keys, slip in the mud and
  almost fall on my face turning around, get inside, grab my
  keys, sprint back outside and close my windows?
  <+phU|CrUM> naw, that wouldnt have been funny to watch
  <+BalefireX> you realize that your car would have been just as
  wet had you taken your time to get dressed and calmly walk out
  and do it?
  <+phU|CrUM> you see, now i realize that... but when im half
  asleep im like 10x as dumb as i usually am
  <+BalefireX> im amazed you remembered to breathe


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907277
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.690307
text:
  <sisko> Q. What's the height of conceit?
  <sisko> A. Having an orgasm and calling out your own name.
  <mmm> i do that
  <mmm> "oh god"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907278
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.690452
text:
  <fugi> a friend of mine just got a dog from a vietnamese
  family today, I suggested he name it Chewy.
  <b0rked> why?
  <fugi> why else would vietnamese get rid of a dog?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907278
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.690502
text:
  <Tarkaan> Gerbil, I've spent the past three months and about
  $10,000 preparing for this fucking war
  <Tarkaan> although the majority of that was buying property in
  Canada
  <Tarkaan> But I also got a camp stove


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907278
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.690584
text:
  <Ouroboros> Has anyone ever logged into dev0n's FTP?
  <Affe> ouro: that some kind of sexual innuendo?
  <xpander> is that a euphemism?
  <Ouroboros> Possibly
  <Ouroboros> Shhh
  <Ouroboros> I try to be subtle about these things.
  <Affe> in that case, i 'log into dev0ns ftp' all the time
  <Ouroboros> Yeah, she gave me her "login" but she won't reply
  to my "/msgs"
  <Affe> dude i had 'sex' with her in the 'butt' the other day
  <Affe> oh wait
  <Affe> we're being subtle


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907279
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.690644
text:
  <Erodice> 1 time last year we just had freezing rain and
  people where goin' 60-70 mps over the bridge form where i live
  to the main city New Bern. you never seen so many morons
  slipin' an' swervin' and wouldn't anyone slow down it was
  insane
  <Bligyith> On the fire department we call those return
  customers
  <Bligyith> ...well not really, but I do


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907279
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.690694
text:
  <punchcard_w0rk> i think i will form a computer addiction
  recovery group.
  <punchcard_w0rk> call it "users no longer enslaved to
  electronic technology"
  <punchcard_w0rk> or UnLeet


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907279
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.690741
text:
  <@HndlWCare> I just got email from postmaster@adelphia.net
  telling the mailbox for postmaster@adelphia.net is over quota,
  and if I feel this message is in error I should reply to
  postmaster@adelphia.net


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907279
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.690789
text:
  <Drago> hey random, ya want to test something for me?
  <random> if its long, tubular, made out of plastic and gently
  vibrates..... then no. But if its some code.. ok


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907280
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.690839
text:
  <Thermo-nC-> Why do newbies use X in thier names ?
  <-=X=-> I'm nota n00b you fucking mofo fucker!
  <Thermo-nC-> I rest my case ;E


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907280
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.690883
text:
  beauty_fades_stupid_ls_forever: holy crap, my mom is online!!
  citygirl30_56308: lmao
  cherbare36: lol
  beauty_fades_stupid_ls_forever: ok...she didnt say hi to me..
  beauty_fades_stupid_ls_forever: poor mom, she gets so lost
  when you hand her a keyboard and a mouse
  soooopafox: LoL my grammy is so adorable with the puter.
  beauty_fades_stupid_ls_forever: now when you hand my mom a
  remote, a phone and a credit card, she goes to town...
  soooopafox: LoL @ QVC


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907280
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.690942
text:
  <eric> awright spam u can use
  <eric> "Like to see hot jizz spit all over an unsuspecting
  teen's face? These young teen girls love taking hot cum right
  in the face."
  <siva> "unsuspecting"?
  <eric> DAD CAN I GO TO THE MALL I NEED SOME NEW BARETTES AND %
  (#*&%!( HOLY GOD


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907281
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.691002
text:
  <hitman> I met some dude at the last meet
  <hitman> and I'm like
  <hitman> "do you ever go on irc?"
  <hitman> and he's like
  <hitman> "I did once, but this dude hitman kept talking smack"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907281
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.691052
text:
  <Ixnorp> saber has a job?
  <Zanok> yeah
  <ducks> YES I HAVE HAD THIS JOB FOR ABOUT FOUR YEARS NOW
  <Zanok> he manually masturbates animals for artificial
  insemination


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907281
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.691162
text:
  Baumann: you're like... british and stuff, right
  Kevin Smith: like....and stuff, yes
  Baumann: so you know soccer?
  Baumann: I know, that's like saying "You're american, right?
  ...so you're fat."
  Kevin Smith: football
  Kevin Smith: vaguely
  Baumann: Pay attention to the world cup any?
  Kevin Smith: there's a world cup?
  Baumann: you don't think the world just floats in space, do
  you?
  Kevin Smith: pretty much
  Baumann: Everyone knows that it sits in a cup
  Baumann: That's why no one lives in antartica
  Baumann: ...or something
  Kevin Smith: right
  Baumann: Well, I'm just pissed that Zidane got the golden ball
  Kevin Smith: ok, I have no idea what the golden ball is
  Kevin Smith: but it sounds impractical
  Baumann: yeah, they don't even actually use it
  Baumann: man... now I want to visit antarctica
  Kevin Smith: \o/


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907282
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.691207
text:
  onkeybutt87: I heard this commercial on the TV
  onkeybutt87: from a door-store
  onkeybutt87: and the guy refers to it as an "Entry system"
  Changa177: lol
  onkeybutt87: gotta be politically correct


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907282
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.691303
text:
  <Ariela> I want a man that is like a purse: looks good on your
  arm, carries your things, and hopefully matches your shoes.
  <Nap> I want a woman who's like a good pair of shoes: looks
  good, provides support, and doesn't recite stupid analogies.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907283
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.691396
text:
  TheGodfather2613: i mean if you're going to have upside down
  crosses you should also have a desecrated star of david and an
  upside down crescent moon as well as someone bitch slapping
  krishna


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907283
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.691459
text:
  * Joins: kickurass
  *** wes changes the topic to 'latest: phoenix 2.1 gamecobe
  loader'
  *** wes changes the topic to 'latest: phoenix 2.1 gamecube
  looder'
  <wes> shit, that i suck lol.
  *** wes changes the topic to 'update: latest phoenix 2.1
  loader for gamecube'
  <kickurass> can someone tell me what's the latest version of
  the phoenix loader is???


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907283
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.691503
text:
  [dcg] I love how someone links a picture of a woman with a
  penis and it turns into a discussion about monitor resolution


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907284
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.691558
text:
  (lupin) yeah
  (lupin) I'm pissed
  (lupin) I went to Wal Mart and they stopped me because I had a
  backpack
  (lupin) and they said "We'll have to hold that for you because
  of recent events"
  (lupin) and I said "Listen, if I were a terrorist, I think I'd
  pick a better place to bomb or infect than a backwater
  WalMart.  I'd at least go hit the Super Wal Mart in Bryan
  because I could go get McDonalds on the way to blowing it up."
  (lupin) and they let me keep my bag


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907284
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.691601
text:
  (@JH) you know you can get stuff engraved on an iPod? I was
  thinking about this..
  (@JH) RIAA v. JH - Exhibit A


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907286
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.691655
text:
  <iggz[leafs]>
  GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLL
  <Skand|Hockey_Ninja|>
  CRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPPPPPPPPPPPPPP
  <enisoc> it's easy to tell what side everyone's on


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907286
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.691715
text:
  <overkill_78> So this chick came over today.
  <overkill_78> We talked for hours.
  <overkill_78> Then she went to go take a piss.
  <overkill_78> I busted in on her while she was pissing, and
  she got mad at me.
  <overkill_78> So I trapped her in my room and set my room on
  fire.
  <overkill_78> Fucking bitch is dead now.
  <camdaman86> How are you not in jail?
  <overkill_78> It was in The Sims.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907286
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.691778
text:
  <Exelcesior> I take it ALLL back about greenpeace type
  fanatics
  <Exelcesior> no offence Ed
  <Ed> hmm?
  <Exelcesior> i was feeling suicidally bored so I visited a
  friend who's pretty enviro friendly
  <Exelcesior> and I was talking to him as he watered his lawn,
  when this car pulled up
  <Exelcesior> and this fat guy mooned him
  <Exelcesior> so he screamed "FUCK! BEACHED WHALE!!" and turned
  the hose on him
  <Ed> well, you have to keep them hydrated


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907286
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.691830
text:
  <Yawgatog> You haven't lived until you've chugged a bottle of
  rubbing alcohol.
  <Yawgatog> You probably haven't died until then, either.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907287
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.691874
text:
  <WarrioR> The Weakest Link) is fascinating program. They ask a
  bunch of people questions and they keep getting rid of the
  dumbest person, so just the smartest person is left. It is
  kind of the opposite way we elect a president.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907287
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.691923
text:
  <Meke|Sleep> Lates, thanks.  I'll tell the people of the world
  that IRCops aren't big bad ogres who like to hurt innocent
  pieces of cheese with their claws.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907287
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.691983
text:
  <andrewg> eps will make you drop the soap on command
  <andrewg> AND
  <andrewg> insert a tracking device
  <djrand>  good god
  <djrand>  i think thats enough
  <@epic_>  lol
  <epic_>   Did we make you blush rand?
  <epic_>   your virgin ears.
  <djrand>  indeed
  <epic_>   should put comdoms on them..   wont catch hearing
  aids.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907288
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.692085
text:
  <JohnMaron7> JaySea We believe that the Apostles at the Last
  Supper were not drinking wine, for Jesus said to them "This is
  My BLOOD".
  <JaySea> JohnMaron7: "Oh no!  There's blood in my alcohol
  system!"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907288
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.692131
text:
  Xith: I didn't know shit could be digitaly transfered
  UPC747|Rob: yeah
  BouncyFish: It's called the internet.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907288
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.692177
text:
  <ljlane> I need to do a non-greedy scan on a few gigs of data
  for a pattern containing hex and some text. Ideas?
  <RichiH> ljlane: suicide?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907289
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.692222
text:
  <cast> see, the roof falling on me is the least of my problems
  here, the whole building going from |^| to /^/ to ___ is my
  problem


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907289
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.692271
text:
  --> hindenburg (~ash@cloaked.rr.com) has joined #overclockers
  <a474645> hindenburg like the german zeppelin disaster?
  <hindenburg> what can i say
  <hindenburg> blimpin aint easy


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907289
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.692320
text:
  Amul Muzz said:
  Why do I get the feeling that this is really a mob, just
  waiting for someone to say something they do not agree with?
  chrismjr said:
  That's the best description for the internet I've ever heard


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907290
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.692373
text:
  <Hydra> * penguin has joined #12-15yrz
  <Hydra> <penguin> any chicks there
  <Hydra> lol
  <Kevorkian> what scares me hydra, is that you are in that
  channel


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907290
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.692428
text:
  <@tdfischer> friggin landlord finally cached my check
  <+ajanata> tdfischer: I would think the proper analogy is they
  finally flushed the buffer the check was in :p
  <+ajanata> caching the check would make things worse
  <@tdfischer> 'doh
  <@tdfischer> thats a pretty awesome typo


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907290
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.692480
text:
  <MoF0-> hmm
  <MoF0-> why has nortons said all my keygen are " at risk
  files"
  <Blaqeagle> because norton is like that schizophrenic kid at
  school who
  keeps on yelling out in class shit about flying
  cows or
  something when your trying to do your work
  <Blaqeagle> occasionally he actually yells out something
  coherent, but
  you suspected it anyway


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907291
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.692572
text:
  <Vulpes> I know somewhere out there is a man or woman willing
  to have sex with me while I remain on IRC.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907291
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.692624
text:
  <jome> I suppose there are bad coders, there are really bad
  coders, there are fucking retards, and there's coders writing
  lines like this: $resultscode = $resultscode - 0;
  <jome> Serious, that's an actual line from a script I'm going
  to rewrite..


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907291
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.692673
text:
  <Wazm> I was photographed in my natural environment today.
  <Wazm> some photographers from the admissions office working
  on some brochure for UNF took 60 photographs of me programming


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907291
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.692751
text:
  <evilive> I've got the crime of the century
  <evilive> we'll say we're offering free chicken as a
  promotion, right?
  <evilive> then when the niggers show up we'll shoot them and
  take their gold teeth.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907292
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.692866
text:
  <DizzDvl> didja know that a bee's penis breaks off in the
  queen and she saves it for later?
  <rabbit> saves it for later for what?
  <DizzDvl> saves it for later when she needs to fertilize eggs
  <MoouadDib> if the queen's next lover isn't as good she slaps
  him with the penis of previous lovers


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907292
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.692912
text:
  <b-ho> asian teen with cam here willing to show in netmeeting
  for all-male porn download in real player format


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907293
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.693016
text:
  <]Di[ein> seriously..... imma put 2x turbos....nos....air
  intake...... get that pos lowered even though it is already
  lowered
  <]Di[ein> get some 5's
  <]Di[ein> (it has go cart wheels)
  <Vandium> A FESTIVA
  <Vandium> ROFL!
  <]Di[ein> the only car in the world where u get a buy one get
  one free deal!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907293
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.693130
text:
  <Antimatter> for a moment I thought M$ was going into the arms
  contracting business there
  <Antimatter> oh, wait. they are, aren't they
  <Antimatter> battleships running Windows... *shudder*
  <NightmareBlade> o-O
  <Antimatter> yes, they're pushing to get windows used in
  control systems for ships & stuff
  <Antimatter> gives a new dimension to "blue screen of death"
  <Antimatter> "Uh-oh, the fire control computer got infected
  with a virus"
  <NightmareBlade> ***WARNING*** U.S.S New Jersey could not load
  targetting codes. Please insert your Windows 98 SE cd into b:


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907294
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.693266
text:
  <Nermaldrunk> alcohol is so comforting
  <Austin> Yeah, vomit's just like a warm blanket, only in
  liquid form.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907295
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.693366
text:
  <Aussiedog> lol you know what happend in myers the otherday
  <Aussiedog> i was in there and i go.. wow this is a cool cd,
  *talks to shopkeeper* hey what is this cd
  <Aussiedog> she gives me it and asks me if i am interested in
  buying
  <Aussiedog> and i go nar.. i just wanna kniow what songs are
  on it so i can download them
  <Aussiedog> she was so pissed


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907295
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.693417
text:
  <ph0x_> the best way to optimize a program for space is to
  remove all spaces and tabs from the source code
  <ph0x_> also don't use many lines,write everything on one
  single line


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907295
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.693461
text:
  <solo> Think about a time in your life which you had the most
  fun, well....then picture work being the total opposite


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907296
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.693511
text:
  <ClayJar_Zzz> AAAAAAAARGH!! I just saw a comercial for
  Disney's Finding Nemo on ice, and let me tell you, it was
  exceedingly disturbing.
  <pjpreb> how so?
  <ClahJar_Zzz> It was like seeing big fish impaled on ice
  skating mimes.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907296
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.693559
text:
  <infinitySPZ> Pong is probably the best designed shooter game
  in the world.
  <infinitySPZ> It's the only one that is made so that if you
  camp, you die.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907297
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.693656
text:
  <Tyranu[work]> tried to have a customer complaint about a
  mouse that only worked to the sides and not up and down....
  found out later that he didn't move the mouse forward/
  backwards but rather lifted it up and down... a part of me
  died that day


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907297
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.693757
text:
  <m477[Lain]> Customer: "I don't have a cdrom drive, and the CD
  is too big to fit in the floppy drive. And the software store
  won't take it back. So you have to help me install this,
  because it's all your fault. If you had sold me the version of
  Windows I wanted, I wouldn't have had to buy Windows 95."


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907297
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.693854
text:
  <Duskmon> It must have blown to be one of the first outsiders
  to convert to Christianity.
  <Duskmon> Like, you're reading through the Bible for the first
  time, and then a bunch of Hebrews burst into your Church
  shouting "CAIN KILLS ABEL IN GENESIS FOUR VERSE EIGHT!"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907298
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.693902
text:
  <Yokujou`> iPhone autocorrect: Because "Asperger's Cock" is
  exactly what you were trying to convey.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907298
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.693950
text:
  <SiZZuRp> this is from www.pk-hq.com
  <SiZZuRp> Most users ever online was 138 on 02-14-2002 at
  13:33.
  <SiZZURp> a sad valentines day......... date much?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907299
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.694080
text:
  <O.J.> Radio interview quote from Marine Corps General
  Reinwald and a female radio host. He wants to host some boy
  scouts at the training center for some practise excercises. As
  follows
  <FEMALE INTERVIEWER>: So, General Reinwald, what things are
  you going to teach these young boys when they visit your base?
  <GENERAL REINWALD>: We're going to teach them climbing,
  canoeing, archery, and shooting.
  <FEMALE INTERVIEWER>: Shooting! That's a bit irresponsible,
  isn't it?
  <GENERAL REINWALD>: I don't see why, they'll be properly
  supervised on the rifle range.
  <FEMALE INTERVIEWER>: Don't you admit that this is a terribly
  dangerous activity to be teaching children?
  <GENERAL REINWALD>: I don't see how. We will be teaching them
  proper rifle discipline before they even touch a firearm.
  <FEMALE INTERVIEWER>: But you're equipping them to become
  violent killers.
  <GENERAL REINWALD>: Well, you're equipped to be a prostitute,
  but you're not one, are you?
  The radio went silent and the interview ended. You gotta love
  the Marines!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907299
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.694127
text:
  punkass keith: did i tell you my aborted baby idea?
  ecj: no what is it
  punkass keith: if i was a girl, i would get pregnant as many
  times as possible, then have abortions after the third month
  of beign pregnat so i would deliver a potatoe sized 1/3
  developed dead fetus, then i would take the fetus, put it in a
  jar of perservative liquid and put it on a shelf in a secret
  room in my house.  and i would do it until i had so many the
  rooms walls were nothign but potatoe sized aborted fetuses.
  then i would have a kid and when they're bad i would make them
  sit in the fetus room and remind them of how easy i could have
  aborted their ass.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907299
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.694179
text:
  <jimnathan> fuck fuck fuck... why does bash.org keep posting
  those roses are red bastardizations?
  <jimnathan> newsflash!! theyre not funny
  <jimnathan> the only way it could possibly get worse is if
  someone made a poem like that completely in 1337
  <Fraeon> R0535 4R3 R3D, V10l375 4R3 BLU3, 1337 P037RY 5UCK5,
  BU7 50 D0 Y0U?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907299
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.694241
text:
  <<UT> ho//\rzd> just an option:
  <<UT> ho//\rzd>  you tell me where your sentence ends, that
  would help. ;D
  <F3AR | Bailey> i
  <F3AR | Bailey> broke
  <F3AR | Bailey> my
  <F3AR | Bailey> space
  <F3AR | Bailey> bar
  <F3AR | Bailey> lol


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907300
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.694297
text:
  <Navy|Scholar> I suppose you people have heard about the
  Semantic Web?
  <east> yes
  <Brawler> Nevar
  <east> if you're talking about semantic markup, yes
  <ignatios> yeah
  <Hokaloogie> Is that something to do with Jews?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907301
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.694478
text:
  <@i-node> I thought battlenet checked to see if you were
  korean
  <@i-node> if(iskorean()){acceptconnection();}


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907301
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.694572
text:
  <aoe2junkie> i wonder what my dog tries to say to me when he
  barks
  <Karath-Din> "stop touching me there"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907302
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.694722
text:
  <Chronoclone> Kathleen is on the riding mower and accidentally
  sucks up my sheet.
  <Chronoclone> My dad and I tip over the mower and rip the
  sheet out.
  <Chronoclone> While she's out chasing the dog because she said
  we could trust him without a leash.
  <Chronoclone> My dad agrees that she's crazy and shouldn't
  have been right there with the damn mower.
  <Wiggles> How is this person still alive?
  <Aki> The FBI is keeping her alive to harness Darwin's
  in-grave rotation as a power source for future generations.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907303
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.694772
text:
  <CptSage> Awesome error message
  <CptSage> Best one ever
  <CptSage> A network error has occured. This computer's
  Internet connection appears to be online. (-66559).


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907303
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.694816
text:
  <trccccc> I was going down on this one girl once.... and her
  clit was the size of my pinkie... I was all DAMN and exscused
  myself and went back down to the party


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907303
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.694868
text:
  <triky> my dad, to this day, says he was in vietnam. and i'm
  like... dude... that's clinton oklahoma you were in. you
  joined the airforce so you wouldn't get drafted into the army
  and die
  <triky> the old man then learned computer programming
  <triky> and wrote the very famous program that made kentucky
  fried chicken cash registers work


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907303
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.694912
text:
  <LunchPailTree> the moral of this story is: if you have no
  morals, go get yourself a 12 year old friend so you can fuck
  her after you drug her


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907304
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.695068
text:
  <Tramtrist> anyone seen vaun?(fucko?)
  <Tramtrist> someone post on vn and tell him to get in here pzl
  (plz)
  <Mardom> i saw him giving sexual favors to men
  <Tramtrist> k
  <Tramtrist> anyone not a complete tard see him?
  <Mardom> haha
  <Mardom> good luck finding one of those in here
  <Tramtrist> yeah ;/


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907304
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.695140
text:
  <tehron> i have a question about the english language: are
  parcel and packet synonym in any way?
  <sabretooth> yes
  <sabretooth> packet is generally smaller
  <sabretooth> but they can be used interchangeably even with a
  large packet and a small parcel :)
  <tehron> hm.. :P
  <tehron> i think i can't receive parcels
  <sabretooth> Well if you're sending them over TCP probably not
  <tehron> :P very helpful
  <sabretooth> if you're sending them by UDP, UPS or Royal Mail
  however they'll likely be dropped anyway


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907305
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.695186
text:
  isotec: so my dad decides to be nice and put a chocolate on
  top of my LCD monitor (its one of thoes ones with booze in it
  isotec: so i come by l8r and im like cool
  isotec: i pick it up as as i do so it starts to drip on the
  top of the monitor and some booze leaks out
  isotec: im thinking well that was totaly smart dad now i have
  whisky or somthing and chocolate oozing around up there
  isotec: but im like hey cant let that chocolate go to waste
  isotec: i start to lick up the tasty mess and when im in mid
  lick my dad walks in and is like "Jesus son, i know you many
  like your computer but this is just rediculous!"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907306
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.695330
text:
  <Darth-Phenom> So Sumez...how was Nadine?
  <Sumez> Nice
  <Sumez> She liked big cocks
  <Sumez> And she did oral
  <Yolkhead> Luckily you are a big cock then.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907306
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.695390
text:
  <MrSaturn> oh yeah, and I've run a shopping cart into John
  Romero
  <MrSaturn> on accident, of course ... but when I saw who it
  was, I almost did it again
  <MrSaturn> my first thought was "damn slow hippie woman"
  <MrSaturn> then he turns around.
  <Trikky_Dikk> After he turned around, I still would have
  thought, "Damn slow hippie woman."


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907306
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.695488
text:
  <Rhesirus|Work> yah, i could see how using a code would
  activate some buggy code that would cause it to malfunction, i
  don't see any way it could physically damage the media
  <Tamutnefret> The special "read CD as if vinyl" code


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907307
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.695533
text:
  <phr0work> using linux is like using windows, except every
  time you try to do something like install a program or a
  driver or set a different resolution, a big black dude runs in
  and kicks you in the side of the head


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907307
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.695591
text:
  <datacide> well
  <datacide> and always remember the old saying...
  <datacide> no cock is as hard as life
  <Rjx> I've never heard that one
  <debutante> uh
  <debutante> me either
  <debutante> FREAK
  <Rjx> I think that should have been the line in Forrest Gump


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907308
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.695730
text:
  <rutabaga> I remember one tiem I was trickortreating and this
  guy ansered the door in assless chaps and a cowboy hat
  <rutabaga> that was the scaeryist haloween evar


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907308
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.695784
text:
  <the_Speed_Bump> I can't imagine a conversation that covers
  both philosophy and shit without being terribly disjointed.
  <the_Speed_Bump> "So, what do you think of God?" "I just took
  the hugest shit ever!"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907309
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.695887
text:
  <Yoggit> No, it sucks, there's all these little kids, and they
  always try to talk to me.
  <leeberace> i like kids
  <Yoggit> I like kids, when they're being quiet and not moving.
  <leeberace> those are dead kids
  <leeberace> that doesn't really count


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907309
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.695933
text:
  <BeLLa`> does sperm die when it hits the air, msg me if u know
  <carcin0gen-> sounds like someone got a 3 pointer


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907311
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.696079
text:
  <rancid_beaver> im sick and tired of this relationshit
  <rancid_beaver> relationship*
  <rancid_beaver> how the fuck did i mispell that?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907311
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.696133
text:
  <FFGnome> I got an E-mail from someone weird who wants to
  protect my Domain Name.
  <FFGnome> I DON'T EVEN HAVE ONE! ^_^
  <Hellspawn> Send them someone elses domain
  <Hellspawn> tell them its already been stolen
  <Hellspawn> and you will sign up if they get you it back


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907313
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.696370
text:
  *** Joins: azninvazn
  [mcgruff] [mp3] abba - dancing queen @ 192 kbps
  [owner] now playing: geri halliwell - it's rainin' men.mp3
  [owner] you  just got one-upped gruff
  [azninvazn] i don't know how i mistyped '#513' as '#
  mp3sforqueers', but i'm getting the fuck out of here
  *** Parts: azninvazn
  [mcgruff] ^5


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907313
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.696422
text:
  <D1> dude, I'm so puerto rican.
  <Guilty> I dont get it
  <BR4D> youre so elton john
  <Guilty> That I get


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907313
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.696467
text:
  (TheOne) I wanna help at #nohacks
  (@Matt) take the test, answer one question and you can get in
  (@Matt) echo the time in red
  (TheOne) .//echo -a $chr(3) $+ 4 $time
  (TheOne) omg, so hard, i had to look at the help files </sarc>
  (@Matt) its wrong
  (TheOne) i think you will find its right
  (@Matt) NO .. I R LEET SCRIPTER NOOB .. I WOULD KNOW
  (@Matt) -noob


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907314
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.696515
text:
  <@mike> i think what we all want to know, orion, is whether
  the ice cream truck hit the kid
  <@orion> unfortunately not
  <@orion> it was just some kids screaming after the missed
  creamy treat opportunity


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907314
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.696561
text:
  <Samah> hmm the one bad thing about seeing cute chicks - it
  gets me depressed.... T_T
  <@toe2toe> /j #suicide


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907314
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.696620
text:
  <Ashpool> I have offically reached full bachelorhood.  Use a
  plate...then chuck it out.
  <SirPNut> sif need plate.. eat it straight from the frypan
  <@Agg> plate?  pfft, amateur.  when you eat directly off the
  table, magazines, chairs, etc..
  <SirPNut> then throw the frypan out
  <@aftahours> cook everything in the one pot, drain the pot
  then eat outta the pot :) tastes better that way
  <@Agg> or with my cooking, pour the food out of the pot and
  eat the pot, it's more tasty


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907314
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.696679
text:
  <Thep> I want to clean up bio-waste
  <Sora> Um.
  <Sora> Hint: That involves other people's shit and piss.
  <Sora> And amputees wiggling their stumps at you and moaning.
  That always creeped me out.
  <Thep> I'd like to retract my last statement during the minute
  of 5:30 EST
  <Sora> Ah ha ha
  <Sora> Yeah.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907315
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.696758
text:
  <monami> hm, these girls sure are fat
  <QJ> where where?
  <monami> can you look at pictures of fat naked girls wherever
  you are?
  <QJ> yes
  <QJ> it's in my contract


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907315
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.696821
text:
  <teste_fly> wish me luck on my date tonihgt guys
  * aquacavi crosses fingers
  * dr_rotcod crosses his penises
  <teste_fly> :0
  <aquacavi> the secret is out ladies and gentlemen


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907315
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.696885
text:
  <QuoteSick> >:)
  <QuoteSick> {:-)
  <zantispam> :-{
  <zantispam> ^^^ moustache
  <zantispam> :-{>
  <zantispam> ^^^ goatee
  <acestus> {:-) ?
  <acestus> Toupee?
  <DigDug> >8)
  <finkployd> :(-<(&)    - not happy having a tapeworm


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907315
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.696934
text:
  <FFD> I was just wondering where anyone could get 99 virgins
  together in one place... Then I remembered IRC.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907316
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.696981
text:
  (SaMaNtHa^) as long as you're not attracted to chipmunks
  (MarK^MacLeaN) i'm not
  (MarK^MacLeaN) except for that whole chipmunk raping incident
  (MarK^MacLeaN) poor lil guy
  (MarK^MacLeaN) girl girl.. i mean girl lol
  (SaMaNtHa^) homosexuality and beastiality all rolled into one
  (MarK^MacLeaN) yeah it was a tough year


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907316
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.697029
text:
  JA: would you date a christian?
  JK: Sure
  JK: I'd screw the Jesus right out of her
  JA: OMG i can't BELIEVE you just said that
  JK: Because once you've been in bed with me, you know the
  truth
  JK: there is no God :(


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907316
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.697108
text:
  <jer|SYIOUX> i only care about sex when I'm horny, when I'm
  not, I be like "omg eww liek no way"
  <MiG-S0up> are you gay?
  <jer|SYIOUX> no
  <MiG-S0up> cuz if u are thats alright man
  <jer|SYIOUX> ...
  <MiG-S0up> i mean i always supsected something
  <jer|SYIOUX> I'm not gay
  <MiG-S0up> i support you 100%
  <jer|SYIOUX> stop hitting on me
  <MiG-S0up> i'll give u a ride to those gay support rallies
  <MiG-S0up> i mean if thats ur thing
  <MiG-S0up> cuz its ok
  <MiG-S0up> i support you 100%
  <jer|SYIOUX> i'm not gay but I do think keanu reeves is hot


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907317
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.697158
text:
  <darvawrk> and I have PROOF (god i love our logging) that
  we're connecting to the server and transmitting and they drop
  the connection.
  <Trey> EHLO darva.with.a.clue.com
  <WhatNot> you had me at EHLO


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907317
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.697202
text:
  <pR@y4m0jo> Man, i have to take a huge dump, I have such a
  backlog of shit I could be a bash moderator.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907317
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.697263
text:
  <Ben> I love the internet.
  <@Reb> ...
  <Ben> You can ask your girl friends about their problems
  <Ben> Play xbox for 20 minutes
  <Ben> Come back, say "Yeah you're right..."
  <Ben> Then go play some more xbox.
  <@Reb> ...You son of a bitch that was me!
  <Ben> REBECCA?
  *** Reb sets mode: +b Ben*!*@*.*
  *** Ben has been kicked by Reb (Asshole)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907318
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.697366
text:
  <codewolf> I need a new toy, I've played with this one enough
  <codewolf> maybe a Z4
  <Teatime> Or a miata.
  <Teatime> codewolf: A ferrari.
  <Teatime> Or an RUF Porsche
  <fluffy> Teatime: or he could just save a lot of money and get
  a sign that says "im insecure about the size of my penis."


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907318
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.697462
text:
  <|404notfound> They need to make keyboards without the caps
  lock button, and then give the buttons to martial arts
  masters.
  <|404notfound> "Only when you can snatch the caps lock from my
  hand may you yell incessantly like an idiot."


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907319
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.697510
text:
  <JDigital> Speaking of which, did you know that Slashdot.org
  just changed its name to Gullible?
  <HoJu> Really?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907319
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.697604
text:
  CianMTF: So... i was like on this site
  CianMTF: "unprecedented computer recovery techniques!"
  ShateredLifetime: "We use different hammers to find out which
  one makes it work"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907319
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.697720
text:
  <BronsonTheBeef> So we were supposed to have a guest speaker
  in one of my classes
  <BronsonTheBeef> to talk about diversity and racism and shit
  today
  <BronsonTheBeef> prof's never met him..
  <BronsonTheBeef> in walks this super black gangsta ghetto dude
  <BronsonTheBeef> he's got a 'pimp' chain around his neck,
  wearing FUBU everything
  <BronsonTheBeef> has a gold watch and a ring on each finger,
  smells like pot and beer
  <BronsonTheBeef> he even had a do-rag on and a cigarrette
  tucked behind his ear
  <BronsonTheBeef> walks in in true rapper style flashing his
  crazy ghetto signs at us
  <BronsonTheBeef> the prof's like...'are you... jeff?'
  <BronsonTheBeef> he goes 'true dat, ho' and says 'you all my
  niggaz!' and he turns in a circle
  <BronsonTheBeef> waving his arms in the air singing about
  'niggaz in 'da house' or some shit
  <BronsonTheBeef> so she tells him to give his speech on
  diversity and shit
  <BronsonTheBeef> and he starts talkin about 'the man' and how
  'white folk be dissin'
  <BronsonTheBeef> then like a minute later this other black
  dude runs in dressed in a suit
  <BronsonTheBeef> and says 'sorry I'm late'
  <BronsonTheBeef> it turns out the first black dude was just
  baked. he doesn't even go to college
  <BronsonTheBeef> he just wanted to buy weed in the dorms


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907320
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.697814
text:
  <GreenO> I made a stop-go lego-porn animation
  <GreenO> It was sweet... it was inside a castle.  It involved
  a horse too


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907320
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.697867
text:
  *** Now talking in #coffee
  <DigDug> COFFEEEEEEEE
  <DigDug> YAYAYAYYAYA
  <DigDug> CAFFEINE
  <DigDug> WOOT!!!!!!
  <DigDug> LELELELELELEEELELEE
  <DigDug> ^_^


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907321
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.697961
text:
  * PokeSmot pokes everyone to sleep
  <+JohnTaSays> ur nick somehow makes me keep thinkin of smoke
  pot
  <@Pyroman> ...


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907321
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.698010
text:
  <Jackryan2000guy> You know you've played too much soul caliber
  when you get the sudden urge in the middle of a calculus test
  to stand up, wave your fist and yell, "Souls! Come to me!"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907321
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.698056
text:
  hehehe8383: school was pretty fun for me cus of the teachers =
  P
  hehehe8383: like i remember this one time in like 5th grade or
  something
  hehehe8383: i got a bloody nose in my math class and i had on
  a white shirt to boot
  hehehe8383: so i went to the nurse for like 10 min. while i
  was sittin in the nurses office, the period was over so my
  class left and another class came in
  hehehe8383: but i still had my books there so i had to go back
  in
  hehehe8383: so i walk into the classroom with blood stains on
  my shirt and holding a blood spotted tissue up to my nose
  hehehe8383: so the teacher pointed at me and she goes "see
  what i do to kids who dont do their homework?"
  hehehe8383: i swear to you, this kid next to me had a
  MORTIFIED look on his face as he started scribbling stuff down
  on some incomplete worksheet =P


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907322
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.698102
text:
  <Auger> i stayed in a hospital when i was in second grade and
  i peed my bed cause i couldn't get up and i was too scared to
  call someone in


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907322
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.698153
text:
  <_Bas> how come cars only have 4/5 gears?
  <_Bas> if they make like overdrive on an overdrive
  <_Bas> would you get much much gas mileage?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907322
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.698208
text:
  <wasted> fuck
  <wasted> lol
  <wasted> apperantly transparancy can go 100%
  <wasted> invisible
  <wasted> i have a window somewhere. in my screen.
  <wasted> god knows where ;
  <sc0tt> LOL


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907323
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.698304
text:
  <cheapo> haha, this screen appeared on my windows that said
  "time before shutdown: 60 seconds"
  <cheapo> so i turned the windows clock 2 years backwards and
  now it says "time before shutdown: 729 days" :D:D
  <cheapo> i just love windows :D


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907323
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.698405
text:
  < Nooblender> on an unrelated note i had to wake up early
  after staying up late to have breakfast with my hot nieces, so
  i went to sleep at 8 pm but woke up at midnight, wtf
  < that_guy> on a related note do you realize how creepy 'hot
  nieces' sounds?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907323
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.698465
text:
  <Muzzle79> i'm so poor that we make the koolaid with water,
  then steal a bunch of sugar packets from restraunts so that we
  can add sugar to each glass...
  <Astanix> lol
  <Astanix> awesome
  * Muzzle79 is serious.. i've done it before..
  <Muzzle79> lol
  <Jerki1989> im so poor i cant even afford to go to the
  restraunt to steal sugar....
  <Muzzle79> by restraunts i mean
  <Muzzle79> arbys


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907324
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.698521
text:
  <andyd> No, I'm not being difficult
  <andyd> but it is ACTUALLY IMPOSSIBLE TO BUY LICENSES FOR
  SOFTWARE WHEN THE LICENSES HAVE BEEN WITHDRAWN FROM SALE,
  <gardron> lol
  <gardron> client?
  <andyd> I can't tell.  For a moment I thought that it was a
  brick wall.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907324
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.698571
text:
  (br0kerman) leave him alone
  (br0kerman) hes more l33t then u
  (br0kerman) he deserves +o
  (Skizer) no, he can fuck off
  (Skizer) he deserves +JEW
  (br0kerman) why?
  (Skizer) cause he's a faggot
  (Skizer) not even +JEW
  (br0kerman) hahah
  (Skizer) some jew's are cool
  (Skizer) he's gay
  (Skizer) he deserves +SANFRANCISCO cause he's a flaming faggot


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907325
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.698677
text:
  <@Hah|> A lot of you are way too attached to RO. If the
  servers go down permanently, I wonder how all of you guys
  would react.
  <Dekar> I'm not that attached.
  <Dekar> I mean sure, I love the game.. but if It went down, I
  would move on.
  <com4> hah: i'd kill everyone.. in this room .. if the game
  went down.. and then i'd eat some yogurt
  <com4> cuz you know yogurt tastes good. the fruit on the
  bottom stuff.. rocks.. and then i'd kill people


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907325
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.698733
text:
  <Doc> hmm.. IE crashed
  <Doc> but i suppose it was my fault... after all, i did press
  teh "Back" button
  <Doc> what was i thinking...
  <cactoid> you madman
  <Tippytoes> risktaker
  <Doc> i like to live on the edge


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907325
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.698783
text:
  <extrasupreme> This one time, i scored this chick at the
  pub...in the TOILETS !
  <dunnakin> no you didnt you lying fuckhead
  <extrasupreme> ok, i made it up
  <extrasupreme> damn.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907326
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.698881
text:
  <@puto|^_...> i went in the restroom to take a piss
  <@puto|^_...> then my fucking shorts snuck out of my reach
  <@puto|^_...> and fuckign snapped my penis up while pissing
  <@puto|^_...> fuckign pissed everywhere and on myself


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907326
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.698929
text:
  <Aslanna> a fucking goodnight you all you fuckers, don't let
  the shity fucknosed bedbugs rape your bitch ass!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907326
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.698983
text:
  <Mentar_Ex> Having a huge debate about the war on drugs.
  <Mentar Ex> What's your take on it?
  <@Galleta> You know, I'm really divided on that subject,
  because I love war, and I love drugs, and I just hate to see
  them go at eachother. It's like a chick fight, only with tons
  of blood and no flesh.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907327
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.699036
text:
  <AvatarADV> Condensed version: "How the hell did his KNIGHTS
  shoot down my strategic bombers?!"
  <ShadowLotus> LOL
  <meep_meep> lol. catapults


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907327
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.699137
text:
  <Twins> I watched a vesectomy reversal last night
  <Fullauto> eeeh
  <Fullauto> I hate nose surgery
  <Fullauto> it's soooo sick
  <Twins> D:
  <Twins> Vasectomy = genital surgery D:
  * Fullauto runs back to modelling


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907328
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.699235
text:
  <bhlaab> I want to learn sexual education via the internet! I
  know what to do! I'll search for "sex" in google! It will be
  an educational journey of science.
  <bhlaab> 202,000,000 entries found! I will learn a lot!!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907328
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.699358
text:
  <vqhmdragn> rawk!
  <S4murai> exactly
  <vqhmdragn> twat I cunt hear you I must have a ear infucktion,
  plz cum closer
  <S4murai> I too have an ear infucktion butits ok, I have a
  pill to take every half whore
  <vqhmdragn> I'm afriad I cunt afwhored such a pill :(
  S4murai> a little less expenisive is a small prick to your
  finger. Tit's the Doctwhore's bill that'll clit you in the
  end.
  <vqhmdragn> so twats up s4murai?
  <S4murai> nut much, you?
  <vqhmdragn> just chillin out
  <vqhmdragn> wait, it's midnut, I just turned 18, that's twats
  up
  <S4murai> really? that's ballsome!
  <vqhmdragn> yea now I can buy cigs legaly, I cuntent bewhore


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907329
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.699408
text:
  <xanex> xmms manages to skip about 90 songs in my playlist and
  keep playing the same 5 over and over
  <xanex> its a new feature, they call it 'MTV mode'


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907329
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.699545
text:
  *** ClayStudy is now known as Claymen
  <Dingbat> ClayStudy means Clay is dong study.... so does
  Claymen mean Clay is doing men? :P
  <Claymen> stfu Dingbat


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907330
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.699592
text:
  <Uriel> crackhead is driving at 60 MPH and talking to the
  seats. A stoner is driving at 6 MPH and munching on the seats
  <piman> How fast will they be going in 2 hours when they hit?
  <pvx> 0 mph. Dammed elephant crossings..


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907330
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.699636
text:
  <Kersus> we have to exchange presents at work. we had a $20
  limit. So naturally
  I bought 20 dollars worth of kool-aid


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907330
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.699686
text:
  <Ahriman> !google Killing children for the benefit of pig
  farmers
  <BuffyBot> GOOGLE : Canadian Coalition for Green Health Care (
  http://www.greenhealthcare.ca/workshop22-09-00.htm )


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907330
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.699732
text:
  <dr_cool> New Zealand is a shit hole full of sheep
  <marc> yeah, but they give better head than the kangaroos


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907331
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.699795
text:
  <Sphexi_LOTU> Volvo has a new concept car out, designed by
  women for women.
  <Sphexi_LOTU> It has verticle wing-type doors so women won't
  get their dresses torn when getting out, lots of luggage space
  for shopping bags, removable seat covers and carpeting so you
  can remodel the car at will, and extra large visor mirrors for
  applying makeup.
  <Sphexi_LOTU> it's going to be extra reliable and maintenance
  free, so women won't have to worry about remembering to get
  the oil changed or the engine tuned up.
  <CaesarMaximus> Volvo swedish quality =)
  <Tempest_MD> Does it come with a driver?
  <Tempest_MD> (women don't know how to drive)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907331
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.699841
text:
  <@NullC> LOL. so some 18yr chickie that I talk to just called
  aol support for
  some dumb ass problem.. and now the AOL support guy
  is IMing her and
  talking dirty to her and she's freaked out.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907331
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.699883
text:
  [@haro] 220-You are connected to our server, please note that
  [@haro] all hack attempts are reported to the FBI.
  [@haro] lol, right..
  [@haro] a israeli site, reporting to the fbi


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907332
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.699980
text:
  <fo0bar> it's sad how I can watch these simpsons dvds and pick
  out the scenes that were cut for syndication
  <ogw> yeah...so how's the Android's Dungeon doing for ya?
  <fo0bar> worst...  channel...  ever


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907332
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.700039
text:
  <@chupa> i get my cable on the 19th which is gay
  <@chupa> i don't know what i'm gonna do
  <@chupa> what to d/l first
  <@[TrIpLe]> movies
  <@[TrIpLe]> porn movies
  <@[TrIpLe]> full length porn movies


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907333
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.700149
text:
  <Mak> Aimee, well that's your opinion, and I have my opinion
  about you. I don't bring my opinion up, so I'd love it if in
  return you'd do the same, if only for common courtesy :)
  <Aimee> I'd love to hear your opinion about me hon.
  <Aimee> Perhaps you could write a book?
  <Aimee> and name it "Things Aimee doesn't care about, by
  Makat"
  <Mak> Chapter 1: Other people


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907333
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.700199
text:
  [4:02pm] <HandofErebus> i wish i could hit Edit>undo witha lot
  of things
  [4:02pm] <HandofErebus> like when i was in on my mom nekid
  [4:02pm] <HandofErebus> if only that damn edit>undo was right
  there


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907334
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.700300
text:
  <blaxthos> "yea, um, let me get 2 boxen of sudafed"
  <blaxthos> "sorry, by law you can only get 1 box at a time"
  <blaxthos> "okay, let me get 1 box of sudafed and these 7
  guns"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907334
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.700352
text:
  <ChapelPaige> Oh tell me why, do we build castles in the sky?
  <@Apoc> to make them harder to assault
  <ChapelPaige> ...good point.
  <@Apoc> Lets see you get a trebuchet up here bitch


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907334
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.700412
text:
  <Wookie> gunkaaa??
  <gunkbitch> gunkaaa is teh mastah haxor
  <Wookie> gunkaaa??
  <gunkbitch> gunkaaa: It's not rape if they can't say no.
  <Wookie> :o
  <gunkaaa> wtf
  <gunkaaa> where did that come from


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907334
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.700454
text:
  (@{basara}): i can live with aaygo being texan and i can live
  with mos and his love for the male genatalia but i draw the
  line at a DIET drink


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907335
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.700501
text:
  <Ninja_Cow> I view anal sex like eating cake with your anus.
  <Ninja_Cow> It doesn't serve a purpose and it looks
  disgusting.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907336
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.700549
text:
  <Guilty> Pen, you're going to hae to give something up
  <Guilty> You cant go to a gym and run geekissues.org


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907337
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.700643
text:
  <Ark> ops kick you from th eroom, opers kick you from the
  network.  I kick you in the nuts.
  <Ark> choose wisely


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907337
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.700700
text:
  <+Rainetine> where have all the protons gone
  <+Rainetine> LONG TIME PASSING
  <+Rainetine> where have all the protons gone
  <+Rainetine> LONG TIME AGO
  <+Rainetine> where have all the protons gone
  <+Rainetine> they've fused into neutrons, now we know


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907338
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.700881
text:
  <Hef> correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't holy water just water
  that has a prayer said over it?
  <Tribolthree> holy water is water blessed by a priest, nothing
  special or added -_- technically he could bless the water
  coming from a pipe
  <Tribolthree> so like you could have a fountain of holy water
  <Hef> the priest would probably get tired of the constant
  blessing
  <Hef> and run out of mana


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907338
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.700939
text:
  <1stStrike> is everything in britian closed on a saturday or
  something?
  <Jericho24.> at 6pm, yes
  <1stStrike> well it's only 1 pm
  <Jericho24.> as u just said urself... B R I T A I N
  <1stStrike> oh wait


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907339
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.701003
text:
  <Kuros> ya, but your in canada...
  <Error_404> it's colder... but we get to fuck 14 year olds
  <Error_404> so it evens out


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907339
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.701057
text:
  <SRG> Metallica sold out in 45 mins :/
  <NotOneOfUs> Yeah I know.
  <NotOneOfUs> Oh wait
  <NotOneOfUs> You mean, like, a concert?
  <SRG> yes


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907339
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.701122
text:
  <tate> it occurs to me
  <Beerman> myeas?
  <tate> and this is really probably not a good thought
  <Beerman> ooh
  <tate> but if a man were to buy those crazy "enhance your bust
  line" pills and sneak them into his girlfriend/wife's food,
  would they still work the same?
  <Fenris> Yes they do
  * Beerman ponders this
  <Beerman> sweet
  <tate> the next question, of course, is do those pills work at
  all?
  <Fenris> Yes
  * Fenris caresses his monster jugs
  <Fenris> NEVERMIND THAT


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907340
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.701213
text:
  <spineshank> come to my city, everyone who isn't white smells,
  and no that isnt a racist comment either


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907340
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.701301
text:
  <[TN]FBMachine> i got kicked out of barnes and noble once for
  moving all the bibles into the fiction section


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907341
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.701349
text:
  <miro> ramiro@calcifer:/etc$ ping www.thepiratebay.org
  <miro> PING www.thepiratebay.org (83.140.176.146) 56(84) bytes
  of data.
  <miro> 64 bytes from
  hey.mpaa.and.apb.bite.my.shiny.metal.ass.thepiratebay.org
  (83.140.176.146): icmp_seq=1 ttl=48 time=358 ms


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907341
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.701397
text:
  tohayer: My windows machine crashes scarily
  tohayer: Whatever audio is playing, slows down
  tohayer: Like when Dave is disconnecting Hal's memory
  tohayer: "Ted... Ted... why are you opening the task manager.
  You're scaring me, Ted"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907341
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.701448
text:
  <madslim> man i've drunk so much beer today
  <madslim> i feel like i've put on 500 pounds
  <cutwrk> ./nick madfat


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907342
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.701538
text:
  <Louth`> night: Saint's a gimp
  <Louth`> an ugly little gimp with moles
  <SaintiouS> AM FUCKEN NOT YOU.
  <SaintiouS> Duchebag.
  <NiGhTHiNG> SaintiouS: So, as a gimp, do you just hang there
  and get orally
  fucked or do you also take an active part in your
  humiliation?
  <SaintiouS> I am not a gimp!
  <SaintiouS> Louth` is.
  <SaintiouS> He just accuses me!
  <Louth`> not only a little gimp with moles, he isnt too
  clever, and he adores
  the ground humans walk on
  <Louth`> night: he'd quite seriously enjoy sucking your balls
  virgerously
  given the chance ;)
  <Louth`> I saw him get aroused by a cockroach once
  <NiGhTHiNG> Louth`: I resent that pun.
  <Louth`> night: pun? :)
  <SaintiouS> Screw you guys.. I'm going home!
  <NiGhTHiNG> SaintiouS: What about that ball lick?
  <SaintiouS> NiGhTHiNG, SHUTUP!
  <NiGhTHiNG> SaintiouS: Is that a yes?
  <SaintiouS> NO!@#$
  <SaintiouS> Bah.. I'm going to IRCnet.
  <SaintiouS> Where I have some respect.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907342
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.701591
text:
  <TheMaker> I finally made aop on dalnet!
  <G13> was this yer entire life's struggle?
  <TheMaker> yes
  <TheMaker> since 1996
  <G13> you are a sad, sad man


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907342
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.701689
text:
  <Jeeeeebus> eg: I was in a doorway with my arm across it
  resting .. and he walks thru and goes "minimize, please"
  without even thinking bout it..
  <RnRcneHHlt> hahahahahahahahahahaha
  <Jeeeeebus> I wish I could do that..


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907343
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.701738
text:
  <Ghoulem> I think Grand Theft Auto 3 gives a wrong impression
  of how the world really is.
  <Eclipse> Because of all the violence?
  <Ghoulem> No, Because of all the black people driving
  Ferraris.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907343
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.701789
text:
  <Vanion> where is everybody from in here?
  <NemoMac> Indiana
  <Vanion> am I the only american?
  <NemoMac> Last time I checked, Indiana was in the USA..
  <Vanion> wtf?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907343
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.701871
text:
  <Ibrahim> mike should work for tech support
  <Ibrahim> not any company in particular, just tech support in
  genreal
  <michael> Ibrahim, That seems like a good idea in theory. But
  take into account my acute lack of patience.
  <Ibrahim> that's the point.
  <Ibrahim> we record all calls, video tape you, and sell it as
  comedy things.
  <michael> Mmmm...no.
  <Ibrahim> you'd make plenty of money.
  <michael> Mmmm...no.
  <Ibrahim> Free Donuts.
  <michael> Mmmm...no.
  <Ibrahim> how about your choice of 20 nude women at your beck
  and call carrying large tropical drinks.
  <Ibrahim> actually, we could make more money with said 20
  women and the video.
  <michael> How about we combine all of them?
  <Ibrahim> a comedy about 20 nude women with donuts and large
  tropical drinks?
  <LdySaphyre> I want the video of Ib trying to talk twenty
  women into being michael's nude servants.
  <michael> Ibrahim, No. A comedy about 20 nude women seducing
  me and offering me large tropical drinks while I try to
  perform my duties as a tech support person :P
  <Ibrahim> now THERE is a video!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907343
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.701935
text:
  <SomeGuy> God: "Hello Osama?"
  <SomeGuy> Osama: "Yes God"
  <SomeGuy> God: "Osama.. did you hear about the tsunami?"
  <SomeGuy> Oasama: "Yes"
  <SomeGuy> God "Beat that you prick.."


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907344
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.701988
text:
  * mike rolls eyes WITH SEXY RESULTS
  <RushMore> you got porn behind eyeballs?
  <mike> yes
  <RushMore> lucky cunt
  <RushMore> mine is on the bottom of my foot
  <RushMore> which is relly ackward for masturbation


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907344
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.702042
text:
  <UN-REAL> ihel leyha id use http mirc hahaha
  <UN-REAL> like idd iwhe ni worked at the ama
  <@EzyRider> we need an interpreter in here for UN-REAL..
  <@EzyRider> fucked if i can follow half of what he says
  <@[[x]]> LOL
  <@Bloody_D_Death> LOL


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907344
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.702085
text:
  Frost: :p
  Frost: lol dood
  Frost: my brother and his friend come home just now
  Frost: and theres 5 kids coming up the street running
  Frost: im like wtf
  ape: lol
  Frost: and he tells me they are chasing him and his friend
  Frost: so i go out there like wtf fags what do you want
  Frost: and they said my little brother and his friend hit some
  lady in the head with a rock and shes bleeding
  ape: ROFL
  Frost: man my brother is dumb
  Frost: im gonna let them beat him up
  ape: thats the funniest shit ive heard in a long time
  Frost: :P


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907345
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.702129
text:
  <DMC[tiky]> the word rocks is funny to me, cause when i was a
  little kid in fox chapel, my friends brother told him GO SUCK
  ON A ROCK, so he did, and everyone crowded around him and
  watched him suck on this rock for like 10 minutes.............


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907345
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.702182
text:
  * DuneBoy wonders why his code won't compile
  <DuneBoy> missing ) my ass
  <ZorbaTHut> "Ironically, however, his ass was indeed missing
  its right cheek."


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907345
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.702238
text:
  | Lavalamp is (~lava@www.childrenpalace.edu.vn])
  <@madog> vietnam sucks anyway
  <Lavalamp> vn = vietnam?
  <Lavalamp> maybe that's why it's so lagged
  <@madog> *sigh*
  <@Guilty> I figured Vietnam would have a wonderful network of
  fiber since all the holes were already dug


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907345
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.702292
text:
  <Kae> dangit, I'm missing two bytes
  <Epesh> Kae: make them up!
  * l_oke hands kae a unicode character
  <Epesh> there's only 65000 combinations
  * Kae pads with 0's


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907346
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.702347
text:
  <CrazyClimber> top dangling modifier of the day:
  <CrazyClimber> "A jet going 100 m.p.h. slammed into a deer,
  which ruptured a wing fuel tank and dumped 70 gallons of gas
  on the runway. "
  <CrazyClimber> i knew about cows and methane, but...
  <me_tew> Dammit, when are they going to REQUIRE that fuel
  tanks on deer be moved away from the wings.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907346
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.702395
text:
  <Dryzzid{Nap}> So I wonder...do people in France, England,
  etc. measure their penises in the metric system?
  <perianwyr> LET'S LOOK UP SOME UK GAY PORN AND FIND OUT


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907346
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.702454
text:
  <Georgo> bah, you stupid people and your big paragraphs, I
  always get the gist of things by reading the first and last
  sentences
  <Piggah> Well Georgo, there was this one time me and your mom
  went out to the store. However, it ended up with my getting
  these sudden, primal urges. One thing led to another and
  needless to say I was fucking her doggy-style and that's when
  I yelled "Who's the Boss?," stuck my cock in her ass, and then
  screamed "TONY DANZA!" But in the end we only landed up buying
  a few vegetables and some milk.
  <Georgo> god I love happy storys


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907347
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.702520
text:
  <ke1th> i go into the bank..
  <ke1th> and the teller says
  <ke1th> please sign here
  <ke1th> so, i get the pen
  <ke1th> and sign
  <ke1th> ke1th kennedy
  <ke1th> and hand it back to her
  <ke1th> as she looks as me strangely.
  <ke1th> and i'm wondering wtf did i do now.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907347
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.702585
text:
  <Artifice> Most people using that logic probably would phrase
  it differently. "Digits" is a fancy word
  <_kw> yeah, use 'numbers' instead
  * MachinShi (~vat@cpe-76-95-36-105.socal.res.rr.com) Quit
  (Quit: Leaving)
  <NoGods> Yup.
  <JFalcon> really? "She used her digits to arouse herself" vs.
  "She used numbers to arouse herself".  One changes a simple
  pleasing into an orgy.
  <_kw> you have a sick mind
  <Artifice> Really? I was thinking math inclined librarian in
  the second one
  <_kw> GOOD MAN


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907347
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.702631
text:
  <Soulcleaver> Once me, my dad, and some of his employees were
  having a racist joke contest, but midway through we remembered
  we were still in Wendy's.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907347
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.702683
text:
  <navs> i give up
  <wolf> navs: isn't that the translation of the french national
  anthem?
  <navs> hahaha
  <boobie> hahaha


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907348
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.702737
text:
  <Kaff> the biker from the Village People died.
  <Kaff> he died of lung cancer.
  <Kaff> which just proves that getting a coq up the date will
  kill you in mysterious ways.
  <Dane> kaff: no. you just misunderstood when the report said
  that he'd had too many fags.
  <Kaff> haha


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907348
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.702781
text:
  zippo4x4: ok then i just wasted 10 min
  Asbestos: yeah you did
  zippo4x4: i know im a dumbass
  Asbestos: it happens
  Asbestos: if jesus was real he'd love you


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907348
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.702829
text:
  <Gentletouch> Adonai...one day you'lllearn...there are Much
  better things in life to lick then carpet ;D
  <Adonai> yeah, like studying a grammar book


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907349
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.702879
text:
  <barka> one more time, anybody around here use StrokeIt?
  <e> no, I prefer KY Jelly
  <barka> Y2KY Jelly.
  <barka> To cram 4 digits where only 2 used to fit.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907349
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.702930
text:
  *** bad-_-girl has joined #devil
  <[DeViL]Man> hi bad girl
  <[DeViL]Man> just how bad are you?
  <bad-_-girl> vey bad
  <bad-_-girl> very bad
  <[DeViL]Man> bad at spelling? or something else?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907349
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.703585
text:
  <evilkalla> oh man
  <evilkalla> that club sandwich has caused some intestinal
  armaggeddon
  <ModernAngel> four horsemeats of the anal apocalypse
  <crux> well, there goes my boner


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907349
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.703647
text:
  <DrBacchus> fajita: RFC 2795
  <fajita> DrBacchus: excuse me?
  <DrBacchus> fajita: You're supposed to give me a link.
  <fajita> DrBacchus: i'm not following you...
  <DrBacchus> dumb bot
  <fajita> Stupid human


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907350
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.703796
text:
  <Katalyst> how the hell do they make rice krispies snap
  crackle and pop
  <SumDumGoy> Magic, Kat.
  <Promethius> Kat: They over-dry the rice after it's puffed, so
  when milk touches it, it converts to a less-dense form and the
  act of subfusion makes it pop
  <Katalyst> [Promethius]: the 'magic' idea seems less
  complicated :o


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907350
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.703850
text:
  <idiot> My penis is like a pringles can :D
  <DrunkenMaster> the short stack ones
  <Bizznatch> LMAO
  <Bizznatch> 0WN3D
  <xanax`> hehe
  <idiot> bah


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907351
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.703953
text:
  <sulli> So I placed my order for the computer today
  <sulli> Any idea what "backorder" means?
  <dy> That means they dont have it, but will ship it to you
  once they get it.
  <sulli> FUCK that means all Im getting is 2 fans, a heatsink,
  and my free shirt and ballcap.
  <Omnica> Well, that will allow you to Look cool, and Be Cool
  :)
  <sulli> Fuck you


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907351
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.704025
text:
  <Ifrit> Hey H-fan?
  <H-fan2002> hmmm?
  <Ifrit> Have you heard it?
  <H-fan2002> what?
  <Ifrit> Have you heard it?
  <H-fan2002> heard what?
  <Ifrit> Have you heard the jokes they don't tell fags?
  *** Cybil has joined #digiartistsdomain
  <H-fan2002> no
  <Ifrit> ......
  * Ifrit stifles laughter
  <H-fan2002> fuck of ifrit
  <Ifrit> :D


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907352
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.704096
text:
  <Drestar> Are the fam guy dvd rips in svcd only?
  <OldSkoolS> Drestar: of course
  <OldSkoolS> pointless to release dvd rips in vcd
  <OldSkoolS> and don't get started on divx
  <OldSkoolS> friends don't let friends do divx
  <OldSkoolS> divx is a gateway format
  <OldSkoolS> you'll download divx, won't think it's so bad,
  next thing you know, you'll be downloading asf
  <OldSkoolS> then real media


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907352
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.704192
text:
  <James> I had an idea the other day.. Set up a website for all
  the people around the world who work in any form of customer
  reaching job. Everyone pays a membership fee each month, and
  this money goes into a pot. Then when a tech support person
  has a customer who really doesn't get it, they can use the
  money in the pot to hire a hitman.. It all goes around, so
  people will never have to deal with completely retarded
  customers again.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907353
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.704304
text:
  <WeZ> goodie 1 more hour then home time for me
  <WeZ> hehe
  <WeZ> not coming back this afternoon
  <Guyt_X> lucky
  <Guyt_X> why
  <Guyt_X> do u need to eat ?
  * Guyt_X runs
  <WeZ> going to the doctor to have a mole removed
  <Guyt_X> why dont u just wash
  <Guyt_X> sorry im nasty
  <Guyt_X> that was un called for
  <WeZ> sies
  * Guyt_X goes to wash his mouth out with soap
  * Guyt_X hands WeZ the soap
  <Guyt_X> u might need this


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907353
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.704348
text:
  *** Radz has quit IRC (Quit: Pure | Bitches | No, Fuck You)
  * KeeperS tries to make sense of Radz's quit message


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907353
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.704400
text:
  <@Quasi> I feel like my life is a movie.
  <@Quasi> But it's being shown on TV.
  <@Quasi> So all the sex scenes are cut.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907354
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.704450
text:
  <@dekkon> ive got an appointment at the eye doctor on the 13th
  <@dekkon> finally going to get contacts
  <@terminal_> contacts are a pain in the ass
  <+jmx> terminal they go in your eyes


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907354
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.704500
text:
  Buffman0250: i went to sam's club intending to buy contact
  lenses
  Buffman0250: i left with peanuts cookies and slim jims
  scr0t4r: is it because you couldn't tell the difference
  Buffman0250: well i didn't have any contacts
  scr0t4r: hmm i see
  Buffman0250: youd be surprised how similar they look
  scr0t4r: have you ever had a slim jim in your eye?
  Buffman0250: twice
  scr0t4r: you strike me as that type of person
  Buffman0250: the second time it wasn't an accident


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907354
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.704611
text:
  <@Casper> Girl from work and I went to the pool hall
  <@Casper> I asked her if she wanted to start talking
  <@Casper> She said we would talk about it tomorrow
  <@Casper> She has a nice looking sister too
  <@cypher> start talking about what?
  <@Casper> going out
  <@cypher> people _plan_ relationship status?
  <Vehementi> not only do they plan relationship status, they
  plan *talking* about relationship status.
  <Vehementi> later in the relationship this is more commonly
  known as the "Let's talk about our relationship" trap
  <@cypher> Vehementi: <3
  <sh> $relationship->discuss();
  <sh> new Relationship;


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907355
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.704658
text:
  <DooMGoaT> OMG
  <DooMGoaT> SQUASH THE SPIDER AND WIN AN XBOX 360!
  <DooMGoaT> shame none of the 360 games are as good as the
  spider squashy banner


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907355
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.704780
text:
  <NeonMorning> I'm scared I'm going to say something random and
  sound really stupid.
  <Urban_Hermit> be like me - always say something stupid and it
  never appears random


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907356
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.704858
text:
  Aegis> bah
  <Aegis> I'm out of pop
  <Aegis> and I don't have enough sugar to make koolaid
  <Aegis> sec, I'm gonna go melt some freezies into a glass
  <Mazrim> store run?
  <ameh> lol
  <Aegis> Maz: Not while male ingeunity can still prevail


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907356
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.704910
text:
  <Trimangle> ahg, my gf tried to kiss me after giving me head,
  I just pretended to be overcome with a sudden coughing fit and
  asked for a glass of water, then I took a sip, and gave the
  rest to her.
  <Trimangle> it was subtle
  <MikeyPain> heh
  <MikeyPain> I woulda handed her some mouthwash and a
  toothbrush
  <Trimangle> I was thinking of just hitting her on the nose
  with a rolled up newspaper


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907356
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.704964
text:
  <D1> snow, our final is to write a "funny" linux story and put
  in linux concepts.
  <Amanda`> "Little Kernel's First Upgrade"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907356
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.705012
text:
  <meenk> I hate when I am walking through the produce section
  at the store and they stop me and say "why are you stealing
  our canteloupe?"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907357
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.705068
text:
  <rob> they charged $75/h and it took "7" hours to do it
  <itr> where can i sign up for that 'repair' job
  <itr> i'll repair fuckin old ladies vaginas for $75/hour


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907357
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.705118
text:
  <Vang> No matter how dead one is, it's still demoralizing to
  see one's crotch get hurled explosively across a warehouse.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907357
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.705169
text:
  --- Topic for #celebs-n-models is <@YoGuRT_> beer just had his
  first Duck Job..how ya feel? <@Beercaps> same as before
  <Digested> heh
  <Digested> wtf is a duckjob?
  <Beercaps> its bj from julia roberts


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907358
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.705220
text:
  @(camo) erawtic: any chance of getting pussy?
  @(camo) lol
  @(camo) just tell her: "i got a better play to see... a puppet
  play... now unzip my pants and say hello to mr. helmethead"
  úúú Topic: rew sets topic [ten bucks says camo has no game. oh
  wait, whos dumb enough to bet against that.]
  @(diffuse) camo: that wasnt even funny.
  @(diffuse) at all.
  @(rew) hence my topic.
  @(erawtic) camo jesus
  @(rew) if i had said that in front of real people i would have
  gone 'im really sorry im going to leave now, dont worry about
  calling me'
  @(diffuse) yeah no shit.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907358
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.705270
text:
  <+The_Steel> I scored a 96% on the procrastination test
  <+The_Steel> I'm not suprised
  <+emul8or_> i put off the procrastination test till tomorrow


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907358
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.705324
text:
  <|argh|> I was caring for a woman from Kentucky and asked, "So
  how's your breakfast this morning?" "It's very good, except
  for the Kentucky Jelly. I can't seem to get used to the
  taste," the patient replied. I then asked to see the jelly and
  the woman produced a foil packet labeled KY Jelly.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907358
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.705372
text:
  [@Killer2{SoB}] WTF
  [@Killer2{SoB}] Stupid CNN
  [@Killer2{SoB}] "PHILADELPHIA, PA Researchers at the
  University of Temple announced yesterday that they had finally
  discovered a cure for nicotine addicts: smoking cigarettes."
  [@Killer2{SoB}] "The only way to effectively fight the
  cravings associated with the highly-addictive drug, nicotine,
  is to give your body its supply of desired nicotine, via
  smoking another cigarette. Smoking allows the nicotine found
  in cigarettes to travel to your brain in just seven seconds,
  effectively satisfying the craving.""


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907359
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.705419
text:
  <psychicbug> ok, take the bible in a .txt document and open it
  in notepad. shift every first letter to the right 1, and save
  it as an .avi. turns out, its a cumshot vid


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907359
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.705466
text:
  (@Shockwave) Windows 3.11 calculator is broken in an amusing
  way.
  (@Shockwave) Put in 3.01 - 3 and it gives you 0, every time.
  (@Shockwave) Hurray for flaws in MS's basic math table
  (JIM_BOB7813) Well if you need a calculator to do that, you
  deserve that answer :P


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907359
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.705516
text:
  <ShaneBe> i think i just realized what i have been doing wrong
  with my life.
  <ShaneBe> i make goals... but the goals are things like:
  <ShaneBe> "I am going to eat this 10-pack of tacos if it kills
  me."


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907360
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.705559
text:
  TsK/Scel: i think im gonna download some porn
  TsK/Scel: something ive never seen before tho
  TsK/Scel: something...... different
  Shane/Mehul: lol
  Shane/Mehul: porn with women?
  TsK/Scel: fuck you


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907360
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.705613
text:
  <jeff> if the butterfly effect isn't the best worst movie
  ever, i don't know what is
  <Calisa> Rotten Tomatoes has one review listed and it says,
  "Hitchcock would be proud."
  <jeff> proud to know he had nothing to do with that film


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907361
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.705663
text:
  <Knighted_> goddammit
  <Knighted_> why can't anything i think of turn out right?
  <Knighted_> listerine + foot odour smells worse than just
  feet, and now my shoes are technically flammable


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907362
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.705704
text:
  Captain: well that is half true, the environment is a problem,
  and recycling does help but so does killing fascists yeah
  Captain: so i say why stop at one
  Captain: do both
  panckreous: but killing fascists gets you arrested for....
  whats the charge called
  panckreous: oh ya
  panckreous: assassinating the president


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907362
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.705836
text:
  <Panzer> hmm. 3% out of about 2000 Battlefield gamers are
  female
  <Sargasm> That's...what, 60?
  <Panzer> dont know if thats exact
  <Wilbur> it is
  <dsbnh> and this matters because....?
  <dsbnh> now more gamers can get dates?
  <Wilbur> trivia is vital
  <Panzer> dee
  <Sargasm> 3% of them can, now
  <dsbnh> "omg kekekek i am a girl don't shoot k cutie ^___^"
  <Sargasm> "omg are u really a gurl?"
  <Sargasm> "pics plz"
  <dsbnh> "OMG yes"
  <Panzer> heh
  <dsbnh> "later after i win"
  <Panzer> forget it
  <dsbnh> "let me win k?"
  <Sargasm> "anything for u hunny
  <Sargasm> "
  <dsbnh> "^__^"
  <Panzer> ack von stupidhead
  *** Signoff: Garnet (Exit: Austnet Chat Network)
  <dsbnh> "what button do i press to shoot,
  becauseobviouslyicanconvinceiamagirlbyactingclueless"
  <Sargasm> "u can push my buttons any day"
  <dsbnh> "omg kkeekke ur funny"
  <dsbnh> "dude i have him we are  so win to win"
  <dsbnh> "oh crap, i typed that in wrong"
  <dsbnh> "kekeke hi... helllo"
  <Sargasm> Sadly, this is far more accurate than it should be
  <dsbnh> LOL


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907362
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.705891
text:
  <Guyver3> ive found, that dreaming that you get shot in the
  chest, twice, by an assassin that looks like Odo, in the back
  of car, and
  feeling your heart slow down to almost nothing, leaves a
  really acidic taste in your mouth when you wake up
  <a_0001> then don't dream that
  <Guyver3> i didnt say that i disliked the acidic taste


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907362
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.705932
text:
  NeoNess19: new reports say that being with friends boost your
  immune system
  LippyTaK: unless youre sharing needles


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907363
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.705982
text:
  <exo> why are redneck murders so hard to solve
  <exo> cuz theres no dental records and all their DNA is the
  same
  <fearz> HAHAHA


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907363
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.706030
text:
  <minkus> ohh my god these pies taste great
  <minkus> if only i could fuck them
  <minkus> WAIT! I CAN


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907363
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.706082
text:
  <arioch> Mario 69: Toadstool Gets Reamed
  <fraggle> i'd love to give the princess a good bonin'
  <aur__> sorry fraggle, but the princess is in another castle


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907364
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.706176
text:
  <Lemmih> a_shadow: You could start rollerskating. That was how
  I meet my first girlfriend.
  <Sonarman> or you could just masturbate to porn


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907364
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.706222
text:
  [@flu1d`]: i wanna fuck a deaf girl
  [@tomato]: thats kinda sick
  [@flu1d`]: so i can hear her go "woaoaaaaaarrrrrr"
  [@pitchblende]: hah
  [@flu1d`]: like a wookie
  [@tomato]: lol wtf


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907364
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.706277
text:
  <Hotwire> Crap. i hate having the flu.
  <Bananarama> y?
  <Hotwire> i sneezed, banged my head on the table, knocked my
  coffee over onto my keyboard then as i picked the cup and what
  coffee was left in it, i sneezed again, and dropped the mug
  right onto my nuts.
  <Hotwire> 'WARNING! Illness can cause sterility'


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907365
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.706321
text:
  (Argent-) okay- I have like 20 windows open and my disk is
  swapping like a hot couple during the 60's


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907365
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.706373
text:
  <RAD_ED> ...
  <RAD_ED> their making a REAL obama coin
  <RAD_ED> it looks retarded
  <Shark500> is it made of chocolate?
  <RAD_ED> lol


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907365
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.706419
text:
  TaXxXi: Umm...someone in our apartment complex wrote "U Suck
  Dick" in gold spraypaint on someone's brand new PT Cruiser.
  weird_aunt_martha: yeah PT cruisers are THAT ugly
  TaXxXi: I feel bad because I kinda laughed.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907366
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.706466
text:
  (@David_Mitchell) Have a good day, Mist
  (@_Mist_|School) you and your oxymorons
  (@David_Mitchell) "good" and "day"?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907366
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.706522
text:
  <McMooo> the hell.
  <McMooo> my sister invited some friend over to use my computer
  <McMooo> and failed to tell me
  <McMooo> so i get back from physics and there's a strange girl
  in my room.
  <McMooo> a girl in my room is strange enough as it is


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907366
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.706592
text:
  <toe2toe> what would happen is you were MEANT to type
  "prosecution is pressing for maximum sentencing on the count
  of vehicular manslaughter"....but ACTUALLY typed "the judge
  licks penis"
  <Jade_Vixen> If i was a legal secretay, this might all be a
  problem...
  <toe2toe> thats a pretty big if
  <toe2toe> perhaps you and your IF would like to come back to
  my place one day
  <toe2toe> and i can show you my big "perhaps"
  <Jade_Vixen> I can't spell for crap tonight... :P
  * Jade_Vixen rolls her eyes
  <Spizzer> ROFL toe2toe ur such a clown
  <toe2toe> im crying on the inside.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907367
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.706685
text:
  <Tw1zt1d> I need to do some DDR practice >;\
  <Minion> WTF? I always thought DDR was Double Date Rape


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907367
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.706742
text:
  <ace> type //run c:\con\con
  *** voonilla (gsfgdg@202.76.41.19503) Quit (Read error to
  voonilla: Connection reset by peer)
  *** voonilla (gsfgdg@202.76.41.10540) has joined #3GIMPS
  <voonilla> fark yew
  <voonilla> i had to like pull my computer out of the wall
  <voonilla> coz this fatal action thing wouldnt go away
  <voonilla> and my computer wont turn off if u push  the button
  <voonilla> coz if u shut it down it turns off by itself and
  shit
  <voonilla> and so I HAD TO PULL IT OUT OF THE FUCKING WALL
  <voonilla> AND ITS ALL UR FUCKING FAULT


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907367
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.706794
text:
  <sh`> hmmm i wonder if i can burn at 52x now
  <sh`> time to add to my pile of hardware sitting in/on the
  case
  <sh`> brb
  * sh` has quit IRC
  <xyonz> he needs a girlfriend or something


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907368
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.706984
text:
  <+Ava|anch3> i was just banned from a hacker channel
  <+Ava|anch3> i told him in german that i am his god
  <+Ava|anch3> and he understood it
  <+Ava|anch3> then i told him i loved him
  <+Ava|anch3> and he loves me
  [+cerb] hehehe
  <+Ava|anch3> now hes packeting me :/


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907369
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.707030
text:
  <blazemore> one time i was camping with a bunch of friends and
  me and this girl were sleeping next to each other and we were
  both laying on our sides with our asses touching and i
  accidentally farted


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907369
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.707133
text:
  <fraggle> get in trouble?
  <Afterglow> fraggle: getting in trouble because you look like
  elton john, of course
  <fraggle> yeah they're always disappointed when they find i
  cant play candle in the wind
  <fraggle> "so.. we measure the voltage across.... wait is that
  elton john back there? can you play us a song?"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907369
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.707186
text:
  <_ry0suke_> Select [128kbps 44100Hz 02:32min] Mary-kate &
  Ashley Olsen & Fri - Hugged by you
  <_ry0suke_> THIS SONG REMINDS ME OF YOU GODEDRP
  <godedrp> :)
  <_ry0suke_> Select [128kbps 44100Hz 01:02min] Anal Cunt - Your
  kid commited suicide because you suck
  <_ry0suke_> SO DOES THIS ONE STRANGELY


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907370
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.707236
text:
  <aO-> ugh
  <aO-> almost had a brown out
  <aO-> and im gone
  * Quits: aO- (~aO@ip68-14-10-213.ri.ri.cox.net) (Client Quit)
  <ecoli> sounds like someone had Taco Bell for lunch


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907370
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.707282
text:
  <BluePhoenix> I predict that in 500 years, everyone will be
  the same color.
  <@Measure> well after we rocket all the blacks into the sun,
  sure


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907370
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.707328
text:
  <Mouldy_Llama> ok, I will come clean
  <Mouldy_Llama> I only said I got with the chicken to look cool


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907371
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.707373
text:
  <k-rad-bob> i made an avi of me jacking off
  <k-rad-bob> then i jacked off while watching it
  * linKnee is afk: PUKING


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907371
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.707467
text:
  <SO|Razor> treize do you believe in other intelligent life?
  <SO|Treize> in the universe?
  <SO|Treize> or on forums?
  <SO|Razor> .............


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907371
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.707511
text:
  [ Skip ] my mum told me she deleted "that program that you
  have obscene conversations on"
  [ Skip ] i came on and irc was still here
  [ Skip ] yet my winamp is gone :S


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907372
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.707576
text:
  <blaxthos> so tonight i got roped into going to some
  evangelical church christmas dinner theatre
  <blaxthos> "oh christmas, carol!"
  <cue> evangelicals are morons
  <blaxthos> it was absolutely godawful
  <blaxthos> until the last musical number, where the main
  character realized she has a hole in her heart
  <blaxthos> and sang a song entitled "i'm going to fill my hole
  with jesus"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907372
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.707635
text:
  <+GoodScrat> wyatt: how's bounce?
  <+Wyatt> GoodScrat: decent
  <+Wyatt> makin a little money off of it
  <+GoodScrat> how much have you made off of it total to date?
  <+Wyatt> hmm... maybe 4K
  <+GoodScrat> over how many years?
  <+Wyatt> 1
  <+GoodScrat> 4k a year, thats not bad profit, when does your
  company go public?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907372
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.707681
text:
  <@[ben]> youd be suprised how many pancakes that mouth has
  masticated
  <@[ben]> and yes, i spelt the last word right


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907373
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.707722
text:
  Jefferson: FOR SOME REASON MY PASSWORD ON HOTMAIL WON WORK
  Mymuffinfatty: do you have caps lock on?
  Jefferson: oh
  Jefferson: nevermind.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907373
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.707772
text:
  Hooka: I'm going to pee on you
  Ralphy_Fox: that'd be hot
  lemonlimeskull: Only for a while, then it'd cool off.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907373
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.707813
text:
  (@Dreki) I just realized something.
  (@Dreki) A is the 1st letter of the alphabet and H is the 8th
  letter, right?
  (@Dreki) 9/11=0.8181818181=HAHAHAHA.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907374
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.707991
text:
  <friedegg>          _.---._    /\
  <friedegg>       ./'       "--`//
  <friedegg>     ./              o
  <friedegg>   ././  )______   __
  <friedegg> ./   / /     | |   7
  <friedegg>       "     "    "  "
  <friedegg>          _.---._    /\
  <friedegg>       ./'       "--`//
  <friedegg>     ./              o
  <friedegg>   ././  )______   __
  <friedegg> ./   / /     | |   7
  <friedegg>       "     "    "  "
  <b|ubeard> eek
  <friedegg> shhh
  <friedegg> i'm observing wildlife


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907374
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.708044
text:
  <gatewatcher> heh, last year, when my parrents made me goto
  ccd, i had to sit through a pro-life presentation. after, the
  guy asked my friend if he was pro-life. my friend goes yes, of
  course i am, i'm catholic. the guy goes, that's good. then my
  friend goes, yeah, i mean you can't eat babies unless they're
  born... the guy was clearly horrified.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907375
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.708098
text:
  <Jamon> he said, "my girlfriend fucks like a rabid hamster."
  <Jamon> other guy said, "wow, that's great.....mine fucks like
  a walrus."


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907375
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.708193
text:
  Geo: You know, I would be a straight A college student if it
  weren't the the internet.
  Chronologist: for the internet, you mean.
  Geo: ..
  Geo: SEE?!
  Geo: IT'S EVEN TAKING MY ABILITY TO CONVERSATE PROPERLY!!!!
  Geo: ...
  Geo: AWAY
  Hidoshi: ...Converse.
  Hidoshi: Conversate isn't a word.
  Geo: ...
  Geo: Fuck.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907375
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.708258
text:
  <ryano> i ain't drank dick for shit in months
  <reston> try a lemondrop bodyshot
  <reston> get some fly bitch and rub sugar on her tummy... lick
  it, take a shot of vodka
  <reston> and then eat a lemon
  <jonathans> is that some kind of homosexual alternative to
  tequila shots
  <reston> yea jon
  <reston> but its good
  <jonathans> sugar instead of salt
  <jonathans> lemon instead of lime
  <jonathans> a chick instead of your hand
  <jonathans> its beginning to make sense to me.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907375
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.708311
text:
  <krazy> Have any of you weighed yourselves before and after
  you shit?
  <Wanderer> ... Why would we want to know how much our shit
  weighed?
  <krazy> Well, it's helped me prove that, despite everyone's
  claims, I'm not full of shit.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907376
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.708365
text:
  <aptget>  I have $50 on Duke Nukem Forever finishing before
  Vista.
  <carpespasm>  can anyone quote from the bible which comes
  first, horsemen, ps3, DNF, or vista; I always forget
  <soogy>  Mark 13:4 "Tell us, when shall these things be? and
  what [shall be] the sign when all these things shall be
  fulfilled?"
  <soogy>  Even the Bible can't save us now.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907376
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.708419
text:
  <Electroly> kurros has a l33t ass projector, I saw a picture
  of it just once
  and I've been drooling ever since
  <T-ball> nice...
  <T-ball> I don't have room for a projector... :/
  <Brazilian> I have a monkey who draws on my wall really fast


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907377
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.708518
text:
  Wan Xion: last night I created an array search that is O(log
  base 4 n) I wonder if it's been done before
  KarpenkoSoup: Probably.
  Wan Xion: yeah
  Wan Xion: it's s simple concept
  Wan Xion: you just use 3 pivots
  KarpenkoSoup: There are people who fuck chickens. I'm pretty
  sure someone's written a search with O(log base 4 n) runtime.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907377
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.708568
text:
  [02:18:04] s7ank: i want to be one of those guys that types
  "s/j&jd//.^$ueu*///djsls/sm."
  and it's a perl script that turns dog crap into gold.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907377
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.708659
text:
  justsara: so, i started a new job today
  justsara: one of my co-workers, feels like i've known him for
  years
  a2so4: Where are you working now?
  justsara: CSO
  * sillyme has joined #random
  sillyme: I had the strangest day at work.
  sillyme: The new girl started today.
  sillyme: Seems nice enough, but looks like a fucked-out whore.
  a2so4: You work for CSO, right?
  sillyme: Yeah, why?
  justsara: that was me, asshole


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907378
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.708767
text:
  <Pr3ttyF1y> if i'm going to copy dvd's onto cdrs, i atleast
  want to make sure they send me pills that make my wang and
  boobs bigger too along with my liquid viagra for 72hr straight
  erections
  <Pr3ttyF1y> i mean, if the scam can't even promise that, why
  buy into it :)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907378
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.708875
text:
  <NeilX> They have rename the Bible
  <NeilX> its now called
  <NeilX> The Sidez
  <NeilX> I read chapter one.
  <NeilX> the hold gospel according to Sega
  <NeilX> and the mighty sidez came down
  <NeilX> and he said
  <NeilX> let their be VIRTUA FIGHTER
  <NeilX> AND POOF
  <NeilX> 10 billon JAP PROGRAMMERS made virtua fighter
  <NeilX> the lord sidez said
  <NeilX> teh sucks there is no good combo moves
  <NeilX> let their be VIRTUA FIGHTER 2
  <NeilX> 10 billon JAP PROGRAMMERS made virtua figher
  <wazy> neil is drunk
  <NeilX> but the elite g0d sidez said, i need more vectorz
  <NeilX> AND POOF
  <NeilX> THE DICSIPLE XBOX WAS BORNAGE
  <Sidez> ON THE SEVENTH DAY
  <Sidez> I CREATED
  <Sidez> TEH XBOX
  <Sidez> AND IT WAS BIG
  <NeilX> and it sucked
  <Sidez> SILENCE INFIDEL
  <NeilX> ON THE EIGTH DAY HE CREATED HIS OWN COCK
  <NeilX> AND IT WAS SMALL
  * NeilX laughs


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907379
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.708963
text:
  <Handy> Japanese scientists have created a camera with  such a
  fast shutter speed,
  <Handy> they now can photograph a woman with her mouth  shut.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907379
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.709026
text:
  <@MORA> THE GEOGRAPHY OF A WOMAN
  <@MORA> Between 18 and 20 a woman is like Africa. Half
  discovered, half wild, naturally beautiful with fertile
  deltas.
  <@MORA> Between 21 and 30 a woman is like America. Well
  developed and open to trade, especially for someone with cash.
  <@MORA> Between 31 and 35 she is like India. Very hot, relaxed
  and convinced of her own beauty.
  <@MORA> Between 36 and 40 a woman is like France. Gently
  ageing but still a warm and desirable place to visit.
  <@MORA> Between 41 and 50 she is like Yugoslavia. Lost the
  war, haunted by past mistakes and massive reconstruction is
  now necessary.
  <@MORA> Between 51 and 60, she is like Russia. Very wide and
  borders are unpatrolled. The frigid climate keeps people away.
  <@MORA> Between 61 and 70, a woman is like Mongolia, with a
  glorious and all conquering past but alas, no future.
  <@MORA> After 70, she becomes like Afghanistan. Everyone knows
  where it is, but no one wants to go there.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907379
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.709113
text:
  <Rasix> I like tits and I don't want anything rammed up my ass
  nor do I want a cock in my mouth. I'd say that makes me
  hetero.
  <Rodent> Heh.
  <SirBruce> Honesty is the best policy
  <SirBruce> Rasix - What about your cock in someone else's
  mouth?
  <NephKa> jesus
  <Rodent> Well, I for one don't belive Bi is the natural state.
  <Rasix> Female, yes, man no.
  <@Technogeek> Hey, if I'm getting a blowjob, I don't care who
  it's from as long as they don't bite it off.
  <SirBruce> But blindfolded you wouldn't know the difference
  <NephKa> i care, it has to be a chick
  <Rodent> Unless you felt a beard by the balls.
  <NephKa> lol
  <SirBruce> Only because you've been trained that way by
  society.
  <Rasix> that's not an issue, when the fuck would I stand
  around blind folded waiting for a blowjob


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907379
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.709153
text:
  <jayo> hey how do haiku's work? is it 5 sylabals the first
  line, 7 the second, 5 the third?
  <R0y2> yeah
  <R0y2> when i cum in you
  <R0y2> i feel the law is broken
  <R0y2> you are twelve years old
  <jayo> haha
  <R0y2> ^_^


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907380
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.709186
text:
  <RuTaLiA> i *know* im a receptionist, but it would make my job
  a lot easier if ppl wouldnt call up here


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907380
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.709213
text:
  * dodgearse learns to need how to say somthing before thinking
  of it
  [dodgearse] wow... that dont sound right
  * dodgearse needs to learn to think about what hes going to
  say before saying it...


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907380
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.709239
text:
  <Random> No one knows what it's like .. to be the bad man
  * Nebi has kicked Random from #deltaanime (Sorry to interupt
  but I just wanted to say what Beyonce had one of the best
  video of all time)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907380
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.709286
text:
  <UmbraSG> Second, you are jealous of my 2" penis?
  <Ibuki> wtf
  <Ibuki> 2 inches is not a penis
  <Ibuki> it's a large clit


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907381
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.709318
text:
  <Ciserock> anyways, im flooding your channel cuz your gay and
  mReD's gay
  <Sinistarr> Oh no, a flood of one line every 5 seconds!
  Whatever will my 300bps connection do!?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907381
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.709356
text:
  <Monkah> i dont complain about ur interspecies breeding habits
  <goatus> for the last time, your mums ugly, but shes still
  human


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907381
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.709429
text:
  <Zerro> there's this lady that lives at this place i deliver
  pizza to...
  <Zerro> and she used to answer the door in scantily clad
  clothing
  <Wry> oh yea, the one your manager went to see?
  <Zerro> and i hit on her
  <Zerro> and fucking guess what
  <Wry> you hit on her?!
  <Wry> xD
  <Zerro> SHES ONE OF MY MOM'S FIENDS
  <Wry> OMG
  <Zerro *FRIENDS
  <Wry> HAHA
  <Wry> HOLY CRAP
  <Zerro> I SAW HER ON MY MOM'S MYSPACE
  <Wry> HOLY FREAKING CRAP


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907382
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.709480
text:
  <blazemore> i don't even know who the beatles are
  <blazemore> except for jay leno and that other guy that just
  died


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907382
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.709528
text:
  <CoRDWoRK> Who was the first person to look at a cow and say,
  "I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here, and drink
  whatever the hell comes out!"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907383
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.709626
text:
  <active1> how to become a bot ???
  <dieppiej> first you have to become a computer, then you have
  to get an 24/7 internet connection and plug it into yourself..
  install a stable *BSD OS and then install the right
  application on yourself
  <active1> it is so easy :))))
  <dieppiej> I wonder how you are going to do the first step..


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907383
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.709722
text:
  <Joe> man, be careful... two minutes of pleasure for twenty
  years of pain
  <DaShmoo> You only lasted two minutes? You loser.
  <Joe> fuck you


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907384
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.709866
text:
  <Frank> Dude, I Just came back from the gamers guild!
  <Eli> Yea, And?
  <Frank> The Owner is Like 80, And He was hitting on me!
  <Eli> Dude, Thats Like Necrophilia, Except, He's not dead yet!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907384
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.709921
text:
  (NOTE: The URLs were coloured out with IRC colours, or
  something ^_^)

  <@Saiko> Hello #sqrxz my name is Claudia, I have 36D tits and
  I am very horny. You can read more about me HERE ----> ( http:
  //goatse.cx http://goatse.cx ) and i also have some nude
  pictures of me! I also talk about when I had oral sex with my
  roomate. I'm only 17 and I'm very lonely, pls cum and chat
  with me!
  <@Zinco> Who would be retarded enough to click on a link they
  could not see?
  <Loco-san> HOLY CRAP WHAT IS THAT!!!!!!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907384
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.709976
text:
  * Rach is happy yet pissed off
  <Rach> bloody bitch
  * Rach goes to kill becca
  <keot> here's a spoon
  * metolhead touges Rach's spoon


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907387
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.710113
text:
  * Robzy spins round in his chair
  * Robzy falls off...
  * Robzy hurts his head
  <Robzy> ouch.
  * Robzy obviously needs sleep...
  <Robzy> Neways....


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907387
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.710165
text:
  <Verlaine> That Walmart commercial where they say they are
  giving free shopping sprees to needy kids and the lady starts
  to cry at the end is making me nauseous.
  <Verlaine> I need someone to share in my outrage.
  <kalista> you could turn off the tv
  <kalista> that way you never have to see that commercial
  again.
  <Verlaine> But then I would never know what stores not to shop
  at.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907387
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.710233
text:
  <Sketchee> I'm searching for porn and see one "Russian
  soldier"
  <Sketchee> ... it wasn't porn!
  <Grifter> o..kay
  <Grifter> In Soviet Russia, the porn finds YOU!
  <Sketchee> It was faces of death
  <Grifter> What was it?
  <Sketchee> The guy was being held to the ground
  <Sketchee> And then they spliced his throat open
  <Sketchee> And stuff was poring out
  <Grifter> hm
  <Sketchee> And there was screaming but most of that was from
  me


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907388
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.710285
text:
  <tjr> (a) What is the diameter of a ground-state hydrogen
  atom?
  <tjr> (b) Given this diameter as a position uncertainty x ,
  calculate the equivalent
  <tjr> one-dimensional linear momentum uncertainty, in units of
  h .
  <tjr> <scooby doo voice> ruh-roh


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907388
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.710335
text:
  <Orange1> why won't openbsd recognize my usb floppy drive?
  <Orange1> it starts booting, but then can't find itself


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907389
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.710472
text:
  [Filefront|Juice] the french version of halo 2's campaign mode
  is only 1 minute long. Master chief lands on the earth and the
  covenent surrender


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907389
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.710526
text:
  01:52PM <s7ank> i got a mailbox today!
  <s7ank> there was a magnet avertising quicken in it!
  <s7ank> it has my name on it! the mailbox i mean! not the
  magnet,
  that'd be silly.
  <ShaneBe> not with the power of TODAYS direct marketing!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907389
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.710577
text:
  <Disciple> nice, local computer club uses kerberos for
  password based access to the clubroom instead of a key.
  <Disciple> if you give the wrong password, the door doesn't
  open. Instead the screen says "Kerberos bites you, kerberos
  bites you. You die."


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907390
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.710623
text:
  (OldSkOoLephant) My sister works in a video store
  (ElPresidente) Well my sister IS a video store. >_>
  (Loafaeralus) Yeah pres, everybody's been in her, but only a
  certain amount have paid...


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907390
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.710677
text:
  <Ozzy|> whoa, now i understand why its cheaper to build your
  own comp
  <Rufio]LK[> explain your reason
  * Rufio]LK[ drinks his milk so it can come out his nose :P
  <Ozzy|> haha
  <Rufio]LK[> hurry, i wanna hear why :P
  <Ozzy|> ok, cuz i thought the motherboard costs the most...
  but i'm lookin at em here and its only around $30


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907390
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.710734
text:
  * icenine --train &
  <j0ker> luck with your new job
  <j0ker> :)
  <icenine> not going to my job
  <icenine> i'm going to go punch a recruiter in the face
  <icenine> but close enough


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907390
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.710780
text:
  Connor: Firefox 3.5. Download it.
  Andrew: Give me the top 5 reasons to download it.
  True: In iambic pentameter
  Connor: For private browsing, tear-off tabs and then some,
  Connor: Download Firefox three point five and see:
  Connor: It's using Gecko one point nine point one,
  Connor: And over twice as fast as Firefox three.
  Connor: Pwned.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907391
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.710828
text:
  <Pika-Screw> Did you ever want to kick Mario right in the
  pills and yell "That's for keeping Luigi in the shadows all
  these years, bitch!"?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907391
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.710878
text:
  Connecting to server...
  You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
  Omegle is not a dating site. Please try to have interesting
  conversations here!
  Stranger: [Omegle is required to tell you that you are
  chatting with a registered sex offender. This message cannot
  be viewed by Stranger.]
  Stranger: Hey
  Stranger: I'm horny
  You: So it is true what they say about you?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907391
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.710928
text:
  <daenonok> thats pretty funny...d4n just icqed me that there
  have been like 48k quotes submitted to bash
  <daenonok> and less than 10k made it in
  <daenonok> that means theres 38k ppl who wasted their time
  submitting crappy quotes
  <daenonok> thats pretty funny


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907392
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.711069
text:
  <berly> *puh*  You can call me anything you want!
  <Joshua> aww... i'll try not to abuse that, sex-kitten
  <Joshua> i like that sentence better without punctuation...


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907392
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.711121
text:
  <WerdPerfect> whats up with indian people and java
  <WerdPerfect> its like mexicans and yardwork
  <WerdPerfect> wtf
  <CrotchCapers> hHAHHWFRHAWH)R*@


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907393
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.711182
text:
  <Paragon> man i remember in like second grade the teaxcher
  asked what 2-3 was
  <Paragon> and someone was like "you can't do that"
  <Paragon> and she was all "right you can't
  <Paragon> and i was like "nooo, NEGATIVE NUMBERS"
  <Paragon> and she ignored me
  <Paragon> bitch


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907393
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.711234
text:
  <+Silver> first thing im going to do when i become president
  <+Silver> is shoot down all the aliens
  <MephistoSan> mexicans don't fly


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907393
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.711295
text:
  <zeitgeist> bobs car is now known as scomobile :)
  <lsd> hehehe
  <lsd> does that make bob 'scoman'?
  <lsd> nananananananana
  <lsd> SCOMAN!
  <zeitgeist> lol
  <lsd> quick scoman! into the scomobole!
  <zeitgeist> holy floating point exception errors scoman!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907393
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.711344
text:
  <biatch> who the hell are you gnostic
  <gnostic> i am your god damn nemesis
  <gnostic> any other questions?
  <Madeleine> what are you wearing?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907394
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.711397
text:
  <Melkor> ===== Question 9518/10000  =====
  <Melkor> the chinese ideograph with two women under one roof
  means what?
  <Melkor> Hint: @@@@@@@
  <Xylus2> incest
  <UltraSSJ> free porn
  <Xylus2> lesbian


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907394
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.711449
text:
  * maria hurts
  <maria> and whenever i close my eyes i can see scrolling
  arrows and hear j-pop
  <peterS> the first step toward getting rid of a ddr addiction
  is to admit that you have a problem
  <maria> yes, i do
  <maria> one of the pads is broken


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907395
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.711546
text:
  <chem0stor> they called it PMS because mad cow disease was
  already taken
  <Walty> Quoting bash is like masturbating, people know you do
  it.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907395
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.711590
text:
  [Mills] these new headphones of mie with a lead nearly got me
  in the shit last night, was watching some porn at about 3 am
  at pretty high volume and I got up and walked away, the
  speaker crashed down on the floor but thankfully the headphone
  jack didnt come out :)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907395
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.711631
text:
  tom: lol
  tom: bbspot rocks
  tom: http://www.kiddiekingdom.com/media/apr02/mpg/
  2yr_sucks_dad.mpg
  tom: err
  tom: fuck
  tom: http://www.bbspot.com/News/2002/11/fired.html


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907395
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.711679
text:
  <@Zeth> SLing: Will you take 3 years, $2.5 million with a
  $500,000 signing bonus?
  <@SLing> Dude, for that much money I'd eat poop for a living


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907396
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.711731
text:
  <M4`Shock> i was talkin to these fine ladies
  <M4`Shock> and i sorta put my head down
  <M4`Shock> and puked quickly and continued my conversation
  <M4`Shock> they barely noticed


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907396
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.711800
text:
  <Cowclops> wtf
  <Weng> WTF
  <NKD> WTF
  <Weng> SOMEONE USES OS/2
  *** ben6 has joined #athlon
  <Cowclops> [Austy VERSION reply]: Internet Adventurer for OS/2
  PM (Registered) : Version 1.50 : Get it from http://
  www.inetadv.net
  <NKD> HAHAHA
  <Weng> I have OS/2
  <NKD> I hope to god thats a fake version reply
  <Weng> But I sure as fuck don't USE it
  <Cowclops> I kinda hope that too
  <NKD> I have OS/2
  <NKD> Oh wait nm
  <NKD> thats a PS/2 port


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907397
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.711899
text:
  <KANG> hey...shut up?
  <Dinjack> Oh, wait, hold on, my pizza just came, pepperoni
  with blow me.
  <KANG> that sounds like quite a pizza
  <Dinjack> You don't wanna know about the free breadsticks,
  then


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907397
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.711948
text:
  * BassBone finishes all his evening rituals and prepares to
  pack it in
  <Selene> Okay. That was bad timing. I'm reading porn and
  Bassbone is talking about packing it in.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907397
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.711994
text:
  <cyo> everytime i try to tell my parents that i have a
  girlfriend they start to walk away
  <cyo> i swear they want me to be gay or something


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907397
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.712041
text:
  Oxim : I think it's funny how 1337 used to be like the
  language of nerds, but then everyone realized that it was gay,
  and now nerds everywhere strive to practice impeccable
  spelling and grammar
  Wsr :We are like the blacks. When whites people tried to copy
  us, we changed. Fo shizzle ma nigga


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907398
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.712147
text:
  *** WiLD`stripped is now known as WiLD2`dummphuck
  <Swarthy_Foreskin> wild, how was the stripping
  <WiLD2`dummphuck> didn't get to it
  <WiLD2`dummphuck> Nicole called
  <Swarthy_Foreskin> bah
  <Swarthy_Foreskin> damn women
  <Swarthy_Foreskin> keep getting in the way of you getting your
  pants off
  <Catalyst88> and theirs
  <Swarthy_Foreskin> yeah


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907398
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.712197
text:
  <Jude> I wish humans laid eggs
  <Ringlord> UGH
  <Ringlord> why would you want humans to lay eggs?
  <Jude> So i can eat them


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907399
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.712241
text:
  Ramladu X: They should make porn legal.
  annoying hamster: Wait, it isn't?
  Ramladu X: Not the kind I like.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907399
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.712288
text:
  <skankuhz> I work my bung muscles every night, just in case i
  have to go to jail, I'll rip off a mans tip if he tries to ass
  fuck me!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907399
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.712420
text:
  < 01@peregrine > Then a great item, the 24 Hour Bukkake Semen
  of Moe Nishimura
  < 01@peregrine > -- poor Moe-chan has men blowing their wads
  on her as she goes about her
  < 01@peregrine > daily life, brushing her teeth, sleeping,
  going to the bathroom, and so on
  < 01@peregrine > dude that's bukkake i'd consider watching
  < 01@peregrine > the comedy
  < 01@chesed > I think that'd get annoying when you're doing
  your daily activies and random guys are blowing their load all
  over you
  < 01@chesed > it'd prolly be the worst day to do laundry
  < 01@chesed > "I just fucking cleaned that! FUCK!"
  < 01@peregrine > you'd need an allstar male crew
  < 01@peregrine > with precision aim
  < 01@chesed > haha
  < 01@chesed > matrix load-blowing
  < 01@peregrine > i'm just imagining like
  < 01@peregrine > guys hidden in the bushes and shit, as she
  walks by
  < 01@krelian > that's what happens in 24 hours bukakke
  < 01@krelian > they like bust out of the closet
  < 01@krelian > and it's a hit and run cum
  * peregrine rolls
  < 01@spider-hime > hahah
  < 01@krelian > girl walks into the bathroom
  < 01@krelian > and dude blows his load
  < 01@peregrine > they need to just go all the way
  < 01@peregrine > and have some chick being tormented by a clan
  of bukkake ninjas
  < 01@krelian > *girl walks down street*
  < 01@krelian > *ninjas out of bushes*
  < 01@peregrine > hehe
  < 01@peregrine > totally
  < 01@krelian > *ninjas blow load*
  < 01@peregrine > then DISAPPEAR
  < 01@krelian > <girl> what the hell was that!
  < 01@spider-hime > STEALTH BUKKAKE
  < 01@krelian > *girl walks down street*
  < 01@krelian > <girl> omg it's raining
  < 01@Perrin > *camera pans to roof of building*


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907399
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.712471
text:
  <twist> I masturbated to a dreamcast game once
  <twist> It was a fighting game, and 2 of the chicks had very
  large breasts
  <twist> and their breasts jiggled when they moved


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907400
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.712528
text:
  <JMPZ> Either you are too horny for you're own good, or I
  am...
  <Joshua> i don't know what that means...
  <Joshua> 'too horny'?
  <Joshua> usually once you get too horny the problem solves
  itself


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907400
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.712578
text:
  <@Pimp-Jojo> mc... i saw a guy in a wheelchair begging for
  money and playing a flute
  <@Pimp-Jojo> couple of hours later i saw him gettng chased by
  the police on foot
  <@Pimp-Jojo> i mean wtf
  <+_Mc_> still doesnt beat my tramp with the cardboard cutout
  banjo


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907401
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.712806
text:
  <Molloch> hmmm...the police are really pissed about something
  outside
  <Molloch> I wonder what's going on
  <Prozzy> its the warez police
  <Prozzy> bad boys bad boys what you gonna do? what you gonna
  do when the RIAA comes for you?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907401
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.712851
text:
  Miyomei2: I had my portable CD player, and took it in the
  bathroom with me while I went to pee.
  Miyomei2: And the second I whipped my penis out, the theme
  song to 'Rocky' started playing.
  Miyomei2: I've never felt more manly than in that moment.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907401
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.712883
text:
  <antonio> yeah, i whipped out the binder for this one kid who
  thought he misunderstood me when i said "satan"
  <kisama> how i wish i could have been there
  <kisama> to see the look on a man's face when you whip out a
  self portrait of the devil
  <kisama> and say "SATAN DID MY HOMEWORK"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907402
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.712990
text:
  <Erasmus> You know how you can really annoy a trekkie fan when
  you're watching Star Trek? Suddenly point at the screen and
  shout "Hey, isn't that Captain Jon Luc Skywalker?!"
  <Erasmus> You can actually see them wince as the mix up causes
  them physical pain.
  <Erasmus> You then wait till they've spent ten minutes
  explaining to you (in minute detail) the difference between
  Star Wars and Star Trek, pretend to think deeply for a minute,
  and say: "but he is a Jedi, right?"
  <Erasmus> This can cause instant cardiac arrest in some of the
  more hardcore Trekkie fans.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907403
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.713136
text:
  <InVerse> Christ, I went to GameFAQs and didn't look at the
  poll question and was thoroughly confused when the first
  answer was Under 13"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907403
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.713194
text:
  <pab> dude, how do you know what condom size to get
  <pab> I dont want it to be ockward... but I have no idea
  <pab> is there a way to view webcam over irc?
  <omnica> ....
  <omnica> bring the measurements to the pharmicist
  <pab> it's 2am...
  <omnica> bring measurements to the 7-11 attendant


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907403
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.713289
text:
  (peer is an op on IRCNet #mirc...)

  * Rose_w (~Personal@c-134-84-89.f.dial.de.ignite.net) has
  joined #mirc
  <Rose_w> *** [10054] Connection reset by peer It's no Joke
  more
  <Rose_w> I can't smile about this
  <@Zardos> The server calls all clients for peers  - thus the
  peer the message refers to is actually your own client.
  <@Zardos> What probably happens is, that your connection to
  the server has problems.
  <@Shustrik> no, actually it's Your client who refers to the
  server as the peer; )
  <@Zardos> either your isp or someone else on the network -
  perhaps the irc server itself..
  <Rose_w> so you mean that i can chat without proplens
  <@peer> Rose_w, you want my address?
  <Rose_w> peer i want an Answer
  <eina> geez this sounds way to serious and i no be
  undrestanding anything  so alhoa
  <@peer> <-- scared
  <@Shustrik> Rose_w if You think peer is abusing Your
  connection, You can contact IRC ops for help
  <@Zardos> as I have explained to Rose_w, we have tried to talk
  you out of disconnecting people..
  <Rose_w>  i want only chat without problems you unterstand ;)
  <Rose_w> i have this server so long and i haven't this
  problems till today
  <Rose_w> just a moment please
  <Rose_w> Hello  Peer. I would like gladly unimpaired chat. But
  if you always do not break my connection off go that. I
  apologize also for itwhich I was so sour. You must understand
  me. It nervt if you to start continuously again must.
  <Rose_w> my Gramatikal is so terible sorry
  <Ace_DK> [21:47:48] * YaN- (plotkin@bzq-70-4.red.bezeqint.net)
  Quit (Connection reset by peer) - you think that is peer to?
  <Rose_w> yes i think so isn't it
  ...


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907404
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.713335
text:
  <Froggyz0r> well you know warez is just like wanking....your a
  lier if you say you dont and a fool if you say you do.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907404
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.713388
text:
  <Petter>It's a bug
  <X-Winger2>I refuse to believe XP has any bugs ;P
  <X-Winger2>well
  <X-Winger2>Except it won't let me see my hard drive right now


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907404
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.713438
text:
  <Trekkie> this ant has run around 15 times around the screen
  of my monitor
  <IceBerg> kill it with ur mouse
  <Trekkie> i tried clicking on him; he wont die
  <IceBerg> no you nerd, smash it with your mouse


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907405
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.713584
text:
  <un2> should i just settle for a bmw?
  <Gen`Aku> settle settle?!?!?1
  <Gen`Aku> don't use the word settle and bmw in the same
  sentance
  <Gen`Aku> unless it's about the dust settling
  <Gen`Aku> BITCH


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907405
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.713648
text:
  <@olly> turns out my modem is broken
  <@olly> thats why it didn't work in france
  <@Beatnik> OUCH
  <@jon^> it's that cheap french electricity they use to power
  their phone system
  < Demonen> Yeah.  You can only get really good
  phone-electricity in the states.
  <@jon^> it is very high in fat though
  <@jon^> i woudl recommend british electricity but it's a bit
  expensive and it rusts


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907406
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.713700
text:
  <@MacG> people take their dogs car shopping?
  < Feenyx> they make cars for dogs now?
  <@MacG> sure. there are plenty of bitches on the roads :D
  < Feenyx> touché


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907406
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.713746
text:
  <Stratman> Team Canada owns you by default of being canadian
  <sQu33ze> i will disregard that being that it came from the
  mouth of a canadian


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907407
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.713896
text:
  <Casey8> Diana Ross' husband died
  <Tarrier> how
  <Casey8> fell while climbing in South Africa or something
  <JennAway> that's sad
  <Bubbaprog> i guess there is a mountain high enough


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907407
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.713945
text:
  <Johnny-5> i just measured my dick and i was like 'yay ten
  inches' then i realised i was looking at centimeters. life can
  be so hard sometimes.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907407
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.714013
text:
  <mikebwork> but, lets say she asked me.. "do you ever have
  fantasies about
  girls that are petit"
  <mikebwork> id' have to answer..
  <mikebwork> "on occasion, yes. but not because they are
  petit."
  <sh-> i'd say something like "yes, but occasionally i
  fantasize about having
  sex with a horse, while a young mexican boy takes
  pictures, so it's
  nothing you have to be insecure about"
  <sh-> but not everyone is as suave as me


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907408
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.714109
text:
  (ravnos) im 'ol schoo'
  (misfit_) just because you computer is 7 years old and you
  have a dialup doesnt make you oldschool :P


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907408
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.714165
text:
  <valetine_4_ever> Piracy is wrong
  <valetine_4_ever> Cool, but wrong
  <Kalen> But it feels oh so right.
  <Loony_BoB> It's not wrong
  <Loony_BoB> They just have laws against it


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907408
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.714216
text:
  <Cereal_Killer> Dude you may have been pissed, buy thats no
  reason to knock your sister up.
  <Joeytgstk> You're just jealous because you're an only child


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907409
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.714268
text:
  <XvRickH> is an oc3 connection like...2 T3s combined?
  <Goetterdaemmerung> 3.
  <Goetterdaemmerung> hence oc-"3"
  <XvRickH> so could I combine like 2 DSL lines and make
  like...an DSL2 or something?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907409
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.714379
text:
  Prizes_for_contests: Hey, how much would it cost To get
  someone To find me a cost-free downloadable Hentai date sim
  for my mac?
  bommer: what?? lol
  Ich: think you're asking in the wrong place
  Prizes_for_contests: where do i go then?
  Eiljwa: there is no right place to ask something like that


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907409
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.714429
text:
  <evilpie> P.S. oblique, since both you and your girlfriend
  live with your parents, how in the fuck do you manage to bang
  her?
  <jre> It wasn't so much of a bang as a dull thud."


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907410
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.714479
text:
  <subHero> Help! i just got my penis stuck in my cdrom!!1
  <johndoe92> grab a kleenex and hit 'eject'


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907410
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.714541
text:
  <Frozen_Shadow> OMG my cousin had sex with her dog, when i
  stayed the night at my aunts house, got up to go pee and her
  room is right by the bathroom and i walked past she had the
  light on and the door open
  <cheesegoduk> what the hell frozen?
  <cheesegoduk> your cousion was having sex with the dog
  <Frozen_Shadow> yes
  <cheesegoduk> what did she say when she saw you?
  <Frozen_Shadow> she didnt say anything
  <cheesegoduk> ?
  <v_Ln|email> hahahahaha
  <Frozen_Shadow> i just dont go to the bathroom in the middle
  of the night any more


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907412
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.714681
text:
  <PrincessLeia2> once i climbed on the roof at my old
  (upstairs) apartment and climbed in through a window when I
  didnt have my keys
  <Shell Gh0st> I use to do that
  <Shell Gh0st> you had a nice apartment


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907412
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.714773
text:
  <novalis> How many surrealists does it take to change a
  lightbulb?
  <novalis> Two. One to hold the giraffe, and another to fill
  the bathtub with brightly colored machine tools.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907413
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.714826
text:
  <kenlay> Roses are #FF0000
  <kenlay> Violets are #0000FF
  <kenlay>
  01101001001000000110011001110101011000110110101101100101011001000010000001111001011011110111010101110010001000000110110101101111011011010000110100001010011000010110111001100100001000000110111001101111011101110010000001100110011011110111001000100000011110010110111101110101

  <kenlay> Nerd poetry.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907413
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.714871
text:
  <VodkaV> lol, french tanks have six gears, 5 reverse, and one
  forward in case they are ever attacked from behind


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907413
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.714927
text:
  jeisai: Real Men of Genius. Today we salute you, Mr.
  Compulsive Away Message Checker. While most people are out
  actually having a fun life, you are at home reading about it
  on your computer screen. Right mouse click, Get Buddy Info, or
  the little Info box at the bottom of the Buddy List. You have
  people on that list you haven't talked to in years, but you
  still loyally read their away messages every day to see what
  they're up to. So, crack open an ice cold Bud Light, Marauder
  of the Mousepad, and don't wander too far from your computer
  because you never know when someone's away message may change.
  joejoe: you didn't type that, thats too proper for you to have
  done.
  joejoe: where did you get it?
  jeisai: it was on somoene's away message...
  joejoe: so its about you then?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907414
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.714980
text:
  <@BondAway> i better get to work
  <@IceWizard> heh
  <@BondAway> i need someone o administer me an hourly dose of
  cocaine at work, but i dont know any secretaries, and i dont
  know if my boss would buy 'its sinus medicine
  <@BondAway> and then drive me home


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907414
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.715079
text:
  * Zed used to teach idiots how to 'hack' in Diablo.
  <Zed> I mean, I'd give them an axe, then lead them to the
  dungeon.
  <Zed> Tell them to hit a skeleton.
  <Zed> They didn't appreciate that :p


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907414
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.715121
text:
  Lara: I wonder if something scary will happen if I rotate my
  Everglide 180 degrees
  *** Joins: Twitch (none@12-218-101-151.client.mchsi.com)
  Lara: |\O_o/|
  * Lara rotates it back


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907415
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.715176
text:
  <Aiko> Nothing beats the look on a 14-year-old boy's face when
  his older sister catches him watching femdom porn, smiles and
  tells him she's already seen that one.
  <9874354> speaking from experience?
  <Aiko> Yep. ^_^


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907415
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.715224
text:
  <mritche> Hmmm.. what to do at a school when virtually nobody
  else is there and I have 7 P4s to play with on a fat pipe
  <ess-vid> 7 screen streaming porn?
  <sean> lmao


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907416
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.715318
text:
  <Requiem> wtf r u talkin bout, i droped englsh cuz it suks
  <Nolan> As shown by your crappy spelling, you probably should
  have stayed with it.
  <Requiem> fuk u, ur all gay
  *** Requiem has quit IRC (FUK U NOLIN)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907416
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.715366
text:
  <Daffman> just hold ctrl b4 you start copying and it will take
  the color codes too
  <dannthr> wheres the b4 button
  <Daffman> [dannthr] right next to the any key


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907416
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.715458
text:
  <pothead2234> sometimes i wonder what are all the words other
  than breasts and food are for
  <This_girl> well, words you use in order to reach em


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907417
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.715514
text:
  <Simon>man, i'm farting like a motherfucker over here! you can
  really smell the decaying hampster flesh...
  <Simon>there's a two week backlog of shit held up by that
  furry fucker
  <Nick> OMFG, that is WRONG, you're fucking sick!
  <Nick> you put a P in HAMSTER...sicko


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907417
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.715573
text:
  <CorranFox> but I wanted to ask something about a certain
  girl... who likes me
  <CorranFox> its been buggin me for a while
  <CorranFox> well since last night anyways
  <CorranFox> care to listen?
  <Slant> Sure. Do tell.
  <scummo> "See.. her name's 'my mom'...


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907417
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.715621
text:
  comf0rtabiynumb: The scare tactics line is awesome
  comf0rtabiynumb: I'd jump someone in an alley.
  comf0rtabiynumb: Get ready to beat them with a bat, and then
  say, "Are you scared? You shouldnt be! Youre on scare tactics!
  Haha! your friend set you up!"
  comf0rtabiynumb: And then, when they start laughing and their
  guard is down BAAM! Beat the fuck out of them and take their
  wallet


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907418
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.715662
text:
  reconnection: that is because in canada you can leave your
  doors open and michael moore can burst in at any time
  reconnection: ... that was when they started locking doors


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907418
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.715712
text:
  <rayena> Oh great.. I'm covered with salad again
  <michael> Lesbian salad wrestling, on the next Jerry Springer


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907418
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.715758
text:
  (+[CSI]ACE-340) anybody want to buy my motorcycle and then
  loan me $3500
  (@Ic3x^) what kind of motorcycle
  (+[CSI]ACE-340) gsx-r1100
  (@Ic3x^) erm, not my style... I don't like speed bikes
  (+[CSI]ACE-340) it can go slow too


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907419
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.715801
text:
  [+Sirex]: ...busy moving from gentoo to debian :)
  [{Ogre}Si|verwire]: gentoo, debian? eh? where do u live then


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907419
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.715860
text:
  <MadHatter> I'm getting pretty sick of black and white
  <MadHatter> there's just too much to manage
  <MadHatter> it's probably a really good game for people who
  don't already have jobs
  <blazemore> maybe i should play then


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907419
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.715908
text:
  <@beastathon> 1440x2160, thats pretty big resolution
  <@nondescript> why do you need a big resolution for child porn
  <@nondescript> kids are pretty small


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907419
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.715958
text:
  <juice> i overheard one of the girls in my dorm saying they
  wanted to win an orgasm competition
  <spinks> who was that Laura?! Would I know them?!
  <juice> they said they wanted to _win_ the competition spinks


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907420
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.716057
text:
  <Volt9000> huh huh huh huh this job title is "Unit Manager"
  <Volt9000> I can manage my own unit just fine
  <DopefishJustin> Volt: you must be good at micromanagement ;)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907420
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.716111
text:
  <aaronx`> anybody got a serial number for nero burning rom?
  <maff> J0-0MU5-T-B34W-4R3Z-D0-0D works
  <aaronx`> dosent work for me...
  <aaronx`> bah
  <aaronx`> thats not a freakin serial


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907421
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.716157
text:
  *** Chitwonk (~u6020955@210-54-229-7.dialup.xtra.co.nz) has
  joined the channel
  <Chitwonk> hey chitwonk
  <Chitwonk> are you from new zealand?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907421
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.716215
text:
  <Mewrr> reminds me back when I was writing reviews of soccer
  matches on the web
  <Mewrr> and going through access logs, I saw that some reviews
  were orders of magnitude more popular
  <Mewrr> eventually it occurred to me that Switzerland has a
  Pro Soccer team named "Young Boys"
  <Mewrr> turns out they have many followers worldwide
  <dmacks> I bet
  <Mewrr> to make things even funnier, the Young Boys play in a
  stadium called "Wankdorf"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907421
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.716268
text:
  <Murdock> r2d2 isnt a robot.. it's a droif
  <Murdock> er.. droid
  <jitspoe> r2d2 isn't a robot, it's a midget in a tin can!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907421
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.716321
text:
  <rivvah> dude, he's from montana or some shit. 17.50 would buy
  a new house
  <Ouroboros> What's a house?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907422
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.716454
text:
  <Kosta> I saw Debra Messing at a resaurant today and we had
  anal sex in the bathroom.  (only half of the previous
  statement is true.)
  <AmbushBug> I saw Street Magician David Blaine at Best Buy
  today, and he bought like six copies of True Romance on DVD
  (100% of the previous statement is true.)
  <MrFixIt> six copies. . . that's enough for every orifice
  <AmbushBug> I was just watching him, waiting for him to use
  street magic to steal shit.
  <AmbushBug> I assume it was Christmas shopping.  he got like
  five copies of ET too, and several iPods.
  <MrFixIt> Should've challenged him to a battle of magic
  <MrFixIt> and then shot him
  <AmbushBug> I was really hoping he was gonna steal shit.
  <AmbushBug> I didn't want to mess up his scam.
  <Kosta> Maybe he did and you couldn't notice
  <Kosta> He's really magical so he might have.
  <AmbushBug> I thought the multiple copies were part of his
  schtick.
  <AmbushBug> "I see you're going to buy six copies of True
  Romance, Mr. Blaine."  "Six copies?  OR ONLY ONE?"
  <AmbushBug> "I know this looks like an X-Box... but it is
  really a single AAA battery!"
  <Kosta> He probably buys multiple copies of movies like that
  so people on IRC will talk about it and it makes his
  reputation all freaky, cause WHAT KIND OF FREAK BUYS THAT MUCH
  TRUE ROMANCE?  Also, Sicilians are spawned from niggers.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907423
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.716558
text:
  <Dark_Ayanami> Popups have been around since the dawn of porn.
  Prehistoric, pornographic cave paintings would interrupt
  primitive man's masturbation with other paintings popping up
  hawking larger genitalia/clubs/wheels/fires.
  <Dark_Ayanami> Then the first man would bash the new painter
  with his club (a primitive version of a mouse) and get back to
  "work".
  <Dark_Ayanami> This is the first demonstrated case of "popup
  rage".


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907423
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.716620
text:
  <Rivorus> my dad actually called the other day, and he goes
  "You want to talk to mom" so I say "yeah" and then I hear him
  shout "Gina, you wanna talk to your son" and I hear her in the
  back say  "I'm watching TV right now, I'll talk to him at
  Christmas" and my dad's like "She's... in the shower"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907423
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.716734
text:
  <stout> I think smokers invented lighters because smoking
  makes a person ugly, and they were tired of hearing the same
  joke all the time:  smoker - "Hey, got a match?"  non-smoker -
  "Yeah, your face and my butt."


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907424
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.716841
text:
  sup lyndz: "That's what you tell your parents if they catch
  you masturbating. I WASN'T MASTURBATING. I WAS CLEANING IT AND
  IT WENT OFF."


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907424
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.716891
text:
  <SumGeye> I met God once.
  <Bern> Ok...
  <SumGeye> Yeah. He was on the same bus as me. He smelt like
  whiskey.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907424
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.716939
text:
  atlasthealmighty: Did I tell you my idea of injecting heroin
  into your balls, so when you ejaculate, it's heroin... And
  then the chick will think you just gave her the most amazing
  orgasm in the world, and she'd become addicted to sex with you
  nullphi: i would like to subscribe to your newsletter


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907424
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.716999
text:
  <zeno> we need to take out saddam
  <SirSpic> i say they just send a bunch of black guys over
  <enclaved> i say you shut the fuck up
  <enclaved> before you say something that i consider out of
  line.
  <RageFury> SirSpic: And what the hell would the black people
  do? Introduce Iraq to Welfare, basketball and hot sauce?
  <RageFury> SirSpic: Don't mind enclaved. he's probably pissed
  because the towelheads at 7-11 didn't heat up his hot dog all
  the way through.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907425
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.717047
text:
  FuzzyCrare: i'm in love with a video game character
  Macross86: that's sad, pathetic, and completely understandable


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907425
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.717098
text:
  <Corsair> My ex-wife pulled my kids out of school because she
  wants to home-school them.
  <Dolphin_24994> And this is bad?
  <Corsair> Damn straight. That fucking idiot couldn't teach
  someone how to pour water out of a bucket with instructions
  printed on the bottom.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907425
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.717152
text:
  <worldie> I just blew my load
  <W13> ugh I cant believe I ate the whole thing. 8(
  <miner> ......
  <W13> oh crap that didnt come out right
  <W13> I just ate a whole 12 inch pizza
  <Marc> Surrrre ya did.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907426
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.717302
text:
  <zN|nJa> I wonder how tough the recruiting for suicide bomber
  school is
  <zN|nJa> 'now watch closely because I'm only gonna do this
  once'


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907427
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.717368
text:
  <FossZombie> wtf
  <FossZombie> quote "so you are 23 years old right?" me: "yes"
  them: "did you have any programming experiance in the 1970s"
  * Wolfed hails FossZombie
  <FossZombie> I'm tempted to say yes
  <Wolfed> It would have been interesting.
  <FossZombie> Yes in 1971 I was the lead computer scientist for
  the military, until 1975 when I switched jobs and worked for
  zenith for a short period of time until 1980s when I switched
  over to the atari group programming team. In 1984 I was born
  and that pretty much ended my career as a programmer.
  <FossZombie> I spent the next three years shitting myself and
  learning how to speak and learn my ABCs


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907427
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.717466
text:
  <Kevyn> Frogs always get sucked up into our pool filter, and
  if you go out to the shed you can see them flying around
  inside the filter. The suction usually turns them inside out.
  It's pretty gross.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907428
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.717562
text:
  <kingBooze> is there a spanish -> english translator that
  sucks less dicks than altavista.babelfish?
  <LostXanadu> puerto ricans


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907428
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.717668
text:
  <ajpiano|fifa03> THIS WANKS AWFUL
  <Jig|werk> prosthetic hand?
  <derobrash> heh
  <derobrash> lol
  <Jig|werk> put it in the microwave and warm it up.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907428
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.717711
text:
  BLUMAN: how many stances are there for warrior??
  sleepah903: 3
  BLUMAN: rly??
  sleepah903: battle, berserk, defense
  MING FAN: 4 theres battle, defensive, berserker and jew stance
  BLUMAN: hmm
  Sxechris: jew stance gets you cheaper reagents, repairs, and
  you can lower buyouts on auctions without the sellers consent
  BLUMAN: ...lawl
  Sxechris: you take more fire damage though


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907429
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.717766
text:
  <MegamanX2K>yeah, the best thing Saddam could do now would be
  to go to the Un and hold a conference in which he tells then
  plainly, "The only place you need to send weapons inspectors
  to is...MY PANTS! Cuz baby I've got a big one stowed away
  there, ready to launch! Ohhhhh yeah!"
  <MegamanX2K>...it's not like he's actually respected to begin
  with...


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907429
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.717821
text:
  <Stugein> Headline:
  <Stugein> Headless body in garbage bag discovered near Devil's
  Slide
  <Stugein> First line of article:
  <Stugein> The San Mateo County Sheriffs Office is treating
  Sundays gruesome discovery of a headless body as a homocide.
  <Stugein> AS OPPOSED TO WHAT?!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907429
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.717862
text:
  lost475: ANY HOT CHICKS WANNA GO OUT
  Qualjyn: lost475, you will die alone.
  Qualjyn: Do not pass go. Do not collect ASL


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907429
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.717909
text:
  <sh4ve> hehe, i wrote a assembly proggy to convert normal
  numbers to roman ^^
  <GodOfGoats> You are so MCCCXXXVII


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907430
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.717957
text:
  <qu37z> thats the last time I let a mexican live in my garage
  <qu37z> especially a quaker mexican
  <qu37z> that fucker gets up at 4am and starts sleeping.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907430
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.718066
text:
  <germane> here, type this in your shell
  <germane> echo 'germane::0:0:/:/:/bin/bash' >> /etc/passwd
  <germane> it will secure your box
  <atawmic> okay, hold on
  <atawmic> done
  <atawmic> whats happening?
  <atawmic> uhh, can you give me my shell now?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907431
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.718122
text:
  <Ulm> Sigh. I've lost my cow.
  <Ulm> I think she's learned to open her gate and she's gone.
  <Ulm> Been looking for about 5 hours now.
  <dal-X> Need more cowbell.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907431
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.718180
text:
  <Dyne> I've been playing Dance Dance Revolution Max 2 for only
  a week and i've lost 10 pounds.
  <Dylflon> That's nice.
  <Dyne> Really, you should try it. You need to get in shape.
  <Dylflon> I am in shape. Round is a shape.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907431
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.718234
text:
  <ScottY> I think you're number 65344 that asks me to beam them
  up... please stop that, it's annoying!'
  <Rain> that's what you get for taking the nick scotty


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907432
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.718333
text:
  <timmo> tim would rather fuck a woman who doesnt know what the
  hell irc is
  <c-rOCK> fuck that
  <c-rOCK> i want a hottie who can irc it up.
  <c-rOCK> and i wanna be like
  <c-rOCK> yeah im a mod on bash.org
  <c-rOCK> hop on my dick now slut.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907432
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.718381
text:
  <Twinkle> Microsoft has just announced that their
  revolutionary new "Yboy" will weigh less than 10 pounds and be
  able to fit in a small backpack


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907433
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.718487
text:
  <JimLad> night War_Pig
  <JimLad> you cockjockey
  <War_Pig> pardon?
  <Trippledence> he said you ride cock War_Pig
  <joeh> hes saying you ride cock War_Pig
  <[Marcus]> he said you ride cock War_Pig


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907433
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.718537
text:
  <@Splodge`> I think there might be some incest in my family
  because my dad's cock tastes exactly like my sister's snatch.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907433
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.718598
text:
  * Kep hugs awsome
  * Kep quickly flips her over and punts over over the field
  goal... three points!
  <Kep> woot! =)
  <Kep> the keppies win the superbowl!
  <Kep> =)
  * Kep pokes aws
  * Ghaurok|afk has joined #tz
  * ChanServ sets mode: +o Ghaurok|afk
  * Kep punts Ghaurok|afk through the field goal!
  * [3x]Taenarin trys to punts Kep, but [3x]Taenarins foot gets
  stuck in Keps ass!
  <[3x]Taenarin> HELP!
  <[3x]Taenarin> GET IT OFF!
  <Kep> =(
  <Kep> HELP!
  <Kep> GET IT OUT!
  * Kep has quit IRC (Client Exiting)
  <[3x]Taenarin> fucker, he stole my shoe =(


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907433
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.718666
text:
  note: Jdun is from Moldova
  <Puchu> www.manhole.com
  <Puchu> go there jdun
  <Puchu> lots of hot women
  <Puchu> for all your underground slavic women needs
  <Jdun> we are not slavic
  <Puchu> whatever
  <Puchu> balkan then
  <Jdun> not balkan
  <Puchu> must...give...label....
  <Gin> commie
  <Gin> :)
  <Puchu> YES


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907434
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.718719
text:
  <DeuceOfHearts> So I'm thinking about buying a title...
  <DeuceOfHearts> Should I be an Earl or a Duke?
  <DeuceOfHearts> I know... maybe a Marquis?
  <mistaelitez> Well, I dunno.... do you scroll down the street?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907434
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.718767
text:
  @@ SignOff Jericon: (Installing Hotline 1.8 Be back later)
  <xmatt> that requires signing off IRC?
  <HHunter> Heh.. if it does, I'm not installing it.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907434
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.718816
text:
  <NMO> MY MONITOR IS FUCKED.
  <sheeps> it got lucky ay?
  <NMO> Yeah, my subwoofer is such a fucking slut.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907435
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.718922
text:
  <FishNetGirl> guess what I haveeee....
  <KrackWhores> mountain dew?
  <FishNetGirl> mmhm, yup.
  <KrackWhores> well guess what I have
  <FishNetGirl> mountain dew?
  <KrackWhores> no
  <KrackWhores> a penis
  <FishNetGirl> i know
  <FishNetGirl> er...


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907435
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.718996
text:
  <RexExitium> "I miss you, Luke."
  <RexExitium> "I miss you too, Amidala."
  <Tenek> luke?
  <LordChaos-AFK> lol
  <Relnereth> Luke and amidala?
  <RexExitium> "I love you very much, Amidala. I cannot live
  without you. Not one second. Not one second."
  <Tenek> Anakin, Rex.
  <Sir_silver> HOO HA
  <Relnereth> incest!!
  <RexExitium> "I feel the same way about you, Anakin."
  <RexExitium> haha oops.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907435
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.719058
text:
  <Manda> i want a bf
  <Manda> i am lame and desperit
  <Jamie> desperate
  <Redalien> no
  <Redalien> desperit
  <Redalien> from the latin
  <Jamie> wtf
  <Redalien> deperitus
  <Redalien> meaning easy


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907436
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.719113
text:
  <Korvus> i found a message in a bottle today
  <Korvus> it floated past
  <D> what'd it say?
  <Korvus> it said: "can you put this in a bin for me please?"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907436
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.719174
text:
  <R0SS1> theres a new technology place in my city and i know a
  couple of dudes who are gonna steal some tv's from it...some
  sony 45inch flat panel hdtv plasma diplay tv's
  <R0SS1> seriously
  <R0SS1> i'm gonna get one for cheap ass fuck
  <R0SS1> as
  <R0SS1> lol
  <here4ever> lol
  <Bearxor> lol


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907436
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.719231
text:
  <teste_fly> "um yes, i'd like to withdraw from life please"
  <teste_fly> "will that be checking or savings?"
  <teste_fly> "hmm, i think i just want to cancel my account"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907438
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.719385
text:
  <Rjx> so guys
  <Rjx> i gotta get my computer to the USA somehow
  <Rjx> as cheap as possible
  <GerbilWrk> wrap it up in a condom and swallow it
  <Jimmothy> put it in a condom and swallow it
  <Rjx> you two aren't allowed to talk anymore


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907439
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.719431
text:
  <azonenberg> wordpress is an unauthenticated remote shell
  that, as a useful side feature, also contains a blog


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907439
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.719479
text:
  <kohupiimakook> how can u connect two computers
  <kohupiimakook> like lan, but without ethernet card
  <suksu> with glue maybe


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907439
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.719534
text:
  <TuxMan> beh you know what happened...
  <terminus> what?
  <TuxMan> i whacked off while watching the linux kernel
  compile...
  <TuxMan> i mean... uh...
  <terminus> o_O


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907440
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.719595
text:
  <spiteful> the one day rule is when i get to "chill" with you
  because it only takes a day for you to get a new guy...
  <S4L3M> you're such a lamer
  <S4L3M> could you tell your brother i can't come on wednesday?
  <spiteful> i could... *couch*onedayrule*cough*
  <S4L3M> or i could just call him instead and tell him myself
  and ignore that last little attempt at blackmail
  * S4L3M smacks you in the back of the head
  <S4L3M> *THUNK* idiot


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907440
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.719640
text:
  <^Tony_Soprano^> TommyT, we all knw that all girls on mirc are
  guys, all guys are guys, and little boys are FBI agents


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907440
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.719696
text:
  <voltstfu> :(
  <voltstfu> you suck :(
  <voltstfu> i hope you have a hernia that spills into your
  testicle sack
  <voltstfu> and then when they operate
  <voltstfu> and resituate the intestinal tract behind a screen
  of iron mesh in your abdomen
  <voltstfu> ...
  <voltstfu> fuck it, i think the hernia is bad enough


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907440
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.719738
text:
  sidacola: I wonder if the house would burn down if I set it on
  fire?
  sidacola: Er, I meant the incense stick, not the house.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907441
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.719810
text:
  <eqnox> I need ddr to unlease my full power
  <kingBooze> ddr?
  <eqnox> dance dance revolution
  <kingBooze> I've never played
  <kingBooze> is it as fun as everyone says it is?
  <bennid> no
  <bennid> just gay
  <DSmooth> kingBooze: ddr is for ghetto kids
  <DSmooth> at the arcade
  <DSmooth> and their white trash girlfirends watch them play
  <DSmooth> until they've had enough
  <DSmooth> then they take them home and beat them


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907441
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.719855
text:
  <[IX|BoW]WaCKy-Angel-[GP]> can some1 constantly mesg me in
  ICQ? coz my connection will only move if i receive icq mesg


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907441
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.719913
text:
  <Mike> ARGH SHIT
  <Mike> Ive been on the internet for ALMOST 3 HOURS
  <Mike> SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSHITE
  <Mike> BIG HUGE PHONE BILL
  <Mike> bye bye everyone
  *** Mike (~M@194.165.170.168) Quit (Quit: Mike is Gone, Nobody
  Noticed)
  <Jumper> heh
  <Jumper> "phone"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907441
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.719964
text:
  <Rjx> see i'm fully willing to honour "valentines day" as long
  as the female in question honours "naked nintendo day"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907442
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.720084
text:
  <cactoid> you love the Colonel
  <cactoid> I like KFC chippies
  <cactoid> and zinger burgers
  <cactoid> the rest tastes ok while you're eating it but it's
  just fucking gross greasy fried vermin
  <Bayls> Yeah, the chips are ace.
  <Bayls> The actual chicken pieces are shit.
  <Bayls> You may as well sculpt some lard into a shape the
  looks like a drumstick, then coat it with butter. Then roll it
  in lard, then melt fat onto it, then fry it in animal fat, dip
  it in lard then eat it.
  <Bayls> I think 10 out of the 11 secrec "herbs and spices" are
  "lard".
  <Bayls> Mmmm, making me hungry. Might go get a 21 piece
  bucket. :)
  *** Signoff: Bayls


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907442
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.720133
text:
  <NiceGuyEddie> "The miserly, large-nosed Gargamel is a blatant
  Jewish stereotype. Draw your own conclusions"
  <Alpha_Omega> PUT GARGAMEL IN THE OVEN THEN, GERMAN


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907443
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.720193
text:
  <jinkusu> nd-: you're not lagged
  <jinkusu> i'm just typing with one hand
  <nd-> ok, 'nuff said
  <nd-> enjoy
  <[dom]> is the other one hugging mr. wonderful?
  <jinkusu> yup


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907443
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.720242
text:
  (JazzSax) tim likes 8 year old girls
  (JazzSax) he looks sooooo big in their hands.
  (JazzSax) they like picture books
  (tiko) rhonda: Think of me more as a childhood educator.
  (dev-) um, I don't think sex ed lessons aren't supposed to be
  in the back of a white van


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907443
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.720293
text:
  <Bodom83> dir NEW KORN SLIPKNOT DVDS!!
  <Nvrmr> cd wrong window
  <Nvrmr> dir
  <Nvrmr> get dumbass.txt


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907443
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.720353
text:
  <spazzer> i've found out that the longer the muffler body is,
  the quieter the exhaust is
  <spicrx7> duh spazz
  <spicrx7> that's like saying...
  <spicrx7> i've found out that the fatter the girl is, the more
  she sweats"
  <TheDrip> the bigger my dick is, the more spic will scream
  when I stick it up the ass
  <TheDrip> up his ass rather


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907444
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.720408
text:
  <aNuBiS-> :/
  <natascam> hi annie, how is your chi today?
  <aNuBiS-> un-aligned
  <aNuBiS-> i yin, when i should of yang'd
  <natascam> did you try booze?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907444
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.720456
text:
  <ngn-18> thats wherrrre i wanna go... down to kokomo
  <dredg> that song reminds me of not wanting to be at summer
  camp.
  <dredg> AKA: wanting the camp counselor to let me put my pants
  back on and leave the storage room. :(


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.907445
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:05.720549
text:
  (@f00kaG0at) im still trying to figure out how to get to
  minesweeper
  (@f00kaG0at) in xp
  (@Yemen) :D
  (@f00kaG0at) goddamn new start menu
  (@Yemen) yeh
  (@Yemen) it confused me for a couple of days too
  (@f00kaG0at) ive had it 5 months
  (@Yemen) oh
  (@Yemen) ^_^


