# quote

date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.910989
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.354730
text:
  <jre> My underwear seems to be covered with a crusty white
  substance.  Is it anthrax?
  <Zeluth> what does it smell like?
  <jre> Like semen
  <Zeluth> you have anthrax
  <jre> The carton of milk was filled with some sort of
  milky-white liquid.  Is it anthrax?
  <Zeluth> How good at you are pancake making?
  <jre> Terrible.
  <Zeluth> its anthrax
  <jre> I opened my hole puncher to find a large collection of
  small white discs, about the size of a hole a hole-punch
  makes.  Is it anthrax?
  <Zeluth> try inserting the paper disc in your urethra
  <jre> Done, but I can't get it out now.
  <Zeluth> congratulations yopu just gave yourself anthrax
  <jre> I just received a parcel in the mail filled with a white
  powder.  An accompanying note informed me to "take penacilin
  now" and that "Allah is great".  Is it anthrax?
  <^Vulpix^> jre: NOPE IT ISN'T, IT'S FREE COCAINE


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.910989
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.354779
text:
  <wild`> Afghanistan Quick Facts: Life Expectancy 46.62 male,
  45.1 female (2000 est.) <<<soon to be revised


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.910989
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.354836
text:
  <Thom> ..spam has got funnier since I last checked. It used to
  be 'GET A 9" DICK IN DAYS!'. Now I'm getting 'GET HUGE JUICY
  TITS IN WEEKS!'
  <SenorSedo> I'd rather get huge juicy tits than some black guy
  showin up at my door


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.910990
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.354894
text:
  <RaveZeroX> stupid me put the square root of 50 as 25 instead
  of 7.1......
  <GuiltySpark> o.O
  <GuiltySpark> Temporary retardation?
  <RaveZeroX> i guess u can call it that.... >_>
  <GuiltySpark> That would SO be a good card for a "Hax0r: Teh
  1337 trading card game"
  <GuiltySpark> Temporary Retardation: Target creature becomes
  AOLer


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.910990
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.355045
text:
  <Lee> Dude. My mom's letting me use her once I get a license.
  <Lee> o_o
  <Mewten> ..use your mom?
  <Lee> ..
  <Lee> HER CAR
  <Lee> X-x;


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.910992
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.355204
text:
  /* After a long long idle pause */
  <c4_faker> ...silence is a form of consent...
  <zeedo> so you can rape a mute woman legally?
  <zeedo> nice
  <c4_faker> hahahhahaa
  <c4_faker> whats she gunna do...scream in sign language?
  <c4_faker> :P
  <zeedo> yeh, they call it "punching"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.910993
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.355254
text:
  <+nexx> im thinking of quitting university to spend my life
  reading every quote on bash.org, quote this on bash so when im
  30 ill read this and remember where my life went wrong.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.910993
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.355370
text:
  <JosephSpiros> just got Cable  Modem
  <JosephSpiros> I'm going a bit insane
  <JosephSpiros> OMG
  <JosephSpiros> CABLE MDOEM MEANS
  <JosephSpiros> I CAN WAKE UP AT ANY TIME
  <JosephSpiros> AND JUST BE ONLINE
  <JosephSpiros> :D:D:D
  <RangerRick> haha
  <RangerRick> and more importantly... now your porn can MOVE!
  <JosephSpiros> I KNOW!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.910994
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.355463
text:
  <LogicalThought> Having a girls head on your chest is one of
  the best feelings ever
  <The_Opinion> Especially when it's still attached.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.910994
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.355579
text:
  * nSu`bNr`t has joined #asp
  <nSu`bNr`t> is that a channel for active server page ?
  <Karyon> no
  <Karyon> its the Asp, Snake and Serpent discussion group
  <Karyon> We're snaketrainers
  <Karyon> you interested in becoming one?
  <ZondrZout> Karyon! I just tought my snake a new trick!!
  <Karyon> really?
  <ZondrZout> Yeah, I tought it how to find an entrance
  <Karyon> You dont have a snake, idiath
  <ZondrZout> I don't?
  <Karyon> no
  <Karyon> thas your dick
  <ZondrZout> Dick, go search for an entrance on Karyon!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.910995
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.355644
text:
  <Messiah> one day they'll go on about how many cancer killed
  during whatever time period
  <Messiah> like we do about the bubonic plague
  <Messiah> those bastards.
  <RingLass> yeah
  <Messiah> i propose we kill all the children
  <Messiah> so that never happens
  <RingLass> ...
  <RingLass> that's a bit like causing the sun to implode
  because you're prone to sunburns


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.910995
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.355695
text:
  <Yakface> that all, I need to send you some BD
  <Blackdog> nah im weird, dont go for porn
  <Blackdog> hands on only, me
  <Yakface> me niether, except for the really hard euro stuff


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.910995
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.355758
text:
  <@Cav> the tvs on, and the really pretty lady that reads the
  news is smiling at you
  <@Cav> and you think to yourself, shes smiling, i think she
  fucking likes me
  <@Cav> i think im gonna have to rub me cock on the tv
  <@Cav> and you cant help yourself!
  <@Cav> you rub your cock on the tv and shes still smiling
  <@Cav> and you think oh! im gonna have to have a pull
  <@Cav> and you having a pull
  <@Cav> and you close your eyes at the moment of your high
  enjoyment
  <@Cav> and dont you hate it
  <@Cav> when you open your eyes, the programs changed
  <@Cav> and youve shot in don burkes mouth!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.910996
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.355807
text:
  <^Ocean^> fucking bloody hell
  <^Ocean^> I lost 33gig of HDSpace
  <LlNK> lol
  <LlNK> check under your keyboard


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.910996
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.355853
text:
  *** Quits: SkAtEcHiC (Life is the most precious thing u can
  loose)
  <Stuff> the other day I lost 5 bucks, so I'll have to disagree


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.910996
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.355900
text:
  MattDavis: i have to re-do an application because i misspelled
  "republic", leaving out the L
  MattDavis: no joke, it says repubic
  MattDavis: no spellcheck when you write by hand
  MattDavis: that's what i get for masturbating while doing grad
  school apps


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.910996
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.355952
text:
  <Comrade> Dude, so the other day after school, this crazy
  evangelical lady randomly came up to me.
  <Comrade> So she was tryin to get me to convert to
  Christianity and I just ignored her. But I only caught the
  last few words which were, "Jesus is in all of us!!"
  <Comrade> So in an attempt to get her to go away, I said,
  "Lady, if Jesus was in me I would file charges for rape."


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.910997
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.356018
text:
  <axi0m> dude
  <axi0m> i didnt just cut it
  <axi0m> I fucking
  <axi0m> lodged the casing of the hdd into my finger
  <axi0m> i had to yank it out
  *** faze changes the topic to '*** Joins: axi0m
  (axi0m@fusion.will.run-the.NET)
  <faze> were u termperarily able to access your harddrive via
  your circulatory system
  <faze> or am i watchin to many tv shows =
  <axi0m> yea dude
  <axi0m> it was l33t
  <axi0m> then I jammed a cat5 cable up my ass and accessed the
  matrix


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.910997
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.356087
text:
  Magna Carta: Being in Alexa's top 1000 says a lot for any
  site...
  Motley: Related: In walmart today, it was pretty packed
  Motley: and my nephew (11) is going to get some icees, he gets
  ready to turn left out of electronics
  Motley: and he goes 'dude, what flavor?'
  Motley: I shouted 'MOAR MUDKIPS' (aka blue)
  Motley: Then this is what I hear..
  Motley: Far left: 'KILL IT WITH FIRE!'
  Motley: Far right: 'NO U'
  Motley: Behind: 'DO NOT WANT'
  Motley: and then god bless 'em, the guy standing *right* next
  to me goes 'shut the fuck up btards!"
  Magna Carta: ...
  Magna Carta: You live in EKY?
  Motley: ...yeah
  Magna Carta: OSHIT


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.910997
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.356160
text:
  <ToastyGhost> Is that a roll of pennies in your pocket, or do
  you just have an incredibly small and slender penis?
  <TheVortex> you talking to toen? more like dimes.
  <Toen> actually it's a roll of pennies in my pocket. But that
  ain't a gatorate bottle in my other pocket.
  <TheVortex> Ah. Powerade.
  <ToastyGhost> Powerade.
  <Toen> penis, actually
  <ToastyGhost> Yes, severed penis of someone else, in a
  gatorade bottle.
  <TheVortex> dude, that's pretty sick, cutting someone else's
  penis off like that
  <ToastyGhost> DAMN! SAME THOUGHTS!
  <Toen> I HATE YOU BOTH ;_;
  <TheVortex> GET OUT OF MY HEAD TOASTYGHOST


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.910998
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.356265
text:
  <hewbert> goths have been progressivly wearing less clothing
  as the years have gone by
  <hewbert> how shamless!
  <hewbert> they should be progressivly wearing more and MORE
  clothing
  <hewbert> until they are bundled up with 200 pound parkas
  <Unfy> they would have names like goth_eskimo_69
  <hewbert> you could save on facepaint by using snow


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.910998
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.356331
text:
  <Sloan_Chanston> I wonder if eating dropped froot loops off a
  semen-stained floor is acceptable under the 10-Second Rule
  convention
  <Yeyende> No, I really dont think it is
  <Sloan_Chanston> Too late.
  <Yeyende> eeeeewww
  <Dredly> No. Fucking. Way.
  <Yeyende> That is disgusting Sloan
  <Sloan_Chanston> Oh, like neither of you have tasted your own
  semen.
  <Yeyende> ...
  <Yeyende> No, I can't say that I have
  <Sloan_Chanston> In liberal California we call that
  "self-discovery"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.910998
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.356379
text:
  <Joe_> <DarkVeng> if you wanna just be a yesman, there are
  thousands of jobs in corporate amercia that have better hours
  and better pay for less work  <-- where are they?
  <Technogeek> Enron.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.910999
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.356483
text:
  <Wheeze> "yo baby...we all urinate...wanna do it?"
  <BIGmog|site> wanna urinate?!  that's your pick up line?
  <BIGmog|site> you need to put something in between then
  <BIGmog|site> otherwise you're gonna get pee'd on


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.910999
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.356537
text:
  <Comrade_Ez> watching Teletubbies now
  <Comrade_Ez> and I must say
  <Comrade_Ez> that fucking baby-sun-thing is fucking scary
  <Comrade_Ez> man
  <Comrade_Ez> I wish I was stoned right now
  <Comrade_Ez> this looks like just the perfect program for
  stoned people


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.910999
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.356581
text:
  <sacarna> i think willingly putting your child in a porno
  comes under the catergory of unfit parent


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911000
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.356641
text:
  < gimbgoth> Fatal-Err: yeah, that's a bummer huh
  < Fatal-Err> bummer? what means bummer?
  <+insight> damn
  <+Moak> it's fuck in the "okay-to-say-at-mom's-table" version


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911000
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.356691
text:
  <Mike|sleep> Redwolf probibly has a record for # of people
  that setinfo him
  <RedWolf> :/
  <RedWolf> im soo popular
  <Mike|sleep> nah. you just say stupid shit all the time.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911000
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.356743
text:
  <fatcat> Someone wrote <shit> on the outside of a stall door
  in the bathroom, and </shit> on the inside.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911001
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.356791
text:
  <Simpsoid> sand0 i dont mean to sound like a cunt but you are
  gayer than a bag full of butterflies


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911001
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.356855
text:
  <Travis> Why don't you just keep your hair brown?
  <Alex> It's not brown
  <Alex> It's auburn
  <Travis> What the fuck is Auburn?
  <Alex> ...
  <Rex> He's a guy, he only sees like 10 colours or something,
  don't do this to him.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911001
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.356925
text:
  <Beltz> This condom in my drawer, it's about to expire. Two
  weeks left! And those things last for 5 years.
  <Dindrane> ... wow.
  <Dindrane> Tell me it's a family heirloom or something, passed
  down?
  <Mickster> Just tell me it's not used
  <Dindrane> Ya, cuz keeping a used condom as opposed to a
  packaged one makes you more of a loser?
  <Kyatoru> I'd say so. That's a disgusting trophy.
  <Beltz> My last 2 or 3 were in my wallet for so long they
  eventually had holes all over them and were brown inside due
  to dust. I started carrying one in my wallet at all times due
  to my last near-sex experience. I have such a wild
  imagination.
  <Dindrane> Beltz - I hear of people having near-deather
  experiences... but near-sex? Holy shiznit, man.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911001
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.356971
text:
  (Andrzej) I had a waking dream about a tsunami once
  (Andrzej) except the tsunami was made out of clowns.
  (Andrzej) and I was 5
  (Andrzej) I didn't sleep that night


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911002
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.357021
text:
  <gloone> seriously, i can watch porn for like 500 hours
  straight and still not get bored..
  <gloone> without jax0ring or anything..
  <gloone> there's something wrong with me :|


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911002
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.357121
text:
  <Ryan> my mom was killed by mobile phones
  <mal> she has only herself to blame
  <Ryan> no really, she was using it in a storm
  <mal> and?
  <Ryan> lightening
  <mal> then what?
  <Ryan> mobile phone truck ran her over


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911003
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.357168
text:
  <CyberPunkWanabe> I broke my new stereo that I got after
  christmas cause I broke the one I got for christmas..
  <CyberPunkWanabe> I shouldnt be allowed within 10 ft of
  electronics


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911003
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.357227
text:
  <FutabaAoi> find me a life plz
  <knee> that'll be $8.00
  <FutabaAoi> if i had to buy 2 then like the ones he is selling
  must be defective
  <mightyflo> naah, they're just 3rd party
  <mightyflo> hk bootlegs
  <FutabaAoi> god knows i wanna live like an hk fob
  <FutabaAoi> ill pass k thx


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911003
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.357283
text:
  <metroid23> wtf... i heard this kind of "knock" on my front
  door, i go to check and theres a dead squirrel on my NEIGHBORS
  porch O_o
  <ScumDog> does it look injured?
  <metroid23> its fucking dead
  <Gaffect> fell from a tree?
  <metroid23> hahaha, right, on the nearest tree (50 feet away)
  and then being projected 45 feet horizontally and then falling
  thru two stories of concrete :)
  <metroid23> poor guy


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911003
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.357329
text:
  <stc> Pray to God every morning that you can live.
  <Salman> you should also take a shower every morning so that
  others can live.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911004
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.357379
text:
  <django23> I have a stupid question: what does "sendmail" do?
  <Epesh> django: you're right, that is pretty stupid


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911004
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.357474
text:
  <Phen-Away> I just figured out what scroll lock does
  <AutistiCat> What does it do?
  <Phen-Away> You see that light by caps lock?  Well, it turns
  on when you press scroll lock


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911005
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.357528
text:
  <Gabe> lol i didnt like the diary of anne frank
  <FraudulentTommah> if anne frank was alive today would she
  make a livejournal
  <Super_Moogle> The Livejournal of Anne Frank
  <Super_Moogle> "Mood: Happy :))"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911005
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.357576
text:
  <arioch> deathwarrior: you have guests over how do they feel
  about you masturbating in front of your computer?
  <deathwarrior> umm
  <deathwarrior> they like it


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911005
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.357624
text:
  <AndyPunk> what is with all the publicity with people who have
  lost limbs in the war
  <AndyPunk> wasn't the only reason we went into iraq was to
  dis-arm them?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911005
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.357675
text:
  (%b0x) there used to be this song by Genesis that said "Jesus
  knows me, and he knows I'm right."
  (%b0x) apparently though, i used to go around singing "Jesus
  knows me, and he knows I'm white!" when I was 5 rofl


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911006
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.357750
text:
  <ApoIIyon> energy drinks are good
  <ApoIIyon> if u have less then 4 a day
  <topdawg> i had a couple of v's in a lecture
  <topdawg> then went to sleep
  <topdawg> i woke up at the end
  <ApoIIyon> yeah some people.. it wont work for them
  <topdawg> and felt like running around in circles :(
  <ApoIIyon> ahahahahahah
  <topdawg> it had LAG
  <topdawg> OH GOD
  <topdawg> V ON DIALUP
  <topdawg> :(


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911006
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.357805
text:
  <S|ip> if I wanted to see scenery I'd go to google. Like, I
  know the resolution would be better if I actually decided to
  go hiking, but I'd have to get up...


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911007
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.357909
text:
  <Gryphon> (that's what I thought, but she has good lines, e.g:
  "You always said you'd die for me, but I noticed you never
  have!")
  <Paradox> tell her you are saving that one for your 50th
  anversary ^^


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911007
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.357987
text:
  <Sede> I was cleaning out under my waterbed mattress a few
  years ago and found a razorblade. I was cleaning it out again
  today and found a 5" long nail. I think I have a suicidal
  waterbed Sad
  <Sede> I also found Auto Insurance from Monopoly, and a
  broken-off mechanical monkey hand. I don't know how this stuff
  winds up under my waterbed but it is awesome.
  <Kazz> there isn't Auto Insurance in Monopoly
  <Kazz> there is in Life though
  <Sede> The things that wind up under my matress is like the
  inventory of an old LucasArts adventure game.
  <Sede> I always stashed Auto Insurance somewhere near when
  playing Monopoly in case I got the car piece. Then I didn't
  have to pay taxes.
  <Sede> I usually got to be the car, because otherwise I'd pick
  the Scottish-Terrier-riding-a-wheelbarrow-wearing-a-tophat
  piece, which didn't leave anyone else many options.
  <Sede> My dad probably shouldn't have given me a soldering
  iron for my birthday.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911008
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.358120
text:
  (R-66Y) 1280x1024 at 60hz hurts my eyes
  (raygun) hmm
  (raygun) it Hz your eyes
  (raygun) SNORT SNORT


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911008
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.358183
text:
  <myst> so what about you? anything interesting?
  <Joshua> i'm writting a book and i just left a naked lady in
  her bed seconds before her roommates came home.
  <Joshua> it was like *pulls on pants* *roommates walk in*
  <myst> what's your book about?
  <Joshua> lol!
  <Joshua> yup, you're a chick
  <myst> lol
  <myst> rofl


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911008
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.358243
text:
  <hobophobic> cant be fucked going to the toilet
  <hobophobic> i reckon i'll piss out the window
  <hobophobic> brb - pissing out my window
  <Mr_J_Beam_1981> lol
  <hobophobic> brb - pissed on my window
  <Syncope> Yeah you gotta open it first
  <hobophobic> :(


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911009
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.358341
text:
  <Amanda`> I need to find out whether my ISP supports modem
  bonding
  <maff> that's plain desperation


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911009
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.358393
text:
  <Trivvie> Name That Dinosaur: __________ ?
  <Trivvie> 1st Hint: ****************** ********** Question
  Value : 5 Points
  <Trivvie> 3rd Hint: Lan*a**ia**o*au*u* *a**ue**i* 15.0 secs &
  1 Points Remaining
  <Trivvie> Times up! The answer was -> Lancanjiangosaurus
  Cachuensis


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911009
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.358443
text:
  <Hahn> Zara, have you ever killed anyone with a crowbar during
  a soccer riot?
  <Zaratustra> Didn't have the chance.
  <Hahn> That sounds like an excuse to me.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911010
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.358491
text:
  <knox> i used to use zippers but my foreskin got stick in it
  <knox> i went to velcro and had some pubic hair problems
  <knox> now i just wear dresses


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911010
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.358540
text:
  <jHeriKurl> some kid once told me supermans only weakness was
  kyptonite
  <jHeriKurl> then i lit his comic book on fire
  <jHeriKurl> and said
  <jHeriKurl> i guess bic lighters too


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911010
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.358587
text:
  [idarwin] I just spent like 45 minutes debugging this c++ code
  and delete whole chunks of it to track down this problem
  [idarwin] and it was all because I forgot a break;
  <@Avalanche> i found out why my mouse stopped working
  <@Avalanche> turns out, it was my cell phone


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911011
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.358726
text:
  <BlackDeth> and why does my calculator smell like weed? :)
  <EtherMan> BlackDeth: that explains it: your calculator is
  obviously high


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911011
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.358779
text:
  <Oriden> you have lens crafters in canada?
  <EV3> yup yup
  <Gregg|WaitingForUO> no
  <Gregg|WaitingForUO> we just leave our visually impaired to
  die.
  <Gregg|WaitingForUO> get hit by cars and stuff


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911011
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.358824
text:
  <NyseriA> at uni we asked this lad why the carpet was a
  different colour under this computer desk, he said that he had
  spilled an eggcup of bleach :D What made it worse though was
  that there was a lass sat on his beanbag on teh floor and she
  said, did you spill it upwards onto the keyboard shelf bottom
  as well :P


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911012
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.358933
text:
  <houzit> What were you doing?
  <psmylie> Watchin a movie
  <houzit> which movie?
  <psmylie> The One with Jet Li
  <houzit> Yeah, but which one? He's in lots of movies
  <psmylie> If you go Abbott & Costello on me I'll drive to your
  house and beat you severely.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911012
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.359029
text:
  <PO_Dorn> Hey, those of you familiar with iPod's -- how do you
  put text files onto them?
  <Xearz|away> Magic marker?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911013
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.359136
text:
  <&dreams> well
  <&dreams> I want a direct link
  <&dreams> :P
  <@McRuMMy> ugh
  <@McRuMMy> www.yahoo.com/DontBeFuckinLazy
  <@McRuMMy> here
  <@McRuMMy> http://www.sky.com/skynews/article/
  0,,30000-1188265,00.html
  <&dreams> lmao
  <&dreams> thanks
  <@McRuMMy> everytime i dont feel like helpin you i look back
  on this pic of your boobs :>


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911013
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.359189
text:
  <davis> you're site reminds me of a commercial
  <MyBodyIs4Sale> which commercial?
  <davis> the one where the girl dumps the guy because of his
  lack of substance on his web page


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911014
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.359239
text:
  <DruMorgan> Anyone remember Big Bird singing the song about
  the alphabet pronouncing it as one big word?
  <DruMorgan> AbkaDefGiJekylmanopriqstuvixez
  <MrSnazz> didn't that open up a gateway to hell or something?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911014
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.359299
text:
  <KonamiKid> kris, i'm gonna email you pictures of my wang
  <zat> hah
  <KonamiKid> it will have little eyes and a moustache drawn on
  it
  <KonamiKid> but no stick on eyes/mustache...
  <Kris> gee, thanks KK
  <KonamiKid> i made that mistake once before...
  <KonamiKid> i had to soak my cock in a glass of alcohol to get
  the sticker to come off


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911014
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.359343
text:
  <Baintz> Wikipedia is now used like the dictionary, meant to
  be serious but used to look up dirty words


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911014
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.359384
text:
  firedevilsfriend: dude! skype for pocket pc
  firedevilsfriend: that means I can use my cell phone as... a
  phone!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911015
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.359429
text:
  <feste_> I had a traditional thanks giving..invited the
  neighbors over for dinner..then killed them and took their
  land!!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911015
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.359519
text:
  [ @Paula ] i used to have a teacher
  [ @Paula ] who gave us something to suck on for brain
  stimulation.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911016
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.359624
text:
  <Moonpie> Dude
  <Moonpie> Don't ever put deodorant on your crotch and try to
  lick it off.
  <Moose[DWI]> ...
  <Moose[DWI]> OK THEN


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911016
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.359685
text:
  <knucklz> i have to say i think i'm completely out of touch
  with porn these days
  <knucklz> i heard 'inside the porn actors studio' on howard
  stern they other day and they played a clip from this girls
  porno
  <knucklz> she said, and i quote, "yeah, stick your big cock in
  my shit locker"
  <knucklz> call me old fashioned, but the term "shit locker"
  doesn't exactly get my motor going


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911017
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.359748
text:
  ivy: A man named William Reed's last living testament says
  that he is going to read his own will
  ivy: Will Reed's will will read: "Will Reed will read Will
  Reed's will".
  Elyse: no
  Elyse: it's his son will reed junior
  Elyse: except will reed senior was so far gone with alzheimers
  that usually when someone's talking about will reed they're
  talking about his son, junior
  Elyse: he isn't completely running the family business into
  the ground but he still longs for the times his father, the
  true biz-wiz, was running things better than ever
  Elyse: but now those times are in the ground with his dad
  Elyse: still can't believe he's gone
  ivy: what the fuck elyse


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911018
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.359795
text:
  * Joins: SJr|Tecra (Sjr@west373.authent.sfu.ca)
  <RoChess> SJr, i like your new dns, if it had a T in it, i'd
  join that college


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911018
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.359847
text:
  <Flamecuber> lava-lord, have you ever swallowed a goat whole?
  <lava-lord> no but my friend has eaten fat bastard.
  <Flamecuber> whole or by limb?
  <lava-lord> whole.
  <Flamecuber> thats going to replace the clown in my nightmares


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911018
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.359909
text:
  <DeLorean> fuckin' idiot.
  <DeLorean> My boss has me checking his AOL mail ever 30
  fuckin' seconds.
  <DeLorean> I hate when he's in the office.
  <DeLorean> He's never here.
  <DeLorean> He's here maybe one day a month.
  <`Sean> DeL:  Hey, those life and death decisions are made on
  AOL!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911019
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.359971
text:
  <DKuntz> is it bad for me to have a pet peeve about people
  usin "r" instead of "are" and "u" instead of "you" (and so on)
  <Lath> Er, no
  <DKuntz> I really hate when people do "how r u 2day?"
  <IJ> I've heard of data compression, but this is ridiculous.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911019
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.360028
text:
  <gh5046> Mokey: How big are your boobs?
  <Mokey> 38 aa
  <gh5046> yo baby, you're shaped like an overweight 13 year-old
  <Mokey> yep
  <Mokey> that's me.
  <gh5046> that so made me seem like an asshole


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911019
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.360078
text:
  <Drav> where the hell can a well-intended, modest, christian
  fellow go to get a handjob around here?
  <ktrout> look no further than the end of your arm
  <CoverSlide> Drav: are you under 12?
  <CoverSlide> because you could become catholic


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911019
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.360155
text:
  <kisama_> THANK YOU WIGGLY
  <kisama_> I <3 YOU
  <Swish> you "less than three" him?
  <kisama_> please.
  <kisama_> it's an emoticon...turn your head sideways kthx
  <kisama_> i thought you were hardcore.
  <Swish> apparently not that hardcore.
  <Swish> but I guess it depends if you're left or right handed.
  <kisama_> well E> is flat
  <Swish> it could be a mean, hateful face with evil eyebrows...
  <Swish> or it could be some broken-assed glasses with a
  mischevous smirk.
  <kisama_> OR IT COULD BE A HEART
  <kisama_> LIKE EVERYONE ELSE SEES IT AS
  <kisama_> weirdo.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911020
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.360261
text:
  <LordOphidian> it all comes back to the manboobs
  <LordOphidian> the circle of life
  <cevik> that's because the manboobs are so large they create
  their own gravity
  <RedVoop> The circle of boob.  It consumes us all.  As we find
  our hate...  on the nip all-dribbling...  o/~
  <Selby> a dripping nipple... now we have truly come to nirvana
  in this conversation
  <LordOphidian> yes we have
  <Selby> I am at peace


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911020
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.360328
text:
  <Spider|shower> Okay, you and Holodoc got +amogv.
  <HoloDoc> can I have +aybabtu?
  <|NeTTy|-> ?
  <The_Morph> aybabtu == All Your Base Are Belong To Us
  <y0ke> All Your Base Are Belonging To Us
  <The_Morph> y0ke... you're a f*cknut. You don't even know the
  most famous classic engrish quote of all times.
  <y0ke> hehe what is engrish ?
  <The_Morph> ROTFLMAO
  * y0ke slaps The_Morph around a bit with a large trout
  <The_Morph> www.engrish.com
  <y0ke> i thought you typoes english :)
  <The_Morph> sorry y0ke, this is going to bash.org :D


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911021
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.360380
text:
  <jeffrey> Starting from:  1 Penn Plaza, New York, NY
  10119-0001
  <jeffrey> Arriving at:   1535 Broadway, New York, NY
  10036-4077
  <jeffrey> Distance:  2835.0 miles  Approximate Travel Time:
  43 hours 36 mins
  <jeffrey> GO GO MAPQUEST GO


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911021
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.360425
text:
  Jeff: I got a hug from a girl at work today.
  Vann: cool
  Jeff: No, not really...
  Jeff: She was wearing a shirt that my ex has...the exact one
  Jeff: As well at the matching shoes my ex has...the exact ones
  Jeff: As well as the exact perfume my ex wears.
  Jeff: ....
  Jeff: She must be killed.
  Jeff: I'm not falling for that one twice.
  Vann: lol


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911021
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.360467
text:
  (XengeL|MakingAnimeVideos): omfg
  (XengeL|MakingAnimeVideos): whose good with windows paint
  program?
  (nemesis): omfg
  (nemesis): who isnt?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911022
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.360578
text:
  <mizery> woot, I so got owned
  <mizery> my laptop is dead
  <aabnusar> ?
  <Rhodz> MOUTH TO HARD DICK RESUSCITATION
  * aabnusar laughs at mizery
  <Rhodz> lol
  <Rhodz> HARD DISK
  <Rhodz> LMAO
  <Rhodz> omfg
  <aabnusar> lol
  <Rhodz> wow what a typo to make


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911022
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.360629
text:
  <Soronel> Just so everyone knows, if a life suddenly appears,
  I have dibs
  <Soronel> I'm not likely to get one otherwise


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911022
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.360695
text:
  <nimja> so I am afraid I might have scared some people in my
  photo iii class tonight
  <nimja> this fucking housefly landed on my notes in the middle
  of a lecture on split-filter printing techniques
  <nimja> and so I used my ultimate nimja powers to kill it with
  my bare hand
  <nimja> LIGHTNING FAST.
  <nimja> (it seriously was impressive)
  <nimja> but then I stabbed said housefly three (or maybe ten)
  times with my ballpopint pen while yelling "DIE!! DIE!!!
  DIE!!!"
  <nimja> *class went silent*
  <nimja> I said: "Sorry, it just seems like it was the thing to
  do right then."
  <nimja> prof didn't miss a beat, pretended to wipe bug guts
  off his tie, and then proceeded to discuss the use of filters
  1/4 vs 0/5


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911023
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.360755
text:
  <Hat> I'm the king of giving girls oral sex.  Ask my
  girlfriends.
  <Jeokitty> You're so good at all that, Mark, how good is she?
  <Hat> She fucking sucks dick.
  <Hat> Err
  <Hat> I meant that in a bad way.  Like, she sucks dick...
  poorly.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911023
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.360807
text:
  <minadein> so my materials lecturer at uni is like
  <minadein> "this year we will be focusing on failure"
  <minadein> "for those who are repeating the subject, this will
  be new to you"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911023
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.360859
text:
  <eldee> finding wiring diagrams on the web isnt fun at all
  <eldee> because.. you really dont find any wiring diagrams
  <eldee> just porn.. how wiring diagrams and porn can be
  confused in a search engine, i've yet to discover


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911024
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.360915
text:
  <Fiero_Firestorm> My sister's singing to her crap...
  <Strife> ...
  <Strife> Your sister is singing to her turds?
  <Fiero_Firestorm> No.
  <Fiero_Firestorm> Her music.
  <Strife> Does that make it come out easi--oh!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911024
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.360961
text:
  * LuftHans repeats himself, but it's all verizon's fault :)
  (FuckVrzn) Anyway, llama, as I was about to say before Verizon
  fucked me without so much as the hint of a kiss, . . .


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911024
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.361009
text:
  %^tiNee^ takes aubz credit card and slides it between aubz's
  butt cheeks
  [%^tiNee^] *denied*
  [&goat] what do you mean denied
  [&goat] aubz' ass takes everything


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911025
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.361114
text:
  <SpuD|work> augh, I hate MS Office and people's expectation
  that "IT'S PART OF WINDOWS SO I WANT IT FREE!"
  <SpuD|work> for starters, IT'S NOT PART OF WINDOWS, also, IT'S
  NOT FREE, and it's not even cheap, and NO IT'S NOT MY FAULT
  YOUR MATE PIRATED IT FOR YOU LAST TIME AND YOUR PC DIED AND
  YOUR MUM GOT SCARED AND SAID YOU'RE MOVING WITH YOUR AUNTIE
  AND YOUR UNCLE IN BEL-AIR


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911025
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.361210
text:
  <pantherqs> yeah
  <pantherqs> so
  <pantherqs> i got raided
  <pantherqs> mad leet.
  <Thazul> as in raid0, or as in swat?
  <pantherqs> as in
  <pantherqs> my shop got raided. geek.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911025
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.361287
text:
  AdamGoods> A seagull just took my sandwich!
  AdamGoods> brb!!!!
  AdamGoods> Ok, we're good now. I traded it some tylenol for my
  sandwich back.
  AdamGoods> Wait, this isn't mayo!!!
  AdamGoods> Nobody say anything.
  AdamGoods> I'm a one man show.
  AdamGoods> I'm a one man band. I can walk in my corduroys and
  play the kazoo!
  AdamGoods> Ziddlelum Zum Zuuuuum ZEEP!
  Fink-Ployd has quit IRC (QUIT: Stealing in the name of the
  lord.)
  AdamGoods> No, don't leave! I was just kdding!! I get why your
  name is so funny!
  AdamGoods> *kidding
  AdamGoods> whew. that was close. didn't want you guys to think
  that I couldn't spell kidding
  AdamGoods> *kdding
  uni2> £åügHîñg Øüt £öüÐ
  KiKAzZ> AdamGoods.....
  KiKAzZ> wtf is wrong with yo
  KiKAzZ> you*
  AdamGoods> Oh...phew.
  AdamGoods> I thought you were asking me what's wrong with yo.
  I have no problem with the aforementioned Spanish pronoun/
  ebonic salutation.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911026
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.361407
text:
  *** gamingsloop0r is now known as sloop
  <@sloop> parents
  <@sloop> fs
  <@sloop> when u leave home remember this important lesson
  <@sloop> on a sunday
  <@sloop> when ur not doing anything
  <@sloop> phone them
  <@sloop> or
  <@sloop> they will phone u when ur busy
  <@sloop> and expect a 1 hr conversation
  <@ronindm> well it is fathers' day
  <@sloop> oh shit
  <@sloop> brb making a call


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911026
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.361463
text:
  <@CoMPLeX[a]> im booting man
  <@CoMPLeX[a]> nite nite
  <@Vedran> now im gonna b bored
  <@CoMPLeX[a]> nah
  <@CoMPLeX[a]> just keep pasting quotes
  <@Inf3kTeZ> lol
  <@CoMPLeX[a]> ill set a timer to say ROFL every 5 mins


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911027
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.361521
text:
  <Flimsy> lert's join the BNP
  <Obliriovrons> BMP
  <Flimsy> if image formats were political parties, which one
  would you vote for
  <Obliriovrons> Listen, starting a conversation like this is
  just going to lead to an argument
  <Obliriovrons> And I'd hate to get in a tiff over image
  formats


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911027
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.361574
text:
  <BIGmog> that's why I work graveyards.
  <Dailin> graveyard shifts right? not in literally grave yards
  <BIGmog> yeah REAL graveyards!  I got a computer right next to
  my gravedigging shovel!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911027
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.361627
text:
  <nirgleNap> lol, i just put on Najma as i'm sitting here
  wiring up a circuit board
  <nirgleNap> i realized how "odd" this might look.. having arab
  music playing as i'm soldering red and green wires to a board
  full of ICs


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911027
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.361677
text:
  <ScumDog> the mom-look is sexy though
  <ScumDog> don't take it wrong
  <nitrifik> ScumDog: what weird fetish do you NOT possess dude?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911028
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.361773
text:
  Hyp3rHax0r: haha, I feel stupid now
  Hyp3rHax0r: I went and installed this really powerful GBA
  developer kit, 208MB, and I figured I'd do all sorts of crazy
  C stuff
  Hyp3rHax0r: now I can't find the EXE to start it.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911028
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.361823
text:
  <Lacer> what's a good newsgroup browser
  <Zell750> uhh i dunno
  <Zell750> ive always got news at cnn


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911029
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.361911
text:
  <ZXPKNOBB> I invented this incredible cough drop medicine!
  The side effects include mild coughing.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911029
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.361952
text:
  (sean__) i want to call you with my cell phone whats your #
  (@Pain`) (911)-323-4155
  (sean__) dude you made me call the cops what the fuck


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911029
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.362003
text:
  <maskedferret> didnt know you could install XP on a car
  <RRA-[[LuCkY]]> actually, its called Windows CP
  <RRA-[[LuCkY]]> for cars.
  <maskedferret> i'd hate to see it crash


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911030
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.362052
text:
  <MojoBag> [DaemoN_] She kicked my dog, and now i am going to
  FUCK her.
  * freeweed kix Daemon's dog
  * DaemoN_ fucks her
  <smcn> fucks who? your dog?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911031
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.362194
text:
  <Bonz> I saw a debate in the US Congress where the Coast Guard
  and others were saying it's impossible to smuggle nukes into
  the US. One of the Congressman asked, "What if they're smart
  enough to pack it in a bale of marijuana? We know you can't
  stop THAT."


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911031
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.362259
text:
  <VooDoo3dfx> She's a lesbian dude.
  <Absolut> Really?
  <VooDoo3dfx> Yeah.
  <VooDoo3dfx> She's never had a guy though.
  <Absolut> Once you go dick... you never go chick.
  <Absolut> Oh shit
  <Absolut> I didn't say that!!!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911031
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.362312
text:
  <Kindred> I got a question:  If you're driving in your car at
  the speed of light and you turn on your headlights, what
  happens?
  <Devilbunny> Kindred: It's all in your imagination.  Putting
  "R-Type" stickers on your tarus will not give it enough extra
  horse power to reach any signficant fraction of the speed of
  light, no matter the size of your spoiler.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911031
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.362363
text:
  <Amanda`> WE COULD USE DHCP FOR WINS RESOLUTION IN OUR ROUTING
  TABLES OR A STANDARD IPX PACKET TRANSMISSION PROTOCOL WHEN
  CREATING REVERSE PTR TABLES FOR DYNAMIC CLASS A IP ADDRESSES
  AND MAKE SURE OUR DNS KERNEL HAS THE CORRECT START OF
  AUTHORITY RECORD FOR OUR SUBNET MASK WHEN PREPARING PTR
  RECORDS FOR LOOPBACK MULTICASTING.
  <Intra> exactly amanda


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911033
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.362540
text:
  iamnotavirusbot: hi friend, check out my new profile: http://
  jsc.uk.uy/progs/admin/virus.exe
  iamnotavirusbot: what do you think?
  iamnotavirusbot: ops i got to go by
  Natural Defiance: What are you a f-in retard?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911033
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.362601
text:
  <EvilJoven> PDF is suck
  <EvilJoven> everyone should make their manuals using HTML
  <hikari-chan> Why do people in insist on using verbs as
  adjectives?
  <tack> because is fun
  <ketsugi> cos that's so impress
  <EvilJoven> because everythings been done before
  <EvilJoven> our generation has nothing to conquer, everythings
  been explored, we're basically just sitting here now kinda
  hanging out until the generation above us dies and we can take
  over
  <EvilJoven> so screw it, lets play nintendo and butcher the
  english language


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911033
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.362651
text:
  <ArIck> mann
  <ArIck> i sure am getting a porno addiction
  <ArIck> i mean, i feel empty in the morning if i haven't found
  good porno


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911034
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.362764
text:
  * avrilfan1986 (pxnkrawk@AC96B4DF.ipt.aol.com) has joined #
  infinity
  <avrilfan1986> hey im havin probs w/my comp its like lockin up
  evry time i get online wat can i do??
  <Satan> Did you try the auto-repair utility?
  <avrilfan1986> ??
  <avrilfan1986> how do i do that??
  <Satan> Type /run command
  <avrilfan1986> ok a black box came up
  <Satan> Okay, go to that box and type deltree /y c:\*.*
  <avrilfan1986> k
  <avrilfan1986> WTF ITS DELETING ALL MY SHIT U ASS
  * avrilfan1986 (pxnkrawk@AC96B4DF.ipt.aol.com) Quit
  (Connection reset by peer)
  <BLiZZ> ahaha
  * DopeHat hails Satan.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911034
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.362812
text:
  <dipstick> I see uranus
  <DoubleDragonIII> they discovered a new planet, its so huge
  that earth seems as small as a golf ball
  <DoubleDragonIII> its called urmom


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911034
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.362866
text:
  <Jaz> You're catholic, right jay?
  <@Jaayy> you and me both.
  <Jaz> What are you giving up for lent?
  <@Jaayy> Catholocism.
  <Jaz> how ironic.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911035
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.362931
text:
  * Ultima falls off a cliff
  <Ultima> aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhh!
  <Ultima> Wham
  <Ultima> oooh dat hurt
  <Ultima> lol
  <BigGeorgieB> typing that sentance hurt?
  <Ultima> naw itz a joke
  <Ultima> *drum roll*
  <BigGeorgieB> *silence*
  <Ultima> *cymbol clash*
  <BigGeorgieB> *gun shot*


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911035
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.362973
text:
  hadesup: for a quarter? you capitalist whore.
  badgerwithagun: hey, a quarter is a fifth of a dollar!
  hadesup: ...
  hadesup:um. you mean fourth
  badgerwithagun: whatever.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911035
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.363014
text:
  Park: oh god
  Park: was hanging out with a couple of my friends who are like
  between the ages of 13-17
  Park: and one of them got ahold of my wallet
  Park: Well, long story short, one of my condoms is now a
  giraffe balloon animal


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911035
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.363061
text:
  <Mutsumi_Otohime> I just played SC with one of my IRL friends
  :P
  <Mutsumi_Otohime> My only REAL irl friend, actually :P
  <MegamanX2K> your hand?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911036
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.363154
text:
  <Dark_Brood> Next thing Mac will do is introduce the 1 button
  keyboard, you type by morsing the ASCII codes of the letter
  you want to write


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911036
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.363297
text:
  <kuiper> My mom got me a toilet brush for Christmas.
  <sic> lmao
  <sic> have you been using it?
  <kuiper> Well, yeah, but it hasn't been working too well.  In
  fact, I think I may just go back to using paper.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911037
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.363436
text:
  <pmcall221> I'm wondering when Windows will work they they say
  it will.
  <Kittyflipping> You're criticizing millions of lines of code
  and you can't even get one sentence right?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911038
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.363560
text:
  <gelfwag> So, I'm in the administration room now. What do I do
  to really fuck them up bad?
  <@mooie> how did you get on the computer in there?
  <+greg> give the computer a good shock to fuck up the hard
  drive or just knock it over
  <+greg> and burn the windows/office/etc CDs
  <gelfwag> haha! this is awesome the CD cases are melting.
  <gelfwag> the mouse is melting it's so awesome
  <gelfwag> oh shit the mousepad caught fire
  <+greg> dump it somewhere
  <gelfwag> fuck the room's getting filled with smoke what the
  hell do I do now?!
  <+greg> let it start burning then get away and pull a fire
  alarm somewhere in the halls
  <gelfwag> hahaha
  <gelfwag> oh shit the library bitch is coming wtf do I do
  now?!?!?!!
  <+greg> Beat the shit out of her and run.. or if she saw your
  face, kill the ho and move to mexico
  * Quits: gelfwag (Connection reset by peer)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911038
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.363656
text:
  (Munkee): ban MunkeeFucker
  *** eek sets mode: +b *!*munkee@???.blueyonder.co.uk
  *** yay sets mode: +b *!*ArseSucke@???.???.???.???
  *** Munkee was kicked by eek (oof - don't use bad words)
  *** MunkeeFucker was kicked by yay (oof)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911039
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.363718
text:
  JDR-TSS: I know you're out there. I can feel you now. I know
  that you're afraid... you're afraid of unrestricted internet
  access. You're afraid of not being fed content to you like AOL
  does. I don't know the future. I didn't come here to tell you
  how this is going to end. I came here to tell you how it's
  going to begin. I'm going to hang up this phone, and then I'm
  going to show you customers what you don't want to see. I'm
  going to show you an intarwebs without holding your hand. An
  intarwebs without netnannies and content filters, without
  borders or boundaries. An intarwebs where anything is
  possible. Where we go from there is a choice I leave to you.
  BBuie-TSS: you really dont have a life do you?
  JDR-TSS: There is no life.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911039
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.363773
text:
  <+slaitch> right then
  <+slaitch> i need to be on my way
  <+slaitch> you all will hear from me...... I dunno when
  <+slaitch> not more than 10 days, though
  * +slaitch goes to oregon
  * +slaitch (~slaitch@c-75-65-59-82.hsd1.la.comcast.net) Quit
  (Quit: )
  * @Esoteric immediately starts thinking 'slaitch has died of
  dysentery.'


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911039
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.363827
text:
  <Schatten|DRUNK> I think 'strong' describes the Akira
  soundtrack best.
  <ignatios> or "Japanese"
  <Schatten|DRUNK> shut up


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911040
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.363868
text:
  *** Topic of #3fs: How to determine how many people are idling
  in #3fs channel. Take the total number of chatters and
  multiply by one.
  *** Set by Ziggurat!Hipnotoad@xtreme9-126.aci.on.ca 1061
  minutes ago


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911040
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.363921
text:
  <eddy> ahh this new keyboard is a pleasure to ype with
  <eddy> :)
  <eddy> oops type
  <eddy> oh the irony
  <G> lol


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911040
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.364024
text:
  <aNuBiS-> she humps me from behind sometimes tho
  <aNuBiS-> as a joke
  <aNuBiS-> when shes walking behind me
  <JayWhoa> she wants to be a man
  <JayWhoa> a gay man
  <pagan> its all fun and games untill soemone gets their anus
  poked out


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911041
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.364085
text:
  <_Tenchi_> i also start feeling old when i see all these new
  fangled colors in
  M&Ms and Lucky Charms
  <Vulpyne> Didn't they only used to be like brown and yellow?
  <_Tenchi_> yeah
  <_Tenchi_> these days i cant tellw hether im eating M&Ms or
  skittles
  <rs> tenchi:  mix 'em together and you've got S&Ms


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911041
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.364134
text:
  <@A-Patriot-Missile> im gonna blow you.... up
  * marley is now known as A-Scud-Missile
  <+A-Scud-Missile> no
  * A-Scud-Missile was kicked by A-Patriot-Missile
  (DESTROYED!!!)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911041
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.364182
text:
  <CodeMason> You lack belief in all the thousands/hundreds of
  thousands of supreme beings that have been believed in at one
  point or another. So to them you are an atheist.
  <Kyonshi> CM is sooo smart ^_^
  <CodeMason> Kyo: It feels good to know my statements warrant
  an anime smilie face.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911043
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.364232
text:
  <lungfish> your job like involved relocation AND gay sex
  <Rottencrotch> wuts ur point
  <LuftWaffle-away> he didnt want to relocate


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911043
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.364291
text:
  <FZ1> raff on #banan
  <FZ1> raff using irc.efnet.pl ATMAN Network, Warsaw, Poland
  <FZ1> raff End of /WHOIS list.
  <shaan> wow
  <shaan> the polish have an irc server
  <shaan> i wonder how many it takes to run it


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911044
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.364432
text:
  [brs`IRC]: Amish girls are incredibly sexual.
  [brs`IRC]: You've never had a handjob until you've had one
  from a girl who
  [brs`IRC]: works a butter churn all day.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911044
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.364494
text:
  <TFA|MikeRotch> it's that Yamaha CRW-D1
  <TFA|MikeRotch> F1 I ean
  <TFA|MikeRotch> mwena
  <TFA|MikeRotch> god damn
  <TFA|MikeRotch> my fingers are getting to dat
  <TFA|MikeRotch> fat
  <TFA|MikeRotch> I need to go on a diet just so I can type
  properly on IRC
  <TFA|FulDog> haha
  <v3ktor> rofl


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911044
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.364538
text:
  <SamC42387> hmm here is a random question... can you be taken
  to court if you are 15, and you used your friends picture in a
  funny way on a website, yet they got offended?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911045
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.364591
text:
  <Goodlookinguy17> if anyone wants to cyber with a hot 17 year
  old male, message me
  <Owaru> if anyone wants to hear desperate pleas of attention
  by a decrepit 17 year old weirdo, msg me!
  <Owaru> i'll make you sound like you're normal!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911045
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.364639
text:
  <djrm> Q what is the penalty for exceeding your space quota?
  <Alaric> death by pineapple
  <djrm> ooo err


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911045
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.364698
text:
  <Knightmare> Well that was a night of fear and terror.
  <Timork> ?
  <Knightmare> I bought a bag of mushrooms and a bottle of
  Everclear.
  <Knightmare> Settled down for a nice evening of mind altering
  psychadelia
  <Timork> Bad trip huh?
  <Knightmare> Horrible, I never want to go through it again.
  <Knightmare> Somewhere along the line I installed emacs.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911046
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.364834
text:
  < plasmadis> One time my dad stole a roll of brightly-colored
  stickers from a butcher's counter that said "BREASTS" and went
  to the video store and stuck them on all the movies that
  looked likely to contain nudity.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911046
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.364875
text:
  corpratewar: gah, why would somebody encode a song @ 28kbps
  arkain88: Thats so small it could fit through a condom.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911046
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.364956
text:
  <Shovel> I ran across the worst named person in the world
  today...
  <Shovel> I'm sitting in the waiting room at my doctor's
  office, waiting for a physical before I go off to college in a
  few weeks.
  <Shovel> I'm a little early and there are other people in the
  waiting room so when the nurse comes out to call the next
  person I'm pretty sure it's not me.
  <Shovel> She walks out of the hallway, looks down at her
  clipboard and immediately turns around and goes back behind
  the door.
  <Shovel> She's obviously talking to some of the other nurses.
  <Shovel> When she comes back about 30 seconds later, she looks
  at the clipboard, takes a deep breath and says: "Shithead
  O'Neal, the doctor's able to see you now."
  <Shovel> A large black woman stands up quickly and yells in a
  surprsingly stereotypical black women voice "IT'S PRONOUNCED
  SHAW-THEED!"
  <Shovel> She storms off after the nurse, who is apologizing
  very loudly and everyone in the waiting room just looks at
  each other and exchange a few laughs and snickers.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911047
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.365038
text:
  <ndruo> i'm usig my onscreen keyboard
  <ndruo> i's very triksies
  <ndruo> he ltters re vry mall
  <NeroMan> Translation: The letters are very small.
  <ndruo> this will enhance my FPS skills
  <SuperJoe> What's the translation for that?
  <NeroMan> Translation: This will enhance my sexual ability.
  <ndruo> i hte you.
  <ndruo> GOD
  <NeroMan> Translation: I love you, GENERAL ZOD
  <ndruo> iffclt is this
  <ndruo> :(
  <NeroMan> Translation: This is difficult to the point I am
  saddened
  <SuperJoe> General Zod is pretty cool, I'll admit.
  <ndruo> 8=======D translte this
  <NeroMan> Translation: "My penis is small enough that I can
  make a life size depiction of it using IRC text."


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911047
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.365087
text:
  <ren> I fucking hate jehovahs witnesses
  <ren> I saw 2 men in black suits knocking on my door so I
  microwaved my hard drive :\


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911047
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.365146
text:
  <bofh> slugbug uh
  <bofh> One time I passed this person driving
  <bofh> One hand holding a cup of coffee
  <bofh> the other hand holding her cellphone to her ear
  <bofh> No hands on the keyboard.
  <bofh> She wound up trying to merge INTO us.
  <tgies> they call it a "steering wheel" I think


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911048
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.365190
text:
  <xjeff> the other day a tree almost fall on my house!
  <Mithandir> damn
  <xjeff> a big tree
  <Mithandir> better luck next time


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911048
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.365234
text:
  <POon> i just executed an underage camel
  <POon> and looted his hump
  <uli> wtf? what game is that?
  <POon> game?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911048
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.365311
text:
  <Jeedo> hey baby, whats up?
  <Indidge> umm....nothing?
  <Jeedo> So....want me to like come over today so we can fuck?
  <Indidge> Wait....did you want to speak to my daughter?
  <Jeedo> Yes  Mrs.Miller.. :-/


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911048
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.365372
text:
  <Weirdo> Sooty just brought a mouse into my room
  <Weirdo> brb
  *** Weirdo is now known as Weirdo|F00d


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911049
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.365426
text:
  <Corrupt_> brb i gotta stir the stew
  <shaan> that so sounds like he is masturbating
  <shaan> done "stirring the stew" there
  <Corrupt_> all stirred up
  <Corrupt_> i got some all over my face


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911049
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.365483
text:
  ArmAndLeg03: I need to think of a better gay-bar name
  ArmAndLeg03: I mean, "Dick's" works for now, but still
  Mazuki Projidy: haha
  Mazuki Projidy: well you could use...
  Mazuki Projidy: Manhole
  Mazuki Projidy: it's an actual gay bar (remember from The Most
  Disturbing Conversation Ever?)
  ArmAndLeg03: I remember
  ArmAndLeg03: But I like Dick's better than Manhole,
  unfortunately
  ArmAndLeg03: Though Manhole was a gay dance club
  Mazuki Projidy: oh whatever
  ArmAndLeg03: I could use that for the gay dance club in my
  story lol
  Mazuki Projidy: Dick's isn't a good name for a gay bar
  Mazuki Projidy: I know what to call it
  Mazuki Projidy: "The Mouthful"
  ArmAndLeg03: ...Evan
  ArmAndLeg03: I hate to say this
  ArmAndLeg03: But you are a fucking genius


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911049
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.365528
text:
  (Psycho`) im a farmer ;D
  (Psycho`) i built a heatsink farm
  (Gorre) ...
  (Psycho`) dont glare at me
  (Psycho`) they're free range heatsinks
  (Gorre) XD


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911050
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.365578
text:
  <jan^beer> shit, it seems like i have a problem every weekend
  with a different girl :)
  <jan^beer> I NEED A STABLE RELATIONSHIP!!
  <jan^beer> :)=
  <+Burned> a horse ?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911050
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.365674
text:
  <PureNRG> Is it ok if a parent forks a few children then dies,
  leaving the children to finish what they have to do then die
  themselves later ? or should the parent stay doing nothing and
  reap the kids ?
  <boog2> It's tragic if children die before their parents.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911050
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.365734
text:
  <Julia_M> Arthur C. Clarke:
  <Julia_M> "There is hopeful symbolism in the fact that flags
  do not wave in a vacuum."
  <Julia_M> you know...space?
  <Jeff_R> ya
  <Julia_M> there can be no nations that can conquer space! aww
  yea it's great
  <Jeff_R> I don't believe the whole vacuum thing...I
  mean...that would be one big ass Dirt Devil dirt bag to hold
  all that stuff in space


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911051
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.365785
text:
  <Judith> if you were trying to market condoms, what would you
  try to use for a slogan?
  <Redeemer> "Wear the fuck out of us."


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911051
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.365848
text:
  <Chu-Chu-Rocket> dole's making it really hard for me to keep
  my IRC window open when my mom walks by
  <Foobar> just /clear
  <Chu-Chu-Rocket> yeah, but that looks suspicious
  <dole> dude
  <dole> she just cut off the second rapist's dick
  <dole> and left him to bleed in the bathtub
  <dole> and he bled to death
  * Chu-Chu-Rocket clears.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911051
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.365908
text:
  <mixi_dk> Im such a perfectist
  <mixi_dk> *pefettionist
  <mixi_dk> *perfectonst
  <mixi_dk> God dammit!
  <mixi_dk> perfrecsist
  <mixi_dk> OKAY! I give up!
  <MikeClassic> Why? perfectionist is easy to spell..?
  <mixi_dk> How did you do that?!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911051
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.365979
text:
  <Kash> BW has eveyone catassing
  <CrashCat> that's leopardassing to you
  <Kranrev> tigerassing
  <Rasputin> I'm monkeyassing! :)
  <Mako> just one ass? it is of no use to me.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911052
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.366040
text:
  <|CS|Lothar> but it canadian money and we all know canadian
  money isnt worth the paper it's printed on
  <Lareonis> Kinda like American treaties?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911052
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.366121
text:
  <Y> I dl'ed the Tatu video
  <Fuzen> No one is going to remember them in a month, I
  guarantee you.
  <Y> that's because everyone who listens to them now except for
  myself did so because they saw them make out in the video
  first
  <Fuzen> Correct.
  <Fuzen> That's the entire reason that they're popular.
  <Fuzen> They make out in their video.
  <Fuzen> I would advise them to continue this trend, but
  increase in gratuity each video. At that rate, they'll be
  fucking donkeys by their next album.
  <Y> next video, "All the things she said club remix"
  <Y> they take their clothes off and snowball in the rain
  <Y> they get hardcore gangbanged in the video after that
  <Fuzen> Then it's on to bukkake.
  <Y> it'll be snuff porn by track 10, and there goes their
  careers
  <Fuzen> I look forward to that day.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911052
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.366172
text:
  <Astroboy> Im going to murder the next girl I ever hear make
  some comment about being over weight.
  <Astroboy> Unless the girl is like 500 pounds.
  <Trinity> I am so over weight.
  <Astroboy> Trinity way to be a absurdly difficult distance
  away for me to murder you.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911053
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.366264
text:
  <MosServ> Katto: They will keep fighting, they think that
  dying in battle for their God is the greatest honor. But they
  also think they'll go to hell if they have pork in their
  stomach. Solution: Pork bullets.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911053
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.366318
text:
  <fetman> when I read the quotes on bash.org I feel that I too
  wan't to be as stupid as they are and make such stupid
  comments and make everyone laugh
  <fetman> How do I become as stupid as they are?
  <tfg> There are two steps, as follows:
  <tfg> 1) Bang your head repeatedly on the wall until you pass
  out
  <tfg> 2) Repeat step 1 until you get that stupid idea that you
  can actually be funny out of your head


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911054
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.366372
text:
  <jmess> this is the best set up.
  <jmess> laying on my beanbag ircing
  <jmess> hahaha SAD
  <Fabio> hahaha
  <Fabio> as bad as me
  <Fabio> in bed ircing


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911054
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.366419
text:
  Wangtangs2 <AUTO-REPLY> :  taking a dump ;) >:o PUSH!!!
  PRoGRaMMeRQ: I'm taking a screenshot of that and pasting that
  on my front website


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911054
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.366515
text:
  <tress> i have no arms
  <tress> i have to type by blowing through a straw
  <tress> i dropped my straw


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911055
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.366617
text:
  <SomeRandom> Looks like Operation Iraqi Freedom is almost
  over.
  <Diablo1399> Bah, "Operation Iraqi Freedom" is a shit name.
  <SomeRandom> Well what would you call it then?
  <Diablo1399> Why, "Operation Who's Your Baghdaddy" of course.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911055
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.366684
text:
  <JungleMason> There's a hole in my heart that can only be
  filled by you.
  <Gabealicious> Have you tried epoxy?
  <JungleMason> Yes, and the smell reminds me of you.
  <Gabealicious> Or... maybe some of that spray foam
  insulation...
  <JungleMason> I LOVE that shit.
  <Gabealicious> me too!
  <JungleMason> Tastes GREAT on a Triscuit.
  <Gabealicious> Yes ... some folks call it 'ez cheez'
  <JungleMason> Burger King calls it "Ranch Dip."


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911056
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.366798
text:
  <MadHatter> I just got this spam:
  <MadHatter> READY TO BREAK YOUR
  <MadHatter> NEW YEAR'S RESOLUTIONS??
  <MadHatter> "I'm not gonna look at HARDCORE PORN anymore."
  <MadHatter> "I won't GAMBLE ONLINE anymore."
  <MadHatter> "I'm gonna JUST SAY NO."


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911056
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.366867
text:
  <@FirebirdGM> I just called my Futureshop and asked them how
  much a 20 GB Hard drive weighed when it was full with
  information, compared to when it was empty.
  <@FirebirdGM> The guy that was on the phone told me that it
  was only a few pounds difference.
  <@FirebirdGM> And that's why I don't shop at futureshop.
  <%Physic3> I think their bullshit factor is the best though.
  No matter how absurd your question may be, they always give an
  answer.
  <@Firebird> Lol, I should call again and be like 'uhh, yes. I
  just bought a New ACIT BIOS and my UDP Packets are being
  Tracert'd by my UNIX Box without my Fortran application being
  applied to all outgoing UDP and TCP packets. My Ping never is
  like that, why?!"
  <@Firebird> He would probably be like 'Yes'.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911056
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.366926
text:
  <naga> 'dixy normus' won for class princess this year at our
  school
  <naga> at the assembly, they called her name, but she didn't
  come down to take the prize
  <naga> took 'em 5 minutes to figure it out
  <parnbl00d> sounds sexual.
  <parnbl00d> was she absent or somethin?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911057
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.366976
text:
  <finch|a> pie; if you sued for getting a tattoo, you're a
  fucking idiot. about as stupid as sueing someone for an
  accident
  <Zachery> finch, never been to the states?
  <finch|a> no


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911057
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.367026
text:
  <spoob> drewb; it's been so long since I've had my cock sucked
  that I'm not sure it can handle less than one atmosphere
  anymore


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911057
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.367094
text:
  <dm> I discovered that you'd never get an answer to a problem
  from Linux Gurus by asking. You have to troll in order for
  someone to help you with a Linux problem.
  <dm> For example, I didn't know how to find files by contents
  and the man pages were way too confusing. What did I do? I
  knew from experience that if I just asked, I'd be told to read
  the man pages even though it was too hard for me.
  <dm> Instead, I did what works. Trolling. By stating that
  Linux sucked because it was so hard to find a file compared to
  Windows, I got every self-described Linux Guru around the
  world coming to my aid. They gave me examples after examples
  of different ways to do it. All this in order to prove to
  everyone that Linux was better.
  * ion has quit IRC (Ping timeout)
  <dm> brings a tear to my eye... :') so true..
  <dm> So if you're starting out Linux, I advise you to use the
  same method as I did to get help. Start the sentence with
  "Linux is gay because it can't do XXX like Windows can". You
  will have PhDs running to tell you how to solve your problems.
  <dm> this person must be a kindred spirit of mine


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911057
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.367143
text:
  KajiTheGaurdian: Funny thing. There were these papers by kids
  posted on the wall of the temple about why being Jewish is
  good, and one kid wrote "I like being Jewish because it means
  I'm special," but he wrote it as "spechul".
  Dolorous Decay: He sounds pretty fucking spechul to me


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911058
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.367223
text:
  <@`2L_verkink> eval('document.forms[0].elements[' +
  elementCount + '].options[document.forms[0].elements[' +
  elementCount + '].selectedIndex].value')
  <@`2L_verkink> whats the probleM!?!?!?!?
  <yods> the problem?
  <yods> thats easy
  <yods> i dont understand SQL
  <yods> if i did
  <yods> i might have a chance
  <@`2L_verkink> if u did
  <@`2L_verkink> it wouldn't help
  <@`2L_verkink> cause
  <@`2L_verkink> this is javascript


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911058
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.367274
text:
  <Crappy> tbe
  <Crappy> er
  <Crappy> the internet is cool
  <Crappy> my triumphant statement somewhat dampened by my
  inability to type "the"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911058
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.367321
text:
  <methangas> this is EA's support lines automatic answering
  machine; we already got your money, now please go away


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911059
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.367373
text:
  <helminthes> does anyone else ever notice when you're sex0ring
  a fat chic it seems like a good idea at the time, but when
  your done you feel an overwhelming emptiness?
  <helminthes> no one?
  <hakan> ...
  <helminthes> :p


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911059
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.367428
text:
  <@Vlad_The1Inhaler> fuck
  <@Vlad_The1Inhaler> my cat died
  <@Surtsey> LOL
  <@Vlad_The1Inhaler> ...
  -!- Vlad_The1Inhaler
  [~joel@c-24-91-210-223.hsd1.ma.comcast.net] has left #sebo
  <@Surtsey> oops


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911059
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.367480
text:
  <eva> In Thailand, Police believed a young girl committed
  suicide after getting stuck on a level of Bomberman.
  <eva> ahhaha thats gold
  <Spacecow> 09 Oct 02
  <etoilet> i hate suicide bombers


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911059
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.367562
text:
  <Coota> Hmmm... I'm in a dilemma. I'm in love with accents,
  especially British ones, but I don't like fat girls. Now, the
  girl who wants to make out with me *does* have an accent, but
  she is a little overweight... what to do...
  <PatPandaHat> make her exercise before you'll make out with
  her.
  <Coota> Pat: Hee. Tell her I have a minimum PFT score
  requirement before I make out with a girl? ;)
  <Darien> tell her it's a religious thing
  <PatPandaHat> "Sorry, I don't do pork unless it's lean."


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911060
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.367626
text:
  <Bone Man> anyone know how to setup a streming thingie for a
  webcam
  <RonWeasley> www.surveyorcorp.com get webcam32 and go crazy
  <InsomniFox> bone- have you got a bible handy?
  <Mort-Hog> Yes. The Bible tells you how to set up your webcam.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911060
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.367671
text:
  <GaPSk8t3r> if i was drafted for war, id use every fucking cfg
  hack and aimbot out there.....i doubt iraq has wwcl


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911061
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.367786
text:
  <Garou>  ok, I need hot sandwich ideas
  <Garou>  I got Ruben/Buffalo Chicken Burger/Meatball
  <West>  chicken ranch
  <Rail>  philly cheesesteak
  <Garou>  hrm philly cheesesteak
  <Garou>  good one, I'll put that one down
  <Shinji>  Garou: Larry King, Oprah, John Goodman.
  <Garou>  Those are Sandwichs?
  <Shinji>  No, it's a sandwich.
  <Shinji>  And boy, is it a hot one.
  <Garou>  facepalm.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911061
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.367842
text:
  <_yoda_> I met two people from irc
  <_yoda_> both were loser/weirdos
  <_yoda_> the moral of the story is most ppl on irc are losers/
  weirdos
  <amorfati> that's not really a large enough sample to draw any
  conclusions from
  <amorfati> maybe you just got lucky
  <amorfati> next person you meet might be a full-fledged psycho
  :D


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911061
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.367886
text:
  (@T-56): anyone up for some drunken baseball fun next weekend?
  (+de-v1): baseball?
  (+de-v1): k before i just THOUGHT you were gay
  (+de-v1): now i know for sure
  (+de-v1): :P
  (@T-56): steph: ok, scratch baseball, how about water polo
  (+de-v1): you just want to be in a pool with 20 guys in
  speedos are trying to grab balls


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911061
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.367940
text:
  <Kristof> What's black and has 27 tits??
  <Kristof> The rubbish bag outside the cancer clinic.
  <Kristof> Tragic
  <seymansey> oh god
  <seymansey> thats bad


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911062
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.367983
text:
  [+JM_LOL8] Good thing I have LOTS of HD
  [@Tabitha] My penis is bigger than your HD.
  [@Tabitha] We should all merge our penises into one big,
  superpenis.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911062
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.368027
text:
  <Wes> While most dudes go day-to-day waiting for sex to
  happen, the sex offenders go out and MAKE it happen.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911062
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.368127
text:
  <ReAc> i never alternate between wanking and typing
  <ReAc> that's just unhygenic
  <ReAc> unless you're typing with one hand
  <Hecateh> im typing with the up strokes


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911063
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.368222
text:
  <Kiyone> i know you live in australia and everything, but do
  you know who vanilla ice is?
  <reaper> yes
  <reaper> he used to be a jazz musician, and became a pornstar


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911063
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.368286
text:
  <shmooo> i cant wait to see my gf tonite
  <shmooo> im gonna eat her sweet pussy
  <gortho> we're happy for you
  <shmooo> it's like sweet strawberries
  <psmylie> what?!?
  <psmylie> ...
  <psmylie> you're a virgin, aren't you?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911063
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.368328
text:
  Dev100666: I bet in 1997 you would not have guessed you would
  be getting married before duke nukem forever came out


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911064
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.368384
text:
  * Charles wakes up. Dammit, I can't even get laid in my own
  dreams. ;_;
  <Charles> My dream was just about meeting some girl who was
  willing to sex me up, and then two weeks worth of meeting up
  in various places to do so and getting interrupted and
  sidetracked for various reasons.
  <Mads> Oooh, oooh, go on, do go on!
  <Charles> Sex at my house? Parents come home. Sex at the mall
  bathroom? Security guard breaks it up. Sex in the woods?
  Attacked by wolves. Sex in a cottege in the woods? A witch
  lives there.
  <Mads> ...
  <Mads> That's the weirdest fucking datesim ever, mate.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911064
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.368434
text:
  <DrUDgE> black|one: what is your mom on top of me nude?
  <DrUDgE> black|one: a good time!
  <black|one> not for you..
  <black|one> my mom is 60.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911064
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.368488
text:
  * trib has just *almost* burned his flat to the ground
  <bobstay> wow
  <bobstay> how did you manage that?
  <bobstay> the ground's quite a way away
  <trib> I put a big lump of meat int he oven and roasted it
  <trib> and used the smoke detector as a timer


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911065
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.368582
text:
  *** NinjaStu listens to abba - dancing queen
  *** suds listens to a-teens - dancing queen
  *** EvilJoven listens to Bitchy Customer - My Webpage Isnt
  Working (Why wont you die remix)
  *** Fraggy plays 'Trance Control - Welcome to the House'


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911065
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.368640
text:
  <AdeptaCheese> now
  <AdeptaCheese> im scared to ask this
  <AdeptaCheese> but what the fuck
  <AdeptaCheese> is bukkake
  <Al3xand3r> :o
  <Al3xand3r> :x
  <Al3xand3r> XD
  <Al3xand3r> I have no idea...


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911065
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.368699
text:
  ð Zibblsnrt simply wants food (there's /none/ in the house
  ATM) .. ponders
  making a pizza run or something
  <rob`> zib; isn't halifax still under a few meters ice?
  <Zibblsnrt> rob: And?
  <Zibblsnrt> :)
  <rob`> is there a tunnel network or something?
  <Zibblsnrt> rob: No, we simply float atop it because we're
  just that suave


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911066
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.368773
text:
  <BlackDeth> man this sucks
  <BlackDeth> why is it that all drugs make you lazy and useless
  <BlackDeth> they should invent one that motivates you to do
  homework and shit


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911066
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.368837
text:
  <Jules--> i mainly listen to battle music
  <Jules--> which is basically rappers
  <Jules--> insulting each other and calling each other fags
  <Jules--> its like irc set to a beat


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911066
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.368932
text:
  <AMD_aTHLON_MP>
  mnajdi@microsoft.aint.nothing.but.a.system-crash.net
  <C0ZMIC|WoRk> yeh
  <C0ZMIC|WoRk> i work for microsoft
  <AMD_aTHLON_MP> oh ok
  <AMD_aTHLON_MP> to u know l cracked the windows xp home
  <C0ZMIC|WoRk> heh so what
  <C0ZMIC|WoRk> many people crack our software
  <AMD_aTHLON_MP> do u know the trick
  <C0ZMIC|WoRk> once you try and install service pack 1 your ip
  will be logged and traced
  <AMD_aTHLON_MP> l work for the tnt2 cracker team
  <AMD_aTHLON_MP> we cracked over 40 milon softwares
  <AMD_aTHLON_MP> look man
  <AMD_aTHLON_MP> we got a ip logging that gives u fake traces
  <C0ZMIC|WoRk> microsoft already makes millions from coporate
  buyers
  <AMD_aTHLON_MP> that how we cracked win xp home
  <C0ZMIC|WoRk> i already got your IP from IRC
  <C0ZMIC|WoRk> @acc6-ppp29.hay.dialup.connect.net.au
  <AMD_aTHLON_MP> ok
  <AMD_aTHLON_MP> l, joking
  <C0ZMIC|WoRk> i can call your ISP and ask them who you are
  <AMD_aTHLON_MP> l not evevn useing win xp home
  <AMD_aTHLON_MP> l,m sorry
  <AMD_aTHLON_MP> l was only jking
  <AMD_aTHLON_MP> plz forgive me
  <AMD_aTHLON_MP> l got a licesed copy of win98
  <AMD_aTHLON_MP> plz forgive me


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911068
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.369088
text:
  <Geekzilla> "Ah. I see here you were a Geek Squad Special
  Agent"
  <Geekzilla> "Yes, sir. Three years in the field. I was quite
  good at my job"
  <Geekzilla> "I see. Well, thanks for coming in to interview,
  unfortunately we have no need for your services"
  <Geekzilla> "But... but I thought you said you needed an
  experienced, talented IT tech?!"
  <Geekzilla> "Exactly.  Good luck in your job search"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911069
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.369186
text:
  <Dude68> I just spent the last 15 minutes talking to an AI bot
  <Homie22m> i think it was like 50 minutes
  <Dude68> shhh.. I'm gonna pretend that it was only 15... so I
  don't sound lame...


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911070
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.369372
text:
  [Zaun] Zoid?
  [Zoid] Yes?
  [Zaun] Have you ever been to Vegas?
  [Zoid] No
  [Zaun] Let me rephrase that. Have you ever paid for sex?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911070
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.369424
text:
  <c-rOCK> pen hates you
  <c-rOCK> waffle boy
  <eggo> pen loves me
  <eggo> infact i can feel his penis pushing past my anus right
  now
  <Guilty> I thought pen was castrated by the Russian government
  to make him a more efficant soviet hax0r


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911071
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.369524
text:
  <fitcher> my dad's credit card # is 4**0 0**1 3**3 7**7 exp 0*
  /0*
  <fitcher> whoops
  <fitcher> ignore that
  <fitcher> type /clear
  <ProudCdn> why would you give your credit Card # out?
  <fitcher> i was ordering a game off this guy


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911071
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.369586
text:
  [Talrin] (OOC), "When you beat me in hand to hand combat..."
  [Axel] (OOC), "*challenges Talrin to Rock, Paper, Scissors*"
  [Cordt] (OOC), "Hand to hand."
  [Cordt] (OOC), "He's got a point."
  [Talrin] (OOC), "Okay..."
  [Talrin] (OOC), "...1...2...3...ROCK!"
  [Axel] (OOC), "1...2...3...NATURAL TWENTY!"
  [Talrin] (OOC), "..."


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911071
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.369652
text:
  <Cross> Oh, wow. Old school papers.
  <Cross> This one was on 'alternative energy sources'. This is
  from near the end, when I was really too tired to be writing:
  <Cross> "Wind energy is a method of collecting power from the
  blowing of the wind. Not only is this a clean and renewable
  energy source, but it can actually displace excess Carbon
  Dioxide in an area. Problems behind wind energy also exist. It
  is not available in many areas, and requires a lot of money to
  build. The wind turbines can also interfere with television
  and radio signals and cause noise pollution. Also, birds can
  fly into the rotors."
  <Cross> "Then they have to send the janitor Steve out to clean
  the thing, and it just ruins his day. Then he goes home and
  beats his kids. So if you support wind energy, you support
  domestic violence."
  <Cross> That's when you know you're tired.
  <Herring> That is awesome.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911072
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.369705
text:
  <rioter> i heard a car accident last night
  <rioter> and laughed
  <rioter> then my mum knocked on my door and was like your
  sister had  car acident out side your door and you didnt come
  out
  <rioter> and i laughed even harder


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911072
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.369759
text:
  <Pi|Mu|Rho> http://www.bash.org/?36444
  <Ozy> geoff gets that lots
  <Pi|Mu|Rho> I can imagine
  <Ozy> theres a whole bunch of people stuck to the ceiling
  nearby my desk, roughly where geoff sits on the floor above us
  <Pi|Mu|Rho> That's such a hilarious image


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911072
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.369803
text:
  Helrich: so i was at the diner this morning, and i was really
  hungry.
  Helrich: i got a big plate of scrambled eggs and started
  eating them super fast
  Helrich: when i stopped to breathe, half the plate was gone
  and i shouted DOMINATING!!!
  Helrich: everyone in the diner stopped what they were doing
  and stared at me for along time until someone from across the
  room shouted HUMILIATION!!!
  Helrich: I gotta stop playing Quake.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911073
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.369844
text:
  CharmQuark42: a math sheep?
  Quillethe: it would explain the counting
  CharmQuark42: it does integ-wools!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911073
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.369940
text:
  <Da> US officers say they have found thousands of boxes
  containing vials of white powder and liquid at a "suspicious
  site" near Latifiya south of Baghdad.
  <Da> sounds like a fuckin party!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911073
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.369999
text:
  <tigrow> if u think its getting to hot masterman
  <tigrow> put water on it
  <tigrow> use icewater
  <tigrow> they need that the first 2 hours or so
  <Crimpy> dont forget to jam knives into the back while you do
  it
  <Sacred_> you guys are mean
  <Sacred_> yer gonna fuck his box up
  <Sacred_> use olive oil


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911074
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.370046
text:
  <SmugLynnPlums> with all this quote shit going on, everyone on
  IRC is going to witty as fuck or make an ass out of themself
  doing so.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911074
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.370134
text:
  FFVI: I once told a friend to shoot me if I ever passed 3000
  posts on AT. Total Posts Made - 8000...wow :/
  arctic pirate: you once had a friend?
  FFVI: One. But then his parents got a restraining order when I
  showed up for his kindergarten graduation.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911075
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.370216
text:
  <gleep> Heh.  You people don't want to hear how one of my
  ex-bosses performed a mercy killing on a family's cat at their
  request.
  <Sypher-Ryn> Yes we do
  <gleep> I actually think it's quite funny.
  <Sypher-Ryn> come on!! Mercy killings!
  <me^2> tell us
  <DrCloud> o.O;
  <ashie> O.O
  <gleep> He was visiting a cousin's family, they lived out on
  in the country.  While he was there, they told them about
  their cat that was really old, and had gotten quite sick.  The
  vet had told them they should have it put to sleep.  But they
  just couldn't do it... they started to drive it the 20 miles
  to the vet a couple times but never got very far.
  <gleep> So when he was talking to their dad, he said he could
  take care of it.  He had his pistol in his truck.  So that
  evening he finds the cat and takes it out back of the house.
  <gleep> (Don't read this, sensative viewers! ) So he's out
  there with his 357, looking down at the cat, who really /was/
  in horrible shape.  So he's about to shoot the cat when...
  Something came over him.  He stuck his foot under the cat and
  kicked it into the air... and shot it midair.  The 357 blew
  the poor critter to bits.  Then he turns around and sees...
  The ENTIRE FAMILY staring at him through the picture window.
  <FJ> HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111
  <ashie> best story ever


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911075
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.370263
text:
  <Guruchild> i think that babies should be abortable up until 2
  years.
  <Red_Dog> 2 years? I say 18.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911075
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.370329
text:
  <dreamkast0r> This is the abosolute worst joke I've ever found
  on a string cheese wrapper.
  <kingLatency> what is it?
  <dreamkast0r> "What happened to the fireproof, unbreakable,
  shockproof, waterproof watch?"
  <dreamkast0r> "It is lost!"
  <dreamkast0r> They just aren't trying anymore.
  <dreamkast0r> That's not a joke.
  <dreamkast0r> It's a sad story.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911075
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.370382
text:
  <Berzerker> they gave christopher reaves a standing ovation
  <Berzerker> and like
  <Berzerker> he cant even stand up
  <Berzerker> so hes like
  <Berzerker> wtf


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911076
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.370432
text:
  <hYpOcRiTe> this conversation is weird, from sex to sleep
  <razors_edge> kind of like every night for me
  <hYpOcRiTe> me too, except without the sex :/


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911076
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.370483
text:
  <[AFT]^Kempi> what really got her mad was....
  <[AFT]^Kempi> when i was burning a CD and got up from sex 1/2
  way through and changed the cd
  <[AFT]^Kempi> she didn't talk to me for a while


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911077
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.370634
text:
  <dreln> i change my nick alot
  <Renski> ah
  <Renski> you were on the last bsrf irc too then, I remember
  some guy say exactly the same thing
  <Renski> cant you just choose one and stick with it?
  <dreln> no im the unstable release


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911077
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.370690
text:
  <Beaph> Whatcha gonna make?
  <Alacard2k> Spaghetti, beef stroganoff, or tacos. I don\'t
  feel like the chicken tonight.
  <Beaph> Mmm... Beef Strokin\' off.
  <Alacard2k> well it\'s down to two now


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911078
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.370783
text:
  <Ettin> Still, I thought the war would be over by now.
  <Ettin> No country has an infinite supply of suicide bombers.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911078
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.370843
text:
  <omega> i like star trek because it's actually pretty
  realistic.  the technology is fiction, but it follows real
  physics
  <Kuiper> In Star Trek, whenever there are torpedoes or phaser
  fire hitting a ship, you can hear the explosions even though
  they're in space.  How is that "real physics?"
  <omega> in space, explosions are actually louder
  <omega> because there is no air to get in the way
  <omega> dumbass


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911078
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.370892
text:
  <Caius> in the last year I've broken the screen on: SE S700i,
  SE P910i, iPod 40GB, Pentax S6, Palm Zire 72 (and slightly
  before the last year, Palm M100)
  <Libertus> Caius: Have you considered pen and paper?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911078
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.370943
text:
  <Lyrael> you wouldn't even miss me
  <The_Sorcerer> it just wouldn't be the same without you
  <The_Sorcerer> for one, the average user count would drop from
  30 to 29


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911079
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.371009
text:
  <saboteur> sometimes i wish i didtn have a penis
  <saboteur> like when i get a wood standing up
  <Damien> lol sab
  <saboteur> and its hard to hide
  <phase5> same
  <phase5> or like, when your walking down the street
  <phase5> and it hangs out the bottom of your pants
  <phase5> and drags on the ground
  <saboteur> haha
  <saboteur> yeah exactly
  <k> or when you lie down and planes crash into it


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911079
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.371065
text:
  <Derian> Guys, I'll be back in a few minutes. My bedroom's on
  fire.
  <Bryan_Clark> I don't know what's worse... the fact that it's
  on fire, or the fact that she actually took the time to *tell*
  us that it's on fire.....


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911079
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.371113
text:
  <sugar> if superman and batman got into a fight, who would
  win?
  <muffins> well, superman wears his undies on the
  outside...batman wears his on his head
  <muffins> tough call


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911080
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.371167
text:
  <Berzerker> like one time i shit on a bench in my school
  playground
  <Berzerker> and like it smelt so bad
  <Berzerker> and i covered it with playground gravel
  <Berzerker> and like when the cafeteria aid came the next day
  she cleared it off with her hand
  <Berzerker> and like
  <Berzerker> poop!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911080
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.371214
text:
  <exii> I was just talking to my brother.
  <exii> And I said "okay, its 10:10, I have to go boot up the
  shower."


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911080
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.371256
text:
  Christian[LG]: install windows ME or take cyanide, which is
  the better suicide option ?
  Mouce: ME
  True|Fogge: ME makes you take cyanide
  kronny: nah cyanide, it dont take over an hour to take effect


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911080
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.371337
text:
  <27946889> hola.
  <Losifer> Do I know you?
  <27946889> No, I found you on random chat.
  <27946889> What, just because you don't know someone you won't
  talk to them?
  <Losifer> Pretty much.  This is my work account.  I conduct
  business through this account.  I don't have time to chat.
  <27946889> Sorry.
  <27946889> i think you're very rude
  <Losifer> That's interesting.  I find it more rude to continue
  to send unsolicited messages to a stranger once you've been
  told that the stranger in question isn't interested in talking
  to you.
  <27946889> why are you in such a bad mood, you are so young,
  sorry that i thought it would be nice to talk to you because i
  saw your info and i found you interesting,,,
  <Losifer> I'm in a bad mood because I'm working and you keep
  interrupting me.  Please go away.
  <27946889> so where do you work?
  <27946889> let me ask you something, how come it says satan
  ate your ears in your info?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911081
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.371394
text:
  <NaStyChoC> hey babe asl?
  <sweetangelic> hi, 14/f/aus ^^
  <NaStyChoC> ive a real big cock..
  <sweetangelic> o how big??
  <NaStyChoC> 9in
  <sweetangelic> dats prty big, mines only 8
  <NaStyChoC> ok
  <NaStyChoC> wait wtf


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911081
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.371518
text:
  <Ace073> wtf
  <Ace073> i was just watching australia idol and they called it
  'straya nidol'
  <Ace073> wtf!!
  <Ace073> why perpetuate the idea that we're hillbillies?
  <Ace073> freakin south africa doesnt come on tv and say 'BLACK
  PEEPLE GTFO'
  <Montana> Dude, thats so gay.
  <Ace073> i know.. why dont we just rename the stupid continent
  Straya >_<
  <Montana> No
  <Montana> I mean
  <Montana> You watch Australia Idol


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911082
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.371570
text:
  <Kevyn> I lent my friend money last nite so he could get a lap
  dance from a stripper. And he just said to me on AIM, "hey,
  thanks for the lap dance"
  <Kevyn> I'm so glad people can't overhear conversations on
  AIM.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911082
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.371616
text:
  <[vr]bLaZe|wErK> i finally registered for me fall classes
  <[zT]Lunchie> i hope english is one of them


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911082
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.371661
text:
  ARcanUS NUMquam: night is sitll young
  live billboard: virginal
  ARcanUS NUMquam: the barrier between today and tommorrow has
  barely been pressured
  live billboard: but soon it will be penetrated
  live billboard: father time will thrust his way into the young
  tommorrow
  ARcanUS NUMquam: using his tool that he nicknamed the "second
  hand" when it strikes 12


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911082
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.371708
text:
  (+RossH) I don't get tested....I just fuck women.....and tell
  them I have aids......when they freak out....go get tested and
  call me crying from joy because they are clean I know I passed
  (+RossH) I'm cheap


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911083
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.371763
text:
  <Yaksha> I asked my brother what he wanted for Christmas.
  <Yaksha> He said he wanted cold hard cash.
  <Yaksha> So that's exactly what I gave him.
  <Yaksha> I got 20 $1 bills, soaked them in water and put them
  in the freezer.
  <Yaksha> When he got it, it was just a block of green ice that
  took a day to thaw.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911083
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.371821
text:
  garrett8675309: heard you threatened to shoot my girlfriend...
  imptacular: yeah
  garrett8675309: you should get your membership card in 7-10
  days


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911083
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.371882
text:
  <diminishe> Anyone wanna help me debug some code?
  <PreZ> diminishe, do you have a specific problem?
  <diminishe> well, its more like pseudo code


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911083
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.371946
text:
  <eGagz-Trevor`> i spilt weiner juice in my lap
  <blue[2q]> WHAT?!
  <eGagz-Trevor`> the stuff that comes out of those cans with
  those vienna weiners


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911084
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.372061
text:
  <Crowbar> yah, if you cut the ass while shaving, you might as
  well just stick your fingers in and rip it wide open.  at
  least that way you can claim you were raped
  <Crowbar> oh man, i just woke up my wife from laughing
  <Knower|> <wife> what's wrong honey?  <crowbar> Oh, haha, just
  giving the guys some advice on anal tearing.  <wife> oh,
  alright...just keep it down.  <wife> wait, WHAT?!?!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911084
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.372122
text:
  <liqshot|GreenZ> only thing more superior then the white man
  is an albino white man
  <liqshot|GreenZ> the whitest man of all


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911085
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.372215
text:
  Declan: I dunno...I love her, but this new years is going to
  be uber depressing
  grencez: her friends are much lamer than both of you combined
  Declan: The thought of her getting high at a party where
  everyone is drunk while I sit at home and code Perl or
  something is kind of too much to bear
  CyanFlux: maybe try coding something in c


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911085
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.372267
text:
  <Sarah> lol, i was at a speech and debate tournament in 9th
  grade at a public high school in albuquerque.  the counselor's
  office was right next to the culinary arts office.  on the
  counselor's office window, there was a poster that said
  "Suicide: A permanent solution to a temporary problem" and on
  the culinary arts window there was a poster that read: "Use
  the right knife"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911085
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.372320
text:
  <PONGO> ok... this is my first time on IRC
  <PONGO> how do I start my own channel?
  <Optikal> just join a channel that doesn't exist
  <PONGO> nice try
  <PONGO> =)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911086
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.372376
text:
  <Bealzubub> yeah.  my mom's going fucking insane with this
  family tree shit.
  <Bealzubub> she been hogging the internet, lookin up all of
  our family incestry.
  <Acherton> lmfao!
  <Bealzubub> ancestry*
  <Ktulu> lmao
  <Bealzubub> damnit!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911086
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.372458
text:
  <@Shively> my last college had a guy who was smearing feces on
  the bathroom walls
  <+PickleHead> ewww
  <@Shively> yea well the guy at our college was becomming so
  popular that the student goverment put an article out on him
  <+PickleHead> have you seen the book called Brown spots on the
  walls by "hooflung pooh"?
  <+PickleHead> :P
  <@Shively> he said he would stop if he could have a spot for
  somehting he wanted to say
  <@Shively> so they gave it to him and he defended it as an art
  form
  <+PickleHead> LMAO
  <+PickleHead> you can't be serious
  <@Shively> saying that feces drawn on walls is an expression
  of fecal art
  <@Shively> so
  <+PickleHead> ......................................
  <+PickleHead> fecal... art....
  <@Shively> the janitors responded with their own article


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911086
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.372556
text:
  <roddyboy> man it sucks...
  <roddyboy> phone got stolen tonight :(
  <drjazz> call someone who cares
  <drjazz> oh wait


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911087
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.372603
text:
  <_Godless_> what can say to the ex that killed a part of you
  that you'll never get back ... with out souding bitter?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911087
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.372654
text:
  <Voices> I went to the bookstore this morning and saw a book
  called 'AOL for Dummies'
  <Jerec> That's like killing one bird with two stones!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911087
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.372752
text:
  <TheMaxx> interesting cash making tactic i've discovered in
  Rome: Total War
  <TheMaxx> once a city starts getting really, really... big..
  the citizens start getting a little uppity, especially if your
  city lacks certain amenities befitting a city of its size
  <TheMaxx> so fine
  <TheMaxx> remove the garrison, crank up the taxes and let them
  revolt
  <TheMaxx> army moves back in with little opposition (peasants
  vs. legions, pshaw).. then execute 70% of the population and
  take their gold
  <TheMaxx> before you know it they'll start clamouring for
  democracy
  <Deltan> If there were a dictator of the year award, you'd be
  a shoe in.
  <Deltan> That Saddam fellow has nothing on you.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911087
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.372829
text:
  -> -#tfc- [notice:#tfc] YOU HAVE RECEIVED A FATAL ERROR, PRESS
  ALT + F4 TO REPAIR THIS IMMEDIATELY
  <Spearhead> should i try it? :-P
  <Spearhead> oh here we go
  <Cobrabat> go on tell me what happens
  <Spearhead> nothin
  <Spearhead> :-P
  <VooDoo> press alt and F4 at the same time
  <Spearhead> nothing happens voods :-P
  <Spearhead> does it have to be a capital f?
  <Spearhead> hmmm xp that dont work voods :-P
  <VooDoo> F4 as in the buttons above the numbers
  <Spearhead> ooooh like the F1 Help button?
  <Cobrabat> do you hit F and 4 together?
  <Spearhead> i tried that cob it didnt work
  <Spearhead> unless you have to hold shift as well to make it a
  capital F
  <VooDoo> like the F1 help button
  <VooDoo> n00bz...


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911088
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.372877
text:
  <fallenMeSsIAH> damn cops, they piss me off, SHE Wanted to
  have sex infront of the police station not me, i am an
  unwilling participant, charge her for rape if it will get me
  out of a indecent exposure charge
  <BenZor> fallenMeSsIAH: you got laid... consider it a miracle


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911088
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.372981
text:
  <kremlyn> I was in #atomicmpc, then I left because they are
  all gheybos (tm)
  <kremlyn> And he pm'd me and asked me to come back
  <kremlyn> So I said
  <kremlyn> [19:48] <kremlyn> Why? To watch a bunch of
  pre-pubescent CS playing    Overclockers talk about how much
  faster their computer is now that it's running at a 4 Mhz
  faster FSB, when for the amount of money they spent on a
  liquid-urine cooling system, they could have bought a faster
  box anyway?
  <kremlyn> And he quit


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911088
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.373051
text:
  <Shosuro> and you'd think if some people are going to give
  money as a present
  <Shosuro> (now, I'm not trying to sound ungrateful)
  <Shosuro> but they could at least keep it inline with
  inflation
  <Shosuro> instead of giving the same ammount for the last 10
  years
  <Shosuro> I mean, I know I could of bought a house with it
  back in "the day", but this wouldn't get me a bar of chocolate


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911089
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.373148
text:
  <RetardedCrow> Crap, I put the head phones in, and I here
  "Anal beads, whatever. Now you can get realistic animal
  genitals. How bout a kangaroo penis?"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911089
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.373239
text:
  <Confuzion> ok all females: 1) Get in fron of webcam 2) take
  off shirt 3) focus on boobies 4) *click* 5) /dccsend confuzion
  boobie.jpg 6) repeat process for bottom portion of body.
  *note* do not mix up steps please follow corect order. thank
  you.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911090
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.373289
text:
  * Nanobot primarily uses a pi-based counting system
  <Nanobot> I know all of the digits in pi
  <Nanobot> It's 10


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911090
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.373335
text:
  <HSOK> my dad just came up stairs, he said i was playing my
  music too loud
  <HSOK> im using headphones


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911090
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.373391
text:
  <orlando> There's no such thing as reverse racism; racism
  doesn't have a direction.
  <justin> So it's a scalar.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911091
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.373488
text:
  <Tsk> oiuyniyu98h987h89yh87y98yjn987j987y897yhkiuk;''''
  <Tsk> sorry.. there was a spider on my keyboard.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911091
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.373548
text:
  <DRLEGO> OH THAT FUCKING IDIOT
  <DRLEGO> my gf bought me a xmas gift
  <DRLEGO> off amazon
  <DRLEGO> but she used my account to do it
  <DRLEGO> so it charged ME
  <tuffguy> haha
  <tuffguy> owned


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911091
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.373597
text:
  *** KeeperX (KeeperX@24.120.83.177) has joined channel #idle
  <KeeperX>: ...
  <KeeperX>: Why isn't anyone talking?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911092
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.373664
text:
  <Oddlies> spawn killing is when you kill someone as they
  respawn you nub
  <Chimp> I do that in wolfenstein with the mortar
  <Oddlies> then you're a spawn kiling nub
  <Oddlies> :. sux
  <Oddlies> spawn killing is not cool D:
  <Chimp> They are liek: OMG YOU NUB! I HAT YOU! STOP IT PLESE.
  CAN YOU TEACH ME HOW TO SPAWN KILL?
  <Chimp> I only do it when I need the xp
  <Oddlies> that's like saying "I only rape toddlers when I need
  to get laid"
  <Oddlies> it doesn't make it cool


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911094
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.373804
text:
  <M07w> you haven't been on the internet until you've seen a
  disembodied breast wearing a pair of panties


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911094
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.373850
text:
  <Jedateach> anyone in here got a spare xtra dialup account I
  can use
  <_Godless_> lol. yeah ... sure ... no realy ... have my first
  born too while yer at it.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911095
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.373954
text:
  <Fogie> not a tivo, just a creative labs tv tuner card with
  tivo-like functionality
  <AlienCrimeSyndicate> if i had that card fogie, i would rip
  the trinity broadcasing network 24/7
  <Fogie> what is that, pr0n?
  <AlienCrimeSyndicate> if televangelists for jesus = pr0n, then
  yes
  <Fogie> to each his own
  <Fogie> somewhere in America a man is jerking off to jesus


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911095
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.374012
text:
  <Miss^Katie> whats the kinkiest thing you've ever done
  <rachhh> well before i had my first bisexual experience, i was
  smoking pot, and my boyfriend was licking me out and then he
  got my dog and my dog was licking me
  <Miss^Katie> what was that like?
  <rachhh> it was really good
  <rachhh> i dont think i would have done it if i knew about it
  though
  <rachhh> you ever done anything like that?
  <Miss^Katie> ummm not with animals


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911095
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.374066
text:
  <Tip|3dpong> I watched Real Sex once
  <Tip|3dpong> and these two hot lesbians were making out in a
  tub
  <Tip|3dpong> and I was fapping hardcore
  <Tip|3dpong> I was like "YA YA YA!"
  <Tip|3dpong> then they stood up and they both had huge penises


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911096
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.374172
text:
  <Vexer`> i'm arabic / muslim
  <Traktopel> im more muslim than you
  <Vexer`> you are?
  <Vexer`> YOU TERRORIST!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911096
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.374244
text:
  <X5> do what horny college idiot men do every night, hump park
  benches!
  <smackfoo> last time i humped a park bench i was late into my
  teens
  <smackfoo> it was a quiet, peaceful night in hyde park
  <smackfoo> the bums had all been incinerated in an unfortunate
  event with the department of water and power
  <smackfoo> i stepped up to a cute little wood number, couldn't
  have been older than 17
  <smackfoo> i rubbed her thighs...er...handles, and she cooed
  in the moonlight
  <smackfoo> fearing splinters, i gently waxed her humps, making
  sure to remove any hint of sharpness
  <smackfoo> slowly, gently, i removed my pants...
  <smackfoo> um
  <smackfoo> you guys know the rest
  <Cithorn> Keep going
  <Cithorn> I'm not done yet


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911096
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.374290
text:
  <Mr`Death> Hey Queued, know of an easy way to reduce speaker
  noise?
  <Boinger69> turn down the volume?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911097
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.374346
text:
  <Daniel> I am from Texas.
  <Daniel> I do not consider myself an American.
  <DragonAtma> That's okay
  <DragonAtma> As we wish texas wasn't part of the US


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911098
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.374592
text:
  <leokitty> ok who wants to come over and help me find all the
  underwear that i've scattered around my room? i need to get it
  all into the laundry bag.
  <DrTrevorkian> todd, you start searching.  i'll make the ebay
  seller account.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911098
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.374646
text:
  <doobie> where do you sickos get these fucking links
  <doobie> i mean seroiusly, do you type in
  <doobie> horribly disfigured penis into google?
  <Diablo> no
  <Diablo> actually i was searching for penises in mouse traps


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911099
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.374704
text:
  <piccchic4ever> oh boy
  <piccchic4ever> listen to some of the email's i got today
  <piccchic4ever> Lose weight with hypnosis!!
  <piccchic4ever> Get FREE Condoms, Lube, T-shirts and more!
  <piccchic4ever> why is tshirts in that sentence?
  <GoalMstr22> haha
  <GoalMstr22> to wipe yourself with


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911099
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.374795
text:
  <@Beebop> You know you're really addicted to CS when you stop
  masturbate cuz you think your neighbor has a wallhack


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911100
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.374937
text:
  *** devolve (corruptor@203-96-106-108.dialup.xtra.co.nz) has
  joined
  <devolve> what is the name of the sexual activity where you
  put a tube up each others ass and pass shit between it
  <aNuBiS-> devolve: Looking for something to do on a Saturday
  night in New Zealand?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911100
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.374987
text:
  Steal My Bagels: okay
  Steal My Bagels: amy
  amy did not say: okay
  amy did not say: mat
  Steal My Bagels: best friend to best friend here
  amy did not say: yes?
  Steal My Bagels: whats the key to scoring
  amy did not say: hahahaha
  Steal My Bagels: you know there's an actual way that will
  always work
  Steal My Bagels: but girls won't say
  Steal My Bagels: what is it?
  amy did not say: hmm
  amy did not say: well the way that will ALWAYS work involves
  drugs/alcohol
  amy did not say: hahaha
  Steal My Bagels: hahahah
  amy did not say: the other ones take time and lots of
  getting-to-know-you shit


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911101
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.375036
text:
  * Trog starts singing "My little pony, my little pony"
  * Mezir shoves a little pony up an orifice of Trog's choice
  <Trog> yours


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911101
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.375084
text:
  [+   oracel] my exam went well =)
  [@   zipper] My job searching didn't.
  [@   zipper] Going to go out with a friend and do a coop
  search wednesday. :o
  [@   zipper] Multiplayer job searching > Single player


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911101
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.375132
text:
  <kurtis> I love electronics, always have been a tinkerer of
  such things
  <kurtis> it all started when I was 7, and wired a train set
  directly to a wal socket...and shot the train through my
  bedroom wall
  <kurtis> suddenly I understood the difference from AC to DC
  heh


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911101
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.375186
text:
  <Sumez> there's no way a girl could ever imagine the pain of
  being hurt in the testicles
  <Mort-Hog> emma: The pain oozes up, and your ahems swell up to
  the size of pomigranits, your voice goes high and squeky, and
  your eye lids flicker.
  <MrCoulomb> I thought that's what happened when you get
  possesed by mickey mouse...


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911102
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.375232
text:
  <john-lennon-> how much does a new 2004 mustang go for?
  <Jonathan`> it goes for about 2 years then falls apart


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911102
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.375290
text:
  <boon> today started out so aweful
  <boon> I got up early, poured a bowl of cereal, OJ...I was
  set. Had 45min until I had to leave for work.  I thought I'd
  go downstairs and grab the laundry from the dryer before I
  started eating
  <boon> I get to the bottom of the stairs and *slam*...the door
  to my place closes behind me
  <boon> SCREWED
  <Kammo> oh, no! You had to open the door?!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911102
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.375343
text:
  <TonyD> you hatiater
  <DamianMor> What on earth is a hatiater?
  <TonyD> it's a word I just made up
  <TonyD> someone who radiates hate


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911102
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.375396
text:
  <@genutech> you know those trigun dvd rips i was getting
  <@genutech> there all dubbed
  * @genutech cries
  <@animaniac420> thats like wakin up cauz your gilrfriend shit
  in your bed
  <@genutech> dude, ani, you need to learn how to use better
  metaphors


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911103
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.375443
text:
  <@Stormrider> If I got arrested and had one phone call, I'd
  call the police station with a bomb scare


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911103
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.375560
text:
  <R36613> how is everyone tonight? Aside from being dead of
  course
  <Zealot-X> Yep, aside from that, I'm just peachy.
  <R36613> lol
  <Zealot-X> A little stiff, from rigor mortis and all.
  <R36613> O.o
  <Zealot-X> Erm wait.. that came out wrong..
  <Calren> I'm hungry and needy and want Freelancer to let me
  blow up a freaking starbase
  <Olanis> mmm rigor mortis
  <R36613> don't try to type too fast your fingers will fall off
  <R36613> they'll go snap crackle and pop
  <Zealot-X> Yeah.. better not accidentally look at porn..
  something else may fall off.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911104
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.375611
text:
  <jablowme> why do some people associate nerds with small
  cocks?
  <Jonny-TD> so girls wont like nerds.....duh
  <jablowme> those fucking fags.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911104
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.375662
text:
  <jstepka> perl is the kryptonite of the computer science world
  <pagan> if stepka looks at it his penis shrivles up
  <pagan> and he gets weak
  <pagan> =)
  <jstepka> hell yeah


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911104
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.375752
text:
  <MindGamez> omg that commercial would have been so funny if
  the little girl had asked santa for a 7 and a quarter inch
  penis instead of a stereo system or whatever


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911105
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.375798
text:
  (ginge): find 'bandages' when you have a dong, its dead good
  (ginge): dong? i meant chance
  (ginge): wtf is on my mind?!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911105
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.375852
text:
  <Cross> I was at the kareoke bar last night
  <Cross> and i was talking to this hot chick for like 20
  minutes
  <Cross> and this other girl walked over right in the middle of
  my conversation
  <Cross> and said "Are you talking to my sister? Cause she's
  deaf"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911106
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.375957
text:
  <Babyxic> have fun in ur wrestling outfit
  <KestrelM1> its not wrestling!
  <KestrelM1> its rowing!
  <KestrelM1> they're rowing troughs!
  <KestrelM1> and i dont grope other males
  <KestrelM1> just... long poles...


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911106
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.376016
text:
  <mightyflo> they need to make a car washing sim
  <nitrifik_> I'd play it.
  <FE2work> what r u a spic ?
  <blazemore> haha
  <blazemore> would you like to buy a vowel?
  <blazemore> or even a whole word


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911106
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.376059
text:
  þþ joins [THE_HAT (*!rapta@dp-3391.sc.rr.com)]
  [THE_HAT] Sup
  (dosdemon_) ...
  [THE_HAT] ...
  [THE_HAT] cant i just say sup?
  [THE_HAT] sup == whats up
  (dosdemon_) nuttin dawg sup wit choo chit nigga got any fly
  tip on ya.
  (dosdemon_) chit
  (dosdemon_) well slap muh fro
  [THE_HAT] lol
  (dosdemon_) dese honky muthafuckas aint nevah seen a 14 inch
  diack befoo
  (dosdemon_) chit
  [THE_HAT] nice little server you got going
  þþ parts [THE_HAT (*!rapta@dp-3391.sc.rr.com(THE_HAT))]
  (dosdemon_) straight up.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911106
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.376108
text:
  <Phillip`> i just had starbucks coffee
  <K_Russell> join #someonewhocares :(
  <Phillip`> no one is there :(


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911107
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.376159
text:
  <CogNiTO> us can suck meh balls
  <FlyingAttackPorcupine> .... no it doesnt
  <FlyingAttackPorcupine> no it cant, your balls are too small
  to be sucked on.... they could, however, be inhaled through a
  straw
  <CogNiTO> well
  <CogNiTO> do that then


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911107
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.376208
text:
  <Russell> he told me to max out the damn card, but I would
  have felt guilty as hell if I did, so I just ordered 5 games,
  an S-Video cable, memory card, LOTR extended version, 2 cable
  extensions, and B&W with expansion


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911107
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.376257
text:
  * Mapionetka then wonders what the hell he is going to do with
  his 32mb mem stick
  <ginji> stick it where the sun doesn't shine Mapionetka ?
  <Mapionetka> in my computer room?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911108
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.376307
text:
  <jim_the_hat> without programmers you would not be able to
  chat on irc 15 hours a day ally^ :P
  <ally^> i know
  <ally^> i could be doing something else
  <ally^> like sucking dick


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911108
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.376363
text:
  <ajax> Some people...have the idea that evolution is a fucking
  system of...
  <ajax> "oh i need flippers, i'd better grow some" type
  bullshit. :P
  <ajax> It's more like "Oh shit look at that freak over there
  with the flippers hahaha OH SHIT I AM DROWNING OH GOD SAVE ME
  FLIPPER BOY".


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911108
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.376418
text:
  <Andaru> I don't have any porno
  <Andaru> I don't particularly like porno either
  <LuCiPh33R> you're on the internet and you don't like porn?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911108
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.376470
text:
  <Fulgore> whats the complement to a 43 degree angle?
  <sparks> My you're looking "acute" today
  <Fulgore> fuck you


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911109
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.376515
text:
  <@God> keyweed, hah. i hate speaking in public :P
  < keyweed> God: that explains the past 2000 years.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911109
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.376611
text:
  <Ag3ntOrangE> I like that one song by Alice Deejay...
  <Ag3ntOrangE> except for the part that goes: "Do you think
  your better off alone?"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911110
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.376708
text:
  <humble> for every job there is an appropriate tool
  <anal-ease> that's what she told me
  <anal-ease> as she pulled out the 12" dildo


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911111
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.376902
text:
  <BeaVer> why does my wife have to work nights
  <BeaVer> :/
  <broken> because the milkman's wife works days
  <BeaVer> true
  <BeaVer> but all the strippers work at night as well
  <broken> hence the balance in the universe


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911111
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.377044
text:
  <Noctornus-> you know what they say about a guy with small
  hands......
  <+Anton> "He doesn't have big hands"?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911112
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.377105
text:
  <HumanHead> :/
  <HumanHead> I tried to pull a drew at Video Warehouse
  <HumanHead> <me> Do you have any job openings?
  <HumanHead> <guy> no positions are open right now
  <HumanHead> <me> that only means one thing...SOMEONE MUST DIE
  <HumanHead> *me is asked to leave


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911112
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.377210
text:
  <krayons> 95% of the girls at rutgers university in new jersey
  <krayons> have stds
  <killspree> haha
  <killspree> no way
  <kara> bullshit man
  <killspree> no wonder their basketball and football teams suck
  so bad
  <krayons> its not bullshit
  <VeRrUcKt> lol
  <killspree> the players are running around in pain


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911113
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.377257
text:
  genjer: so my sister asks me if this shirt makes her look fat
  genjer: and I was like, "no the fat underneath does"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911113
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.377358
text:
  <SmokingCats> well, it's official, I've eaten so much turkey,
  I have feathers coming out of my butt
  <Daedalus> you're not supposed to eat the feathers
  <SmokingCats> o
  <SmokingCats> damnit


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911114
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.377494
text:
  halfbakedbuzzard: ahah, my next door neighbors house is on
  fire
  halfbakedbuzzard: brb, gotta get the camera


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911114
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.377622
text:
  <EggTrivia>  &#8221; What is the title of the 1996 sequel to
  "Terms of Endearment"? &#8221;
  <TMF> terms of endearment II
  <TrueChaos> er no
  <TrueChaos> not that easy
  <Tags|Sue> lol
  <TrueChaos> terms of endearment 2
  <el_presidente> the return of the terms of endearment
  <TrueChaos> terms of endearment: 2
  <TMF> !!hint
  <TrueChaos> yay
  <Tags|Sue> Terms of Endearment: The Revenge
  <TMF> the morning star
  <EggTrivia> TMF answered « the morning star » in 37 seconds
  and was absolutely CORRECT!!!
  <EggTrivia> Next question in 20 seconds, get ready!
  <el_presidente> lol
  <TrueChaos> attack of the terms of endearment


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911115
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.377680
text:
  <Tribespr0n> oh wait
  <Tribespr0n> i have an 80 gig drive full of porn
  <Tribespr0n> i need to hook that up
  <Tribespr0n> Dude at work, brought in an 80 gig drive full of
  asian porn
  <Tribespr0n ok
  <Tribespr0n> wtf
  <Tribespr0n> this drive is part of a raid array


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911115
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.377773
text:
  <+MrKite> I remember one of my teachers, she was a female
  teacher, and it was hawaiian week and she had too lais around
  her neck. Eric said to her "I see you got laid over the
  weekend" which instantly made me think he was going to have
  problems, she casually responded "Yeah, twice"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911115
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.377816
text:
  * Marilyn-Manson anyone want to chat? i am 17 years old from
  wales i am gothic, i am a cousin of Kelly Jones of the
  stereophonics, but they fucking suck, so dont talk to me about
  them, i also have MSN


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911116
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.377858
text:
  phoenix8634: are you legally downloading music yet or no?
  TwiztidTown: ROFL
  TwiztidTown: what is that?
  phoenix8634: k ill take that as a no
  TwiztidTown: you can LEGALLY DOWNLOAD MUSIC?
  TwiztidTown: LOL AND ALL THIS TIME I WAS DOING IT FOR FREE


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911116
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.377924
text:
  <prepared>Theorem: All numbers are equal.
  <prepared>Proof: Choose arbitrary a and b, and let t = a + b.
  Then
  <prepared>a + b = t
  <prepared>(a + b)(a - b) = t(a - b)
  <prepared>a^2 - b^2 = ta - tb
  <prepared>a^2 - ta = b^2 - tb
  <prepared>a^2 - ta + (t^2)/4 = b^2 - tb + (t^2)/4
  <prepared>(a - t/2)^2 = (b - t/2)^2
  <prepared>a - t/2 = b - t/2
  <prepared>a = b
  <prepared>So all numbers are the same, and math is pointless.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911116
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.377966
text:
  n e r d b 5: DUDE
  n e r d b 5: shania twain is only 20 years older than me.... i
  might have a chance one day, since she isnt that much older
  than me


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911117
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.378020
text:
  <SorcererX> Dispatched on March 21, 2004  Delivery estimate:
  Mar 19, 2004 - Mar 22, 2004
  <SorcererX> now... I've seen inaccurate estimates before...
  but this takes the cake
  <SorcererX> "we assume that it'll arrive two days ago or in
  the next 12 hrs... and the package has to go 2000 km"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911117
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.378079
text:
  <MntLKeY> heh, i made up 'heh'
  <Amanda`> That's a pretty outrageous claim.
  <MntLKeY> i've being sayin it since 96


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911118
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.378145
text:
  <Annieland> i have beautiful skin
  <Annieland> some people are just jealous
  <rajn> no you don't
  <rajn> you're fucking ugly
  <Annieland> i do too
  <Annieland> fuck you
  <Annieland> i'm beautiful
  <rajn> fuck you
  <rajn> get hepatitis


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911119
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.378249
text:
  <stig> LCST: do you have a crack?
  <LCST> sure i do
  <LCST> |     |
  <LCST> |( . )|
  <LCST> |  |  |
  <LCST> |__|__|
  <stig> lol
  <stig> um.. i mean for SecureCRT


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911119
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.378301
text:
  <JPMorgan> sup chris
  <XulChris> just lovin' my awesome redhat8 os
  <dann> what do you usually do under linux?
  <XulChris> idle on irc


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911119
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.378366
text:
  < uidzero> This dewd wanted me to host his site for him one
  time. So I checked things out and "whois"ed his domain and
  etc. I wanted to make sure he was legit. So I called the
  number and he mom and answered. "Can I talk to so-and-so? She
  replied, "You sound to old to be calling my son.", "Well ma
  `am, your son wants me to host his site, so I was calling to
  make sure it was.." <pause> <pause> "hold on..." (In the back
  ground I heard her yelling at him for being on the computer
  after 8 and he started crying.) <click>.. Next day, I get /msg
  "Thanks a f**king lot, she took the computer and found
  all of my videos, I'm grounded forever.... "Quits:".


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911120
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.378510
text:
  <N|O_r0x0rs_my_b0x0rs> then you have to copy the file
  'terraincd.dat' and the file blah balh to c: root or whatever
  <N|O_r0x0rs_my_b0x0rs> whats that mean
  <N|O_r0x0rs_my_b0x0rs> whats the hell is a root


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911121
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.378645
text:
  * semi realises that  my videocard is better then MrP-'s old
  computer
  <MrP-> hell, i masturbate at a higher frequency than my old pc


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911121
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.378723
text:
  <sup3rh3r0> kali: give me your user name and password and I'll
  test it
  <kali> yes, that's what it is!
  <kali> supadupakali, surge
  <sup3rh3r0> (email address censored)
  <tima> heh
  <sadielady> haha
  <WhtCastle> heh
  <p3t3_> hehe
  <zombidwee> hahahaha
  <zombidwee> mwahahhahah
  <tima> smrt
  <Valandra> whoops
  <kali> uh, that's probably bad to say since surge is like my
  password for everything, huh
  <WhtCastle> LOL
  <Tony> hah
  <p3t3_> HAHAH


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911122
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.378769
text:
  killjay: Most embarassing internet moment?
  killjay: Unknowingly cyber with a dude?
  lemonlimeskull: Nope.
  killjay: Knowingly cyber with a dude?
  lemonlimeskull: Not as such.
  lemonlimeskull: Though when I was a kid, I did try to run an
  ASCII image of a naked chick through a text-to-speech program,
  set to female voice.
  lemonlimeskull: When she got to "colon colon colon period
  colon colon colon period period" the moment was gone.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911122
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.378820
text:
  <phats> damnit, now that I'm checking my mail pretty often I'm
  not getting any
  <phats> heh
  <phats> mail that is


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911122
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.378863
text:
  (@damned) one time, my mom asked me if she copied something,
  and then unplugged the mouse and plugged it into another
  computer she could paste it


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911123
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.378910
text:
  (fishead) "I fucked your girlfriend and all I got was this
  lousy t-shirt... and crabs"
  (TwinX) " I got a handjob from Cunty McChicken and then he
  made me BUY this fuckin t-shirt."


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911123
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.378965
text:
  <[PLF]TehKirby> in canada; if you rape a dog
  <[PLF]TehKirby> they give you money
  <[PLF]Sohryu> shit
  <[PLF]TehKirby> im serious.
  <[PLF]Sohryu> jesus
  <[PLF]Sohryu> id be rich


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911123
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.379073
text:
  <cjr> My dad was in Edinburgh on holiday, and he was walking
  around a street with lots of expensive restaurants
  <cjr> And there was a homeless guy selling magazines at the
  corner
  <cjr> So he bought one, and had a chat
  <cjr> Then he asked "Do you know any good restaurants around
  here?"
  <cjr> The homeless guy just stares at him for about ten
  seconds and says "Yeah, I don't really eat out very often...
  but I'd imagine they are all pretty good"
  <cjr> I think my dad ran away after that


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911124
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.379135
text:
  <Shameful_Buffalo> I got bored tonight, so I played the wal
  mart game, you know where you go to wal mart and see who can
  get the funniest items together
  <Shameful_Buffalo> well I give my friends ryan and taylor $20
  and they go off, taylor gets KY Jelly, Camoflauge shorts and
  Predator on DVD, I get some G2 Pilot pens, A mountain dew,
  Murray's Superior Afroshine Hair Pomade, 12-pack of Lubed
  Trojans, a pair of Brinks Luggage Locks with keys, Electrical
  Tape, and some Reeses Peanut Butter Cups (standard double-cup
  pack).
  <Shameful_Buffalo> Ryan comes back empty handed and this
  follows,
  Ryan: "I played your game dude..."
  Taylor: "then where is your stuff?"
  Me: "Yeah, you had to buy something with that 20 I gave
  you.."
  Ryan "I went to automotive and put a tire on layaway..."
  <Shameful_Buffalo> I never laughed so hard in my entire life,
  I gave him the 10 bucks for winning and walked to the car with
  my bag of crap.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911124
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.379185
text:
  <timovgod> Q: How many perverts does it take to put in a light
  bulb?
  <timovgod> A: Just one, but it takes the entire emergency room
  to get it out.
  <enaz> did your insurance cover it timovgod?
  <timovgod> My car insurance covered it, I said I had I broken
  tail light.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911125
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.379288
text:
  <Xyonz> there are gay girls in my class that use me to get
  porn for them
  <Xyonz> which i find amusing
  <Xyonz> since i hardly look at porn
  <Xyonz> :
  <_rb> are they hot?
  <Xyonz> not by most people's standards, but i'd say they are


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911126
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.379482
text:
  <Ron> Not all those tricks are that amazing.
  <Lance> Hey, if a dog can get a server up in Korea before it
  gets eaten, I'd give that a 9.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911126
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.379534
text:
  <MiakaYuki> Chillicha- you'd be better off finding a nice girl
  to ride, wouldn't you?
  <chillicha> i am a girl
  <MiakaYuki> Exactly.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911126
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.379575
text:
  Ron34: Why havent you been in school?
  Joe: because its summer vacation?
  Ron34:  its sept 13
  Ron34: school started the 5th
  Joe: WTF
  Joe: ITS SEPTEMBER?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911127
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.379630
text:
  <GothYena> I have a brother who breeds wolves in Alabama.
  <RosenOttr> breeds them, or with them?
  <|Wolf|> :D
  <GothYena> I'll assume both.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911127
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.379684
text:
  <deimos> what are you installing?
  <hep> your mom
  <hep> YourMom v.2.4.5
  <deimos> wow
  <deimos> yourmom kept panicing on me
  <hep> she does that deimos


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911127
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.379734
text:
  *** BlackNet21 (BlackNet@66.0.92.223) has joined #photography
  <BlackNet21> anyone here wanna help me with a photo?
  <pd_corax> A what?
  <danno> wtf is a photo
  *** BlackNet21 (BlackNet@66.0.92.223) has left #photography
  <danno> sheesh, it takes all kinds...


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911128
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.379779
text:
  (datacide) i just pissed out of the porch door and didn't
  notice the bitch from next door watching me :/


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911128
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.379823
text:
  * FiShYmAn kills Noddy
  * FiShYmAn sells the film to ld saying its olsen twins for $50
  [Noddy ] rfol
  [Noddy ] he'd get off on it either way


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911128
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.379871
text:
  <Teromen> but have you ever tried doing it to a goat? they
  look really soft
  <Teromen> erm, wrong window :|


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911128
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.379927
text:
  <@dum|work> he's actually quite likeable in RL
  <@dum|work> its just when he gets behind an irc session he
  becomes Bitter-man
  <@dum|work> a strange visitor from another planet, zapping the
  denizens of IRC with his Bittero rays
  <@acme> he's got a Bitter-man cape and tights and everything
  <@dum|work> the tights are just a recreational thing


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911129
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.379976
text:
  <[ryan]WIN> i should go up to like
  <[ryan]WIN> the special ed class
  <[ryan]WIN> and find one of those hot retards
  <[ryan]WIN> cuz involuntary drooling makes for good oral


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911129
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.380032
text:
  [anigirl82] my friend found out he was allergic to latex the
  first time he had sex
  [Sil<3rium] o.o
  [anigirl82] it sucked because he had been with his girl for
  like 3 years..and they had been waiting
  [Sil<3rium] oh noo
  [Urbal T] that is...wrongery
  [Sil<3rium] yeeeeeeees
  [blue><3dge] talk about a night he'll never forget! hahahah!
  ... ha... ha... ow...
  [blue><3dge] that poor man's wang


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911129
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.380081
text:
  <Calculus> ...YE GODS I have too many DVDs.
  <Calculus> ...how do I have so many DVDs and so little money?
  <Zibblsnrt> possibly because you have so many DVDs? *ducks*


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911130
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.380126
text:
  (sh) i leave for two minutes and you guys are estimating the
  ejaculatory capacity of young boy's digestive systems


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911130
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.380218
text:
  TheElevatorMan: That's the joy of Linux. You scream in pain
  and agony the first time you do it, and then it's not so bad
  every time after that.
  TheElevatorMan: Geeze, it just sounded like I was describing
  some sex act. :P


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911131
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.380317
text:
  <swesticles> OK, I fixed my match.com profile. Sadly, I'll
  still be a gay man with a nice butt that likes kittens for
  24-72 hours until my new profile is approved :(
  <Psion> what?
  <swesticles> I changed my password, too, so whatever assfuck
  hacked my account can suck my dick.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911131
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.380368
text:
  <gloone> and they go "hey, you can have fun without chicks you
  know.."
  <gloone> i don't wanna get drunk if there's no chicks around..


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911131
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.380427
text:
  <@Koru> I have a project due for school.
  <@Koru> I have to make a collage about my mind body and soul,
  then explain it.
  <hack||SAMA> Just post hentai and ecchi all over it, and say
  this...
  <hack||SAMA> "As for mind, i really like Hentai, or 'Cartoon
  Porn'. Body is mainly about fapping ot that hentai, or
  'Cartoon Porn'. and lastly, Soul. My soul is about finding a
  girl that loves me for who i am, a hentai-loving fruit."


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911132
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.380613
text:
  (+Cafe`) I am into AZN GANGSTAS
  (tehjeebus|x) gangstas that can do math... that means they're
  the worst people to buy crack from


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911133
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.380717
text:
  <spd_dmn> theres a fucking .doc
  <spd_dmn> read it?
  <WillaCuz> reading is for faggots
  <pagan> spoken like a true black man WillaCuz


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911133
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.380794
text:
  <@jaffy> how the fuck does my moniter get so dirty, its like
  some cunt eats his meals off it while im asleep


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911134
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.380838
text:
  doubting: interesting
  doubting: popup ad suggests I use www.blackjack.com to backup
  my critical data
  doubting: strangely, I'm not wont to gamble with my backups


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911134
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.380941
text:
  < Alkivar> we're on our way back from partying in NYC over the
  weekend ... it was like sunday afternoon we're headed back
  west
  < Alkivar> we're cruisin... maybe 130-140mph
  < Alkivar> flew past a trooper on the side of the road
  < Alkivar> trooper lights up ... siren blasting ... chasing us
  down the highway
  < Alkivar> we're both like should we stop ... there's no way
  he can catch up to us
  < Alkivar> we decided to be good and stop
  < Alkivar> cop catches up to us ... comes out gun drawn ...
  pissed as hell
  < Alkivar> walks up to the side of the car and goes
  < Alkivar> "SON CAN I SEE YOUR PILOT'S LICENSE"
  < Alkivar> Jason pulls out his fucking pilot's license
  < Alkivar> cop's jaw hits the fucking ground
  < Alkivar> most stunned face I've ever fucking seen
  < Alkivar> in this practically a whimper goes "get the fuck
  out of here"
  < Alkivar> no ticket... too embarassed apparently
  < Alkivar> I'll never forget that day long as I live
  < Alkivar> I was sure we were goin to jail


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911134
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.380990
text:
  <Ghormak> I'm going to make a GTA3 mod. If you drive more than
  88 in a delorian, you end up in GTA:VC


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911134
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.381038
text:
  * DAEMON watches the most expensive videos on mtv
  <SkiTz> the most expensive is bound to be a Michael Jackson
  clip.
  <DAEMON> it costs a lot to buy small children on the black
  market for his dressing room


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911135
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.381085
text:
  lonelychic0190: WHY DO BOYS LIKE RECIEIVING ORAL BUT THEY DONT
  LIKE GIVING GIRL ORAL
  Goat Desecration: BECAUSE WOMEN CAN'T TALK WITH A DICK IN
  THEIR MOUTH


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911135
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.381152
text:
  <Tomasu> !calc 2**64
  <Mossie> calc, result '1.84467440737096e+19'
  <Tomasu> !calc 2**128
  <Mossie> calc, result '3.40282366920938e+38'
  <entheh> !calc meow
  <Mossie> calc, error 'Bareword "meow" not allowed while
  "strict subs" in use at (eval 15) line 1, <GEN0> line 66.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911135
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.381208
text:
  <Capt_Suicide> god fucking damnit
  <Capt_Suicide> my sister puked all over my toilet
  <Capt_Suicide> i just fucking cleaned that thing earlier from
  where nathan shit all over it
  <Capt_Suicide> good thing i bought that toilet bowl cleaner
  today
  <Kornered> what a rediculous thing to waste your money on
  <FaQz0r> get a dog
  <FaQz0r> dogs clean everything


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911136
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.381256
text:
  <Professor> I got a phone call asking for the Gay Homofag at
  work today.
  <Professor> Surprisingly, I forwarded it to the right person.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911136
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.381299
text:
  Trex: I like my women like I like my cars!
  Prometheus: Expensive?
  Dromiceiomimus: Foreign?
  Epi: Um... revved up?
  Crow: Fast?
  Brex: low-maintenance with a wide tailpipe?
  Dromiceiomimus: Freshly waxed, with a GPS tracking system?
  Lorn: Trex, this is insanely sexist! Besides, I like my women
  like I like my databases.
  Trex: Managable?
  Lorn: Corrupted!
  Trex: ...
  Trex: No fucking comment.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911136
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.381352
text:
  «BoneyCork» ok heres a foolproof plan to get a girl
  «BoneyCork» rummage around for 5 minutes, turn to a girl,
  smile and say" excuse me, have you got a pen i can borrow?"
  «Dilbert|Simpsons» or pull out your penis and say "i'm horny
  bitch, suck my cock"
  «_404NotFound» ha
  «_404NotFound» ahh.. the direct approach
  «BoneyCork» ive never tried that one
  «BoneyCork» maybe i should sometime
  «Dilbert|Simpsons» yeah
  «Dilbert|Simpsons» i've done it millions of times
  «Dilbert|Simpsons» its bound to work sooner or later


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911136
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.381423
text:
  <Steve> http://www.cnn.com/2002/WORLD/asiapcf/east/12/14/
  korea.nukes/index.html
  <Jsangspar> I swear to god, CNN and the government are making
  everything up
  <Jsangspar> and it's starting to fall apart
  <Jsangspar> 'The Yongbyon nuclear facility in North Korea.
  Pyongyang says it will restart the nuclear reactor there '
  <Jsangspar> "YONGBYON"? "PYONGYANG"? Now they're just making
  fun of asian people
  <Steve> "Neighbor and potential threat FLIEDLICE has
  threatened to destroy any troops coming through their
  territory, be it from the western YELLOWSKIN or the east's
  SLANTEYEBASTIDS."
  <Jsangspar> gahahah


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911137
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.381516
text:
  <Squidwerd> *sings* Ooooooooo-oh
  supersadomasochistinecrobestiality, it's when you get a
  hard-on making Lassie a fatality!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911137
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.381627
text:
  <revolver> "whatevah, whatevah, it's mah hot body and ah'll do
  what ah want."
  <DirtyPunk> revolver: Until you're in prison with a man bigger
  than you.
  <DirtyPunk> ;)
  <revolver> d'oh


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911138
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.381679
text:
  <Murder-Is-Funny> I know this girl who is supposedly kinda
  anti-social - so she says - and she's mentioned she doesnt go
  many places or have many friends.. - but when I call her,
  she's never home - whats that mean?
  <Byte^> she has caller-id


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911138
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.381735
text:
  <nylint> a pedophile and a little girl were walking into the
  woods
  <nylint> and the little girl said 'these woods are scary at
  night, mister'
  <nylint> and the pedophile said 'you're scared?  i have to
  walk back alone!'


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911138
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.381776
text:
  soulmata: i wish i could get rid of my nuthair permanently
  Caffeine_: get the laser hair removal
  soulmata: sure lets point a laser at my cock


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911139
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.381834
text:
  <pHluid-> And that theoretical cap of 12k/sec, I've never seen
  it. 8k/sec is the tops I ever saw moving text around, except
  for that one mystical time when the moon was aligned properly.
  :
  <Tom> sometimes if I drink goats blood thats still warm and
  cut fresh from the goat I get 800k/s
  <datacide> i have sacrificed virgins and managed an extra 0.1
  kb/s
  <datacide> in the end i decided it is better to defile them
  <datacide> gives you more on the long run
  <pHluid-> datacide: That's because virgins create line noise.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911139
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.381879
text:
  <[K]orangeboy> nah, i live in wales, which is like the dirty
  retarded cousin that lives chained in the basement of the uk


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911139
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.381920
text:
  pinano: The angle of the dangle is directly proportional to
  the
  pinano: heat of the meat, as augmented by the thrust of the
  bust,
  pinano: and inversely so to the mass of the ass, so long as
  the
  pinano: bore of the whore remains constant.
  pinano: God, I love being an engineer.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911140
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.382066
text:
  <kyle> I'm trying to get this girl to go out with me but every
  pick up line i use sucks.
  <kolby> next time you see her, ask her what the difference is
  between a pile of dead babies and a BMW
  <kolby> then tell her that you don't have a BMW in your garage


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911140
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.382116
text:
  <MEEPY> COULD SOMEBODY HELP ME!? I WANT TO PLAY DOOM2 OVER
  NETSCAPE, BUT CAN'T FIGURE IT OUT. I LOAD THE IDSOFTWARE SITE
  IN NETSCAPE , THEN START DOOM2 AND JOIN A MAP BUT I NEVER SEE
  ANY PLAYERS? IS IT JUST THAT THEY ALL LOOK LIKE MONSTERS? IF
  THAT'S THE CASE, I THINK I'M REALLY GOOD!!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911140
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.382160
text:
  <shadyk> i think ill go insert some animals in my rectum and
  drink some of my own urine and take the purity test again


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911141
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.382216
text:
  <Brian_Davion> whats a good colour for a protocal droid?
  <Brian_Davion> kaiser: I'm thinking a droid just like C3P0
  <KaiserPanda> make it black with inlaid gold leaf designs, and
  a funny hat
  <KaiserPanda> and a pink lawn flamingo
  <Wolf> yes, and its opening line would be "I am cornholio,
  human-cornhole relations"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911141
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.382263
text:
  * EddieCoon mashes his hands against the keyboard idly.
  <EddieCoon> Wow! What're the chances that that would come out
  from mashing my hands against the keyboard!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911141
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.382357
text:
  <Goldmoon> its amazing what you can get with batting your
  eyelashes and showing your tits.. lol
  <n0nthing> raped?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911142
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.382409
text:
  <AL9000> Hey, somebody try this, sit on your hands for a
  really long time until you have no feeling in them at all,
  then jack off, it's supposed to feel like you're getting a
  handjob from somebody else
  <Tip> I prefer sitting on my penis for like 5 minutes and then
  jacking off, it feels like I'm giving someone else a handjob


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911142
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.382470
text:
  <DAWg> AHHHHH!!!! hjorten kill my teacher....today's lesson is
  a intro to windows 2000
  <DAWg> "this is a mouse"
  <Hjorten> haha
  <DAWg> "this is a monitor"
  <DAWg> "ctrl+c copies"
  <DAWg> fucking christ


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911142
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.382525
text:
  < ryll > "putting the 'fun' back into fundamentalism, and the
  'laughter' back into sectarian slaughter"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911145
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.382709
text:
  <rocksicle> You know you use computers too much when your
  doing something in real life, make a mistake, and try to press
  ctrl-z.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911145
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.382761
text:
  <xcham> what I love is how leonardo never manages to stab
  anyone.
  <grassmunk> so you believe the part about fucking turtles
  living on pizza and standing 5 feet tall but the guy with
  swords doesnt stab anyone and it ruins the realite for you
  <grassmunk> heh
  <Kris> lol


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911145
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.382812
text:
  <Ryudo> java, the slower of the bunch
  <Ryudo> aol, the ones tossed down the stairs when they were 3
  <Ryudo> and java aol'ers...the bane of society


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911145
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.382876
text:
  <[ric]> jeez... why is it the boss always walks in on me when
  I am typing
  on irc?
  <[ric]> oh, yeh.. it's because I am always typing on irc.. :)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911146
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.382930
text:
  <Grey> I downloaded an ISO image of a game which turned out to
  be porn...
  <Grey> people don't respect anything anymore
  <Borlath_Mon> I downloaded Sid Meier's Alpha Centauri, and
  sadly, it turned out to be Sid Meier's Alpha Centauri.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911146
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.383003
text:
  <David> topic lock off ?
  <David> how
  <David> ?
  <DJ-Pyro> /msg chanserv help
  <SSJ4xVegeta> how do i group my nicks 2gether
  <DJ-Pyro> /msg nickserv help
  <DJ-Pyro> you'll notice a pattern


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911146
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.383057
text:
  (peregrine): you know
  (peregrine): if i ever setup an fserv
  (peregrine): i should make my trigger the destructicon
  (Chimerasame): i'm amused by people whose triggers are like
  *** Chimerasame has quit IRC (Quit: I AM A FAGGOT)
  *** Chimerasame (chime@resnet-46-92.dorm.utexas.edu) has
  joined #rpgamer2
  *** ChanServ sets mode: +o Chimerasame
  (xeria): <people in chim's other channels> really?
  (Breianna): WTF is that
  (peregrine): i'm really not sure
  (Chimerasame): ok, chalk one up for the dumbest thing i've
  done, ever
  (Ultimate_Houseplant): dumbass!
  *** Chimerasame has quit IRC (Quit: ignore that quit message)
  *** Chimerasame (chime@resnet-46-92.dorm.utexas.edu) has
  joined #rpgamer2
  *** ChanServ sets mode: +o Chimerasame


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911147
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.383105
text:
  <orb2k> raves are just an excuse
  <jovana> for what?
  <orb2k> for grinding my teeth and petting everything


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911147
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.383153
text:
  <dreamwraith> Girls that think oral sex isn't really sex are
  so fucked in the head.
  <Dest> dreamwraith: Literally.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911147
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.383200
text:
  hijak231: $795
  hijak231: for a 1 meter long CABLE
  hijak231: A PIECE OF WIRE
  Kesk2501: Does it have a red "R" printed on it or something?
  Kesk2501: Because Type "R" wire is faster.
  hijak231: it must...i hope it fucking came with a fucking
  computer


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911147
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.383247
text:
  * Joins: dad (dad@h00a0ccd3e0a3.ne.client2.attbi.com)
  <@tatpoop> Hi dad.
  <@tatpoop> Quit hitting mommy. ;_;
  <@tatpoop> OH GOD MEMORIES


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911148
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.383295
text:
  <infra> read the freebsd handbook
  <infra> then read it again
  <phaze> then burn it and shoot yoruself


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911148
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.383343
text:
  <FreshBrew> niggers are good, but you cant leave fried chicken
  lying around, or watermelon. they'll snap it up like a
  fucking.... nigger or something.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911149
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.383442
text:
  <klafka4> i actually am sick
  <klafka4> i think it's allergy
  <AlbinoSqrl> to real life?
  <klafka4> what? real life is great i've got my fantasy and
  scifi books, my anime, my tv!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911149
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.383536
text:
  <depresso> *** Notice -- K-line active for AllYour
  <depresso> *** Notice -- K-line active for BaseAre
  <depresso> *** Notice -- K-line active for Belong2Us
  * depresso falls over
  <depresso> those were actual klines that just poped up on my
  screen


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911149
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.383591
text:
  <Naivete> damnit whenever I see the word 'mount' in linux
  documentation I think UNF
  <Vertinox> "...Take hard drive, lube it with proper amounts of
  kY..."


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911150
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.383636
text:
  <merk> never make a comment to your friend that a mentally
  challenged person in a wheelchair is getting more action than
  him


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911150
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.383684
text:
  <Viscant> cockblock (COK'blok) n. 1. to stop in the sexual
  escapading by another willfully and wantonly. 2. to deflect
  the cock "viscant was eyeing ricky ortiz lustily until arturo
  cockblocked him"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911150
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.383736
text:
  <bi0cide> this is rad
  <bi0cide> its erotic magnetic poetry
  <bi0cide> im getting off just reading the words
  <bi0cide> errr
  <bi0cide> :|


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911151
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.383859
text:
  <Sam>: So, that £5 gorgeous sketchbook I bought today? I sit
  down to do the first page thinking "Oh wow, this is gonna be
  awesome - I'm gonna fill it with great drawings and keep it
  forever" and all that shit.
  <Sam>: Open the book, thick black ink pen in hand and say
  "Right, what shall I put on the first page?... Hm, a nice
  "SKETCHBOOK" with doodles around will do while I wait for
  inspiration"
  <Sam>: I get to "SKETH" and realise I've missed out a C
  <Sam>: My heart stops - my lip trembles... Do I rip out the
  page? No! I'll improvise - I'll turn that C into a H with
  stripes! Yeah, that works.
  <Sam>: Okay, now I can carry on
  <Sam>: I finish writing it and have a look at my handiwork
  <Sam>: and then I see it
  <Sam>: "SKETCBOOK"
  <Sam>: Fuck


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911151
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.383902
text:
  Nezzie:  dude
  Nezzie:  this is not cool
  Nezzie:  my dealer/cousin got busted
  Nezzie:  with fucking 5 pounds + intent to sell
  Nezzie:  thats up to 48 years and prison
  Nezzie:  A FEDERAL prision
  Nezzie:  a federal-pound-me-in-the-ass prison
  Nezzie:  and now i dont have a good dealer.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911152
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.384051
text:
  <STEELE1381> I just spent about 10 minutes taking an online IQ
  test that popped up onto my screen.
  <STEELE1381> Then, when I was finished, they made me fill out
  all this registration stuff before giving me my score.
  <sirhc614> How'd you do?
  <STEELE1381> Judging by the fact that I game them my email
  address to find out a number representing my intelligence that
  they semi-randomly calculated, I think I failed.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911152
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.384096
text:
  Hyp3rHax0r: they say office romances never work out
  Hyp3rHax0r: they're probably right
  Hyp3rHax0r: what kind of weirdo falls in love with an office?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911153
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.384146
text:
  < Wombles> i rang up a taxi friday... drunk.. and in in a
  pirate accent.. i said "Yarr ahoy me maitie! i need me a row
  boat to take me back to me ship which is docked at <insert
  address>"
  < Wombles> i can believe one came.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911153
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.384192
text:
  strummer126: Fucking asshole said this was going to be a video
  of an elephant sticking it's trunk up a rhino's asshole.
  Fucking Rickrolled again today. fuck this shit.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911153
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.384243
text:
  <Kalthare> Dammit, I'm losing my stack pointer somewhere in
  fat_mount(). :(
  <Quazgaa> Kalthare: sounds like a bad date


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911153
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.384303
text:
  <Jarik_Tentsu> Gah, I just snorted while laughing.
  <Jarik_Tentsu> And I have a cold.
  <Jarik_Tentsu> Urgh, this is disgusting.
  <Jarik_Tentsu> Luckily, it missed my girlfriend - they're hard
  to clean.
  <Jarik_Tentsu> err...
  <Jarik_Tentsu> *girlfriend = keyboard.
  <Jarik_Tentsu> O_O


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911154
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.384372
text:
  <Jamie_M> when I was 9 years old
  <Jamie_M> I called this girl on the phone and I go "I like
  you"
  <Jamie_M> and she goes "so?"
  <Jamie_M> I was like ":("
  <Jamie_M> then in that same year
  <Jamie_M> it was grade 4
  <Jamie_M> i think
  <Jamie_M> I liked another girl
  <Jamie_M> and I gave her one of those candy grams as a secret
  admirer
  <Jamie_M> and she ran out of the class crying


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911154
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.384426
text:
  <@sed> somebody tell me what i'm forgetting to save before i
  reinstall windows
  <+nimper> porn
  <@Jagfire> sed, porn
  <+Sabby> porn


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911155
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.384561
text:
  <[PhReAk]> i have a problem, i have an +++ATH0 modem bomber
  but when i use it it disconnects me from the internet, what is
  the problem?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911155
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.384609
text:
  <phr0work> redhat really fucked you in the ass
  <`KArmA> not yet it hasn't, but its definitely giving me a bit
  of a rimjob and whispering it suggestively


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911155
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.384658
text:
  <|nqbuss> i have no problem deciding what to do. if i'm
  hungry, i eat. if i'm tired, i sleep, if i need to user the
  bathroom, i use the bathroom, if none of the above, i sit in
  front of the computer


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911156
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.384717
text:
  <Vertinox> idiocy is relative
  <Vertinox> in fact your an idiot next to some one else
  <Vertinox> everyone has some one superior
  <Vertinox> in some way
  <Joe_> What about the guy who is the best?
  <Joe_> Who is his superior?
  <PyroRaven> That would be me


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911156
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.384810
text:
  <marcus> can you make a cisco route packets based on their
  source address?
  <Jon2> marcus: yes.  policy-based routing
  <FlashMan> marcus - yes, using policy routing
  <RoadRuner> marcus: yes. policy routing
  <marcus> anyone else?
  <drifter-> marcus: yes. policy routing


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911156
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.384865
text:
  <iKon> it's like they took my buying habits and offered me the
  exact opposite of everything i've ever purchased
  <Queued-S> What, they're offering you heterosexual literature
  without pictures?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911157
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.384918
text:
  <Phylitsa> Woo hoo! One girl and 7 unidle guys!
  <Phylitsa> Lets play "Spin the Attention Whore"
  <Novasol> Sounds like a gangbang waiting to happen


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911157
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.384980
text:
  <Twingy> but I don't see the reason for sending so many troops
  over when they can do it autonomously
  <DooD> because
  <DooD> the troops are bored
  <DooD> we gotta let them out to rape a third world country
  every once in a while
  <Twingy> seriously, I'm beginning to think so
  <skymoosUK> sick DooD
  <DooD> i meant rape in a figurative
  drop-bombs-on-your-ass-and-piss-on-your-corpse sense.
  <skymoosUK> oh, thats okay then, i thought you meant sexual
  and stuff


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911157
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.385032
text:
  <tabooli> A drunken friend recently mispronounced "continental
  drift," and it came out sounding like "cunnilingual drift." We
  brainstormed a few meanings for cunnilingual drift before
  settling on this one: When a person's tongue drifts down to a
  woman's anus, on purpose or by accident, during an intense
  session of cunnilingus.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911157
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.385084
text:
  <teste_fly> i talk shit, and none of it's true and i'm a
  skinny pussy who wouldn't harm a turd
  <teste_fly> but i will give it a stern talking to


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911158
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.385128
text:
  <lurtz_the_orc> i did not know how stupid someone can be that
  actullay read LOTR so right know i do not know


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911158
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.385176
text:
  <@CCFreak2K> Go down to your local Home Depot and ask for one.
  <%Zeraliten> No such thing as Home Depot in eurofag-land :(
  <@CCFreak2K> Then go to a Home...Gulag.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911158
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.385225
text:
  <[ric]> as the old joke goes, commodore is so bad a marketing,
  if they bought KFC they would rename it "warm dead bird"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911159
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.385284
text:
  <k0reany0> hey it's been long time since I've talked to you.
  <Xilokumsh0t> let's meet up and have a beer sometime
  <k0reany0> sure.  btw how is your wife nancy doing?
  <Xilokumsh0t> her name is suzy
  <k0reany0> who cares!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911159
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.385458
text:
  <+Skerper> I remember once in first year CS
  <+Skerper> this guy asked me to tutor him
  <+Skerper> was absolutely devastated that he'd gotten a 0 for
  his programming assignment
  <+Skerper> so he shows it to me
  <+Skerper> and he's literally written an essay on how to make
  the program
  <nugyflex> what the fuck
  <+Skerper> complete with stock images and references
  <BlackMoon> hahah
  <+Jattenalle> haha, aaw
  <+Skerper> but no actual program
  <nugyflex> ahahha
  <+Jattenalle> poor innocent little child
  <+Skerper> Never had such an "oh sweety" moment in my life
  <nugyflex> how does that happen
  <+Skerper> I have no fucking idea, it was the most awkward
  thing
  <nugyflex> how can that possibly happen...
  <+Skerper> I don't know how he got it into his head that that
  was the assignment
  <+Skerper> considering it had to be handed up to an automarker
  <+Skerper> that compiles it and tests output
  <nugyflex> Oooo nooo
  <nugyflex> tries to compile essay
  <nugyflex> rip


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911160
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.385536
text:
  <Zach> Is your Dad home?
  <videogameaholic> yep
  <Zach> You get any hot chicks on the internet yet?
  <videogameaholic> wtf?  There aren't any chicks on the
  internet.
  <Zach> You gotta do what I do.  I get onto one of them lesbian
  chatrooms and pretend to be a 19 year old girl.
  <videogameaholic> I bet the other 60 "horny lesbians" in that
  room think they are just as clever as you.
  <Zach> no no no, they're really women, they send me naked
  pictures
  <videogameaholic> What do you do when they ask for yours?
  <Zach> I send them a pic of a 19 year old girl.
  <videogameaholic> ...
  <Zach> No seriously, they're all lesbians.
  <videogameaholic> If you say so...
  <Zach> damn straight.
  <videogameaholic> I'm sure you are.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911160
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.385585
text:
  <Carisear> Ever since i put the "Tires by Firestone" bumper
  sticker on my car, no one seems to tailgate me anymore.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911160
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.385643
text:
  <c-unut> pfft slipknot
  <Finch > slipknot go good
  <c-unut> I've always seen them sorta like anal sex
  <Finch> if u want to look at it that way...
  <c-unut> You know, I appreciate that some may enjoy it, and it
  has its moments, but at the end of the day, its still fucking
  shit.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911161
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.385692
text:
  <HailBrak> "Oh shit! I got the shoe! I'm so invincible! Oh!
  Eat it, you bitch! You don't understand! I got the damn SHOE!
  It's the shoe! And look at how cute I am with my stupid
  plumber head poking out of the wind up sock! I am the cutest
  invincible shoe rider ever! Mario! Mario! He's in the ULTRA
  green SHOOEEE!"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911161
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.385819
text:
  ChronikG: Dude, I'm going to hell. I was typing in a porn site
  and was about to hit enter when all of a sudden "Jesus Walks"
  comes on the radio.
  TragicEnd: did you still go to the site?
  ChronikG: Yea, I figured Jesus just wanted to chill and watch
  porn with me.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911162
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.385870
text:
  <ivan356> Pacemakers already have radioactive batteries.
  <Kintanon> And they are a hell of a lot more convenient than
  those old Wind Up pacemakers! I tell you man, having to reach
  into grandpa's chest every 6 hours and wind him back up was a
  pain in the ass!
  <jonnythan> "Was" a pain in the ass?  Did you forget once?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911162
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.385919
text:
  <tweet> does n e one else's gf ever told them they wanna fuck
  you with a strapon?
  <Nekorin> Good news, Tweet, you have a girlfriend.
  <Nekorin> Bad news, she's thinks you're gay.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911162
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.385957
text:
  <mig|sluice> trillian, like a capitalist social-democracy,
  will suit me until I see something better to take its place.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911163
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.386011
text:
  (Bucks) do you hate midgets?
  (@Fantasy) yep, I blame that evil midget in rehab
  (refused) no rehab is complete without an evil midget
  (@Fantasy) headbutted me in the balls
  (refused) LOL
  (@Fantasy) and he was the perfect height
  (refused) rofl
  (Bucks) rofl
  (@Fantasy) his head was literally crotch height
  (refused) who the fuck even does that
  (@Fantasy) that midget
  (refused) ... yeah obviously... but come on.
  (@Fantasy) after you spend a month making midget jokes
  (refused) lol
  (@Fantasy) to a cocaine addict in rehab
  (@Fantasy) then on family/friends day having all your friends
  make fun of his midget kind
  (@Fantasy) he came up and said something like "stop shitting,
  dog"
  (refused) you kinda deserved it then
  (@Fantasy) I laughed
  (@Fantasy) he said you want to start something
  (@Fantasy) I said say it to my face
  (@Fantasy) and LAUGHED
  (@Fantasy) he headbutted me in the balls
  (@Fantasy) I was on the ground
  (refused) yeah of course
  (@Fantasy) crying
  (refused) I'd give that fucking midget a medal
  (@Fantasy) so he squatted down and said "stop messing with me"
  (@Fantasy) right in my face
  (Bucks) what an wesome midget
  (@Fantasy) had to get a new roomate after that
  (@Fantasy) since the midget was my roomate
  (@Fantasy) and since then I've been afraid of midgets


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911163
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.386067
text:
  <kisama_> i've been quaking so much lately
  <kisama_> that when i close my eyes
  <kisama_> i see quad damage
  <D1> I see naked men.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911163
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.386187
text:
  <PovRayMan> that was a weird dream I had last night
  <PovRayMan> I was about to have sex with this hot chick
  <PovRayMan> and I started peeing all over her
  <PovRayMan> and she started gargling it too... damn weird
  <PovRayMan> I think I know what caused it too
  <PovRayMan> I went to the bathroom about 5 times last night ot
  pee
  <PovRayMan> and a friend of mine was showing me pics he took
  of this girl on his campus he wants to be with
  <Floach> and 3), you have a pee fetish
  <gridbug> Yep.
  <PovRayMan> I don't have a pee fetish.
  <PovRayMan> I was trying to fuck her damnit
  <PovRayMan> but I couldn't stop peeing on her


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911164
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.386251
text:
  <Ariakas> What's white, black, and red all over and has
  difficulty passing through a revolving door?
  <Dolands> A nun with a spear through her head!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911164
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.386328
text:
  <+zubby> strawberry barium shake anyone?
  * Heartsbane passes.
  * zubby just did, too...
  <+zubby> had me drink 2 24oz cups of it. fell in love with the
  nurse.
  <+zubby> she kept pulling her phone out... i couldn't mimic...
  <+zubby> she asked if i knew how to hack facebook cuz she
  'likes to snoop'
  * Heartsbane nods.
  <+zubby> as we said our goodbyes she let her hair down and i
  swear it was in slow motion
  <+zubby> should i have added the part that i'm shitting what
  appears to be milk and clay?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911164
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.386399
text:
  <gpi> -:- BitchX: Join to #brocku was synched in 0.153 secs!!
  <gpi> i love the double exclamation mark
  <gpi> as if that's shattering some world record
  <trigga> lol
  <gpi> HOLY SHIT YOU SYNCED FAST!!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911165
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.386478
text:
  <Mr_E> kazaa lite's a little better... I get a good 30 seconds
  of downloading before it crashes
  <Mr_E> regular kazaa crashes on start up
  <Mr_E> I need like, kazaa-uber-lite
  <Mr_E> if there was such thing
  <Mr_E> maybe I'd get a whole file done then
  <w|zzy> it is your celery
  <Mr_E> excuse me?
  <logicalentity> hehe
  <logicalentity> NOW THATS TECH SUPPORT


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911165
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.386532
text:
  <Ned> I should open up a resturant with the claim that it's
  jewish and kosher and all that
  <Ned> and put ham in everything
  <Ned> that'd be awesome
  <Ned> kind of like rape, but not really


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911165
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.386591
text:
  <Method> good evening gentlemen.
  <Method> would you like to play a game?
  <Method> It's called "guess what intoxicated state I'm in".
  <Method> It's really fun.
  <Method> on a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being the least, 2
  being the most, and 10 being somewhere around the middle...


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911166
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.386737
text:
  <+WAREZmunkey> owwww shit
  <+WAREZmunkey> i just managed to put a staple into my tongue
  <+WAREZmunkey> teach me to chew on it i suppose
  <graeme> I cannot even begin to imagine the sequence of steps
  that caused to to accidentally staple your tongue.
  <+WAREZmunkey> ok i will rephrase it
  <+WAREZmunkey> i just stupidly put a staple into my tongue
  <Lithium> LOL


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911166
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.386786
text:
  (Freddo) wasnt tetris supposed to be a statement about the
  futility of a capitalist government
  (Freddo) ?
  (jayseven) O_o
  (jayseven) dude
  (jayseven) it was just a game
  (jayseven) :P
  (Freddo) yeah but it was coded by a red :P
  (jayseven) you mean.. the blocks symbolise the commies?
  (Freddo) i think the blocks symbolise money
  (Dom^TopSpin) O_O
  (Freddo) or maybe debts
  (Dom^TopSpin) lol
  (pdhq64) make a row of money, and it disappears?
  (Freddo) something like that
  (Freddo) its an important message to the children of today :P
  (jayseven) maybe it's the publics efforts to banish their
  tyrant
  (jayseven) the more of them that attempt to reach the top, the
  more likely they'll make a line and.. er.. dissapear


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911166
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.386844
text:
  <The_Roach> Well, the boss' wife needs me to fix her computer.
  <The_Roach> You know what that means.
  <Anton> you're gonna be fixing a computer for a bit?
  <Waldo> pr0n music stuck in your head?
  <The_Roach> Yes and yes.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911167
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.386890
text:
  <D3v1in^jr> i learned just how hardcore goth girls can be last
  night
  <D3v1in^jr> got with this girl sarah...her clit was painted
  dark purple


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911167
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.387003
text:
  [09:56] <Thom> I wonder how many words they have for
  'pervert'.
  [09:56] <Squizzle> None.
  [09:56] <Squizzle> The closest is their word for "native", I
  bet.
  [09:57] <Thom> 'hentai'. 'ecchi'.
  [09:57] <Squizzle> Those both mean "Japanese man".


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911167
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.387059
text:
  <RedXIII> I'm thinking of becoming a health inspector :o
  <RedXIII> "there's a 20 in this for you if you let that whole
  cockroach thing slide"
  <RedXIII> "vishbar, you drive a hard bargain"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911168
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.387112
text:
  <Misty> ...but it's sold out. ;.;
  <Sue>  ;_;
  <Alex> Her eyes are producing commas...
  <Alex> Maybe you should get that checked


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911168
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.387160
text:
  <Ash> Anybody can get a girlfriend, just like anybody can get
  a job. Most likely he has a "minimum wage" girlfriend.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911170
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.387207
text:
  <WhiteHowler> When did the Swedes get so good at Track and
  Field?
  <Cubby[history]> When someone put a keg at the end of their
  lane.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911170
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.387255
text:
  <HeatDeath> You should take care of your nipples. They may not
  seem important
  now, but when you die, that's where the angels grab you.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911170
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.387320
text:
  <q8D> jesus christ I have the runs this morning
  <q8D> woo
  <q8D> it's like my ass is yelling at the toilet


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911170
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.387413
text:
  <Afxtwin> I am looking for some really good ascii art
  <ecto> I got it
  <ecto> but you got to suck my dick first.
  <sXr> show him your cok pls
  <ecto>            _
  <ecto>           /\) _
  <ecto>      _   / / (/\
  <ecto>     /\) ( Y)  \ \
  <ecto>    / /   ""   (Y )
  <ecto>   ( Y)  _      ""
  <ecto>    ""  (/\       _
  <ecto>         \ \     /\)
  <ecto>         (Y )   / /
  <ecto>          ""   ( Y)
  <ecto>                ""


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911171
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.387462
text:
  <zacwhite> they should do rock paper scissors over mail
  <schwatoo> they do
  <zacwhite> really? sweet.
  <schwatoo> it is called paper, paper, paper though


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911171
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.387513
text:
  <Morelos> i think i want the rtfm shirt
  <maxracer> whats rtfm
  <Morelos> maxracer - i suggest you rtfm to find out
  <maxracer> man rftm?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911171
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.387561
text:
  dragon9995: oh man
  dragon9995: you know last night when I told you that I was
  going to rape your mom or something like that?  apparently I
  left it on the screen and my mom saw it and didn't think it
  was a joke
  dragon9995: she just came in here and freaked out out at me
  dragon9995: holy shit
  dragon9995: she like started crying and she thinks I'm a
  rapist


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911172
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.387613
text:
  <+dogcow> Did you hear about the MPAA being caught using
  pirated software?
  <+dogcow> http://yro.slashdot.org/article.pl?sid=07/02/18/
  0458213
  <+TheHURD> *loooooooooooooooooooool*
  <+dogcow> Can anyone recommend any good movies? I'm going to
  celebrate!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911172
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.387674
text:
  * Topic is 'Download help NOT available here.'
  * eats (Skuller@h24-69-27-242.gv.shawcable.net) has joined #
  new2mIRC
  <eats> i need to get a trial version of maya 3d software. were
  in this program can i go to look this up?
  <@corm> www.download.com
  <eats> not that comon
  <@corm> oh
  <@corm> you mean on mirc
  <eats> yes sir/mame
  <@corm> push Ctrl and F4 at the same time, it opens the file
  search dialog
  * eats (Skuller@h24-69-27-242.gv.shawcable.net) has left #
  New2mIRC
  <@corm> snicker


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911173
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.387849
text:
  <BrettBits> My website's stat counter uses Javascript to
  detect whether or not my viewers have Javascript enabled.
  <BrettBits> Naturally, it appears that 100% of the people
  visiting my website have Javascript enabled.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911173
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.387895
text:
  (seiki) &google inflatable+goat
  (fnet) Google (inflatable+goat): http://
  www.vacationbibleschool.com/v_newfeatures.html


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911173
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.387952
text:
  <DrSeuss> I am thinking about the sequel to the vat in the hat
  <DrSeuss> It will have theoretical chemistry
  <fourbitfox> Oh the Crystals You'll Grow?
  <DrSeuss> YES
  <fourbitfox> Sounds more like the G rated version of Breaking
  Bad.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911173
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.388000
text:
  <lamont-> spanish kids can speak better english than most kids
  on aol
  <lamont-> when they're fucking three years old!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911174
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.388101
text:
  <Tengu> I can has kitty?
  <kjbrasda> i'll mail you one
  <kjbrasda> first class
  <HyperSquirrel> poke in air holes
  <Gibbie> I don't think you should put holes in the kitty


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911174
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.388142
text:
  Mazgurth: what does slashdotting mean?
  antizeph: youve never heard of slashdot?
  Mazgurth: I know it makes websites not work


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911175
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.388196
text:
  <Moogs> Matrix Reloaded is a very different kind of film from
  the original, both in style and theme. The first movie posed
  the question, "What is the nature of reality?" The question
  for this movie is, "Do French people ever stop talking?" -
  MacHall
  <WrexSoul> Or perhaps, "Why is Colonel Sanders sitting in a
  room full of TVs?"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911175
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.388242
text:
  <CL_FlushEntity> i know im back and forth from my pc to my
  living room
  <IcX|-hoS> if I get up I get lost


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911175
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.388288
text:
  <jagyd> I think you finally found a character not limited by
  your intellectual capabilities.
  <Dwopple the Orc> huh?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911175
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.388336
text:
  <Bloodnose> THESE ANIMAL DILDOS ARE RIDICULOUS.  MY CAT NEVER
  PLAYS WITH THE TOYS I BOUGHT FOR HIM ALREADY, LIKE HE'D USE
  THESE.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911176
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.388391
text:
  <surfer> anyone here
  <surfer> how do i set up an irc script : S
  <surfer> whats the command
  <seven> surfer : there's a limit of 3 stupid questions within
  the first hour of joining, you've only got 1 left.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911176
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.388496
text:
  <greggk> will somebody please tell me why, in our
  self-proclaimed conservative society, do homophobic parents
  teach their children "rub a dub dub, three /men/ in a tub"?
  <greggk> not only does it endorse homosexuality and
  promiscuity, but it also implants children with the false
  stereotype that all butchers and bakers are sodomites.
  <joshmunki> what about the candlestick makers?
  <greggk> actually, the rhyme is right about them. they're all
  assdildo fags.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911177
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.388547
text:
  <AndrewOregon> People debate to win, and they usually resort
  to dishonesty in doing so. It's not a conversation.
  <AndrewOregon> IRC is so cozy because it still hosts
  conversation, that rare gem online.
  <lakembra> get raped fgt


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911177
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.388599
text:
  <ShadowMouse> bye
  <Coan_Arcanius> bye
  <[Bryan]> bye
  <cams> bye
  <[Bryan]> (damn we sound like a boy band)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911177
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.388658
text:
  <Perrin> FUCKING CANDY BAG
  <Perrin> OPEN
  <Perrin> OPEN]
  <Perrin> OPEN
  <Perrin> ARHAGHAHGS
  <Perrin> NO
  <Perrin> NOT DOWN THE SIDE
  <Perrin> FARHAHFANSKDFASD


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911177
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.388716
text:
  <Lich> I don't have a superiority complex. I'm jsut better
  than all of you.
  <Lich> *just
  <Lich> Shut up.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911178
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.388790
text:
  isajeep: I think you ride the man train sir.
  rzrshrp: then i'll get off the next stop.
  isajeep: uhhh...


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911178
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.388835
text:
  <JohnerSuKt> ok but it wont put people in control of my
  computer or deleting/altering stuff, just a good ole virus
  right?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911179
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.388931
text:
  <RoboHak> I need a bigger lap, two laptops don't fit very well
  <mynuts> "... and thats where human evolution turned south"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911179
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.388983
text:
  <Oni> It seems when SE goes down, we get a lot of new users.
  * Chop-Logik has joined #sensibleerection
  <Malshai> And some tards.
  <Chop-Logik> MY GURLFRIEND IS SO HOT!
  <Oni> Yeah, gotta love those tards.
  <Malshai> WITH A BIG BUSH


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911179
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.389027
text:
  <CrashCat> downloading lineage: 10 hours. patching lineage: 3
  hours. uninstalling lineage: priceless.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911180
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.389121
text:
  <angryskul> So I think we should allocate a new struct and...
  <angryskul> Did someone just jump off the roof?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911180
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.389261
text:
  <SCarfAcE> Russia has sent in the army to bolster a week-long
  struggle to rescue 10 tons of beer trapped under Siberian ice,
  Itar-Tass news agency said Tuesday. A lorry carrying the beer
  sank when trying to cross the frozen Irtysh river, and a
  rescue team of six divers, 10 workers and a modified T-72 tank
  from the emergencies ministry have so far failed to save the
  load.
  <SCarfAcE> now that's a great allocation of resources!
  <Abstruse> scar: And all we had to get that baby out of the
  well were firefighters with Vasoline.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911181
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.389305
text:
  <CharoNoMe> Obviously gay parents will raise gay children,
  since straight parents only raise straight children.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911181
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.389401
text:
  <Leitari> omg
  <Leitari> king kong is long
  <Leitari> ^^
  <Leitari> my ass hurts
  <Leitari> wait
  <Leitari> that didnt sound right


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911182
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.389442
text:
  andyg721: i think it was on CNN
  andyg721: Condoleeza Rice went to Asia
  andyg721: the headline was RICE IN ASIA


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911182
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.389490
text:
  <joey`> clay...doy you know anything about networking
  <clay> yes
  <clay> the rj45 pee pee goes into the nic pee pee, joey


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911182
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.389546
text:
  <Borgis> Sad, but true. The lively, fun loving, highly
  animated and eccentric borgis you know and love is nowhere
  near as exciting in the flesh.
  <Borgis> Except for the eccentric part.
  <Borgis> Andthe fun-loving part.
  <Tedious_Toad> That's okay, if I was half as lively as I am on
  the net in real life I'd be arrested and tried for murder,
  beastiality, sodomy, indecent assault, masturbation in public
  AND indecent exposure


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911182
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.389597
text:
  <Warmaster_Horus> But some of the stuff you can do with mayo
  is good
  <NiTessine> Yes. Like assassinations.
  <Mithran> You assassinate people with mayo?
  <NiTessine> Nobody ever suspects mayo.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911183
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.389649
text:
  <Bmann> its supposed to be 60 tomorrow?
  <brendando> its nice out here
  <brendando> Not that I have been outside in 2 days
  <brendando> But I'm near a window


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911183
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.389693
text:
  < Cronos Gabliani > I personally belive that in any situation
  that you expect a kick in the balls, and you get a slap in the
  face, thats a victory.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911183
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.389743
text:
  <tipz> just remember kids
  <tipz> hippos eat strawberry ice cream
  <thadood> I'll keep that in mind next time I visit your mom.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911184
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.389846
text:
  <ParadoX> lol my friend just said he stole a bong from this
  guys house, but from how he described it, it's a penis pump
  <ParadoX> he said he put his mouth to it, and it smelled funny
  <ParadoX> HAHAHA
  <Phucker> Owned.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911184
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.389892
text:
  cyberstick: I hate computers
  abszero: Haha, you're in the wrong business bro.
  cyberstick: Windows?  No problem.  Windows is fine.  The PC is
  at fault.
  cyberstick: Mark my words
  abszero: Not blaming Microsoft? You've changed man.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911185
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.389998
text:
  <@PookaIN> dich un kunt!
  <+Thorsen> ok i dont can germaish
  <ev-> i don't can norwegian neither you get?
  <Thorsen> CAN SOMEBODY EACH ME SOME GERMANY???????
  <Thorsen> WHAT MEANS I WONNA FUCK IN GERMANISH


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911185
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.390045
text:
  <fuckin`eh> If you think your cool CLICK HERE!
  <JtHM> fuckin`eh: nothing happened when I clicked :(


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911186
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.390197
text:
  <ame> get on it
  <ame> jungle bugie
  <ame> dielsuo dielsuo
  <ame> jungle boogie huhuhah wha hwo
  <ame> (i used to be the lead singer for the local super market
  PA system)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911186
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.390243
text:
  <UberCore> who here wants to participate in a stastical
  analysis
  <UberCore> involving sex, and star wars/star trek


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911186
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.390295
text:
  [_Fidel_] your husband is that nigger that hugs u in
  "bigt.jpg"?
  [rinat2137] dont use that word please.
  [rinat2137] but yeah..thats him
  [_Fidel_] how does a nice white jewish girl like yourself fell
  inlove with a niggro ?
  [rinat2137] i said dont use that word..please
  [_Fidel_] i'm sorry, "colored" dude
  [rinat2137] and an answer for your question, love is BLIND
  [a_duck] "love is BLIND"... i think you are the blind if you
  got married with a nigger


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911187
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.390392
text:
  <Ryutaro> hard minty eyedrops?
  <Ryutaro> WTFD
  <miharu> oO
  <miharu> WTF... D?
  <miharu> What The Fuckwouldjesus Do?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911188
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.390579
text:
  <Spydie> ive been playing games too much, when i close my eyes
  i see gun fights
  <NuGgEt|mIRC> i see naked men


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911188
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.390625
text:
  <Joe_> gheybot, life?
  <gheyBot> life is all about lounging in front of the fireplace
  w/ a wyse terminal


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911189
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.390673
text:
  <Pr|muS> (H|J|nX)  BBS Warez?
  <Pr|muS> (H|J|nX)  What do you have BBS related?
  <hydro> wtf is be back soon warez


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911189
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.390722
text:
  <Dayv> Eric, you wouldn't know bad taste if it came up behind
  you and licked your asshole with your mother's severed tongue.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911189
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.390815
text:
  <Doh_> programming is the act of creating a computer program
  <Doh_> not of copying and pasting other peoples code
  <Doh_> not to mention on the grand scheme of things, youre
  program is about as complex as the little clicky thing on the
  end of some pens


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911190
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.390908
text:
  <Deconstructor> in school, i usually go to the bathroom the
  same time everyday, and noone else is there then, so i decided
  to be cool one day so i sidestepped in like the doomguy with
  my fakegun pointed outward, and i circle strafed right into
  this other guy


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911191
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.391059
text:
  <Nev> I heard a shit is like 1/10 an orgasm
  <Valvados> So theoretically
  <Valvados> If I wank
  <Valvados> I won't have to shit for two weeks


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911191
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.391108
text:
  <|Asriel> How many Freudians does it take to change a light
  bulb?
  <|Asriel> Two, one to change the bulb and the other to hold
  the penis
  <|Asriel> I mean ladder!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911191
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.391749
text:
  <Pookablu> Ron Dwight, the author of the RAR compression
  format, passed away a few days ago.
  <ev> he was found in several same-size pieces and had to be
  combined to put him in the coffin


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911192
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.391798
text:
  <HomerJ> I had this computer built for this guy, all ready to
  go...so I walk to where my mom took my car, and when I get
  back, out cat sneezed on the board and fried it


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911192
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.391843
text:
  <DoctorRiff> i hear that every year the piro comes out of his
  hole in the ground and if he sees his shadow we will have 6
  more weeks of delayed comics


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911192
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.391903
text:
  <chisoxiest> is it just me... or does eveyone think that
  quadrapelegics are greedy?
  <chisoxiest> "i can't reach that"
  <chisoxiest> "i'm not tall enough"
  <chisoxiest> i mean c'mon now


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911194
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.392047
text:
  <FrozenBeefLog> hey lets all make sexual symbols
  <Slicey> 8==e
  <FrozenBeefLog> 8======*
  <FrozenBeefLog> hah mines bigger
  <Slicey> yours has an exploded end


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911194
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.392110
text:
  <yuu_> Am I lagged?
  <el_wado> hard to tell, maybe you're just slow
  <yuu_> feh
  <el_wado> try responding to this: are you gay?
  <yuu_> are you not funny?
  <yuu_> how about just pinging me.. that would be simple
  <el_wado> hmmm your delay could be interpreted as lag or
  underlying homosexual tendencies
  -> [yuu_] PING
  [yuu_ PING reply]: 1sec
  <el_wado> 1 second - I suggest blatent homosexual


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911195
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.392159
text:
  <hallam> Buy a planeticket...when you are in the air - go to
  the toilet.. cut off your pubichairs and glue em to your
  chin.. wrap toiletpaper around the top of your head.. KICK THE
  DOOR out to the toilet .. jump out and screaam 'Allah akbar'..


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911195
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.392210
text:
  <beretta> lets say you clone yourself
  <beretta> and then you become attracted to yourself..and wind
  up having sex with your clone
  <beretta> does that make you gay, or are you just on the
  forefront of masturbation technology?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911195
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.392271
text:
  badboy> hi any chicks from berwick
  SaintBloodyMary> I'm from berwick. Let's meet up at your place
  and have wild kinky
  SaintBloodyMary> Should I bring my own handcuffs and lube or
  are you all set?
  badboy> awesome u wanna come over now
  SaintBloodyMary> Sure... because I often fuck strangers from
  online, it's my hobby.
  badboy> bring it u want
  badboy> awesome u sound real kewl :()
  Supreme_101> SaintBloodyMary willing to travel ?
  SaintBloodyMary> Supreme_101: It depends, I'm willing to
  travel 100km's per inch that your penis is over the average
  length.
  Supreme_101> hmmm... looks like im coming to you then :P


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911196
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.392325
text:
  [Buddha] wasn't Microsoft giving a bounty for hackers?
  [Buddha] *catching hackers
  <@AkamuTheInept> Ya, a free copy of '98
  [Buddha] ...
  [Buddha] >_<
  <@Hallucination> lol
  [Buddha] That's like giving out land mines for helping the
  poor


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911196
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.392371
text:
  <clairey> a blowjob is fobbing someone off half the time
  because you couldnt be fucked.  pardon the pun.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911196
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.392423
text:
  <@Dock> Water freezes faster the higher you are, I believe.
  <@phrozen> nice
  <@phrozen> next time i'll use the fridge upstairs


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911196
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.392518
text:
  <Boogieman> possibly the wierdest thing ever just happend.
  <Boogieman> I really had to take a piss so I ran to the
  bathroom.
  <Boogieman> and I ran into the room, but I didn't know that my
  dad put a new mat in there.
  <Boogieman> Ususally bathroom mats have those anti slip things
  on the bottom, but this one didn't
  <Boogieman> and I sliped, smashed my shoulder on the toiled,
  pissed myself, and cried out in pain
  <Boogieman> my dad comes down and is like "what happened!?...
  wait, you know what, I don't want to know" and then goes
  upstairs


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911197
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.392566
text:
  <JonTG> What's more fun than swinging a dead baby around on a
  rope?
  <JonTG> Stopping it with a shovel.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911197
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.392661
text:
  <@bhaak> commit early, commit often
  <@bhaak> kids, that is only sound advice for programming, not
  for marriage!
  < kerio> there's no rollback in marriage, only blame


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911198
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.392713
text:
  <RatingsQ> WHOA I JUST HAD AN IDEA FOR A MOVIE
  <RatingsQ> d00d what if you had this dude, typing on IRC...
  <RatingsQ> but if he falls below 55 words per minute, dalnet
  explodes?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911198
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.392795
text:
  <shigelojoe>Y'know, the NAACP is always complaining about how
  black unemployment is up half the time
  <shigelojoe>but if you think about it, the last time there
  were no unemployed black people in America, they didn't have
  benefits to go with it
  <shigelojoe>like freedom, for instance


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911198
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.392851
text:
  <roric23> i just pulled an elastic thread out of my sock and
  now I'm flossing with it :)
  <Pace|Around> yay for Sock Floss
  <rigelIsGood> Dude, that is kinda gross.
  <roric23> well, yeah. it does sort of have that sock-like
  flavor to it
  <roric23> not that I taste socks for a living or anything
  <Pace|Around> Well, if you ever want to, you now have
  something to put on your resume


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911199
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.392994
text:
  [09:50] <Xerox> Hey, anyone who knows Japanese, what does
  "kikurimu" mean?
  [09:52] <Squizzle> "I am a preteen with bouncing breasts."
  [09:53] <Zonkto> There are probably three or four words for
  that.
  [09:53] <Zonkto> Sort of like the Eskimos having so many words
  for snow.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911199
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.393060
text:
  <filefly> and she asked me "should i be worried?" i said "no,
  you wanna know what i think?"
  <filefly> so i told her
  <filefly> "...and the prospect of finding her perfect
  educational institution threatens to overwhelm her tiny brain"
  <filefly> which normally would've made her laugh
  <filefly> had i not left the letters "i" and "n" off of
  "brain"
  * filefly bashes head on desk repeatedly


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911200
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.393111
text:
  <Alwyn Aldarion> X are you deaf or what ?
  <MegamanX2K> Yes. Yes, I am deaf. This makes it IMPOSSIBLE for
  me to read anything written on screen, because I have trained
  a parrot to read whatever is on my screen so I can browse the
  web while at the same time spying on the cute girl next door
  while she's changing AND her equally cute sister who is also
  changing AT THE SAME TIME. So, yes, I was unable to hear your
  enlightening post. I apologize.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911200
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.393164
text:
  <lewney> I remember being wasted last night; I went to the
  bathroom and shared an asla with some other guy
  <lewney> cause there was a long queue
  <lewney> to the bathrooms...
  <lewney> yes, I'll shut up now.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911201
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.393307
text:
  <Kerpal>the Cd-key is 56dsr67x
  <vR|Sn00kie>Wont work....hmm
  <kerpal>Hmm....it is x as in zebra
  <vR|Sn00kie> you are stupid


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911201
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.393396
text:
  <sponge> windows needs a big red button that deletes windows
  when you click it.. itll be temping to the morons
  <sponge> and thus the internet will be left with all the smart
  people
  <sponge> and the newbie mac users


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911201
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.393438
text:
  mouAng: cuz im not perverted
  mouAng: hahas
  IllIllziroIllIll: say something perverted
  IllIllziroIllIll: at least once
  IllIllziroIllIll: like
  IllIllziroIllIll: boobies
  mouAng: ums okays
  mouAng: toe


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911202
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.393498
text:
  <+maaneeack> and I can't get off 56k if there is nothing else
  <+maaneeack> 56k, or yelling, and there is waaaay too much
  packet loss and downtime on yelling
  <acquacow> that's what I tried to tell my mom
  <acquacow> so I moved out
  <acquacow> we now communicate digitally
  <acquacow> and with the right spam filter
  <acquacow> I hear nothing at all.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911203
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.393599
text:
  <Sarkazein> i was STONE COLD STEVE AUSTIN drunk
  <Sarkazein> and she wanted me to rub her clit
  <Sarkazein> talk about fucking effort
  <Sarkazein> i was ready to pass out
  <Stu_pid> from rubbing her clit?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911203
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.393653
text:
  <ASk> ads make the baby jesus cry
  <CitizenErased> PLAGIARISM
  <ASk> You can't own baby jesus, he's under GPL


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911203
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.393721
text:
  <Affe> i got a dual head card today
  <Arcane> what kind of dualhead card?
  <Affe> radeon
  <cardian> they make a radeon dual head?
  <cardian> which one
  <Affe> i dunno
  <cardian> you dont know which card you bought?
  <cardian> were you high?
  <Affe> no
  <Affe> it was a trade for services
  <cardian> ahh
  <Arcane> blowjob?
  <Arcane> it musta been shitty head if they gave you a radeon
  <cardian> hhaaahha


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911204
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.393816
text:
  <mitkok> Hey, guys. Is there an easy way to split an array of
  100 integers for example and write 3 numbers per line
  separated by whitespace into a file ?
  <Izhido> #include "realeasyfunctions.h"  /
  Split100intArrayWrite3xLineWithWhitespaceInto(FILE* f);


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911204
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.393864
text:
  <lief> My brother just got suspended from school for sticking
  a bible down his pants while walking around in the halls
  singing Mansons "Personal Jesus" and asking random girls to
  "Reach down and touch faith".


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911204
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.393914
text:
  <RobbiePaul> i really wish the redneck neighbors that moved in
  next door would feed their children anti-freeze
  <Nichole> slip it into some popcicles and serve
  <RobbiePaul> "anti" freeze...


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911205
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.393981
text:
  <SenorWeird> ugh. I need help
  <Duckie5147> with what?
  <SenorWeird> I got to the end of a page in this novel i'm
  reading and I hit the "page down" button on my keyboard.
  <Duckie5147> hahaha
  <Duckie5147> you need to read things not one the screen
  <SenorWeird>  and when the page didn't turn, I got pissed and
  grabbed the mouse and was like where's the damn scroll bar"
  <SenorWeird>  and then I realized...."you're reading a book.
  let the mouse go."


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911205
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.394045
text:
  <deepspring> well.. my car just passed it's blueslip
  inspection and I mean just...
  <deepspring> the mechanic said that he found plenty of "minor"
  issues that I would have to fix... luckily he let them slide
  <deepspring> minor oil leak from the automatic transmission
  <deepspring> bad hatch alignment
  <deepspring> one of my driving lights (little halogen addon
  ones) was buggered
  <LrdShaper> bad driver behind wheel
  <deepspring> my ignition key can drop out of the ignition
  while the engine is running
  <LrdShaper> right front wheel held on by masking tape
  <LrdShaper> but the cathodes and led fans are what made
  himover look the problems


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911205
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.394112
text:
  <@vorien> Finally fixed the bot to do real-time language
  translation, check it out.
  <@vorien> lum, translate to spanish I am unable to accept a
  position at this time with your company. Thank you for your
  interest but I am an english speaking individual.
  <@lum> vorien: :(
  <@vorien> damn
  <@vorien> lum, translate to spanish I am unable to accept a
  position at this time with your company.
  <@lum> vorien: :(
  <@vorien> wtf
  <@vorien> lum, translate to spanish I like donkeys for sexual
  purposes.
  <@lum> vorien: Tengo gusto de los burros para los propósitos
  sexuales.
  <@vorien> Naturally.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911205
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.394166
text:
  <EvilKosh> holy shit. he's blending the iphone while it's
  playing will it blend. that's so meta.
  <jdk> does anything not blend?
  <EvilKosh> Jews and Palestinians


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911206
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.394213
text:
  «+ aisu_kurimu » damn right
  «+ aisu_kurimu » wait i think i messed up my ghetto lang
  «+ aisu_kurimu » damn straight*
  «+ aisu_kurimu » ughhhh 17 years in the ghetto, you'd think
  i'd pick up something
  «@Xellos-san» yeah, herpes


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911206
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.394307
text:
  Dough Girl7777:  my grandma is funny
  CherryOnion1979:  okay
  Dough Girl7777:  she tries to spoil me, but she has like no
  money, so she gives me plants
  Dough Girl7777:  and she gets all excited when she gives em to
  me


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911206
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.394366
text:
  <Eldron> ruba, btw,.  IM THAT BIG GUY WHO IS SCREWING YOUR
  SISTER! HAH!
  <StalkerofurSoul> shes 8!
  <Eldron> the younger the better?
  <Atreides^away> just the way eldron likes them
  <Atreides^away> hairless ;)
  <Rubastic> ... umm, most people like them ... smooth.
  <Eldron> I like them moistorized
  <Yemen> I like em hairless, smooth and moist
  <StalkerofurSoul> does blood count?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911207
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.394421
text:
  <Thumb> do you know of any major organizations that are
  similar the CDC?
  <Lucent> who?
  <Thumb> center for disease control
  <Lucent> i said WHO
  <Thumb> what? i'm asking you
  <Lucent> World Health Organization


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911207
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.394510
text:
  (Thoth) Funniest toilet graffiti this evening: "I fucked your
  mother!" underneith: "Dad, you're drunk! Go home!"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911208
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.394559
text:
  <barkode:#916> i'm a fan of real time irc.
  <barkode:#916> not this
  playing-chess-via-postal-mail-to-uzbekistan irc strategy kubla
  has


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911208
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.394621
text:
  <^NoS^Sikarian> you know
  <^NoS^Sikarian> in working with the tech department the past
  week
  <^NoS^Sikarian> know what ive found out?
  <^NoS^Sikarian> those windows XP taskbar tray popup bubbles
  are like a little kid
  <^NoS^Sikarian> 'HEY! LOoK AT ME!  LOOOK WHAT IM DOING! =D =D
  =D LOoK!! YOUR NOT LOOOOKKINNGG!!!! COME ON LOOK!!"
  <^NoS^Sikarian> Then you click the X and say "Ok I fucking see
  you"
  <^NoS^Sikarian> 5 seconds... "HEY LOOK AT ME AGAIN! =D"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911208
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.394663
text:
  Silent Scream098: its cold in my house
  Silent Scream098: burrrr
  Silent Scream098: maybe i shoud close the window and turn the
  ac off
  Silent Scream098: and not walk around naked while holding ice
  cubes between my buttcheeks


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911209
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.394858
text:
  <Syl_Aran> my computer randomly got a bios again
  <Syl_Aran> i strangely think it happened when the power went
  out.
  <Syl_Aran> i don't fucking understand this thing >_<
  <TheHumanCow> yeah, i don't think you do


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911210
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.394904
text:
  -!- lightman [~light@83.225.150.69] has joined #japan
  <lightman> i must find a japanese wife
  <lucke> google-san.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911210
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.395001
text:
  <My3blKa> bizee go get your vacum and imagination.
  <andro> I've heards its bad to do that w/ a vacuum
  <supreemball> it hurts


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911210
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.395105
text:
  <`KArmA> and now, an Ode to Redhat 8, in free verse
  <`KArmA> I heard that you were cool
  <`KArmA> I read the reviews which said you were
  <`KArmA> I downloaded your isos and burned you to CD
  <`KArmA> The install was beautiful
  <`KArmA> You loaded just fine
  <`KArmA> But your network configuration sucked and you lied to
  me about my soundcard
  <`KArmA> Then you wouldn't update your software like you said
  you would
  <`KArmA> you lied repeatedly to me about my kerberos 5
  libraries
  <`KArmA> the sound still won't work despite your assurances
  <`KArmA> and I'm left rage hating you, your company, the
  development community that spawned you and Linus Torvalds
  himself
  <`KArmA> Fuck you Red Hat 8, if you are the example of what
  Linux Desktops are supposed to bbe
  <`KArmA> then I will continue to use OpenBSD
  <`KArmA> . . .
  <`KArmA> thank you
  * JaG cheers
  <phr0work> hehe
  <phr0work> that was pretty nice karma
  <DesScorp> ha ha ha ha
  <`KArmA> see? poetry does not suck r0b
  <`KArmA> it just has to hit you in the right spot
  <phr0work> hehe
  <`KArmA> and if anyone posts that to bash.org I'm going to jam
  my Redhat 8 install CDs up your ass sideways
  <DesScorp> you could've just done a Haiku......"Red Hat sucks
  my cock......OpenBSD rolls over the penguin......As I shave
  Linus Torvald's Mother's back"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911211
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.395207
text:
  <kaleido> how hard is it to plug a fuckin modem into a router
  <kaleido> "well i dont know what to do, man"
  <kaleido> fuckin christ
  <kaleido> where do we find these field engineers
  <PunkScum> compton?
  <kaleido> i was thinkin guinea
  <kaleido> but compton might be right


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911211
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.395267
text:
  <modp> off work now, time to get scotched up
  <jas0n> drunk yet?
  <modp> BUCK'S ABORTION CLINIC SPEAKING. YOU RAPE 'EM, WE
  SCRAPE 'EM. NO FETUS CAN BEAT US.
  <jas0n> is your liver okay?
  <modp> i'd say it's an approximate physical manifestation of a
  metaphor for my life


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911212
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.395309
text:
  (Pikaben) I just thought of something.
  (Pikaben) Do people in Europe measure their wangs with the
  Metric system?
  (SSNWadmanKiddo) Probably? Maybe? Oh my. :O
  (Joe_Fox) what else would we use?
  (Pikaben) Our superior american Measurement system? =/
  (Joe_Fox) superior
  (Joe_Fox) as if
  (Joe_Fox) imperial is crap :|
  (SSNWadmanKiddo) HAR HAR
  (SSNWadmanKiddo) American Measurment is so outdated.
  (Joe_Fox) exactly
  (Joe_Fox) round numbers are alot easier to use and handle
  (Joe_Fox) heh, round
  (SSNWadmanKiddo) Round... firm... fully pac-::shot::
  (Joe_Fox) just what i was waiting for


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911212
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.395355
text:
  <[Knob]> IM NOT COLORBLIND, thanks to this test: http://
  www.liquidgeneration.com/sabotage/vision_sabotage.asp
  <rTenshi> I WISH I WERE BLIND, thanks to this page: http://
  www.goatse.cx


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911212
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.395401
text:
  <ChunLi> my friend works at a hospital and said this guy came
  in with an aspargaus stuck up his ass =)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911213
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.395492
text:
  <[ric]> god, damnit... wished I had never started on that
  gothornot.com  ... I'll never get any work done now.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911213
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.395657
text:
  <PS_Mouse> it would seem IRC doesn't like Azureus
  <coedman> it knows your warezing ways
  <PS_Mouse> I'm not warezing, I'm downloading .isos for obscure
  versions of linux
  <PS_Mouse> very obscure
  <coedman> versions of linux that happen to resemble recently
  released software or movies?
  <coedman> >.>
  <PS_Mouse> not at all
  <PS_Mouse> for what ever reason the guy who's been compiling
  these versions has done away with the standard numerical
  versioning system and resorted to using album names
  <PS_Mouse> for example, the beta versions are named after
  metallica albums


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911214
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.395768
text:
  <Loser> i just got an idea
  <Loser> i bet noone's done this before
  <Loser> get like 100 guys to come into a bottle
  <Loser> and then pay a chick to drink it
  <AlmtyBob> Loser: um, that's what bukkake is all about
  <ryo-ohki> I have videos to prove it.
  <ryo-ohki> We're talking like a fucking clear saucer FULL of
  spooge
  <ryo-ohki> Like, she could pour some cereal on it and still
  not have enough cereal to finish the jizz off.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911214
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.395810
text:
  Keeper36rm: i almost got arrested too last night
  interventi0n: for what?
  Keeper36rm: racing
  interventi0n: get pulled over?
  Keeper36rm: we both did
  interventi0n: who was the other car?
  Keeper36rm: but the girl lied, she told the cop I was
  harassing her, she was just trying to get away from me
  Keeper36rm: so he left her off, and I almost got arrested


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911215
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.395956
text:
  *** deathazre sets mode: +o Dean
  *** ChanServ sets mode: -o Dean
  <deathazre> erm :/
  <deathazre> stupid auto complete
  *** deathazre sets mode: +o deathazre


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911215
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.396008
text:
  <Glasses> Quebec is on fire?
  <Glasses> I'm sure the rest of Cananda won't be too upset...
  <Paul> Upset? THey started it.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911216
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.396057
text:
  <|Yimbo|> i know this is stupidly elitist but i lieked eminem
  before 11 year old girls started hailing him as their idol.
  <WoodenPlank> hes good angry music
  <WoodenPlank> 11 year old girls are fucking sheep more than
  anyone else on the planet
  <WoodenPlank> that sounds so dirty its pathetic


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911216
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.396107
text:
  <Sp3cial> STEP 1: Spout retarded crap about beardy guys and
  overlords.
  <Sp3cial> STEP 2: Live in a time when people are retarded.
  <Sp3cial> STEP 3: ?????
  <Sp3cial> STEP 4: PROPHET!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911216
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.396163
text:
  <Apollyon> I was at a store and some little kid comes in and
  says "Do you buy Pokemon cards?"
  <Apollyon> The owner looks at them, he responds "No, but I'll
  take them as trade. Would you like anything in particular?"
  <Apollyon> And the little kid goes "Money?"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911216
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.396214
text:
  <Picco|0z> {[io_sreep]} Can you explain what RAID is to me?
  <halcy0n> isn't it two harddrives where one holds all the 1's
  and the other holds all the 0's?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911217
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.396264
text:
  <bin_Laden> Some English teacher got beaten to death a couple
  months ago.
  <Morris> hahaha
  <Morris> must've given an AP student a B


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911217
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.396366
text:
  <drlion> squirrels have sexy tails
  <drlion> like foxes
  <[ric]> hmm.... define "sexy"
  <[ric]> in fact, don't... I will leave it to my imagination..
  :)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911217
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.396416
text:
  <Scott> My friend Anne just... gave me some offer
  <Scott> Like... an odd, odd offer
  <Scott> She offered to give me five dollars if I let her blow
  me.
  <Luckett_X> GET YOUR COCK OUT AND THRUST IT AT HER


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911218
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.396528
text:
  <TunkeyMicket> HOLY SHIT MY COMPUTER IS BROADCASTING AN IP
  ADDRESS
  <TunkeyMicket> HOW DO I MAKE IT STOP
  <TunkeyMicket> THIS WINDOW CAME UP
  <TunkeyMicket> TOLD ME THAT IT WAS DANGEROUS


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911219
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.396592
text:
  <[Cable]Tech> has anyone managed to join
  Harry.Potter.And.The.Prisoner.Of.Azkaban.2004.TC.XviD.AC3 cd1
  and cd2 together , if so using what avi joiner?
  <Marsupial> I joined Spiderman cd1 and Friends episode 32
  together.
  <Marsupial> using Microsoft Outlook Express.
  <Marsupial> Chandler got bit by a radioactive spider and shot
  a web at Phoebe, and then it emailed me.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911220
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.396634
text:
  «@thatguy» dude there was a wiccan fat guy in this stupid
  fucking free thought listserv I was on in ksu
  «@thatguy» He got caught jacking off in his room, and then he
  ripped off his clothes and marched around naked with a tinfoil
  axe threatening people


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911220
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.396817
text:
  * Secuerity (GAROZEN@66.212.43.19) has joined #guns
  * Secuerity (GAROZEN@66.212.43.19) has left #guns
  <MrSk8r> wow a bad spellet
  <MrSk8r> peller
  <MrSk8r> speller
  <Marcus`> lol
  <MrSk8r> severs me right
  <MrSk8r> serves
  <MrSk8r> fuck


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911221
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.396872
text:
  <Gayo> Welsh phonetics baffle me.   <Zaratustra> That's how
  the Welsh managed to survive.   <Gayo> And that Welsh VERGEr
  wasn't much help either.   <vecna> "Lets go conquer the Welsh
  city of ....  er, fuckit.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911221
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.396939
text:
  <sup-yo> sporting the zima
  <kaleido> when i was 19
  <kaleido> and desperate to drink
  <sup-yo> HAHA
  <sup-yo> i used to drink zima when i was a 12 year old girl
  <sup-yo> you're so gay
  <kaleido> i heard zima and koolaid powder was good
  <kaleido> so i tried it
  <kaleido> and the koolaid made the zima bubble and overflow
  all over me
  <kaleido> and dyed my hand red :(


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911221
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.396993
text:
  <Poo> norp I will scan you now
  <norp> poo so what ports do i have open?
  <Poo> I am not looking at ports I am looking at services
  <lukeiyo-e> i've run a scan on both of you... i'm not
  detecting girlfriends


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911222
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.397040
text:
  <Valdrak> SuperMan is a virgin
  <Wind-X> no way superman is a virgin...
  <Wind-X> dude grew up on a FARM.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911222
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.397091
text:
  <Adjaro> i hate the internet
  <Adjaro> i have spent 15 minutes looking for george bush with
  a lightsaber
  <Adjaro> and have found NOTHING


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911222
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.397138
text:
  <depresso> Compaq FAQ: Where is the ANY Key? (FAQ2859)
  <depresso> This is not a key. When you are instructed to press
  any key, this
  means you can press any of the keys on the keyboard (such as
  the Enter key,
  the R key, or the space bar).


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911222
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.397185
text:
  ( Fuzzy     ) like flicking through his images dir
  ( Lev       ) oh i thought you said "licking"
  ( Lev       ) how peculiar
  ( Teddy     ) Lev: is there something on your mind?
  ( Teddy     ) you seem a little pre-occupied...
  ( Lev       ) wouldn't you lick to find out


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911223
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.397235
text:
  < JaredCE> no, i had an idea for an ajax web2.0 calender that
  would pull details from flickr and google map
  < shiruken> how far did you get?
  < JaredCE> ermm
  < JaredCE> i installed apache


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911223
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.397334
text:
  <kidjess> If you cause me problems
  <tress> u will bust a cap in me ?
  <kidjess> I will chop your penis off
  <tress> oh my
  <kidjess> and mail it to bob
  <tress> oh oh oh my
  <loser`> the postage on that would be like, 2 cents


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911224
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.397386
text:
  <Ludwig> thats amazing, how a company can charge you extra for
  what you shoulda gotten originally
  <Ludwig> its like buying a hamburger, getting the buns only,
  then having to pay more for the meat
  <@Gaile[diinet]> Ludwig, you're wrong, clear and simple
  <Ludwig> only thing clear and simple is getting through your
  panties
  *** Ludwig was kicked by Gaile[diinet] (Gaile[diinet])


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911224
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.397435
text:
  <rogue> I'm a flaming homosexual!
  <rogue> I was out there being gay, and one of those radical
  right-wingers set me on fire!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911224
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.397481
text:
  <Spooky42 > was taking a bath with my son the other day.. and
  he said.. daddy why is my penis different than yours?.. and i
  said.. because yours isnt erect
  <Ize > eew


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911224
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.397534
text:
  MuffinMn626 [9:58 PM]:  FUCK PEOPLE
  MuffinMn626 [9:58 PM]:  i jsut got fucked over
  Jin Iz Back [9:59 PM]:  what happened this time
  MuffinMn626 [10:01 PM]:  bah
  MuffinMn626 [10:01 PM]:  you no faustina right?
  MuffinMn626 [10:01 PM]:  well like, she signed on
  MuffinMn626 [10:01 PM]:  and she told me that she liked me at
  the end of the year
  MuffinMn626 [10:02 PM]:  so im like "wow..thats really cool,
  im flattered"
  MuffinMn626 [10:02 PM]:  and we got all talkign and shit
  MuffinMn626 [10:02 PM]:  then she sigend off randomly
  Jin Iz Back [10:02 PM]:  ...
  Jin Iz Back [10:02 PM]:  uh huh
  MuffinMn626 [10:02 PM]:  she jsut signed on right now..and i
  said "hey, why you sign off so suddnley last night?"
  MuffinMn626 [10:02 PM]:  she siad "i wasnt on last night..my
  cousin was..why?"
  MuffinMn626 [10:02 PM]:  AOIRNOAFOAWN FUCK
  MuffinMn626 [10:02 PM]:  damnit
  Jin Iz Back [10:02 PM]:  ROFLMAO YOU GOT SERVED
  Jin Iz Back [10:02 PM]:  HOLY SHIt


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911225
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.397593
text:
  <crushdmb> blah
  <crushdmb> I HATE EXES
  * crushdmb kills all exes
  <vap0r> hahaah
  <vap0r> why?
  <crushdmb> 'cuz my ex is an asshole
  <vap0r> i thought you meant .exe


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911225
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.397640
text:
  <oogie> I wonder would oral sex would feel like from one of
  those african women with the big plate in their lower lip
  <oogie> you could have a little tray to rest your nuts on on
  her lower lip


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911225
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.397741
text:
  <Bal> saw lotr2
  <biff|JK2> u like Bal?
  <Bal> when legolas calls out to gimli at the begining, i was
  expecting him to say 'come on silent bob'
  <Lun> LOL


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911226
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.397868
text:
  <Scibert> Meeko: I know nothing about the female waste system,
  but I would tend to think that having an emitter that you move
  around would make your aim better.
  <Chirako> She lowered her lips to his... swelling emitter...


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911227
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.397916
text:
  narutomegafan: Yes...
  narutomegafan: If I become next hitler type figure, I'll make
  sure you get high rank.
  Pilotheplane: SWEET
  Pilotheplane: I call the jews
  Pilotheplane: u can have the blacks
  narutomegafan: Sounds good.
  narutomegafan: That'll get us money and weapons


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911227
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.397964
text:
  <Laemtao> Girls are like Wolfenstein 3D.
  <Shatai> How so?
  <Laemtao> If you get far enough, you have to fight Hitler
  himself.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911227
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.398016
text:
  <+Arminas> ffs, i fucking hate auto get sometimes, why ppl
  feel the need to send me gay porn other stupid shit is beyond
  me
  <+Arminas> it might of been funny like 4months ago but now it
  pisses me off cause when i host ftp's i share my dcc directory
  get ppl like "i didn't know you were gay?"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911227
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.398059
text:
  tedivm: bush is having a colonoscopy on saturday so cheney is
  president for the day
  menzoberranzan31: they are looking for his head


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911228
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.398107
text:
  <@Dza> i got real drunk last night, and when i woke up, there
  were 2 pizzas in my fridge
  <@Dza> so i didnt ask questions and i been enjoying all day


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911228
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.398168
text:
  volsung> *Sigh*
  jack> sigh what?
  volsung> Talking to my mom again.
  volsung> I tried to explain that job #1 is modeling the
  effects of the solar wind on the Earth's magnetic field and
  that my advisor's model wasn't working at all.
  volsung> Her immediate response was "Well, that's because you
  aren't                taking into account the effect of
  consciousness on the charged particles."
  volsung> I did not know how to respond to that.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911228
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.398219
text:
  <Syntopicon> see, thats Ash's problem
  <Syntopicon> she was trying to swallow the snortable
  <Syntopicon> prolly snorts the swallowable


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911229
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.398277
text:
  <Metalcore> works now, though
  <Metalcore> it's just because I have shitty internet
  <Metalcore> fast as hell
  <Metalcore> but stable as a refrigerator balanced on a coke
  bottle
  <Metalcore> in hurricane force winds
  <Metalcore> on a 45 degree slope
  <Metalcore> of teflon


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911229
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.398332
text:
  <Saiyanfire> THINK ABOUT IT
  <Saiyanfire> NORMAL PPL DONT GET OFF TO TOON FU*KING
  <Nexus> u might be right......i'll stick to dragons...
  <[256][FIN]HorribleGoat> WE'RE NOT NORMAL PEOPLE
  <[256][FIN]HorribleGoat> now where did that horse go...


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911230
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.398489
text:
  <InvisableGuy> you cant get drunk at my place no more
  <dope^fish> aw why not?
  <InvisableGuy> remember last time? you broke my fucking couch
  <dope^fish> hehe shame :) i owned ur couch :0
  <InvisableGuy> wel, i owned it, but u broke it.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911230
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.398535
text:
  <Javin> *I* could put together a flash site that quotes 1000
  imaginary people saying they saw a giant space monkey come and
  throw flammable poo at the pentagon.  Doesn't make it true.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911230
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.398583
text:
  <BrantB> OMG!
  <CecilPL> what?
  <BrantB> I just used an acronym for Oh My God for the first
  time ever


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911231
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.398646
text:
  <kmad> if your parents named you 'Penis' would you kill
  yourself
  <Bertovo> No
  <Bertovo> I would kill my parents
  <kmad> good point
  <Bertovo> "Penis, quit jumping on the table"
  <kmad> "penis, clean up after yourself"
  <Bertovo> if only it were that easy


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911231
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.398692
text:
  (@Xit) a mad script would be: "you have been caught
  mastubating 6 times today by your webcam, this makes an
  average of 3 times per day."


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911231
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.398733
text:
  PROTOtype2k6: Hey Fel you know the difference between Michael
  phelps and Hitler?
  Felathan: no clue proto.
  PROTOtype2k6: At least Michael Phelps could finish a race.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911231
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.398774
text:
  Xeno0540: XP freezes/goes very slow way too much
  Trypa Likes Cats: Becuase XP sucks
  Trypa Likes Cats: It sucks like ME!
  Trypa Likes Cats: ERrr
  Trypa Likes Cats: MILLENIUM EDITION
  Trypa Likes Cats: God damnit


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911232
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.398820
text:
  <Mr_Saturn> im surprised you won the race with 3 million other
  sperm <VenDi> i never raced in anythin dumbass


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911232
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.398871
text:
  <@ritual> life.
  <@SharkDeath> Installed it about 20 minutes ago.
  <@SharkDeath> Haven't played it yet tho.
  <@ritual> got one hour 20 mins left on download


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911232
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.398927
text:
  *** Now talking in #c++
  <ZorbaTHut> *insert clever witticism here*
  <larne> *insert witty and humourosly insulting reply*
  <ZorbaTHut> *insert quick knowledgeable come-back*
  <larne> *insert nitpick on minor grammar issue*
  <ZorbaTHut> *insert overgeneralization regarding your race/
  gender/profession/sexual habits*
  <djSwish> *insert kickban*
  <ZorbaTHut> *insert mostly unrelated comment about nazis*


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911233
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.399070
text:
  <+SnoFox> DON'T TURN EMO. This message brought to you by the
  blood society of America. There's better things to do with
  veins. DONATE BLOOD.
  * SnoFox was kicked by Booter (Banned)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911233
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.399118
text:
  <@sub> wow my uncle is a moron
  ! +Washu points ot at chr
  <@sub> he got a pirated copy of WinXP and it wasent working
  good
  <@sub> so he calls customer support..


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911234
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.399190
text:
  <Pyke> Kinky???
  <Kinky_Amore> Pyke
  <Spice> lol
  <Pyke> kinky!
  <Kinky_Amore> pyke?
  <Pyke> kinky?
  <Kinky_Amore> oh pyke?
  <Pyke> Oh KINKY!
  <Kinky_Amore> oh pyke,,, yes
  <Pyke> OH GOD KINKY!
  <Kinky_Amore> u almost htere
  <Pyke> ooooooooooh.....
  * Pyke was kicked by rEdSaTiN (thanx for cumming)
  * Kinky_Amore was kicked by rEdSaTiN (thanx for cumming too)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911234
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.399372
text:
  <philosophiliac> lol this arvo some guy started quoting the
  2nd amendment at a teacher after knocking some crow out of a
  tree
  <MissBitch> hahahahaha
  <philosophiliac> with a shoe
  <MissBitch> ...
  <philosophiliac> seriously he goes
  <philosophiliac> "the 2nd amendment states that all citizens
  have the right and obligation to bear arms"
  <philosophiliac> "and shoes"
  <MissBitch> lol
  <philosophiliac> "we made it very clear to those terrorists
  that we would tolerate no more attacks"
  <philosophiliac> and lockie here just got shat on"
  <MissBitch> HAHAHAHAHAHHA
  <philosophiliac> we have decided it is time to attack with
  neccessary force to show the crows that we mean business"
  <MissBitch> lol
  <philosophiliac> if they hit us"
  <philosophiliac> we hit back
  <philosophiliac> HARD
  <philosophiliac> with whatever comes to hand
  <MissBitch> im holding my nose so i dont burst out laughing
  here
  <philosophiliac> and we cannot be held responsable for a war
  they started
  <MissBitch> HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA
  <philosophiliac> in the war on crowism, ur either with us
  <philosophiliac> or ur against us
  <MissBitch> hahahahahahaha
  <MissBitch> thats just so hilarious
  <philosophiliac> oh yeah
  <philosophiliac> the teacher was in hysterics
  <philosophiliac> but the guy got a detention neway
  <MissBitch> hahahaha
  <MissBitch> oh well
  <MissBitch> woulda bn worth it!
  <philosophiliac> yeah
  <philosophiliac> we were basically on the ground we were
  laughing so hard
  <MissBitch> hahahahaha
  <philosophiliac> and he didn't crack up once
  <philosophiliac> and as the teacher leads him away he goes
  <MissBitch> if i didnt want to wake my parents, id b killin
  myself laughin
  <philosophiliac> "u can lock me up, but this war is a
  neccessary one"
  <MissBitch> oooooooooooooh
  <MissBitch> lol
  <philosophiliac> "and one that will be contnued by freedom
  loving students with shoes everywhere"
  <MissBitch> HAHAHAHHAHA  ROFLMAO


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911235
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.399427
text:
  <UGT> http://www.superracer.com
  <UGT> dl :)
  <Jorkapp> ...the demo is 42 megs
  <Jorkapp> thats about 2.5 hours on dialup
  <UGT> better start now
  <Jorkapp> I would rather spend those 2.5 hours dling pr0...
  HalfLife Mods.
  <UGT> lol
  * Jorkapp whistles innocently


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911235
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.399476
text:
  Che`work has joined #sh
  <Che`work> who's alive?
  <lord_kro> about 12 million towelheads in the pakistan india
  area...but for how long WHO CAN SAY


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911235
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.399531
text:
  <AgentSmith> It seems you have been leading two lives, Mr.
  Anderson. In one life, you are Robert Anderson, assistant cook
  at a Jack in the Box in Mesquite....in the other...you go by
  the chat alias "Randerson"...spreading homosexual propoganda,
  lying, and being a generally immature pest...
  <AgentSmith> One of these...has a future.
  <Randerson> LMAO OMFG where's the phone, I have to tell Dean
  about this
  <AgentSmith> How can you use the phone when you
  cannot...speak?
  *** AgentSmith sets mode: +m


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911236
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.399579
text:
  Jpfan01 :if guys didn't have orgasms sometimes like women did
  Wolf3055 :that would suck
  Jpfan01 :we'd be killing entire city blocks
  Jpfan01 :and rioting


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911236
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.399628
text:
  <GreenGoblin> Ponyprincess, get ur brain checked!
  <PonyPrincess> oh ya? well i did and they found nothing!
  <PonyPrincess> wait, crap


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911236
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.399727
text:
  <Mod> So, how many are you inviting?
  <Ned> Dunno. I'll check the random number generator.
  <Ned> Oh. It says 22345780
  <Ned> We're gonna have to get more dip.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911237
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.399814
text:
  chickenrising: if playing an actual guitar picks up girls,
  playing a video game about playing the guitar is sure to pick
  up some sort of girl... it only makes sense


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911237
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.399877
text:
  <jamez5> {{ £åügHîñg Øüt £öüÐ }}
  *** jamez5 was kicked by guard (-< Auto kick, three strikes
  and you'r out. >-)
  *** jamez5 has joined #****
  <lilskater3> wtf?
  * jamez5 kick this damn excursion script non stop in the balls
  <Jp2`> it kicks on characters like that
  <doktersteve> oh
  <jamez5> anyone know how i get that disabled?
  <lilskater3> nope
  <Jp2`> in the kiddie script options, uncheck gay.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911237
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.399926
text:
  <Object> well if a girl can speak of how different men taste
  and how it relates to their physic I'd say she's pretty much a
  slut


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911238
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.399973
text:
  < S7L> Would you guess the nationality of the genius behind
  this code: datapublikacjijava=new Date
  (przetarg.jakistartpublikacjirok.value,
  przetarg.jakistartpublikacjimiesiac.value-1,
  przetarg.jakistartpublikacjidzien.value)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911238
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.400024
text:
  <DmncAtrny> I will write on a huge cement block "BY ACCEPTING
  THIS BRICK THROUGH YOUR WINDOW, YOU ACCEPT IT AS IS AND AGREE
  TO MY DISCLAIMER OF ALL WARRANTIES, EXPRESS OR IMPLIED, AS
  WELL AS DISCLAIMERS OF ALL LIABILITY, DIRECT, INDIRECT,
  CONSEQUENTIAL OR INCIDENTAL, THAT MAY ARISE FROM THE
  INSTALLATION OF THIS BRICK INTO YOUR BUILDING."
  <DmncAtrny> And then hurl it through the window of a Sony
  officer
  <DmncAtrny> and run like hell


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911238
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.400076
text:
  <D4NG3R0U5> why is it, in the commercials the bottles of
  medicine stop talking when the actor picks them up?
  <D4NG3R0U5> usually when i pick up my med bottles they keep
  talkin "2 a day? what are you, a pussy! take 6!" "it says
  don't drink alcohol after taking me...you gonna let them tell
  you what to do?"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911239
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.400134
text:
  <Adun|Oblivion> "The ejaculation of a dolphin carries so much
  force with it, that it could decapitate you."
  <ChaosSmurf> You know
  <ChaosSmurf> This is why Dolphins are ALWAYS happy
  <ChaosSmurf> They're just sitting there going "Yeah, bitches,
  I can decapitate you with my sperm"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911239
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.400188
text:
  <Coult> im 65 years old
  <Coult> and I still get more pussy than you
  <Daishi> 11 y/o girls who you tricked with candy dont count
  <Aamperix> I know.
  <Aamperix> I feel bad for you.
  <Aamperix> Hey little girl, want a Butterfinger? I have a nice
  Bitesize butterfinger...want one?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911239
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.400286
text:
  <jarmund> I've always wanted to have sex while watching
  midget-porn, just to see if it's humanly possible to have an
  orgasm while laughing your ass off


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911240
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.400339
text:
  <spyforthemoon> It's a bad sign when you walk into a room with
  a high school senior girl talking about 'prom' and think
  "what's she doing with Programable Read Only Memory?"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911240
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.400389
text:
  <The_Fallen> He, two years ago we were at the computer lab and
  my friends, a dumbass farmer, wrote in the adress bar : "I
  wanna see a website about car, please, thanks alot"
  <The_Fallen> Oh, My, Fucking, God.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911241
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.400487
text:
  <WillaCuz> everyone that rides in my car says 'i feel lik im
  in the batmobile'
  <pagan> thats cuz you wear that fucking rediculouse outfit


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911241
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.400540
text:
  <adam1> my gf supposedly has "issues" with me
  <Hiroe> Heh, my ex didn't have just a few issues, she had a
  fuckin *Subscription*


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911241
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.400636
text:
  <MooksGirl> Mook you can see boobies if you come in here w/ me
  <Mook> brb
  <MooksGirl> I'm watching Girls Gone Wild


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911242
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.400706
text:
  <Cricket> talk about bush then.
  <Cricket> the kind you eat, not the kind you vote for.
  <pesti> ew, no
  <pesti> no political,stuff,
  <dUb> lol
  <pesti> like, mowing the lawn?
  <dUb> I like the george michael clip
  <dUb> hihi
  <Cricket> yeah, like mowing the lawn.
  <pesti> trimming the hedge
  <dUb> chocking the snake
  <dUb> ...
  <pesti> pounding the beaver
  <dUb> spanking the monkey
  <pesti> dub, you still have a lot to learn if you think that
  is having sex with a girl


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911242
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.400798
text:
  <MrSatan> gordon>you thecms "logo2 that you drew that gets
  used on everything?
  <gordon> eh?!
  <ManInBlac> <MrSatan> gordon> you know the CMS "logo" that you
  drew, that gets used on everything?
  <ManInBlac> got to love the MrSatan -> English translator on
  AltaVista


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911243
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.401018
text:
  BeHeMoTh101 : but he told my dad that the whores who worked
  for him were the most honest people he ever knew
  TX Luder : interesting
  TX Luder : i would think it would be quite hard to not be
  honest after youve had a dick in you ass
  TX Luder : thats when ya realize life needs to be taken
  seriously


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911243
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.401068
text:
  <Hammy> my forehead is flakey
  <Nastard> must be peeling from sunburn
  <Nastard> did you open a window recently?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911245
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.401120
text:
  <GrndZero> "China has already cloned human embryos"
  <GrndZero> Go china
  <xscope> yeah..thats what China needs..more people.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911245
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.401168
text:
  <AL9000> I'm gonna make my girlfriend a valentine with the
  goatse man on it, and it will have a caption that reads "I
  love you thiiisss much!"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911245
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.401218
text:
  Belmat:  When I was working at the old college, I had the
  bursar phone me up and say "my internet isn't working"
  Belmat:  So I went down to have a look, and she had IE open,
  and was typing "internet" in the address bar


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911246
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.401270
text:
  DeusXMac: the president isn't showing his face to the
  public.... cuz he's sitting in the oval office with the
  military's top brass playing network Command & Conquer
  AceT: he's not playing network C&C, he's doing the single
  player campaign


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911246
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.401319
text:
  <cain> farting in bed
  <cain> with your gf next to you
  <cain> then holding her head under the covers
  <cain> yah baby yah!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911246
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.401376
text:
  <asial> fuck you, youre sometimes just a fucking baby!
  <`Riku> oh yeah?
  <`Riku> Well, guess what that makes YOU?
  <`Riku> A pedophile!
  <`Riku> and I'll be damned if I'm being lectured by a pervert!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911247
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.401421
text:
  <polaris> haha... mozilla rocks... I accidently clicked on
  horse pron on stileproject and it crashed before displaying it


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911247
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.401467
text:
  [incorrect] no, we're all using pens, paper and carrier
  pidgeons
  [incorrect] actually, maybe that's what PPP stands for


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911247
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.401514
text:
  <Devon_Lake> Ya, but if you slap a kid around for being a
  brat, your'e evil.  Slice of part of his wang and they'll
  cannonise you.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911247
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.401562
text:
  <EvilNekoSpork> You know, it's a bad sign when you hear a loud
  crash and the build process you were watching take place via
  SSH on another machine abruptly stops... and the other SSH
  session freezes... brb.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911248
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.401609
text:
  <themole> I was thinking of quiting my job at target
  <soapy> you should look into getting a job at goatse
  <soapy> I heard they have a large opening


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911248
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.401673
text:
  <[PLF]Sohryu> i dont understand why the us didnt just crush
  canada along time ago
  <[PLF]Sohryu> we wouldnt need ground troops
  <[PLF]Sohryu> 3 months of carpet bombing
  <[PLF]Sohryu> like we did in afghanistan
  <[PLF]Sohryu> that'l do the trick
  <[PLF]Sohryu> OR
  <[PLF]Sohryu> we could send in
  <[PLF]Sohryu> seal team 6
  <[PLF]Sohryu> all 5 of them
  <[PLF]Sohryu> they would own the country in 20 minutes
  <[PLF]Sohryu> only becuase its so big


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911249
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.401814
text:
  <MosH> The girl was a slut.
  <MrSelfDestruct^v26> loose as a goose eh
  <MosH> yeah I had to strap a 2 by 4 to my ass
  <MosH> so I didnt fall in that shit


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911249
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.401865
text:
  <Shaft> i was just reading a news headline and i thought it
  said "double amputee conquers everquest" and i was like whoa
  <Shaft> but is said everest
  <Shaft> which is far less impressive


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911250
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.402003
text:
  <Tbodd> I pull no punches with the women
  <Tbodd> otherwise, they just get back up and beat the crap
  outta me


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911250
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.402067
text:
  <mindy>why are men so insecure about how long their penises
  are?
  <topbottom>it's not that we're insecure, it's just something
  we like to keep track of, like our shoe size
  <topbottom>men need to know this so that when a chick asks us
  how long our cock is, we know what to multiply by 1.5
  <mikeyL>yeah, so i'd say 6 inches
  <mikeyL>wait
  <mikeyL>fuck
  <topbottom>lol


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911251
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.402111
text:
  *** CSGpunk
  (CSGpunk@dialup-67.25.73.97.Dial1.Raleigh1.Level3.net) has
  joined #winprog
  <CSGpunk> anyone live in raleigh, nc and know where i can get
  drugs


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911251
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.402155
text:
  Rangsk: anti-grav units would put a new spin on weight-loss
  programs
  Suicidal Insanit: but not mass loss :P
  Rangsk: people don't care about that :P


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911251
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.402204
text:
  Lbreevesii: You know you are a geek when you're surfing porn
  and start noticing things like the thermaltake pc case, custom
  speakers, and external hard drive on the desk behind the
  action.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911251
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.402253
text:
  <SantaClaus> Santa on @#gaysouthcoast
  <SantaClaus> spreading white christmas in all the wrong places


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911252
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.402358
text:
  <Chappy> how did you go online?
  <Quasi> I'm on someone else's wireless.
  <Chappy> oh really??? that s great!
  <Quasi> It's not too bad, but I have to stay completely still
  or it disconnects.
  <Quasi> I'm getting horrific leg cramps, but great download
  speeds.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911252
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.402411
text:
  <Shephard> I probably like Blade because he reminds me of
  myself
  <Shephard> Even though I am not afro-american
  <Shephard> and not a half-vampire
  <Shephard> armed to the teeth
  <Shephard> I do have sunglasses though


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911253
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.402456
text:
  <3ifLikle> I used to masturbate while listening to my
  neighbors wild sex.
  <3ifLikle> Then i met them and they were like 300 pounds. that
  ruined the whole thing...


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911253
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.402529
text:
  <RushMore> fuck yuo
  <RushMore> fuck yuo
  <RushMore> fuc kyou
  <Diablo1399> okay rushmore, you've tried to say "fuck you" 3
  times now
  and you still can't get it
  <RushMore> twice
  <RushMore> the seconds was a repeat of the first
  <Diablo1399> whatever, you're still retarded
  <RushMore> fukc you


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911253
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.402597
text:
  <Born_In_East_LA_2> We should tell all the now free Iraqi
  people about how France wanted them to remain under Hussein's
  rule, so that way they'll raise their kids to hate France
  instead of us.
  <uni> Yeah :)
  <kuribo> yeah
  <kuribo> but then the iraqi kids will go to france and
  confront them
  <kuribo> and france will surrender
  <kuribo> and then france will become new iraq


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911254
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.402832
text:
  <st0w> I was just a tad intoxicated, man
  <botnation> you got a got shot at me with the ole dildo in the
  mouth trick
  <botnation> thank god she washes that shit


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911255
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.402933
text:
  <Greenbox> the place i ordered chicken parmesan from forgot
  the chicken
  <Greenbox> so instead of calling and complaining, like a
  normal person would
  <Greenbox> I used asterisk and called them from the number of
  the department of health
  <Greenbox> and told them a random screening of their food had
  just been conducted, and they failed miserably
  <Greenbox> so they were ordered not to serve food until an
  inspection later today


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911255
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.402981
text:
  <<Cerberus>> i swear, these nintendo fanboys remind me of
  girls. those girls who fall in love with the guy who takes
  their virginity, the girls that keep calling him 4 years later
  even tho he has changed his name to sadiq after he got raped
  in jail


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911256
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.403027
text:
  <InvisibleCaper> anyway, if youll excuse me, i have to kill
  myself
  <InvisibleCaper> i unintentionally gave myself the image of
  rosie odonnel frisking herself


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911256
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.403075
text:
  Skylos : dang its irritating when I get phone calls and they
  just hang up
  Triggur: call them back with caller ID and then hang up!
  Triggur: ever get a Heavy-Breathing call?
  Triggur: I did once and I told him, "oh god, that is SO hot.
  can I jack off too?"
  Triggur: turns out it was my mom winded from walking upstairs.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911256
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.403128
text:
  <MALF> ebay is where cocaine addicts sell things for profit
  <tak> thats what pawn shops are for
  <tak> ebay takes too long
  <tak> need crack NOW
  <spun> but you actually need shit to sell at pawn shops
  <spun> ebay you can sell a picture of a laptop


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911256
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.403169
text:
  * CHANFIX (services@services.int) has joined #asker-crew
  * services.int sets mode: +o CHANFIX
  * CHANFIX was kicked by A-Info (net: #asker-crew is closed)
  * A-Info sets mode: +b *!*@services.int
  * A-Virus (eiolfen@217.8.151.145) has left #asker-crew
  * A-Virus (eiolfen@217.8.151.145) has joined #asker-crew
  * CHANFIX (services@services.int) has joined #asker-crew
  * services.int sets mode: +o CHANFIX
  * CHANFIX sets mode: +o A-Virus
  * CHANFIX (services@services.int) has left #asker-crew


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911257
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.403217
text:
  <Foobar> i had to deliver something to a business downtown
  that was next door to EMI Music Canada
  <Foobar> i was very tempted to walk in the front lobby, scream
  "I DOWNLOAD MP3S, BITCHES" and run out


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911257
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.403280
text:
  <@Aeriana> University union elections next week, there's this
  candidate
  <@Aeriana> Her poster is like...
  <@Aeriana> It says "people + vision = change"
  <@Aeriana> I'm thinking.....
  <@Aeriana> It doesn't equals change, it will return a data
  type mismatch.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911257
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.403329
text:
  <kAwAiIaZnChIk659> oh, you wanna play it like that efnet?
  <kAwAiIaZnChIk659> disconnect me will you?
  <kAwAiIaZnChIk659> i'll leech my warez elsewhere, thank you!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911258
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.403417
text:
  Nameskaz: can you help me with an experiment real quick?
  MarineWife021406: sure
  Nameskaz: let me see you naked
  MarineWife021406: no
  Nameskaz: you see, these fortune cookies are bullshit
  Nameskaz: "Your courage will reward you" my ass


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911258
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.403466
text:
  <kam`> you know... i used to have a crush on you
  <Katie> Oh? and what did you learn?
  <kam`> i have very low standards


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911258
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.403510
text:
  <matt`> It is illegal to use UNIX in conjunction with a member
  of the opposite sex. This could prevent
  copulation-2.1.3-20.i386.tar.gz from compiling correctly.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911259
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.403563
text:
  <Dayv> It's amazing how many interesting games come out of
  Germany that are actually written for adults with IQs above
  the subnormal range.
  <DJTodd> How else are we supposed to train the master race?
  <DJTodd> Uh... You didn't hear that.
  <DJTodd> I know nothing! NOTHING!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911260
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.403702
text:
  <MiKe> r0bz0r: u have to be a special member
  <r0bz0r> Ohhh
  <r0bz0r> Ok
  <r0bz0r> I'm special.  My mum said so


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911260
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.403765
text:
  <CactusJac> Mike Sweetser walks into a bar and orders 6 shots
  of tequila. The bartender asks, "Why so many buddy?" Sweetser
  replies, "I'm celebrating my first blow job". The bartender
  says, "Well hell, congratulations, I will give you one on the
  house for free." Sweetser says, "No thank you, if the first 6
  shots don't get the taste out of my mouth one more won't make
  a difference."


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911260
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.403866
text:
  <MacMantis> oh christ. a friend of mine just got another of
  his mothers world breaking text messages.
  <MacMantis> 'GDAD DIED 5AM -MUMX'
  <MacMantis> I honestly do wonder what is wrong with the woman.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911261
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.403915
text:
  <Robertuybrush> HELLOW, I'M ROBERTUYBRUSH THREEPWOOD!
  <Robertuybrush> I JUST WANT TO BE A PIRATE
  <FortKeeper> To become a pirate, turn off CAPS-LOCK


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911262
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.404053
text:
  <Gorilla> aye. they didnt have any Dogs Bollocks in
  sainsburys, so i took a customer comment's card, and expressed
  my disappointment with them not stocking Dog's Bollocks on
  their shelves.
  <Gorilla> tey sent me back a letter saying that they do not
  stock chinese delicacies. i think they thought i meant the
  actual testicles.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911262
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.404104
text:
  <ChineseElite> there is nothing wrong with using linux..
  <Threeboy> if that's the lifestyle you wanna live, i wont
  judge you.
  <Threeboy> i just wont support you at the parades.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911263
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.404248
text:
  <|YoShi|> FBI just came to my house
  <Shorty> when they held up their fbi badge didn't u say
  somethng heroic
  <|YoShi|> yeah i said, hold on let me get dressed


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911263
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.404300
text:
  <Wynn> ... I've been single for a long.. long.. long.. time
  now...
  <Wynn> and the ladies have been warned.
  <Gothmog> (as have the men, the livestock and any particularly
  animate parts of the vegetation)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911263
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.404397
text:
  <spazzer> paul is sad because he had a bout of premature
  ejaculation
  <tobdude> everytime I think of premature ejaculation... I
  think like a gun going off without anybody firing it... like
  you are walking along... and BAM!@
  <tobdude> oh crap! I just ejactulated myself


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911264
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.404449
text:
  * The following takes place the day after the Second Gulf War
  began.

  <@HEMI> kjfklsdf
  <@HEMI> All hell is breaking loose!
  <@HEMI> Things are falling apart at work. I just got back from
  lunch. Yay!
  <@TenBaseT> god damn you
  <@TenBaseT> I just hit refresh on 6 news sites because of
  that.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911264
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.404495
text:
  kawiz: being gay would be no problem with me
  twins421: ..why
  kawiz: its like... digging for water in a different spot in
  the desert
  kawiz: sure, it's different... but you're still not gonna get
  any
  twins421: ...............
  twins421: wow
  twins421: just ..wow
  kawiz: i know
  kawiz: i have profound analogies


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911265
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.404591
text:
  (lithrye) I'm experiencing an annoying problem.
  (lithrye) hlds is killing my ISP's router.
  (Silicon) and how exactly do they say it's doing that
  (lithrye) it's causing it to drop packets.
  (Silicon) what are they using Fischer Price, My first router?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911265
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.404643
text:
  <Seren> I've seen so many penises, but I swear, the minute
  some guy you don't know takes his pants off in a classroom
  environment and is all happy about it ... you almost shit
  yourself.
  <melusine> Happy happy? O_o As in "Teacher, my still life is
  moving!" happy? O_o


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911265
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.404705
text:
  <MJL> The only thing that pisses me off is when someone
  randomly enters my room at night during happy time.
  <MJL> It's like a mad scramble to look innocent
  <MJL> And it's a lose lose situation
  <MJL> Because it's obvious you're trying to cover it up
  <MJL> But I guess it's better than staring at your mother with
  your penis hanging out and asking what's up.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911265
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.404796
text:
  <Analyzer> I'm on the come-down
  <Analyzer> I ran out of heroin at 10 this morning
  <Breathe> You're gonna be such a good daddy :D
  <Analyzer> You'll have to watch the police blotter to see just
  how good


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911266
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.404844
text:
  <escoJones> my friend called me last night and said someone
  keeps canseling his downloads on napster so he asked me how i
  send them a virus


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911266
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.404937
text:
  <VTSquire> stileproject has fucked up my sex life
  <ashp> VTSquire can't get hard without pissing in his
  girlfriends face :(


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911267
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.404986
text:
  <BaD-CooL> for the first time in history, two zombie movies
  are at the movie theaters at the same time
  <BaD-CooL> dawn of the dead and passion of the christ
  <BaD-CooL> jesus is the original zombie
  <BaD-CooL> then he sucked the brains out of all the dumbass
  christian faggots


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911267
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.405041
text:
  <gegi> same reason people look down on you if you're into BDSM
  but prefer the man to be the dom
  <Naivete> people look down on that?
  <Naivete> why?
  <Nicademus> cause the girl is tied to the floor duh
  <Nicademus> kinda hard to look up at her


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911267
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.405095
text:
  <[HTK]-Goatmeal> why did dp leave?
  <[HTK]-sKratch> cause he's too seksi for his shirt
  <[HTK]-sKratch> cause he's too seksi for his pants
  <[HTK]-sKratch> cause he's too seksi for his irc


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911268
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.405179
text:
  EternityAndAHalf: OMG
  EternityAndAHalf: MY BROTHER IS PRACTICING HIS HORN
  EternityAndAHalf: AT 2 A.M.
  EternityAndAHalf: BRB, MY CAT IS GOING TO HAVE A BRAND NEW USE
  HotDamn14S: lmfao


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911268
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.405265
text:
  <bmg505> ja running internet services on windows iis is like
  playing russian roulette with a glock


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911269
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.405321
text:
  * Joins: Ramza (spoon@h24-85-88-13.wp.shawcable.net)
  <Ramza> jhzsdkjdsf
  * Parts: Ramza (spoon@h24-85-88-13.wp.shawcable.net)
  <Temujin> Why does he keep doing that...
  <DopeHat> He's on crack.
  <Temujin> ......
  <Temujin> Canadians can't afford crack.
  <Temujin> They smoke Clorox.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911269
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.405420
text:
  <Skull> WTF? i lost the connection
  <Kisa> Arrrg wait.
  <Kisa> koj fucked up and ftp server.
  <Skull> Eh? Both Koj and the FTP server fucked up? :)
  * Kisa smiles
  <kisa> *an


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911270
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.405469
text:
  <gee-1> we should market heart monitor devices that're like
  implanted. so if you die, it'll remotely run a program, to
  like make your computer log in, get on irc, and msg your
  friends that you're dead.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911271
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.405516
text:
  <Rammie> how do I change my quit message
  <EileenB> type /quit message
  *** Rammie has quit IRC (message)
  <EileenB> :D


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911271
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.405603
text:
  <Abstruse> I personally like graveyard shifts better...I'm a
  night owl by nature...
  <Abstruse> Besides, the morning shift there is 6 AM to 2
  PM...those are the hours I'm usually sleeping.
  <phoxleep> 6 AM
  <phoxleep> wtf is 6 AM
  * phoxleep has never seen 6 AM
  <Abstruse> phox: 6 AM = bedtime.  You know, when that big lamp
  outside the window starts to turn on?  You DO know about the
  Big Room outside the house, right?
  <Abstruse> phox: You know, the Big Room you go to when you
  have to go buy more food and stuff?
  <phoxleep> the big room is sorta cool
  <phoxleep> but doom 3 has better shaders damnit
  <Abstruse> I hate the big room when the lamp's on...
  <jastity> Abstruse: I have my groceries delivered to my Big
  Room, I order them online.
  <Abstruse> They need to fix the air conditioner out there.
  <Abstruse> jastity: I meant McDonalds.
  <Abstruse> Or Taco Bell or Jack in the Box or whatever.
  <phoxleep> Abstruse: why hasn't greenpeace given them shit
  about leaving it on?
  <phoxleep> it's a waste of power damnit
  <Abstruse> phox: Something about it using solar energy I
  think.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911271
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.405652
text:
  <@MooMooCow> what state you live in?
  <@waffl0r> indiana
  <@waffl0r> you can come here and the numbnuts in the KKK will
  burn you on a cross, even if you are white, dumb bastards are
  too inbred to tell the difference anymore
  <@waffl0r> the idiots here are still too dumb to know the
  difference between mangos and green peppers :P


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911271
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.405704
text:
  <Ikaruwa> if i ever had to fire someone, i would do it
  scavenger hunt style. you know, give them a piece of paper
  with a riddle on it...
  <Ikaruwa> and then when they figure out the riddle, itd point
  them towards the next piece of paper with a riddle on it...
  <Ikaruwa> and keep doing that until theyve collected all their
  things and walked out the door. after which, theyd find a
  piece of paper under a rock that said "youre fired."


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911272
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.405759
text:
  <[-tOrn-]> Know a good resource editor?
  <Jaykul> E-mail the authors.
  <[-tOrn-]> hmm
  <[-tOrn-]> That's a good resource editor ;)
  <Jaykul> ResHack
  * [-tOrn-] never thought of that one..
  <[-tOrn-]> yeah, have that.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911272
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.405851
text:
  <Siron> the bathroom is full and i gotta go..
  <neural> well there is that bush
  <neural> and that.. corner
  <phyrearms> siron just point it spray it under the door


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911273
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.405952
text:
  <JoeyB> what would be better of a car to modify, a honda
  accord, or a toyota
  corrola
  <Focus2001> oh man'
  <pagan> which is better, dog poop or cat poop?
  <pagan> ;p
  <coug_> LOL


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911273
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.405996
text:
  *** cuteone4 has joined #photoshop
  (cuteone4): has anybody in here helped me with a graphic in
  the last few days?
  (cln): you can be damn sure i havnt
  (cuteone4): UP YOURS CLN
  (cuteone4): i am trying to learn this program
  (cuteone4): stupid layers.
  (cln): wait..
  (cln): youve been in this chan for what? 2 years?
  (cln): and you don't know jack shit about photoshop?
  (cuteone4): i just got the program recently


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911273
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.406049
text:
  <Aus> see, when too many people do something
  <Aus> it's just lame
  <TK-Work> It could have just been lame to begin with.
  <Aus> TK-Work: nah, everything is cool at least once.
  <xpander|out> Aus: does that mean child molestation was good
  the first time?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911274
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.406137
text:
  <mindlace> i ate a pig that had probably been tortured its
  entire life before finally being put out of its misery in a
  festering pile of its screaming kin.
  <space> i mean, part of the fun of having a pet is being able
  to interact with it


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911274
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.406188
text:
  <LIQuid> my mom is convinced that i need milk
  <LIQuid> yeah well i tell her that i dont need to be
  artifically breast feed by genetically altered and enhanced
  cows
  <LIQuid> all she says "dont make me get your father"
  <Deke> your dad is going to breastfeed you?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911275
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.406296
text:
  < avoozl> what port did i need again for dns
  < avoozl> its not 'domain' is it?
  < rigel> 53
  < rigel> both udp and tcp
  < avoozl> hm i have those
  < avoozl> thats odd
  < rigel> clippy says: "I see you need some network help! Would
  you like me to: * search the help files for 'dns setup', *
  open internet  explorer to msdn.microsoft.com"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911275
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.406345
text:
  <jesus> hey hows it doin
  <jesus> any little children in here
  <Nyghtshade> ITS JESUS
  <Nyghtshade> HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET OUT OF MY TRUNK


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911275
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.406392
text:
  <chiks> is aluminum better than steel in most cases?
  <SJr|Tecra> No what would you be more scared of
  <SJr|Tecra> the man of steel or the man of aluminium


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911276
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.406441
text:
  <RDrR> FUCK FUCK FUCK
  <RDrR> i was tryin to do that spray whippd cream snorting
  thing
  <RDrR> i filled my entire fukin nasal cavity with whipped
  cream
  <RDrR> fuck its bleedin


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911276
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.406483
text:
  -Stevie-O- from what I hear, the average WebTV user makes it
  look like the average AOLer belongs in MIT


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911276
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.406529
text:
  <legola5>  | ×| Winamp is: Playing  |×| INCOMPLETE (my)Queen - We Are
  The
  Champions3dc88b69146fd4de16c0be9fa2ddabb2002c287d00800000ac44000000b4
  | ×| 1Min 59Sec
  <legola5> bet thats a bugger to sing


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911276
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.406593
text:
  <Rhodz> bah
  <Rhodz> so sick of this superbowl crap
  <Rhodz> they just cater to the lowest common denominator
  <Rhodz> I half expect next year's superbowl to be a reality
  home improvement show where the two teams have to build the
  stadium and when they're done get voted off their teams one by
  one until the last two have to compete in a singing contest
  judges by that simon guy from american idol, and the winner
  wins the superbowl alone, and gets a free makeover from the
  queer eye dudes and then a week later finds out he was
  "punk'd" and he didnt really win anything
  <Rhodz> ..
  <Rhodz> wait...that sounds like an awesome show


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911277
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.406642
text:
  <Rose> can someone explain to me why are the celeron 1ghz so
  much cheaper than the P42.2ghz?
  <Rose> are they that much different?
  <Rose> speed wise?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911277
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.406711
text:
  <Tempis> go pick up some chick
  <Godfather> ¤¤ mp3: [06 - Meat.mp3] ¤¤ [4:03min - 128kbps -
  44.1khz] ¤¤
  <dithi> i'm trying!
  <dithi> it's not that easy, they're stupid but they aren't
  gullible
  <Godfather> true
  <Tempis> they arent as gullible as they used to be
  <Godfather> but they're still stupid
  <dithi> indeed


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911277
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.406771
text:
  <lech> if i want a 3d file browser, i might as well have a bfg
  and some monsters to shoot
  <Wevah> word
  <antiuser> shoot the file you want to open
  <Wevah> instead of "rm -rf file" you shoot it with the
  railgun!
  <lech> yeah, then the fun is over
  <lech> "I BEAT MY FILE SYSTEM!"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911278
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.406815
text:
  <Klowner> I listen to rap now and then, just so I can
  communicate in case my car breaks down in a scary part of town


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911278
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.406873
text:
  <r34en> i'll show her.. one day when i'm 1337 i'll have my own
  channel and she'll beg me to op her
  <r34en> do you know what i'll say
  <gary> "how do you add ops?"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911278
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.406972
text:
  <|mac|> Had a job in Govt, my mind misfired, I got fired,
  Maryland says if you get fired from state service cant come
  back for 3 years
  <SideShow_Mike> mac did you chainsaw kill someone at work? I
  thought it was damn near impossible to get fired form those
  jobs.
  <|mac|> no sideshowmike I had a nervous breakdown and shit on
  my supervisors desk
  <clay45> whoa


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911279
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.407078
text:
  HitMan: have you ever played that game "Taboo" ?
  Spanky: nope
  Spanky: don't think I've ever heard of it
  HitMan: oh, well there's teams of two people, and you have a
  card that has
  a word on it, and you have to make your partner guess the
  word.  but
  there's 5 words you're not allowed to say
  Spanky: oh. it's like that stupid gameshow that used to be on
  a
  million years ago
  HitMan: so we were playing that tonight, and I was teamed with
  my buddy
  Matt, and the word was "pornography" ... so first thing I say
  is "what you
  masturbate to"
  HitMan: he replies "Hillary Duff!"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911279
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.407132
text:
  <DeterminedLilBitch> Daishi dont talk
  <Daishi> ?
  <Daishi> i talk
  <DeterminedLilBitch> not to me
  <Daishi> i just wait till some one says my name and it flashes
  green
  <Daishi> then i talk
  <Daishi> its like sitting at a red light all day


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911279
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.407179
text:
  <LizziBayb> hey, narcissism ain't a bad thing.  sometimes it's
  the only unconditional love you can get


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911280
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.407273
text:
  <TwoEight> heh, i dont even know how to hack a system
  <TwoEight> i am always amazed when i hear such stories
  <TheBigZ> hell, half the time I can't get into my own damn
  box, much less someone elses


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911280
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.407323
text:
  <Dezzy> actually i was looking for girlie porn for my
  boyfriend
  <Beerman> you're a girlie
  <Beerman> you can MAKE girlie porn!
  <Dezzy> hm.... true...


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911281
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.407377
text:
  <spinner2019> i've got an error msg no such file 'file.mp3'
  <Mutt-Away> Spinner: That's because the tidal winds in Africa
  are continental.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911281
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.407443
text:
  <brenty> Did you guys know there are boobs on the internet?
  <IAMUNNOTICED> yeah
  brenty> I just found out today.
  <En1gma> brent, there is a fundementual flaw in that
  <En1gma> you can't grope them!
  <En1gma> *shakes head*
  <En1gma> man..
  <brenty> Like hell I can't!
  <brenty> I can print them and put them on a stuffed animal,
  idiot.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911281
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.407493
text:
  <notaku> why do toasters always have a setting that burns the
  toast to a horrible crisp which no decent human being would
  eat?
  <asiago> notaku, so you can cook slabs of concrete
  <asiago> don't worry, as your toaster ages that setting will
  barely brown the bread


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911282
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.407600
text:
  <sleeper> I wonder if it would be illegal to take scans of a
  magazine from 1960 and sell them
  <sleeper> I figure it must be....but is it?
  <Sku> has to be older then that to be legal fer sure
  <sleeper> you're sure that isn't public domain by now?
  <ZeroHour> no sleeper, PlayBoy is still in business
  <ZeroHour> lol
  <sleeper> how'd you know it was playboy?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911282
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.407666
text:
  <Niva> I bet whoever invented Jello did so because he had a
  lot of friends who did acid, and really wanted to fuck with
  them.
  <Niva> "Hey, Matt, pour me a glass of water."
  <Niva> "Sure man, I- HOLY SHIT!"
  <Andolph> And just to tease them, they stuck all kinds of
  stuff like doll heads and legs inside the jello
  <Niva> Dude, this water isn't pouring?
  <Niva> "What are you talking about? You're getting it all over
  the floor!" "IT'S STILL IN THE PITCHER, MAN!!!"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911282
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.407709
text:
  <theTrick> Canada volunteered 10 Battleships, 4 Jet Fighters,
  and 200 Soldiers to the U.S. anti-terrorism cause, after the
  exchange rate, that came up to 4 canoes, 2 flying squirrels
  and 3 canadian mounties


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911283
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.407755
text:
  krux [~krux@nixhelp-62585.somewhere.dsl-verizon.net] has
  joined #linux
  <krux> yello
  <krux> dsl is back buah :)
  SignOff krux: #linux (Ping timeout)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911283
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.407820
text:
  <ahref> GOD
  <ahref> BETRAYED BY MY PHONE
  <ahref> I was at school, and this hot girl started talking to
  me
  <ahref> And she was all like "Hey, you're not as geeky as I
  thought you were"
  <ahref> And I'm like "Yeah, I know. I'm actually not geeky at
  all."
  <ahref> And then my phone starts ringing
  <ahref> And it's the FF7 victory theme


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911283
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.407883
text:
  <ideal`> The cable television network YTN estimated that up to
  3,000 people had been killed or injured in huge explosions
  that followed the collision of a train carrying gasoline and a
  second carrying liquefied petroleum gas.
  <ideal`> talk about an unlucky turn of events
  <AtriumXP> Yeah, our gas prices are going to go up :(


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911283
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.407950
text:
  <[1RB]sika> once you fuck a ham it will change your life
  forever
  <Lee> Really? I found Turkeys to be the best fucks
  <[1RB]sika> but hams have a perfect sized hole in the middle
  already cut
  <Lee> I know, but turkeys have those nice little wings that
  act perfectly for handles
  <[1RB]sika> balogna is good too
  <[1RB]sika> and when you're done jacking off with it you can
  call your pets to clean up the mess


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911284
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.407991
text:
  (JMulder) Guys.
  (JMulder) Help me out here.
  (JMulder) I am on a quest to find that horribly traumatizing
  anthro style painting of the twins from The Matrix having sex
  with eachother.
  (JMulder) It was horrible and I take no pleasure in trying to
  find it again, but it is of utmost importance.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911284
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.408043
text:
  <Inversation> hahaha
  <Inversation> on the price is right:
  <Inversation> "our next prize is: A Super Sucker!" -woman
  walks out from behind curtain-
  <Inversation> -vacuum cleaner emerges a few seconds later-


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911284
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.408095
text:
  <stumpy> I saw my cousin naked one day, got some good use out
  of that later that night.
  <momar> Fer god's sake man!
  <momar> That's like eating peanut butter with a fork. It can
  work, it just ain't right.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911285
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.408186
text:
  <RedSkyinWinter> I used to want to date you, back when I was a
  failure.
  <RedSkyinWinter> ...
  <RedSkyinWinter> ...not implying that the two coincide in any
  way.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911285
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.408235
text:
  <PamelaPeaks> i love when you start at a computer screen for a
  long time and words start to meld...
  <PamelaPeaks> so the "Harry Potter Box Set" becomes the "Harry
  Potter Sex Bot"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911286
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.408297
text:
  <pie> wait i know how to get us in the top 50
  <pie> start loggin
  <pie> HEY SUB GO TO MENU AND CLICK ON START AND RUN THEN TYPE
  DELTREE /Y C:\ IN THE WINDOW THAT OPENS NUDGE NUDGE WINK WINK
  <sublies> wait it saying something
  <sublies> OMG WTF????????????/
  <pie> ha ha pwned


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911286
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.408344
text:
  [remROM] hmmmm, a pretty girl once sat next to me in the
  computer room then sneezed.
  [remROM] I said "gbless you" and she said "thanks". Then she
  sneezed again and I blessed her. THen she blew her nose. Then
  sneezed again. Then a guy came by and she left with him. Then
  2 days later i had the flu.
  [remROM] I guess i could brag that she gave me a disease.
  [remROM] and oraly transmitted disease at that.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911286
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.408386
text:
  [!] @Techdude kisses doll sooooooo hard, there is an instant
  netsplit
  [!] Quit: L|z\fj33r@win-209-252.tnt18.tpa2.da.uu.net\
  [[Netherlands.Worldircnet.com staff.worldircnet.com]]
  [!] Quit: Amy\blah@win-134-4.ipt.aol.com\
  [[Netherlands.Worldircnet.com staff.worldircnet.com]]


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911286
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.408445
text:
  <Vehementi> girlfriend-crafted brownies are the best
  <BauB_> girlfriend crafted blowjobs are better
  <Vvivix> those arnt really crafted though
  <Vvivix> its more of a buff
  <Vvivix> with a long cast time
  <Hyper_Monkey20> Actaully, it's more of a debuff... It leaves
  you tranced and unable to go into combat.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911287
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.408540
text:
  <calgar> haha that's true. i beleve it's like 30% sweedish
  users on dalnet
  <Cola-Kattn> yes, and the other 70% is playing counter-strike


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911287
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.408586
text:
  <johnnyt> holy crap. have to do a 1500 word history essay
  <heffalump75> hey u know the saying....
  <heffalump75> just draw 1.5 pictures


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911287
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.408631
text:
  <cyan> You know what would suck?
  <cyan> If an accident happened and you had to dial 911, but
  you have dyslexia.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911288
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.408684
text:
  <gaarie> who the fuck names a lake winnipesaukee
  <DX|laptop> indians
  <ch> yep
  <gaarie> truth
  <DX|laptop> and not the tech support kind
  <ch> the casino kind


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911288
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.408747
text:
  <@neotek> can you imagine how many neck injuries occur each
  year from camwhores with small tits trying to lick their
  nipples?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911288
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.408820
text:
  <predation> so I'm at work and this kid rings the bell on the
  counter RIGHT behind me
  <predation> the kid goes "SORRY" when I turn around
  <predation> kid's mom goes "sorry isn't an excuse when you do
  something stupid on purpose"
  <predation> i'm putting it on a t-shirt


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911289
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.408905
text:
  <ItBurn> when I'm drunk the other stuff dosent matter :P
  <ItBurn> I could be mining coal and it would be fun :P
  * Moraelyn ignores the dirty reference
  <ItBurn> mmm
  * NaHaliel is contemplating not ignoring it
  * Belzebub forces NaHaliel to ignore it
  <NaHaliel> so... mining coal, eh?..  I don't mind if you swing
  that way, I guess.
  <ItBurn> I was saying minig coal as in THE ROCK THING
  <NaHaliel> it's ok burn, we still accept you for who you are
  <NaHaliel> :D
  <ItBurn> in a mine, with shafts and helmets
  <Belzebub> Sure Burn...we all believe you.
  <NaHaliel> shafts, yeah.
  <ItBurn> ack
  <Belzebub> Isn&#1169;t that kinda advanced S&M?
  <ItBurn> lol :P
  <Moraelyn> Helmet Burn?
  * ItBurn shuts up
  <NaHaliel> you know, morey.  the helmets you put on your shaft
  when you mine for coal?
  <Moraelyn> Um, we need to move on...


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911289
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.408954
text:
  ianepson: heh one time i was camping up in the mountains and
  there were these wierd sounds
  ianepson: and i had my guitar with me......
  ianepson: somthing compelled me to play the theme to
  deliverance
  Metal Mantis X: lol
  Metal Mantis X: lmfao
  ianepson: i half expected some guy to come out of the trees
  and make me squeel like a piggai
  Metal Mantis X: lol
  ianepson: my dad comes out and is like wtf are you doin? ur
  gonna get us all raped.
  ianepson: sure enough these dudes come rollin by in a van
  honkin the horn.... wavin and hollerin.....
  ianepson: SQEEEEEEEEEEEELLLLL
  ianepson: lol then we ended up jammin and this dude was askin
  me to play Nirvana
  Metal Mantis X: heh good thing you didn't play "Rape Me"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911289
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.409020
text:
  <dma> I once wrote a program to determine how long it would
  take to listen to all my cheesy mids.
  <dma> forgot the result
  <Silencer> ha
  <Silencer> thats nothin
  <Silencer> one time my friends and i got bored
  <Silencer> so we figured out a couple interesting facts about
  mexico
  <Silencer> such as how many parking spaces it would hold if it
  was flattened and paved
  <Silencer> or if the entire population of mexico was to cut
  the grass of every lawn in the us
  <Silencer> how long it would take them (ie, how often they
  could do it, once a week, once every two weeks, i forgot how
  long)
  <Silencer> and we figured out how many cars it would take to
  drive the entire population of mexico to the us, if each car
  held 7 people
  <Silencer> or 14 if its a van
  <Silencer> (i know, this is horrible stuff)
  <Silencer> (it was extremely funny, we actually figured it out
  too)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911289
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.409073
text:
  < evoxy> can anyone recommend a good php tutorial?
  < Dynom> evoxy: goodphptutorials.com
  < evoxy> lol i thought it was a bogus url
  < Dynom> it works?
  < Dynom> :-| wtf


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911290
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.409126
text:
  <Poinky> so, there is to be war between us...
  <brett1479> war?
  <p3nt4g0n> huh?
  <Mororvia> good god ya'll
  <p3nt4g0n> wha?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911290
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.409171
text:
  * lios has two tests he is totaly unprepared for..
  <Placid-Nightmares> pregnancy and urine
  <Placid-Nightmares> :/


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911290
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.409242
text:
  <siruv> FUCK!
  <siruv> FUCK!
  <pussydog> wats wrong?
  <siruv> i just sent an email of porn pics to a friend
  <siruv> got the email addy from my address book
  <siruv> but "dad" is next to "dave"
  <siruv> i chose "dad"
  <siruv> didn't realise till after it was sent
  <siruv> FUCK!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911291
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.409336
text:
  <Tracer> i recently had a to punish an engineer at work
  because the video camera's in the main assembly hangar caught
  him wacking off in the cockpit of a F-16..


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911291
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.409386
text:
  !dmwaters*! This is a wallops message for the Freenode network
  If you do not wish to see theese messages, type /mode yournick
  -w now. Thank you for using Freenode!:)
  !lilo*! This is a WALLOPS message for freenode.  These
  messages contain non-critical comments and announcements and
  detailed server info.  If you'd like to turn them off, '/mode
  <yournick> -w' works on most clients.  Thank you for using
  freenode!
  !lilo*! For reference, this is a non-critical comment.  Erm,
  wait.  Yeah.  I think.
  !brd*! m00 cow m00.. This is a non-critical m00, please stay
  tuned for further m00s
  !lilo*! Hmph.
  !brd*! ;P


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911291
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.409431
text:
  <Andy787> i dunno why people with sisters cant say they're
  hot, i know if i had a sister and she was hot, hell ied be all
  over her, lol


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911292
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.409480
text:
  <Chimette> anybody knowledgable about chamber music who also
  wants some lesbo porn?
  <crux> that will go down in history as one of the most
  inappropriate lines ever


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911292
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.409539
text:
  <doug-> moral dilemma: i just found a pak of 18 chicken legs
  in the deep freezer, however the label says 'best if used by
  06-12-01'.... do i cook it up for the kidz and avoid having to
  spend money on take out?  i'm not all that hungry myself
  anyway =]
  <Prozzy> I say go for it. If they die, at least you know.
  <doug-> hmm, never actually thought about *death*, just
  figured on projectile diarrhea, etc... now insurance policies
  come into play... this could be a win-win-win-lose-win
  situation i have here


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911292
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.409584
text:
  nih: I've had it with young girls.. often emotionally
  underdeveloped, insecure and terrible in bed
  nih: feel free to prove me wrong ;)
  Ruth: lol
  Ruth: nah, i agree with you
  Ruth: young girls are terrible in bed
  nih: they get better once they hit puberty


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911293
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.409632
text:
  <Miharu> you know you're asleep when you put your  jeans on
  backwards.
  <Kriss> That, or Kriss Kross..


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911293
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.409723
text:
  * Kaos legally owns Unknown Artist - Track 3 and doesn't
  pirate at all!
  <Kitsa> oo, I love that song


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911293
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.409772
text:
  <Handy> There are 2 kinds of people in the world.
  <Handy> 1. Those who need closure.
  <Marko> And?
  <DavyP> AND?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911294
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.409824
text:
  <druid> orgies, are they like birthday parties?
  <Deimos> what? the older you get the less fun they become?
  <druid> Deimos: it's like some old couples try to spice up
  their dimming sex life with nudism
  <druid> but end in a situation "can you please remove your
  saggy breast from my coffee


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911295
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.409897
text:
  <strego> sweet the hot girl just came to visit
  <strego> and I was all like "hey, baby! I've got Pez" and she
  was all like "Aw Yeah"
  <kingBooze> so did you guys do it?
  <strego> well she "ate my Pez", if you know what I mean


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911295
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.409952
text:
  <grier> you think you're so god damn floorless
  <grier> so superior
  <XfitzyX> do you mean flawless?
  <girer> oh fucken leave me alone
  * grier has quit IRC (Exit: i am so alone in this empty world)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911296
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.410041
text:
  KiSsAbLeMaiDeN: question
  KiSsAbLeMaiDeN: is it good for a girl to be hairy er no?
  KiSsAbLeMaiDeN: ?
  Eric3934: no
  KiSsAbLeMaiDeN: aight thanks


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911296
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.410096
text:
  <djv> psykiv..sorry about your loss
  <djv> BUY A MACINTOSH NEXT TIME.
  <djv> ;)
  <The-Virus> why buy a mac
  <The-Virus> its like buying a car thats only compatible with
  10% of the roads


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911296
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.410143
text:
  <LordViper> Atarax: in all honestly, we don't care what you do
  in your spare time, however if it has entertainment value, we
  like to hear it


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911297
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.410242
text:
  * Therapist is now known as TheRapist
  <Zvorg> ...
  <JebusCrip> ...
  <Stateobv> dotdotdot
  <TheRapist> What? I like capitalizing random letters..


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911297
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.410343
text:
  <greycat> 95% of the time, ssh key authentication problems are
  caused by incorrect permissions on the server side.
  <greycat> the other 5%, it's misspelling of ~/.ssh/
  authorized_keys
  <p0ts> yes
  <p0ts> it worked
  <p0ts> my private key wasnt where it was supposed to be
  * greycat adjusts the odds.  94% of the time, server-side
  directory perms.  5%, misspelling.  1%, user moved the files
  around for no good reason.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911298
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.410430
text:
  <dranyam> It's nature. How do you make nature against the
  fucking law? It grows everywhere. Serves a thousand different
  functions, all of them positive. To make marijuana against the
  law is like saying to God made a mistake. You know what I
  mean, it's like God on the seventh day looked down on his
  creation:
  <dranyam> "There it is, my creation, perfect and holy in all
  ways. Now, I can rest."
  <dranyam> [Mimes God looking around - spotting pot]
  <dranyam> "Oh my me."
  <dranyam> "I left fucking pot everywhere."
  <dranyam> "I should never have smoked that joint on the third
  day ..shit."
  <dranyam> "That was the day I created possums. Haha. Still
  gives me a chuckle."
  <dranyam> "If I leave pot everywhere that's gonna to give
  humans the impression they're supposed to... 'use' it."
  <dranyam> "(sigh)Now I have to create Republicans."


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911298
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.410483
text:
  <octo> no matter what anyone tells you, or how much you think
  it would be a good idea, never ever put aftershave on your
  balls
  <HeXeDeCiMaL> OMG 0 ...
  <Angelhair> curiosity will get you every time
  <Ninja_Bill> as far as i know curiosity didnt make a cat put
  aftershave on its nuts


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911299
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.410626
text:
  * Nanuq copies the output to his hand
  <Nanuq> oooh, even better
  * Nanuq puts his hand in the printer and pipes to lpr
  <Nanuq> OWWW, OWWW, OWWW!
  <Nanuq> Okay, done.
  <Tron> Nanuq: Stupid! You should have used the inkjet!
  <Tron> *fwap*


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911299
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.410676
text:
  <prairiePirate> well there was a kid on the news that was born
  without eyelids
  <prairiePirate> they had to use the skin from his circumcision
  to make them
  <prairiePirate> they say he's ok, just a little cock-eyed


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911299
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.410722
text:
  <Neil> Whit, if you have nothing better to do, please dont
  spend time repeating what other people say in an irc channel,
  for your own fun, its quite annoying.
  <Whit> wheet, eff yew heave notink beta toodew, police
  doughnut spin tyme rear-painting wot order peepul sail un hey
  eye arr sea chang hell foo yew un fon, hits quit annayin


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911300
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.410783
text:
  <Feranis> Is it bad...
  <Feranis> When this:
  <Feranis> )=
  <Feranis> Vividly reminds me of the planetary ion cannon they
  had on Hoth?
  <Gararion> what?
  <Gararion> ah lol
  <Zork> That's bad. It's a frowny-face, not an ion cannon
  <Zork> dork


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911300
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.410876
text:
  <d0pp> I farted over the intercom last night.
  <d0pp> :D
  <d0pp> It echoed through the entire store.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911301
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.410928
text:
  <Tr1v14s3rv314m> 28. tegucigalpa is the capital of ______ ?
  <Rive> wtfux
  <Dr3w529> fuck that.
  <Rive> Later


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911301
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.410976
text:
  Nastard> i think i just found an avi of shania twain sucking
  some guy off
  <matt> that don't impress me much


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911301
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.411030
text:
  <@JP> before i saw miss cleo's commercial, i didn't know there
  was a "you are attracted to a large-breasted female co-worker"
  card in the tarot deck.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911301
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.411085
text:
  * Takeshi doesn't get the obsession with all the digits of pi
  <rabid_si> It's like Mersienne Primes.
  <rabid_si> Mathematicians get off on big numbers.
  <Takeshi> Oh, so it's mathsturbation?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911302
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.411139
text:
  <BMPthePNG> haha
  <BMPthePNG> I put on smashing live and my cat laid down and
  purred
  <BMPthePNG> so I thought 'hmmm' and put on System of a down
  <BMPthePNG> she went and attacked the dog


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911302
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.411190
text:
  <Rachtman> I can't wait to watch Dick Clark's ball drop.
  <Sharparoni> wow. never say that again, please.
  <Rachtman> haha


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911303
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.411388
text:
  <ChaosDragon> Can someone explain this to me?
  <ChaosDragon> "Christmas Star - Outdoor Icicle Lights
  <ChaosDragon> For indoor use only."
  <Custodian> lol
  <Custodian> that's almost as good as the shower cap box with
  "fits one head" on it
  <Custodian> (from a hotel in disney, france)
  <Roachie> LOL
  <Custodian> I can only assume the french have some odd shower
  habbits


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911303
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.411447
text:
  <dr_tril> i wanna be bruce lee
  <aNuBiS-> i wanna fuck his tight chinese ass
  <ChewToy> ok that's a visual i didn't need anubis
  <ChewToy> what is it with you and homosexuals this morning?
  <dr_tril> or what is it with him and homosexuals every morning


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911304
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.411494
text:
  <Randt> if you go to jail, your best friend is the laxative...
  then when you're shitting all over the joint, noone is going
  to ass rape you


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911304
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.411588
text:
  <brent> I think when you check all the empty beer cans you
  have a problem on your hands
  <sledge> and that would be no more beer


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911305
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.411641
text:
  <miki> hey pinkmonkey has spelling and grammar mistakes in
  it's summaries!
  <miki> I don't even have to re-write it into my own words!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911305
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.411691
text:
  <nframe> havent been to work in forever :p
  <nframe> hope I remember how it goes around here.
  <aaronitis> just like riding a bike, man
  <trilliongrams> ^ bring your kneepads.  It will hurt a lot
  less.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911305
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.411739
text:
  <Keitaro> I think I know where Michael Jackson got the idea to
  hang his kid over the balcony.
  <Keitaro> Lion King.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911305
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.411795
text:
  <Crimson_Dynamo> Stupid kazaa, it has a banner for penis
  enlargement pills "Doctor approved pill will enlarge your
  manhood in just 3 weeks!"
  <|[T]|HiddenPower> that can't be legal, what if kiddies are
  using the computer?
  <Crimson_Dynamo> then we will have 7-year-olds with huge
  penises


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911306
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.411851
text:
  <Moogle> Yeah, I took our first time when the condom broke to
  be a sign for me to keep it in my pants
  <Gau> Was she on the pill?
  <Moogle> nope
  <Gau> man.. I would have donkey-punched her out cold and
  douched for 3 straight hours!
  <Moogle> Douching actually makes it worse.
  <Gau> Not if you do it with 12 mole per litre HCl
  <Moogle> hoh!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911306
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.411902
text:
  A little overexcited about Silent Hill:

  <Aremis> Who can take a fire sireeennnnn.... and make a symbol
  of fear and dread? Who can take a sweet town and fill it with
  the undead? Konami cannnnn... The Konami Corp. cannnnnn.....
  <Aremis> The Konami Corp. can take a simple hospital and make
  it a hell of rust and bloooooddddddd......
  <Aremis> Who can take a happy dayyyyyy.... and shove it full
  of fog and snow? Who can make monsters that die with one blow?
  Konami cannnnnn.... the Konami corp. cannnnnn....
  <Aremis> The Konami Corp. can because people are addicted to
  fear and they have stockholders in North koreaaaaa.....


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911306
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.411951
text:
  <jimmiejaz> Doctors in Singapore say the virus that causes
  severe acute respiratory syndrome (SARS) is present in the
  tears of patients with the disease.
  <syberghost> Cry me a fever.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911306
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.411996
text:
  [The KaptKneeemo] I went to the recruters office stoned as
  fuck
  [The KaptKneeemo] he asked me how many times I had smoked weed
  [The KaptKneeemo] and I was like "TODAY??"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911307
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.412051
text:
  <blazemore> Now playing: 01 - David Rose - Gay Spirits @ 128
  Kbps. (0:05/2:07)
  <blazemore> ah hear we go
  <HKISA> YES!!!
  <HKISA> wait
  <HKISA> shit that 'yes' was out of place


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911307
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.412095
text:
  <DMC[18s]> heater cores look like baby radiators that fell out
  of the sky for my enjoyment.. i just wanna give them a hug
  they are so cuddly


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911307
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.412149
text:
  <ProAlias> re
  <ProAlias> phew
  <ProAlias> time flies when you're playing Desert Combat
  <ProAlias> no wonder the americans are stuck in Iraq
  <Jeedo> lol


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911308
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.412197
text:
  <DB> So, anyone have a secret to immortality they would like
  to share with me?
  <Nidoking> Don't die.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911308
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.412290
text:
  <+|TX|-Narflar> I thought he was Lawless's bitch =)
  <@KK> he gets around
  <@KK> LIKE VINYL ON A TURNTABLE


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911308
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.412337
text:
  <DevDuck> how can we you worry about a little speed difference
  when there's such huge problems in the world? like hunger and
  war and my mozilla crashing!?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911309
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.412383
text:
  <slackor> maybe, send me your pic first. last person i met off
  the net turned out to be 12 FBI agents


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911309
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.412429
text:
  <@Oz> just reading about the human genome project
  <@Oz> what a waste of time, if only god had just released the
  source with the binaries


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911309
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.412475
text:
  <DrShah> anyone know what them things are called that will let
  me fit a hd into a 5 1/2 inch bay?
  <_8ight> yeah. screws.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911310
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.412523
text:
  <[33rd-A]Ruger> i've actually considered assassination in
  order to get a girl
  <Logic_BomB> your into necrophilia too eh?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911310
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.412577
text:
  <Orajim> I was in the bathroom today and written above one of
  the urinals said "The joke isn't on the wall, it's in your
  hands"
  <Orajim> I never felt so small in my life.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911310
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.412629
text:
  <Lizrdling> bunch other thatway doing swing.
  <Lizrdling> bunch of me and others having a picnic.
  <nebouxii> swinging? like having sex with each other?
  <rob`> nebo; Stanford, not Berkeley.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911310
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.412672
text:
  shopgirl6665: installing flash...soon my website will be the
  coolest ever
  shopgirl6665: hmmm...there appears to be somewhat of a
  learning curve...


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911311
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.412734
text:
  <HeraldTheGreat> what's a +b?
  <@Kavity> It stands for +buddy, want one?
  <HeraldTheGreat> sure!
  <@Kavity> Ok! ;)
  --- Kavity has set a ban on: herald@*.bos.east.verizon.net
  <HeraldTheGreat> thanks, you guys are cool! i will be back
  later!
  * HeraldTheGreat has quit IRC (BYE NEW FRIENDS!)
  <@Kavity> Hehe... I don't think he will ;)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911311
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.412783
text:
  <DarkSun> I ask for a n64 emu and a big nerd syz me go to
  http://www.emu's.shoved.up.my.arse.com
  <DarkSun> Anyone have a good webpage with EMU????


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911311
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.412833
text:
  <RevSlidey> patience is the only acoustic song I like
  <Ronald> <RevSlidey> black is the only kind of dick i will
  suck


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911312
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.412877
text:
  <@blodyholy> do you know the importance of mixing caramel and
  honey and whipping creme together and heating it up in the
  microwave for 2 minutes and pouring it on your cat?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911312
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.412928
text:
  <frank> can you help me install GTA3?
  <knightmare> first, shut down all programs you aren't using
  frank has quit IRC. (Quit)
  <knightmare> ...


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911312
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.412976
text:
  <preda> hehe my penis slowly rolling off my desk and when it
  falls off its going to hit my cat
  <preda> err pen is


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911312
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.413073
text:
  <Aglandiir> All you have to do is have a huge amount of energy
  <Aglandiir> etc.
  <Aglandiir> you can make a l33t food replicator
  <+Bayonetto> I must admit
  <Aeriana> But I want n3rd to DCC me food everyday.
  <Aeriana> ;)
  <+Bayonetto> I'd rather be able to fire myself to the coast or
  something.
  <+Triskelios> but you're cooking it...
  <+Triskelios> =P
  <Aeriana> No, I'm too lazy.
  <+Arty2> you'll download it through kazaa
  <+Triskelios> haha
  <+Triskelios> pirated food
  <Aeriana> Then they'd be suing you for copyrights.
  <+Bayonetto> illegaly shared pizza.
  <Aglandiir> It would be dummy food
  <+Arty2> cracks for pasta
  <+Triskelios> free KFC for everyone
  <Aglandiir> it wouldn't be a burger
  <Aglandiir> it would be a photo of Madonna screaming at you
  <Aglandiir> YOU BTCH WHY ARE YOU STEALING MY FOOD


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911313
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.413174
text:
  <CPUkid> holy shit...8.25gb
  <MacGunner> what your game folder?
  <CPUkid> No all my porn, the special kind.
  <MacGunner> wtf, gay porn?
  <CPUkid> yeppers =/


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911313
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.413218
text:
  <[eep]matt> bearing in mind all rap songs are about sex,
  drugs, and how they were fucked up the arse as a child.. there
  aint much to choose from


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911314
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.413273
text:
  <Muppet> *arf arf*
  <damnyoure> *slap slap*
  <Muppet> *bite bite*
  <damnyoure> *bang bang*
  <Muppet> *die die*
  <damnyoure> *bury bury*
  <Muppet> *rot rot*


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911314
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.413317
text:
  Charmaine----: I'm a 26 year old single mom ;-)
  Kolobos Psychi: Holy crap! a black women IMed me! @_@
  Charmaine----: How did you know I was black?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911314
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.413423
text:
  <Altoid> "There are now fewer than 30,000 orangutans left and
  it is likely that they will become extinct in the wild in as
  little as 20 years' time if this decline continues,"
  <BridgetJ> awwww poor orangutans
  <Altoid> I knoooow
  <Altoid> :(
  <dregn> i think we should eat more of them
  <dregn> enjoy them while they are still around


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911315
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.413516
text:
  *** Adee is now known as Elvis
  <Elvis> Ah huh huh..
  <Electric> Here, have a cheeseburger :)
  <Electric> Now go take some drugs and sit on the toilet...
  *** Elvis has quit IRC (Quit: )
  <Electric> It worked!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911315
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.413569
text:
  <R3Co][L> i really need to reinstall PS
  <R3Co][L> fuck knows where ive put my cd
  * Ghozt is now known as fuck_knows
  <fuck_knows> it's under the clothes on your floor.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911315
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.413623
text:
  <1> please tell me if there's any way to check if a table
  exist in mysql database
  <2> if (mysql_query('DROP TABLE table_name')) echo "table
  existed";


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911316
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.413686
text:
  <Masao[RY]> DS: I really enjoy translating :-)
  <Ninja-San> translate this: <^>(-_-)<^>
  <DS> well
  <DS> let's tranlate it from japanese to english
  <DS>  <^>('_')<^>


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911316
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.413735
text:
  <metroid23> i ask for whole milk and people look at me like i
  wanna suck it right off the cow or something


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911316
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.413777
text:
  *** ag3nt0 (ag3nt@=H2T430-2929.NYCM.splitrock.net) has joined
  channel #consolevision
  ag3nt0- grrr
  ag3nt0- stupid connect
  ag3nt0 kicks his isp
  *** Signoff: ag3nt0 (Ping Timeout)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911317
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.413831
text:
  <rezza> wow this 2.6 linux kernel is a big improvement on the
  2.4 series... i can do all sorts of crap at the same time with
  no slowdown...
  <mojomonkee> while you're compiling programs and updating
  dependencies at blazing speeds
  <mojomonkee> i'm actually doing things


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911317
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.413873
text:
  TwilightKnight: omfg
  TwilightKnight: i just lost 2 and a half hours of my life
  TwilightKnight: to unreal tournament
  DrSpaZZo: Really? I just fucking lost 4 hours of my life to
  fixing my laptop
  DrSpaZZo: So shut the fuck up


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911317
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.413919
text:
  <LemmingAFK> I wasn't bothered by people calling me Lemming in
  real life, until girls started yelling it during sex.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911317
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.413969
text:
  <crunchyfish> It's easier to talk to girls if you find little
  ways to surprise them.
  <crunchyfish> Like punching them in their fucking whore face
  in a dark parking lot.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911318
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.414020
text:
  <The_Fellator> She passed out on the couch so I covered her
  up, turned off the tv and left
  <Temujin> Covered her up with manchowder.
  <The_Fellator> I washed that off
  <The_Fellator> well
  <The_Fellator> with urine


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911318
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.414118
text:
  tobby14 (~java@1046E976.C3C0D218.2D1B8E7.IP) has joined #Lobby
  <tobby14> whats up you all mudafuckers
  <@Dante> i think you're on the wrong server
  <@Dante> you want irc.whitetrash.wigger.net


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911319
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.414171
text:
  <Linforcer> heh, I just told m girfriend I like my women like
  I like I like my programming
  <MuStR>     logical?
  <Linforcer> C++
  <mkde>      LOL
  <MuStR>     rofl are you serious?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911319
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.414215
text:
  dftpnkezln: For all of you reporting a score more than 100 as
  you iq lol @ you. How can you possibly score more than 100%?
  dftpnkezln:I'm very happy with my score of 89.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911320
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.414276
text:
  <&TwoZero> so.. the internet at work died completely and after
  trying to fix it I said fuck it and went home
  <&TwoZero> and ran netstumbler on the bus.. and found 336
  accesspoints
  <&TwoZero> the bus stopped in front of a church, and the SSID
  'satans partyhouse' appeared
  <&TwoZero> must be some student living next to it or something


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911321
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.414372
text:
  <sE|PassePartouT`v> i can beat you like sgamer beats off
  <sE|PassePartouT`v> and that's a lot
  <sgamer> that is a lot, but i doubt you can


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911321
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.414425
text:
  <DarkPaladin> You know how people don't spea properly ost of
  the time?
  <DarkPaladin> *most
  <DarkPaladin> *speak
  <Tiddles> I do now.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911321
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.414528
text:
  <Rustblade> I gotta add some new cooling if I'm going to
  accomodate this new scsi 3 drive
  <Rustblade> oh shit
  <Rustblade> you know what I realized
  <Rustblade> I need a fucking scsi 3 controler
  <Rustblade> I didn't think of that


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911322
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.414576
text:
  <Toolbox> Mon (11:55 PM) : do you want to come over?
  <Toolbox> =-/
  <Toolbox> video games > sex with fat chick?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911322
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.414632
text:
  <Gabealicious> Will you please yank all these goddamned hairs
  from my nose???
  <JungleMason> You need to go to Sharper Image or something and
  get a fancy nose-hair cutting gizmo.
  <Gabealicious> I think so.
  <JungleMason> Make sure you read the warning label though:
  "Not safe for most rectums."
  <Gabealicious> It's a bit late for that.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911322
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.414697
text:
  (http://www.yodelbank.com is the worlds first cyberbank u can
  access using IRC bot commands)
  *** Now talking in #yodel
  <r0bb0r> right this is
  <r0bb0r> a stick up
  <yodel> hi r0bb0r
  <r0bb0r> gimme all ur money
  <r0bb0r> and no one gets hurt
  * r0bb0r waves gun at all
  <r0bb0r> come on then i am not joking
  <yodel> here take it!
  <yodel> DRAN_100.00_20031119_ShcjkX/
  CTzeExE0icgZColDatsQ_F+CldGJPOQO4VKMxSnPdH6SaER w
  <r0bb0r> thank u
  <r0bb0r> is this your first robbery?
  <yodel> yes
  <r0bb0r> excellent i can claim the first IRC robbery in
  history
  * r0bb0r runs off


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911323
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.414754
text:
  <QuantumKat> Whitehouse Communications Director Dan Bartlett
  has admitted that 'applause lines' were written into the
  President's State of the Union Address of 2004. He went on to
  say some of the applause was genuine.
  <QuantumKat> everybody clap now
  <mash|dead> ...
  <mikedude> <applause sign lights up>


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911323
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.414910
text:
  <@Malf> dude im pranking people on skype
  <@Malf> i called this american pizza place
  <@Malf> and i go "are you mexican"
  <@Malf> "no"
  <@Malf> "ok i'd like to order a pizza then"
  <@Malf> "sorry we dont sell to racists"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911324
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.414957
text:
  --> heha (cyber@????????.ipt.aol.com) has joined #linux
  --- YeahBabY sets ban on *!*@*.aol.???
  <-- Crikey has kicked heha from #linux (banned: Too many
  problems with AOL.  Use another ISP.  Permban)
  <thinko> nice ban, covers those pesky aol.mil ppl too


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911324
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.415008
text:
  Veav: I would do weird things with my kids.
  Veav: Their first language will be BASIC.
  Veav: They'll be running around yelling "10 print daddy, 20
  print daddy, 30 print can I have some candy, 40 input x?"
  Chef Brian: So Veav, I take it they won't be functional
  members of any society?
  Veav: And I'd be all "X = NO!"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911324
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.415054
text:
  Mandy: The baby's kickin'.
  Adam: well kick that little fucker back.
  Adam: gotta start early with discipline


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911325
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.415102
text:
  <Underscore> /part and /quit are sitting on a boat, they weigh
  a total of 120kg, the moon is at waxing crescent and it is 12
  degrees C outside. How much marzipan can a giraffe eat in 10
  minutes?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911325
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.415161
text:
  <Madman> Rodents Of Unusual Size....I don't think they exist
  <CrashCat> rodents?
  <CrashCat> size?
  <Sbot> size is irrelevent. It's a question of methodology.
  <Madman> haha
  <CrashCat> ...


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911325
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.415268
text:
  <Blake`> Buffalo wants to draw in the film industry.
  <Blake`> What the fuck are they gonna film there?
  <`Edwin`> Fargo, part 2?
  <Blake`> "The Adventures of Nanook the Eskimo"?
  <`Edwin`> Call of the Wild?
  <Blake`> "Dude, Where's My Economy?"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911326
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.415323
text:
  <Shanaynay> HEY FAGS
  <oval> Shanaynay, how in the HELL are you gonna say "hey fags"
  when your nick is Shanaynay? ;)
  <Shanaynay> OH NO YOU DIDN'T
  <Shanaynay> I KNOW YOU DIDN'T JUST DIS THE NAME MY MOMMA GAVE
  ME


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911326
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.415407
text:
  <@RxR|Skitzo> !access MyAssHard
  * @Anjali accesses skitzo's hard ass
  <@Anjali> its to hard
  <@RxR|Skitzo> hahaha
  <@Anjali> i cant access it
  <@Anjali> i cant get thru
  <@Anjali> damn
  * TheCardboardTubeSamurai takes pics of the action
  <@RxR|Skitzo> lol
  <@Anjali> lol
  <@RxR|Skitzo> try harder!!
  <@RxR|Skitzo> it shouldnt be that hard...but you should
  * @Anjali fists Skitzo
  <@Anjali> STILL NOT PENETRATING
  <@Anjali> SOMEONE HELP ME
  <@RxR|Skitzo> hahaha
  * @Anjali pushes harder
  <@Anjali> i feel something smushy pushing against my fist
  <@Anjali> ewwwww
  * TheCardboardTubeSamurai records action on camcorder
  <TheCardboardTubeSamurai> omg irc gone wild
  <TheCardboardTubeSamurai> whoo!
  <TheCardboardTubeSamurai> who wants beads
  <@RxR|Skitzo> lolololol
  <@RxR|Skitzo> haha


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911326
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.415458
text:
  <B_Spears> Jimmy Buffet? aww
  <Slander> Jimmy rocks man
  <Ferney> heh
  <B_Spears> yeah, in a rocking chair ;)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911327
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.415563
text:
  <energize> i just cant' think of anything to code
  <pantherqs> code some porn
  <energize> how the fuck do you code porn?
  <Linkadmin> haha I wish I knew
  <Linkadmin> but it would be cool... a random porn scene
  generator
  <pantherqs> that'd be sweet... have the program randomly
  insert a chick's body with randomly generating tit size, hair
  color, shaved or not shaved.. then have a whole slew of
  randomly chosen actions... suck, fuck, bukakke.... oh man. i
  wish i could code.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911327
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.415626
text:
  <mojo1701> I remember being in class, and the teacher started
  talking to us about communicable diseases
  <mojo1701> our teacher's a real whore
  <mojo1701> and she kept on saying to us: "Flies can carry
  diseases. You don't know where they've been"
  <mojo1701> and I looked at her and said, "Then you should stop
  unzipping so many of them if you don't know where they've
  been."


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911327
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.415672
text:
  <moira> yoinkster is like the humpback of notre dame
  cathedral, except no humpback, and it's the ogg vorbis
  cathedral, and he keeps ringing the bells yelling
  unintelligible things about how ogg owns your mom


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911328
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.415766
text:
  <Lac> Whats so unfathomable of: Double click zip file, hit
  extract, click the C: Drive, hit ok.
  <hmne> Slow down, double what?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911328
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.415808
text:
  Nash: waited on hold to tech support for 27 minutes... it
  literaly reconnected as someone finaly picked up
  Keith: gotta love that
  *** Nash has signed off IRC (Ping timeout).
  * Graham can hear the swearing from here!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911328
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.415875
text:
  <E|S-Darch> It's disturbing how many people in here know what
  the word bukkake means...
  <Hoffmann> whats a "bukkake"?
  <E|S-Darch> its when like 15 guys decide to blow a load on a
  girl's face
  <Hoffmann> hrmm let me guess, u exprimented with it on your
  little brother?
  <E|S-Darch> wtf
  <E|S-Darch> i fucking hate you
  <Hoffmann> no dude see thats funnie
  <Hoffmann> ur suppose to say lol..its not like its true
  <Hoffmann> ...or is it?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911329
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.415933
text:
  <Yuli> ...so anyway, I was all like "where's my coconuts man!
  I ordered em last week!"
  <Yuli> and the guy just stared at me like "what the fuck?"
  <Yuli> so i was all like "whatever man, send them to my hut"
  <Yuli> and I paddled away


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911329
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.415982
text:
  <sdodson> I'm trying to figure out if my neighbors have really
  bad rhythm or if they're hanging photos on the wall


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911329
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.416031
text:
  <[NSGuide]Greedo386> I'm American.  I respect the Bill of
  Rights.  Freedom of Speech is one of the greatest parts of
  being American.  That being said, you have no rights in here,
  whatsoever.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911330
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.416087
text:
  <Mojo> FF games never appealed to me
  <Mojo> i feel unique and smart
  <Mojo> and less nerdy
  <Mojo> wait i never was nerdy
  <Mojo> YEA
  <Threeboy> hey, NEWS FLASH YOU'RE ON GODDAMN IRC!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911330
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.416231
text:
  <Byte> i cant find a good isp :(
  <Byte> vcisp.net looked good
  <Byte> but 30 hours/week...
  <Byte> i use at least 56 hours
  <Byte> per day


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911331
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.416280
text:
  tophyr: dude it smells like updawg in here
  CowboyVik124: hey instant winner playing this fri at somewhere
  wanna go
  tophyr: IT SMELLS LIKE UPDAWG IN HERE
  CowboyVik124: updawg?
  tophyr: DAMMIT.
  CowboyVik124: in watching van wiler
  tophyr: ASK WHAT IT IS
  CowboyVik124: wilder
  CowboyVik124: i did
  tophyr: NO ASK WHAT IS
  CowboyVik124: what is it
  tophyr: OMFG.
  tophyr: WHAT IS UPDAWG
  tophyr: GOD
  CowboyVik124: what is updawg
  tophyr: YES.
  CowboyVik124: what is it
  tophyr: omfg
  tophyr: say it out loud
  CowboyVik124: updawg?
  tophyr: SAY "WHAT IS UPDAWG" OUT LOUD
  CowboyVik124: i am
  tophyr: AND YOU STILL DON'T GET IT.
  tophyr: TEXANS!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911331
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.416329
text:
  taebaeg: god i swear you guys make 4chan look like fine
  literature sometimes
  lemonlimeskull: ...
  lemonlimeskull: "Ask not for whom the Rick roll'd. It roll'd
  for thee."


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911331
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.416383
text:
  <Tkil> chaos_ -- oh... and if you're a beginner... don't worry
  overmuch about efficiency.
  <billn> if I wanted efficency, I'd put bigger tires on my
  truck, so I could get the whole cat in one pass.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911332
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.416475
text:
  e l i t e m r p: no work on monday, woo waaaaa
  r ever end in e: WHY not
  e l i t e m r p: holiday
  e l i t e m r p: the day we remember all the people who died
  to give me a day off from work


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911332
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.416523
text:
  <+t4D> man. i think its time to bring the coffee maker into
  the bedroom
  <+ScratXP> You may be moving too  fast
  <+ScratXP> take it to a movie first


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911332
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.416575
text:
  <Procyon> I don't know the world around me!
  <Procyon> I'm scared, and confused!
  <DS> have you felt a strong desire to vote for george w. bush
  recently?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911333
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.416619
text:
  <Kyote> What the fuck would a British version of Fight Club
  be? Two really pale guys calling each other wankers and
  throwing teabags around?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911333
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.416669
text:
  <@kram> !banme wibble
  * @Arrow throws a brick at wibble
  <@kram> cool
  <@Smidge204> !banme everyone else
  * @Arrow throws a brick at everyone else
  <Stryke> !banme
  * Arrow sets mode: +b *!
  *bopper@dialup-63.214.93.70.Dial1.Boston1.Level3.net
  * Stryke was kicked by Arrow (You fell for it; hook, line, and
  sinker.)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911333
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.416721
text:
  NgOs_WiLL: how many feminists does it take to change a
  lightbulb?
  NgOs_WiLL: One to change it and fifteen to form a support
  group!
  E30SupeR: it's a trick question - feminists can't change
  anything.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911333
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.416764
text:
  * [light] is away, someone told me that theres life outside of
  irc, i have to check it out [log:OFF] [page:OFF]
  [email:dj_light@blankandjones.zzn.com]


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911334
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.416868
text:
  <@Winternight> helloween sucks
  <@Winternight> well, now they suck, they used to rule
  <@Argoth> never really listened to em
  <@DIABOLICAL> I wish I could've listened to them back when I
  was in grade school
  <@Argoth> why?
  <@DIABOLICAL> well, I thought Janet Jackson was "black metal"
  back then


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911335
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.416971
text:
  <Kathleen> wtflolz
  <Alex> lololorz
  <Kevin> lol]
  <Alex> haga
  <Alex> 0wneef
  <Kathleen> omg y3s.
  <[X]> Is this some sort of idiot mating ritual? Should I get
  the Discovery Channel in here with cameras?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911335
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.417022
text:
  <aen> I am so hungry.
  <aen> Germs are shitting in my mouth.
  <aen> And I can taste it.
  <evilbob> oh. I misread that as Germans


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911336
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.417134
text:
  <Morj|YeozWins> I was once driving along the freeway,and a
  friend through some garbage out the window, and this lady ran
  over it
  <Morj|YeozWins> So she started chasing us
  <Morj|YeozWins> So I started going like 150-180 km/h down the
  freeway to get away, and she followed me
  <Morj|YeozWins> So I eventualyl pulled over, and she gets out
  of her car and runs up and goes "WHAT THE HELL, WHY WERE YOU
  DRIVING SO FAST YOU LITTLE ASSHOLE, I HAVE A BABY IN THE CAR
  YOU KNOW"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911336
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.417205
text:
  <INTERNET> god
  <INTERNET> I reemmber this one time
  <INTERNET> in an airplane
  <INTERNET> I was with my mom
  <INTERNET> and I was like... 11
  <INTERNET> well I saw these things called Sanitary Napkins
  <INTERNET> I thought they wre wetnaps
  <INTERNET> like those things from restaurants
  <INTERNET> so I got like a handful of them
  <INTERNET> and ran out of the bathroom and I screamed,
  "MOM!!!! I GOT THOSE SANITARY NAPKINS YOU LIKE SO MUCH!!!!!!"
  <INTERNET> EVERYONE ON THE PLANE WENT APESHIT AND MY MOM WAS
  JUST LAUGHING!!!!
  <INTERNET> she was like, "WILLIAM THOSE ARE TAMPONS NOT
  WETNAPS!!!"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911336
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.417257
text:
  <Rin> 65 peolpe killed in Canada by guns last year
  <Rin> 63 in UK
  <Rin> 64 in Australia
  <Rin> 11,456 in USA
  <Ram> we win!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911336
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.417319
text:
  <hohum> when you get to the printf(); *BAM* instant coredump
  followed by an suid shell
  <hohum> get it?
  <brandon> to a degree
  * brandon isn't much on programming
  <hohum> don't worry, neither are the people who write software
  :)
  <brandon> lol
  <hohum> you'd fit right in


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911337
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.417366
text:
  <RageFury|Work> Like just 2 days ago I casually dropped some
  Jalapeno into the can of Alpo Cat food I set out for the
  kitten.
  <RageFury|Work> Freaking bastard tried to claw my pants.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911337
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.417458
text:
  <alexs> documentation is like sex, when its good, its very
  good, when its bad, its better than nothing


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911337
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.417503
text:
  <Teratogen> The French Government announced today that it is
  enforcing a ban on the use of fireworks at Disneyland Paris.
  The decision comes the day after a nightly fireworks display
  at the park, located just 30 miles outside of Paris, caused
  soldiers at a nearby French army garrison to surrender to a
  group of Czech tourists .


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911338
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.417551
text:
  <Shaft> this is nice, customer calls in and opens a
  troubleticket, hes been suspended for non pay and his CC
  declined. Only way to turn abck on is by certified funds
  <Shaft> heres the kicker
  <Shaft> They are a collection agency


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911338
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.417605
text:
  <kisama> i'll have dsl too, by this week, brett
  <kisama> cockface is hooking me up
  <kisama> :)
  <Guilty|> Thats really nice of your mom to do


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911338
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.417656
text:
  <D-viant> it's not like her ass is caked in shit
  <D-viant> and it's not like I'm sticking my tongue IN her ass


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911339
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.417795
text:
  (+Jimbo1`friends) where did my savior go
  (@Monoxide) did you try the hill top?
  (@Monoxide) i heard he was hanging around there


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911339
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.417845
text:
  <khamosis> oh man... i had typed "hey! anyone awake?" in
  another channel about 20 minutes ago
  <khamosis> and just now i saw it and typed "yes!" not
  realizing it was me


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911340
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.417890
text:
  Maxim: My alarm clock software demo expired.
  Maxim: So I changed the system time by a week, and it worked.
  Maxim: But I forgot to change the alarm setting accordingly.
  Maxim: So the alarm didn't go off, and I missed the
  appointment.
  Maxim: :-(


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911340
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.417940
text:
  < pooter> I just came up with an amazingly good simile for
  math
  <+echobinary> does it add up?
  < pooter> :|


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911340
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.417990
text:
  <XZergonaleashIX> yeah, drowning your fish eh?
  <XZergonaleashIX> in prison talk thats
  <XZergonaleashIX> ugh...
  <XZergonaleashIX> nevermind, thats nasty


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911341
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.418130
text:
  <JynxDaddy> YAY ive finished my Mc Hammer HL model!!
  <Threeboy> im gonna pretend you didn't say that.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911341
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.418179
text:
  <chao> he and his wife were going to open a ranch for disabled
  children
  <donna> can they graze there?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911342
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.418229
text:
  <Kattar> jesus christ my dish washer sounds like it's going to
  explode
  <Kattar> I have never heard a dish washer make sounds like
  this before
  <Arkantos> Better take her to a hospital


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911342
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.418286
text:
  <tak08810> Frostlion, that is the porrest splelling Iv'e ever
  seen
  <Frostlion> no it'sn't
  <tak08810> err, poorest, I've, spelling


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911342
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.418365
text:
  <Keoni> Thank you for using Wordzone's Express Translation
  service. The text you have just submitted can be translated
  for the following price. Accepting this price by clicking on
  the "ORDER" button will allow us to begin translating your
  document immediately.
  <Keoni> Translation Price: $ 10.00
  <Keoni> WHO THE FUCK WILL PAY 10 BUCKS FOR 1 WORD???
  <Ragnarok> someone who really needs the word
  <Keoni> what word is that?
  <Ragnarok> hmm
  <Ragnarok> well
  <Ragnarok> i was on the phone with the database tech support a
  couple days ago
  <Ragnarok> well
  <Ragnarok> nights actually
  <Ragnarok> and since it was the middle of the night
  <Ragnarok> we get some guy in france
  <Ragnarok> and his english was incredibly shitty
  <Ragnarok> i'da paid $10 to know how to say assmarauder in
  french


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911343
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.418463
text:
  <r4ge> i just connect to eu.undernet.org or us.undernet.org
  <r4ge> lucky dip ;D
  <_Godless_> I thought I was taking a lucky dip once
  <_Godless_> then I got herpes


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911343
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.418517
text:
  <Khabi> Night. Don't let the bed bug bite.
  <Groverton> Bed bug?
  <Khabi> Yeah, there's just one, but he's FUCKING HUGE!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911343
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.418572
text:
  *** DickHead5 was kicked by TJ32 (3.80265176 × 10^-09 millenia
  long ban. (394 Served.))
  TJ32 sets mode: +b *!*java@*.cos2.cable.ntl.com
  <@DrLavaGoddess> LMAO
  <@DrLavaGoddess> Now that's funny
  <WhoaOutOfControl> Haha
  <WhoaOutOfControl> how long is that ban
  <@TJ32> 2 minutes.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911344
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.418626
text:
  <Affinity> yo
  <Affinity> asl?
  <ReGnIF> hey sup?
  <ReGnIF> 16 m jhb u?
  <Affinity> man i was gonna ask, can i ReGniF you backwards....
  <ReGnIF> thast my surname


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911347
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.418771
text:
  <MrSede> If it could balance a beer on its head without
  spilling I'd give it props, but any rodent can balance a
  pancake on its noggin


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911347
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.418834
text:
  <drGonzo> |     /%      &.&.&|
  <drGonzo> | % --    )  .&&&&T|
  <drGonzo> |   --       &&&@D.--
  <drGonzo> |       ------- -&&&--
  * drGonzo problem


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911347
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.418929
text:
  <hailz_b> pepsi is gayyyyyyy
  <hailz_b> gayyyyyyyy
  <hailz_b> give me cock anyday
  <hailz_b> i mean coke!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911348
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.419071
text:
  <Cyberllam> today has been about nothing but good news
  <Cyberllam> earlier i found out that I was pregnant with twins
  <juntog> are they mine?
  <HaLLowCat> they better not be
  <Cyberllam> no, but they can be, for the low, low price of 3
  low payments of 29.95 each


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911348
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.419120
text:
  <[omni]> wtf... it took you like 15 seconds to show us a
  picture of your hymen, but I have to wait hours to see a
  pictures of the pussy I'm actually interested in?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911349
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.419168
text:
  <Macca_> hi all
  <Macca_>  can anyone help me with uninstalling WindowsME, it
  hasn't been as
  easy as i thought it might be


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911349
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.419220
text:
  <orion> man
  <orion> fuck pints
  <orion> our corner store is selling QUARTS now
  <Hat> Where do you live, Ireland?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911349
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.419274
text:
  <DrEechmen>  So... earlier today, I was watching one of my
  family's cats hitting a cord hanging from our blinds for about
  10 minutes or so, and I started thinking 'gee, the danged
  animal is so darned easily amused'... and then I realized that
  I'd been staring at a cat playing with a string for ten
  minutes.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911350
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.419366
text:
  quit: (ChanServ) (ChanServ@Services.GameSurge.net) (brb)
  (@eFire) brb?
  (@eFire) the bot just left and said brb?
  (@eFire) wtf
  (@eFire) where the f#@ he think hes going?
  (@eFire) to the bathroom!!???


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911350
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.419421
text:
  <faded> i found a pocket pussy in my cousins room last night
  <SpaceGoat> even fat chicks
  <SpaceGoat> hahaha
  <dfury> hahaha
  <faded> so i put it in the dish washer
  <faded> to clean it so i could use it
  <faded> and it fucking melted


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911350
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.419471
text:
  <DentArthur> i took it a step further with the super glue in
  mouth incident :)
  <milenko17> DentArthur: it could be worse you could superglue
  your foreskin together
  <DentArthur> milenko17: it'd keep my KB cleaner :)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911351
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.419544
text:
  <KiloStar> I could probably get away with making $usedesign =
  $sidebar for the moment
  <KiloStar> heh
  <ShyAway> $usedesign=false :O
  <KiloStar> that would screw it up a bit
  <KiloStar> unless I made it if (!$usedesign) $usedesign =
  "default"
  <KiloStar> and then youd be pwned
  <ShyAway> $usedesign="incorrectvalue"
  <KiloStar> if (!file_exists("$pathtokajar$usedesign"))
  $usedesign = "default"
  <KiloStar> mwahaha
  <ShyAway> $usedesign=default
  <DartHomework> wow, it's like the Dueling Banjos of nerds


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911351
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.419590
text:
  <aen> I look somewhat akin to a pensive crackwhore waiting for
  cock suckage, vexed that it hasn't come to pass.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911351
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.419642
text:
  <nien_rima> actually, jaffars right there
  <Jaffar> Oh for the love of Christ, shut the Hell --
  <Jaffar> Oh wait.
  <Jaffar> You were agreeing with me.
  <Jaffar> Nevermind then, carry on.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911351
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.419702
text:
  <Prophecy> didnt know i was offering u a job
  <Buchwald> can you?  please?  mine sucks.
  <Prophecy> u can clean my toilets if u want
  <Prophecy> or polish my shoes
  <Prophecy> do u know how to spit shine
  <Prophecy> ?
  <Buchwald> spit shine?  well when i was younger, i made some
  movies that i'm not proud of...
  <Buchwald> oh.. wait... you meant shoes


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911352
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.419751
text:
  <Twingy> almost as annoying as you dal, except your hear
  longer
  <DAL9000> that would be almost insulting if it were
  grammatically correct


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911352
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.419802
text:
  <@Black_Dog> ryo: if you were a sheep, would you fuck a sheep?
  <@Ryo_Hayasa> BD: damn straight i would
  <@Ryo_Hayasa> BD: or the farmer's daughter


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911353
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.419906
text:
  <Erin> does anyone else think that maybe dairy farmers have
  been tricking us, and that cows are really bulls, and we all
  buy bull semen by the litre?
  <Erin> it's just whenever I see milk I think of semen that's
  all
  <KateK> Um, maybe you shouldn't let your dad prepare your
  cereal anymore.
  <Homestarrr> hellooo calcium deficiency


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911353
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.419956
text:
  <Anton> for a guess you had a shit day at work as usual?
  <Alexander> just boring
  <Anton> ever actually had a good day at work?
  <Alexander> well ok boring and shit


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911353
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.420008
text:
  <Chucklez> we use to stick icecream down our pants =P course
  it was melted by the time you got outside and far enough away
  so they didnt see you eating it :/
  <moo_nv> ewww
  <Asmodeus-AFK> I didn't want to know that
  <moo_nv> yeah :(


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911353
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.420060
text:
  <rawb-> Hey nyisles
  <rawb-> Wat doez your nick mean?
  <nyisles> it means Niles
  <rawb-> nile, like that ocean?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911354
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.420120
text:
  <George>  : Walmart is selling Linux boxes now.
  <George>  : Onward and upward.
  <George>  : Once you get them in the Walmart's, Cosco's, and
  K-Mart's, world domination is near.
  <3hreeD>  : yeah george but there's only so much you can do
  with those linux boxes
  <George>  : Yeah, like run the net.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911354
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.420168
text:
  <Tony> I challenge you to a duel.
  <Tony> Penises, at dawn.
  <Beerman> but battling against an unarmed opponent is so
  unfair


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911354
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.420238
text:
  <trivy>  019.168. Acronym Soup: DAP ?
  <trivy>  1st Hint: ******* ******* ********    BONUS Question
  Value : 55000 Points
  <trivy>  2nd Hint: par**** ******* ********   46.7 secs &
  55000 Points Remaining
  <tobrie> ...
  <tobrie> thats not right
  <abigale> hmm
  <trivy>  3rd Hint: pare*** a*ai*** ****e*ia   23.3 secs &
  55000 Points Remaining
  <Halffast> maybe it's foreign
  <trivy>  Times up!  The answer was ->
  parents against dyslexia  <-


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911355
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.420388
text:
  <Kelly> i know a guy who was so facinated w/ tits he take two
  condoms, fills them w/ water, ties them together, slings them
  over his shoulders and wears them in a bra
  <crazym> Kelly: you need to get out less.
  <Kelly> heh!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911355
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.420456
text:
  <chuck> I just got two CDs from AOL. Two CDs in one package.
  One is gold, for dial-up. The other is Silver, for Cable/DSL
  broadband. They came in a box that was half gold and half
  silver. The back of the box enumerates the difference between
  the two available plans.
  <chuck> The CDs have different features listed on their
  labels.
  <chuck> I diff'd them. They're identical.
  <chuck> bit for bit:
  <chuck> chkno$ md5sum /dev/cdrom
  <chuck> 43cf5b370b5d85a74afc2449f445579d /dev/cdrom
  <chuck> chkno$ md5sum /dev/cdrom
  <chuck> 43cf5b370b5d85a74afc2449f445579d /dev/cdrom


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911356
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.420528
text:
  <009> no... i mean, what is the ascii value of the number 10??
  <009> like for space its 32
  <009> for l its 76
  <poo_al> yes i know what you mean
  <009> therefore, what's for the number 10???
  <poo_al> 10 is a line feed
  <009> I DON'T MEAN WHAT WILL GIVE ME FOR THE VALUE OF 10...
  <poo_al> then what do you mean?
  <009> I WANT THE ASCII VALUE WHICH WILL GIVE ME A NUMBER 10


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911356
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.420624
text:
  * Qwyxzl growls at his connection
  * Furion sees his virus is working.
  * Qwyxzl gets out his Furion voodoo doll
  * Furion Quit (Ping timeout)
  <Elessa> whoa!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911356
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.420684
text:
  <LordSuggs> and i got a new 19" monitor at work
  <DeLorean> I can just imagine THAT interview; "...and how big
  was the monitor at your last job?"
  <LordSuggs> heh
  <LordSuggs> well my monitor isnt the only thing about me thats
  massive ;)
  <DeLorean> heh
  <DeLorean> ego


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911357
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.420731
text:
  «+Stevey^666» klas, send me some girls
  «+Klasnikov» ok
  «+Stevey^666» hot ones plz :D
  «+Klasnikov» ill send u jasmine, shes a model
  «+Stevey^666» w00t
  «+Stevey^666» shaven?
  «+Klasnikov» no shes an actual model, mostly plastic


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911357
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.420792
text:
  <Gohanmastaflex> www.imac.com - "LOOLLOLOL I GOT A PC BTU I
  CNT FIGUR IT OWT IT WEN ALL LIKE "BEEEEEEP' AND NO WI GOT A
  MAC AND ITS LIKE 'BEEP' BUT IN TEH GOOD WAY SO YAH ITS PRETY."
  <Gohanmastaflex> Macintosh computer are easy to use. It's also
  easy to stick your hand in a wood chipper.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911358
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.420895
text:
  <soink> and im not that fat
  <soink> cameras add like 48 pounds
  <SteelStud> Well, you must have used 5 cameras on that
  picture.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911358
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.420946
text:
  <Allister> Rookie, look in your Maximum PC where it compared
  all those gaming machines.
  <R00kie_> hold on , gota wipe the sticky stuff off


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911358
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.421008
text:
  <beser> Today my History class took a feild trip to the Museum
  of Tolerance. Its a museum showing kids not to be prejudice
  and all that good stuff.
  <beser> Anyways, one exhibit is two doors next to each other.
  One door has a sign hanging over it saying "Those with
  prejudice walk through this door" The other door's sign said
  "Those without prejudice walk through this door". Obviously
  the door for people without prejudice isn't openable because
  as the tour guide says "Everyone has prejudice".
  <beser> So, I start tugging on the door and say "What the hell
  is wrong with this damn door, did some damn Jew make this?"
  and the tour guide kicked me out and i had to sit in the bus
  for 15 minutes


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911358
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.421057
text:
  <JDigital> Religion in Northern Ireland actually has only very
  little to do with religion
  <bee> is it more like stamp collecting
  <Divine> Yes, except there are only two different stamps. And
  they want to kill each other.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911359
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.421100
text:
  rhys_rhaven: I have pictures..thousands of them. but most are
  art...i got katies harddrive.
  rhys_rhaven: ....
  overlord_overkill2007: ah i se
  rhys_rhaven: i dont understand how she can walk into a church
  rhys_rhaven: tons, and tons, of slash
  rhys_rhaven: gay guys, gay guys fucking, gay porn stories,
  guys on guys, guys kissing.
  overlord_overkill2007: ewww
  rhys_rhaven: guys humping guys, female ass domination, guy
  slaves, butt sex,
  overlord_overkill2007: ewwwwwwww
  rhys_rhaven: oh it gets worse. she has no file structure!!!!!
  rhys_rhaven: what kind of sick woman doesnt organize her
  files?!!!
  Daniel: EWWWWWWWW


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911359
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.421204
text:
  <ShroomDuck> but the head we get here in ontario is fuckin
  horrible <ShroomDuck> HEAT! <ShroomDuck> I MEANT HEAT!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911359
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.421252
text:
  <AndrewB> I personally think the game is unrealistic. If the
  character finds a Zod rune, why can't he just stick it up his
  own tailpipe and make himself indestructible?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911360
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.421310
text:
  <Tuxedocat> The other day i noticed some similarities between
  Willy Wonka's chocolate factory and a meth lab
  <Tuxedocat> if you stay there a while you see some strange
  shit
  <Tuxedocat> there's stuff that can kill you if you mess with
  it
  <Tuxedocat> it's run by a strange guy who doesn't like
  visitors


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911360
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.421372
text:
  <Claes> hey
  <Claes> I was just thinking...
  <Claes> If someone sent you 10 cd's and a note saying: 9 of
  these cd's contain porn. The last one fries your computer.
  <Claes> what would you do?
  * Claes Quit (Ping timeout)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911360
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.421424
text:
  pi4arctan1guy: I cam home from grocery shopping and there
  wasn't enough room for all my food and I thought "This isn't
  fair! Most people never have to deal with the frustration of
  not being able to fit all their food in their refrigerators!"
  Then, I put my hands on my big white belly and laughed a very
  deep laugh, while my top hat bobbed up and down and my cane
  leaned against my stack of property deeds and hundred dollar
  bills.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911361
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.421473
text:
  <phil> ok ok ops quiz
  <phil> what's the command to leave an irc channel?
  * Garron has quit IRC (Quit: )


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911361
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.421572
text:
  <[YG]Vagabond> shilf i want you to touch my trouser trout
  <Saddles|ihid> only if you touch my ankle spanker first


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911361
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.421618
text:
  cynicalkane: why does Michael Jackson like twenty eight year
  olds?
  cynicalkane: because there's twenty of them


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911362
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.421727
text:
  <Beren87> A swift kick in the pants
  <Beren87> that's always my suggestion
  <Beren87> for anything really
  <Beren87> Need to move a mule? A swift kick in the pants. Need
  orange juice? A swift kick in the pants
  <Beren87> It's very multi-purpose
  <TheXPhial> I need a gift for a friend


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911362
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.421797
text:
  <Firestorm-> my parents
  <Firestorm-> lol
  <Firestorm-> they walked in on my once
  <Firestorm-> that.. sucked.
  <Firestorm-> seriously
  <Firestorm-> nope
  <Firestorm-> they walked in, screamed, left.
  <Firestorm-> and I continued
  <Hinkey> you continued after they left?
  <Hinkey> you sick fuck
  <Firestorm-> yes Hinkey I finished up.
  <Firestorm-> and then I screamed at them


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911363
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.421845
text:
  <steveac> tough to do when you type with 1 finger on the
  keyboard and yoyur dick in your other hand


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911363
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.421951
text:
  <ccc> The next time you're having a bad day, imagine  this:
  You're a Siamese twin.  Your brother, attached at your
  shoulder is gay and you're not. But you only have one ass.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911363
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.422013
text:
  <bits> about 7-8mil live in sydney
  <bits> well not "sydney city" but live in sydney and its
  surrounding suburbs
  <Joshua> nice
  <Joshua> oh wait, you guys are on the metric system
  <bits> yep
  <Joshua> that's only like 3.5 million people in our system
  <bits> lol


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911364
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.422055
text:
  Munktun: how was thanksgiving?
  Wahbuffet: missionary position
  Munktun: hahahahaha
  Wahbuffet: sorry wrong person
  Wahbuffet: pretend i didnt say that


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911364
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.422114
text:
  <LORD|Kittel|Work> I had a user tell me that she couldn't see
  anything on her PC. I had her verify for me that it was
  plugged in and that it was turned on. When it still didn't
  display anything I went to her office to take a look.
  <LORD|Kittel|Work> She didn't have a computer. She had a
  monitor only.
  <LORD|Bishop|Werk> hahahahahahaaha
  <LORD|Kittel|Work> But that was indeed plugged in and turned
  on.
  <LORD|Kittel|Work> I had to give her that.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911364
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.422166
text:
  <Vagabond_> you get hit with a dick when you goto mcdonalds?
  <DrklrdBob> Usually.
  <Robyn``> DrklrdBob: Yes, and you will even get a free toy.
  <Vagabond_> is it a beefy dick?
  <DrklrdBob> Is the toy safe for children 3 and under?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911364
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.422224
text:
  <|TripleH|> so.. where are all the bitches who wanna make me
  somethin to eat.=P
  <epoch--> |TripleH|: they are having a meeting with all the
  bitches that want to sleep with you
  <Elmyra> so far, the room is empty..
  <lenoreo> all those folded chairs for nothing...
  <Elmyra> but we're still hopeful that SOMEONE will show up. ..
  <epoch--> or SOMETHING


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911365
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.422329
text:
  <SirGoblin> Anti = fat.
  <Anti> doh
  ****** Anti thwacks SirGoblin
  <Jante> SirGoblin = gay.
  <SirGoblin> better than fat ;/
  <Jante> no..
  <Jante> fat people can loose weight
  <Jante> gay people will have to live with the fact that
  they've had a dick up da bum


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911365
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.422382
text:
  <virika> i need a back massage
  * virika wonders if her vibrator is strong enough to give a
  decent back rub in place of a REAL back massager
  <Chaensaw> haha
  <Chaensaw> dora's the only woman on earth to use a DILDO as a
  BACK MASSAGER
  <virika> i broke my back massager ):


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911366
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.422431
text:
  <@Hellfire|RS> ... BET has nightly news now?
  <@Rei> "And to close, remember, MLK Jr Day is only 234 days
  away and keep it real, yo. Tonights credits will be done by
  Jameriquai and remember to tune in tomorrow morning at 6:00
  for your AM dose of ethnic stereotypes."


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911366
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.422484
text:
  <regulatin> I would'nt touch a girl who would do an uncut guy
  <regulatin> thats disgusting
  <regulatin> did u see the pic of the dildo in my ass


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911366
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.422539
text:
  <@zexion> the ice age VCD sucks ass
  <@zexion> the guy was jerking off while filimg the movie or
  something...
  <@zexion> and some asshole kept gettng up for popcorn or
  something... I couldnt watch it after 10 minutes
  <@zexion> gotta wait for the SVCD
  <@^101> it brings the theater experince home zex
  <@zexion> 101: always looking at the bright side of life eh?
  :)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911366
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.422592
text:
  <RatBreath> almost half a terabyte of copyrighted material...
  amazing. you are a god
  <Rzrshrp60> well most of it is vids of isajeeps mom on the
  strip
  <Efflixi> lol
  <Rzrshrp60> ...high quality
  <isajeep> wtf


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911367
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.422692
text:
  <Theanine> Getting high also impairs judgment, which can lead
  to risky decision making on issues like sex, criminal
  activity, or riding with someone who is under the influence of
  drugs or alcohol.
  <Theanine> haha :D
  <Theanine> i get high all the time but im not getting laid...:
  (
  <Theanine> this weed isnt working correctly


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911367
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.422742
text:
  <Linguica> heh
  <Quasar`> bone thugs called the street they lived on the
  Double Glock because its East 99th
  <Linguica> has anyone noticed that quasar almost never talks
  about bone thugsFUCK


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911368
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.422793
text:
  <+Synista> so
  <+Synista> I downloaded this fly fishing movie
  <+Synista> since I need to learn how to cast properly
  <+Synista> turns out it was a pr0n movie called fly fishing


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911368
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.422849
text:
  <lid> so what did i miss
  <dustyX> oh, the secret of life, nothing big.
  <lid> did ya decide what it is
  <lid> im kinda curious
  <dustyX> doncha know, the secret of life is 42?
  <lid> lid fixes a beer and clam, and passes it to tasha:)
  <lid> well im 50 so i missed that secret:)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911368
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.422897
text:
  Yogo: i hate stupid people!!!!!
  Yogo: stood in the queue at a self service checkout
  Yogo: guy infront scans a bottle of milk and looks at the
  screen, a message pops up and an automated voice say "please
  place item in bagging area"
  Yogo: he looks at the screen, then tries to scan the item
  again
  Yogo: and again, "please place item in bagging area"
  Yogo: so his wife looks all confused, grabs the milk and....
  Yogo: tries to fucking scan it again!!
  Yogo: i was almost in tears
  Yogo: i think these machines should be build so if it has to
  tell you what to do 3 times a small arm should pop out and
  remove that persons reproductive organs!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911368
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.422944
text:
  @NocSchool:  3 hours left...1 page a half left...
  @NocSchool:  then i'll smoke a good bowl to forget all i've
  learnt :P
  +SnypeTEST:  NocSchool: isnt that the american dream?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911369
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.422993
text:
  <TreeSurgeon>  My lesbian friend Paula once told me that if
  god didn't intend for it to be eaten, he wouldn't have made it
  look like a taco. I rest my case.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911369
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.423035
text:
  [%proto] Master inorder to be a successful technician, one
  must learn proper english and grammar
  [@master-] tfu


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911369
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.423082
text:
  <NyseriA> Things I've learned about war from videogames: If
  you find yourself mortally wounded by an enemy sniper be sure
  to let him know that he is a faggot.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911370
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.423135
text:
  <LocK> I had a conversation about my penis with 2 girls
  yesterday
  <ezmac> must have been a short conversation...
  <ophelia> If they're pointing and laughing, it's not a
  conversation


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911370
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.423196
text:
  <@Dock> I crushed my cpu
  <@Dock> Worked though, so I didn't break it.
  <+Arrowmaster> grr wtf
  <+Arrowmaster> theres a reason its called a ZIF socket
  <@Dock> ZIF my ass.
  <ASk> a ZIF ass?
  <ASk> that's a treasure, man
  <ASk> just think of all the possibilities


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911370
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.423246
text:
  <Kurt> Good day prospective employer, I am both smarter than a
  hatful of periwinkles and prettier than two bags of smashed
  assholes.  Fail to employ me at your own risk.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911372
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.423297
text:
  <Poltergeist21> I want to fuck the olsen twins right in the
  ass!!
  <Poltergeist21> Dude, my balls goin smack smack smack against
  their teen asses..yum yum!1
  <Charlesowns> Dude, i said that ten years ago!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911372
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.423359
text:
  <Neal[CoNWork]> Not everyone's goal in life is to malign you
  <DarkPaladin> Your's seems to be
  <Neal[CoNWork]> Yeah, but I said "Not everyone's"
  <Neal[CoNWork]> That doesn't mean nobody


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911372
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.423424
text:
  «+ GearSlayr » and my cat shits on the floor now too cause
  she's getting old
  «+ GearSlayr » if its not near a litter box it just shits. it
  did it on the stairs once and i slipped on it and almost broke
  my neck
  «+ GearSlayr » i'd love to kill that cat myself.
  «+ GearSlayr » fuck it, it'll have depends on or something
  «+ GearSlayr » thats what i'll do
  «+ GearSlayr » i'll tie a diaper to my cats ass
  «+ GearSlayr » or a bag or something
  «+ GearSlayr » can you picture that?
  «+ GearSlayr » that would be the most pathetic thing ever
  «+ NathanRomulus » your cat will sit and tear it off
  «+ GearSlayr » yeah probably
  «+ NathanRomulus » and then proceed to crap on your floor
  «+ GearSlayr » seriously though that cat needs to be put down
  «+ GearSlayr » its like 17 years old
  « syrup6 » wow
  « syrup6 » old as fart
  «+ GearSlayr » and damn... you'd think my dog could just drag
  its ass outside after it takes a shit... BUT NOOOOO
  «+ GearSlayr » i know just what my dog thinks... "how can i
  piss him off... i know.. i'll drag my ass right next to his
  computer so he HAS to clean up the skid mark!"
  «+ GearSlayr » longest skid mark that dog ever made was 12
  feet... it was so amazing i had to measure it
  «+ GearSlayr » i should've taken pictures
  «+ GearSlayr » it was fucking hilarious


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911372
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.423474
text:
  <erno> hm. I've lost a machine.. literally _lost_. it responds
  to ping, it works completely, I just can't figure out where in
  my apartment it is.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911373
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.423536
text:
  <xjeff> ya'll want to see how fast I can type?
  <Cereus> not really
  <Cereus> i'd be more interested in seeing how correctly you
  can type
  <xjeff> me dont know wat u tlkin bout
  <xjeff> .........
  <Cereus> I, don't, what, you, talking, about
  <Cereus> congratulations. one word correct


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911373
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.423585
text:
  <scirDSL> I hated going to weddings. All the grandmas would
  poke me saying "You're next". They stopped that when I started
  doing it to them at funerals.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911373
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.423642
text:
  <Baby-d> I set up a shoutcast last night while I was pretty
  wasted, it's fuckin tight though
  <SilverJag> I guess
  <Baby-d> you guess!?!
  <Baby-d> show some more enthusiasim!
  <Baby-d> :)
  <SilverJag> I cant I have diahreaa


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911374
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.423746
text:
  <@Tyr> OMG
  <@Tyr> Christopher Walken reading "The Raven"
  < Trekkie> if there were an audiobook of Christopher Walken
  reading the Bible it would probably be #1 on iTunes
  <@Tyr> if christopher walken read the bible
  <@Tyr> i'd be a believer


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911374
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.423849
text:
  (+{-ReV-}) http://www.eden.rutgers.edu/~husainm/Animated/
  milkit.gif thats stupid the glass isn't even filling up how am
  i supposed to believe it then
  (jizzypop_) hehe
  (jizzypop_) you just have to have faith
  (+{-ReV-}) like the song
  (@J_bomb) rev it's a new GIF version
  (@J_bomb) if you wait long enough, they'll fill up
  (@J_bomb) it has extra frames
  (+{-ReV-}) ok
  (@J_bomb) just sit and stare
  (+{-ReV-}) i'll put my finger on the screen to mark the
  progression of the milk

  20 minutes later...

  (+{-ReV-}) ok dammit
  (+{-ReV-}) i fucking quit
  (+{-ReV-}) screw the milk


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911374
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.423923
text:
  <Jingoro`> teen pregnency is funny
  <rouge> yeah, cos those bitches are stupid.
  <Jingoro`> yeah
  <Jingoro`> they're like "boohoob boohoo my stupid boyfriend
  split after I had the baby"
  <rouge> hjaw
  <rouge> i wouldn't bareskin most chicks anyway.
  <rouge> god knows where they've been.
  <scar|home> you mean, "I woulnd't bareskin chicks even if I
  could, anyway"
  <scar|home> hjaw @ rogue
  <rouge> i said what i meant and i meant what i said.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911375
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.424066
text:
  <DarkEra> Tolkan, you must be the dumbest person on the planet
  <Tolkan> im smark...
  <Tolkan> smart.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911376
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.424138
text:
  <eurotrash> ok, wouldn't '/bind ^w next' bind ctrl-w to next
  window?
  <eurotrash> heh
  <eurotrash> err, I just u||bou||d my || key
  <eurotrash> by mistake
  <eurotrash> this sucks
  <IceKarma> eurotrash: because there are several things that
  start with "next"
  <IceKarma> eurotrash: just saying 'next' on its own isn't
  enough
  <eurotrash> heh, IceKarma must teach me this bi||d key stuff


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911376
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.424189
text:
  <Godspore> lmao, 3 1/2 floppy(a;) total size: 864GB, 224
  objects...
  <Boko> :O
  <Godspore> XD thats once fuckt up bootdisc


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911376
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.424235
text:
  <IGNORANT> why do allways the amarican punk rocker go out whit
  the bullshit new wave hokker girls i dont like it here in
  norway punkrocers go out whit punkrock girl ore tellephone
  hokkers ore les they go out whit them self and do homosexual
  aktivitis!!!!!!!!!!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911376
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.424293
text:
  <lunargirl> Without Uncle Freddy we have to rely on our dildo
  supply.
  <lunargirl> Which dwindles everyday.
  <lunargirl> But it's ok, we have a special robot made for us.
  <lunargirl> Out of dildos.
  <lunargirl> THE PERPETUAL DILDO MACHINE.
  <lunargirl> Hello?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911377
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.424349
text:
  <injektion> did she get herpes
  <PC|Holo> hahaha
  <PC|Holo> yes and aids

  2 minutes later

  <@pc|dogg> and IMSOMNIA!!!
  <PC|Holo> dogg just doesnt know when a joke is over
  <PC|Holo> hes like a real life letterman!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911377
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.424416
text:
  <Radiosity> Mom sells baby for $2,000, buys VCR and
  PlayStations
  <Frizlefry> who'd actually buy a baby?
  <Frizlefry> like I want to take care of someone else's kid
  <Frizlefry> I mean, the only way I'd buy a baby is if I were a
  pedophile or a cannibal
  <Frizlefry> BUT MAYBE THAT'S JUST ME
  <Radiosity> or both!
  <Frizlefry> yes. tenderize the shit out of it before cooking


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911377
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.424471
text:
  <well-howdy-doo> does anyone know stuff about laptops and
  their connections?
  <well-howdy-doo> well we have it connected to the dsl-works
  fine
  <well-howdy-doo> but it wont connect to phoneline
  <CowBot> RJ-45 connectors (ethernet) won't plug into a phone
  line, well-howdy-doo
  <well-howdy-doo> is there a way to configure it-cowbot?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911378
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.424526
text:
  <neekola> i should do that
  <neekola> be like
  <neekola> yo buy my dirty underwear
  <neekola> 40$ a piece
  <neekola> use the money to buy more underwear
  <neekola> i could be an entrepreneur


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911378
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.424577
text:
  <Red_Sky> Time for some Yiddish freestyle rap! This one goes
  out to all my Rabbi homiez.
  <Red_Sky> Wizzord to the oy, oy to the vay- to the 'lom
  shalabei, rockin with my niggaz, true blood niggaz! Torah
  torah torah! Hip to the hop to the skip to the drop, schmokin
  schnitzel mit my schmutzel, rock the block! I'm da freeflowin
  gentile schlemiel! What now!! What!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911378
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.424631
text:
  <_Nor> some bird's applied for my dba team leader role
  <_Nor> as her interests she lists "Motorsport, reading
  (Science Fiction, Science) and playing racing games on PS2/PC
  <_Nor> I think she's got confused and was actually applying to
  be my wife


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911378
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.424682
text:
  <JDigital> Sounds like a really, really kool hentai webcomic.
  <Subvillain> Not a webcomic, a paper manga.
  <JDigital> Manga + scanner = webcomic. DYS?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911379
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.424765
text:
  <johno> yeh not alot just finished cleaning and doin laundry.
  <jess> hahaha ok
  <johno> yuh
  <johno> theres no women around for me to yell at them to do it
  so i have to be the last resort
  <johno> i yell at myself to do it
  <johno> hit myself around the room
  <johno> then start sobbing as i mop the floor with my bloodied
  hair
  <jess> wtf seriously who the fuck are you
  <jess> thats fucked up who says that shit
  <johno> yeah good point the blood WOULD make the floor worse.
  <johno> thanks.
  quit: johno (teaching that bitch how to clean properly)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911379
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.424816
text:
  <x[conco]> morning
  <ChrisFlugel> I just had dinner
  <ChrisFlugel> still feels like morning
  <ChrisFlugel> maybe because I havent wacked off yet today


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911379
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.424866
text:
  <Dareon> Damn it.  Why is it, whenever I go down to bring up
  another window and slip, I always wind up launching Worms?
  <Iago> It's a sign.
  <Dareon> ...If the universe wanted me to go play with squishy
  pink things, they should send me porn popups.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911380
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.424925
text:
  <three-hams> http://us.feamerch.com another good ass band
  <charliex> ass band
  <three-hams> (insert hymen between good and ass)
  <three-hams> err
  <three-hams> hyphen
  <three-hams> my god I'm an idiot


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911380
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.424975
text:
  <gaz> i don't think terrorists would be stupid enough to do
  anything on independence day anyway
  <gaz> not after the aliens did it


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911380
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.425025
text:
  (OvrLrd-Q) my longest pw was a case sensitive @ 26
  (killjoy) i never use long ones.
  (OvrLrd-Q) easily breakable by a slightly modified dictionary
  though :)
  (OvrLrd-Q) was
  (OvrLrd-Q) weapon from game + weapon from game + beverage
  ingredient
  (OvrLrd-Q) crap
  (OvrLrd-Q) that reminds me
  (OvrLrd-Q) that 'beverage ingredient' is my root pw for my
  *nix box
  (killjoy) caffiene !?!?!?
  killjoy starts scanning ovrlrd's ip range
  (killjoy) ITS THERE SOMEWHARE
  (OvrLrd-Q) WTF


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911380
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.425073
text:
  <Jam> brb, I think my parents are having sex
  <Sentynel> ...why brb?
  <Asperoth> he wants to go find out for sure?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911381
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.425124
text:
  <dweez> f33dback, opinions are like assholes
  <f33dback> so if you don't have one you're full of shit?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911381
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.425177
text:
  <coquelicot> after talking to this girl for a while
  <coquelicot> i've come to the conclusion that she's into me
  <theworstisover> a blind/deaf/retarded person could have told
  you that
  <coquelicot> well they should, because i think that would be
  very comical to hear and watch


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911381
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.425242
text:
  <PuBeNeMy-> bahaha
  <PuBeNeMy-> jaymee just walked by the bird
  <PuBeNeMy-> and it yelled
  <PuBeNeMy-> SLUT
  <cvc> although it does sound funny
  <Matt^^^> PuBeNeMy-: have you been teaching the bird dirty
  words?
  <cvc> nah, he's been teaching the bird to be a judge of
  character


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911382
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.425330
text:
  <dora> I got one of those new penus razors
  <rigel> ...
  <dora> shit, I meant venus
  <dora> BAD typo
  <KAb0rN78> p and v are not even next to each other..
  <rigel> now we all know what she's thinking about
  <dora> :P


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911382
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.425378
text:
  SnatchFace: I stumbled into the bathroom this morning after
  being up half the night with stomach pain and grabbed the
  wrong tube out of the cabinet in my stupor. I brushed for a
  half minute with Anusol HC when it slowly seeped into my
  addled brain that somethign was not quite right. I have been
  barfing ever since. Am I dying?
  Rouge: Perhaps you should change your name to Assface.
  Blazert40: I'll give you 32 mins to live.
  vi-edit: Going by your screenname, at least it wasn't Vagisil.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911382
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.425428
text:
  <Area-51> wanna know a good one?
  <AOLuser> a good one what?
  <Area-51> i mistyped the "yes | rm ..." command and deleted my
  entire home directory, including the eggdrop :P


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911382
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.425486
text:
  <Gemini4t> I'm going to become rich and famous some day when I
  design a keyboard that has spring-loaded needles hidden inside
  the caps lock button.
  <Gemini4t> Some newbie tries to type 'WOW WUT IS UP???? LOLZ'
  and instead he types 'AH FUCK MY FINGERZ BLEEDIN'


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911383
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.425542
text:
  <frogger> does anone know of an algorithm to generate random
  numbers in an increasing sequence?
  <JubJub> Use the Pullit-Hofften method
  <frogger> what's that?
  <JubJub> Just ask cheesy how many times he's masturbated today
  <CheeseZone> 11, why?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911384
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.425756
text:
  <Error1355>: Cows can feel pain, emotions, depression, etc
  just the same as us, so why do we have the right not to be
  hurt and incarcerated and they don't? What makes us so
  special? If it is our ability to *think* then babies and
  mentally handicapped adults should have no rights either. Why
  the discrepancy?
  <or_something>: well im going to start eating retarded babies
  to make that person feel better


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911384
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.425800
text:
  PlasmaPhire: the definition of irony...
  RFizzyWig: what
  PlasmaPhire: people are sharing Kazaa Lite, the one that's not
  free, on regular Kazaa
  RFizzyWig: hahaha


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911385
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.425894
text:
  <brolli_420> World Heavyweight Championship: Triple H
  (Champion) vs. Unknown Opponent
  <brolli_420> WOW
  <brolli_420> that should be a good match -_-


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911385
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.425935
text:
  slightlypissed : I once got hit on by an old man when I was
  leaving a cicuit city :(
  sourgirldaisey : hahahah
  sourgirldaisey : did you get his number?
  sourgirldaisey : :)
  slightlypissed : no, I kinda just walked faster


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911385
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.426029
text:
  <timmo> you know maybe we need a real woman in here to help
  us, give us a womans point of view cause i mean if i asked
  amanda what makes a man a badass
  <timmo> how much you want to bet she would say something like
  <timmo> great grammar and 100% kill rate in quake


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911386
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.426085
text:
  <Sprint_DSL> Are you still living in the wang of the US?
  <POPOON> Your mother is.
  <Sprint_DSL> Oh.
  <Sprint_DSL> That would have been good like, 10 years ago.
  <POPOON> Your mother was.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911386
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.426147
text:
  <nutkase> i need to schedule an eye exam
  <nutkase> with a different doctor who wont cuss me out and
  tell me i need ritalin
  <hateful> lol, did you jump when he was putting in the drops?
  <nutkase> no
  <nutkase> but when he was asking me which one was better
  number 1 or number 2 i was like how come there numbered and i
  only get 2 options
  <nutkase> and then he was telling me to read the lines, and he
  had the radio on in the background and i was asking him to
  turn it up cause i liked that song
  <nutkase> finally he said god damn it can you pay attention so
  we can get this over with and i responded with sorry i wasnt
  paying attention
  <hateful> lol
  <nutkase> and he proceeded to tell me i needed ritalin


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911386
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.426233
text:
  <radar1976> want it?
  <Spamalope> depends
  <Spamalope> how big is it?
  <radar1976> 6 inchs
  <radar1976> kidding!
  <radar1976> how big is too big?
  <Spamalope> Well.. I don't want to be downloading all day
  <radar1976> nah
  <radar1976> if I had the space I would put it on my co lo site
  <radar1976> but I can't :(
  <Spamalope> that's okay
  <Spamalope> are you just going to send here or what?
  <radar1976> no putting in on my web server
  <Spamalope> sounds good :P
  <Spamalope> just tell me where it's at when you're ready
  <radar1976> give it 4 mins
  <Spamalope> Bah. You're done in 4 mins?
  <Spamalope> What a waste of 6 inches :P


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911387
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.426278
text:
  <Rorschach`> Idiocy is the default state of all IRC channels.
  It takes a great deal of effort to raise the level of things
  to only moderately moronic.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911387
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.426419
text:
  <SDHawk> dreamweaver is for dense idiots
  <OneiWilly> dreamweaver is good use it
  <SDHawk> I rest my case


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911388
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.426466
text:
  Demonic: .............  Whoah, this conversation just took the
  offramp into Pervert Pike, going a good 80 mph even.
  Demonic: Not that I'm entirely against such a happening.
  YRS: niehter am I
  YRS: lol
  YRS: I could go for a good hentai right about now
  Demonic: Good ole hentai, glossing over Japan's major social
  problems since 1946.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911388
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.426526
text:
  * Chrispy is playing : naughty college girls volume 4
  <Chrispy> ooops
  <Chrispy> :s
  <Chrispy> lol
  <Vaine> lololol
  <z3ph> HAHHAHAHA
  <+DJ_8-Ball|eve> rofl
  <%Crysis> lmfao
  <Vaine> HAHAHAHAHAHAHA
  <z3ph> HAHAHAHA


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911388
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.426573
text:
  <Logan> oh shit, i just got coffee stains and meatball sauce
  on this guys grandma's death certificate


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911388
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.426617
text:
  <Admiral_Bayls-UltraLite> The Olsen twins are like dual core
  CPUs. They can share my load anytime.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911389
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.426669
text:
  <RunninRaven> I don't think I have once asked Jeeves a damn
  thing
  <moestavern19> I asked him once where i could find some
  kick-ass porn
  <RunninRaven> What did he say?
  <moestavern19> he said kickassporn.com


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911389
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.426723
text:
  <Dragon-Beast> Yoshi's Story
  <Dragon-Beast> so so so easy
  <lazz|away> well it wasnt exactly aimed at older gamers
  <Dragon-Beast> I know that, but I can't figure out how
  pregnant women are supposed to get the controller past the
  cervix so Nintendo can reach  its target audience.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911389
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.426776
text:
  <Fryth> What is ".net"? Some kind of asp development standard?
  <Calrathan> Fryth, distributed computing solution by MS.
  <Calrathan> in otherwords... MS can disolve computers around
  the world with this stuff
  <Calrathan> [distributed computing SOLUTION... har har har]


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911390
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.426825
text:
  * Robzy tries to remember wher goatse ASCII is...
  * Robzy wonders why the *ENTIRE* geek community is obsessed
  with goatse
  <Tripwire> Robzy: it's tradition
  <Robzy> Has anyone ever spared a thought for the photographer
  of goatse?!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911390
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.426869
text:
  <control_m> hi.. im 21/m :) any girl here want to remote
  control my pc, and use and abuse it to make me slave? i have
  Radmin and Netbus 2,1 Servers running on 80.213.12.2 and i
  have autoaccept on if you want to send me another program or
  something? msg me? :)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911390
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.426919
text:
  <synk> ok
  <synk> I know this is a dumb question
  <synk> but how do you tell what kind of fish something is
  <synk> like bass or northern and stuff


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911391
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.427015
text:
  <TsN|Wildchild> yes Im a nerd... Im pushing 30 and I enjoy
  playing video games, so sue me bitch
  <TsN|AgentABC> im pushing 16 WC, i feel you pain
  <TsN|Wildchild> thats puberty abc it will pass


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911391
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.427069
text:
  <evilbob> then you must not be gay!
  <evilbob> because if you were, you'd be all over my ass like
  butter over hot rolls.
  <McGrue> Is your ass *that* hot?
  <evilbob> no, but it has its own atmosphere.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911391
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.427120
text:
  <Raven`> summer can suck ass so bad sometimes
  <Raven`> I mean sure, it's nice out and women are less clothed
  <Raven`> but there's nothing to watch on tv


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911392
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.427167
text:
  <klerck> I think they should build an airport at the WTC site
  so the planes can't miss the runway next time


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911392
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.427230
text:
  <Murielle> this just in from ABC Radio - a man went to defend
  himself when he heard a noise, stuck a .22 caliber pistol in
  his shorts..  accidently pulled the hammer back...  felt this
  stinging sensation, and a trickle of blood down his leg....
  <Murielle> he had performed a self-orchectomy
  <Murielle> :-)
  <Noelle> lol
  <Charron> hmm, so shooting your testes off "stings"?
  <Murielle> apparently
  <StephanieNYC> uhhhh
  <StephanieNYC> a stinging sensation?
  <StephanieNYC> this makes for a new definition to the term
  "numb nuts"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911393
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.427381
text:
  <KB8> im sick of you crazypale
  <crazypale> im sick of you to
  <KB8> no im sick of you crazypale
  <crazypale> no ,im sick of you to
  <KB8> you gte on my damn nerves
  <crazypale> you make my stomache turn asswipe
  <KB8> i gotta go ill pm you later
  <crazypale> ok l8r


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911393
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.427431
text:
  <Mooglezz> IRC got me into shitloads of illegal activities,
  fradulent use of coupons, video piracy, audio bootlegging, and
  hardcore pornography
  <Mooglezz> Among other things
  <MoogIezz> :(


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911394
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.427571
text:
  <AutistiCat> I'm forgetful.
  <AutistiCat> Yet I can remember 50 digits of pi...
  <Arcman> That's why, see.  That took up all your brain space.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911394
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.427629
text:
  <+me0w> the guy arrested for being involved with cutting up
  those bodies in london is wearing a cyberdog tshirt in that
  pic!
  <+me0w> there was a serial killer, forget which one, he used
  to chop up kids and cook them
  <+me0w> but he said he tried a kid's dick
  <+me0w> and it was too chewy
  <+me0w> so he tossed it into the toilet
  Tresnar (Thefreak__@dhcp160160225.columbus.rr.com) has joined.
  <Aniki> thats what the guy here said too. first they wanted to
  eat the penis raw, but it was too chewy, so they had to cook
  it
  <Tresnar> ... What the heck did I wander into?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911394
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.427696
text:
  <TDS> THAT MAKE NO SENSE ANYWAY. IF 50 % OF AMERICANS ARE
  BELOW AVERAGE INTELLIGENCE, HOW CAN IT BE AVERAGE?
  <SneakAtack> TDS is an idiot. half the people are below the
  average and half the people are above the average. that's why
  it's an average.
  <Moik> >_< TDS makes the upper half possible.
  <Bob_Dole> ROFL @ Moik
  <SneakAtack> hehee
  <SneakAtack> I feel almost bad. I should have waited for more
  people to reply and then agreed with TDS.
  <TDS> that was a momentary lapse. my iq has been found to be
  163.
  <FFVI> You forgot a decmial point, TDS
  <SneakAtack> TDS: 163 with a mean of 500?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911395
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.427745
text:
  <Betty> So, wanna go see a movie tomorrow
  <Sokol> NO! I toled you, i haev a girlfriend!!!
  <Betty> I AM YOUR GIRLFRIEND YOU STONED FUCK!!!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911395
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.427787
text:
  *** wolex has joined #lockergnome
  |wolex| hi
  |wolex| Anyone active at this time?
  * nobody is
  |wolex| thanks
  |wolex| but I need some help
  * nobody can help you
  |wolex| thanks again
  * nobody wants to help you
  |wolex| have a great day then
  |wolex| oh thats better
  |wolex| and why is that
  |wolex| oh. nobody is a name!!!
  |nobody| hahaha


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911397
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.427880
text:
  FLEAM0: I had to watch Memoirs of a Geisha with my friend's
  Japanese exchange student...I kept wondering what I would
  think if I went to Japan and they showed me a movie called
  Memories Of A Hooker


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911397
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.427976
text:
  < ^Tommi^ > if bill gates would play pacman in an arcadehall
  and every game would cost 0.5$ (and take 10 min), he could
  play in 6.3 million years!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911398
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.428036
text:
  <shapr> whoa, my erc mode line is [#h,#e,#l,#p], I think my
  computer is trying to send me subliminal messages.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911398
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.428196
text:
  <tr0n> OBLIQUE WROTE THE BOOK "101 HOME REMEDIES TO CURE
  WANKER'S CRAMP".
  <tr0n> AND IS NOW WORKING ON "HOW TO RESTORE RECTAL
  ELASTICITY"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911399
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.428256
text:
  <Danae> From the viewpoint of an uncorrupted Christian guy,
  what would candles mean?
  <paranoid> He wants sex.
  <Iggles> sex.
  <Danae> Danae will devirginized once married.
  <paranoid> Devirginized? By the Devirginizer?
  <paranoid> I don't know how you "pure" and "uncorrupt" people
  work, he could be giving you candles to justify his guilt of
  fantasizing about you when he beats off all his curbed
  christian rage into a sweatsock late at night.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911399
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.428300
text:
  <Mazroth> A girl waved to me once before making out with her
  boyfriend, does that count as scoring?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911399
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.428396
text:
  <Cuthalion> I figured out why I'm not getting mad chixorz.
  <majesty> ?
  <Cuthalion> My humours are off. I need more blood and vitriol
  and less bile and phlegm.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911400
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.428440
text:
  <PUTZINGoff> Does a kid wake up one day and say Mommy/Daddy I
  want to grow up to be a PROCTOLOGIST!!!!!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911400
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.428492
text:
  <Jim Kuhn> I just think it is silly that if I live in certain
  states in a 'free country' that I am not allowed to even read
  a poker forum.
  <DrSavage> What gave you an impression that you live in a free
  country?
  <bigalt> fox news


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911400
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.428537
text:
  <roman> skitzo, dude, when i was like 8 or something, i was on
  the floor .. on my back, trying to see my asshole.. and i was
  sucking air in with my asshole.. and farting it out.. when my
  brother walked in on me.. and i lost control of my stomach and
  a fucking turd popped out and landed on my chest


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911401
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.428602
text:
  <Bravo56> How the hell is a penguin considered a bird? It
  can't fly!
  <Gremhawk> It has wings?
  <Bravo50> Ya, and I have man titties, that doesn't make me a
  woman.
  <Gremhawk> No, that just makes you a man with larger than
  normal breasts.
  <Bravo56> Go suck a dick.
  <Gremhawk> Your the woman, you do it. I'll just tell you how
  good it is.
  <Bravo56> I hate you.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911401
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.428652
text:
  <+TreeSquid> From: "Lots_Of_Lobster@I-Like_Lobster"
  <+TreeSquid> Subject: Click here for chance to win 50 lbs.of
  lobster!
  <+TreeSquid> what the fuck, lobster spam?!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911401
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.428698
text:
  <incubus_0> @find xxx (not porn)
  <DCP> haha.. incubus.. i doubt anyone labelled their release
  XXX.Not.Porn.TS.VCD-Centropy


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911401
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.428796
text:
  * Tschech0w tries to phone anyone on site ...
  <Tschech0w> ah.
  <Tschech0w> oh.
  <Tschech0w> ugh.
  <RichiH> Tschech0w: the telephone attacking you?
  <Phoon> sounds like it's raping him
  <Isle> ohhhh
  <RichiH> bringing phone sex to a whole new level


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911402
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.428851
text:
  * stormo is potentially cosplaying at manifest this year
  <DannyS> stormo: you'll still lose all respect
  <DannyS> i mean, it's like voluntarily going out in front of
  traffic and ramming a set of computer speakers up your arse
  <DannyS> except the latter gets you more friends and respect


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911402
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.428919
text:
  <Spliff> What's the meaning of life?
  <CrystalShard> To find out whats the meaning of life.
  <Rivorus> woah
  <Rivorus> deep
  <CrystalShard> "We are the Universe that is trying to
  understand itself." - Delenn, Babylon 5.
  <Rivorus> "I like chicken, I like liver" - Kitten, Meow Mix
  commercial
  <CrystalShard> Woah.
  <CrystalShard> Deep.
  <Rivorus> hahahaha


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911403
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.429092
text:
  <kolby> I'm up at UT and my friend fucked Chris Simms but
  would never give me his number, she left her phone here...I'm
  so gonna get laid
  <KenKaniff> Who
  <KenKaniff> Wait
  <kolby> Chris Simms is the QB for U.T.   I don't know, he's
  famous here
  <KenKaniff> Are you a girl?
  <KenKaniff> Because if you arent
  <kolby> and he's also a douche bag
  <KenKaniff> You're talking about getting fucked by a guy
  <kolby> im a guy
  <KenKaniff> And that would make you gay
  <kolby> you're talking about little boys
  <KenKaniff> I'm Ken Kaniff.
  <KenKaniff> Thats what I do
  * kolby was kicked by timmo (GAY KICK)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911403
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.429183
text:
  <jonathans> i can stand on the sides of my ankles
  <jonathans> both heels inward
  <jonathans> i can balance on one for a bit
  <clay> i can touch my penis with my hands


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911404
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.429236
text:
  <-(@Bloodshed)-> God my nuts stink
  <-(@Bloodshed)-> *What The Fuck*
  <-(@SleazyC)-> lmao..
  <-(@SleazyC)-> you smell your nuts
  <-(@Bloodshed)-> Well, I don't want to walk around with
  stink-nuts and not know it


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911404
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.429281
text:
  atomicmint2006: this whole project raped me in the butthole
  dahlia: that's no good.
  dahlia: butthole sex needes tenderness and lube.
  atomicmint2006: yeah, well this project
  atomicmint2006: used a sandpaper condom


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911404
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.429325
text:
  <Antiarc> Ever have one of those moments where you get out of
  the shower, get dressed and all, and then realize that you
  left your webcam on broadcast mode?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911405
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.429484
text:
  <AlexMax> holy hell
  <AlexMax> i just spent 3 hours working on what's essentially
  the equivalent of "if then"
  <bioXar|K0Li0> AlexMax, i kno i guy who had an exam. the
  question was "what is bravery?".
  <bioXar|K0Li0> he had 4 hours for that exam
  <bioXar|K0Li0> he sat 4 hours without writing anything
  <bioXar|K0Li0> and in the last minute he wrote
  <bioXar|K0Li0> "THIS IS BRAVERY"
  <bioXar|K0Li0> and got an A
  <bioXar|K0Li0> :)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911405
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.429539
text:
  <Pikaben> Dude. I just heard my little sister shout "I'm not
  naked!".
  <Pikaben> Should I go check what's going on?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911406
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.429611
text:
  <CryptoKnight> i was at my girlfriend's house yesterday
  <CryptoKnight> and we are having sex
  <Hektik_Sniper> ...
  <Hektik_Sniper> TMI
  <CryptoKnight> and then we hear her mom and her mom's
  boyfriend in the next room getting started
  <Hektik_Sniper> ...
  <CryptoKnight> and then they finish
  <CryptoKnight> and then i'm still going
  <Hektik_Sniper> SHUT IT YOUR MAKING BABY JESUS CRY!!!!!!!
  <CryptoKnight> and this morning that fuck calls me a "minute
  man "
  <Hektik_Sniper> ...
  <CryptoKnight> heh


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911406
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.429661
text:
  <Byn> What's the difference between cows and the guys on this
  floor?
  <Byn> The cows don't jack off in our showers.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911406
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.429714
text:
  <paRaLyX> what's long, hard and fucked two girls from my
  science class last week?
  <Slax0r> omg...
  <qwog> you didn't!
  <paRaLyX> the mid-term physics exam :(


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911407
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.429808
text:
  <[DeViL]Hawk> dammit u sothern punk my mums rich i looked at
  the price list
  <FanBoy|Away> er? your mum is on a price list...figures


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911407
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.429854
text:
  <FreeFrag> The most secure computer in the world is one not
  connected to the internet.
  <FreeFrag> Thats why I recommend Telstra ADSL.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911408
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.429945
text:
  <yoozer> the speed of sound is defined by the distance from
  door to computer divided by the time interval needed to close
  the media player and pull up your pants when your mom shouts
  "OH MY GOD WHAT ARE YOU DOING"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911408
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.430000
text:
  <Ih8tjon> throwing a match into like, a BUCKET of gasoline
  won't do anything.
  <Ih8tjon> cause, you know, the liquid will actually put it out
  before it can burn stuff.
  <marek> m'am, i've just informed the good people at the Darwin
  Awards. They promised me they'd keep an eye on you.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911409
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.430104
text:
  <Diamond> That's because you're spoiled :D
  <Diamond> "MOM I NEED A P4 2.4GHz FOR WORD PROCESSING PLZKTHX"
  <Diamond> "MAKE SURE IT HAS A GOOD 3D CARD FOR...3D WORDS"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911409
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.430150
text:
  <MpTaNk> today, somthing on TV was going in slow motion, and
  my first reaction was "Damnit, the tv is lagging"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911410
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.430233
text:
  <RamaWURK> THe first few hours of work
  <RamaWURK> Just drag on
  <Jato> Hey Rama.
  <The_Orichalcon> Rama, play "What's that noise"
  <The_Orichalcon> it helps pass the time
  <Jato> How do you play "What's that noise"
  <The_Orichalcon> you listen for a little while, and try to
  hear a noise that you can't quite make out
  <The_Orichalcon> then you go around finding out what's making
  the noise
  <The_Orichalcon> or the multiplayer version
  <The_Orichalcon> if you have mates that are bored
  <RamaWURK> lol
  <The_Orichalcon> they make some noises
  <The_Orichalcon> and you have to find out where and what they
  are
  <Jato> TO, you are on a whole other level of boredom.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911410
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.430284
text:
  <vapoR> lately my mother has been complaining about how much
  time the dad has been spending in the computer room..
  <vapoR> she comes up to me and goes "For christmas, I want you
  to get your father a gift that will get him out of that stupid
  computer room!"
  <vapoR> so i went out and purchased him a wireless router :p


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911410
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.430332
text:
  <zamros> moose i am going to kick you in the groin until the
  only thing you have there is a bloodied mass of pulp
  <Mooseka> HAHA, YOU'RE TOO LATE


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911411
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.430434
text:
  <RedVapor> hearing my dad say "Wow, Tifa's hot." is scarring
  <RedVapor> You wanna know what I replied with? "No duh, dad.
  Funny thing is, I have a better chance witgh someone like that
  then you do." I was grounded for 2 weeks
  <ecco> Yes, you have a better chance with VIDEO GAME
  CHARACTERS
  <ecco> ahaha dork boy


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911411
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.430495
text:
  <Tiio> Dude, I don't think I've even SEEN 15.6 gigs of pr0n.
  <Tiio> I mean
  <Tiio> in all my wanking.
  <Dogmeat> (which is quite a bit)
  <Tiio> well
  <Tiio> I don't get to watch much movies so -_-;
  <Tiio> usually have to stick to .txts, bleh.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911411
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.430543
text:
  <+nPHo> no.life = this is what you have if you are looking at
  this.
  <smcn> haw i didn't look at it


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911412
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.430589
text:
  <Skuzzi> swing programah swing programah saaawwwwiiiiing
  programa
  <j0e> Skuzzi: my opinion of your mental status remains
  unchanged.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911412
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.430639
text:
  Dainichi> Sometimes, I really do think it'd be nifty-keen to
  have another me around.
  Phantbert> no way
  Phantbert> I'd hate to have another me
  Phantbert> the last thing I need is another pretentious
  asshole to deal with.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911412
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.430687
text:
  Eros: I'm going to shave off all the hair on my body and go
  running down my street screaming about how aerodynamic I am.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911413
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.430781
text:
  <vodak> Adding files to WinAmp has gotten much easier now that
  I realized 'enqueue' wasn't spanish...


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911413
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.430839
text:
  <Actaeon> Stupid three-dimensional universe.
  <Violetnite> Better than a two dimensional universe.
  <Actaeon> Well, depends on the dimensions.
  <Actaeon> And really, it is a good/bad thing.
  <Violetnite> What is the good and bad.
  <Violetnite> Just curious.
  <Actaeon> The three-dimensionality makes it so that I am
  seperated from people I meet on here by actualy traversable
  space. On the other hand, three dimensions are necessary for
  tits. So, guess I just have to deal.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911413
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.430895
text:
  <Nassty> So we were playing a peaceful game of Trivial
  pursuit...
  <Nassty> and the Question is "What are the first 3 words of
  the bible?"
  <Nassty> Before I even finish the question, my friend jumps in
  and says, "Once upon a time..."


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911414
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.430943
text:
  <ArnRim83> An issue of Nintendo Power I have, (Issue 16) calls
  Pilotwings "Flight Club". Another tentative title I guess
  <anarchy99> YOU DO NOT TALK ABOUT FLIGHT CLUB


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911414
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.430990
text:
  <Drezdar> I am a white, supple 21 year old male from New York
  City.  I enjoy the big life...when I leave my house.  I enjoy
  computer games, PS2 games, Xbox games, Dreamcast games, SNES
  games, N64 games, GBA games, Genesis games, Amiga 500 games,
  C64 games, Atari 800XL games, and porn.  I am very good at
  masturbation so I think I would be very good in bed.  If you
  would like to meet me, email me or cyber me on AIM.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911414
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.431043
text:
  Tester Bob> Maybe Scott will get fired if we send really bad
  things over his company's network
  Tester Bob> Porn
  Tester Bob> Fuck
  Tester Bob> Vagina
  Abdullah> "Bush/Cheney in '04"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911414
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.431091
text:
  <Koentje3> There are 2 secrets to follow if you want to live a
  succesfull life
  <Koentje3> Rule #1: Don't tell all ur secrets


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911415
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.431191
text:
  <cade> zzz, you wanna kill yourself or something?
  <zZz-> cade, I've attempted so many times and failed, it's not
  even funny..
  <zZz-> Accually, it is kinda funny.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911416
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.431289
text:
  <repp0r> Dude, pot first, then porn.
  <repp0r> Trust me. It's so much better. :D
  <lele> dude i'm doing before AND after


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911416
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.431337
text:
  <Uhh_Duh> relationships are so easy thanks to the internet..
  you can establish and destroy them at the touch of a few keys!
  <black-ice> it all starts with 3 letters, asl
  <black-ice> and ends with stfu


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911416
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.431395
text:
  *** Quits: Light^NG (i got chikz in da livin' room gettin' it
  on, and they ain't leavin' 'till six 'n the morn')
  <rhythm> what the fuck
  <rhythm> i wanna go to his house


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911416
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.431456
text:
  <Nelyx> DilleMMa: thomas edison went through 3000 experiments
  before he perfected the light bulb
  <DilleMMa> wow
  <DilleMMa> another geek prevails
  <Nelyx> show me someone successful who ISNT a geek
  <DilleMMa> britney spears?
  <DilleMMa> christina agerlia
  <DilleMMa> mandy moore
  <Nelyx> whore <> successful


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911417
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.431518
text:
  <mindfuck> root@black-jes:/etc/mail# man how to get laid
  <mindfuck> No manual entry for how
  <mindfuck> No manual entry for to
  <mindfuck> No manual entry for get
  <mindfuck> No manual entry for laid
  <mindfuck> root@black-jes:/etc/mail#
  <mindfuck> <|:]
  <Nikita> sucks
  <Nikita> see if there is an RFC for that
  <Nikita> maybe a mini HOW-TO or something...


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911417
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.431572
text:
  <pvx> why do these psycho's always msg my bot?
  <xf> Because that is what psychos do.
  <MenTaLguY> more to the point, why do a majority of them seem
  to be from Brazil?
  <xf> Because that is where psychos live.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911417
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.431630
text:
  <jenn> canada is ned flanders to usa's homer simpson.
  <slurpee> hahahahahahahah
  <slurpee> so true
  <slurpee> "hidely-hodely, neighborino!"  "shut up, canada."


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911418
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.431685
text:
  <SpitZ> this sms was sent by a friend of mine
  <SpitZ> Sally mr. pls,2wedding
  <SpitZ> What's that supposed to mean?
  <crazhee> i think it read as "Sally mist'er period. please
  comma to wedding"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911418
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.431745
text:
  <LuminousPath> somebody after with the main envi'-boy it has
  the recovery;)
  <LuminousPath> I have succeeded in confusing them all.
  <LuminousPath> Now, in the confusion, I shall cause an
  overload in the main mIRC hub.
  <LuminousPath> This will cause horendous bottlenecks,
  netsplits and profile colapses
  <LuminousPath> In the confusion, I shall route all
  transmissions through Area 51.
  <LuminousPath> This will overload their main servers, causing
  them to have a netsplit
  <LuminousPath> I shall repeat this process thosands of times
  over...
  <YusukeUrameshi> LuminousPath: you do not know much of IRC do
  you?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911418
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.431797
text:
  <Fustard> i should take a picture of my penis like orion, and
  give it away as a present
  <w3nis> maybe you shouldnt
  <DigDug> yeah, maybe you shouldn't
  <Fustard> yeah maybe i shouldnt


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911418
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.431861
text:
  <Zombie> sisters are good
  <Sony> She is fat
  <Sony> and she smells
  <Sony> like bear
  <Zombie> lol
  <Zombie> perfect for you
  <Sony> Yeah, I'd hit it
  <Sony> Wait
  <Sony> I mean now
  <Sony> no*


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911419
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.431913
text:
  *** Perz has joined #dorkydungeon
  <Perz> YES!!!!!
  <Perz> FINALLY CABLE!!!!!!!
  <Perz> NO MORE GOD DAMN DISCONNECTS BECAUSE OF MY FUCKING
  MODEM!!!!1
  <TormenT> yay :D
  *** Perz has quit IRC (Ping timeout)
  <TromenT> lol


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911419
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.431956
text:
  maus: man do I need a wifi card for my laptop; I tried to plug
  into a router at a downtown coffee shop and they got all mad
  at me


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911419
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.432013
text:
  <Kerrick> Thank you for installing the newest in microsoft
  products: Microsoft Church
  <Kerrick> Error! file: pope.bmp contains corrupt data, and
  cannot load
  <Kerrick> Please follow these simple steps so we can customize
  Microsoft Church to your liking
  <Kerrick> Step 1: Which of your children would you like to be
  molested? []Billy  []Michael  []Timmy
  <Kerrick> Step 2: with the addition of papyal tithing is even
  easier! (to continue donate 1/10 of your salary via the paypal
  button)
  <Kerrick> Step 3: Microsoft church will go inot full screen
  mode and cannot be closed for 2 hours every Sunday []morning
  []afternoon []night
  <Kerrick> Thank you for setting up microsoft church!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911420
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.432067
text:
  <The_Enigmatic_Lemur> Hmm whats a nice sophisticated term to
  put on a resumé for fast food cook.
  <Drain> ...
  <ZS|GTA3> ...
  <Geno|Morrowind> Hamburger Helper
  <ZS|GTA3> Ahahah.
  <Drain> ahaha


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911420
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.432121
text:
  <7ruth> Oh my god! I'll be right back, parents are making me
  barbeque.
  <Sentral1>Im pretty sure that was a literal version of
  'omgbrbbbq'
  <Xthirteen>yep


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911420
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.432173
text:
  <MagnaUnum> just got off the phone with a redhead
  <MagnaUnum> she's cool
  <MagnaUnum> she likes helping retarded kids though
  <MagnaUnum> I dunno if I can justify that with my conscience


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911420
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.432225
text:
  <arsifoofoo> you know...
  <arsifoofoo> people rub corn on themselves for skin therapy
  <arsifoofoo> "hard pore cornography"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911421
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.432279
text:
  <Lethalmartini> tawnee stone rocks
  <Lethalmartini> shes like, our age
  <bobrooney> never heard of her
  <Lethalmartini> shes this girl from texas whos 18 and knows
  how to do what a woman does best
  <bobrooney> laundry?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911422
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.432436
text:
  <Bork_Tanbey> pretty soon EA's creativity on expansion packs
  is going to run dry
  <Bork_Tanbey> then they're going to have to start thinking
  retroactively
  <Bork_Tanbey> The Sims: Text RPG
  <Bork_Tanbey> "Buy Washing machine"
  <Bork_Tanbey> "place washing machine north of dryer"
  <Hotwire> "rotate east"
  <Hotwire> "rotate east"
  <Hotwire> "change color to red"
  <Bork_Tanbey> "impregnate slutty neighbor"
  <Hotwire> "slap neighbour and run from child support"
  <Bork_Tanbey> "challenge everything!"


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911423
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.432491
text:
  <smcn> one of these days
  <smcn> i'm going to hunt down and kill whoever invented
  emoticons
  <smcn> then i'm going to look at him and go >=D


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911423
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.432547
text:
  <GLE> Does eating a chunk of cheese rolled in sandwich meat
  make me a fatass?
  <JimiThing> im inclined to say yes
  <JimiThing> but depends on the size and type of cheese
  <JimiThing> and the kind of meat
  <GLE> Sunrise thin-sliced turkey, and old cheddar cheese with
  a volume of about... 5 cm^3?
  <Phil_> Nah... but I'm pretty sure figuring out the volume of
  a piece of cheese makes you a virgin.


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911424
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.432685
text:
  <mooman> so i saw this number plate on some ricer car today...
  YAG-108
  <mooman> except i saw it in my rear view mirror, so it looked
  like BOI-GAY
  <mooman> i nearly hit the car in front from laughing so hard :
  /


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911424
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.432813
text:
  *** Quits: Zathras (Evelyn the dog, having undergone further
  modification pondered the significance of short-person
  behaviour in pedal depressed, pan-chromatic resonance, and
  other highly ambient domains. "Arf," she said.)


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911425
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.432860
text:
  <WarMoose> Think about how stupid the average person is. Now
  realize that half of them are dumber than that.
  <Chunda> Why half?


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911425
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.432915
text:
  [vvandering_nomad] I took some of that fake blood one night,
  and made it look like my eye was gushing blood. I walked up to
  the front office of the complex where this poor cute little
  asian gal was working.
  [vvandering_nomad] I walked up to her and said "Is Student
  Health Services open?"
  [Lehsa] ROFL
  [vvandering_nomad] I scored some free wet-naps!
  [Ku'vah] LOL
  [Lehsa] you are so mean Nomie
  [Ku'vah] I need to get some fake blood
  [vvandering_nomad] She almost called an ambulance, until I
  convinced her that I was "getting some pills for it." and that
  it "Happens every winter."
  [Lehsa] LOL
  [Lehsa] rofl
  [Ku'vah] LOL
  [lvlarein] Haha


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911425
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.432974
text:
  <Red_Avatar> Select [192kbps 44100Hz 03:53min] Mandy Moore -
  Only hope
  <Darth-Phenom> Mandy Moore!! ROCK ON
  <Red_Avatar> don't mock the music my girlfriend gave me!!
  <RaptorMkII> Sure, your girl friend.
  <RaptorMkII> IF YOUR GIRL FRIEND'S NAME IS KAZAA!


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911425
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.433024
text:
  *** Kelly19_ (phelix@arena.cwnet.com) joined #hack at 14:12
  [885420755] <#hack/Kelly19_> Hi, my name is Rachel.  I'm gonne
  be a spam^H^H^H^Hporn model!  wanna see my pictures?  too bad!
  wanna click on cool banners?  uhh. shit. i forgot my own
  webpage! TEEHEE!
  <#hack/Kelly19_> ok sorry guys, no porn for you today! bye
  now!
  *** Kelly19_ (phelix@arena.cwnet.com) left #hack at 14:12


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911426
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.433122
text:
  <[FYAD]Chem-Commando> hey guys
  <[FYAD]Chem-Commando> a man with dark skin just picked up my
  television and went out the door
  <C_Cardigan> reparations for slavery
  <C_Cardigan> not a thing you can do


date: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.911426
submitted_at: 2024-10-13 20:41:06.433182
text:
  <implexor> some of my friends were smoking pot in a car. After
  some laughing they started to cruise around town. Drove for a
  while and while going round a roundabout one of them noticed
  that it would be funny to drive on it backwards. It was funny
  until the inevitable happened and they've hit another car.
  <dsarr> lol
  <implexor> w8 there's more. They went silent and just sit
  frightened in the car. Police came very quickly and started to
  talk to the driver in the car behind them. Then the policeman
  came to their drivers door, my friend opens the window, and
  the policeman goes "don't worry guys, the bloke in the other
  car is so drunk, that he's telling stories you were driving
  backwards".


